Cotton Candy Blues

by VoyagerWisp

Summary:

Jessie's always followed her whims and lived her life spontaneously, filling her days with the various activities and people that satisfied her at the time. She'll get around to things like marriage eventually. Everyone does, and she's certainly lovely and charming enough to be a 'bride' so will fit perfectly into that role. Right?

"Frillish," Jessie began and she stepped forward, a smirk on her face, "bubble!"

"Fril," Jessie's lovely pokemon called out as its lacy appendages waved slowly in the air, giving both a ghostly and underwater effect.

"Bibarel, water gun!"

As Jessie's current opponent shouted an order, Frillish's mouth opened, then began expelling different bubbles rapidly before they moved like a wave across its appendages while moving rapidly toward the opponent. Bibarel began its attack at about the same time, shooting a thinned stream of water from its mouth which caught the outside sun, causing a prism-like effect. But the efforts for aesthetics seemed to lessen the effect of the water type attack Frillish was already resistant against. Jessie's pokemon took the hit without flinching while her opponent's winced, its aim eventually failing.

"Alright, time!" The battle was over - just a makeshift contest-style battle. Jessie was the only person in this little get together who'd actually done a real contest battle, so there hadn't been much competition. "Calculating the points, well, Jessie is the winner!" the woman who had been moderating announced. "Um, your name is Jessie, right?" she said in a low voice.

Jessie had actually given some other alias that started with her actual name, but she shrugged and let it slide. "Good match," her opponent said after taking care of her bibarel. "You definitely won. Bibarel actually had some pretty showy normal type moves, but that wasn't an option."

Was she making excuses? Of course, Frillish was a ghost type, so Bibarel's normal type attacks wouldn't affect it. But just the same, Frillish's ghost type attack was also impressive, but would just have gone right through Bibarel. The idea was worth mocking, but Jessie let it go. Now that she was more rooted in one place, taking on more clerical duties in Team Rocket, she'd been trying to make more connections - some actual friends outside her organization might be nice. Coming to this get together of water type trainers was one way. "Of course, my frillish was spectacular. But given the circumstances, both pokemon got to show off their water type moves, hm?"

"Yeah!" Conversation broke out about how each pokemon had looked, and what Bibarel might do differently to be both powerful and stylish.

"I could give you some pointers later if you'd like. I do have experience in this area," Jessie couldn't help but brag.

"To tell you the truth, I was developing that move so Bibarel could show off during my upcoming wedding. It might cool things off too, since we're holding the ceremony outside during the summer."

"You're getting married?" Jessie said, blinking her eyes as she thought of the subject. Then she broke into a smile. "Congratulations!"

Jessie wasn't the only one giving congratulations. Others in the group squealed, even screamed out their excitement at such an event. They crowded around, chatter going through the air. "Bibarel's going to be such a lovely flower girl," one noted. Nearby, Bibarel was indeed collecting flowers, Frillish leaning down and helping, collecting two itself despite being a ghost.

"Yeah," the woman agreed as she observed. "Was Frillish also a kind of flower girl at your wedding, Mrs. Jessie?"

Hm? Why was that kind of title being added to her so presumptively? It felt strange, actually. "I haven't been married," Jessie said before she could think about things too much.

"Oh." The bride-to-be's face broke into an expression of pure concern. That the others, who had just been so excited and enthusiastic had their expressions go blank, one coughing and several turning away, also couldn't be ignored. "I'm sorry," the woman added.

"Why would you be sorry?" Jessie asked.

"No, no, I'm sure you'll find someone." The bride-to-be forced a grin onto her face. "Don't worry."

"I'm not worried," Jessie said, though perhaps she was becoming a bit self-conscious at this kind of reaction. "I may not be the marrying type, anyway," she said with a grin. Even not being true - of course she'd be hitched to the perfect, rich suitor eventually - maybe she just wanted to drop the topic. People could go back to celebrating this person's upcoming wedding.

