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As the crushing pressure lifted and frantic screams exploded into the night, awareness slipped through Uranus' desperate fingers.
His vision darkened, eyes fluttering closed, heavy with the pain and exhaustion pushing his body down, down, down into the eternal darkness below. Visions of blurry faces faded, taking hope along with it as they disappeared. No, no, no! Don't leave him here please. Bloody hell, it's–he's…
Panic cut through the mush, pushing back–fighting back–as he scrambled, grasping at the invisible tendrils leading him back to the light.
…only to be yanked away from the beacon of hope as heavy, suffocating weights tied to each of his limbs, dragging him further away from the voices–from life. The shadows wrapped around him, ripping him away from the only life he'd ever known. No. No. Please don't leave him. Come back! Please! Bloody hell it–it can't take him away. No, no no no no he's not ready to leave. He's not ready to say goodbye. There's still so much to live for. So much he hasn't done.
So much he would never get to do again.
Grief panged in his core, burning behind his eyes, and yet even that was quickly whipped away. Fear, panic, confusion–all were lost to the growing void on its quest to consume everything. It relentlessly drowned any semblance of feeling in the dark, cold, and forever empty oceans sloshing in his core, leaving Uranus with numbness.
Outside, his strangled, gasping breaths heaved, dying on his tongue as foreign screams echoed in his ears. The shattered voices sounded so close and yet so far away…please come back. Water filled his ears, mouth, eyes, muddled voices barely breaking through the slush of his mind. Where…where are you?
The soft pressure of little bodies slumped around him, pushing through his mushy atmosphere–but he was only focused on the moons.
His cherished treasures, dropping like flies.
No…no please…they needed him. He needed them. They were his moons; he was their planet.
He loved them so much.
And yet that didn’t stop their tiny forms from collapsing, terror-struck screams cutting off into silence as the heat became too much for them to bear.
Moons. Danger. Death—
A wave of sudden and complete horror crashed over him, carrying him up above the sea of nothingness and allowing Uranus, for a split second, to be gifted the light of clarity.
Bloody–bloody hell he could hear them. Screaming, crying, begging, but there were voices. Clear, beautiful voices that stirred recognition, warming his core with love and hope.
Yes, yes they could help! They could fix this! It would be oka–
The pain hit him like a bus, sudden, intense, and overwhelming.
Fire consumed him, and the attempt of a scream failed on gurgling breaths, thick sludge filling his throat. No no no no he can't–gagging, coughing, choking–needs air. He can't, he can't–his body stiffened, tensing up with lips parted in a strained, breathless gasp–he can't breathe–
His eyes rolled to the back of his head, body gripped with sudden, violent seizing, the eternal darkness collapsing back over him.
"Stars no–!"
"–nus! Stay with…fight–"
The sweet, wonderful voices faded, descending into gibberish and lost to the chaos of his screaming mind. No no no please–the faces crouching over him vanished in the expanding dark, any and all hope dying with it. The weights returned, latching tightly onto his body and dragging him deeper into the darkness.
No matter how hard Uranus fought, he couldn’t break free. No, no he had to–he couldn't give up. Not…not now. Not when he had–had something to fight for…
Something–something, why can't he…
He can't remember.
Oh.
Numbness overtook the planet, drawing him away from the suffering and into the nothingness, thoughts moving slower and slower and slower…
Until the last thread of connection snapped.
And he was falling.
Body limp like a carcass, unblinking eyes staring up into the void. Something…was something up there? Above him, somewhere he couldn’t see? No, nothing there. Silly thought. No remnants of hope remained for him. No one last, desperate attempt at chasing the light.
Nope. Just drifting throughout the empty vacuum of time and space.
Frozen, his limbs remained, uselessly floating in front of him as he continued tumbling into the inky depths below. Any thought–any emotion–bounced off the thick pressure enveloping him, mind empty and devoid of life. Just like him. Just like everything surrounding him.
Dull, thrumming neutrality wormed its way throughout himself, the ever-still atmosphere of his surroundings sending waves of soothing calmness.
Hmm…this was nice. Calm. Peaceful.
The silence lie unbroken by sudden exclamations of surprise. No voices bugged him every second of his existence. He could hear himself think, if there were any thoughts drifting through his mind. Undisturbed, peace and quiet settled, wrapping around him like a thick blanket.
