Chapter Text
The first normal dream Guren has had since the end of the world was about fish in the sky. They were carps. Graceful and grand each the size of a blimp. And they were gliding alongside as he sat on the backseat of a moving car, white fins against a vast blue shade the color of peace.
When his eyes open, it takes a good few minutes before he knows where he is. Sleeping through the night is a surprisingly rare thing, even weeks after the war has ended. I suppose you could argue it’s his second normal dream in nine years. But as normal as the last one seemed — fetching coal for a cookout with his friends in his hometown — his father had still been alive in it. So had Mahiru. There, across the river, smiling. She hadn’t said a word in that dream, and has been just as silent in the waking world ever since things came to a head weeks ago after he broke the resurrection curse and saved everyone, nearly losing all control in the process.
It was all supposed to be over. He reached his goal at last. After crossing every line there was, he was ready to surrender himself. But then Shinoa was there, coming out of nowhere behind Shinya who cleared her a path with an angry bolt of blue. Shinoa’s voice was shaky but her grip on her scythe was steady and strong, the end of her weapon pinned Guren to the ruins of an altar as she forcibly manifested and slayed Mahiru-noya, completing the exorcism of that which was once her sister.
If you had told the Guren of nine years ago that the tiny Hiiragi sister unconscious in his arms would become the key to his liberation, a key Mahiru protected with everything she had and entrusted to him herself, he wouldn’t have believed it. He doesn’t think that the perfect, prodigy Mahiru would’ve believed it as well. But Shinoa wasn’t a shadow anymore. She has matured and grown into her abilities over the years, under and far beyond Guren’s watchful eye. So much so that in the midst of totally losing himself on the last battlefield, there was still space for surprise to find him. Guren doesn’t quite remember when Shinoa turned sixteen, the same age they were when this all began. And the parallel image of her and the manifested demon, with their ashen hair and amber-red eyes and all the fiery determination heightened by a world’s end, was truly something to behold.
At present, Guren’s still getting used to the silence in his mind, though a week-long coma experiencing nothing but darkness after that last battle certainly helped. He hopes, in whichever present dimension across celestial rivers where her soul has been sent to, that there Mahiru is smiling as well. He thinks he might’ve imagined it; at the last sight of her, manifested before her sister, Guren thinks he might have even seen her real smile.
He’s still thinking about fish and rivers and old and new dreams by the time the moon rises in the sky again. The apartment is decidedly less quiet by now, Mito verbally threatening to launch her controller at Goshi’s head, as he plays a dirty move to break through her stronghold in the new video game they brought over. Shinya’s laugh rings out clear over their antics, and he’s been cheering Mito on while also enabling Goshi’s underhanded tactics, adding to the chaos of the game. Hosting dinner and game night has been a common occurrence since he and his aides have moved out of the barracks and relocated back to the Tokyo apartment after the end of the war. But as a disruption to the usual programming that would find them all piled high together on the sofa by now, Sayuri and Shigure are up and whipping out the pots and pans again to reheat things in the kitchen, despite having just finished washing the dishes ten minutes ago.
“Seriously, what makes you think you can just show up here uninvited?” he asks the mop of black hair that’s just pushed past him in the entryway and gets a stickeye for his troubles from his fair-headed shadow.
“You never sending a formal invite over implies that we’re welcome anytime, no?” Yuu says, full of stupid confidence as always.
“And we brought sliced bread!” Yoichi says, unperturbed, as he leaves his shoes to the side and steps over the threshold into the living room. He hands the loaf to Shinya with a bright smile. “The new baker down our street made them fresh today.”
“Shouldn’t you be bringing gifts for the host?” Guren says from where he’s standing, still holding the door open like an idiot.
“What? Doesn’t Shinya-sama live here?” replies the younger golden-haired Sanguu from the doorway, Shinoa close behind and looking straight at him with a knowing smirk on her face.
Brats.
“I’ll have you know that this has been Ichinose property for over a decade now.”
“Then you might wanna call some maintenance on the elevator. I thought it was gonna lose out on our weight halfway up.” Kimizuki says, last of the pack to enter.
“That’s because you’re all getting fat leeching off of Sayuri’s cooking,” he grumbles.
Shinya laughs from his place on the couch. “Come on, Guren, you say that as if you’re not about to help yourself to a second round of dinner.”
His smile is soft though. Guren has no choice but to shut the door and sulk on the couch next to him.
They don’t talk about it, actually, how Shinya has been sleeping here. Or about how Guren wants to tell him to give it up already and just ditch the guestroom to sleep in his room every night, not just on the difficult ones.
“HA!” Mito jumps up as the screen displays her avatar in a victory sequence, “Serves you right!!”
“Yeah, yeah, sit back down after you refill your drink, we’re having a rematch,” Goshi says wryly. “Hey kids, how’s it going?” he asks the rascals now that he’s finally looked away from the TV screen.
“Good!” They have half their faces stuffed in curry rice bowls, but Yoichi pipes up with some semblance of coherence.
It’s tight, with everyone packed into his apartment like this. There’s no more seats at the dining table where the brats have staked their claim, but still Shigure squeezes her way past Mito who’s headed for the fridge, just to bring Guren a (second) bowl of steaming curry.
She smiles when he thanks her quietly.
“Shinoa is adopting a dog!” Mitsuba says excitedly.
“Oh is that right? Where did you find one, Shinoa-chan?” Shinya asks her.
“I didn’t find her,” she says around a mouthful, “she found me!”
Yuu rolls his eyes but can barely contain his excitement either when he jumps in, “She left her groceries out on the counter and found it eating all the good stuff the next morning.”
“Hmm sounds like a wild one.”
“Yeah, but now she’s learning how to eat out of the bowl that Shinoa has been leaving out daily. She’s been coming in and out of a hole in the wall that hasn’t been patched yet, but I’ve been telling Shinoa to fix it and get a proper doggy door.”
“She might get confused as to why her usual access is blocked off! It’s not like she knows where the front door is.”
“That’s why we’re telling you to hurry up and get her a collar and bed already,” Mitsuba urges.
“Shut up and let us warm up to each other in our own time. Out of all the dogs still left out there this one chose to approach me!” Shinoa replies smugly.