After the bride-to-be responded to Jessie's declaration with an incredulous expression, they did - to an obnoxious extent. They were there to discuss their water type pokemon, weren't they? Jessie had joined to give her frillish more attention, and also out of general interest. The water type pokemon she'd had before frillish had given her some trouble, so maybe she could use the pointers. But though the pokemon and training them got occasional mentions, conversation was dominated with talk of weddings, husbands, boyfriends, children they'd had or would like to have.

Before Jessie could think she was the only one there who wasn't involved in any of that, a blip of a conversation was heard. One other person there didn't have a significant other, having just broken up. The young woman started lamenting that fact.

Jessie decided to console her. "It's alright. Just say bye-bye without any regrets." She chuckled as she spoke. "Don't let the door hit him on his way out and all. You have plenty else going for you. Look at how well you've raised your wonderful vaporeon. He, or any man, isn't necessary."

For some reason, the girl seemed a bit put off. Someone else quickly broke in, "Don't worry. You'll find someone else. You do have a lot going for you - you're pretty, personable, and kind. You still have plenty of time too!"

The girl beamed, much happier after hearing someone else's consolation. What was wrong with what Jessie had said? It was true. Gazes flitted toward Jessie herself after she had spoken, maybe lingering on her a little too long. After that, the conversations continued happily with the same focus. When trying to join in, responses were curt, if any, and gazes were avoided. Even being right there, there seemed to be a wall, no, a chasm between Jessie and the rest of them.

Finally, there was a topic she might break into. "Practicing contest battles was so fun. I might enter a real one some day, when I'm ready."

Jessie rose to her feet, pointing out into the air. "Contests! Contest battles! As you may have guessed from my performances today, I've been in a few of those. I can tell you all about it!"

Their eyes moved like tiny bugs, jumping toward her like a quick bite before even more quickly hopping away as if Jessie hadn't even spoken. "Yeah, I can tell you more about the article I read about contests..." one of the other women said. "I'm going with my husband to enter my first next month."

The situation confused. Besides winning their makeshift little tiered competition that day, Jessie had actually had experience with this topic. And yet, everyone's attention was focused on someone who had just read an article and wanted to try it out herself. Jessie wanted to help, would be glad to provide some info as someone that had actually been in contests in multiple regions, but... What was this? Had they heard her? They weren't simply rejecting her, were they?

In the past, she may have remained in denial. But in the present, Jessie could piece together the hints and figure out where she stood. And in fact, she did stand, not caring as the folding chair clacked behind her. Nearby, her pokemon was found, sinking into the ground and trying to blend in with the wildflowers. "Let's go, Frillish!" In her anger, Jessie didn't think before she grabbed onto one of Frillish's appendages, ready to pull her heavy pokemon forward. Instead, her hand went right through Frillish's still incorporeal state, and she went tumbling toward the ground.

Landing there, Jessie quickly stood up, sneezing. Frillish got to her side, mouth parted with concern. It hadn't meant to trip up its trainer. Jessie was about to reassure it before noting that she herself was suddenly no longer a ghost, multiple people spying a look her way. "Are you okay?" one asked, a wry grin as she exchanged glances with another.

"Just fine," Jessie said, brushing off her clothing as she started her way away.

"You leaving? Hope you'll be okay, with everything you've got going on."

Jessie didn't respond as she continued on with Frillish behind her, blocking their view. Everything she had going on? What did that mean? She had a full team of six wonderful pokemon, a higher up position in Team Rocket with far less danger and less work than previous where her experience as someone who had been out in the world and seen so many damn rare pokemon was valued, status as a talented coordinator she may still return to, and plenty of other hobbies. Sure, maybe she didn't have a boyfriend, but whatever. And maybe she wasn't popular, with tons of friends...

Jessie stopped, now secluded on a side walk with no one ahead or behind other than her lovely ghost type. Now with some distance from her eruption of anger, it felt like some kind of lava had settled in her gut. Yeah, the whole point of going to that group was to connect and make friends. What had prevented that?

Did they see something wrong with her? Jessie touched her face, continuing in slow steps. Marriage was brought up a lot. Were they wondering why Jessie hadn't found someone and been appropriately paired up? Right, she'd dedicated herself to evil, but even then, this seemed to be the kind of thing that just happened. She was in her thirties, when people typically had already been married.

