Hmph!

by bonfireboy

Summary:

She didn't need saving — but the baldy saved her anyway.

Chapter 1: The Baldy's Thoughts

 

“You’re far too strong… Saitama…”

 

The strongest man walked away from his fallen opponent, a shadow cast upon his face.

Lord Boros was, without a doubt, the strongest foe he had ever faced. The small thrill the hero felt once the alien stood from his first punch was undeniable. The surprise in the bald man’s eyes as his foe sent him flying with a barrage that surpassed living flesh — it was novel. Almost exhilarating.

For a few moments, the strongest man thought that a real fight was nearly at hand. He’d hoped beyond hope that this self-proclaimed ‘Denominator of the Universe’ would light a fire in his chest again. He prayed to whatever god was listening that he would feel something then. After all, wasn’t the alien in the same boat as he was? Boros was too strong, just like him. The alien said so himself.

Saitama’s face was unreadable as they clashed. Even though Boros was taking blows unlike all the other enemies he faced, even though the alien was pushing him back, there was a dark, quiet thought in the back of the hero’s mind that gnawed at him. Every punch Saitama took from the mighty alien, every blast of energy he withstood — the same dark thought slowly ate away at him. He tried to ignore it, hoping desperately that the fight would set his soul ablaze too and not just his enemy’s. But despite it all… he was unharmed. Not a single scratch was inflicted upon him. Once more, the tendrils of despair were wrapping around his heart — the thought of that dreadful stagnation gnawing at his mind all but consumed Saitama. That is, until… 

 

“COLLAPSING STAR, ROARING CANNON!”

 

That was the moment of truth. The strongest attack from the being that brought the universe to its knees. It was the hero’s last hope. If he felt nothing, then it would be over.

Saitama steeled himself. For the first time in what felt like forever, the strongest man’s fist trembled. Would this make him feel again? Was this the fight he had waited years for?

There was only one way to know.

“In that case, I’m using my own final move. Killer Move, Serious Series: 

 

“Serious Punch.”

 

The hero — the villain — the world — held its breath.

 

* * *

 

The man looked numbly at his still-smoking fist, completely unharmed.

‘I should just give up looking for a good fight.’

A bitter taste tainted Saitama’s mouth as he had that thought. After all, such dark thoughts were unwelcome in his already-dour life. But he had to face the truth: this hero business, his lifestyle, his hobbies — they weren’t fun anymore.

Admittedly, ever since Genos had arrived and he’d met some heroes from the Association, his days had become more lively. Not a couple of hours went by that Saitama didn’t find himself smiling at some small joke he’d made to himself or smirking at the antics of his apprentice. At the same time, though, it always seemed to remind him of how small he felt.

Genos was an S-Class hero. In just a few weeks’ time, he had risen to the elite of the Hero Association and was met with adoration and praise. He was fiercely honor-bound and strong, and had a firm — albeit overzealous — idea of justice. The kid was honestly incredible.

And that fact made Saitama’s qualms with Genos hard to pin down. It wasn’t like the bald hero was jealous of him — he fully believed that Genos was well-deserving of his rank, and on that belief he would never change his mind. What the blond cyborg had made him realize, however, was that aside from strength, Saitama had basically nothing to show for. He couldn’t teach his apprentice any fancy technique or killer move, and he couldn’t explain his own strength to the kid, either. What use was a full-body workout to a cyborg, after all?

Their whole master-apprentice relationship was based on half-assed teachings and an unhealthy overanalysis of Saitama’s every word and action. In all honesty, he felt like he was cheating Genos. By accepting his rent money and spouting nonsense that somehow seemed to strike a chord with the kid in return, he was no better than an internet scammer. There was basically nothing of merit he could actually give to the cyborg.

Sure, Saitama was strong. Of course he was. He didn’t know why, but that didn’t change the fact. For all the strength he had, for all the monsters he could defeat, for all the people he saved — did he really want it anymore?

The hero frowned. Deep down, he knew that he wouldn’t have it any other way. Saitama was well aware that this strength would let him keep the world safe, and that was something he would be damned if he wasn’t thankful for.

‘ But this? It’s…’

The smoking fist looked back at him mockingly.

There were no words. Saitama had just battled the strongest being in the cosmos. The being who was so strong that he had fallen into despair, just like the bald hero himself. The two were kin, in a weird sort of way. And Saitama knew they both felt it. Was there any fault in expecting something exhilarating, something that would reignite the spark of passion in them both?

Some higher beings seemed to think so. Because instead of a heart-pounding, high-stakes battle that would have connected the hearts of the two fighters in a way that nothing else could, something else happened.

One of them utterly destroyed the other. One of them died realizing how pathetic his final battle was, and the other lived knowing he could never have a real fight anymore. Hide it as he might — fool himself that the battle was more hard-fought than it really was — the truth came out in those final words:

‘You’re far too strong.’

It was so sad it was almost funny.

 

The bald man sighed. It really wasn’t like him to feel bad for himself. He should honestly have expected as much beforehand, especially after he’d discovered a normal punch was all it took to rip an arm off the alien conqueror.

Either way, the job was finished. One punch or not, he’d probably done the world a little good by bringing the destructive alien to justice. It would probably just take a while to get over. Walking dully over to the hole on the ship he made during the scuffle with Boros, Saitama realized that everything was slowly sinking. The room below him was in shadow, too.

Last he checked, there was a huge glowing orb streaming light down there. At least, that’s what his admittedly shoddy memory told him. Did that have anything to do with anything?

Maybe. Maybe not. What Saitama knew for sure was that there were no longer any lights coming from inside the ship. He very much disliked the idea of trying to find his way around the now pitch-black throne room. Looking around for another way out of the sinking ship, he realized with a small “Ah!” that he could just wait for it to crash and jump down the edge. That would probably not be for another few minutes, meaning he had all the time in the world to walk over to the side of the ship and gaze the rubble of the city below.

So he did just that.

Destroyed as it was, seeing A City from such a height was still quite a sight. The rubble from broken glass glittered like waves in the ocean, and distant buildings shimmered in the noontime light. The world spread below him as far as he could see — cloudless too — and it was kind of beautiful. In a sad sort of way. Maybe he would have been able to appreciate it if he hadn’t seen the bustle of the lively city earlier on in the day.

The ship rumbled violently. The sound of crashing debris filled the baldy’s ears.

“Oh, crap.”

Distracted by the view, Saitama almost forgot that he had another matter to attend to.

In all honesty, he would have preferred not to have any business with said matter, since… Well, it wasn’t really a ‘matter,’ per se. But a person. One that was rather unpleasant. And rude. And generally got on his nerves. And—

Saitama shook his head.

Someone needed him to be there for them. Doubtful as he was about everything, he was still a hero.

 

The green-haired girl laid on her back, breathing shallowly, as Saitama made his way over to her. Kneeling down slowly, the bald hero placed his arms underneath her. He stood up with care.

“The ship’s about to crash,” Saitama said quietly. “Hold on.”

The esper opened her eyes and looked at him weakly, not saying a word. Saitama took one last look at the city as the ship fell to the ground.

‘I wonder what I’ll have for dinner tonight.’

 

 

Chapter 2: Strange Beings

 

Half an Hour Prior

 

“Hey, C-Class losers—!” The voice of a certain S-Class esper echoed across the ruins of City A, aiming the insult at the top-ranking heroes participating in the battle. What followed was silence. Her attitude was notorious throughout the Hero Association, and many of the heroes tried their best to ignore her. Only one of the S-Class decided to voice his thoughts — a young, pompadoured delinquent that could almost feel veins popping in his head.

“We’re Class S, goddamn it!” Metal Bat shouted back at Tatsumaki, waving his fist at her.

The esper scoffed.

“Tell that to me once that disgusting flesh monster is dead, Mental Bat!” she spat. “Tch! Anyway! I took care of the cannons, so you losers stay here while I figure out a way to sink this ship, got it? Don’t try following me!”

The delinquent swore he’d just popped something in his temple — the little esper seemed to have literally struck a nerve. 

“Why don’t you just help us deal with this regenerating freak so we can figure out a way inside together?!” he called after her.

“Didn’t you say you were S-Class? Go do it yourselves!”

“Wha—!”

If Metal Bat didn’t know his weapon was indestructible, he would’ve tried smashing it on the ground. The green-haired esper was right, though. It would save them more time to split up, and it would be smart to send their strongest force to the ship as soon as possible. It was just in the way Tatsumaki said it — so self-assured and cocky — that made the delinquent’s blood boil. If she so much as whispered another insult at him again, he would personally find a way to break his bat into the esper’s smug little face.

Thankfully, before things could escalate, a tired old martial artist decided to intervene. Bang put a hand on the younger man’s shoulder to calm him down. 

“Leave her be,” the old man said patiently. “We have more pressing matters at hand.”

Metal Bat looked away from the annoying green-haired figure and nodded slowly ( ‘remember your anger management lessons, Bad’ ), bringing his attention back to the regenerating monster that he didn’t bother remembering the name of. Bang smiled in satisfaction, not knowing that the delinquent was actually picturing  a certain green-haired esper’s face on each of the creature’s heads. Metal Bat smirked, readying his trusty bat for the stress-relieving beating of a lifetime. 

“Let’s destroy this son of a—”

 

* * *

 

If Tatsumaki’s day hadn’t been horrible enough — what with her two hour wait in the Association meeting room, the city being destroyed, and her fellow ‘S-Class’ teammates proving to be utterly incompetent in the following chaos — it had just gotten worse. To her disbelief, Tatsumaki found that the enemy ship was practically demolished already!

No matter which hallway the girl took, which flight of stairs she flew up, or which door she blew down, there were no living enemies to be seen. Piles upon piles of torso-less bodies oozing green, alien blood were the only things she encountered.

And it pissed her the hell off.

Who in the world had the audacity to come aboard this ship and take care of the enemies before her?! Metal Bat? That rookie cyborg?? King??? The green-haired esper had no clue, but once she found out, she would destroy them.

Steeped in her own rage, the psychic was nearly caught off-guard by a red-skinned alien lizard wielding a sword and hammer in either hand. It cried out triumphantly as it jumped in from a hidden door to her left.

“GRAHHH! I AM ABURARUBA, THE SECRET FIFTH IN-COMMAND OF THIS SHIP!!! ARE YOU THE ENEM—AAAAAGHHGHGHHGBAGAHGB—!!!!”

