You broke my bones and pulled away, so once my bones were mend I fixed our friendship aswell.

by Alien_star_poet

Summary:

James gets injured during full moon, his boyfriends take care of him, and Remus pulls away as he loathes and blames no one but himself.

Notes:

I did not read over this once I finished it. I wrote this during a car ride, so don't expect too much

Chapter 1: The wolf is never satisfied, so why now?

Summary:

Remus wakes up after a full moon to realize something is wrong. And Barty wants to beat him up.

Notes:

Written. Send to my laptop. Posted without edit reading, and i am a german dyslexic teen so don't be so annoyed about gramar or spelling.
Enjoyyy

When Remus woke up he felt pain, like he so often did, he couldn't remember ever waking up after a full moon without any pain accompanying the waking up. But something was very different from the usual.

 

He- or more likely what was left of the wolf in him, felt satisfied.

 

Moony never felt satisfied after a full moon. He always felt contempt at best. But never satisfied. And to the satisfaction came a sort of longing. Remus knew that was a very bad sign. 

 

He opened his eyes to find Sirius and Peter at his bed. Like always. Nothing to worry about- except, "Where is James?" He was probably getting breakfast, right? Or lunch, Remus wasn't sure how long he was out. He'd join them soon. Hopefully. But Remus didn't allow himself to hope that much, for multiple reasons.

 

1: He was a werewolf and James had spent the night running around with him in said werewolf form. He had always feared something would happen to the boys. 

 

2: He felt off. The wolf shouldn't be satisfied yet filled with longing. He was supposed to be content yet frustrated about a bad hunt. So it was wrong something had happened and now he couldn't see James.

 

3: Sirius and Peter looked worried and sad. They were supposed to look relieved and tired. Not worried and sad. 

 

Something happened. Something happened. I did something. I did something. I did something. I did something. I did som- "Moony... It's not your fault okay? It's not your fault. I know you'll blame yourself, but before I tell you this I need you to understan-"

 

But Remus didn't let Sirius finish as the infirmery door opened and James's boyfriends, Rosier, Crouch, and Regulus ran in, he already knew what had happened. "I attacked James. I- is he... Is he- did I... kill him?" 

 

"No! No, you didn't kill him and you didn't hurt him. The wolf hurt him, you're not the wolf you're not the one who did this you weren't in control of yourself." Sirius reassured him but Remus could barely hear him over the static noise in his head.

 

"So he is alive? I didn't- Did I bite him?" Remus asked forcing his gaze away from where the three Slytherins who had entered stood around what was probably James's bed and to lock onto Sirius.

 

"You didn't bite him and he is alive. Your teeth only grazed him. But you didn’t, like, transform him." Sirius explained looking like he was pitying Remus. He shouldn't pity him, he should hate him.

 

"How bad is it?" Simply by the way Peter flinched at the question in the corner of his eye, Remus knew, he knew it was bad.

 

"Pretty bad... he hasn't woken up yet, and the- the scratches were pretty deep. He lost quite a bit of blood. When he hit the ground he hit his head pretty badly, we'll very badly. His body transformed back then as a defense, but transforming back while unconscious and that injured is, as you know, dangerous, so he snapped and broke a few bones during that. Moony tried to, well, either bite or eat him once James had become a human, hence why your teeth grazed him, but I was able to keep you away while Pete brought James back to Hogwarts and to the infirmery." Sirius explained quietly, not really looking Remus in the eye.

 

Before Remus could answer, Crouch had stormed over. "You did this?! You fucking-" Rosier held him back from hurting Remus. He probably shouldn't. Remus deserved this. Not the pity. Not the tenderness. He deserved the hatred. The anger and fury. He deserved to be beaten up and hurt.

 

"Barts. We don't even know what happened. And James wouldn't want you to this. Let's think here. Though I know you like to not do that." Rosier said still holding Crouch back as Regulus walked over as well.

 

"You okay?" He asked Remus.

 

"I- Yes, but how's- is he-"

 

"James is... he looked better." Rosier answered and Crouch seemed to calm down.

 

"So. What happened? Huh? Come on, tell me the little tale. And don't hold back, we know Lupin is a werewolf because we figured it out. Now what is missing is why my- our boyfriend got hurt by you or even was with you." Crouch said. 

 

"James, Pete, and I, became illegal animagi in third year to assist Remus during full moons. We figured out that animagi weren't in any danger when it came to werewolf's and like that we could make sure Remus doesn't get hurt too badly as the wolf went wild." Sirius started then paused, glancing at Peter.

 

"So, if it's soooo safe, why is James in a hospital bed unconscious right now?" Rosier asked, though Remus could tell he had a lot more questions than just that.

 

"There was a girl. Second year gryffendor I think. She probably wanted to prove herself or her bravery or something as equally dumb, thats probably why she decided taking a walk deep into the forbidden forest was a good idea. James noticed her before moony did, ran a little toward where she was still about a good 9,5 kilometers away from us, transformed back before she could see him and put on his headboy act, sending her back to Hogwarts and telling her she better run. The girl was so caught off guard that she luckily didn't ask any questions. But before prongs could turn back, the wolf already had smelled the scent of human and was in attack mode, despite James transforming back before he arrived, Moony could still trace the human scent back to him, so he attacked... and well then everything I already explained happened."