Mmm, he could get used to this.
(The serenity kept him from fighting back. Suppressed any and all feelings to remain content with the state he was in.
The process would go more smoothly if he didn’t resist its influence.)
A rope–an invisible one wrapped tight around his core–tugged, slowly pulling him down. Where was down, well he didn't know. Left, right, up, down, it didn't matter, everything was the same, purple-black mixture of color, moving and collapsing within itself in the background.
Wow…
It was beautiful. The colors melted into one another, mixing together like paint–familiarity buzzed somewhere in the back of his mind, but it was gone as soon as it came–and pulling him into its brilliance. Pretty colors…so very pretty…easily capturing his attention, blocking everything out but the shifting hues.
The trance kept him docile, the invisible tether luring him deeper into the depths. It didn't matter where it was taking him, he only ever needed to gaze upon the show of wondrous colors.
This was his purpose. He didn't dare to look away (could he even? If he tried, could he fight back against death's hold? Or was it, like everything else, inevitable and hopeless to fight against…), trapped in the radiance of colors.
But as he stayed, hypnotized by the moving blob of purple and black…a golden twinkle caught his eye.
It started off small, barely a dot in the distance, insignificant in the grand wall of wonders. But…but for some odd reason Uranus was drawn to it. It was different from the shifting colors, who captured his mind to replace it with emptiness…no, this had a sharp edge to it, a yearning for something more.
Curiosity–an actual, real emotion–cut through the sludge, a new tether wrapping itself around his body to pull him closer to the growing golden sparkle.
The hands dragging him into the darkness weakened, slipping away as the sparkle grew brighter, blossoming around him like beautiful flowers. The wall of nothingness shifted, earning Uranus another feeling as it cracked and crumbled: determination.
He needed to follow it.
With newfound purpose, summoning strength to his sluggish limbs and setting his mind free from the clutches of the trance, he floated forward. A slight pain rang in his core, discomfort twisting into it, the string meant to drag him down fraying as it stretched.
He pushed forward, stumbling as the rope tied to his core snapped. Freedom. He was so close. So close to escaping and returning home. Family. Love.
Hope filled his being, the growing, golden glimmer shining in his eyes.
He can do this.
The brilliance exploded in front of his eyes, quickly enveloping the darker colors–and with it, the fog blocking his mind dissolved. More thoughts and emotions bubbled up, swirling throughout his mind as Uranus finally processed feelings.
Fear came first, a feeling of Wrong heightening every sense—wait, he had senses now? Since when did…
Oh thank the bloody stars.
It–it was going to be okay. He could feel things now, so…so he had to be alive! The connection with life still rippled within him–dying people didn't feel that (...right?) so he wasn't dying! He…he wasn't going to die. Oh what a glorious day!!!
Stars above, he missed feeling feelings. Fear and pain spear-headed the operation, and even if those weren’t the nicest of emotions, it was still something.
Anything was better than the detached, frozen trance controlling his every move.
Warm fuzz filled his core, and Uranus blinked, the subtle heat growing brighter as slow waves of awareness returned. A flicker of pain here, the call of a voice there, it licked at the edges of his mind, slowly swelling stronger and clearer. Excitement thrummed beneath his surface, buzzing with anxious anticipation.
Pulling him further away from the scary, inky pit of darkness, the golden glow enveloping him in soft, kind arms.
Please. Please, he’s so close.
The brilliant light around him sharpened, staining everything in a blinding radiance as he winced. But despite the intensity, it still wrapped around him in a comforting embrace, whispering quietly in his ears. He welcomed the soft murmurs with open arms, latching onto the wonderful sound of their voice as it echoed throughout his mind. The words melted together in a confusing mess, but he didn’t need to hear them to understand the chants of the ancient tongue.
“………make the clock reverse………”
“……heal what has been hurt……”
“…change the Fates’ design…”
“Bring back what once was mine.”
The gold exploded into one last, brilliant burst of energy, pumping through Uranus and carrying him up, up, up–
And suddenly he was back in his body.
Sounds erupted around him–panicked shrieks, wails, sobs laced with pain–but the only thing that managed to get through, were the anguished pleads coming from somewhere above him. Repeating over and over again, broken only by heavy pants.
