Work Text:
‘Hyung, do you know what Ao3 is?’
That's the last thing Soobin hears before the Great Shift. Before the world as he knows it comes to an end. His last taste of normalcy slipping between his fingers. Not that he knows that yet.
‘I don’t think there’s an idol out there who doesn’t.’ Soobin grunted, tapping away at his console and shifting his legs so Beomgyu could plop down on the sofa next to him.
‘Right, well I’ve just seen something horrible.’ The younger man pouted, curling up into a little ball and sulking. Soobin paused his game.
‘Beomgyu, please tell me you haven’t read anything.’
‘No - not that.’ Beomgyu pouted harder, his lips forming a plump little arrow towards his chin. ‘I saw the rankings.’
‘Rankings?’
‘Like who’s paired with who most.’ Came the mumbling response, and Soobin can’t for the life of him work out why this seems to be a touchy subject. ‘Out of all of us, one of the top ones of all time actually- it’s you and Yeonjun hyung.’
Soobin threw his head back and laughed, ‘Really? I’m winning?’
‘It’s not funny!’ Beomgyu whined, pout now morphing into a fully fledged scowl. That shut Soobin up.
‘Wha- why not? You don’t have to protect my dignity, Gyu-yah, I don’t mind. I knew this sort of thing would happen when I debuted.’
‘I know it’s not a big deal… but-‘ Beomgyu mumbled shyly, ears going a cute shade of pink as he spoke. ‘Why isn’t it us?’
‘Us?’ Soobin tilted his head in confusion. ‘Wait- you’re upset because more people write about me fucking Yeonjun than you?’
‘Actually when it’s you and Yeonjun he’s the one doing the fucking.’ Beomgyu replied snarkily.
Soobin squawked in indignation, ‘You have read them, you pervert!’
‘No I haven’t! That’s just like, common knowledge!’ Beomgyu’s face shone a brighter red. ‘I can barely open my burner Twitter without seeing something about him being inside you. It’s actually in your best interests to want our pairing to go up because then you can be a top.’
‘Oh my God, Gyu, please shut up.’ Soobin pressed his palms to his face to try and hide from whatever this conversation was going to be. ‘Why do you care about this? It’s none of our business what people write about.’
‘But like…’ Beomgyu played with the edge of his sweatshirt, a nervous little tic Soobin has always found endlessly adorable. ‘Why do people think you’d be better with him than me? We’re the danjjaks. Soobin and Beomgyu. We go on holiday together and call each other soulmates and we live in our own goddamn dorm!’
‘Okay, well, firstly, they don’t know that. And I really don’t think it has much to do with compatibility; it’s more like. Who they get hornier thinking about.’
‘So you think you’d look better having sex with Yeonjun than with me?! I’m not as pretty?!’ Beomgyu shrieked, eyes wide in warning. So, that was the wrong thing to have said. Soobin turned fully to face him, preparing for damage control.
‘No, no, Gyu-yah, of course not- I’m sure we’d look great-‘ dear God what was he saying, what was his life, ‘It’s just… I don’t know. It’s not like we have any control over what they write, is it?’
‘But we do. A little.’ Beomgyu’s face went from indignation to his wide pleading eyes - a sight far scarier to Soobin because of his complete inability to refuse them. ‘You and Yeonjun must flirt more, you give them more fuel to work with.’
‘I do not flirt with Yeonjun hyung.’ Soobin said flatly.
‘Well, you don’t flirt with me either, clearly.’ Beomgyu frowned, curling against Soobin’s side, face pressed against his shoulder like it always was.
Soobin sighed, his arm going to the younger’s waist out of habit, trying to soothe him with little strokes to his back. ‘Okay.’ He said, resigned now to his fate. ‘Tell me why this matters so much to you and I’ll help you out.’
‘This isn’t just about me, hyung, this is about your reputation too. You’re totally mischaracterised in the Yeonbin stories - it’s much better for you to help Soogyu.’
Soobin decided not to ask any of the questions that that sentence had raised.
‘Right. Well. That's not your reason, is it?’