The symmetrically-named alien that probably had awesome powers to show off was torn asunder by the esper. She sighed in annoyance. Was anything gonna happen today that didn’t end up driving her crazy?! There was absolutely no time for this!

Tatsumaki took deep breaths to calm herself down. If she was riled up, she wouldn’t be able to use her powers with pinpoint accuracy, which is what the situation called for at the moment. There wasn’t anything her psychic senses couldn’t find — be it the boss of the lousy maze-like ship, or the idiot that boarded the place before she did. As long as it was moving, she would be able to sense it, clear as day. She sent her powers out in waves, hoping to find the insolent worm trying to beat her to the punch more than anything else.

Tatsumaki noted that the walls seemed to slightly dampen her ability to sense presences, but it wasn’t anything a few stronger waves of psychic energy couldn’t overcome. Without hesitation, she upped her psychic output and focused on where the energy seemed highest.

That was when she felt it.

Her powers, which could not sense anything of significance beforehand, were now sending danger signals from where the red lizard monster appeared from. Something sinister was on this ship; something eerily strong. Not just that, there was another energy, too. It was much weaker, but it was a problem nonetheless. A moderately powerful enemy psychic appeared to be on-board as well. She flew off, already having completely forgotten the mighty Aburaruba and his secret sword/hammer techniques.

 

Tatsumaki had to give it to her kill-stealing opponent — he was quite efficient.

Whoever it was that killed all those enemies, it seemed that they had ended each fight in one massive blow. That narrowed the suspects down to Puri-Puri Prisoner, Tank-Top Master, Metal Bat, Watchdog Man, Darkshine, King and Silverfang.

It didn’t really narrow it down that much, actually. The psychic tsked.

If a physical fighter like that was pitted against a psychic — especially of the caliber of the one she sensed — it would likely end badly for them. Tatsumaki couldn’t sense the energy of the idiot that had been killing all the aliens before she did, but that was probably because he wasn’t fighting at the moment.

To the esper, that was all the more reason to settle the matter. She’d finish these two before her ‘rival’ could even try.

The green-haired girl flew into the hidden passage at full speed, heading towards the presence she knew she could extinguish in one attack. She knew those unidentified enemies needed to be dispatched on the ship quickly, because if they showed up and fought alongside the regenerating monster down below, there would almost certainly be casualties among the S-Class.

After a few minutes of flight along the winding passageways, Tatsumaki found that the mysterious psychic’s energy had skyrocketed, then disappeared. She clicked her tongue. No doubt it was the one who’d left the heaps of corpses a while ago. How a fist-fighter like that had beaten a psychic was beyond her.

Quickly, the esper changed direction, heading towards the other entity she sensed. The energy emanating from it sent a small chill down her spine. She knew she would be able to handle it — there was no monster she couldn’t take down, after all — but there was something… off about it. The energy she sensed seemed not to be the full extent of the creature’s power. It was being restrained somehow. Maybe it was a powerful creature that the aliens were keeping locked up as a last resort.

If a monster like that was set loose in the city below, then there would really be problems.

 

* * *

 

“It seems a suitable appetizer has been brought to me.”

An alien cyclops grinned madly as the throne room’s huge double-doors were thrown open, wrapped in a green glow.

Boros knew the end was nearly at hand, and quite frankly, the wait had become almost unbearable. The man he had seen in the ship’s surveillance system was undoubtedly the man of prophecy — after all, he had dispatched Groribas, one of his strongest men, instantly! His crew of battle-hardened pirates was decimated, and it seemed Geryuganshoop had been felled by him too, not many moments ago.

The alien’s eye gleamed and his chest thrummed with quiet expectation. Although two of his commanders had just been defeated, they had the honor of being killed by the man who was his match. And soon it would be his turn to face him!

In spite of his growing excitement, the alien reminded himself to be steady. Although the prospect of battle was certainly thrilling, and he revelled in the emotions the bald earthling had brought about in him, the one-eyed alien knew misplaced excitement could lead to mistakes.

It was just his luck that there was now a way to release it — and it came in the form of a small esper girl. On the surface, it seemed that she was merely a runt — some underdeveloped creature from the planet that was likely still developing into adulthood. However, the overwhelming energy exuding from the girl spoke otherwise. The Dominator of the Universe thought he had already seen the limits of psychic powers in the planet of his underling, Geryuganshoop. After all, almost a third of his troops were defeated before he was able to grind the tentacle-ridden planet into its place. Among those in the planet’s population, he had come across a particularly powerful psychic in his tentacled servant — whom he’d soundly defeated and pushed to join his band in exchange for his life.

The difference between Geryuganshoop and this small psychic was like night and day. Unlike his faithful attendant, who had been powerful due to his supreme control over the psychic energy he wielded, the small native of Earth felt more like a natural disaster. Her energy swirled around in green hues like the great storms of a gas giant, and it was unlike anything he’d seen before!

The alien could feel his core pulsing excitedly. Although he knew he was stronger, he also knew the coming fight would be far from easy.

“Before we battle, let us exchange names,” the cyclops said, walking down the grand staircase in front of him. “I am Boros, leader of the pirate band known as Dark Matter, and the Dominator of the Universe.”

“I don’t care.”

A wave of psychic energy from the esper’s hands sent the alien flying into one of the throne room’s pillars with a loud BOOM! , sending a large cloud of dust in the air. The explosion echoed around the hall and faded softly to either side.

As the dust settled, Tatsumaki found Boros wedged shallowly into the pillar. He seemed to be incapacitated.

Tatsumaki frowned, bringing her arms down. There was no way that this alien had been knocked out from just that — the energy she sensed before was no joke. Not even a little.

She raised her guard, ready for any sign of movement.

 

Moments later, the one-eyed cyclops freed itself from the alien stone. He dropped onto the ground with a dull thunk , confirming the esper’s suspicions. Boros had survived, but the shadow over his face gave Tatsumaki indication of the damage he sustained. The esper smirked. Apparently she didn’t have anything to worry about, after all. Her psychic wave would have torn apart anything weaker than the strongest of Demon-Level threats and severely damaged anything tougher than that. Since the alien was still standing, then Tatsumaki had no doubt it was a Dragon level threat. Of course, it didn’t matter to Tatsumaki if this ‘Boros’ fellow was a Demon or a Dragon, because the outcome would just be the same.

“What a worthless alien,” the esper muttered. For the commander of a ship that decimated A City, he was surprisingly weak.

“HAHAHAHA!”

Tatsumaki flinched as booming laughter echoed around the room. The shadow over her enemy’s face had disappeared — his slouched posture was gone, too. There was no indication that he had been fazed at all.

“What a powerful psychic attack! If Geryuganshoop was still alive, I’m sure you could have taught him a thing or two.” Boros spoke as if he had not been attacked just moments ago. Large cracks dotted the alien’s armor and the red cape on his back was torn, but his flesh was completely untouched.

“Tch,” the green-haired esper glared at the alien, half in anger and half in shock. Was he toying with her? Did he have the actual gall to hold back against her attack?! 

Questions began to spin in Tatsumaki’s mind, but the esper pushed them away. There was only one thing for certain at the moment: his power was growing by the second. There was no time to waste; she had to ramp things up a bit. 

The throne room rumbled with energy as Tatsumaki’s body was washed with pale green light. Dozens of pillars to either side of Boros crumbled to rubble, pulled by an unseen force toward the esper and gathered around her in a whirlwind. The debris spun faster and faster, causing it to catch flame and melt.

Alight with red-hot magma and whistling with sheer speed, the room was awhirl with a storm not unlike the ones that ravaged Boros’ home planet.

“How nostalgic,” the alien mused.

In a split-second, he was engulfed by the storm. And everything was set ablaze.

 

Chapter 3: Encounters

 

Fiery pieces of rock splattered the walls around the throne room, leaving everything scorched black in its path. In the middle of the room was a charred-orange spiral, smoldering, raw, with heat. At its center, the ground was liquid, bubbling and popping like lava.

The firestorm was enough to melt buildings in mere seconds; any ordinary being caught within it would come out as a pile of ashen dust. But Tatsumaki’s eyes remained fixed to the pillar of smoke billowing at the center of the spiral. A twisted feeling in her gut told her that whatever she was facing right now was no ordinary being.

An incandescent figure rose from the smoke like a demon from hell. The alien had survived her attack, just as Tatsumaki expected — but not without a cost. Boros’ cape had burnt to cinders, and what little remained of his armor was glowing white-hot. The alien’s light blue skin was burned and blistered from the molten storm, and had now turned into an ugly hue of purplish-red.

Tatsumaki scowled. The creature was abnormally resilient. If he was still able to fight after that attack, then she would have to go all-out, putting everyone beneath the ship in danger — and that included any survivors still trapped in the rubble below. Despite her temperament, the esper didn’t want any innocent blood on her hands.

A voice boomed in front of her, cutting off her train of thought.

“What is your name?”

The alien’s tone was different now. The words were delivered with the authority of the being that had crushed entire populations under his feet. The Dominator of the Universe had spoken to her. Asked a question and demanded an answer. 

“Tatsumaki,” the esper said slowly. Her mind was reeling from the… thing… in front of her. That attack was not something one simply stood up from — not even the strongest of Dragon-Level creatures were an exception. To have the strength to speak with such force was more than abnormal.

Tatsumaki let out a deep breath and shook her head. There was no other choice then. The S-Class heroes currently battling under the ship would need to prove their worth very, very soon. Silently, she cursed herself for not bringing a transmitter before going on board.

“Tatsumaki,” the alien spoke once more, satisfied with the answer she had given her. “You have impressed me. When I defeat you, join the Dark Matter Pirates. Seeing as Geryuganshoop has been killed, I may need another subordinate very soon.”

“Sorry, one-eye,” Tatsumaki replied, stifling her rage. “I’m not interested.”

The alien’s smile didn’t waver. “I expected as much. A warrior like you would rather die than submit to anyone, no matter how badly things turned out.”

“Damn right,” the girl said. An idea was slowly forming in her head, but it wasn’t quite complete. Thankfully, the alien seemed to really like to talk, so Tatsumaki humored him. “Say, one-eye — why’d you come here in the first place?”

“I am here searching for someone,” the alien said. “Your world’s strongest fighter.”

That caught the esper’s attention. Her ear twitched.

“There exists a prophecy, you see,” Boros continued. “It states that on this planet, I will encounter a warrior that is my match. That very warrior is currently aboard this ship. He has decimated my troops and will arrive here shortly, as causality wills.”