“Yeah, and surprisingly it’s not as rabid as you are.”
“Hey! You—”
“Sayuri, Shigure!” Mito shouts over the noise. “Stop working and come join us for a 2 vs 2 already!”
“Yeah! The kids can clean up after themselves, since they’re making themselves so at home.”
Guren raises an eyebrow at Goshi’s statement. Bold of him to say, having done so himself. Though he settles easily as a new round of gaming begins and the conversation at the dining table turns into a debate over potential dog names.
“You should just name your dog Guren, Shinoa,” Mika says without remorse, “it’s obviously a good fit.”
“Yah, I would, but I’d feel too bad for the dog.”
They dissolve into a fit of giggles as Guren gives them the finger without turning away from the TV screen.
Guren is inwardly pleased. Shinoa adopting a pet and having a real living thing to take care of – not just to keep alive – but to trust her with everything and keep her company all the time? Something to form a unique bond with, aside from her little squad. Something innocent and dumb like a puppy, but loving and joyful, to help soothe the loss of her sister. It’s not the first loss, and it wasn’t quite the same Mahiru by the end of it, but that doesn’t mean it’s easier. A dog. He thinks it’ll be good for her.
Shinya looks at him then and tilts his head slightly. The look that passes between them makes him feel like Shinya’s thinking the exact same thing.
He wonders if his squad ever gets thrown off having Shinoa around so much like this. She’s older now, her face matured by the years and the battles, her hair as ashen as ever. Then again, he reminds himself that his squad has gone much longer without seeing Mahiru, or any manifestations of her. And he also looks at Shinoa, the way her mouth tries to stay mysterious but the knit of her brows and gleam of her eyes express it all. The way that her friends adore her, even as she bickers and loses composure arguing with Mitsuba, the way that even Mika is visibly at ease sitting between her and Yuu, and he doesn’t have to wonder anymore.
The moon is high in the sky by the time he manages to get the kids to leave. Goshi and Mito insist on staying the night, just like old times, arguing they’d planned to sleep over before the party-crashers doubled the group in size. Guren’s no longer surprised by this.
He leaves them to sort out their sleeping arrangements and gets ready for bed. Wordlessly, Shinya turns up in his room, helping him pull back the covers and close the blinds, turning the room down for sleep together. It’s too practiced. And so damn domestic it makes something in his chest ache a little, so Guren focuses on the movements of the ritual and lets the calm wash over him. They don’t need to talk about it.
By the time they’re both in bed, he’s gotten over himself enough to let his arm brush against Shinya’s in the dark. They come together.
“Guren.”
Clear like spring water, Shinya calls to him.
“Shinya,” he blinks. “What is it?”
“Hmm… I was thinking,” the curve of his smile is so, so lovely, “maybe you should get a pet too, like Shinoa-chan.”
“Hah! It’s enough of a ruckus having these brats around,” he says, but he knows he sounds fond. He sees that Shinya hears it as well. Somehow, the blue in his eyes soften a little more.
“You could always get a cat if you want a pet that needs less attention.”
“Of course you’d suggest that, you’re a feline apologist.” Shinya nearly rolls his eyes at this.
“Well, what would you get then?” he asks earnestly.
Guren pauses to think about it.
“… Fish.”
Shinya laughs, and pulls him close. His shining eyes gladly ask Guren to explain himself.
“I would have fish in a pond with flowing water. A beautiful garden like my father used to have, back in our home in Aichi.” His mind flies back to a place from lifetimes ago.
“Maybe I’d let it grow wilder than he did though,” he’s avoiding Shinya’s face, already feeling so vulnerable. His eyes cast down and trace along the skin of Shinya’s neck, his collarbones, the tops of his chest moving with each breath as Guren muses, “maybe a slightly more western style, something less traditional, so I could have more colors and shapes in it. Plants that bloom as well.”
He knows Shinya’s listening, so he keeps talking. This part is a little less easy to say:
“I want a beautiful, pointless, showy garden, and… and I want you all to come over and see it from the living room. I want you to visit my home not because something bad happened, but to come take up space and eat my food and play shogi and video games all day.” How long has it been since he last saw his hometown? A decade? He never thought he could bear to see it again after the end of the world, but now his mind drifts back to its mountains and rivers. It’s been far longer since he dreamed simple dreams like this too.
Shinya’s eyes are shining at him in the dark.
“Well,” he says gently, “it sounds like a lovely thing to grow in a new world.”
They’re quiet for a long moment. Having given voice to this one image of the future he’s always held back from imagining (being an empty vessel for demons and for sin for so long), Guren doesn’t know what to say to that.
“Will you go back to Aichi?”
His brows knit together at Shinya’s question. He replies somewhat tentatively.
“There’s nothing there anymore. There’s no reason for me to go.”
“There’s no reason for you to stay.” Shinya counters, surprising Guren a little.
Oh, he tries to soothe the unexpected sting, so this is what I get for not talking about it, huh. How can there be no reason, when Shinya is here after all, right? And their friends. And Yuu, and the rest of the little brat-pack.
“We won the war,” Shinya continues, ignoring the way Guren bristled slightly at his previous statement and reasoning with him. “We restored what was lost, began rebuilding, and finally eradicated the last of the horsemen. There’s peace. And well, after everything, I don’t think Kureto would stop you at this point in time. Maybe it’s better if you leave his ass now before he can find you a new job.” The corner of his lip quirks up a bit at that.
“…” He knows at some level that Shinya is right.
“Don’t you want to go, if just to see for yourself? You don’t know what’s out there. You reached your goal. When you came to Tokyo in high school, you thought it was the Hiiragi house that you needed to overcome. It was even bigger than that, and you did overcome it.”
Guren smiles a bittersweet little thing at Shinya’s words. He always knows what to say. Guren had come to Tokyo an arrogant boy. His goal was to win and conquer, to gain strength for the Ichinose name and house. Now, there is no more house. Long since there was any space for ego, either. In an unfair, ruined world, Guren’s part in it all, the remnants of guilt he still carries of the sin now absolved, Shinya knows not to use the words conquer, or won. How could they have won if they lost so much? Sacrificed so many lives. But, Guren supposes, they’re still here. Alive. You can’t say they didn’t overcome it. And yet…
“What about you?”