Beomgyu buried his face deeper into Soobin’s sweater, mumbling shyly and hiding his face.
‘I just… I’m competitive. And… Ugh.’ Beomgyu went silent for a moment; the older man knew to keep quiet and let him organise his thoughts. ‘And they keep saying we’re one sided. That I like you way more than you like me, because you’re busy flirting with your hyung.’
‘Awh, puppy.’ Soobin crooned, pinching the younger’s cheek like he was a baby. ‘You know that isn’t true. Hyung loves you very much.’
Soobin had been trying to say that more lately. Exposure therapy. Make it seem more like something he could say platonically so he didn’t have a heart attack every time Beomgyu said it platonically. Because that’s what they were - platonic. Friends. Granted, it was a codependent, possibly unhealthy, definitely homoerotic friendship, but a friendship nonetheless. They had never done anything that decidedly crossed that boundary, but boy did Soobin enjoy toeing the line. And so did Beomgyu by the look of the face he was now making. Big doe eyes, pouty lips, face squished against his chest as he gazed up at him.
‘Hyung loves me?’ He said, cute tone so exaggerated it would have been cringey from anyone other than Beomgyu.
‘Of course hyung does.’ Soobin managed to breathe out, remarkably steadily compared to the thundering of his heart, eyes fixed straight ahead to avoid the seductress beneath.
‘Well… if hyung really loves me…’ Beomgyu said teasingly, poking his way up Soobin’s arm, ‘He would help me win.’
He sighed again, lamely asking ‘What would we even do?’ Knowing he was just buying himself time before he inevitably acquiesced.
‘Just like… wink at me sometimes. Hold my waist. Leave little clues for moa.’
Now, Soobin knew he shouldn’t say yes. He knew it was probably the worst idea anyone in mankind had ever had. But Soobin was two things before anything else. He was an idiot and he was a pervert. And if there was a bad choice to be made, one that might get him more of Beomgyu’s attention, trust and believe Soobin was going to make it.
‘…Fine.’ He said, barely getting the word out before Beomgyu squealed and hugged him tight. ‘If it’s really that important to you.’ He tried to sound unaffected but couldn’t stop the fond grin that spread across his face.
‘It is, it is!’ Beomgyu giggled, pulling at Soobin’s cheeks the way he always did when he got cuteness aggression. ‘Ah Soobinie hyungie, you’ve always been my favourite!’
The aforementioned Soobinie hyungie snorted and rolled his eyes, but Beomgyu caught the flush of colour on his cheeks.
*****
When Soobin woke up the next morning, he dozed for a few minutes, free for this small portion of time before he remembered the promise he’d made last night. The sound of Beomgyu’s alarm buzzing gently through the thin wall between them brought it all rushing back. God, what had he done? He’d signed his own death warrant. If Beomgyu was going to flirt with him, in public, let Soobin flaunt him like he actually had him as he desperately wanted - Soobin was going to get a boner so huge he simply wouldn’t have the blood flow in his brain to keep him alive. God help him.
‘Soobiiiin~’ The devil always arrived if thought about for too long. A devil with such a pretty morning voice and gentle rapping at his door. ‘Are you awake, hyung? The car gets here at eight!’
‘I’m up, I’m up!’ Soobin groaned, rolling out of bed and pulling on a shirt and sweatpants before opening the door. He couldn’t help but smile at the sight before him - Beomgyu before his morning shower, soft and sleepy and ruffled round the edges. His nose puffy like a garlic.
‘Yah, you’re too cute.’ Soobin mumbled, ruffling the younger man’s hair as he strode past him into the kitchen.
‘Tell moa that!’ Beomgyu bounced after him, suddenly spiking with energy.
‘No- in what world would I randomly dm how cute you are?’
‘In the one where we win Ao3!’ Beomgyu skittered over and hopped onto the counter, swinging his legs as Soobin peeled an egg, handing it to the younger one to nibble on while he made them two hot lemon waters. Princess treatment sure, but habit by now.
‘If you don’t do it I will.’ Beomgyu sulked, unmoved by the special treatment he was so used to.