The arms around him tightened, pressing his hot, flushed cheeks further against their chest–Uranus faintly recognizing the fast, thumping core-beat drumming underneath. Jagged, dizzying movement jostled his body, the arms holding him shifting again with another hitching breath.
Aching pain flowed through his limp limbs, core tight and too-warm and just wrong. A pounding throb hammered in his head, ears ringing and quickly drowning out the voices. He…no…his body didn't respond when he tried to move, instead letting out a low, pained sound as the pain spiked again.
The golden light sparked back up, bright even behind his shut eyelids.
Sweet, wonderful relief pushed back the hurt, the tension in his body unwinding as he slumped back into the trembling arms. His head lolled limply, resting against the warm chest, summoning all of his strength to get his exhausted, half-lidded eyes to flutter open.
Vision hazy and too-dark, consciousness still fading in and out, he barely managed to find the face hovering above him. Thank you…he tried, only managing a broken hitch of a purr.
"Ur–Uranus!"
Saturn…
The movement slowed–and he abruptly realized he was being carried. Which, normally would've embarrassed him into wriggling free…only his entire body felt like it had just been thrown into a bloody planet-sized blender. No matter how hard he willed his limbs to move, the thick sludge of his body pressed down on him, cutting off any hope of doing anything.
The small, weak thread of vision he had left swam, the entire stars-damned universe tilting as the pressure of the arms under him suddenly disappeared.
No!
Stars no no no no…
Is he–did Saturn–
"Hey–hey, I'm here Uranus. It's okay." Fingers brushed a strand of damp hair out of his eyes, cupping his cheeks with gentle hands. Cold rings pressed into his flushed cheeks, a welcomed distraction from the heat gripping his body. Bloody hell everything felt so hot. He relaxed into touch, whining when gravity rippled and Saturn suddenly moved away. Again.
His head rolled to the side, sluggishly following the motions of the blurry blobs of figures.
Pink. Gold. Blue.
Overlapping voices suddenly became crystal-clear, his vision sharpening for a moment as movement dropped in front of him.
And Uranus' labored gasps stilled, breaths choking as Neptune's limp, mangled body–almost unrecognizable–filled the space in front of him.
Neptune…Neptune no…please no not you too…
His vision blurred, but whether it was from tears or his weakening state, he didn't know. Darkness crept back at the edges, fear strangling every gasping breath, silently begging for Neptune to wake up. Please…please Neppy don't leave him like this…Warm liquid ran down his face, a mix of hot sobs and his own, melted atmosphere turned to mush.
Pain tore through his back, wails catching uselessly in his throat, but the numbness had already returned. Without warning, it reached up, swallowing him whole despite the sudden rush of expanding gold. Terrified shouts, begs to stay awake and fight…fell to deaf ears.
It's okay, the words of Saturn repeated endlessly in his mind, his eyes slipping shut as his thoughts dimmed and quieted, it's okay it's okay it's okay.
Something…something felt different this time.
More certain.
Final.
I'm sorry…he thought, a final, single tear streaking down his face…I tried Saturn…I tried…but……but I'm just…so…….tired………..
Two twin, anguished screams drowned in the dark ocean, the crashing waves plunging Uranus deep into the eternal sea as everything faded to nothing.
Uranus awoke with a strangled gasp.
His eyes snapped open, peaceful, twinkling stars shining above him, a sharp contrast to the panic gripping his core. His scream quickly died with the quick, heaving breaths ripping through his lips, drowning out the surprised exclamation coming from somewhere behind him. Wha–what. No no no–he was–did he? Hands scrambled at his jacket, suddenly so hot despite the frigid chill of his orbit.
Gravity rippled, gently pulling on him from behind, soft and kind like a loving embrace. No no no no–his shoulders shook, keeling over with his arms tightly hugging himself, desperately trying to get rid of the terror choking every breath. It can't be true. It can't. Someone–anyone–tell him it was just a figment of his imagination. Please. Please please please. Blinking back the tears pricking at the edges of his vision, shaky, uneven breaths slipped past his gritted teeth.
I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry–
"Uranus?"