Tatsumaki’s eyes widened for a moment, trying to put the pieces together. A City had just been destroyed in an instant. A hero had gotten on the ship before her and utterly destroyed the enemies in a single blow. Surely it had to be him… right?

A small spark of hope rose within her as she came to a conclusion, but she snuffed it out, shaking her head.

“It doesn’t matter who this ‘man of prophecy’ is,” the esper said. “Because I’ll beat you myself.”

Boros grinned. It was a shame that the esper had refused his offer. With this much strength and willpower, she would have made a marvelous second-in-command.

“Then,” the alien began. “Let us — eh?”

The ground was shaking. The orb atop the alien’s throne keeping the ship afloat began to glow and flicker.

The esper’s eyes were an incandescent green. Veins were visible around her temple as she strained against the sphere that kept the ship afloat.

 

The city-sized spacecraft was probably the most difficult thing Tatsumaki had ever tried to control. Unlike a regular city, which was relatively easy to mold to her will, the ship was resisting her powers. The damn thing was barely moving! There was some sort of energy keeping the ship buoyant; she just needed to find it.

A few seconds later, she felt it.

Her eyes were drawn toward the orb atop the throne room — it grew brighter as she tried to push it down. The room swelled under surges of energy trying to keep the ship buoyant against her efforts.

The ship shook violently and twice-molten debris flew around the room, blocking the alien’s view. Boros was stunned at the esper’s power. His body felt like it was turning to stone. It was as if he was back on his home planet — an alien child trying to survive the hellish wasteland he was born into. The Dominator of the Universe felt his legs buckle underneath him.

“Astounding,” the alien muttered, a grin spreading wider across his face despite the chaos swirling around him. “Of all the creatures I’ve faced, you are the first to bring me to my knees!”

The alien leader revelled in the feeling of powerlessness. This planet was, quite assuredly, the most interesting little one he had ever visited. He was not only about to face his greatest opponent, but he was also fighting a close second as far as he could tell. And what a fight this was! Maybe twenty years in space had dulled Boros’ instincts just a tad, but the alien wanted to see what the little esper truly had under her sleeves.

The power sphere in the throne room was dangerously fluctuating in energy, however — a power sphere of which they had no replacements aboard and whose destruction would cause the ship to crash, setting off all the weaponry underneath. The alien smiled. Her plan was clever, but had one major flaw: it didn’t consider for him.

“RAGH!”

Boros leapt into the air, emitting a sonic boom that cracked the throne room’s floor. The debris whirling around the esper seared the alien’s flesh, but that was of little consequence to him. In an instant he was face-to-face with the esper, pulling his left arm back for a blow that would end the fight, just as it did with nearly every enemy he’d faced thus far.

 

His fist blew completely off as he punched at the esper, exploding into bits as psychic energy forced him to a stop. The Dominator of the Universe was then sent flying backwards at breakneck speeds, heading towards the power sphere.

In the milliseconds it took to reach the orb, Boros had come to a conclusion. It was clear that there was absolutely no nuance with the esper’s plan. Powerful as she was, her tactical skills were much too blunt. That, combined with her stubborn, overconfident attitude, and in an instant, the path to Boros’ victory was clear.

The alien stifled the impact on the power sphere with his legs and felt the esper begin to pull him back to try again — much more viciously this time around. Boros let out a roar, expelling his own energy, and the psychic’s hold on him broke. The alien landed on his feet with a crash. Harsh purple light began to surround him in a sphere.

 

Boros’ conquest around the galaxy left him with unrivalled combat experience. He had fought thousands of opponents, and he had beaten each one of them using a combination of both sheer power and tactical superiority. Of these opponents, he found those with long-range attacks to be the most difficult to handle. It took Boros a while, but as with all hurdles the alien faced in his conquest, even entire esper civilizations were eventually crushed under his feet.

Overwhelming speed. The enemy’s willpower. And injury to the central hub of the nervous system — in a human’s case, the brain. Tried and true pillars in defeating those with extrasensory powers, and were always to be considered whenever combatting one. All this ran through the alien’s mind in less than a second as he felt power swelling within him, painfully pushing inside his flesh like a volcano about to erupt. Boros knew he had only a few moments before his energy propelled him forward… 

So he aimed straight for the esper’s head.

 

“METEORIC BURST!”

 

* * *

 

Tatsumaki crashed into a wall opposite the throne, utterly unable to react to the alien’s blitz. She gasped as the back of her skull impacted the hard surface; her breath felt hot.

The esper’s vision was distorted, and as she tried to stand, she felt a dizzying sensation that nearly caused her to retch. Not that she could have stood up, anyway; Boros kicked her down the moment she tried.

His leg, pulsing with white energy, felt like a falling boulder smashing against her stomach. The esper winced in pain — it took all she could not to scream as his leg pushed against her cracked ribs. Grimacing, she sent a psychic wave to push the alien off. Her hands glowed faintly, and despite her injuries, the alien was sent back several meters with considerable force. But it came at a cost.

Tatsumaki’s head felt like it was splitting open — as if a knife was being jammed in between her eyes. The glow surrounding her hands disappeared, and she coughed blood. What had this creature done to her?!

Boros’s deep laugh echoed around the chamber.

“To think you were able to put up a barrier, even at that speed! Magnificent!”

The esper gritted her teeth through the pain, trying to form some sort of plan. The situation was getting impossible.

If she called out for help, she would die.

If she let her injuries stop her from moving, she would die.

She wasn’t even sure if she could push him away with her powers. And in her state, what could she do after that? In the end, his fist would eventually strike true. She would be killed.

And if that happened, nothing would stop him from killing everyone else underneath the ship.

“You were strong, Tatsumaki,” the alien boomed, raising the fist that would end her life.

She didn’t close her eyes.

 

Dully, the esper heard the sound of wind, and, an instant later, the impact of Boros’s attack. It came from much too far away, however; her surroundings had changed right before the attack. In her addled state of mind, Tatsumaki took a few seconds to notice. The green-haired girl was being carried in someone’s arms.

A white cape fluttered at the edge of her vision, and she felt a pang of déjà vu.

‘Blast…?’ The esper tried to speak.

‘I don’t need your help,’ she wanted to say. ‘I can handle this.’

“I was late again, huh?” the stranger muttered to himself. The voice wasn’t Blast’s. It was calm, almost relaxed — just like the top-ranked hero. With just the slightest hint of the scathing tone she herself had often used when speaking to others. He took a deep breath to calm himself down and spoke once more. “Nice fight, kid. You can leave the rest to me.”

‘Did he just say kid?!’ If the esper could move, she would have punted him to the sky.

Wait…

Eyes widening, Tatsumaki realized that she knew this utter fool. This was the hero she saw during the meeting right before the invasion. He was a B-Class nobody! And he thought he could take on the alien by himself?!

“Don’t be stupid…” Despite her injuries, she forced herself to speak. “I’ll… beat him… myself…”

Saitama laid her down on the ground. And the esper found that she could not, for the life of her, get back up.

 

“You have defeated my subordinates most splendidly!” Boros smiled, teeth sharp as blades. His white form flickered out, and his skin was back to its regular navy hue. It seemed he had all but forgotten about the green-haired esper; his attention was now fixed solely on what he believed to be his greatest challenger yet. “Before we fight, tell me your name.”

“I’m a hero for fu— I mean, ehrm, I’m the professional hero Saitama,” the caped baldy began. His eyes were lidded, his tone accusatory. “I don’t know what you want, but you wrecked City A, didn’t you?”

“Indeed. And as for what I want…” A shadow spread across Boros’s face. “You see, there exists a prophecy…”

The sound of their speaking droned on in Tatsumaki’s ear. She grunted in pain as she felt her broken ribs creak against themselves. Using what remained of her psychic powers, she aligned them, resigning herself to the searing pain of feeling fractured bone against fractured bone — not to mention the nearly vomit-inducing headache that lit the inside of her skull on fire. This B-Class hero was just stalling for time, she knew. She had to be able to fight as soon as possible.

It was a good thing the alien conqueror had been prattling on without paying attention to her muted screams of agony.

“… So come! Give stimulation to my existence!”

 

BAM!

 

Boros flew into what remained of a pillar, reducing the already battered column into dust. He looked completely taken off-guard.

“Are you stupid?” Saitama asked, fist smoking. “You can’t go around conquering planets just because you’re bored. Even fanfiction authors wouldn’t do that.” He thought about it for a bit. “Well, actually—”

Tatsumaki could hear an audible “Oh?” of surprise from Saitama as Boros picked himself off the rubble.

“I see,” Boros said, deep in thought. “It seems I have to go all-out from the start. You shall now bear witness to my immeasurable, irresistible power.”

It was Saitama’s turn to look thoughtful.

“Ok.”

 

Notes:

And that's the end of the third chapter!! Thank you so much for reading this far, and I hope you look forward to more development and art!!

I've never posted on ao3 before, so please forgive any rookie mistakes I make while trying to work this website out. Speaking of: there are supposed to be 2 sets of art per chapter, the cover art (in the beginning of the chapter) and the bonus doodles (at the end of the chapter). Please inform me if some of them aren't showing up!

Stay warm, everyone! Happy summer!

-bb

Chapter 4: The Esper's Pride

 

Tatsumaki clicked her tongue as she mulled to herself, trying to keep her mind off of the pain-filled tremors in her body. If she was at her full power, there was no doubt she could keep up with the two. Hell, she bet she could even fly circles around them!

As she was now, though, that wasn’t happening. Because of her carelessness, she allowed the situation to get as dire as it was at the present. Injured as she was, the fighting pair were blurs to her eyes. The sounds of their impact and the trail of destruction they left as they clashed were Tatsumaki’s only clues as to where the two were.

‘The baldy can keep up,’ she thought, brows furrowed. ‘But if that monster goes into his glowing white form, he’ll die.’

Thanks to the alien’s insistence on showboating to the useless B-Class, Tatsumaki had time to come up with a plan. She needed a way to catch Boros off guard and kill him before he could transform.

The esper forced herself to stand, stumbling slightly without any support to hold on to. Steadying herself as she got on her feet, Tatsumaki quietly cursed the baldy who placed her smack in the middle of the throne room, strewn with rubbles as it was. She walked carefully in the direction of the ensuing brawl, eyes not missing the increasing destruction of the room as the two fought. The pillars that somehow managed to remain standing after Tatsumaki’s previous attack were now nothing but dust as Boros and Saitama clashed. They left nothing in their wake save for smoke and molten stone.

