Chapter Text
"You gotta be kidding me? That's her now?"
Gojo looks at a lady's photo in utter disbelief.
"I'm most definitely not joking," Suguru Geto, his best friend, chuckles, taking his phone back.
For Gojo, last night at the bar starts to make a lot more sense as he puts the pieces together.
"Tough day?" Takuma, the bartender, asks, waiting for an order.
"Tell me bout it!" Gojo presses, perusing the rows and rows of different bottles of alcohol behind the bar.
Takuma wipes the counter as he glances at Gojo. "Work?"
"You read my mind, Takuma...You read my mind." Gojo sighs.
Gojo notices this woman walking up to the bar. She's too fine to ignore; she has a slender figure and good posture. One would think she's a model, but she looks too smart for that. A unique mark on her face, and she was wearing red lipstick matching her silk dress. She's unbothered by the all-male presence at the bar.
Takuma straightens up, a little more pep than usual. "What can I get you?"
"Two!... One beer with a slice of lemon and a mojito with an umbrella thingy," she tries saying plainly, but fails miserably.
"A beer with lemon and a mojito with umbrella thingy coming up!" Takuma flashes a grin and a quick wink.
The woman starts flicking her phone, uninterested in talking.
Gojo cuts in as Takuma prepares the lady's order. "Hey, Takuma, whiskey with cola here, hold the umbrella, will you?" He grins, a mischievous glint in his eyes. What can I say? He thought, glancing at the woman beside him. The lady beside me is attractive.
The woman deadpans and looks at him. Her eyes widen, and a gasp escapes her lips. He met her stare. "Gojo! Satoru Gojo!" She recognises him.
Well, this is a turn for the books! Things are turning up. He muses while waiting for his drink.
Her eyes narrow, "You total dick!"
"Or maybe not!" His ego instantly deflates.
Gojo frowns. "I'm sorry, do I know you?" The lady knew his name, which made him speechless. He could have sworn he'd never seen her before in his life.
"You...You made my life hell in high school!" The lady replies, a clear anger in her tone.
Gojo's brain works double time to place her in his jock days. Unfortunately, making her life a living hell at high school doesn't narrow the suspects much.
"Huh! Unbelievable! You... you...don't even know who I am!" She slurs, indignant.
"I don't recall, sorry. You need to give me a clue."
"Weak?" She snaps with raised eyebrows and fixes a stare.
"I... I..." He's lost, no idea. He tries to disarm the situation. "Listen, I admit to being an ass at school, let me cover your drink as an apology," He pleads his case.
"I'm not that cheap, you, Gojo!" She tries to form an insult, but the drink is getting the upper hand.
Takuma places the woman's drink on the bar, looking confused, but enjoys the back and forth of the two.
"Thank you," she tells Takuma and throws an "asshole" at Gojo before she grabs her drinks and briskly exits.
Gojo sarcastically waves his hand, "Nice meeting you, by the way!"
"What was that all about?" Takuma wonders, pushing Gojo's drink forward.
"Your guess is as good as mine," Gojo murmurs, swirling his 'Lemmy'.
"You have a way with the ladies, man... A way of driving them off!" Takuma barks a laugh.
Gojo flicks the paper coaster. "Well, at least one of us finds it funny,” He then puts the glass in his mouth and takes a swig of his drink, looking at the lady's direction.
The next morning, Gojo catches up with Geto, at their usual Saturday basketball game at the local park.
"Heyo, let's go! The court’s free!" Geto calls from a distance, and Gojo jogs up with the ball.
"Alright, let's go! Time to school you, Suguru!" Gojo calls back. Geto smirks, knowing he doesn't stand a chance.
"Talking of school, you wouldn't believe what happened to me last night," Gojo started, throwing him the ball to check. "I'm at a bar in town, and this chick starts hurling abuse at me."
"What does that have to do with school?" Geto asks, hovering over Gojo.
"I'm getting to that," Gojo fakes a move right, then hustles past Geto to the left. Swish!
"Anyway, this girl was hot. A bit tipsy, well, more like drunk. Get this, she calls me a dick out of nowhere."
"She sounds perceptive," Geto dribbles the ball, passing it to Gojo.
"Ha! I'm at a loss as to who she is and ask for a little help. She turns her head and says 'Weak', calls me an asshole, and walks off!"
"Weak!" This throws Suguru into hysterics. "You don't remember Utahime?!" Suguru asks while losing another point.
"Utahime?" Gojo repeats, looking for inspiration, then, upon saying her name, he suddenly realizes who she is. "There is no way that's her! Also, this lady has a birthmark across her nose."
"If she's the same Utahime Iori from high school, then it is her." Geto dribbles the ball closer to the ring while Gojo hovers over him.
"Whoa! She is a late bloomer. I mean, she's like a solid 8, maybe a 9!"
Geto throws the ball to the ring and misses. "Bullshit! No way!"
"Are you talking about the shot you missed or the woman in question?" Gojo asks.
"Wait, I have an idea. I'm connected to her brother on Insta. Let's look her up," Geto says with the ball now under his arm, taking out his phone.
"Whoa! No, she's a 9 for sure! This is her," passing the phone to Gojo.
"You gotta be kidding me! That's her now?!" Gojo asks his best friend, staring at Utahime's photo in complete disbelief. He adjusts his round, dark-tinted glasses to make sure the blinding bright sunlight is not fooling him.
“I'm not joking,” Geto chuckles, taking his phone away from Gojo.
"The tipsy girl from last night is the 'Weak' Utahime Iori?" Gojo shakes his head, still bewildered.
"She looks even better on her Instagram," Geto said with a grin. "You're right about the face mark," he follows.
"She looked good last night, but not the same as on her Insta. You can't believe everything you see there," Gojo told him.
Gojo takes the ball and walks with a slow dribble, recalling Utahime at school. "Hmm... yes, now it makes sense. Oh man! I wish I weren't such an asshole to her at school. I actually did like her a bit; she was funny, kinda cute, and chubby. Damn it! Now I remember, I even called her 'Chubs' back then."
"Come on, we both know you liked cheerleaders and the hottest. Tall girl with a big asses! A king jock wouldn't have given her a second look." Geto keeps Gojo honest.
Geto's no star player, but he's a sniper from deep, sinking a 3-pointer. "I just remembered, I'm invited to her brother's birthday next week."
"Maybe you should bring me as your plus one, Suguru. Oh, wait, you're probably taking Shoko."
"Nah, she's on call next weekend. She wouldn't be able to do it," Geto mentions.
"You should go," Geto extends the invite.
"Come to think of it, I'm not sure anymore. She hates me, Suguru."
"Well, if you're not going, I probably won't go myself," Geto throws the ball and misses.