“Hmm… I don’t know, I guess if you left Tokyo to return to Aichi, Sayuri and Shigure will surely go back home with you. ” Home. “I think we’ll wind up having a video game tournament to determine which one among Mito, Goshi, and I will have to learn to cook better.” He’s walking the wide way around the question, but Guren can’t blame him. It’s not like any of them really know what to do with themselves anymore, now that they made it to the other side. “Leaving us high and dry to starve eh, Guren?”
Guren chuckles. He keeps it light but there’s a nervousness brewing in his gut. “As if you lot would let a matter of location stop you from pestering me constantly.”
“Ha! Is that an invitation?”
“What if I said it was?”
“Then it’d be the first you ever offered.”
Guren pinches him and gets an exaggerated shriek for his troubles. “YAHHH!!! Guren-chan~”
He’s not proud of the way his attention snaps to the door for a second in paranoia. These apartment walls aren’t the thickest.
“You are a menace,” he hisses.
“Hehe. You’d be bored without me.”
“Then…” and his tone is softer now, “then, you’ll come with me?” It’s too beseeching. But Guren’ll swallow his pride if it will get Shinya to take him seriously. If things change, how will they keep on not talking about it?
Shinya’s biting his lip now. It’s distracting.
“I… I’ll have to sort things out here first, with the Hiiragi. It won’t be so easy to leave.”
There’s a knot in Guren’s throat. He swallows around it to speak.
“They don’t own you. You shouldn’t have to still appeal to them.” His hand slides to the center of Shinya’s chest, memories of a gap beneath his palm. “Not after everything.”
I’m saying I love you. Please be with me.
Shinya’s hand slides up to cover his.
“I want… I want a freedom that is lasting.” He lets their fingers intertwine against his beating heart. “No more strings attached, not even one. And… it will be for Shinoa’s sake as well.” He looks deep into Guren’s eyes as he speaks with more conviction, “Besides, when have I ever failed to show up after I’ve promised to follow you?”
Guren can’t answer.
Shinya pulls his weak, trembling self closer to him and presses his soft lips to his temple. Guren shuts his eyes to savor the touch.
“Go to Aichi. And talk to Yuu tomorrow morning about your plans. Don’t put it off. If it turns out not to be a place you think you can stay, then we’ll still be here waiting for you and we’ll figure it out. And if it is, then…” he pulls back, and his smile is real and hopeful, “I’ll come help you with your garden.”
Guren smiles back at him wetly.
He falls asleep to Shinya brushing quiet tears from his face.
Notes:
Well that was sappier than I expected. Look at them though! They deserve it, you guys. Also if you think about everything they’ve canonically done for each other in the past, then they can learn to talk like saps after the world is done ending itself too. I still think it would take them time, so that’s why I’m exploring this dynamic of them being together but also still dancing around it in this story. I’ve always been curious about the question of if and after, for everyone.
I was inspired by the scene in the light novel when Guren noticed how beautiful his father’s garden was for the first time and Shinya was there. The only time the squad came to visit him in his hometown was for his father’s funeral. The other scene I mentioned in this chapter as well was the dream he had of everyone having a cookout by the river. I wouldn’t have gotten to see or understand Guren’s gentle side without reading the LNs.
Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it. More to come!
Chapter 2: homecoming
Notes:
Belated happy birthday Guren !!
This chapter hinges on the assumption that communication systems basically broke down following the apocalypse, and the army had limited/ makeshift means of communication just necessary to operate.
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Guren 紅蓮 : means “crimson lotus”
Ichinose 一瀬 : means “one rapid”
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(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Guren feels his heart soar at the first sight of familiar mountain peaks in the distance. He’s driving down the highway bound for Aichi with Sayuri, Shigure, and Narumi, who decided last minute to return to their hometown with them. It’s a strange thing, to feel so hopeful without having to feel so cautious. His body doesn’t know what to do without the high stakes, the fact that if there isn’t anything they can make of it there, he can come back to Tokyo, and they can all figure it out together from there. It’s a little more difficult for him to hold the thought of a positive outcome in his mind: if he decides to stay in Aichi, if Yuu will come to live with him (or rather, successfully convince Mika to), if Shinya, Goshi, and Mito will leave their own clans and continue to follow him as well, and how long it would take them if they do.
Yuu had taken it pretty well. It helps that Guren had extended a very clear invitation this time, but he knew that Yuu wouldn’t immediately go. There’s a lot of moving parts with the peace talks and agreements being drawn up, and Mika, with his close association to both vampirekind and human organizations, is required to attend. Yuu couldn’t leave him, and for all of Mika’s (slowly waning) dislike of him, Guren would never ask him to.
Guren didn’t bother trying to find out if the presence of a lowly Ichinose like him would be welcome, despite all his contributions to the Japanese Imperial Demon Army and their success during the war. He’s still on shaky ground with some of the JIDA executives, having just been cleared of possible collusion with the traitor Mahiru; Hiiragi Shinoa and Hiiragi Shinya spared no effort testifying on his behalf. As of the end of the week, the investigation was officially closed and Guren’s security clearance was issued. Shinya was not about to let him stick around and tempt them to change their minds, just because they can.
The Ichinose have never had that kind of power anyway.
Although, Guren muses, things are different now. He knows he’s meant to pave his own way. He thinks of Shinya’s words, whispered low between them in the night.
“Let me help you take care of things, for once.” Shinya said so sweetly, so earnest. “You’re always taking care of everybody, carrying the weight alone.”
Guren has never been one to let a thing go. It may look like the impossible has happened, but that’s not quite it. What may seem to Kureto and to others like surrender, is what Guren has never been able to really achieve before. Freedom. Not living in servitude under the weight of the Hiiragis’ iron fist, nor Mahiru-Noya’s schemes, nor Ferid or Saito, who always held something lethal over his head. He’s finally breaking free of his bonds. And damn right he’s going to take his family with him.
Shinya promised him he’d help make it so.