Everyone else there certainly had seemed to. From what they talked about so many there were into family life, with a kid, or two, or maybe more... They seemed to have that, or that desire in common. It was the focus of their world. Jessie had been rejected because it wasn't the focus of hers. Even though it wasn't supposed to be the topic of the get-together at all, being into all of that seemed a prerequisite. Maybe they saw those who weren't as being broken inside somehow - or even pitiable?

They could keep their pity. Starting to fume again, Jessie rounded the corner, finally around someone other than her ghostly pokemon. There was a stand set up serving cotton candy - one she'd seen on the way in. "Frillish!" Frillish cheered, spinning around once as it continued to float as if it really were in the water. Did it want some? Well, there was no line other than the one group already being served.

That group seemed to be a family. Wife, husband, and toddler in a carriage. Again? This configuration really was the default. Jessie stared at the picture while the cotton candy was given to the kid. The scene in front of her seemed so far away and foreign. She'd considered wanting to fit herself into that kind of picture when in Kalos, when the doctor had been kind to her. She might become that wife and live a peaceful life. But was that really herself she was imagining?

The wife of Dr. White would not only be kind like him, but quiet, meek, and soft-spoken. Her very happiness would be an appealing part of the scenery. Was being that something truly wanted? Would that be worth the self she currently had falling by the wayside and fading into a story?

Part of that story may involve a mini-me or two. Dedicating everything into caring for one's own child would be an absolute necessity. But was having one something to be aimed for? Even though Jessie had often asserted kids were just rotten brats, the one in front of her actually seemed fairly well-natured, calmly taking the treat with a wide-eyed, happy expression. Taking care of it had to take a lot of time and effort, but couldn't be that bad. Parenthood was supposed to be 'rewarding' and all that, along with all of the other benefits that came from a proper marriage.

Was she really that objectionable for not being part of this kind of picture yet?

There had also been the one woman lamenting her own lack, still welcomed in. Thinking back, the difference between Jessie and her was that Jessie refused to howl and cast herself as unfortunate. In contrast to others, Jessie simply existed without, completely without apologies. Was that seen as disrespectful?

As if! Jessie had cheered just as much as anyone else about the upcoming wedding. It was an appealing picture and reason to celebrate. She'd never said it was bad or anything, and honestly didn't think so. If they'd seen any other attitude from her, that was just what they were taking from encountering someone whose life was so different.

"Fril!" Frillish's ghostly cry interrupted any other thoughts. It floated ahead, reaching down and stealing that treat from that brat like a proper Team Rocket member. Floating above the kid with a smile on its face, Frillish tore a small chunk of the fluffy candy which matched its own color and ate it. "Frillish!" Frillish gave one final call of satisfaction at its crime.

"Frillish! You can't just do that!" Jessie said. The kid in the carriage peered up, seeming more confused than upset. Frillish mirrored their expression, having a similar look of confusion at Jessie's objection. Jessie quickly went up and bought one cotton candy herself, then handed it to the kid, who now was completely caught up in the sight of the weird pokemon and human. A few more awkward words with the parents later, Jessie rushed on her way. Stealing candy from a baby wasn't something she felt like getting in trouble for.

"Fril!" Frillish held out a piece of cotton candy, happy to share.

Jessie stared at it. Cotton candy had always held a visual appeal. This one especially, in its perfect spiral shape, mixed with edible glitter with a few tiny star-shaped sprinkles to increase that allure. It was a lovely treat and of course people wanted some. Even so, Jessie didn't want it, not a single piece. It was fine to see, the stand and all the items bought from it being an attractive addition to the park, but not something she personally had any desire for. "I don't want any," Jessie declared to her pokemon. "Do you have a problem with that?"

"Fril?" Frillish's large, ghostly eyes briefly widened. But it soon got over the rejection of its sharing, eating the cotton candy all on its own. Right, of course. Different people could make different things a part of them and still not have any kind of problem with those that are different.