Tatsumaki’s steps grew more confident, but she was forced to keep the pace at a crawl. Red-hot debris dotted the ground — Boros had just drop-kicked the baldy into a column, blasting the both of them through it in an explosion of magma. She had to believe that the B-Class baldy could survive that, though she highly doubted it. The esper decided that it would be best to take cover under whatever she could find that was left standing. If the baldy had bitten the dust, she needed to stay hidden and strike as quickly as possible.

Making her way to an upturned piece of ship that had been sent flying by the raging battle, an ear-ringingly loud crash from above made the esper flinch. Looking over to the sound, Tatsumaki found a gaping hole formed in the throne room’s ceiling. Light streamed from it and the sounds of distant clashing could be heard. The B-Class was still fighting. 

“Heh.” Despite him cutting her fight off midway, she had to respect the baldy’s spunk.

Tatsumaki allowed herself a moment to rest as she settled under the circle of sunlight. She took a few deep breaths, settling the adrenaline rushing through her. Even chuckling to herself was painful. Her body felt like stone. It was telling Tatsumaki that she was at her absolute limit, that she couldn’t — shouldn’t — push herself further.

As if to further convince the esper that it was a bad idea to continue fighting, a blast of fire scorched the top of the ship, singeing the esper’s collar and sleeves. The ceiling turned red-hot and the edges of the hole bubbled and popped. Everything above was covered in smoke.

Ignoring the obvious danger going up there posed, an instinctive thought entered Tatsumaki’s mind.

‘He could blast FIRE?! Did that alien really hold back against me?!’ The esper felt heat flow through her. ‘How DARE that one-eyed freak!!’

Power temporarily renewed by a rush of pride, anger and sheer will, a green aura flickered around Tatsumaki. She flew up through the still-boiling hole and into the fog.

BOOM!!

The green-haired esper shielded her face as a blast of wind blew across the rooftop, dissipating every last trace of smoke on the battlefield. Looking over to the source of the sound, she saw the B-Class hero standing in a daze. Had he been hit?

Boros was speaking loudly about how his race was far superior to the human species, being given the ability to self-heal and yada, yada, yada. Tatsumaki’s mind was focused more on how long it would take before she had enough power to snap the alien’s neck. Judging by her turbulent control of her flight at the moment, she guessed that it would take around five minutes.

Boros’ booming voice was interrupted by the baldy’s. Tatsumaki couldn’t hear his words, but they seemed to enrage the alien. She took a step back as Boros surrounded himself in a sphere of white energy. This was it. The B-Class needed to run away and stave off the alien’s attack for as long as he coul—

The baldy was just standing there. Was he stupid?!

But of course he wouldn’t have known about it. That was why the alien had saved the attack for this long. Boros wanted to end things right then and there.

Inwardly, Tatsumaki cursed, watching the searing light grow brighter. She didn’t have enough time!

In anticipation of Boros’ attack, the esper threw out her hands and pinned the alien with all the psychic energy she could muster. Her head pounded. Why wasn’t the baldy doing anything?

“MOVE!!” Tatsumaki screamed. The ground around Boros sagged down under her power. Saitama didn’t seem to hear, idly watching as the alien aimed directly for him.

“METEORIC BURST!!”

The esper’s hold on Boros was broken in an instant, and the baldy disappeared from where he was standing.

Tatsumaki was blown back by Boros’ attack as well. Barely able to put up a barrier in time, the ship liquified around her. Sensing multiple alien henchmen inside the ship vanish, she realized that the alien had abandoned all control.

Peering through the smoke, the green-haired girl couldn’t see the two at all. The only thing she felt was impact after impact, seemingly coming from every part of the ship at once, shaking the ground beneath her. Inside her barrier, the esper tried — and failed — to stifle the alien’s attacks on the B-Class using the surrounding rubble as cushions to soften momentum. But her barrage of debris wasn’t strong enough; the pieces of alien metal simply melted as soon as they were exposed to the aura surrounding Boros. Relying only on her energy-sensing capabilities for vision didn’t help, either. In her present state, Tatsumaki would have been better off just throwing attacks at random.

After several more scorching moments of fighting, a loud crash from above caused the city-sized ship to rumble dizzyingly, dispersing the smoke and flames around Tatsumaki. For a brief moment, the esper saw a pillar of light pierce the sky, and she could no longer sense a trace of the B-Class hero.

 

Boros’ chest rose and fell as he looked at the deep blue above him. It didn’t take him long to hunch over, grabbing his chest in pain.

Tatsumaki steeled herself. The B-Class had bought her enough time. He wouldn’t be dying in vain.

This was her chance.

The esper raised her arms, commanding several thousand pieces of the ship to obey her will. Realizing they were near-liquid and easy to manipulate, she flicked her finger — bathing the rubble in emerald light. The stones transformed, writhing in the air like eerie black rain, they warped and turned needle-like. Boros looked around, not comprehending.

Several sharp stabs of pain shot through Tatsumaki’s head, but she ignored it. Boros took a stance to guard himself, but the spears were already upon him.

 

Thousands upon thousands of blades screamed, whistling toward the alien commander faster than the speed of sound. They smashed into the ship’s hull, the sickening scraping of metal upon metal cutting through the air. The barrage seemed to be unending.

Tatsumaki gnashed her teeth as another spike of pain shot through her skull. Her head was bleeding, but she had to keep the attack up for as long as possib—

A plane crash of a punch sent the esper flying, sucking the air out of her lungs. She crashed into the ground several dozen meters away, coughing up blood.

“You… did you think you could catch me… by surprise?” Boros rumbled quietly, taking his time to walk up to the girl. His body was covered with needles, which were slowly melting from his skin. He bled viscous alien blood.

Boros’ shadow loomed ominously over her.

"Rrrahhh!" Tatsumaki used the last of her power to envelop the alien’s head in a ring of energy, tight as a vice. And she twisted.

“Ngh!” Boros’ head turned sharply to the right like a puppet’s, his neck muscles being pulled like rubber. Tatsumaki could feel his exhaustion — his resistance to her powers was getting weaker and weaker. She was so close… if she could withstand the pain… if she could just keep her arms from dropping…

The alien slammed his hand onto her throat, breaking the esper’s grip in an instant.

“I grow sick of you!” Boros roared, snapping his head back fiercely. He raised her up with one arm and stared into her eyes. Barely conscious, the esper stared back. She felt as if she was looking at pure power. “A runt should learn when to flee,” he said, gripping tighter. The esper gasped in pain. “This unfounded stubbornness will be your demise !”

In the corner of her eye, Tatsumaki saw a yellow-white flash blast through the sky. It collided with the ship and exploded behind Boros. The entire ground shook with the strength of the impact.

Turning to face the noise, the alien dropped Tatsumaki with a thud, looking surprised. The green-haired girl felt the ship list sharply, and she slid helplessly down against a nearby wall.

‘Metal Knight…?’ she thought dully, trying to put the pieces together. ‘Did that dumb slacker finally decide to show up?’

The esper’s eyes widened as a figure walked out of the smoke, clad in ridiculous yellow and red. A certain bald B-Class hero had just returned from the dead. And with a stupid grin on his face to boot.

“Ah, I made it,” Saitama said looking around. His eye caught a hint of green hair behind the alien and he turned worried. “H-hey, are you—?”

With a roar of joy, the Dominator of the Universe rushed toward the hero, using sheer speed to force the baldy to defend.

Tatsumaki could do nothing but watch the alien begin his barrage anew, smashing into the hero seemingly everywhere at once, leaving no room for counterattack.

The sound of Saitama’s single punch rang through louder than any of Boros’ ground-shaking blows. The alien was sent hurtling back past the esper, only managing to catch himself after flying several dozen meters. Spitting out blood, Boros grinned.

“That’s it Saitama!” he said. “You are indeed a man worth defeati—”

“Consecutive Normal Punches.”

The alien was turned into mincemeat.

But only for a second.

Quickly, and much to Tatsumaki's surprise, the alien quite literally pulled himself together — with the sickening sound of meat and bone gnashing into each other.

Lightning began to flash around Boros' body, and he yelled in rage. Light cascaded down in waves, scorching the ground it touched — and a pillar of lightning came racing toward her.

Saitama jumped in front of Tatsumaki, blocking a bolt of energy that would have burnt the esper to ash.

“I WILL DEFEAT YOU!” roared the Dominator of the Universe, jumping to the sky. “I’LL RELEASE ALL MY ENERGY, BLASTING YOU — AND THIS PLANET — TO OBLIVION!!!”

The attack was like a star had appeared in the sky above A City — there was no other way to describe it. The esper, even almost completely drained of psychic capabilities, could sense Boros’ energy piling up exponentially. After mere moments, she didn’t need her powers to sense the heat, the light, the energy, build and scorch the very air itself. His claim that the attack could destroy the planet wasn’t a bluff, he was here to end everything .

‘How had it come to this?’ Tatsumaki cursed. If she’d not let her guard down… if she had just killed Boros before he could transform, this nightmare scenario would never have taken place.

Using her feelings of frustration as leverage for power, Tatsumaki used the last of her strength to try to at least redirect the blast.

“COLLAPSING STAR, ROARING CANNON!!!”

The alien’s attack ripped the atoms of the air apart — and try as she might, the white-hot beam barely budged under her power’s influence.

It was over.

 

* * *

 

In a quiet, personal room in the Fubuki Group headquarters, a raven-haired esper was watching a small television set in a daze. The news was on, and all broadcasts pointed to the immense ship that loomed above the city. Reporters rattled on about the situation, detailing the heroes sent to meet the enemy as well as those sent out to rescue any survivors. Surges of static popped up here and there as the energy emanating from the floating spacecraft spiked. Nevertheless, the reporters pushed through.

“… According to S-Class Rank 5 Child Emperor, the ship has been almost completely silent as of a few minutes ago. Partially, he states that it is due to S-Class Rank 2 Tatsumaki’s disabling of the ship’s ground cannons, but he worries that there may be another reason behind it. Further updates will come.”

The camera cut to a close-up featuring the young S-Class prodigy, frantically sipping orange juice and typing quickly on his laptop. His screen was too bright to be readable, but the flashing red was definitely not a good sign. He clicked his tongue and looked to the roof of the listing ship, which had been flashing with fire and light nonstop for the past few minutes.

The screen returned to the female reporter, who had just received news on the happenings beneath the ship. Child Emperor carried on typing in the background.