He left Tokyo and his place with the JIDA with an understanding between him and Kureto that all the former seraph and Hyakuya orphan experiments will be welcome to live with him in Aichi, and that he is to leave ahead to prepare to receive them at the end of the conferences should they choose to do so. The terms and details will be worked out later; Yuu will be representing his group in the talks and will call the final shots, but Kureto could see the benefits of this arrangement. It seems like the Hiiragi’s old allies and branch families, especially the Shijin, Rikudo, and Hakka, are keen to get past the old Hyakuya mess and jump on new power-grabbing opportunities that come with rebuilding.
He debriefed with Shinya one last time after that meeting while he cleared out his office. “I can work with this,” Shinya nodded. He sounded determined and at ease. “I’ll handle the rest from here.”
Still, Guren felt a bit of separation anxiety leaving him and the others, even though a part of him also feels better they’ll at least be together. They spoke in more detail before he left, of ideal outcomes, and how this would be the best thing for Guren to do, not just for himself (Shinya insisted, knowing that it isn’t enough to get Guren to move) but also for his family. Well, Guren’s never been strongly suited to messy politics anyway. And he’s also probably far too incapable of sitting through all these boring meetings to be able to calmly make his case and get what he wants for the people he cares about.
Best leave it to Shinya and Yuu. He knows they’ll win everyone over, between their intelligence, conviction, and sheer charm. After years fighting himself and his demons to keep a hold of everyone and everything, of them, of using them, Guren’s relieved to relinquish his hold. And he trusts them. Simple as that. Guren wants them to know it. He wants to really be able to take care of his loved ones without having to lie and take and hurt for once. He has protected them, at the end of it all. And now, he wants to give them a good life. Peace.
Peace — Mito and Goshi seem to agree with Shinya that he might find it in Aichi. He thinks back to their parting this morning, when his friends came to see them off. There were a load of other goodbyes after that, when they stopped by where Shinoa’s squad was residing to pick up Narumi on their way out. He hadn’t been able to fully process it all earlier.
“Take care of yourself,” Mito said, “and of the girls too okay?”
“I will,” he’d told her. After a moment’s hesitation: “What about you guys? Will you be okay?”
“We will. Don’t worry your pretty little head over us.” Goshi says with a laugh, clapping his arm with both force and affection.
He smiles, though it feels a little bittersweet on his face. It doesn’t escape them. Mito reaches out.
“Guren, no matter how deserving or not deserving you feel deep inside — of being forgiven, of being free — don’t let anything stop you from finding your peace. Whether you decide to go here or there, you know that you only need to give us the signal. We’ll be right there with you.”
He’s nodding, and fighting both the feeling of empty and of overflow. “I know.”
Mito gives him a small smile. “This will be good for you. You need to stop looking over your shoulder at us as if we’ll disappear.” His eyes dart to where silver hair leans down to accept Shigure and Sayuri’s hugs before he can help it. “It’s become a habit, understandably, but it’s no longer serving you. A different environment will help you heal.”
“She’s right,” Goshi says. “And what better place to try first than your home? Way less stuffy than what we got over here, from what I remember.”
“And way less annoying pricks.”
They’ve followed him to hell and back, turned their backs against everyone a decade ago, to go wherever he went. He couldn’t possibly ask for more. He thinks of how he’s paid them for their trust with lies for years, and how he was still forgiven. If it hurts to leave, this must be part of some sort of penance.
Goshi looks at him and says, “It’s not a permanent thing, Guren. You won’t see us for maybe days, maybe weeks, but we’ll be right here.” Guren holds on to that.
“And don’t worry too much,” Mito adds, “we’ll take care of Shinya.” He could only squeeze her hands back and nod.
After a last round of tearless goodbyes and see you soons, Mito and Goshi turn to give their well wishes to Sayuri and Shigure. Shinya swaps places with them and the world narrows at the sight of him, his silver hair glinting in the morning light, and eyes bluer than he knows the sky will be, even on such a clear day. Guren doesn’t want to say goodbye.
“I have something for you,” he says instead, digging around his pocket.
“Oh,” Shinya’s look of mild surprise softens his face.
He takes his palm in his hands, turns it over, and places something weighted in it. It’s folded in cloth. He doesn’t pull back completely; instead, he cups his own hands under the back of Shinya’s. They’re standing close, foreheads touching as they look down at their hands together. Guren peels back the fabric carefully. When the last fold is pulled away, he hears Shinya’ breath catch.
It’s a beautiful thing, exquisitely crafted.
Cupped in their palms is an oval disk made of polished silver. An intricate design with a motif of water flowing down a stream is inlaid with white shells reflecting iridescent flecks of light and carved blue stone with purple accents.
Shinya’s voice is filled with admiration, “It’s…”
“It’s an obi dome brooch,” Guren says. He swallows audibly, turning the piece over to show Shinya the back. “There’s a pin here, aside from the traditional loops, so it can be worn however you like if you’re not wearing a kimono. I’ve imbued it with spells. When you come to my home, wear it. The land and the wards will recognize you, and welcome you.”
“It’s beautiful. Thank you, Guren.” Shinya says softly. He tilts his head slightly to nudge at his. Guren’s heart aches with fondness.
Mito, Goshi, Sayuri, and Shigure are too intentionally not looking their way, and continue carrying a light conversation as if they are paying no mind. It’s one that can drag on for a while or end right here, depending on how much longer Shinya and Guren need with each other. But he can’t do anything more, here, like this. So he presses up to Shinya with one last touch, before pulling back to look at him.
He’s putting on a brave face, so Guren respects it and trusts in him. In them. Reminds himself there’s no need to memorize how Shinya looks in this moment, because they’ll see each other again soon.
He does anyway, because he’s so stunning in this light.
Shinya doesn’t tease him for looking, only gives him a bright smile. He catalogues this too, to keep. Then, Guren wraps the obi dome back up and slips it into Shinya’s breast pocket. His hand lingers on Shinya’s chest for a moment more.
He musters up the confidence that they won’t be apart for too long and sharpens it to belief. Tries to step out of this tender moment with some care.
“So… don’t break into my house this time, when you come.”
Shinya blinks, then grins back at him.
“I’ll try to refrain from the urge.”