This sentiment was repeated over and over again, but still, discontent managed to seep in, even as Jessie returned to her shared company apartment. Just disliking a type of food was one thing, but having the wrong type of life was another. They'd avoid her because of the defects in her that had led to that - that she was frigid, unwanted, overall just undesirable.

"Hey Jess! You're back already!" Meowth hopped on their table to see better as it spoke. Its brow furrowed. "Uh... Something wrong?"

"As if you care," Jessie snapped back.

Meowth didn't match her energy, frowning. "Hey! Of course I care. We're pals, get it?"

Jessie sighed, putting a hand on her forehead as she sat in front of it. "Meowth, what do you think about marriage?"

"It's that thing you humans do to pair off. I love it! Maybe this meowth could pair off like that too." Meowth started laughing, slicking back its fur with its paw.

"What do you think about people who don't get married?" Jessie asked. Meowth blinked, paying her mind as she slumped over the table and sighed. "Like even by the time they're over thirty..."

"Oh," Meowth drawled knowingly. It squinted its eyes, paw to its chin this time. "So that's what you're moping around about... Yeah, you humans typically got this figured out by your age..."

"Figured out?" Jessie repeated, clenching her fists and sitting up. "I know how things work! I just haven't done them!"

"Right, right." Meowth tapped her shoulder with sympathy. "I get it. Tell you what, Jim and I will help you solve this problem. The two of us can head over to your boyfriend's place and have a chat. We'll 'convince' him to marry you, if you get what I'm saying." Meowth chuckled.

"You'll what?!"

Meowth extended its claws before grinning with every pointy tooth showing. "He's not gonna say no to any of this," Meowth said, gesturing toward its sharp features rather than anything about Jessie herself.

"You're not doing that!" Jessie objected, now standing up and slamming her hands on the table, shaking it enough that Meowth fell. "You think no one will marry me unless you threaten them?!"

"Uh..." Meowth lost its confidence, claws moving together sheepishly. "I didn't-"

"You didn't a lot of things! Leave me alone!"

Meowth indeed dashed away as Jessie swept her hand across the table. But as ridiculous as the suggestions had been, after her friend was gone, Jessie was again left alone again, certainly moping.

The 'boyfriend' Meowth had been referring to was probably the one guy she actually ended up going on a third date with before they had just stopped a while ago. Unlike some of Jessie's romantic interactions of the long past, there had been no dramatic reason behind it. There was nothing objectionable about him, actually. They'd both just fallen off, maybe after not having connected much in the first place.

The last conversation with him definitely echoed through the mind, falling like lead. The topic of marriage actually had come up casually when Jessie had wondered if that was something he was interested in seeking out.

He'd responded without even needing to let the idea properly pass through him, perhaps already being one with it. "Of course." He'd smirked, sitting back. "Yeah, it's difficult, huh? Putting ourselves out here going on dates like this can get awkward. But we can get there when it's right."

Not having kept in contact with him, for all Jessie knew, he already had. He had talked about how 'awkward' and 'difficult' it all was, but how he spoke about the topic, it seemed so natural and welcomed.

Meanwhile, Jessie had imagined herself walking down that aisle, not necessarily with him. She wanted it, she'd tried to convince herself back then, and was still trying to convince herself in the moment. But no matter how appealing the pretty ceremony looked, and romantic the idea seemed, actually following through seemed more like playing a part. Jessie was certainly good at picking something up, both in Team Rocket and other contexts. But actually being Jessie while wearing that gown and declaring herself to follow a certain template for the rest of her life? It was fine for others, but the idea, and the reality, seemed completely separated from Jessie herself. She didn't want it.

Was her outlook really so foreign and terrible?

Jessie paced about a while with these thoughts, pretending to clean up while really doing not much at all. The thoughts pecked like a swarm of spearow. Being in a state of 'evil' could be used as an excuse for why others had rejected her. Of course people would want to avoid a criminal in Team Rocket. But in present time Team Rocket was involved in more mundane tasks, and she was hiding her status besides. In the long past, the organization hadn't even been a factor as she'd tried hard to fit in - to various clubs, social groups, and even schools. Perhaps she wasn't just 'bad' as in criminal, but something completely worthless about her at the core that had others shutting her out from the start.