‘Go ahead, puppy.’ Soobin indulged, ‘Tell them how pretty you look today.’
Focus back on making the breakfast (microwaving a few leftovers and arranging them into bowls), Soobin barely noticed Beomgyu tip-tapping on his phone with a little giggle.
*****
💬✅ @translatingTXT
[260310] weverse dm 🧸💬
🧸 gooooooood morning!!!
🧸 gyu bear is here >_< (cute tone)
🧸 I don’t feel very pretty this morning…
🧸 my face!
🧸 is puffy!
🧸 but soobinie hyungie says I’m cute in the mornings~ (cutest tone)
🧸 my nose goes all swollen hehe ㅠㅠ
soobieboobiewoobie @gyuusoob
right. In the sense that…
norma is seeing txt!! @normoal
@gyuusoob no but really are we talking around the breakfast table with everyone else or whispered lovingly under the sheets…
soobieboobiewoobie @gyuusoob
@normoal DONT I CANT AHHHH THESE HUSBANDS SO DOMESTIC IM GONNA CRY
no.1 song of the stars enjoyer @bamjunniez
not to be a tinhatter here but ‘in the mornings’ totally does suggest they wake up together regularly #nooticing
ellie ⚡️ @moamentsofalways
guys can we actually not. they all live together they all see each other in the mornings stop pushing your agenda on healthy male friendships
no.1 song of the stars enjoyer @bamjunniez
lol
*****
In just a few hours they’d be the same age again, Soobin lamented. He liked those four short months, where he could insist on being called hyung, baby the younger even more than he usually did. A sage nod and a stoic ‘listen to your elders’ did wonders for his psyche. And possibly his dick. Still, it was unavoidable. Everyone ages, even someone as baby and puppy as Beomgyu.
‘Put your phone away.’ That very same little baby whined petulantly, snuggling closer to Soobin where they were laid sprawling on his bed. ‘These are my last few hours of being 23. Have a sense of magnitude here.’
‘I’m picking out photos, Gyu-yah.’ Soobin sighed, running a placating hand through Beomgyu’s hair. ‘I want to be the first to wish you happy birthday, so I have to do it now.’
‘What are you picking?’ Beomgyu wiggled, trying to get a glimpse of the other man’s phone and harumphing when it was turned briskly away.
‘Nu-uh, baby. You’ll have to wait and see.’
Beomgyu sulked, nuzzling further into Soobin’s neck, so close he could feel the heat of his breath as he said ‘Enjoy calling me baby while you can. I’m nearly an old man. Ruined. Ancient.’
‘Hush now. I’m 24 already.’
‘Exactly!’ Beomgyu whinged, earning a playful smack on the arm. ‘So old, hyung. Such a perv letting moa think you’re sleeping with me. Cradle snatcher.’
‘Hey!’ Soobin said in mock offense, ‘You want me to stop making them think that? I can go ahead and change my birthday message if that’s what you want…’
‘No, no!’ Beomgyu grabbed his hands and wrestled his phone out of them, giggling as they play fought. When they calmed down he whispered,
‘Is it a good message?’
‘I mean it.’ Soobin whispered back. That seemed to calm the boy down enough to go back to snuggling, and by the time it was midnight and the tweet had auto sent on its timer, they were both out cold. When they wake up Beomgyu will be 24, and it will feel like he belongs in Soobin’s arms, but both of these things have been true since January.
*****
💬✅@translatingTXT
Replying to @TXT_members
trans: My little puppy is all grown up… Don’t worry, hyung will still spoil you even when you don’t really deserve it. Happy birthday Gyu-yah ~~ 💌
#SOOBIN
[img.24] image description: Beomgyu curled up and asleep against Soobin, who is grinning fondly at him, seemingly unaware their picture is being taken.
[img.011] image description: Beomgyu laying flat on a massage bed in a bath robe, face mask on and eating one of the cucumber slices from his eyes.
[img.92] image description: A slightly blurry candid of Beomgyu, who is mid-laugh and attempting to snatch the phone from whoever is taking the photo.
