Chapter Text
[one]
Mind never liked Heart from the get go. All those silly feelings, and the impulsivity of the man was extreme. He found himself put off by the grin he wore, the whims he obeyed without a second thought, and worst of all – his uncanny ability to read Mind like second nature.
Once, he found Heart eating a tub of vanilla ice cream with the freezer door still open, and he had scolded him for wasting electricity, but Heart just shrugged it off with a roll of his eyes and asked if he had wanted the ice cream.
Mind did want the ice cream.
He didn’t dignify the question with a response.
Another time, they were shouting at each other about a silly question he no longer remembered, though the smug expression on Heart when he realised that he was winning stuck with him. To see that beastly, toothy grin, and the predatory glint in his eye, it sent bile up his chest.
Mind hated him, then. He still did.
He told himself he hated the guy until his very being finally agreed with his brain.
And Heart wasn’t a difficult person to hate anyway. No, he was not. They were opposites; they were sure to cause each others’ destruction, and he was so different from Mind, it was easy to hate him. After all, they shared zero similarities, and their opinions were vastly conflicting, so why would it be hard to despise one another?
It was not difficult at all. No, it was not.
It was not.
[two]
“(Just shut that fucking mouth of yours. Literally no one cares about your opinion,)” Heart snarled, bearing his teeth at Mind. It was quite an amusing sight – seeing his face twisted into a form of anger one could only call animalistic. The word creature suited him well.
“[If no one cares, including you,]” he retorted, “[Then why are you so furious?]” Mind crossed his arms, staring at the way Heart’s scowl deepened, fists clenched. The sheer anger in his face, and that look of irritation – the look he’d seen before, when Heart knew he was losing their game.
Heart huffed as Mind rolled his eyes. “(I care because you insulted me. You called me a-)”
“[-Creature,]” he finished smugly. “[Because you’re one. You hear me? Nothing human at all.]”
That was the last straw. Heart lashed out at him, and Mind stepped back, wearing a shit-eating grin on his face at another successful attempt at riling Heart up.
He seemed to notice this then, and stormed away, though not before raising a middle finger in Mind’s face. His laughter rang around the house, even after Heart slammed his bedroom door.
The way he had fumed; it was something Mind could never get enough of.
(three)
He could sense Mind’s fury without needing to see it – the way he exhaled slowly, on the brink of slapping Heart in the face. The way the tension in the hallway seemed to choke the life out of him, though he wouldn’t mind letting it, seeing that he was actually getting a reaction out of that stupid asshole for once.
“[Juno.}” The name made him jump instinctively, but he kept his head high, smiling.
“[Where did you hide my crown,]” MInd said through gritted teeth, moments away from punching away that grin he was wearing off his face, he could tell.
“(Hm?)” Heart questioned with feigned innocence. He was just outside his bedroom door. He could just lock it, and Mind could never get him. But where was the fun in that, in hiding?
“[I said,]” he repeated, [where did you put my crown?]”
“(What makes you think I took it? Maybe Darrell did, for all we know.)”
Mind gripped his wrist so tightly he knew it was going to bruise.
“{Because you’re wearing that air of smugness,]” he spat, and Heart grinned. “[And because you haven’t shouted at me for assuming you stole it.]”
“Maybe you’re right, maybe I took it. But what makes you think I’ll tell you where I hid it?)” he said.
“[Because,]” Mind started again, pulling Heart suddenly with his grip on his wrist, catching him off guard. [I am going to pull that answer out of your throat.]”
The floor greeted Heart roughly, and he slammed face first into the concrete. Pain bloomed in his nose. And was that warm blood leaking out of his face?
Heart sighed, as if it was merely a minor inconvenience, and muttered quietly, “(Garden.)”
And Mind – oh poor Mind – believed his lying ass. As if he gave up so easily. As if he would let Mind beat him up without a fight.
He won in the end, Heart told himself, when a slightly exasperated Soul was cleaning the blood off his face, and an angrier Mind could be heard shouting his name from the garden.
Yes, he won.
[four]
Heart was ridiculously unreasonable.
Even when matters did not involve Mind, he was still intransigent. He did not bother to reason properly, nor did he bother to listen to Mind’s side of the issue. He just shut down everything he said or asked, always with that cheeky grin of his.