“Near the center of City A’s ruins, the S-Class heroes Silverfang, Atomic Samurai, Metal Bat, and Puri Puri Prisoner have defeated a Dragon-Level threat! They have reported that it seems to be the only ground troop the aliens have sent out, and are now discussing amongst one another about how to bring the ship down.”

Fubuki frowned as the reporter listed the heroes present. Tatsumaki had gone to the meeting hours ago — she should have been one of the first ones to react when the spaceship attacked, and was an indispensable force to help bring any enemies down. So why hadn’t they mentioned her name?

Cold crept up the B-Class esper’s spine as she realized what her sister had probably done. And the news reporter confirmed just that mere moments later.

“It seems that the S-Class hero Tornado of Terror entered the ship alone around half an hour ago. None of the S-Class have been able to communicate with her since then, but rest assured, we must believe that our Rank 2 hero will defeat the ene—”

Child Emperor practically threw his laptop in the air, screaming to the S-Class in the distance. “IT’S GONNA BLOW!”

In her head, the raven-haired esper heard her sister speak telepathically. Tatsumaki’s voice was barely a whisper, and Fubuki’s heart dropped to her stomach, unable to believe what her older sister had just said.

‘Fubuki, I’m sorry.’

On the small screen, Fubuki watched as the top of the ship exploded, and for a few moments, it was as if the bright lights of heaven had appeared in City A. Brilliant ribbons of blue, gold, and that pure, searing white filled the sky above, screaming a song of rebirth.

The screen turned into static.

Members of the Fubuki Group burst her office door open, clamoring over one another in an attempt to talk to their leader.

“Miss Fubuki, are you—?!”

“Fubuki-san, we—!!”

“Do you want us to head to City A, ma’am?!”

They chattered on, but the B-Class esper didn’t respond.

 

Fubuki was in shock. That was the first time her sister had ever apologized to her.

Was it really going to be the last?

 

* * *

 

Tatsumaki’s first waking moments were spent wondering why the afterlife was so painful.

Quiet, yes. Pleasantly windy and eerily calm, definitely.

But the dull stabbing in her ribs and skull that quickly grew unbearable reminded her that this wasn’t the end for her yet.

Forcing her eyes to take in what had just happened, the esper could barely believe what she saw.

The sky was split in half, the deafening thrum of lightning had ceased, and the alien was on the floor, unmoving. Unbelievably — impossibly — the fight was over.

The baldy somehow broke through an attack that would have wiped out humanity.

The baldy somehow forced the Dominator of the Universe to fall to the ground, half of his regenerating body burnt to nothingness.

There was no cheering, no fanfare, no celebration from Saitama. The man who had saved the world just stood there, quiet, his cape dancing in the breeze. For a brief moment, she had a vision of years long past — of another white-caped hero that gave her another chance to live. And then the vision faded to black.

 

“I… I feel nothing. Did I… lose…?” Boros was the first to break the silence. His skin was charred gray, and his hair was a pale pink. But even at death’s door, the alien’s voice echoed with dignity.

Saitama looked over at his foe.

“You’re still conscious,” the hero said quietly. “You really are strong.”

“… The prophecy held true,” Boros replied. “The battle was… hard-fought.”

The wind whistled.

“Yeah…” Saitama breathed.

Boros smiled to himself. He had not expected the planet’s finest warrior to be so… odd . “It seems… we are different in that way as well.”

Saitama raised an eyebrow. “In what way?”

“Lying,” the alien said knowingly. It was then that Boros decided — he would not die in delusion. “Try as I might… you still had strength to spare. I… didn’t stand a chance. It wasn’t even a battle.”

The hero didn’t respond.

“So much for prophecies, huh?” Boros chuckled weakly.  “You’re far too strong…

“Saitama…”

As life drained from his body, the alien sighed. A weight had been lifted, and the Dominator of the Universe passed on a crushing truth to the hero standing before him. It was a truth he would not wish upon his worst enemy, but it seemed to have been passed on to a strange sort of friend. It was different if it was that man — someone who would lie for the sake of others, instead of for himself. Maybe he would do better?

All the felled Dominator of the Universe knew now was that he was free — and that this warrior was the one who freed him.

Boros died before he could say thank you.

 

‘Is he coming over to gloat?’ Tatsumaki thought as Saitama walked over to her. 

There was a shadow over his face, but his expression was completely blank. Try as she might, the esper couldn’t tell at all what was going through the man’s head.

‘Go ahead, brag — laugh!’ she said in her head. ‘Tch. The one time I fail, and this man has to be the one to see it.’

Readying herself for scathing words, she was taken totally off guard as Saitama picked her up with surprising care, so as to not burden the esper’s injured body.

Tatsumaki looked at Saitama’s face, trying once more to look past the shadows cast on his eyes. His exchange with Boros was probably still fresh in his mind, and the distant look he had practically proved it. Based on the alien’s propensity to blather on and on, he had probably said something that stuck with the caped hero.

“The ship’s about to crash. Hold on,” he said, cutting the esper’s train of thought. Tatsumaki looked at him, again trying to pry open into his head. But it seemed utterly and hopelessly sealed shut — but the esper wasn’t the greatest at reading people, anyway. Wasting any more energy on the matter was worthless, she decided, and let herself relax in the man’s arms.

As Saitama thought about what he’d make for dinner, the ship shook roughly — had it finally begun to crash? Tatsumaki lurched sideways, not feeling confident in the baldy’s hold on her. She tried repositioning herself.

It kind of worked. Just for a little while, though.

The tremors around the ship grew stronger, and try as the baldy might to keep her steady in a cradle-carry, Tatsumaki grew more and more uncomfortable.

She turned towards Saitama and held his arm.

‘Ah, that’s a little better.’

 

The hero was surprised at how soft the esper’s grip was.

 

Chapter 5: Shipside

 

The ship rumbled gently as the last of its damaged hull touched down on A City. The shaking had finally stopped.

Saitama peered over the edge. It was around a fifty-or-so meter drop. He shrugged. Not too bad. He just hoped his already-shredded cape wouldn’t get caught on any jutting metal pieces on the way down — and now that he mentioned it, it probably would. But capes were of little consequence, anyway. His priority was to ensure the esper’s safety.

The bald man took a breath as he stepped to the side of the ship.

“Here goes nothing,” Saitama muttered, holding the esper closer in his arms.

Leg half-raised and ready to jump down, the hero felt a tug on his sleeve.

“Oi… baldy,” Tatsumaki said weakly.

“The name’s Saitama,” he replied, frowning at the nickname. “What do you want? Are you afraid of heights?”

If the esper had the energy to scoff, she would have. “Of course not! Le… ah… let me down.”

“Uh, okay.” Shrugging, the bald man placed the esper down on the ground beside him. 

The alien’s attack was still burned into her vision. His grip on her throat seared like molten iron.

‘I failed,’ Tatsumaki thought, chest tightening painfully. ‘That alien took me off guard. I… I didn’t even have the strength to see how it ended. Did this guy really…?’

She looked over to Saitama — who was picking his nose. He was muttering something to himself, something like ‘scrambled eggs and rice?’ The esper couldn’t look away faster if she tried.

‘God help me,’ Tatsumaki said, looking up to the sky. ‘I can’t believe that idiot saw me like this. If he tells the others about how I couldn’t face up to that alien freak, it doesn’t matter how strong he is — I swear I’ll kill him!’ The esper calmed herself. ‘Right now, though… the only important thing is,’ Standing up shakily, the esper tried to call on her powers. ‘I have to get out of here.’

Tatsumaki’s form flickered green, but her body wouldn’t allow for any more than that.

“Ghh!”

The esper’s head pounded, blood trickling down her face.

Drip… drip… drip.

It… it wasn’t stopping.

“Ah…!” The esper clutched her forehead, suddenly feeling lightheaded. Her body forced her to fall onto the floor.

She’d gone too far. Pushing one’s powers when they were completely drained was something an esper should never do. After Boros’ first punch, she could definitely feel her hold on her powers getting weaker. Now she was completely and utterly spent. The bastard had practically crippled her powers in a single attack. Even dead, he’d left her powerless — what a sick joke. The esper wiped her head furiously with her left arm’s sleeve.

A cloth wrapped around Tatsumaki’s forehead.

The esper flinched — sending a stab of pain into her head — and turned around, scowling. The B-Class hero looked back at her, ripped cape in hand.

“What… do you think you’re doing, baldy?” said the esper.

“Blindfolding you so I can take you somewhere sketchy,” replied Saitama, straight-faced.

Tatsumaki was either not amused or didn’t think that was a joke at all. Or both. She gave him the nastiest look he’d ever seen.

“I, uh, thought that would make you calm down. I was kidding. Here,” he knelt over beside her, tightening the cloth and tying it in a ribbon. Blood seeped into it for a moment, but eventually the slow trickling ceased. “There you go.”

“Just… stop,” Tatsumaki said, touching the fabric on her forehead. “I don’t need your help. I don’t… want anything to do with you.”

“Same here,” said Saitama. “The sooner you let me get you down, the sooner we can have nothing to do with each other.”

That made sense, it really did — but the esper wasn’t happy about it in the slightest.

“Fine,” she said. “Make it quick.”

Saitama carried her again.

“Here we go then,” he said. And jumped.

 

“Sensei!”

The cyborg made his way to Saitama, who had managed to get half his body stuck in the ground. The rubble wasn’t as hard as he thought it would be. Not even close. Luckily, he managed to get the little esper out of the way before he hit the ground. As it was, he was holding her above his head like she was some kind of prize fish he’d just caught.

Genos was trying to pull him up by his belt, but Saitama wouldn’t budge.

‘Kill me,’ Tatsumaki said, feeling the baldy try wiggling out in rhythm to the cyborg’s pulling. The S-Class and the B-Class were a perfect pair in the worst way possible.

“You can… put me down, you know…” she said, her pain not lessening the annoyance in her tone.

Saitama looked as if the esper had just solved the mysteries of the universe. “Ohhhhhhh!”

Tatsumaki rolled her eyes.

Saitama carefully set the green-haired girl down and pulled himself out of the ground. Genos, who had been waiting for his master to come out of the ship for the past few minutes, talked to him with anxiety-ridden vigor. Tatsumaki sat down, resigning herself to listen to their conversation. Her legs still couldn’t support her weight.

“Sensei! You’re unharmed!” Genos noted, looking at Saitama up and down.

“Yeah, the situation’s pretty much handled,” the baldy said.