[img.334] image description: Beomgyu puffing his cheeks out cutely and having them squished by whoever is taking the photo.
fifi is soogyupilled @andtheflowertots
Replying to @TXT_members and @translatingTXT
I’m suckling so hard on this soogyu blunt that i WILL have to be hospitalised there is no hope for me.
*****
A few nights later they were all at the main dorm, Kai and Taehyun were screaming over Mario kart, and Yeonjun was laughing at the way they wrestled every time the score changed. Beomgyu was pottering around in the kitchen making ramen, singing softly to himself and Soobin was mindlessly scrolling through Twitter, so everything was as it should have been. Normal. So normal Soobin could almost forget about their little agreement - until something popped up on his timeline.
💫 Rin 💫 @iwasbornyesterday
Reasons I believe Soobin and Beomgyu are jinjja dating, a thread 🧵
Soobin turned his brightness down and cast a wary look over his shoulder before clicking the thread. It mentioned some of their TikToks - the unready for that and LoL rank ones. Then their Vietnam trip, the lovestagrams, their car sharing. Theories that they lived separately from the group with screenshots of little slips of the tongue in lives and vlogs. Finally, there was just a collection of photos of them looking at each other, Soobin’s fond half crescent eyes as he smiled down at him, Beomgyu’s little arrow of a pout as he grinned back. Soobin suddenly felt a little ill. Was it that obvious? Was that really how he looked at Beomgyu? Like a lovesick fool with a high school crush? Oh, he was so royally fucked. But - upon closer inspection - it did seem Beomgyu was looking back at him with a similar expression. He felt his stomach flutter as he read through the comments and quote tweets. People did think they were together, that they were soulmates, that they were hopelessly in love. It made him feel all warm inside in a way he knew not to look too closely at. And sure, it wasn’t healthy to live in a delusion that your best friend could love you back, to let yourself fall deeper by willingly ignoring the truth. But for a moment, he let himself see them through the eyes of the fans, and he thought maybe that could be enough. Not dating, but in some strange reality that lived between real life and fiction, in some people’s heads they were. Maybe Beomgyu’s scheme had more upsides than he thought.
With that, he opened Weverse and scrolled for a little while until he spotted something he could reply to. Something to fuel the speculation. The post read:
Beomgyu oppa!!! What's the comfiest way to sleep?
Soobin smirked and wrote out: ‘He seems to think C ㅋㅋ’
He’d barely pressed send before he heard the telltale little ping of Yeonjun getting the notification.
‘...Soobin, could I have a word?’
Soobin froze nervously but nodded, following his hyung into his room. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, he felt oddly like he was about to be told off by his mother.
Yeonjun sighed and pressed the door shut before leaning against the opposite wall, sizing his friend up with narrowed eyes. He stayed silent for a moment until suddenly he said,
‘Are you and Beomgyu dating?’
Soobin balked, ‘Huh? No- of course not! Why would you-‘
‘Because you seem dead set on making everyone think that.’ Yeonjun frowned, ‘I mean you’ve always been affectionate, but this publicly is a bit new, no?’
Soobin hung his head, and it all came crashing down on him. What this must look like to everyone who knew them. That he seemed like a desperate, desperate idiot fawning over a man he could never pull, making a fool of himself by pretending he could. Soon he was blushing so hard he felt the telltale pinpricks of embarrassed tears in his eyes.
‘Ah, hyung.’ He mumbled. ‘It’s not like that.’
Then Yeonjun was beside him on the bed, gently wrapping an arm around his shoulders, ‘What’s going on Binnie?’ he said softly.
After a few deep breaths that kept his tears at bay, Soobin replied ‘Beomgyu he- hes got it in his head that he wants to ‘win Ao3’. Get the most fics or something. It’s stupid. But it just means he wants me to be a bit more affectionate and stuff, it’s no big deal.’
‘…Win Ao3?’ Yeonjun looked to the ceiling in exasperation, ‘You are so fucking stupid.’
‘Hey! I’m baring my heart to you right now, hyung!’
‘Why would you agree to that, Bin? You’ll torture yourself!’