The door opened, the cracking sound seemed to cause multiple layers of malaise to fracture and partially crumble as Jessie picked up her head. Coming through the door was her longtime companion, clad in his newer, more muted Team Rocket garb, Mime Jr. bouncing in by his side. James was in shape in his chic uniform as usual, his hair sleek even after what had to have been a long day of working at the office. At the sight of him, Jessie relaxed. James was someone she could be comfortable around, as she often was. Even if they now more often than not had separate tasks at work, they commiserated together and often ended up collaborating with various projects regardless. Jessie didn't especially feel the need to put on a performance just for him. Not even greeting him, she crumpled back over on the table.

James slowly put down his bag. As Mime Jr. helpfully put it away, he took off his shoes before entering. The next step in his routine was going back to change. He should be left alone to continue that flow. Jessie didn't stop him.

But James's steps did stop, his figure casting a shadow in front of her. Whatever he was doing wasn't her concern, but she ended up looking up at him just because he was there and not moving. James's eyes rested on hers, brow creased, lips pursed. "Jessie," he began as she met his eyes, "what's wrong?"

James's tone was so concerned, and so final as to if there really was something wrong with Jessie. What an obnoxious attitude. "Nothing!" Jessie snapped, instantly taking to her feet, ready to set up her sharp barbs to provide a stabbing rejection herself. If getting cut, that would teach anyone who may find something 'wrong' with her. When they started to bleed, the only thing they'd get from her would be a cold glare.

James's hand rested gently on her shoulder. His gesture was too careful to slice off his fingers or even so much as scratch his skin. Jessie couldn't help but visually acknowledge him again. James maintained his silent concern, patiently waiting for her to respond instead of just accepting her initial quip as the truth. Jessie took a deep, slow breath, trying to close off this exposed part of herself. Something that day had ripped open a wound that continued to be torn into again and again, but it really shouldn't be that big of a deal.

James's hand slipped down her shoulder, the motion comforting. "Weren't you going to do something on your day off?" he asked.

"I did." Jessie sharply inhaled as her irritated response had certainly given away that something had gone wrong there.

"Did you just get back?" James suggested.

Jessie folded her arms again, pacing before she went back on their couch. "Hell no. Why would I stay late? I vacated that waste of space far earlier than intended." Jessie paused and James said nothing, causing her to shout out just to fill up the silence. "Maybe they thought I wasn't worthy to be in their presence, but it was actually the opposite!"

As Jessie finished, James slid into place on the cushion next to her. His expression remained easy as he put his arm around her. This was a frequent position since they'd moved into this place, actually. And even before then, James was someone she could easily accept this kind of closeness from. Jessie leaned her head against him, again breathing easier as she took in the physical feeling of his presence. Being next to James like this had always been a comfort. However as James took her hand, she may have squeezed it just a tad too tightly before she sniped, "There's nothing wrong with me, anyway."

James squeezed it back, and she loosened her grip, even wanting to sulk more. "Why would you think there was?"

"I-" Jessie stopped herself before saying she didn't, but of course, she had just admitted there had been plenty that day to convince there may be.

"Did someone say something to you today?" James suggested in her lull.

"Just forget about them," Jessie muttered with a huff. She stretched out her legs, causing James to break the hug. "There's nothing wrong at all."

"I believe there is." Turning toward James revealed his expression was serious, his tone unusually firm, accusing her though he'd normally let things like this go. He reached forward and stroked her hair, tucking a piece behind her ear. His hand then again took hers as he gazed into her eyes. "What is it, Jessie?"

Was her malcontent really showing through this much? Jessie gripped his hand back. "Well, I'm just wondering why people make such a fuss about certain things. Don't people have a variety of lifestyles?"

James slowly blinked. "Well, yes," was all he responded to her with after a pause.