And that’s where they left it at. Since when have they gotten so careful with each other, with this thing between them? He supposes that a certain degree of desperation has vanished along with the threat of the end of existence. Now, they’re faced with a novel question, what if they had all the time? A life together?
It’s a pleasant thought.
Guren spots the road signs that signal an upcoming exit and brings his attention fully back on the road and present moment. Before long, they're cruising down the ramp, highway narrowing into streets that look familiar, as if from a dream he had long ago.
Sayuri exclaims and points ahead at a familiar sign, “Look! There’s the first marker!”
Guren makes the turn, and a few short minutes later, they’re pulling up to a familiar gate, white walls dusty from the years they housed only ghosts. Narumi is out the door before Guren has even shifted gears to park, and Sayuri and Shigure are not far behind.
The air is sweet and crisp when he gets out of the car, and it surprises him. He feels bowled over by such a simple sensorial experience. It feels as if he is hearing the voice of a long lost mother.
Sayuri and Shigure are holding hands as they stand on the stone path before him. Up ahead, Narumi already has a blade out and is cutting through the overgrown underbrush, ever-enthusiastic. He sees an image of their younger selves juxtaposed over the sight in front of him.
When his girls turn to look at him, it’s somehow still the same young eyes that meet his.
He’s told them many times before that they’re past using honorifics with each other, but even his own heart pangs at the nostalgia in Shigure’s voice when she speaks.
“Ichinose Guren-sama,” tears are gathered in the corner of her eyes, but her voice carries laughter too.
“We're home.”
He didn’t realize how free he would feel away from the suffocating structures of Tokyo and the remnants of its powerful houses. The shadows of the Hyakuya and Hiiragi sects that never really leave. They’re in the shadows of the ruined, decrepit buildings, in the night, at the edges of some dreams.
Aichi had never had structures as tall and imposing as Tokyo. And his home is up in the highlands, a bit of ways from Nagoya. The degree of desolation feels dampened. Rather than destroyed, the place feels more like nature has just overgrown, left wild and unchecked over the years. As they scope out further away from the Ichinose compound, they find more signs of life, even encountering a small community of people near town. After introduction and some light questioning, they welcome him and his family back to Aichi warmly, giving him some yields of root crops and vegetables from their farms.
While Kureto and remaining powers struggle for a place in the newly rebuilding systems of the world, he thinks that Aichi would be a fine place to bring his family, and protect them still. Let them all live in some fucking peace. Draw circle in the ground and tell everyone outside his precious ones to fuck off.
So after settling into his former home where he grew up, he and Shigure get to revisiting the wards, seeing what’s active and what needs to be bolstered. Sayuri and Narumi take stock of the condition of the rest of the structures within the Ichinose compound. They get together in the main house’s dining room for a simple but homey dinner, discussing their findings, and if there’s a hint of sadness or wistfulness in their tones, they soothe each other with promising things.
After their evening meal, when he’s retired not to his old room, but to the one that had always been meant for the master and lady of the house, he sets to writing to Shinya first. It’s brief.
Major General, My Dear Shinya,
I’m staying. Come soon.
I miss y It’s a fitting place for a sanctuary, just like we’d talk about in my apartment on late nights. So, bring our family friends when you’re done there. If they want.
Yours,
Guren
After a bit of consideration, he adds a postscript.
PS: Kureto if you’re somehow reading this, you’re not included. Fuck off
… It’ll do. He sounds so presumptuous (he is) and feels incredibly selfish asking Shinya to come just like that, but he thinks of Shinya’s words in the night and chooses again to trust his decisions.
He told him, when have I ever failed to show up after I’ve promised to follow you?
Guren stares wistfully out the window at the night sky for a few long moments, wondering if Shinya sees the same half moon he’s seeing right now. Then, shaking himself out of it, he picks up a new blank sheet and drafts up some plans to go over with Narumi, Sayuri, and Shigure tomorrow.
After a mere 3 exchanges between Guren and Shinya over the span of a whole month, Guren concedes that the post between Aichi and other prefectures is slow enough to kill him, probably.
Guren realizes he has no number to call. At least, not directly. All their phones had been work-issued. They’ve lost and broken several of them, and after a certain point, ditched them knowing it was all bugged by the JIDA. Guren questions his decision to leave Tokyo with such haste. His saving grace was that Yuu had given him a new cellphone, after much complaining about how Guren supposedly lives like a grandpa. He thumbs Yuu’s contact in his extremely sparse contacts page and gets Yuu to get him Shinya’s number.
“Are you stupid? How could you not have your own boyfriend's number?”
Guren is regretting it. I should’ve tried to reach Goshi or Mito instead, through Sayuri. Though he thinks he can deal better with one little brat giving him a hard time than being perceived by the other four.
“Never needed it, we called each other on our work phones and relied on JIDA channels to dispatch messages. Also, he’s not my boyfriend.”
“Yet! Seriously Guren,” Yuu’s voice is whiny over the phone, “I don’t know how anyone around thinks that you got game.”
“… I’m revoking your stay-over privileges. Don’t come in August.”
“What?! That is so low, Guren!”
“You’re asking for it,” he says testily.
“Fine, I’ll get you Shinya-san’s number.”
“… Thanks.”
“But I’m asking Shinoa for it!”
“You brat, no!”
“What? Would you rather have the guy know that you got zero game?”
“…”
“Thought so.”
The number that Shinoa gives Yuu to give him is a landline. Unfortunately, he’s in no position to complain, so he makes do with what he's got. He recognizes that the fair-haired Hiiragi siblings must be taking extra precaution communicating through secure wire as they navigate conferences and negotiations, as the JIDA surely has access to most (if not all) of the wireless signals in the area. Guren tries to appreciate the access and privacy that Shinoa is granting him, but somehow he also can't help but feel like he's being teased even from miles away.
He puts off calling Shinya for a whole four days to fix the phone lines that branch off the main street.
When he finally works up the courage to give him a call, he thinks he’s losing his mind. He punches the numbers into the old telephone in the living room and looks out across the overgrown garden in an attempt to calm himself.
He takes a deep breath as it starts to ring.
Four rings now. Five, Six. The thudding in his chest picks up.
“Hello?”
“Hey. Uh, it's me.”
“… Guren?”