Cold fingers brushed over his skin, a hand softly squeezing his shoulder in a motion that hitched his breath again. Gravity further wrapped around him, his surface tingling under the warm, gentle pressure. On instinct, he leaned into the wonderful hold, somehow knowing that it was safe. Loving. Caring.
The hand turned him around, pulling him straight into Saturn's protective arms. Without missing a beat, Uranus wrapped his arms tight around the taller like he was never letting go. Stars above…Saturn…Saturn, yes he'll fix the hurt. Make the scary go away. Fingers carded through his hair, scratching at his scalp in a way that melted his body against the other's.
He sobbed into the bigger's chest, clinging so tightly like if he let go, Saturn would be ripped from his arms, never to be seen again. Alone. Forever–Uranus choked on another cry, burying his face deeper into the golden robes and blocking out everything. It was far too overwhelming. Scary. Horrifying.
But Saturn was safe.
It's okay.
His shaky, uneven breaths steadied, wails quieting in Saturn's loving embrace. It's okay. His eyes ached, the sudden fear that had taken him by surprise petering out. Saturn really does make everything better…
Although, slight confusion rippled through his mind as he breathed in Saturn's wonderful scent…like there was something he was forgetting. Something important–something that he had to do. The feeling buzzed beneath his skin, igniting a sense of urgency and wrongness in his core.
And so, even if it hurt, he pulled away.
Surprisingly (for…some reason. Bloody hell there's a lot of weirdly strange bewilderment going on) Saturn let him, arms dropping away as Uranus pushed back. He…he wasn't fighting it? He wasn't trying to keep Uranus in his arms for as long as possible? Stars, he remembered Saturn being much more clingy than this.
Uranus sniffed, roughly rubbing his teary eyes with the back of his hand, ducking away from the confused but overwhelmingly loving gaze patiently staring at him. The stars beneath him shone perfectly in the night, and yet Uranus couldn't help but glare at them angrily. Why? Why did this feel so wrong? Why did he have this–this urge screaming at him to do something…
And why did it scare him so much?
"Hey…" gentle hands took his when they balled into fists, knuckles turning a pained white with his nails digging into his palm. No…no it was too nice. Too soft–too caring. He was fine. Nothing was happening. He was just overreacting because of a stupid dream. It's okay. It's okay. Obviously, it was all okay. He was just being silly again.
Thumbs rubbed back and forth, the soothing pressure on his hands sending a shiver up his back, wings fluttering happily in response, "What's wrong?
Uranus opened his mouth, ready to unleash the whirlpool of fears…
Only he didn't know what to say.
What–what was wrong? He sure still felt wrong, and there was something going on alright, but…but he couldn't put words to it. No! It was just on the tip of his tongue! It was right there! It was just hiding, out of reach for words to describe, but he could still sense it.
There was something important. It was big and scary and caused so much hurt–danger. Danger? Was someone in danger? Why couldn't he remember? Ugh! The intense fear was already fading, taking the images that had flashed through his mind away with it.
Uranus screwed his face together, scrunching his eyebrows together and tilting his head (ignoring the little giggle and "aww!" that came from Saturn), "I–I can't remember…"
It hurt to admit it, like he was betraying someone in doing so, but it was true.
He didn't know.
"That's okay!" The quick reply came, a hand coming up to cup his cheek, slipping under his chin to tilt his head higher. Uranus didn't fight it (the love felt so nice. A softness that brought nostalgia to his mind and reminded him of simpler times), his eyes fluttering closed with a small, content purr as he soaked in the touch.
He never wanted this moment to end. It was so…so calming and nice and warmed his core with happy energy. Nothing could hurt him and everything was possible. His wings twitched behind him, tickling his neck and cheeks as they stretched with delighted shivers.
Uranus cracked open his eyes, blinking slowly and breaking into a sleepy yawn, a smile still tugging on his lips. Stars, he was so tired all of a sudden. Like he'd just ran a marathon across the entire Solar System, exhaustion dragging behind him like deadweight.
"Aww…looks like someone's tired."
"Mhm," Uranus slurred, rubbing away at the fatigue sinking into his eyes. A nap sounded really nice right about now…in fact he could just fall asleep right here. Yeah–yeah why not? He didn't have anything important to do, and Saturn would keep him safe. Saturn's arms were nice and comfy too, wrapping around him with a light, wonderful chuckle.