She wanted him to say more, but of course, he probably couldn't have much to say given how vague she was being. "It's fine to not... Well..." Jessie paused, unable to say it aloud. It was almost like being told to open a curtain while she was trying to make sure no light shone in. "Never mind." Jessie clenched her eyes shut, not wanting to say any more. The inclination to put what she'd been thinking about into words seemed about as good an idea as stepping on an already cracking iced pond with water from the bottom leaking through. Stepping on it and being swallowed into the frigid, dark waters away from everyone's sight wasn't about to be done.

After opening her eyes, James was still seen, enraptured in her presence. He was still right next to her, hand in hers, arm still around her shoulder, the two of them absolutely together in their default configuration, just not as casual as usual. Rather than having accepted the dropped topic, he was waiting patiently for Jessie to continue. He didn't declare she certainly had more to say, he just waited, knowing she did.

Dropping the trepidation which really seemed uncalled for in the first place, Jessie decided to get out what was really on her mind. "Not everyone gets married." Rather than ask for confirmation that something already known to be true, Jessie simply made this declaration. "Some people wait - and some just don't!" Jessie leaned forward, getting almost too close to James's face as she shamelessly continued with her rant, "Some may think it's not just a personal occasion to celebrate, but something that makes them superior to those who don't bother. Well it doesn't! Even if it's great for them, why would something so commonplace be so special? Maybe it's not the greatest thing in the world for everyone! Maybe it's not great at all for some people! Maybe certain people don't even want to at all!"

James blinked back at her, mostly nonplused, though his eyes had subtly widened. What was said was apparently so shocking that he couldn't muster more reaction than that? Was it really such a terrible thing to say, awful outlook to have? That question in mind, Jessie paused from saying anything further herself. Should she shout out any thoughts he might be having?

Before she could, James loosened his grip, running his hand lightly over Jessie's own, returning feeling she hadn't realized she'd lost. His face returned to normal, giving her a slight smile and nullifying a silly momentary panic.

At least until he spoke again. "So you don't want to get married, Jessie?"

Some sort of fight or flight was activated at James's question, and of course, smacking the hell out of such an accusation was the way to go. Why would anyone think she was like that?

...Except for the fact she'd just been saying so. But that was all just about some hypothetical person, who certainly did exist, in plural even, even if that didn't include Jessie herself. Wait, what had she been saying at that water type meet up? Enough that the people there would probably make the same presumption James was making here! But she wasn't like that, because she wasn't the kind of person who...

The ideas Jessie wanted to chide others for having were certainly running through her own mind. She was thinking she wasn't like that - but not because joining the conjugal cult was a lovely idea that completely fit her, rather because she didn't want to be attached to all those negative connotations that went along with not being and not wanting that lifestyle. That image didn't fit!

But that idea of only the awful and undesirable person not getting married wasn't reality, as Jessie had just justified in great detail herself. She finally nodded. "I don't," she confirmed to James. It was only once she spoke that she fully accepted that about herself. No, she didn't want to tie the knot with anyone. There were certainly people she'd liked quite a bit, but walking down the aisle with them and becoming part of some default structure wasn't her ideal.

Much more fun was doing her own thing. Running around and picking what suited her moment by moment was far more appealing. She could have fun with contests in one moment, drop them to become a supervillain, and then pick them up again as she chose. A variety of people could also be met and interacted with, then turned away from if they treated her as those that had today. The idea of that kind of life had her heart soaring, like flying away in a hot air balloon, while the finality of going along with what was supposed to be wanted felt like it would be more like sinking into a concrete institution.

James's brow creased ever so slightly, but he remained by her, stroking her hand and calm as ever. No matter what he was thinking, she'd told the truth. Admitting it really did feel like it should be a humiliating thing, but Jessie's longtime companion's calm presence and soothing actions seemed to help her stop herself from sinking into that feeling. Instead, she hugged James closely, sinking into his embrace. "I don't care if it's acceptable or not," Jessie muttered as they sat there.

"Of course it is."

Now it was Jessie's turn for incredulity, sitting up and staring at James's face to try and judge what he was saying better. Was he serious? He seemed it, and wasn't the type to joke like this, not that his simple declaration was formatted in a way that might be joking at all. James stared down at her with a grin. "It seems like a completely natural inclination to me," he said. "I've never wanted to get married myself."