He clears his throat that’s suddenly gone dry. Oh, how he’s missed this voice. “How have you been, Shinya?”
Shinya's genuine delight sounds like chiming bells. It's one of Guren's favorite kinds of laughs from him. “I’ve been well,” there’s some rustling on the other side of the line. “It’s getting warm fast here in Tokyo. How are you?”
Guren can feel the corner of his lips lift into a smile in spite of all this ridiculous small talk. Still, “I’m good, things are fine here in Aichi. Not any worse than we expected. We’d been getting out and doing a lot of work.”
“That’s wonderful,” he can hear Shinya's smile in it, see his expression in his mind’s eye. “Actually, it's funny that you called,” Shinya continues, “I was just going to reply to your last letter. I'm looking at it right now.”
“Oh, is that so?” Guren replies, “I was starting to think it got lost in the void.”
“Mhm, it arrived today. When did you send it out? Really Guren, for a military officer, one would think you'd be better about remembering to write the date down in your correspondence.”
“Former military officer,” he corrects.
A sigh, “I’m rolling my eyes at you right now.”
They fall into easy conversation, about the state of things, how Mito and Goshi are doing. Guren tells him about the nest of wild hares he found in the garden. How he had to evict and relocate them out to the gardens in the back. About the state of the library, details of the place he’s overwhelmed to find he recognizes, but had forgotten for years.
They start talking on the phone regularly. It never bothers Guren that he does most of the calling, because Shinya never leaves Guren to wait at the other end of the line for as long as the first time.
Shinya reaches out first in other ways. He’s extremely sharp, Guren’s sure he’s caught on to the fact that he’s only been calling him on the phone, but he’s happy Shinya plays along, like he always does with him. Eventually, he gets a text from a random number:
In case you need to reach me outside our usual times >3< I’m not gonna be in much of next week.
-S
Guren tries to figure out how to send a rolling eyes emoticon before he gives up, and replies with a lame, Thanks. Sleep well.
Still, they don’t really shift over to texting, tending to save it all up for when they’re able to talk on the phone. He likes listening to Shinya’s voice. Something about the cord makes Guren feel a little more tethered. A little more casual too; he likes the minor inconvenience of it. It creates room for intentionality. It doesn’t remind him of work, of Kureto’s absolute orders finding him anywhere and everywhere, of stilted calls and commands he’s had to give and take. Plus, the analog makes things feel a little more mundane and normal — and, sue him, a little old-school romantic.
He often looks out over the progress in the garden while he’s talking to Shinya, giving him updates on Narumi’s progress with the census, and improvements he’s making with Sayuri and Shigure in other areas of the compound. How they restored Shigure’s childhood home, and his two aides have taken a liking to staying in the main bedroom there. Guren stops himself from saying, now you come and move in with me.
But they talk about space and accommodations anyway, just grazing the topic under the guise of logistics. About which house they’re thinking of rehabilitating next, how many rooms there are, who will be arriving with Yuu next month, and how they’re all to fit between the first two houses if the guesthouse is not ready.
He listens with rapt attention to Shinya’s voice lilting over updates on Shinoa’s squad, always mentioning what Yuu has been getting up to before he can ask, and little allusions to the things Shinya’s doing to untangle himself from the Hiiragi for good. They talk a bit about Aichi’s resources and potential. Pre-existing industries that the restored people have had no problem starting back up. How to make it an attractive place for relocation, a better place for young ones, for the academic and scientific community, and maybe even more so for those turned, for Mika. If it would be sanctioned based on how the Accords are shaping up, and how they would manage it.
Day by day, ever since coming here, Guren can see the future take shape a little more. It was unimaginable at first. But the little seed of hope has sprung in his heart. And he indulges his fantasies with Shinya, as they give it real shape together. They discuss things that Guren can take action on and physically prepare next, while Shinya primes protections, policies, bargaining chips in the peace talks. No longer some impossible dream they whisper tentatively about in the dark under the covers in his Tokyo apartment, but starting to turn possibilities into realities, trading war strategies for community planning. It’s sickeningly pure.
It's not always things like that though. Often, it's a lot of little things they share with each other. How Guren has cleared the overgrown garden. How he's laying it all out first, mapping out which areas will be covered in grass versus sand and pebbles. How he's digging out where the pond will go and if Shinya thinks if the depth is good.
Shinya tells him of new dishes he's been learning to cook, and of meeting Shinoa's little puppy. She's named it Pochi for its little spots. Guren laughs endearingly at such a basic choice, and Shinya threatens to tell Shinoa. He warns him she's training him to growl on command on top of all the cute little doggy tricks, and now does so almost automatically at the sight of Kureto, to Kueto's great annoyance. They laugh together at his expense.
The conversation flits effortlessly to the books they’re reading. Unexpected finds Guren’s made around the estate. Books on folklore and history. Romance and spellcraft. They make lists together on the volumes that Guren didn’t take with him and can’t find any copies of here. Guren warming at the implication that Shinya will collect them and bring them with him when he comes. Whenever he comes.
He squashes the whisper of doubt and lovesick hope, and tells him eagerly about the volume on Ichinose spellcraft that he found last night that he thinks Shinya will enjoy.
They talk, and it’s good.
But on nights when the moon is high and lonely in the sky, when Guren misses him a little more than usual, he gives in and texts him goodnight.
And no matter how late it comes, Shinya always replies.
A few weeks have passed since they’ve started this; one evening, Guren calls Shinya a little earlier than usual. He catches him in a bit of a hectic frenzy.
Shinya sounds out of breath when he answers. There’s the sound of a timer going off in the background, the distant humming of a kitchen exhaust, and the steady clipping of a knife against wood as he slices through what Guren’s guessing is firm vegetable.
“Hey. Bad time?” He asks, eyebrow raising at the timer still ringing at the other end of the line.
“Oh, no, it’s fine! I’m just uh- one second-” there’s some fussing and clanging for a moment, followed by the beep of the timer stopping. Guren can hear Shinya basically huffing through the slight static of the phone. “Ahaha, just making dinner, that’s all.”