His warmth lulled Uranus into sleep, gently rocking the smaller one back and forth in his arms, "Rest, my fledgling. You're not going anywhere."
And for some reason, that last part sounded more like a threat than a comforting promise.
……
"–tune back! Saturn–"
"...am! I'm trying but–but something's wrong–"
"Wrong–but what–"
"I–I don't know it's–"
"–thing! We–we have to–"
"Jupi–Jupi they're slipping away. Stars–no no no I can't feel them–"
"NO!!!"
……
When Uranus woke up again, it was to quiet humming.
The fatigue that had previously plagued him vanished the moment he cracked open his eyes. It was like it wasn't even there to begin with! All remnants of sleepiness disappeared–even the tired ache in his eyes as he blinked them open. It was…stars this was amazing! Excited, buzzing energy pulsed beneath his surface, fingers itching to move and do something.
He–he should paint! He hasn't done that in a while, and wow does he have so many ideas! He could do anything he put his mind to–he wanted to do everything all at once. Nothing was impossible for him! Excitement thrummed in his mind, a loose grin stretching across his face.
The low humming faded away, and brilliant golden eyes came into focus as Saturn glanced down at the little planet in his lap, "Ooh you're awake! Did you sleep well?"
Uranus nodded with a widening smile, balling his gravity behind him and hoisting himself to his feet with a slight stumble. Saturn's gravity steadied him, but Uranus barely paid attention to that as he bounced on his heels. Paint paint paint paint. He needs to paint. He needs to do something with this sudden rush of energy. What to do…what to do…
He whipped around, ready to ask Saturn what he thought Uranus should paint–
Only to freeze in sudden confusion.
There was–didn't he–huh?
Where were Saturn's rings?!
Uranus blinked, rubbing his eyes in bewilderment, but Saturn's perfect form stayed the same. Wavy, shoulder-length hair–shoulder length? But wasn't it longer before? So, so much longer, cascading down his back like a golden waterfall–caught the sunlight, glowing in a brilliant glow. But…but the glow was always brighter than that. Brighter, because of the chunks of ice making his radiant rings shine.
Uranus ran a hand through his own hair, waving his hand above his head where he, too, would've had rings.
But…but there was nothing. For either of them. Saturn's beautiful halo, belonging to the most beautiful planet in the Solar System, had completely vanished. Uranus'…less nice rings, something he barely even had much of before, were also missing from its place above his head.
Uranus gawked, his mouth open in a big o as Saturn just sat there. Did…did he not care about his rings? Like, for Uranus it was never something special. Just another reason why he wasn't perfect, so he didn't care much about their mysterious disappearance –but they were so important to Saturn, no way he was so calm! He should be screeching and panicking about them being missing, not sitting there all perfect and flawless (other than not having rings) as he just mirrored Uranus' confusion.
"Mate, where–where are your rings?!" Uranus spluttered, jabbing a finger above the other's head where they should be floating, "You had rings! You definitely had rings!"
"Rings?" Saturn parroted, eyebrows furrowing as his head cocked to the side, unrecognition filling his eyes, "Hmm…no no, I'm sure I would remember having something like that. Are you sure you didn't dream it?" No. No, it wasn't a dream. He did have rings–Uranus was sure of it! With every atom in his being, he swore on his core that they'd existed and Saturn had the biggest ones imaginable.
It brought along powerful ways of envy and self-hatred that it had to be true.
Uranus shook his head, the disbelief starting to scare him, "But…but–"
Saturn smiled, his eyes crinkling in all the wrong ways, "You've always had such an active imagination–right Jupiter?"
"Oh, yes indeed."
"Bloody hell!" Uranus yelped, core jumping to his throat, hammering in his ears as he whipped around in panicked surprise. "J-Jupiter?! Since when did you get here?"
Jupiter chuckled, the rumble in his chest rolling like thunder, his short, pink curls falling into his eyes, "I've been here for a while, Uranus. Is that such a surprise?"
No. No it wasn't a surprise because of course Jupiter would be here. Wherever Saturn went, Jupiter was bound to follow. They were inseparable, two peas in a pod, soulmates tied to one another through their undying love–that wasn't the surprising part.