The statement was so simple, yet also unbelievable. Then again, was it Jessie that didn't believe it, or was she just channeling the energy of the group from earlier in the day, or even 'truths' that were stated and reinforced everywhere, all the time? Actually, the first inclination was to completely believe James. "Right," Jessie muttered, recalling the sentiments both implied and outright said throughout the long time she'd known him. In fact, she'd never considered James as a candidate to marry herself even while considering others because she'd respected what he said, even with those background doubts.

In the present, maybe she still did wonder if it were really true. "Wait... What about that letter you wrote your fiancée about wanting to marry her?" James tensed slightly before Jessie groaned off the idea herself. "I know, you were maybe eight, of course that doesn't have to dictate the rest of your life." Jessie had also had a list of things she'd like to do at that age, not all of which still appealed to her that day, including marriage. "Yeah, you really don't, do you..." Jessie muttered.

"No," James said while lightly running his hand down her shoulder.

The two of them faced each other, an intimate position allowed even though neither had ever courted the other. Jessie leaned forward and hugged him again, relishing in James as the 'given' she'd perhaps never completely appreciated until right then.

"I admit it does surprise me to hear you express the same."

Oh. Jessie sat up, pulling away from James's hug as he seemingly called her out. She rubbed her eyes - not that she was crying at all - before nodding seriously, admitting guilt. "Striving toward picking up a rich man as a goal seemed like it should be my goal. Even now, as a story it does seem like quite an exciting idea."

"But you don't want it for yourself?" James spoke calmly, his complete, curious attention on her.

"Being around others and celebrating different parts of life is something I desire. But I want that celebration in other ways. A wedding seems like it's something fantastic for someone, but not for me. I don't think I should have to do that - in general, or just as a condition to be happy about my life!"

But it was a prerequisite, wasn't it? Jessie couldn't even join in with that group from the day. Her accomplishments as a coordinator were meaningless, dismissed while some idiot that was just learning about coordinating was paid more mind because she'd met that requirement. And it wasn't just that day - Jessie had gotten such comments and 'jokes' thrown at her constantly over the years. More than once her accomplishments were downplayed as she was told everything else she was involved in must be 'easy'. That side-eye resting on her as a single person happened more and more often as she'd gotten older.

"Of course not." James's tone was steady, not upset at all - in fact his words were flowing with confidence. "No one should have to. It's not a necessity at all. Those who have tried to impose it as such for me I've cut from my life."

With that reference to the family left behind, conceptions of James's path in life wavering along as he hesitated to dedicate himself to the inevitable, conventional, easy conclusions metamorphosed into someone who had firmly made and stuck to a decision that reflected his true desires and intentions. Those thoughts about people who didn't want to get married - maybe a few of them had been had about James himself, even respecting his decision. James hadn't been believed, even as he was really fully accepting her own feelings this day. But James had certainly been completely decided and genuine as he shunned what others said was required for adult life. He'd even made significant sacrifices along the way. How he ended up was part of something sought, not halfheartedly wandered into that needed to eventually be 'fixed'.

Perhaps the same could be said for Jessie herself. Why was she paying mind to the fools that behaved as if she was lacking?

"We can slice away anyone who can't see our value, can't we?" she declared.

"Certainly. Their vision is far too limited. They couldn't even begin to comprehend what it takes to rise the ranks in Team Rocket," James asserted in response.

Jessie and James beamed at each other, suddenly linking their hands again. But even as Jessie seemed to rise out of the swamp she'd been pushed in earlier, some of the muck clung on. "Perhaps they're envious of someone who holds such obvious intrinsic value, and seek to use their hum-drum marriages as a way to put them above others."

"Oh, absolutely Jessie." The still completely confident declaration of James burned away any doubt Jessie may have had in her own words. "You're gorgeous - beyond that, completely vivacious, and have the ability to set yourself to accomplish something. Anyone would envy all you've built up and the talent you show in your various ventures."

