Chapter Text
Sam sat back on her couch and sighed. She wrapped the blanket she had thrown over her shoulders earlier in the evening tighter around herself, trying and failing to persuade her tired body that she was held and safe.
God but she was tired. She just wished her brain would get the memo and let her settle, in bed or on the couch she didn’t really care at this point, but every time sleep started to creep up on her she would startle back awake, her subconscious telling her something was wrong, missing his presence and finding her house too quiet.
She let out a frustrated groan before she reached for the warm mug and the phone that sat on the low coffee table in front of her. She wrapped a hand round the mug as she hugged it to her, enjoying its grounding warmth. With her other she weighed the phone, looking at it in much the same way she did an alien artifact she was half convinced was about to blow up in her face.
She’d promised herself as she left the mountain for their enforced downtime that she wouldn’t call him, but it felt like every part of her ached to be in his presence. To feel safe. She snorted, frustrated with herself, she was home, on her own couch and perfectly safe. It felt too quiet though, too lonely after so long in close quarters. She knew she should feel relieved but somehow, this time she was having real problems re-adjusting.
She wasn’t sure she could fight the urge any more though, the more she tried to push it down the worse she felt. Her mind constantly drifting back to the look on his face as he’d sadly repeated her ‘Sir’ earlier in the day as their memories returned, before he’d pulled his professional mask on and turned away. They’d been through so much over the years but that had almost broken her, she wasn’t sure it hadn’t, actually. She wondered if he was having the same problem, sitting in his house thinking about her. She mentally shook herself and checked her watch, quarter after one in the morning. He was more than likely asleep, he’d been as exhausted as she was. What would she say anyway ‘Hi Sir, I can’t seem to sleep without you’.
Despite her internal monologue it seemed her body was ignoring her brain as before she really registered the action she was halfway through dialling his number. She paused to take a deep breath before pressing the next number.
Her finger was hovering over the next when the phone sprang to life in her hand, the loud blare of the ring startling her so much she almost dropped it. Recovering she hit the answer button and bought it to her ear.
“Carter”
“Hey” his voice was quiet. She wondered if he’d been surprised that she’d picked up. She closed her eyes as she felt her tight shoulder muscles relax a little as he asked gently “Did I wake you?, I’m sorry, I couldn’t…” he sounded a little guilty and trailed off.
“No” She laughed humourlessly, “I ah, I was actually half way through calling you” she admitted figuring they might as well be honest with each other now.
She heard him sigh heavily, “couldn’t sleep?” he asked
“Hmm, I’m exhausted but every time I get close I jolt awake because there’s something missing” she admitted softly.
“Yeah” he agreed heavily.
She took a mouthful of her warm cocoa while she waited for him to say something else. He must have correctly identified what she was doing because the next thing he said was “What ya drinking?”
She smiled a little as she answered, pulling the cup back into her chest for the warmth. “Cocoa. Thought it might help. Not sure it is but the warm mug is nice”
“Ah, I went for beer.”
There was another pause
“Carter, I shouldn’t be thinking this never mind asking but…” he trailed off unable to find the right way to finish that didn’t sound like an order rather than the request he wanted it to be. It didn’t matter, as always she was right there with him.
“I’ll be there in 10, Sir”
She didn’t bother with the niceties of ending a call just disconnected and stood up. She didn’t change from her comfortable sweats either, just jammed her feet, fluffy socks and all into her boots and scooped up her car keys. She didn’t waste time collecting anything else to take, she had a bug out bag in the car and spare clothes at the Colonel’s house anyway. After a few close calls all of SG-1 kept changes at each others houses.
She was out of her door in under 30 seconds, into her car and pulling out of her driveway moments later. Soon she was pulling up in front of his house, unsurprised to see him opening the door as she killed the engine.
As she walked the short distance towards him she noted that he looked as exhausted as she felt.
“Carter” he greeted quietly as she reached the door and he stepped aside to allow her entry.
“Sir” she responded just as softly as she stopped and turned back towards him in the hallway as he closed the door before turning to her. They stood and stared at each other for a long moment before he broke eye contact to sweep his gaze over her, checking she was physically OK. Uncharacteristic uncertainty flickered over his face before he spoke again
“Jack” he offered up with a slight raise of his eyebrow in question.
She closed her eyes against a wave of feeling, then pinned him in her gaze as she acknowledged the changes that had occurred between them.
“Jack” she agreed with a tentative smile.
His whole body visibly relaxed and he gave her one of those half smiles that she loved as he opened his arms in invitation “Come here, Sam”. Within moments she was wrapped in his embrace in a full body hug, his face finding the hollow of her neck as he had before when they had escaped death at Hathor’s hands. She gripped him fiercely, this, he was exactly what she had been missing. She could relax now.
They stayed that way for an unidentifiable amount of time until a loud yawn escaped from her. “Sorry” she muttered against his shoulder.
He pulled back slightly so he could peer down at her face then stepped back breaking their embrace but capturing one of her hands in his instead. “Come on” he told her as he tugged gently, leading her deeper into the house.
They passed the steps that led down to his living room and she frowned in thought “Where are we going?”
“Bed” he informed her, matter of factly. “Sleep, we’re both exhausted”
“Yeah” she agreed as another yawn cracked her face.
He smiled softly, “clearly we also need to talk about whatever the hell is going on here but we’re not going to achieve anything helpful this tired”
She was too emotionally and physically exhausted to stop herself from vocalising her thoughts about that as she practically whined “I’m terrible at talking about stuff like that”
He let out a short laugh, startled by her honesty “Not sure I’m any better at it, Carter, but we’ll muddle though” His tone became more serious “I think we have to, not sure we’re fitting it back in the room this time.”
Against her will she felt her eyes fill and she gave him a small smile “I know”
“Hey” he squeezed her hand as she wiped her free one across her eyes, “none of that now. C’mon, sleep and things will feel better.”
She nodded and let him continue leading her through the house and into the bathroom. He let go of her to root through the bathroom cabinet, retrieving a fresh toothbrush and tube of toothpaste which he handed to her silently.
She accepted them without comment and side by side they brushed their teeth, shoulders almost brushing as they shared space at the sink. That done she gestured over at the toilet “I’m gonna…”
He nodded and left the room, giving her privacy to finish making herself comfortable before bed. As she exited the room minutes later he swapped places with her until the were both back in the hallway and ready to proceed.
They entered his room close together, Sam automatically moving round for the right hand side of the bed while Jack went left. They had shared enough tents and other sleeping accommodations over the years to be aware of each others preferences.
Sam shed her jumper and socks before practically crawling under the covers, tucking them up under her chin as was her want when she was particularly tired and didn’t have to be on alert. She gave a happy little sigh as the warmth of the bed surrounded her along with the comforting scent of her commanding officers preferred detergent. The man himself settled in next to her and she stretched out a hand to him under the covers, smiling happily as he took it in his.
“G’night, Jack” she told him sleepily, her brain finally getting the message that it was safe to sleep.
“Night, Carter. Sweet dreams” he let his eyes drift closed, content in the knowledge that she was safe next to him.