Chapter Text
Dazai hates Mori. Everyone Knows this in the Port Mafia, but next to none have the answer as to why he felt such a deep hatred towards his own boss.
Those who knew, know that it is completely justified.
Chapter one i A new mission
Dazai hates getting summoned to his boss's office for two reasons; One, there was no elevator installed in the 64
stories of the Mafia's base- which meant he had to climb up all those flights of stairs - and two, he hates Mori with all his guts.
It might seem like he was joking around most of the time, but he truly hates the man.
Anyways, he and Slug (his Partner Chuuya) had been called up for a meeting with him, and it’s totally unfair that Chuuya can just float up the stairwell!
See, Dazai could float down the stairs... Hmm, now that was not a bad Idea, but would it hurt? You see, he wasn’t
too much of a fan of dying painfully. He strictly believed in an easy, painless, suicide.
So he just trudged his way up the last of the last of the way up, thinking of other methods he could use to end it.
When he finally got to the end of the steps, he dramatically flopped to the floor, groaning at the way his legs finally got relief.
"Get up you waste of bandages!" Chauga barks down at him.
Dazai pouted up at him, "Chuuyaaa~ be more respectful to your owner or ill have to put you down!" He mumbled back to him, shoving himself up to his feet while the mutt shouts about how he ‘Wasn’t a dog you stupid idiot!’ but all Dazai could hear was an annoying idiot dog begging his owner to let him out to chase the paper boy.
Once he was stood up properly he shoved past the slug, cutting off his rant as he opened the door to Mori’s office.
Churya glared at his back, swearing that he would get back at that bastard later.
"Ah! Dazai-San, Chuuya-Kun! I was wondering where you guys were!!” Mori called out from his desk, looking up from his paperwork and smiling at them as they walked in.
"You know Dazai, Mori-san. Always slacking off.” Chuuya responded, a-bit nervously.
“Oh yes of course! Now, now, have a seat now you two!” he Insisted, gesturing to the seats in front of his desk.
Chuuya and Dazai shuffled over, subtly bumping into each other, glaring the whole time.
Once they were settled in front of him, he placed down forms before both of them.
After a few minutes of silence, Dazai’s head shot up and stared at him in disbelief. “ A School?? With children!? For a whole year???! " He spewed out, not wanting to have to deal with Kids, and for a full year at that!
Mori gave him a dark look, "When has how long a mission is stoped you? I dont want any excuses Osamu. You will take this job whether you like it or not.”
Chuuya did not envy Dazai at times like this. Times where he actually pissed the man off.
He knows that when when his boss gave the Mackerel one of those warning looks that he won’t show himself for at least 4 hours, some times even days, and when he did, it was with more bandages, hiding an injury of sorts that was left uncared for- which meant Chuuya had to take care of it.
It didn’t paint a pretty picture, but what could he do about it other than bandage the Mackerel up after?
"I expect both of you on a plane tomorrow. I assume you don’t know why your going to this particular school?” They both shook there heads when he finished speaking, “All the info that you need will be sent to your emails.” He continued on, “Also!! Dazai come see me later- I have a new outfit for you! Now shoo you two, I have work to do.” He finished, smiling sweetly at the two of them as he focused back on his paper work.
Chuuya had a good idea of what this meant as well, seeing the man’s ‘outfits’ on Elise.
Dazai hates Mori’s outfits. The frilly dresses and stupid makup that went along with it didn’t help, but he was used to it by now.
"This school is for children with magic, Shuji,” The man explains, as if Dazai hadn’t read the emails the man had sent him, “Your ability has a chance of canceling out this entity but we have no idea if you can produce it yourself, I’m pretty sure you can, but if you can’t, you become an asset: Run. I dont care how you have to get away. Get back here or hide until we can find you.” He finished right after tying the last bow.
“Severes Snape and Abus Dumbledor will be waiting for you two to get off the plane they are your new teachers, so you must act accordingly. No bickering in-front of them, your besties, got it?”
Their plane leaves in five minutes, he needs to stop yapping, Dazai grumbles to himself.
"Go along now.” Mori pretends to wipe a tear off his cheek.
In the plane Dazai of course had to order crab.
Chuuya had tried to order wine, but got rejected because of his age. Poor dog, not even 12 and already an alcoholic, Dazai pity’s his liver in 20 years.
Most of the flight was boring, other than when they fought, managing to piss off the flight attendant 5 times and counting.
They went given a description of the professors so they got their luggage and went to a restaurant in the airport’s lounge. Dazai, of course refused to eat anything other than crab so he pouted in his chair while staring at his partner in disgust as he at the nasty American ‘Burger’. Honestly, he never had any appreciation to the obviously superior food like crab!
"Dont look at me like that shity Dazai. Your lucky they had crab on the plane or else I’d be shoving food down your throat right now.” That slug deadpanned at him. DEADPANNED, can you believe it? "Ahh- Chuu Chuu... your being a horrible mutt to your owner right now! So disrespectful honestly…” He blinked up at him innocently as he began to stutter out insults at him.