“Were you the cause of the explosion up there?” Genos pointed towards the ship.

“Eh, kinda,” said Saitama. He gestured upward with his thumb. “There was someone really strong up there. I just kinda deflected his attack.”

“I see, sensei,” Genos lowered his hand and touched his chin. “My sensors couldn’t properly calculate the limits of that explosion’s energy. Does this mean that you’ve beaten the enemy that would have brought about the prophesied ‘trouble’ towards the Earth?”

“Nah.” It was Saitama’s turn to look thoughtful. Boros had spoken of a prophecy, too, and it seemed that his oracle had lied about it being a matched fight. “Turns out, prophecies can’t be trusted.”

“Oh… I see, sensei!” Genos brought out a notebook, quickly jotting down notes. After a few seconds, he paused. “Ah, master. By the way,” the cyborg gestured to the injured esper. “What happened to her?”

Saitama shrugged. “Dunno. The kid got hurt before I got there. What do you think we should do about her?”

“I’m here , you know,” said Tatsumaki, choosing to overlook the bald man’s ‘kid’ insult. The esper’s tendency to be ignored had always been a sore spot. She pointed a finger at Saitama. “And just to clear things up, I didn’t need your help there. I could’ve beaten him myself.” 

“We should bring her to the nearest hospital, sensei,” Genos answered Saitama, speaking over the esper’s last statement. “With her injuries, it would not be recommended to just let her be.”

“Makes sense,” the baldy said. “Where’s the nearest one?”

“Oi!” the esper shouted. “Are you two deaf?!”

“Let’s see,” Genos began. His pupils flashed with little lights as they surveyed possible locations to bring the esper to. “The nearest hospitals are in City B, but my recommendation is to head to M-City instead. It is large and relatively safe, since the S-Class King’s presence is enough to keep crime at bay. I worry that the hospitals may be full, though. If it comes down to it, sensei, I will personally evict those with lesser injuries! Those with minor bruises and scrapes will be forced away!”

“He—llo—!?” Tatsumaki called.

“No, don’t do that!” said Saitama hurriedly. “But, uh, City M, huh? That’s kinda… far.”

“Is it?” Genos asked. “If you are not satisfied with my recommendation, I will recalibrate my search based on a straight-line path to our apartment in Z-City. Would that be better for you, master?”

“HEY!!” Tatsumaki stood up before Saitama could say anything, grabbing the baldy’s ripped-up cape and pulling it. She ignored the wave of nausea that hit her, but stumbled as her legs shook. “L-listen here!”

Genos did not take lightly to her ‘attack’ on his master. He placed an arm between the two. “Do not harass sensei!”

“Shut up, small fry. This has nothing… ahh… nothing to do with you!” Tatsumaki placed a hand on her ribs, quickly running out of energy to argue. With difficulty, she pointed at Saitama. “I'm not going to a hospital, you hear me?”

The baldy frowned, waving for his disciple to lay off the arm-blocking pose. “But you need a doctor.”

“I’m fine . I just need you to take me home and leave me b—”

Home. Her home in A-City . The city that had just gotten demolished by Boros’ ship. She had nowhere to go.

‘Dammit…!’ Tatsumaki sat back down.

“Hey, are you sure you’re okay?” Saitama asked.

Pretending not to hear, the esper shut her eyes tight.

“Yo,” Saitama waved a hand in front of Tatsumaki. “You still with us?”

“Shh!” The esper slapped his hand away. To her displeasure, it barely moved. “Let me think!”

Saitama shrugged, turning to Genos. The baldy brought something up about egg and rice, and their stupid conversation began once more.

At least they had the decency to move a little further away.

 

* * *

 

The S-Class Rank 3 hero Silverfang pounded his back the third time that day, trying to beat the pain out of it.

‘I’m getting older by the day,’ he noted with resignation. Prolonged fights like the one with the regenerating alien would be dangerous if they kept coming up again in the next few months, he knew. In his present state, he could probably only beat Dragon-level threats after he did his daily stretching. Anything before that, and he would definitely get something pulled. In-battle cramps were horrendous for keeping form.

“Haah,” Bang breathed, finally able to vanquish his lower back ache. “I should probably do more full-body workouts.”

The old martial artist was currently walking around the perimeter of the ship, deciding to follow the young cyborg that had removed himself from the other, arguing heroes around the ship. He knew that in time, he would catch up to Genos — and in turn, he would meet up with Saitama. The two, aside from being amazingly powerful, were better company than many of the hot-headed men — and one woman — he knew.

He also wasn’t giving up on getting them to become his pupils, not in the slightest. Perhaps his performance would convince Genos to take up some martial arts. And in turn, Saitama would study under him too. Oh, how strong they would become!

His backache had been completely forgotten by the time he’d arrived at his destination.

Stepping carefully around the uneven ground, Bang heard the familiar voices of the two rookie heroes grow louder. As he turned a corner he saw them standing idly, Genos pointing accusingly at Saitama’s glove. The hero was making his thumb detach from the joint using ‘magic,’ it seemed, and Genos could not understand how he was doing it.

Before he could chuckle at the silly scene, Bang’s instincts rapped gently in his subconscious. There was another presence nearby, he realized. The battle-hardened man tried to place it immediately. Surveying the clusters of debris around him, he spotted a small esper, nearly camouflaged in the rubble near the ship. That was odd. She was never one to use her feet to get from place to place — much less deactivate them in order to sit down on the ground.

The old hero’s eyes turned wide as he walked closer. She was bleeding from the head and neck, and had moderate burns around her entire body. Her arms were crossed, pressing against her ribs, and her eyes were closed shut.

“Tatsumaki!” Bang called out, jumping gracefully over to the small esper. “Are you—!”

“Oh, hey Bang! Hey!” Before he could finish, Saitama called out, jogging over to him. The caped hero put a finger over his mouth, signing for silence. “Shhh…”

Bang looked at him, not quite understanding the reasoning behind the baldy’s action. Nonetheless, he respected the man enough to keep his voice at a whisper. “Saitama, did you not notice Tatsumaki lying injured over here?”

“Ah, about that,” the bald man said, whispering back. “I don’t think she wants to be around people right now. She said she was ‘thinking’ and slapped my hand away.”

Bang frowned again. Saitama led him a little further from the esper so they could speak normally.

“Young Saitama, she’s injured,” Bang began after a few steps. “As a hero, you should not ignore someone who is hurt, no matter what they might say. We must bring her to a hospital right away.”

Saitama nodded. “You say that, but little miss hero over there seems to really be against the idea. Besides, she can actually stand — and shout in my ear — if you can believe it.”

Bang twiddled his moustache. After being around Saitama, he learned that despite how lazily the bald man seemed to act, if someone was truly in danger, he would not hesitate to take action.

“If both you and her say so, then I suppose the situation isn’t as bad as it seems,” Bang said. “But still, let me try talking her out of it. No matter how you put it, not seeking medical help seems… unwise.”

“We’ll find a way, but sure — if you can,” Saitama shrugged as Bang began to make his way towards the esper. 

Turning quickly back over to Genos, the strongest man ‘pulled’ his thumb off and laughed as the blonde cyborg stared at him, trying to analyze the scene with his A.I. assisted sight.

 

Tatsumaki groaned inwardly as she heard Bang make his way toward her. The esper had a lot of respect for the rank 3 hero — that was why she really didn’t want to argue with him — but if worse came to worst, she would definitely do it.

“I know what you’re going to say,” Tatsumaki said weakly as the old martial artist sat down in front of her. “And I’m telling you, I’m fine.”

“Tatsumaki, be reasonable,” said Bang. He knew that dealing with the stubborn type required a gentler approach. “Being injured is a part of a hero’s everyday life — and so is getting proper treatments for any of those injuries. People are worried about you. You should show them that you’re safe.”

“I don’t care,” the esper said, not meeting his eyes. “I’m not going.”

“Hmm? Why?”

Tatsumaki stayed quiet.

Bang sighed. There was a difference between being stubborn and being stupidly so, and it seemed that a majority of the S-Class were part of the latter. There must have been some reason for Tatsumaki to loathe the idea of being in a medical facility, but it was not his business to peer too deeply into it. Maybe it was his old age getting to him, but he relented.

“If you believe in yourself with such diligence, then there’s nothing I can say to change your mind,” Bang said. “But take some advice from an old man who’s made more mistakes than he can count: choosing to be alone when you need help is the worst thing you can do.”

The old martial artist stood up, exchanged a few words with Saitama and Genos, patted their shoulders and headed off. Tatsumaki was left to her own thoughts.

“I don’t need help,” the esper muttered, fighting past the aching pain all over her body — and the urge to close her eyes and succumb to her exhaustion.

“I don’t need help,” she whispered to herself once more, like a mantra.

That time, she only half-meant it.

 

After a few minutes, Saitama walked over to the esper, who was still sitting against the rubble of the ship.

“C’mon. We’re going,” he said. “I’m hungry and you’re hurt. Sitting there on the ground isn’t doing much for either of us.”

The esper glared ice at him. “I told you, I’m not letting you carry me to any of your stupid M-City hospitals!”

Saitama tilted his head — she knew exactly what he was gonna say next.

“Or any other city’s hospitals, either!” she spat.

Sighing, Saitama sat down beside the small esper. He adjusted the rocks to get more comfortable. “Then where are we going, huh? Tell me.”

Tatsumaki didn’t reply.

“You got a house?” Saitama suggested. “I could drop you off, maybe have Genos take a look at your wounds.”

“I lived here,” replied Tatsumaki. She sounded annoyed.

“Ah,” Saitama said. He had half a mind to ask if she lived on the ship, but he quickly realized that she meant ‘here’ as in… the ruins of A-City. “Then, does anyone you know live nearby?”

The esper didn’t respond.

“Does anyone you know live… far- by?” he asked.

Again, silence.

“Family?” the bald man suggested, getting impatient.

Tatsumaki looked away from him.

“Oi. If you aren’t gonna reply, then we’re gonna be here all day,” Saitama said. “Aren’t you hungry?”

No response. The bald man’s eye twitched. Had she suddenly become mute?

“Hey,” he began, frowning. “Answer me.”

The wind howled through the destroyed ship. Dust danced in the air. Tatsumaki refused to reply.

Feeling a twinge of annoyance, Saitama opened his mouth to snap at the stubborn girl.

Thankfully, a certain old martial artist seemed to have known what would happen minutes before it actually did. His words rang inside the man’s bald head.