What threw Uranus off, was the fact that he didn't feel Jupiter's immense gravity anywhere. Well, now of course he felt the low pulsating force, but not before. It had literally appeared out of nowhere, surprising Uranus so hard his core still pounded loudly in his chest. There was no way Jupiter was that sneaky–he was big and clumsy and had the most powerful gravity out of all of them!
Only one of them had the innate ability to hide their gravity, and that was–
"Neptune!"
Uranus had half the mind to brace for impact, and yet still he was swept off his feet as Neptune tackled him in a giant, crushing hug. Oof–bloody hell was he wilder than he remembered. Untamed, blue curls blocked out his vision, tickling his face and hinting at a sneeze. The hug consumed both of them, their bodies melting together like they were one, joint being.
Oh–oh wow okay. This is nice.
Neptune's tail whapped against his legs–an old happy stim that Uranus recognized with a smile–giggling with a full-body shiver. Yes. Yes this is perfect. This is normal. The tension left his body, the annoying, scary confusion fading from his mind as Uranus just leaned further into the embrace, burying his head into the fluff of Neptune's jacket and just breathing in his tell-tale scent (was it always that salty?). His wings fluttered behind him, arching over his shoulders like they too wanted to join in on the cuddle pile.
Neptune tightened his hold, squeezing harder, and despite the love circling through his mind, and how much he enjoyed the cuddle, Uranus couldn't quite breathe.
"N-Neptune," Uranus gasped with a wince, his ribs complaining with a sharp ache, "Mate–ow. I can't breathe."
The hold lessened, Neptune apologizing quickly, and the pain just…went away.
Just like that, it was gone. He–wait no, wasn't it supposed to linger? Wasn't it supposed to stay as a low, pounding throb that never went away? That's how it always went. Something mildly painful triggered a flare of the forever-ache, and then he was forced to wait it out until he could think again.
A new wave of confusion crashed over him, but this time it was backed by building excitement. He missed the confused glances of the others, his breaths picking up as overwhelming hope panged in his core. Stars above, please. Please don't come back. Every passing moment Uranus waited for the wave of crushing pain, searching for the ache within himself–his bones, joints, core, arms, legs.
But it didn't come. No matter how deep within himself he looked, the agonizing pain that had haunted him for so long…wasn't there. Like it was snapped out of existence just like Saturn's rings.
Uranus' breaths stuttered, his eyes shining with hopeful, happy tears. Did he–stars above–is it gone? For real? Like, like actually this time and not a cruel joke that the universe pulls where it comes back at the worst moment possible?
Is…is he finally free?
His wings–wings. Wings! Sudden realization flashed through his mind, the bubble of hope growing and expanding in his chest. If–if he doesn't have his chronic pain that means the collision never happened and…
And he can still fly.
The raw excitement almost choked him, but he managed to push it down. Just barely, but enough for him to focus, calming down his wild, jumping for joy core-beat. He knew he was ignoring Jupiter, Saturn, and Neptune (and he was sorry for that) but he literally could not think about anything else at the moment.
Everything narrowed to the innocent, hopeful bubble of anticipation swelling in his core, filling him up with happy, fluttering warmth. Please. Please let it be true. Please please please, bloody hell he's never wanted anything more than this in his entire life.
Uranus took a deep, shaky breath, in through his nose and out through his mouth, clearing his mind to focus only on the feathery weight attached to his back.
And, with a strong, sharp flap of his wings, he took off into the sky.
Saturn's surprised yelp was lost to the sounds of wind whipping in his ears, running through Uranus' hair as he twirled into the sky. Whoohoo!!! This is awesome!!! He shrieked, ducking and diving, every flap of his wings carrying him faster. Wind flew through the white feathers, and Uranus threw out his arms, giggling in whoops of excited cheer, "I can fly!!!"
He dove down, whipping by the blurry forms of the others and grinning wildly as he shouted back into the sky, "Saturn–Saturn look! I'm doing it! I'm flying!"
He slowed only to hear the cheers beneath him, the loud thwoop thwoop thwoop of his wings holding him in place igniting even more happiness in his core. His back muscles twinged, flexing with power and control as his wings just kept flapping.
Stars–this is incredible! He missed this so, so much. The natural feeling, like he was finally at home in the sky–the one thing he was missing all these years–grew brighter with every second he spent flying. This was a part of him. This was who he was.