“Sounds like quite an affair.” Guren pictures him in the kitchen, dragging the landline in from its usual place, cord stretching as far as it can reach so he can pin the phone between his ear and shoulder, all while his delicate hands keep busy between managing pots already hot on the stove and half-finished prep on the counter. “Are you expecting people over tonight? Mito? Goshi?”
“No, nothing like that, though we have plans to meet for drinks tomorrow. I just wanted to make a nice meal, something warm and comforting. And a bit more challenging than the usual. Bread with jam hasn’t quite been cutting it lately.” Guren laughs a little at that, endeared. “I figured maybe my brain might actually need the opposite of quick and easy,” Shinya says, “something more involved to help me decompress better after a long day. To stop thinking.”
Guren hums in agreement, sympathizes. Gardening has been doing that for him a lot lately; keeping his hands that are so used to wielding weapons busy. He hears a scrape, and something hissing aggressively into steam.
“I can call you back later, I just wanted to say hi,” he admits. A voice in his head suspiciously sounding like Yuu calls him a lame-o. Guren disregards it. If he called Shinya even half as much as he thought of him, they’d both never get any work done. And then how is he supposed to settle everything and come be with him for real?
“No, it’s fine. I can multi-task.”
“You can, but maybe you shouldn’t. Focus on not sending yourself to the infirmary doing something stupid, idiot. It'd be embarrassing to have survived a war and lose your fingers to a kitchen knife.”
“Ever the believer of my abilities, aren't you sweet?”
Guren hears a resounding clang, and Shinya yelp. They’re silent for a second as the steel’s echoes ring over the line. He lets the pause sit heavy between them, further emphasizing his case before he speaks again.
“I'll call you after dinner.”
“Yes. Yes, okay. An hour from now should work for me.”
“No damage?” he checks, just to make sure.
“No damage.” Shinya assures him.
“Okay, talk to you in a while,” he says in soft and rounded tones this time. They're still talking but Guren misses him already. Misses him all the time.
“Yes, talk to you in a bit,” he replies. Guren loathes to put the phone down, but figures that Shinya who picked up his call in the middle of such chaos wouldn't likely be hanging up first. When he places the phone back into the receiver, Sayuri is literally just standing there grinning at him like a cheshire cat.
He raises a brow at her.
“What?”
“Nothing,” but she’s giggling into her hand. “It’s just really cute to see you chasing, for once.”
“The fuck is that supposed to mean?”
Shigure jumps in from the doorway. “Who would’ve thought, eh Sayuri? Guren the heartthrob, playing cat and mouse.”
He tries to speak in an even, almost placating tone.
“It's not like that.”
“Mhmm~”
“No seriously.”
“Of course, of course, Guren-sama.”
“Stop smiling like that.”
“It’s hard when you were twirling the landline cord around like a schoolgirl with a crush.” Shigure snickers, for God’s sake, and Sayuri is now straight-up grinning evilly.
Ugh. Girls. They’ve gotten even more comfortable speaking freely with him since the war ended.
“Shinya and I have known each other for so long,” he tries to reason out. “There’s no reason for us to act like timid teenagers with each other.”
“Mm, exactly,” Shigure starts. “Which is why it’s funnier that you are acting that way. How old are you again?”
“Fuck off!”
“Keep digging your own grave, Guren. You know you’re just proving our point right?”
He scoffs. “You both suck.”
“Oh stop sulking,” Sayuri says lightly, “Shinya obviously likes it too.”
They giggle at him. He doesn’t deign that warrants a response and gets to putting away the groceries instead, with his face warm-blushed from their teasing.
Shinya has been elusive the past week.
Guren understands that he’s been busy. There are places for him to be. But after a trying week with minimal contact, it felt especially difficult today. Their morning call barely lasted 3 minutes, and it was the only instance they had spoken all day. Sayuri and Shigure stayed up late with him playing games, and he could feel their efforts to keep his mind busy. But he didn’t know what to do with himself after that.
He tosses and turns in his big, empty bed, wondering why he can’t seem to rest, even though the night is deep. Illumination is missing from the sky.
It’s a new moon.
After several hours of flitting between consciousness and murky dreams, Guren resigns himself to a restless night. When he senses that morning has come, he rises and washes up, trying to splash the sleeplessness from his face. Maybe he’ll do some gardening to keep his hands busy.
He steps out of his room, and immediately smells pancakes wafting over from the direction of the kitchen and smiles. It’s earlier than usual. It seems like Sayuri and Shigure have noticed his mood from yesterday.
When he rounds the corridor, he stumbles over a duffel bag on the floor and curses loudly.
That wasn’t there last night.
There’s a blonde over at the stove. The bow of an apron looks out-of-place over a wide lower back.
That’s not Sayuri.
“Guren!”
It’s Goshi.
What the fuck?
“I hope you don’t mind us helping ourselves, we’ve been driving non-stop the whole night, took a wrong turn about midway through Yamanashi. I didn’t realize till Mito woke up from her beauty nap and re-navigated.”
His sleep-deprived brain was not making sense of this.
“Goshi…?”
Mito was suddenly there too, right beside him. She drops some heavy boxes from her strong arms with a loud thud, further cluttering his space.
“Good morning, sleepyhead. Miss us?” She pinches his cheeks.
He swats at her somewhat sluggishly, the sleep starting to leave his body.
A dream? This is not a dream. The sting of his cheeks and pain from where he stubbed his toe after tripping tells him otherwise. An illusion then? How else could they be here?
His eyes drift towards a familiar silver and blue-inlaid oval on the kitchen counter. It gleams at him. Guren feels himself wake up.
They’re here.
Mito proceeds to shuffle bags and boxes around his living room while Goshi moves about his kitchen to transfer over a slightly burnt pancake onto the plate next to it. Looking ridiculous in that apron, he follows Guren’s eyes.
“Shinya is out in the garden,” he says, a hint sly.
When Guren steps outside, he revisits the idea that this might be an illusion.
Because Shinya is there.
He is there. Against the daybreak. Hair a shock of silver, pristine, and yet, he is dirtying himself. Bending over the pond and sticking his hands in it, all the way up over his forearms, just past his elbows. Guren calls out to him.
“You better not be messing with my fish.”
A splash.
Then, blue eyes meet his.
Finally.