He knew he was being annoying. He just didn’t care.
“[I swear, Heart, you are going to be the death of me.]” Mind ran a hand through his hair. “[Why aren’t you willing to listen?]”
Heart just shrugged, boredom evident in his expression. “(I just don’t understand why you feel the need to control Soul’s drinking habits.)”
“[Because,]” he hissed, “[He will kill us all if this continues.]”
“(Does it really matter? And why am I in your little plan?)” he inquired. “(Just do it yourself, if you really want to.)”
MInd was a witty remark away from slamming the table.
“{He won’t listen to me. That’s his flaw: he has the worst part of your attitude.]”
Heart smiled. “(Oh, I have good parts to my personality? Thank you.)”
“{That’s not-]” He sighed. “{Are you going to help me then?]”
Heart made a show of contemplating it, nearly getting his hopes up, until- “(...Nah.)”
Mind stormed away from him, fuming.
(five)
Heart could never understand Mind.
It was a thought he had long ago. It was true; they were absolute opposites, they could never become friends, or anything related to that matter. One was made of pathos, the other logos. Just as how Heart could not understand Mind, the latter would also never understand him.
And try as he may to see things through the other’s perspective, it usually ended up in brawls, shouting matches, and both of them shrinking away to nurse the physical and mental wounds, till their next session.
So he stopped. He stopped trying. It didn’t seem to matter – why would it? He was never meant to understand the logical side of things, nor enjoy consistency. Why bother?
When he stopped trying to understand, to fix a bridge that was never there, their fights escalated. Because while Heart stopped caring, Mind kept trying. He continued lashing out, angry at his choice to forget. Maybe that was how they were similar. Anger.
Though it was something to think about. Mind should’ve forgotten too. Why’d he bother? There was no point to try when nature stopped them from doing so.
Once, Heart had asked him, during one of their arguments. He’d asked, “(Why bother fighting me? What’s the point?)”
And somehow, he got Mind to shut up for once. Silence filled the room, unnatural in his ears.
Then the autonomon grasped for an explanation. “[We need to. We need to understand each other's opinions. It is the only way we can become Whole, isn’t it?]”
In a moment of clarity, Heart spoke, “(Is there another way?)”
Mind paused then, and he could hear the gears whirring in his head.
Finally, he responded, “[Perhaps. Though why would you try to find another path that is not visible to the naked eye?]”
He did not answer that question. But he knew the answer in his heart.
because, this path was too painful to walk on.
But he forgot the conversation. Heart forgot, and they went back to the status quo, the exchange buried in the sea of his memories.
(six)
It was all Soul’s fault. It didn't matter how he’d try to fight his way out of this one.
This was all, one hundred percent, his fault.
And their stupidity for agreeing with him.
At dinner, he had suggested a night of drinking – trust the alcoholic to suggest drinking as bonding – and surprisingly, Mind had accepted it. The bane of impulsivity, allowing a night of hindered logical thinking?
Well, it didn’t matter now. Now everyone was drunk out of their minds, Soul probably on the ground from a drink too many, and Heart was a shot away from vomiting all over the floor. He sunk into the couch, hiccuping and giggling.
“[What’s so funny?]” Mind questioned, but the accusatory tone was quelled by the slurriness of his voice.
“(Nothing,)” he replied, still laughing. “(Or this situation.)”
“[I’m surprised you have enough coherency to speak.]”
“(the sentiment goes both ways.)”
Mind was silent for a while. Heart was beginning to nod off when he spoke quietly, breaking the silence with a whisper:
“[Do you think you’ll remember this tomorrow?]”
Heart yawned, shaking his head. “(No, why?)”
“[I just… I don’t know how I’ll feel in the morning, when everything goes back to normal.]” He could hear the quiet dread in Mind’s voice.
“(What normal? Nothing about this is ever normal.)”
He was about to say something else, but Heart shushed him, drunkenly putting a finger to his own lips. “(Just rest,)” he said softly.
“[I-]”
“(Shhh,)” he slurred, putting his shot glass on the coffee table with a dull thunk. “(Go to sleep.)”
Mind was about to protest, but sank back onto the couch stiffly.
Heart waited until his breaths eventually evened out, and silence coated the living room once more. It was then he spoke to himself.
“(It won’t matter in the morning anyway.)”