‘Yeah… but…’
‘But?’
‘It means he flirts with me too!’ Soobin hissed emphatically, part of him terrified the walls were so thin everyone could hear him. ‘It means I’m allowed to like, hold his hand and stuff!’
‘You already hold his hand plenty.’
‘Okay, but now he wants me to!’
‘Ah, Soobin.’ Yeonjun sighed, not sure whether to be completely fed up with his friend’s stupidity or to pity him for it. ‘He’s always wanted you to hold his hand.’
He hoped that would imply the much bigger thing he didn’t have the words to say, but suspected it was going straight over the younger’s head.
They sat like that for a while, Soobin deep in thought and Yeonjun stroking his hair gently to soothe him. He almost missed when the leader spoke again, it was so quiet and unlike his usual boisterous self.
‘Just… let me have this, hyung.’
He sounded so broken, so defeated, that Yeonjun reluctantly nodded. ‘Okay, Binnie. Okay.’
*****
Taehyun’s favourite kitty @dagonyangy
Guys, is it just me or did Yeonjun look kinda sad when Soogyu were being all clingy at the fansign today?? Jealous love triangle vibes mwahahahaha (someone write the fic)
panic!! @bamstaaaaaaa
@dagonyangy no but fr I’d be a broken man too if I had to watch the loml rub all up on another guy…
Soogyu updates @danjjakdiaries
Soobin and Beomgyu get cozy at a fansign event, stunning fans with their boyfriend visuals and dreamy vibes
[260404.mp4] video description: Soobin and Beomgyu are huddled together behind the fan sign table, giggling softly. Soobin is helping Beomgyu get into his outfit, a little fluffy bear hat and knitted matching cardigan. He says something softly, subtitled as ‘pretty baby’, as he pulls the hat down over Beomgyu’s eyes. Beomgyu giggles and nuzzles his face against Soobin’s chest, trying to tickle his face with the hat. Soobin places his arms briefly on Beomgyu’s waist and rubs his cheek against the hat. He then says into the microphone ‘it’s so soft!’ And repeats the action. He boops Beomgyu’s nose and takes his seat. Throughout this, Yeonjun can be seen mournfully watching on, a faint line of worry between his brows. When Soobin catches his eye, he looks sheepish and avoids his gaze.
*****
‘I can’t believe we got this many fics from a few sappy weverse posts. Imagine the power we would hold if we made a sex tape.’
Soobin nearly chokes on his peach ice tea. ‘Huh?!’
Beomgyu’s replying chuckle has a far more evil undertone than Soobin is comfortable with.
‘Relax, hyungie. I’m kidding.’ The younger man found his eyes and winked cheekily, ‘We won’t film it, huh?’
Soobin burned a bright red and suddenly found his phone very interesting.
‘Shut up.’ He choked out, eliciting another evil giggle from his friend.
‘No but seriously, we do need to step it up a bit. We have more fics but still nowhere near enough.’
‘Step it up?’ Soobin tried to control the wobble of - fear? Excitement? In his voice.
‘Mm.’ Beomgyu waddled over and draped himself over Soobin’s lap. It wasn’t an unusual thing but Soobin felt his body tense and held his breath all the same. ‘What do you think, Binnie? Any ideas?’ He didn’t give enough time for an answer before continuing, ‘Because I’ve been thinking…’
Beomgyu threaded his hands into the other’s hair, playing with the short strands at the back of his neck. Soobin was fucked.
‘What if I show up to the Tokyo Dome show with a funny little bruise on my neck?’
‘Huh?’ Soobin’s brain lagged a little, probably to protect him, prevent him from getting a stiffie while his best friend snuggled into his lap.
