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Ze just happened to walk into the wrong store.
It wasn't intentional! He was rarely in this part of a city and unfortunately lost Moe along with Regect somewhere between the main street and nearby alleys. He was sure that they were fine so instead of searching he kept walking around, buying all the necessities that had been written on a list.
He just somehow did not notice the giant sign with a sparkly lady-like font at the top of the building before opening an intricate door leading to the Couture House.
A man like him had nothing to do inside. He was startled by all the exquisite furniture and bright lights shining straight into his face.
He was going to leave immediately as he realised his mistake. But right then, in front of him stood a dress that demanded his attention, put on full display.
It was a soft pink color, with a long, swooping hemline. The skirt had layers upon layers of flounce, flatter gracefully. It was fitted at the waist, with long sleeves, but a low-cut V neckline...
it was... cute.
Ze wasn't blind to try and deny it, the dress was obviously expensive and made with lots of hard-work, its fabric looked especially delicate. A literal Disney princess could have put it on and it would have fit perfectly.
He was wondering how much it cost. Not like he was going to buy it or anything, just out of curiosity. He normally did not have any reason to visit a place like this.
He stepped closer.
"Hello, how can I help you? Are you looking for a gift?"
"Oh-" Ze felt like he just got caught at a crime scene. Startled, he tried to ignore how his face darken to a reddish color. He was going to deny everything, but that would have made him look even weirder, so he panicked instead. "Yeah! Um- I... For my friend"
The store assistant smiled at him, and suddenly Ze was walking all around the shop, looking at different dresses, skirts, and nightgowns. Beautiful, dainty, incredibly soft to the touch. They captivated his attention easily.
Ze thought about Moe. She was not going to wear that. She always had very specific clothes that were perfect for performing all sorts of tricks, colorful in her own palette.
He really had no one to gift it to, no reason to buy it, no excuse-
So what was he doing exactly? What was he looking for? It's just a stupid fancy dress.
He felt sick to his stomach, guilty for even being here, all the emotions painfully squeezing his chest at once.
He was just wasting time.
Ze's eyes kept going back to the dress at the front of the shop. There was something about it. Sure, all things here were pretty, but that specific dress just stuck in his mind, with all of its polished details, all the little strings and pieces, coming together perfectly.
Ze refused to think about it as something more than curiosity. That would make him...
He couldn't.
It wasn't right.
He realized that he wasn't breathing. A short gasp escaped from him and he only now noticed how fast his heart was beating. Every hit went straight to his ears.
Ze ran to the bathroom.
He needed a second, a minute, anything he could have, taken.
Ze turned the water on in the sink and immediately splashed his face.
It was cold.
His view was dizzy with water in his eyes, his breath still loud, his hands still shaking.
He looked up at the mirror in front of him. It was the same aesthetic as the rest of the shop.
Cute.
Pink.
Girly.
He stared at the reflection.
A tired man was staring back at him.
It was ridiculous how much he stood out.
He was never supposed to be here.
Out of place.
A thousand thoughts spun in Ze's head. It was wrong. It was wrong. It was always wrong. It NEVER felt right.
It never will.
He wanted to rip the skin off his face, till nothing identifiable was left. He couldn't. So he stuck his hands under the cold water letting it run through his fingers for as long as he could feel them.
It didn't hurt as much as it used too.
Ze wanted to leave the bathroom and run home as fast as he could. To get under his bedsheets, to hide his face in his pillow, to just disappear.
He left the bathroom and went straight to the exit.
But he had to turn around. Just one more time. And as he did, he once more couldn't look away from the dress.
He wanted it. It was so fucking pretty. He just wanted it so much.
For what? He couldn't gift it to anyone, he couldn't wear it! Obviously he just... It wouldn't fit. It would never, and it was ridiculous to even think about.
But he still wanted it.
It was a waste of money.
But it was pretty.
It was useless.
But it was pretty.
It was embarrassing.
But it was so pretty.
...
What was he thinking? What would his father say?
Regect and Moe soon found him alone on the streets sidewalk, excited to show him their findings from the day out but both quickly noticing his weird behaviour.
Ze told them he was tired and wanted to go home.
He just wanted to forget all of this.
...
But he couldn't.
Days went by, and he was still thinking about that dress. It didn't help that Moe and Regect kept insisting on going to that area of the city again. They really liked the zoo that was down the street.
Moe loved looking at pandas. Ze kept saying that with Regect around, it’s always a zoo in their house and Regect would hit him back with "At least my brain didn’t evolve from monkeys”.
Ze was having fun hanging out with his friends. but the store just... It was always in the back of his mind whenever they were leaving.
And some part of Ze wanted to see if the dress was still there. The thought of someone buying it made him feel uncomfortable, but at the same time, maybe if it was gone he would be able to move on and forget it.
"You know you can go inside right? There's doors and stuff" Regect's voice broke the silence, making Ze flinch in surprise.
"What the hell are you talking about?" He got defensive immediately.
"Every time we're here you stare at that store" Moe honked a couple of times in agreement. They were not convinced at all with his act.
...Was he that obvious?
"I don't stare!" Ze denied, looking anywhere but at his friends. Damn his white skin that made his embarrassment easily visible.
"Why are you screaming at me!?"
"Because you're dumb? They sell dresses. Do I look like I can wear a dress!?" He freaked out.
"Well you'd probably look good in one!"
They both went completely silent.
Regect did not mean to say that. Not in this way. It was awkward.
Ze blinked slowly, turning his head towards the entity.
"Wh- What?" He stutter.
"I mean. You would look BETTER. I'm just saying that your ugly ass could benefit from some cute clothing" It tried to defend itself. Ze's demeanor changed quickly in response.