"Uranus!" Neptune's high-pitched, giggly voice called for him, the sing-song tone catching his attention with a flutter of his bursting-with-happiness core. Uranus glanced beneath him, looking through his dangling legs to the planet quickly speeding towards his companion, trident in hand and tail whipping back and forth to gather momentum. Ooh–the tug of gravity pulled him down, Neptune easily closing the distance between them with a bubbly laugh, his eyes sparkling with shared joy, "Wowie, you're fast!"
Uranus nodded, glancing below to where the tiny figures of Jupiter and Saturn craned their necks to look up at them. The overwhelming happiness took his breath away (and the exertion required to keep himself up), sweat beading on his face as his breaths came out in quick pants, "Yeah–yeah mate! 'Cause I can fly!"
Stars, even just saying that sent a joyful shiver down his spine, legs kicking out with the happy stims just ready to burst free. And…and he let it. He let himself be wild and uncaring, the innocent, youthful spirit sparking in his core. See, nothing could ever tamper down his flame!
Neptune grinned, spinning his trident in his hand, his eyes quickly glancing away, and then snapping back to Uranus with an obvious idea forming in his eyes, "Do you wanna race?"
"YES!!!" Uranus squealed, loud and sharp but he couldn't care less about being judged when he was so bloody happy! He could race because he could fly!!! And he could fly because he didn't have any chronic pain!!! He wasn't sure why it was such an amazing relief, but he felt incredible so he wasn't complaining!
Neptune suddenly took off without warning, leaving Uranus squawking indignantly as he scrambled after the other Ice Giant, "Hey! Not fair–I wasn't ready!"
Neptune just giggled, yelling over his shoulder, "Last one to Jupiter's orbit is a rotten comet!"
Uranus would not be relegated to a bloody rotten comet, so he darted forward with heavy flaps of his wings, chasing after the other with shrieks of their shared laughter.
"I won!"
"No! Obviously I was the first to cross! Are you blind, mate?"
A confused expression flashed across Neptune's face, his big blue eyes blinking rapidly, "...No? I can see perfectly fine."
Ugh bloody hell. Uranus sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose with an annoyed huff (but he wasn't really mad. Just a bit of friendly rivalry caused by competition, that's all), "Mate that's not–ugh nevermind." He rolled his eyes, but the remnants of the giddy smile plastered across his face betrayed his happiness. Nothing could ruin this moment, and Neptune was always like this, it wasn't something to get caught up over.
Especially not with Uranus being able to fly!!!
He still couldn't believe it. Every happy flutter of his wings sent his core soaring, and the small twinges in his back felt so bloody awesome. It wasn't like the devastating suffering of the chronic pain he was so convinced he'd had, no no this pain felt good. It meant he was moving and pushing his body in ways that he could finally do! It meant he wasn't a useless pile of space garbage and was happy and free!
The satisfaction of feeling the wonderful, sore ache blossoming around his back, and the breathless pants mixed with the light sheen of sweat, was the most incredible feeling ever. Who needs to sniff comets when he has the incredible adrenaline rush of swooping up and down, twirling into the sky with whoops and hollers of joy.
He was in heaven.
This was all he ever wanted–all he ever needed! Bloody hell, he could be told the worst news imaginable and it still wouldn't tamper his joy. Nothing else could ever match the all-encompassing euphoria blooming inside him. Nothing could ever top this, he was at the peak of life and enjoying every second of it.
Uranus shifted, jumping from one foot to the other because he still had energy–and could still move! There was literally nothing stopping him from stopping. The possibilities were endless and he wanted to do everything, his glee backed by the exhilaration of being alive. He was actually living life, taking control when the reigns were finally handed back to him.
His wings twitched behind him, yearning to reclaim the skies once more. Something he could do with the freedom his working, healthy body lended him! Right on cue, the joyous shiver ran up his back, Uranus chirping a happy sing-song note as he bounced on his heels.
Stars above please never let this end.
"Oki doki Uranus!" Neptune twirled into view, using his tail to make it look like he was swimming through space (something he obviously found hilarious with the goofy grin he wore), "Now where do you wanna go?"