 

"That stupid little fucking girl!" Crouch exclaimed, "And that stupid fucking boy for needing to be the fucking hero all the fucking time!" He just stormed back to where James, Remus was still left to assume, lay, and sat down.

 

"Thanks for explaining." Regulus said before he and Rosier went back to the bed aswell, with Regulus sending a last pitying as well as forgiving look toward Remus.

 

-

 

When it was time for dinner, Remus was allowed to return to the dorm since he hadn't been injured that badly during his transformation. As he got up with Sirius waiting by, what Remus now knew was, James's bed.

 

Slowly Remus walked toward it, knowing he'd see James for the first time in whatever state he'd be in. James hadn't woken up yet, but Pomfrey said it wasn't worrying- not that that did any good to vanish his worries of course. Rosier and Regulus had gone to get lunch for themselves and Crouch, as the slytherin still sat at James's bed. Remus was sure that even if it had been a day with classes, Crouch would've skipped them to stay. He definitely was quite protective as well as possessive over James- which was a little hard to believe considering he and James had two other boyfriends as well.

 

When Remus finally saw James he had to hold back a gasp. Scratches that would definitely scar over his torso and his face and throat. His head wrapped in gauze his form uncharacteristically still. His bones only stabilized and not yet fixed as Pomfrey could only do that once James was awake. Remus had done this. He had scarred James forever, and still he recoved pity. James will hate him. He will never speak to him again, and the worst thing? Remus knew he deserved every ounce of hatred that would fester in James.

 

Or, if Remus was true to himself, James wouldn't. He would forgive Remus, would be like everyone else saying that it wasn't his fault. When it was. Because he was a monster. A monster who did this to James. Crouch should have beaten him bloody earlier. Because James easily forgiving Remus and acting as though it had been no big deal will be 100% worse than James hating Remus forever. Because at least the hate would be understandable and reasonable. The forgiveness he would most likely receive, was not.

 

As Crouch looked up to glare at him, he gulped. "I-I am so sorry." And then he just left, because what was he even supposed to do or say? He couldn't fix this. He didn't deserve to be as selfish as fixing this to mend his own fear of losing James.

Chapter 2: Mended bones, mended friends

Summary:

James' Point of view, his boyfriends take care of him, he mends things with Remus.

Notes:

Alright

 

It had been exactly three days since he woke up and he could leave today, tho granted in a wheelchair because apparently a little werewolf transformation stuff had gone into his system not enough to turn him- thank Merlin, but enough so that 1: he'd take a lot longer recovering because magical use was restricted. And 2: the full moon would start leaving him a little weakened and basically have weakened effects of what it does to Remus before the full moon on him.

 

At least his broken bones could be mended.

 

So his dear boyfriends decided to take him to their dorm for the first few days. Especially since Remus had been avoiding him- which wasn't hard given he was stuck in the hospital wing. But also because Barty could get very protective- especially when James just got hurt. So Evan wheeled, Rwgulus lead, and Barty walked right next to James's wheelchair with his wand drawn ready to eliminate any and every threat. 

 

He was in pain, despite the pain potions. His head was pounding and he felt like his entire body was on fire, and that every single scar was breathing and pulsing- which also hurt. Still he would never blame moony. Never.

 

When they arrived at the dorm the three boys helped him into one of the beds and started smothering him with care. It was a little amusing to see the three most intimidating and feared Slytherins at Hogwarts, turn into overly worried and protective mother hens.

 

"Do you need another pillow, Jamie?" Asked Evan once again, already carrying one over.

 

"No thanks, Ev. I think three pillows and for each leg one, making five in total, should be enough." James chuckled and even then Evan looked unsure if it was enough, and seemed to be considering giving it to him anyway, just in case. Finally he decided to listen to James and put the pillow away again.

 

Meanwhile Barty came over with soup, crackers, water, and hot chocolate. Balancing it all in his hands trying not to drop it, until Evam took the crackers and Water from Barty to assist. They put the stiff down on the bedside table and Barty even offered feeding the soup to James so he wouldn't have to move so much, but James declined. He wasn't dying after all.

 

Only Reg held back. He sat on his bed, reading, pretending not to care, but glancing up every two seconds in worry, making sure James was comfortable, alive, and in no pain. And at every ever so small sound, Regulus twitched to go over and take care of him, but always held back. It was a lot more than you'd usually get from him, so James was quite honored.

 

Eventually Barty got tired of holding his hand and carefully climbed into the bed next to James which earned him an annoyed lecture from Regulus. "Careful, you idiot! He has wounds all over his body you cant just cuddle him!"

 

Regulus got up and tried to pry Barty off, who whined "I am being careful! I wouldn't hurt him! He likes cuddles! Jamie, tell Regulus that I am careful and that ypu like cuddles."

