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The clack of a keyboard woke him up.
Junkrat blinked his eyes drearily, trying to focus on the dark figure leaning over the keyboard beside him. A face came into focus: curved nose, sharp black eyes, soft lips that just begged to be kissed and--
He blinked again. Twice more, for good measure. This was not shaping up in his immediate favor. Junkrat straightened up, now fully focused on the woman typing beside him, and opened his mouth to woo the dame with some elegantly placed words:
"Oi, and who the fuck do you exactly think you is?"
Real stellar job right there, Rat.
The woman turned to him, and Junkrat was caught in a glare that exuded pure death, if that was even possible. She made it possible. Definitely possible.
"Glad to see you've finally awoken, Mr. Fawkes," she remarked disdainfully. "I am Satya Viswani, one of your team members for the duration of your time with Overwatch. You may call me Symmetra if you so please."
"I do please," he retorted. "And call me Jamie, or Junkrat at the least. Mr. Fawkes makes me feel like one of them suits." He shuddered for effect.
"Duly noted, Mr. Fawkes."
Well, wasn't she just a bundle of friendliness.
He leaned back in his chair, watching as this Symmetra lady furiously tapped away at the keys, brows furrowed. It was a pretty cute look on her. Not sustaining that he'd somehow managed to piss her off within a minute of interaction, but hey, whatever. Rat stared at the holoscreen in front of the two of them as she sifted through portfolios of their various teammates. Right. This whole Overwatch business. When him and Roadhog had signed up for this bullshit, they were expecting political asylum while they plotted out their next heist. He was not expecting to play superhero for some goody-two shoes team trying to change the world. For fuck's sake, there was a dame named Mercy on the team. Mercy. This was a little too much idealistic garbage for his tastes, thank you very much. Yet here they were, and here he was, being stared down by a frighteningly attractive Indian woman. He supposed things could be worse.
"Listen, Sheila, what's your deal? I ain't gonna bite or nothing." He flashed a toothy grin.
"Either contribute to the current situation at hand or get out," she stated coldly.
"Alright, no need to get feisty. I'll piss off." He hopped out of the swivel chair and hobbled over to the door, eyeing her as she huffed and turned back to her station. Right bitch, that one was. He might be in love.
----
"And then, she sassed me," he complained to Roadhog, who grunted in disbelief. Not a big talker, but Rat loved the big lug all the same. "All, 'Duly noted, Mr. Fawkes', like what's her damage? I ain't done nothing to her. She's awful pretty though. Long hair and nice curves and God, Hog, those eyes....." He sighed. She was an enigma, Symmmetra. He had seen her a nice sum of four times since their initial meeting, and each interaction went arguably worse than the last. It was like his entire existence seemed to piss her off. That was only supposed to happen with the police and the occasional grocery store manager. Not with people like her.
"But c'est la vie and all that horseshit." Junkrat hefted himself off Roadhog's lap, heading off to the breakfast nook. Why they had a breakfast nook, he couldn't be assed to figure out. Rat took in a survey of the faces in the room once he arrived: Pharah, Hanzo...Symmetra.
He could practically feel the tension in the room dip itself in gasoline and burst into flame. The others seemed to feel it too, as they quickly made excuses to make their leave, putting Junkrat in the wonderful position of being alone with Miss Viswani. He eyed her cautiously, before grabbing a yogurt cup and sliding it over to her.
"What is this for?" She looked it over with a mixture of curiosity and amusement.
"Apology yogurt. For doing whatever the hell I've done to shove a stick up your ass." He looked at the floor, awaiting a response. Symmetra gave him a surprised once-over.
"I do not bear any ill will against you."
"Yeah? Could've fooled me," he muttered. "Then say, what's it with looking at me like the leftover cream in an empty cuppa flat white?" She let out a soft sigh and looked down at her hands.
"I understand I have been a bit harsh with you. I apologize for that. I do not...I do not think of you as a bad person. I just do not have the trust in you that I can from other team members. You are elusive. And...prone to explosion. But that does not mean I do not wish to attempt a friendship."
"Well that's more like it!" He grinned. Best to take the open opportunity and run with it. "Let's start with the basics. What's your favorite colour? Blue? I'm guessing it's blue. Guess what mine is."
"Orange?"
"How'd you know?"
"Lucky guess," she dryly remarked, glancing once again at his vibrant orange prosthetics.
They spent the rest of the morning making small talk, mostly directed by Junkrat. He told her about his time as a Junker in the outback, and his most impressive heists (she was totally impressed, he was positive). She told him about life as a young girl in the urban sprawl of Utopaea, and he hung on to every word she spoke. By the time they had run out of topics to discuss, it was already noon, and the two of them were completely exhausted and utterly starved. Rat invited Symmetra to join him and Hog for lunch, and to his surprise, she accepted. He let a wide grin creep up on his face. Things were coming up explodey.
-----
From then on, it got a lot more cheery at the base. Every day was a new day to spend with her. Symmetra would pass by on her way to a meeting and he'd fall into step beside her, chatting about the weather or something trivial. He'd slide his tray next to hers for lunch and they'd spend the afternoon in vigorous debates. He even--and it made his scrawny little heart soar-- even got to wish her goodnight some nights, and see her smile and wish him a soft "goodnight, Jamie" in turn. He felt giddy and fizzy and bright, like a hand grenade freshly launched. It was exhilarating.
One morning, Junkrat waited outside for Symmetra to walk by, but when she did, she wasn't alone. The broad figure of Hanzo Shimada presented himself on her left side, startling Junkrat out of his daydreams.
"Ah, Jamie!" She smiled. "I am sure you are acquainted with Shimada. He and I will be working together for some time to plan out new techniques for our next mission."