Beomgyu looked up at him through his eyelashes, pout on full display, eyes wide in a way that always got him whatever he wanted. He murmured, far more sultry than he had any right to be, ‘Why don’t you give me a hickey, Soobinie…’ he leaned in and whispered, lips so close they were brushing Soobin’s ear, ‘Please, hyung…’
‘Gyu…’ Soobin breathed out, hands subconsciously finding the smaller man’s waist and steadying him on his lap. His eyes fluttered closed as Beomgyu pressed himself forwards, and used the hands he still had at the back of his neck to gently bring Soobin’s lips towards his neck. ‘Gyu…’ He murmured again. It was all he could think - all his senses, everything in his head, it was just Beomgyu, Beomgyu, always Beomgyu. He smelled like Miss Dior and the leather scented body wash they shared, he was wearing Soobin’s sweatshirt, and he was so warm and heavy in his lap and real.
He could never have stopped himself, he’d imagined it too often. What it would feel like to worry that thin skin between his teeth, how the warmth of his collarbones would bleed into the flesh of his lips. Soobin sighed happily as his mouth met that honey skin for the first time, pressing a fluttering kiss there before he began to suck. He got a little lost in it then, nipping and soothing with his tongue, scraping his teeth across spit-slick skin, kissing and kissing and kissing until- ‘Ah~’
A tiny little sound from the boy on his lap. From his best friend. From the man he was sucking the neck of. Reality jolted back into place with such force Soobin suddenly felt motion sick. He pulled back a little and saw the angry red blotch on Beomgyu’s skin. He’d done that. He’d got so lost in the moment that he’d burst those blood vessels. Fuck, it was gonna turn purple. And Beomgyu had asked him to - but not because he wanted it. Because he wanted to win a stupid fucking game. It wasn’t real - none of this was real - Soobin abruptly realised. He froze for a second and then, without thinking, unceremoniously shoved the younger boy up from his lap.
‘Soobin?’
‘Fuck-’ Soobin panted, staring wide eyed up at the boy. ‘Fuck.’ he muttered again with passion before sprinting back to his room, slamming the door shut behind him.
Beomgyu stood there in a daze for what felt like hours. It could have been seconds, minutes, years. Then, blinking his way into the bathroom, he stared long and hard into the mirror at the purple bruise on his neck. He pressed it gently, feeling satisfaction when it ached. He didn’t really understand what had just happened, from the moment Soobin’s lips had touched him it was all a fuzz in his head. Just a buzz of warm, prickly, vaguely electric static. He waddled back to his room lamely, flopped down on the bed and pressed his face into the covers. He didn’t sleep until many hours later, but he couldn’t tell you a single thought he’d had in the meantime.
*****
The next morning was odd. The first time in years that Beomgyu had woken up and Soobin had already left, that is, without a schedule as an excuse. The unit felt empty and cold, and he tried desperately to push away the memories of last December as he brewed his own cup of hot lemon water. Without Soobin there, Beomgyu felt listless and ended up spending most of the day lying in bed, scrolling mindlessly through various social media posts. He was bored - so bored without that warm, annoying, endlessly lovable nerd prodding and poking at him while he tried to rest. Not even a text from him or anything, Beomgyu scowled. Checking Twitter, he liked a few Soogyu edits and fanarts on his burner account, even favouriting one of the pair of them with a little shiba inu that made him feel all warm inside. Then he saw it, and his blood ran cold. He felt sick, nauseous and angry like he had never felt before. He wasn’t entirely sure why it made him begin to panic, but soon enough he was reading with tears blurring his vision.
💬✅@translatingTXT
[260329] weverse dm 🦊💬
🦊 helloooooo
🦊 everyone greet Soobinie too!
🦊 [img.121] image description: Soobin and Yeonjun take a selfie in the booth of a bbq restaurant, Soobin is taking a bite into a pork rib he is holding.
🦊 we had a lunch date earlier hehehe ~~ The food was so good I nearly cried…
🦊 junnie is so full… (cute tone)
As he haphazardly stumbled out of bed, Beomgyu’s foot got caught in a blanket and he felt what even he recognised to be disproportionate rage as he kicked it free. He flung open his door and stomped into the living room, where the culprit was already sitting. He must have come home without him noticing - a bad move on his part. Shoving his phone screen forward and glaring, Beomgyu hissed:
‘What the fuck is this?’
He ignored the look of concern on his friends face, throwing his hands up in the air when he got no response.
‘Well?’