Jessie's face grew warm as James showered her with his sincere sentiments. She exhaled in amusement as she stood, filled with the complete sense of confidence that she'd often been able to conjure all on her own, though this time she'd certainly been given her a hand. "You're right, James. I can't believe I allowed such space to the nonsense of those who are truly lacking."

"Hmph." James also stood, stretching, as amused as Jessie.

Though the conversation seemed to be over, the word 'lacking' spiked through Jessie's consciousness, resurrecting a threat that often went along with Jessie and James's conclusions. Jessie turned around, holding her composure. "James," she began, "do you think I- Well, I mean to say, aren't you worried at all?"

"About what, Jessie?"

"Well, don't you worry about being by yourself? Hasn't it been difficult for you to be alone?"

"Oh." James looked down, pausing before he responded, "That was never a concern of mine. I specifically sought to sever myself from that brand of companionship, so I don't worry about its lack."

"Oh. I suppose that makes sense," Jessie said. Of course, if truly believing in that principle, there would be no need to worry about the menace of 'being alone' single people were often taunted with. That was just matter of fact.

"But, you know Jessie, I don't think I'm a fair person to answer that question." James put a hand to his face, which seemed to have acquired a pinkish hue. "After all, though I haven't specifically sought out such a thing, I have ended up with a person I'd like to be with for the rest of my life. And I'm so often spoiled by her company."

Now it was Jessie's turn to get hot, her body immediately increasing by several degrees as James smirked her way. After a moment of shock, she folded her arms. "What is this, James? A confession, perhaps?" she asked in a playful tone.

James moved closer. "What would there be for me to confess to you?" He leaned toward her and whispered, "You've been my partner in nearly all my crimes." As Jessie laughed, he continued, "Including this one."

This crime? Actually, her and James being 'partners' in the way they chose - exchanging both spoken and physical affection with frequency, shacking up together, intertwining their very lives together, and worst of all, being happy about it without even considering the marriage requirement for any of that - yes, this was a complete 'crime' to those who looked down at others for not being married. They may want to forcibly smash them into that mold, or maybe even see James as 'afraid of commitment', though he'd certainly committed himself to being with her along with the various other crimes on their record. Yes, what they had was an absolute treasure, no matter what anyone else might think or tell them they should do.

"Did you want to marry me?" Jessie asked with a teasing tone as she again embraced him, putting her head on his shoulder.

"Never," James whispered back with a smile, snaking his hand into her own. "You've been so important to me, Jessie. With you, I found something I wanted but never knew it. Maybe never thought I could have. I'd rather die than lose that."

"Same here, James," Jessie agreed, staring into his eyes. She imagined a different life, one where maybe she did see James as a possible marriage partner. It might be due to him having been in a wealthy family, the same as she'd day-dreamed about with others. She would have approached him with that thought in mind, like the guy she'd dated had with her. James probably wouldn't have liked her as much, and maybe vice-versa, with them having to deal with the looming demand to enter that institution.

Instead, they'd been able to bond outside of it, in a way that wasn't just equal to, but far superior to that option. Jessie pulled James closer, this time exploding with appreciation for how the two of them had melded together naturally. They were like a binary system of two stars, both falling into place to rotate around a shared center while enjoying the other's warmth and shine. If pulling him closer to forcefully fit themselves into a standard configuration, it may destroy them, much like the collision of such a system.

What they had was a sparkling gem. Jessie's lovely partner, who she could always commiserate with or share physical affection with. Though others may have silly ideas in their head thinking 'if this, then this', regarding both any direction relationships may need to take or someone's worth upon not taking them, they were wrong.

As always, Jessie and James blasted off their own way through the world.

Notes:

More than one person over at the Real Rocketshipping & More server wanted a full fic when I was musing about a scene out of this as an idea when wondering if/how Jessie might lean non-heteronormative the same as James, and they convinced me to write this. Dedicated to all of you. Been working on it a while and thought I'd post it for the occasion. Happy [other] rocketshipping day!

2025 is not only the year of the snake, but continues to be the year of the Jessie for me when it comes to the fic I post, hm?

Hope you enjoyed. Writing this took more out of me than I thought it might. Comments/kudos always appreciated!