Shinya laughs. He waves at him in that cute way he sometimes does. Water is running down his arms, and his hands are so muddy.
Guren walks over to him, smiling back. He stops short right before him.
There are lotus in the pond that weren’t there last night. The round leaves are bright green and matured, and flowers crown the bends of graceful stems rising out of the water. Their petals are crimson red.
“What the hell is that?”
“My gift for the host.”
“What?”
“It’s lotus.”
He knows, but doesn’t get it. He kneels down next to Shinya and reaches over to stroke gently at a bloom.
“Why are they here?"
“Why wouldn’t they be? I brought them of course. Thank me at any time.”
He wants to ask, where did you get them from? Why did you go through the trouble transporting grown ones? When did you even get here? Why did you get your hands dirty, planting this for me? But he doesn’t. His mind is racing too fast, and he can’t catch a thought.
“Do you not like them?” Shinya asks cautiously.
“No! No, it’s not that. They’re lovely. Just…” Guren squirms, he doesn’t know how to explain it.
“They’re just a little corny, that’s all.” And they are, but Guren doesn’t really mean it like that. What he means is that they’re really thoughtful and sweet, it’s overwhelming him. He does not think himself the type of man who deserves the gift or the effort.
Shinya presses his lips together and sits back on his heels, wiping his soiled hands mindlessly over his trousers and failing to get any cleaner. His gaze is studying Guren’s face intently. Guren can feel it, even as he stares resolutely at the ripples the fish make when they come up close to the surface, then dart away under the shade of the lotus leaves. The sunrise paints the surface of the water a fiery orange. The crimson looks gorgeous against it.
“Guren,” Shinya says, his fingers at Guren’s chin all of a sudden, turning his head to face him, “ask me again.”
Guren blinks at him, “Ask you what again?”
“Ask me why.”
“Okay, why did you bring these here, Shinya?”
He feels pinned by the sniper’s gaze. Shinya’s got him exactly where he wants him. Guren is afraid of what’s next. He feels his heartbeat thudding against his chest.
“Because the red lotus speaks the language of all the deep emotions that make us human. It symbolizes compassion and purity of heart. It’s not just beautiful, but captivating and resilient. It’s here because the lotus grows out of murky waters from the darkest depths of the mud towards the light, into something beautiful. It’s untainted by the mire, and all the more beautiful for it.”
Shinya’s serious blues are gazing at him too intently for him to misunderstand. He’s not talking about the damn plants anymore. Guren’s pathetic little heart is filled with so much hope it might explode.
The corner of Shinya’s lips quirk up into a small smile.
“And, because they’re my favorite, Ichinose Guren.”
Shinya tugs him forward by the chin, just the slightest bit, and Guren gives in to every last feeling of want that’s lived in his body for the better part of the last decade and leans in.
He pauses at the last moment, looks up from Shinya’s lips to see his delicate lashes flutter against his soft skin, the rising sun casting his silver in a dance of gold. He closes his eyes, along with the last breath of space between them.
Guren kisses him. Shinya’s lips are warm and soft underneath his own. They move against each other, and he tilts his head to deepen the kiss, holding Shinya’s jaw steady in his hands. He tastes like salvation. Like coming home. He’s fragrant as fresh lotus blooms that Guren imagines were caressing his pale face on the car ride here, home to him. He caresses that cheek with a thumb now too, as he tenderly kisses the plush lips he’s been dreaming of over and over. The heat of him has currents spreading all throughout his body, radiating from the places they touch, waking him up and making him feel alive.
They pull apart, breathless. He notices some mud near Shinya’s chin, and rubs it away gently. It’s then that he realizes how muddy he is, from Shinya’s roaming hands. There’s mud all over robes, his neck, and chin.
“… Sorry,” Shinya says, not sounding sorry at all. He’s trying and failing to suppress his smile.
Guren tilts his head back and laughs. And when he leans back in to kiss him again, Shinya meets him halfway.
It’s everything and more.
An outline of daylight finds four friends gazing towards the garden…
Inside, Sayuri and Shigure are back from seeing Yuu, Shinoa, and the other youngsters (all nearly asleep on their feet) to the guesthouse. They insisted it was too early for both parties; they could say hi to Guren later when everyone was properly awake.
It’s a good thing too, the four are thinking now.
“It’s like they’re trying to have each other for breakfast.”
Mito and Shigure grimace at Sayuri’s choice of words.
“Well,” Goshi says, shrugging, a plate in hand. “More pancakes for us.”
Notes:
The little letter bit in this chapter is inspired by the fic “lovers of the night” by fikcitupret. It’s part 1 of a whole series. The last part, “we nearly drowned for such a silly thing” explores gureshin post-canon in a very nuanced and emotionally-loaded way. Now that I think of it, this fic wouldn’t exist if I hadn’t read that amazing piece. Find part 1-7 of that series here: https://archive.transformativeworks.org/series/2394745
I'd love to hear in the comments what you think gureshin’s love languages would be, outside of undying devotion, doing stupid shit to save the other, and abysmal communication.
Maybe a hot take but Shinya would make a better lawyer than Guren would, so I sent off Guren to the province to take up gardening instead. Haha. He’s preparing the house for when wifu comes home. Househusband Guren x breadwinner Shinya agenda. Give Shinya all the bread. Although in reality, Guren seems the type to embrace responsibility (at least in the light novels this personal quality read so very strongly), so he tried to set things up before leaving and naturally got to work while waiting for Shinya to come home to him. They’re a power couple, complementary even in their new roles in different places.
Depending on my activity over the next few weeks, it might take me a little longer to get the next chapter out, but I hope you enjoyed this substantially longer one. I have a draft of something inspired by the meaning of Shinya’s name, but I’m undecided about posting. If I do, it will probably be shared as an excerpt/ part 2 to this series.
Thanks for reading!
Emily_hamerson on Chapter 1 Sat 30 Aug 2025 07:07PM UTC
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sonderette on Chapter 1 Mon 01 Sep 2025 03:28PM UTC
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Skellyman on Chapter 1 Wed 03 Sep 2025 07:37AM UTC
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sonderette on Chapter 1 Thu 04 Sep 2025 04:35AM UTC
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