 

"Barts is being careful and I really do enjoy cuddles." James dutifully said with a smile and a nod, his smile growing as Regulus groaned in annoyance and let go off Barty.

 

"Fine. You want to put James in pain, Barty, and you want to be in pain, James? Go ahead. But don't come crying to me when your wounds get infected or hurt like hell." 

 

"They already do, Barts can't really change that." James mumbled which earned him a gasp from Barty and an Evan scrambling to get one of the pain potions Pomfrey had given them. "Ugh you guys act like I am dying."

 

"Oh I am sorry, but you weren't there when my brothers Patronus arrived telling us you got injured badly and we're unconscious in the hospital bed, saying you're in critical condition. You were dying and we only found out when you could've been dead for hours, so I am very, very, sorry that we are being too caring right now, if you want to jump out the window just go ahead then-"

 

"Woah woah, Reg, hey, I didn't mean it like that. I am glad you guys care. And I am sorry I gave you such a fright. Thank you for taking care of me." James tried reaching for Regulus with his hands, but Barty who now lay at his sidestopped him from it.

 

"And Reg," Barty said with a cheeky grin, "You do know we are in the dungeons right? Not much window to jump out of." Regulus flipped Barty off, and he just stuck his tongue out back, as Evan stood with the pain potion looking unsure.

 

"So, do you think you'll need this? Or is the pain not that bad?" The boy wuth the white braids finally asked. Still holding the vial like it's the answer to all of James's problems, but also not wanting to do too much.

 

"I think it'd be good if I took the potion now, the pain is getting a little unbearable." James said and Evan immediately walked over, uncorking the vial and gently pouring it into James's mouth.

 

James ate his soup and crackers (luckily Regulus had cast a charm earlier to make sure the soup stays warm, since James had kind of forgotten about said soup.) He drank his water (he had already finished his hot chocolate earlier), and finally let exhaustion lull him into the promise of sleep.

 

-

 

A week later James was very much tired of waiting for Remus to come around. He could walk again, and would attend classes again the upcoming Monday, so he'd mend things with Remus, just like Pomfrey mended his bones the day he had woken up. With probably quite some pain, but still efficiently. All his friends had visited him in the dorm of his boyfriends except for Remus.

 

James had let Remus wallow in self pity for officially enough time. And it was time to set things straight. "Moony." 

 

Remus looked up from where he sat in the library with a physical flinch, "James... you- you're walking." Remus pointed out, clearly unsure of what's coming.

 

"Yep. I am walking because I am perfectly fine, and you didn't ruin my life, so can we just talk? Please?" He sat on the chair opposite to Remus.

 

"Your- your face is all scarred and your chest probably too you have- you will suffer during full moons, you were in pain for over a week. I may have not taken your ability to walk or killed you, but I didnt exactly do nothing." Remus sighed.

 

"First of all. The scars? Bad ass. Bar finds them hot, Ev finds them attractive, and Reg might not admit it but he definitely likes them too with how much he 'secretly' looks at them. You made me more appealing to my boyfriends and made me look like I am some super brave warrior or something, which is cool." James smirked and Rwmus huffed though he still looked unsure

 Progress at least. "Secondly, it's not like I'll go through what you go through. It's only about 30% of how much it affects you, and I'll just be a little out of it on a full moon night. You didnt transform me, so stop acting like you did. Third thing, the pain was very manageable with the potions thank you very much. Something that hurt more than the actual wounds was being avoided by one of my best friends and not seeing him for the entire time I was recovering. And if you're not getting the hint here, that best friend is you. I forgave you the second it happened, and I don't want to lose you because of this."

 

"But that's the thing, James." Remus sighed again, for a 17 year-old he surely sighed a lot. "You shouldn't just forgive me like that. I don't deserve that."

 

"Yes you do!" He exclaimed, "You. Didn't. Have. Any. Control. Over. The. Situation." He punctuated every word with a poke at Remus's arm. "And by simply avoiding or abandoning me, you're hurting me more than you would by sending curses my way or have by attacking me." Now James sighed too despite having just judged Remus for- well not judged but critically pointed out.

 

"I-I am hurting you?" Remus looked guilty.

 

"YES! Of course you are. I love you so so much, you're one of my best friends and I don't want to lose you! When I am losing you it hurts like shit!" James didnt care that he was being too loud and that more than one student has shushed and glared at him.

 

"Okay."

 

"Okay?"

 

"I'll accept you forgiving me... but don't expect me to not work hard to actually deserve your forgiveness. AND you're not accompanying me on full moons."

 

"For now. I won't. But maybe in the future again?" James asked, hopeful.

 

"Maybe, in the far far away future." Remus replied and James broke into a huge smile hugging Remus tightly and ignoring the pain that still shot through him at the sudden movement and pressure.

Notes:

Hope you liked it, please do point out spelling or grammar mistakes, as mentioned before this was written and not proofread,

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 1 of Rosestarkillerchaser