"Oh, that's perfectly right by me," he responded. It was very much not perfectly right by him, but really, what choice did he have? Junkrat fell into step beside them, trying his best to keep up with their pace. They chattered on and on about all sorts of boring analytical shit, and Rat felt himself grow more jealous by the minute. How come she was smiling so much at Hanzo? He wasn't such hot stuff. Anyone could spit some jargon about attack stances and offensive structures. Probably. And what was Shimada's deal, showing off those muscles? Plain boastful, if you asked him. Hanzo wasn't perfect.
-----
Hanzo was perfect. Stupid handsome Japanese men.
Every time Rat met with Symmetra, Hanzo was there. Eating lunch? Hanzo was there. Going for a walk? Hanzo was there. The last straw occurred when Junkrat went to wish her goodnight,and lo and behold, that oaf was standing there too.
"Goodnight!" They called to her at the same time. Rat scowled.
"Goodnight, Shimada. Goodnight, Fawkes." Junkrat nearly screamed. The urge to explode tall warrior clan members who steal your not-girlfriend was very great sometimes.
-----
A couple of afternoons later, Junkrat slid into Symmetra's booth, expecting Hanzo to join them, but to his surprise, the lout didn't arrive.
"Hanzo and I have finished our planning," Symmetra clarified. Junkrat may or may not have done an internal victory dance.
They ate in silence for a while, before she looked up to meet his eyes.
"Could I ask you a question?"
"Fire away, Sheila."
"How do you know when you...are experiencing attraction?" Oh, no.
"Come again? Could it be that the great Satya Viswani has a crush?" Junkrat struggled to maintain his grin.
"...Possibly." Oh, god.
"Well, don't leave me hanging here. Give me all the details!" If it was who he thought it was, he didn't want the details.
"W-well, he's handsome, and he's funny, and he has a very interesting background." She blushed, as Junkrat's eyes began to sting. Of course it was Shimada.
"Oh?" He responded, careful not to let his voice crack.
"And he's caring, very gentlemanly, and his smile is the most beautiful thing in the world..." God damn him. Damn him to hell and back, that asshole, that monster, that--
"I-I need to go." He stood up, shaking, and stepped out of the booth.
"Jamie?" She stood up as well and reached out to him, voice tinged with hurt.
"I need to go." He brushed past her, limping away as fast as he could before she could notice the streaks of tears beginning to paint his face.
-----
Junkrat slammed the door of his flat behind him, and immediately crumpled onto his bed. His body wracked with silent sobs as he clawed at his face, desperately wiping away tears welling up in his eyes. He wasn't some weak crybaby. He wasn't, wasn't some pansy who couldn't handle anything unrequited. So why did it hurt so much? He sat up, looking down across the room to meet his eyes in the mirror. He scanned over his patchy hair, his scraggly teeth, his soot-stained face, his scrawny frame. No wonder she chose Hanzo. Who would want a fuck up this bad?
He let out a silent wail, digging his nails into his face and dragging them, desperately hoping to fix whatever it was that wasn't good enough for the world, wasn't good enough for her. He pulled his hands from his face and stared at them. Too rough, too calloused, too lanky to be good enough to hold hers. Hell, one of them wasn't even human. Rat let out a soft cry. He fucked things up as usual, actually getting his hopes up that maybe, just maybe, someone would think he was actually worth something, that he was actually worth loving--he should have known better than to kid himself.
A knock rang out at the door. Sharply once, then followed by two more persistent knocks. Scrubbing at his eyes, Junkrat hobbled over to the noise. Probably Hog wondering why the room was locked. He flung open the door with a sigh.
"Not right now, Hog, I'm not doing so--"
Symmetra stood in front of him.
Junkrat was very impressed by how fast he could slam a door shut.
"Jamison! Open the door!" She shouted from the opposite side.
"I can't be assed to do anything, Sheila!" He retorted. At this she paused, clearing her throat before continuing.
"Listen, I am sorry if I made you uncomfortable earlier."
"Like hell you did," he scoffed.
"I overstepped my boundaries in assuming you felt the same way about me as I did." Wait, what.
"Wha--"
"I shouldn't have forced my affections on you, and I apologize fully for that. I was childish to assume you would return them as eagerly as I had hoped. If you so wish, I can leave you alone from now on, but I would just like to say goodbye to you one last time before I must." What.
Junkrat heard footsteps begin to step away from the door, and flung it open in panic. Symmetra turned abruptly to look at him, eyes brimming with tears. He stood there slack-jawed for a moment, before realizing it was probably wise to say something eloquent.
"Oi, and who the fuck do you exactly think you is?" She stared at him, confused.
"I don't under--"
"Who the fuck do you think you is, dropping a bomb like this on me outta nowhere? There's only one person that's allowed to use bombs here, and that's me, got it? I spend months pining my ass off, thinking you would never give me the time of day, and you're here telling me you felt the same exact shit and neither of us ever bothered to tell each other? Do you know how much of a knot my knickers were in, thinking you'd gone moony-eyed for Shimada? I can't believe this bullshit. I fucking love you, asshole!"
He froze.
She turned to face him, brows furrowed in the same way when he'd first laid eyes on her. "You...love me?"
Rat stuttered, looking around, before finally hanging his head. "Yeah," he breathed out. "I do."
She stepped towards him, walking close until their faces were mere inches apart.
"Could I ask you something?"
"Fire away."
"What if I felt the same way about you?"
Junkrat felt his heart explode into a million shards, impaling themselves into his soul. He closed his eyes on impulse and leaned forward, closing the gap between his chapped lips and her soft ones. It felt more spectacular than a nuclear detonation, and he loved every second of it.
And judging by her face when he cracked open one eye, she did too.