‘Gyu-yah, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?’ Soobin began to stand and made as if he was going to hug him, so Beomgyu flinched back.
‘No - answer me. What is this?’
Soobin finally looked down at the phone in the younger’s hand and furrowed his brow.
‘...A weverse dm?’
‘Yeah.’ Beomgyu couldn’t help the shake in his voice as he tried to stop his tears, ‘Of your ’date’ earlier.’
‘Ah, Beomgyu.’ Soobin sighed, having the fucking nerve to roll his eyes like this wasn’t serious. ‘It wasn’t an actual date, no one thinks that.’
‘Don’t they? Twitter seems convinced.’ Beomgyu began to pace around angrily as he continued, ‘Is this how it’s going to be then? One little fight and you just cheat on me with Yeonjun?’
‘Okay, well, I can’t actually cheat on you, Beomgyu, because we’re not actually together.’
Beomgyu froze. He turned slowly, a seething kind of rage brewing in him that he didn’t fully understand the source of. All he knew was that had been the wrong fucking thing to say.
‘I know that.’ He said quietly, so calmly that it was glaringly obvious to Soobin how massively he’d somehow fucked up.
‘Puppy-’ He tried to appease the man, going to hold him and once again being backed away from.
‘Don’t. Call me that.’ The anger in Beomgyu’s eyes began to mist and turn into tears, face red and blotchy. ‘You’ve lost the right to call me that.’
Soobin’s face fell, his arms limp and useless at his sides as he stood there, completely dumbfounded about what to do. Quietly, beseechingly, he tried again:
‘Beomgyu…’
But his words died on his tongue. He had no idea what to say - he wasn’t even certain about what he’d done so terribly wrong. The younger looked at him expectantly, but seeing he wasn’t going to continue he just hung his head, letting the tears drop to the ground beneath him.
‘Right.’ He choked out, spitting with rage. ‘Thanks for clearing that up.’
Ignoring Soobin’s call of his name, Beomgyu stormed from their flat, crying harder and harder and harder until he realised he’d stopped in front of the main dorm door. Yes, he thought, this was something he could do. He shoved the door open with his spare key, eyes burning with anger as he turned to a wary looking Kai and Taehyun on the couch.
‘Where’s Yeonjun?’
The pair pointed to the kitchen silently, giving each other worried glances as their friend strode briskly from the room.
‘Ah, Beomgy-’ Yeonjun went silent as he took in the sight before him, slowly putting his ice cream tub on the counter as he walked over.
‘Oh, Gyu, what’s wrong?’
He was startled by the venom in the reply, ‘What do you think you’re playing at?’
‘...What do I what now?’
‘Oh don’t act dumb.’ Beomgyu laughed derisively. ‘Telling everyone about your little date earlier. Have fun, did you?’
Still decidedly baffled, Yeonjun opened and closed his mouth a few times while he thought of how to reply. Clearly he had taken too long.
In a terrifyingly menacing whisper, Beomgyu asked, ‘Do you love him?’
It took all the strength in Yeonjun’s body not to face palm in exasperation as he looked up at the ceiling and hid an involuntary roll of his eyes.
‘No, Beomgyu, I don’t. Not like that at least.’
‘Then why- why are you-’ Beomgyu suddenly burst into tears, proper, soul wrenching sobs, going limp in Yeonjun’s arms as the older hugged him tight.
‘It’s okay, Gyu… It’s okay.’
For a while they just stood like that, Yeonjun rubbing his back and humming softly as Beomgyu tried to steady his breathing. When the crying had quietened down some, Yeonjun gently continued,
‘I say stuff like that because it doesn’t mean anything to us, Gyu.’
‘Then why did you- you knew- you knew we were trying to win- why would-’
‘You’re not upset about this because you want to win.’ Yeonjun said, softly but firmly, hushing Beomgyu when he tried to protest.
‘No, you’re not. Listen to hyung. That’s not why, huh?’
Beomgyu frowned, more tears arriving with a slight panic in his eyes.
‘Yes- it is.’
‘Ah, Beomie, you are so stupid. And so is he; he’s not told you.’