‘Be patient with her,’ Bang had said to the two heroes before walking off. ‘She isn’t used to needing help.’

Sighing, the bald man closed his eyes and sat there with the esper for a few minutes.

 

* * *

 

“Why… don’t you just… leave?” Tatsumaki started. Her voice had gotten even weaker. “Why are you… so dead-set on helping me?”

“You’re obviously hurt,” Saitama said, keeping his eyes closed. “Even if you say you’re fine, I can tell you won’t be able to walk if you try.”

“… You’re really annoying… you know that?”

“Same goes for you, kid.”

“I… I told you… I’m not a kid!” Tatsumaki said, coughing after the exclamation.

“Well you’re acting like one,” Saitama said, opening his eyes and rolling them. He looked at her. “So, have you decided where to go yet? You didn’t answer any of my questions a while ago.”

“No,” she replied. “I don’t have anywhere to go.”

Saitama looked unimpressed. “You know, Genos talked to me about your sister. Fuyu — Futon — no, uhh, Fubuki?” Tatsumaki’s ear twitched. “Why don’t we take you to her?”

“Definitely not!” The esper’s reply was a little too quick.

“But—”

“No way are you bringing me to her, you understand me?!”

Saitama groaned. “ No this, no that — I can’t believe this…”

The bald man stood up muttering, and walked off.

‘He’s finally left,’ Tatsumaki thought to herself. She wasn’t sure whether to be happy or disappointed — and she hated the fact that she was even considering feeling the latter. ‘I can get some peace and quiet here, then make my way to wherever no one will see me after I can walk again.’

She felt a small wave of heat in front of her.

“Yes, sensei!” the girl heard a distant voice say. Looking over, she saw Genos blast into the distance, propelled by powerful jets of fire on his shoulders. He seemed to be in a hurry.

The baldy, on the other hand, was still there. Scratching his head in the distance, the esper watched him turn and walk back over to her.

“What are you doing… baldy?” she asked, frowning.

“If you’ve really got nowhere to go, then,” the bald man started, honestly not believing what he was about to say. “Then… you can stay with us for a bit.”

“With you…?” Tatsumaki frowned.

“Yep,” Saitama said, looking dead inside. He dreaded the idea of another person staying in his already-cramped apartment. “With me… and Genos… and all of our stuff…”

“Hmm,” the esper ignored his muttering.

If it was anyone else, the esper would have scoffed and turned them down immediately.

But it was him asking.

And she was thinking about it. An emotionless, utterly unreadable baldy she hadn’t even heard of before that day had just asked her if she wanted to stay over, and she was actually thinking about it!

After a few more minutes of thinking on the esper’s part, and a few more minutes of foot-tapping and stomach-grumbling on the baldy’s, Tatsumaki had reached a conclusion. Why exactly she had come to that conclusion was a mix of intrigue and simple necessity, but it wasn’t to say she didn’t still have apprehensions about the caped idiot himself. Even if he was a hero, and she knew he wouldn’t do anything completely stupid while she recovered, there were still so many reasons for the green-haired esper to be wary.

But right now, the pros outweighed the cons. The scene she’d witnessed atop the ship had definitely raised her opinion of him too, even if she hated to admit it.

His cape still fluttered warmly in her mind.

“Fine,” said Tatsumaki. The words came out like sandpaper in her mouth. She felt a little lightheaded after having not spoken in a while. “But I don’t need you… ahh… coddling me while I recover, got that?”

“Yeah, yeah, sure,” Saitama breathed a sigh of relief, finally managing to convince the little esper to make a decision — despite it being very much to his own detriment. “I’ll carry you there now, okay?”

“Duh. I can’t walk, so you have to carry me,” the esper said, closing her eyes. “Make sure the ride isn’t bumpy.”

Saitama pushed down his building annoyance and picked her up for a second time that day. The bald hero began jogging towards Z-City.

“Is the ‘ride’ smooth enough for you?” he started sarcastically, the ground whizzing by under him. Receiving no response, he assumed that it was. So he decided to try and make some small talk.

“Are you really sure you want to stay over at my place?” he asked. “Why don’t you want to go to your sister?”

The only thing he could hear were the sounds of his footsteps and the wind rushing past his smooth head. Saitama looked down.

The esper had fallen asleep in his arms, finally succumbing to exhaustion.

‘She was kinda more reasonable after I talked to her,’ Saitama thought. ‘I’ve gotta remember to thank Bang for his advice.’

Smiling to himself, the bald man could almost taste the rice bowl he would be making for dinner…

That is, if he hadn’t overlooked something very, very important. Slowing to a halt and thinking for a few moments, realization dawned on the bald hero. When Genos had rushed off, Saitama had told him to buy some medical supplies for the little esper — as well as a small bag of rice to cook later on. But…

‘I… I forgot to tell Genos to buy eggs. Damn.’

 

Chapter 6: Eggs and Eggheads

 

Saitama jumped in surprise as Tatsumaki sat up in front of him, almost dropping the manga he was reading. It was a classic horror story — he’d gotten very invested — and the esper’s sudden movement caused his heart to skip a beat.

As the esper in question slowly looked around, Saitama calmed down and picked up where he left off. He wanted nothing to do with the spiral-haired esper at the moment. Based on his manga, her twisting green curls weren’t to be trusted.

 

Tatsumaki scanned the room groggily, giving no sign that she paid the bald man’s outburst any attention. It seemed she was currently in an apartment. A tiny one, even for her standards. The room she was currently in was around five-by-five meters large, and was filled all around with shelves, mats, and tables — making the place feel cramped and small. A single glass window-slash-door-to-the-balcony was providing the lighting for the room. At least that was big.

Judging from the light streaming from the window, it appeared to be around seven in the evening — the orange hues of the setting sun bathed the room in a bright glow.

The thin sheets under the esper felt quite warm, too — she guessed that she’d been asleep for quite a while. Something was odd, though. Her body felt… more constricted than usual.

Looking down, Tatsumaki realized her legs and arms were wrapped tightly in bandages. A new piece of cloth was on her head, too.

Still quite lethargic, the esper frowned. She didn’t know where the hell she was.

 

‘You can stay with us for a bit.’

 

Tatsumaki’s eyes widened.

“You… I…” the girl sputtered, facing the bald man. She felt lightheaded again, and the way she spoke definitely showed it. “I told you… I didn’t need you to… coddle me.”

Saitama was still reading. He’d changed from his hero outfit to a plain white t-shirt and black shorts. “You were bleeding all over. I had to replace your headband on the way here.”

“I was fine,” the girl insisted.

“And now you’re better than fine,” the bald man said.

“… Geh.”

Tatsumaki dropped the matter and laid back down. She didn’t want to admit that was relieved to have her injuries tended to. That, and the simple act of sitting upright was embarrassingly difficult. Tatsumaki felt her whole upper body berating her as she laid down.

“I suppose you want me to report your victory against the alien in exchange for me staying here,” the esper blurted.

The bald man looked up over his manga, raising an eyebrow. Was that her way of making small talk?

“You mean Boros? Not really,” he started. “It’s kinda embarrassing how late I was. I’d feel bad if I took credit when you fought him first.”

“Mmm. So… you’re looking for money, then?” Tatsumaki raised an eyebrow. Saitama put the book down.

“About that,” Saitama said, pulling his collar. “Genos is… sorta handling all our finances. There’s really no need.”

The esper’s eyes narrowed. What did the man want, then? Not money, not recognition… maybe he was — no… he couldn’t be…

Right?

Tatsumaki turned over to look at him.

“Are you…” Tatsumaki narrowed her eyes. “Are you into me?”

“Hu—gbh!” Saitama almost choked on his own spit. “Like hell I am!!”

Tatsumaki bristled at the baldy’s violent reaction. “That was a perfectly normal question!!”

“Normal?! You suck at small talk, you know that?” Saitama said. “That isn’t normal at all.”

“Fine.” The esper crossed her arms. “Whatever.”

Saitama stayed silent for a moment, feeling the mood completely dropping. He had half a mind to try and remedy the tension, but he wasn’t quite sure what to do.

“You… uh… should get some rest,” he said eventually, picking up his manga. “That way, you can grow taller.”

Tatsumaki sat up.

“I’m older than you, skinhead!” she spat.

“Skin—” Saitama blinked. “No you aren’t!!”

“Uh, yes I am,” Tatsumaki insisted. “Even if you’ve gone bald, I can tell that you’re still a child . Your face screams inexperience.”

“Well— your face looks like a doll’s!!” Saitama retorted, gesturing at the esper’s facial features. Realizing it came off more like a compliment, he added, “A kid’s doll! Those needlessly expensive ones that no sane person would buy!”

“Those ones always have the best hair,” the esper smirked, not missing a beat. “But… ugh,” she paused, feeling her ribs insist that she lay down. She awkwardly forced out the insult. “But you wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?”

“What did you say, you—!” Saitama reminded himself that no matter how prickly she may be, she was a guest. An injured guest whom he offered a place to stay and rest. It was a good thing that she was as lively as she was, too. That meant it probably wouldn’t be long before she left on her own.

“How old are you then?” the baldy asked through gritted teeth.

“Twenty-eight,” Tatsumaki said, closing her eyes.

“Pfft, no way!” Saitama stood up, quickly stepped around the esper, and started up his laptop. There was a hero registry website, he remembered. There was no way the esper would be able to lie about her legal information there. Probably.

“Wanna bet on it?” Tatsumaki asked, steadying her breaths.

A few seconds, a few mouse clicks, and a few scrolled pages later, and Saitama looked over to her in disbelief. Her face was smug.

“You’re twenty-eight?!?! But you’re a midget!! ”

“Exact—” The esper’s eyes shot open. “HEY!!”

Before the two could escalate into another full-blown argument, the door swung open with a bang.

“Sensei, I heard a—!” Genos said, eyes scanning the room for danger. They landed on the green-haired girl and he sighed in relief.

“Oh, it’s just you,” he said. The cyborg had almost forgotten the esper was there. He walked inside, carefully putting his shoes near the doorway. It was quite difficult, since he was carrying a paper bag in his arms.

“What do you mean… ‘just me?’” The esper propped herself up gently with her arm.

Genos walked into the kitchen and spoke to the esper through the kitchen pass-through, bringing out two cartons of eggs inside the paper bag. “Since you obviously cannot use your psychic abilities at the moment,” the cyborg said, taking an egg and inspecting it. “You are unable to harm sensei.”

