Chapter Text
Hal Jordan was in the unfortunate position of having arrived first for a Justice League meeting. It was a well known fact amongst the league that Batman almost always arrived first for the scheduled ones and that meant that, as a general rule, Hal avoided getting early to those. For obvious reasons. Those being that he didn’t particularly enjoy waiting alone with the Bat. The Gothamite was unnerving, alright? However this time, Hal unfortunately arrived first due to specific space travel issues he would like to not think about. Which left Hal with two choices really. He could either go to his quarters to catch his breath until the meeting, or he could bite the bullet and just take his seat on the oval table. It wasn’t like Batman was going to bite Hal’s head off for being early. And all the kids apparently liked Batman so it wasn’t like Hal would suffer by spending some time alone with him. Only he would. Hal knew he would!
As the distinct sound of footsteps echoed down the corridor, Hal’s choices were vastly diminished. But he’d had a very bad trip back and he would rather he didn’t accidentally trigger a bat lecture at the moment. So Hal, in all his wisdom, did not enter the meeting room. Instead he hurriedly hid in a broom closet a few steps away. But just as the shadow of Batman fell through the crack of the door, Hal heard the distinct sound of laughing. He peered through the door just in time to see Green Arrow of all people finish his laugh and place a hand over Batman’s shoulder. That was irregular enough that Hal knew he had to investigate. It concerned the integrity of two league members. Because whatever he’d just seen was definitely not normal.
No-one could blame Hal for silently making his way to the door of the meeting room and peering inside. Not even Batman. If one thought about it, paranoid and suspicious Batman would’ve been praising Hal. It still didn’t keep Hal from wanting to be as silent as possible to avoid getting discovered. Because, compromised or not, Hal did not want to fight the Bat of Gotham. Still, Hal couldn’t deny that what started as an investigation turned to curious snooping as he heard the decidedly non growled voice of Batman.
“And remind me again why I was drunk around the Trevi fountain in the first place?” Batman pointed out teasingly and Hal knew that if things didn’t go back to normal soon he would have to go get checked. Or he’d accidentally travelled to another universe again, which really that was preferable to whatever else this could be.
“Oh come on! How was I supposed to know the hotel manager would kick us out for diving in the pool!” Green Arrow shrugged with the smile of someone who was reliving fond memories, no matter his grumbling.
“You dove in from the second floor balcony”, Batman deadpanned, and although the growl was back in his voice, his tone was much more relaxed.
“Fine”, Arrow conceded, “What about next day? You abandoned me to spend the night with the evil twins! We called them evil for a reason, B!”
There was that nickname again! When did Green Arrow begin using it? Why was Batman letting him? Green Arrow was definitely not the batkids’ friend. Not like the younger heroes were.
“We also called them the hot evil twins”, Batman huffed a laugh, “Do you really need me to explain that?”
“You always had a thing for the trouble”, Green Arrow shook his head fondly. With a smile. As if he was talking about how they used to drink their coffee in college before they could afford the good stuff or something. Hal was really curious now to see where that conversation went, but at that moment Superman placed a hand on his shoulder causing Hal to yelp in surprise (but at least he didn’t scream so that was that) and the conversation was dropped. All the explanation the league got was an excited “Apparently Batman and I used to be best friends when we were kids!” that did nothing to explain anything Hal had just seen.
What followed was a normal Justice League meeting. They discussed plans and strategies, reported suspicions and thoughts and future obligations. Pretty normal stuff. Nothing special. Until it came time to end the meeting. Superman turned to talk, but instead of dismissing the league he brought attention back to what Hal had overheard.
“I didn’t mean to overhear your conversation earlier”, Superman prefaced and both Batman and Green Arrow tensed, “but Arrow said that you dated the evil twins?”
“He did”, Batman replied in the same tone and manner as if he was confirming the time.
“Who are these evil twins, Batman?” Wonder Woman demanded, obviously gearing up to fight these new adversaries she knew nothing about.
“Our high school’s mean girls”, Green Arrow rushed to reply before this turned out of hand.
“Oh”, the Flash exclaimed with a bit of disappointment mixed in with his relief.
“Yeah”, Green Arrow agreed and then straightened up as he obviously thought of something, “It doesn’t mean it’s not an issue.”
“How so?” Batman asked, and Hal could swear he sounded amused. That couldn’t be right! This was the Bat’s personal life that was being discussed. Spooky was never amused by that.
“Because”, the green-clad archer explained slowly, “your taste for criminals could get you compromised.”
“I don’t think high school mean girls are exactly criminals”, Flash commented while trying to unwrap a protein bar.
“And high school was a long time away”, Aquaman added, which earned him a glare from Green Arrow.
“You would think so”, the archer muttered before turning his attention back to Batman, “But what about Robin’s mother?”
“What about her?” Batman asked, and there was the familiar growled warning in his voice that Hal had been missing. Things might finally be getting back to normal, Hal thought with a great deal of relief.
“She’s the mother of your son”, the blond explained, “and evil, the kind we deal with.”
“That won’t be an issue”, Batman dismissed.
“Are you sure?” It was Superman this time and Hal had half a mind to agree with the kryptonian. Familial connections were hard to overcome. Even for someone as emotionless as Batman. He’d at least felt something enough to have a kid with that mysterious evil woman. But, Hal had to reason, of course it would be some kind of evil woman, because how else would a woman in her right mind not be afraid of mister dark and spooky? The nightmare and vengeance of Gotham couldn’t exactly be an approachable dude, Hal was sure.
“I can honestly say that Robin’s mother won’t be any more dangerous because of her connection to either me or my son”, Batman announced with conviction. And honestly? Hal was inclined to believe him. This was such a paranoid man that his contingency plans had contingency plans that had their own contingency plans and so on. He’d created plans to neutralize each and every single one of the league members if they chose to go to the dark side. Batman would surely have taken care of any and all possibilities regarding Robin’s mother.
“I believe you”, the Martian Manhunter echoed the sentiment of Hal’s thoughts. Most of the rest of the team nodded their heads in agreement. Flash nodded so enthusiastically a few crumbs from his protein bar landed next to Hal’s gloved hand, which he surreptitiously moved away from the wayward food. Only Green Arrow didn’t nod. He shook his head in dismay instead. But before he had a chance to protest, Wonder Woman dismissed the meeting. Hal didn’t need to be told twice. He quickly made his way to his quarters to catch some much needed sleep. He did not need to make any more unexpected revelations that day! What he’d found out already was enough. More than enough! He could let his curiosity run rampant after he got some shut eye. Yeah, that was the plan!