A silky voice interrupted the two of them suddenly. "Do you happen to be Dazai Osamu and Nakahara Chuuya?” He mispronounced their names and it made Dazai want to make fun of Chuuya, that bastard, who was probably thinking the same thing judging by his smirk which quickly fell when he caught Dazai’s stare.
"We might be.. Who’s asking?” Dazai asks the man in question. He’s dressed in long robes with flats to match even his hair was black, damn, Dazai has a competitor it seems.
“Im your new professor, Severus Shape." The man snippets.
"You will refer to me as such in the future.”
He smirked up at him, ”Yes sir!" He saluted. A new man popped up beside Snape, his robes matching his hair, graying with age.
“Ah! My boy, you’ve found them I presume?” He questioned the professor, smiling warmly at the boys.
“This is Headmaster Dumbledore,
And yes, Albus,” Snape looks like he would rather be anywhere other than here and Dazai can’t blame him.
“Ah how wonderful!!” The old man exclaimed, clapping his hands together like a toddler.
Dazai hid his disgusted face behind a warm smile he shot to the man, Albus.
"Hello professor. Im Dazai Osamu and this is my friend Chuuya!” He reached his arm around him to pull him into his side, let them underestimate you by acting like a child. You wouldn’t believe how helpful it could be in the future.
“May we sit with you Mr. Dazai?" Dumbledore questions, sitting when the boy nodded.
"I would like to explain some things to two about magic, as I presume you are muggle-born?"
"What is a muggle sir? Chuuya questions.
This was actually a subject the two hadn’t gone over in any book or article Mori sent them.
Ah, a muggle is what us magic folk call normal people. There is also Pure-bloods, people who come from a long line of magic, half-bloods Who come from a witch or wizard from a Pure-blood and muggle-born parents- muggle borns are magical people born to muggles that have no magical connection.” Albus went on about things that were not in the reports, so Dazai and Chuuya were forced to listen with rapt attention.
All the while Snape was sitting across them, staring in obvious distaste. Dazai couldn’t help but wonder if he was one of those blood purists or whatever they were called.
He assumes that they were a group of people to look out for, Mori had said something to them about people who ‘had a long line of magic’ followed some guy named Voldemort, they called themselves Death Eaters.
Seriously, who came up with names in this organization?? A horrible person who should not be allowed to have children and name them, that’s who.
He was forced to blink back into existence when he heard Albus say that they should leave if they want to… catch the ‘port-key’? Was that a wizard thing or just a British thing??
The boys look at each other in slight confusion as they gathered there things, Snape must have noticed because as soon as they left the air port, he explains in a clipped tone that a portkey was a magical object that can teleport people to a certain place, but only during a short period of time.
The boys exchanged looks again over there new teachers shoulders, wondering what else this strange community had come up with, was time travel real? They could find out over the next week, until the school year school starts up.
They stopped in an alleyway, where Albus picked up a can, it looked like a piece of trash, but they listened when they told them to hold on to it, Albus muttering a few words under his breath, and Dazai and Chuuya’s eyes widen slightly in surprise as the can started glowing and shaking.
Of course by now they knew by now that this wasn’t an elaborate scheme by Mori, but they hadn’t seen any magic yet.
Suddenly the world disoriented and Chuuya had to close his eyes to refrain from throwing up his meal.
What a wimp, Dazai rolled his eyes, and looked at his surroundings, they were in a new place, it looked like a tavern of some sort?
Dazai nudged his partner so he would open his eyes again, getting an elbow to the stomach in turn.
“Welcome to the leaky Cauldren!!” A man’s voice called out to them behind the bar, “Albus, Severus, to what do I owe the pleasure?”
“Ah, Tom! Just passing through I’m afraid, although these young men might be staying until school starts up, just some out of state students you know?” Albus replies warmly. (Dazai is tired of using that word to describe this man, there was something dark lying behind his eyes.)
“Now that I think about it, you two must be exhausted!” The man turns to them, “I apologize, you had a very long flight and then we used a portkey- I suppose we can do your school shopping tomorrow.” Dazai was secretly delighted at this revelation, his bandages needed changed, they itched like hell.
“That sounds great, but we don’t have any of your money, I assume you have your own money? We have Japanese money, Yen, but I’ve read that different states have different money.” Dazai subtly digged.
“Oh don’t worry about it my boy, I have you covered!!” Albus smiled at him, “Tom, are there any rooms open right next to each other?”
“We don’t mind sharing a room if not, sir.” Chuuya spoke up for the first time, it would be easier if they shared a room anyways.
“Oh nonsense, we have two rooms open on the second floor, rooms 108 and 109” the bar tender responded.
The man, Tom, led them up to their rooms and Albus and Snape left with promises to return tomorrow- Albus not Snape.
When they finally settled, Dazai belly flopped onto his bed with Chuuya berating him to change his bandages “-or I’ll do it myself you bastard, and I’ve done it before so don’t think I won’t do it again!” His voice was supposed to be threatening, but it came out more tired than it was supposed to after the day they had.
All Dazai did was grumble a fuck you and he was out like a light, acting oblivious to Chuuya’s barking.