‘Told me what?’ He choked out through sniffles, snot staining his face as he hiccuped and cried.
Yeonjun took a deep breath and steadied his nerves. He was going to have to gentle parent this out then, it seemed. He began slowly, like he was talking to a child.
‘Beomgyu, why are you so upset when people say me and Soobin are together?’
‘...Because you’re not?’
Fucking hell, this was going to be like pulling teeth.
‘So why does it feel better when they say you’re together? If you’re also not?’
‘I…’ Beomgyu wiped his nose on his sleeve as he pieced a sentence together. ‘...Because… I like when people can see how close we are.’
‘Right.’ Yeonjun held the other’s face in his hands, forcing them to make eye contact, ‘But why do you not like it when people see how close me and him are?’
‘Because… because it’s not the same.’ Beomgyu whispered, voice shaky, eyes wet with the beginnings of realisation.
‘No, Beomgyu. It’s not.’
‘Oh God.’ The younger man dove back into Yeonjun’s arms, overwhelmed and panicked and trembling, ‘Oh God, I’m going to ruin everything-’
‘Hush, Beomie, no. You’re not. It’s all going to be okay, hyung’s got you.’
And suddenly, arriving in his usual awkward fashion, they heard a voice from next door.
‘Is Beomgyu here? I fucked up.’
‘Yeah, probably.’ Kai deadpanned, pointing to the kitchen again and pretending like the pair hadn’t had their ears pressed up against the walls since the start of the conversation. He and Taehyun followed him with their eyes as he walked over, shaking their heads in pity.
‘Don’t let me be this stupid when I’m older.’ Kai whispered.
‘Don’t worry,’ Taehyun said back, ‘No one can be as stupid as they are.’
When Soobin walked into the kitchen, he barely noticed Yeonjun was there. His eyes zeroed in on Beomgyu, who was frantically rubbing his nose and eyes on the sleeves of his sweater - Soobin’s sweater actually - as he tried to clean his face.
Opening his arms, he said softly ‘Ah Pupp- Beomgyu. Come here.’
Not a second later, Yeonjun’s arms had been abandoned. He would have been offended at the clear favoritism if he wasn’t so sure this was all about to be worked out. It would be removing a serious stress from his life if it was - they’d all been forced to put up with this bullshit for seven years too long already.
‘I’m going to leave. And you are going to talk.’ Yeonjun said, pulling rank as the eldest as he grabbed his ice cream and began to leave. ‘Have an actual proper conversation, not whatever it is you seem to do in your own unit.’
Then silence as the door swung shut. Nothing for a moment but their breathing, slowly syncing up as being back in Soobin’s arms managed to calm Beomgyu enough to stop crying.
‘I’m sorry for not taking the ranking seriously, Gyu-yah. I know they’re important to you.’
‘No… They’re not.’
Soobin furrowed his brow and grunted dumbly ‘Uh? They’re not?’ So that was his whole apology plan gone out the window - what was he meant to be saying sorry for now?
‘I never really cared, I don’t think, Soobin.’
‘You didn’t?’
Beomgyu laughed softly, voice still thick with emotion. ‘Do something other than repeat what I’m saying, idiot.’
‘I- Uh. Don’t really know what’s happening… Why are you upset, then?’
Beomgyu rolled his eyes, acting like he hadn’t just figured this out moments ago too, and with considerable help.
‘Because you were out with Yeonjun hyung. On a date.’
‘But… not because of the Ao3 thing?’
‘No, Soobin, not because of that.’
Beomgyu looked up at him with his puffy red eyes, blotchy cheeks, and worried little arrow of a shy smile - and Soobin could have sworn he’d never seen anything more beautiful.
‘I’m so in love with you, Gyu-yah.’ He finally murmured, wiping the new tears from the younger man’s cheeks.
‘Mm. Call me puppy.’
‘Puppy. I’m so in love with you.’ Soobin indulged, because he’d do anything really. If Beomgyu asked. And so it was no surprise that when the next request came in, he couldn’t have stopped himself if he tried.
‘Kiss me, hyung. Please?’