The green-haired girl clicked her tongue. First, a B-Class nobody had somehow saved her, and now a rookie S-Class was calling her powerless? She couldn’t say anything since it was true at the moment, but it pissed her off, either way. “I’d crush you in two seconds by tomorrow.”

“Just try it, brat,” growled Genos. Saitama quickly stood up in between the esper and cyborg.

“Hey, hey, hey — you know what? We should all just stop fighting,” Saitama said, walking over to Genos. His disciple had just discarded three ‘flawed’ eggs and was now inspecting a fourth one closely. 

“Tatsu-whatsit, you should thank Genos!” Saitama said. “He helped me patch you up pretty well — and bought us eggs right after, too.” Saitama picked one up and showed it to the esper. He handed it to the cyborg afterwards.

“Eh?” Tatsumaki said. Still leaning on one arm, the esper looked down at her bandages. They certainly were more well-tied than whatever the baldy attempted on her forehead. But a full on ‘thank you?’ That was out of the question. “Good job, I guess.”

“It was not for your sake,” Genos said, cracking the egg his sensei gave him into a bowl. “You’re lucky master is as thoughtful as he is.”

“Uh huh,” Tatsumaki said, falling onto her futon. “I won’t be here for long.”

As the two began to prepare a meal, the esper closed her eyes and mulled over her current situation. Z-City was admittedly a very lucky place to be staying in for the time being. Her sister probably wouldn’t think to look for her in such a remote town — and that was already enough to make it excellent in the green-haired esper’s eyes.

What really sealed the deal was being able to avoid the Hero Association.

The girl knew that the H.A. was still hesitant to send heroes to Z-City due to the rumors about its dangerous ghost town. Even if they did plan to search around, they would probably need a few weeks to prepare, since the press would be all over their activities at the moment. All in all, Tatsumaki concluded, the city was not a bad spot to be alone and recover.

That is, if one didn’t consider the two very odd heroes looking after her.

Despite his attitude, the cyborg Genos was the least difficult to pin down. His goals were so simple it was almost funny: follow master, obey master, blah, blah, blah. His single-minded ideals were annoying, but not enough to make the esper want to leave. As long as he kept his arrogant mouth shut, that is.

Then there was him.

She didn’t quite remember his name — ‘ something to do with ‘tama,’ maybe? ’ — but the bald hero seemed completely off to her. There was no way he didn’t want anything in exchange for her staying there, try as he might to hide it.

Tatsumaki decided, one way or another, her current goal was to figure him out.

 

* * *

 

“Dinner,” Saitama announced dramatically. “Is served!”

He placed three bowls of scrambled eggs on rice, still steaming from the pan. Genos soon followed, bringing out a shredded seaweed shaker and Japanese mayonnaise from the fridge. The baldy spread the bowls around on the apartment’s small center table and handed out a pair of chopsticks to each of them. The cyborg placed the condiments at the center of the table.

Tatsumaki sat herself up, smelling the newly cooked food.

She sprinkled some nori and mayo on the piping-hot bowl and dug in.

It was… quite good. The rice paired perfectly with the nori, and the scrambled eggs practically melted in her mouth — the added flavors of the mayo enhanced the flavor even further. It was a simple meal, but she couldn’t stop herself from eating bite after bite.

The esper didn’t realize how hungry she was.

It had been almost half a day since her last meal, not to mention she’d just strained herself more in that half-day than she had in most of her life. A part of her wanted to just pick the bowl up, raise it over her mouth and let gravity do the work.

Saitama looked at her smugly.

“You like it, huh?” he asked.

“Huh? Of course not!” Tatsumaki was naturally inclined to antagonize him. “I’m just hungry.”

“But you’re smiling.”

“I…!” The esper quickly covered her mouth. “I am not!” the esper huffed. “The food was so hot — my face curled up.”

The bald man wasn’t convinced, but didn’t bother to push the esper further. After all, she wasn’t the only hungry one in that apartment. Carrying an esper for miles was busy work.

The three heroes ate on in silence, speaking only to ask for the condiments to be passed around. Eventually, the sun dipped below the horizon, and Genos promptly stood to turn on the house-lights. As he sat back down and continued his bowl, Tatsumaki absentmindedly wondered why a cyborg needed to eat.

 

After a few more minutes and a little more condiment-sharing, the three heroes were left with empty plates and full stomachs.

Saitama stretched and burped loudly.

“Ahh,” the bald man said, patting his belly. He gave Genos a thumbs-up. “That. Was good.”

“I am glad it was adequate, sensei,” Genos said. He picked up the three empty bowls and brought them into the kitchen to wash.

Tatsumaki tried to relax on her futon, watching as the young cyborg dutifully rinsed their dinner glassware. She turned her head, wondering if the baldy would also help out.

Nope. Saitama was sitting in the corner. He had begun to read his manga again.

Tatsumaki shrugged to herself. If the cyborg was really the baldy’s disciple, then it was no surprise who did the work at home. It was odd, though, now that she thought about it. A B-Class being the master of an S-Class.

‘Hmm…’

Something just didn’t sit right with the esper — and it definitely wasn’t the eggs she just had. There was something really off-putting to her about the baldy.

Perhaps it had to do with whatever had gone on before and after his battle with Boros. Tatsumaki saw him being all chummy with Silverfang hours ago. He had attended an S-Class meeting unannounced — and was apparently having his needs paid for by a famous rookie hero to boot. The man was a walking S-Class hero magnet — a huge outlier in the hero world — and it felt much too devious for the girl’s liking. There was something there that the esper was just not seeing.

“Hey, baldy,” Tatsumaki said loudly, still laying down. The baldy in question looked up from his manga, staring dubiously at the esper’s hair. The esper couldn’t help but wonder what he was reading.

“The name’s Saitama,” he said, cutting her train of thought. “What do you want?”

“What’s the deal here?” she asked, eyeing him.

“Huh?”

“I mean, the deal. ” Tatsumaki said. “Why the cyborg’s your disciple. Why Silverfang likes you. What did you do to get them to hang around you like ants to sweets?”

“Uhh,” Saitama raised an eyebrow. “Nothing…?”

Tatsumaki didn’t buy it.

“Did you… save them or something?” she asked, eyes widening. Oh, that was devious .

“Hmm,” Saitama placed a finger on his chin. The name Silverfang didn’t ring a bell. Maybe he was one of the heroes that fought the Deep Sea whatchamacallit. “I think so, why?”

“If you’re thinking of getting me to follow you around just because you… urgh… ‘ saved ’ me, you can just drop it. Right now.” the esper said icily.

“What’re you talking about?” the baldy said, putting his manga down. “I’m not asking you to do anything.”

“You don’t need to keep up the ‘I’m so honorable’ charade, baldy,” Tatsumaki sat up. She was sick and tired of hearing him act all clueless and innocent. “You’re a B-Class nobody, and I’m Class S rank 2. I have connections. I have influence. I have money. You brought me here, injured. Was it out of the goodness of your little twenty-five year-old heart? Of course not. What do you want?”

No matter what the B-Class asked for, she wouldn’t give it to him. Tatsumaki simply loathed talking to fakes. The sooner the esper was able to ascertain his desires, the sooner she would have peace of mind. And the sooner she could remove the nagging feeling in her head that she could actually trust him. 

Waiting for an answer, the esper turned her emerald eyes to Genos. The cyborg’s dish-washing had considerably slowed as the conversation continued, Tatsumaki noted. Genos’ head was turned up, listening intently. The kid seemed to really trust his sensei. Maybe the bald man’s answer would change that.

“What do I want, huh?” Saitama said, eyes turned to the ceiling.

Soon, all ears were on the baldy. Thinking for a moment, he rubbed his chin with his pointer and thumb.

“Ah!” He nodded, smacking the side of his fist on his palm. “I have it!”

“What?” Tatsumaki asked, narrowing her eyes.

“Hmm… You have psychic powers right?” the bald man asked. There was an ominous glint in his pupils.

The esper nodded tiredly. ‘There it is.’

“Then,” he said, standing up. He walked over to the desk, rummaging around through some neatly stacked papers. As he stumbled about, Tatsumaki caught a glimpse of his Association papers, some receipts, and a very harshly-worded hate letter written in red ink. His hand lingered over the letter for longer than usual. Was he targeting someone?

A few moments passed as Saitama searched his small, cluttered workspace.

“Ah, found it!” he exclaimed. “Okay. Hear me out…”

‘Here it comes.’ Tatsumaki rolled her eyes.

“Come grocery shopping with me tomorrow!”

Saitama proudly held out a flyer for a sale — “ This Weekend Only! 40% off on Vegetables and Dairy!!”

“Huh?” The green-eyed esper blinked. “ G-grocery shopping?! Pffffft—! ” She managed to contain herself, half out of stubbornness and half out of care for her injured ribs. It came off as a very soft-sounding scoff. “That’s it?!”

“Hey, it’s not just any old trip to the store!” Saitama said defensively. “Forty percent is basically half-off! We’d make a steal here! Imagine how much we could carry with your powers!”

“That’s so stupid!” Tatsumaki said, lying back down. Even if she hadn’t laughed, her chest still hurt trying to stifle it. “I can’t even lift that stupid flier you’re holding right now! What, were you gonna make me float a bunch of veggies into your shopping basket?”

“I was, uhh, thinking more on milk,” the baldy looked disappointed.

On the contrary, the esper’s dark mood had completely vanished.

“Sensei, I will go with you!” The cyborg volunteered, splashing soap-water around the kitchen. Saitama waved his hand. 

“Nah, don’t worry about it,” he said, clearly deflated. He sat down in a corner and picked his manga back up. “It was just a dumb idea.”

As the baldy started reading and the cyborg finished up the dishes, Tatsumaki dropped back down on her covers for what felt like the tenth time that day.

She stared at the ceiling quietly, her mind whirling with thoughts, and her emotions jumbled.

Soon the apartment was dipped in a comfortable silence; the buzz of an electric fan was the only sound in the house. Once in a while, a page flipped and Saitama muttered under his breath.

Tatsumaki usually hated sleeping in new places. She found any bed that wasn’t hers, horrible — and sleeping with company was even worse.

But something within the esper had eased, loosened along with the peals of contained laughter that had escaped her moments ago. In the stuffy, dubious, and awkwardly-lit apartment, atop the thinnest futon she’d ever had the displeasure of laying on — for several hours at that — the esper found herself relaxing.

Sleep came to her easily, with the taste of a lovely dinner fresh on her mind.