"YOU DON'T EVEN WEAR CLOTHES!" What right does this creature have to say anything about his wardrobe!? For all he knew, Reject was just always naked! Wait, scratch that. Thats not a thought Ze needs in his head.
"Yeah, and I look stunning anyway"
"No you're not! Whoever told you that was probably making a bad joke-" they would have just kept arguing until the sun went down or Ze started shooting Regect, but luckily Moe was with them. She honked loudly, making both of them shut up.
She grabbed Ze's sleeve in one hand, and Regect’s collar in the other, dragging them both inside the shop.
None of them were going to mess with Moe when she was this determined.
As they got closer to the door, Ze felt pure horror growing, he wanted to run, make a scene, anything! But instead... he just froze.
As soon as they got inside, Ze stared at the dress, immediately captivated.
It somehow looked even better than the last time he saw it...
"Oh so that's the one?" Regect said, whistling "It looks like your size. Come on, try it on"
"Are you insane it's obviously too small-"
Moe honked, looking at the label.
"We can ask for a bigger one if it won't fit, just try this first"
Just like that, Ze was locked in a dressing room, with the pink dress of his dreams in his hands.
This is dumb.
This is so, so dumb.
There is no way it will look good, and there is absolutely no way it'll fit.
The fabric is nice at least...
"Come on, the store is not going to be open forever!" The entity's annoyed voice broke the silence. Honk. "Ugh, okay Moe I'm sorry... Take your time Ze."
He can try it on. And take it off. Tell them it didn't fit, he didn't like it, and he was born a man, so he shouldn't wear pink dresses.
And that's it. He didn't have to do anything else.
He took off his shirt but kept on his pants. He tried working around the ties on the back of the dress, hands sweating, his heart beating way too fast. What was he so nervous about? It's just a fucking dress.
It got stuck around his hips when he tried to put it on, but only a little bit. Moe was right, it was his size.
He froze, staring at the reflection.
He felt the urge to cry.
It was cute.
It looked okay. Not as bad as he thought it would, at least. Walls didn't shake and the ground didn't disappear beneath him. It was okay.
He was fine.
Ze spun around. The skirt followed his movements slowly, making it look even more charming. It was so sparkly.
He felt his shoulders shaking. He didn't want to take it off.
He heard a short honk behind the door. It took him a moment to respond, trying to keep his voice steady.
"No, it's... It's the right size"
"Then show us already!" Regect complained. Ze felt his hands sweating even more. It was suddenly so hot, the little air in this room started to thin somehow.
"You have to promise you won't laugh."
"Why would I laugh?" It sounded so genuine. Ze didn't know what to say.
Because he was wearing the most pink-cutesie dress there ever was?
"Just promise!" Moe honked in agreement almost immediatly.
"Okay, whatever man. I won't." He could hear Regect rolling its non existent eyes from its tone.
"I mean it!" His voice betrayed him at the end, sounding desperate.
"I mean it too! I'm not going to laugh Ze, I promise" That gave him little to no comfort.
Ze took breath of air, trying to calm himself.
His hand shakily grabbed the door handle, before he said to himself "Fuck it" and opened the door.
"It fits- somehow. You happy now!?"
The room went silent.
Oh, it was wrong.
He looked weird. Fuck, he knew it was a horrible idea. Why did he let them convince him to even step in this building. Regect will never stop mocking him because of this-
Moe's loud honking and excited clapping cut him off guard.
Did she just call him a princess?
"Huh? No I- Do you really think so...?" Ze asked flustered. Moe honked again. The way she actually said it so genuinely made him feel a little better.
Regect, the fucking bitch it is, dared to turn around, trying to hide its non existent face with its hand. That pissed Ze off.
Was it actually laughing at him!?
"Hey! you're not even going to look at me? This was your dumb idea!" He complained, not knowing where to put his hands due to the dress not having any pockets. Maybe he should put them on Regect's neck.
"It looks good, okay!" It screamed. Moe hit it slightly on the shoulder, and with a sigh it turned around again. "And that means I'm RIGHT- You- Uh..." Well, now it was just silently staring.
Ze felt an urge to cover his chest, but that would be... Gay(?) Something like that.
...
Wait.
Was it... Blushing? He wasn't sure but a blur of something yellow was certainly all around its neck.
After a few seconds, Regect started coughing.
"Yeah. Like I said. You look good." Ze refused to unpack this.
"Sure. Great. Let's go home now"
Moe honked. Ze shook his head.
"No, its expensive, and why would I need it?" He stared at himself at the mirror. There is no way he's going to wear this outside. Or at the very least, in public.
"You're not going to buy it!?" Regect suddenly remembered how to speak full sentences again.
"Well, DUH, genius. Do you think I can go mining or fishing in this!?"
"I... I mean we could go to some fancy restaurant or something" Moe honked excitedly. "Yeah! What Moe said! We can find some occasion"
"Uh... It's expensive" Ze protested.
"Oh please, it's not even half of what I lost on slots yesterday" Regect brushed him off.
"SO YOU WERE GAMBLING WITH MY MONEY!" Ze took a step closer to the entity. The only thing stopping him from a fist fight was the long sleeves of the dress. Regect backed up.
"Not the point! Just get this dumb dress and let's go already!"
Ze's excuses started to run out.
He looked at the mirror.
He was still a man. Still tired. But... He looked happier. He looked comfortable.
"...Okay" He sighed "let's get it"
Moe jumped in the air, playing her little drum. Ze knew Regect was also smiling... Smug bustard.
Ze looked down at the skirt "You know, with all those layers, it would be pretty easy to hide a gun or two..." Moe slowly turned her head towards Regect. They stared at each other for a few seconds silently. "What!? What did I say??" Ze shouted, both of them laughed, making him even more frustrated.
Well, it wasn't all that bad.
Maybe one day... He’ll wear it again.