Uranus hesitated, glancing over his shoulder and squinting into the darker orbits from which they'd come, "Wait, mate shouldn't we wait until Jupiter and Saturn get back? We outran them by quite a bit." He would feel much safer if they were here. Just in case anything went wrong. Plus, he wanted them to see all the cool tricks he'd learned while racing over here!
The other Ice Giant's face filled his vision, grinning his toothy smile and tapping Uranus lightly on the nose. Unsurprised by Neptune's silly antics, Uranus didn't push him away (because he enjoyed the company and, despite how good he felt, the thought of being alone terrified him), he just let Neptune do his thing because it wasn't hurting anyone! Maybe it was a tad bit annoying, but the affection filling his core outweighed every other icky feeling.
Neptune giggled, shaking his head with soft laughter, the sound prompting Uranus to do the same, "Silly Uranus–they beat us here! Didn't you see them talking to the Sun?"
"Wha–no?" Uranus spluttered, disbelief swirling through his mind. How did that make any sense! How did they go faster than Uranus and Neptune? How did he not see them passing? No way. There was no way–they didn't even have any wings or tails! Uranus and Neptune did, and they had the extra advantage with the boosts it gave them.
Hmm…there was definitely something weird going on…
First the absence of Saturn's rings (which Uranus was still extremely confused over because he wholeheartedly remembered Saturn having them–as well as having some himself! They were the source of the majority of his insecurity…but apparently that was all something he dreamt up? Hmm, nope, unlikely), then, even if it was incredible, being so surprised when he could function like a normal person and fly–and now this? The biggest planets somehow slipping under his nose every single time they're out of his eyesight?
Weird…incredibly weird and strange.
Uranus shook his head, resetting his thoughts as the suspicion grew in his mind like a parasite. Something fishy was going on, and it wasn't Neptune. He had to get to the bottom of this, the cycle of questions weren't going to leave him alone until he found out what was happening and why it was so weird.
He kicked off, using his gravity to slingshot him into the sky and above the Asteroid Belt. Below him, Neptune's gravity rippled in surprise (at least something stayed the same), expanding as he followed the other Ice Giant who rose higher above him.
Sun would know what to do.
Sun was their protector–if anything was wrong with the system, he would know first. He would be the one to fix it and make everything okay again. And, like, Uranus wasn't too worried about everything that was slightly wrong, it was just getting bloody annoying.
He wasn't going insane. He knew he was right. He had to be! Everything he remembered–everything he felt–was so deeply connected to parts of him, raw and genuine feelings so real it couldn't have been something he made up.
Safe to say, Uranus was incredibly confused.
Bloody hell wait…he took a step (more like a flap) back, doubt suddenly filling his thoughts…what if he's just overthinking this? What if he's connecting dots that aren't there, making this a much bigger deal than it needed to be. He's always been a rather anxious planet, thoughts racing and core clenching tight–maybe this was just Uranus misremembering and making a big deal out of nothing.
…even still, asking his star about it wouldn't hurt anyone.
Just as the ghost of touch brushed over his shoulder, a quiet and confused, "...Uranus?" coming from the planet behind him, Uranus broke into flight once more. His mighty wings spread wide, catching the air and carrying him up and over the Asteroid Belt. It was hotter on this side of the belt, the waves of heat rolling over him as he stumbled, but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle. It did however, ignite a weird, somewhat fearful feeling in the back of his mind, left-over from…from something bad happening.
Just like always, he didn't know what, only understanding the fleeting, split-second emotions that faded as fast as they'd appeared.
Uranus blinked away the silly paranoia, starting back forward with one mission on his mind: ask Sun what the heck was going on.
He needed answers and needed them now.
Ignoring the way his hands trembled, Uranus lifted his head higher and–ouch it is bright bloody hell. It–it would make sense, that closer to the star would be brighter, but wow did he forget how brilliant the shine would be. With a grimace, he squinted past the sharp glare (ugh he can't see anything! It's giving him a big headache…both literally and figuratively), his vision clearing enough for the forms of Jupiter and Saturn to come into focus, with Sun's wild smile catching his attention.
Sun grinned, throwing out his arms in a wide, welcoming gesture, bright flames crackling loudly as the light increased for a moment, "Uranus! Just the planet I wanted to see!"
Why…why does the star want to see him? What did Jupiter and Saturn say to him? Did they say something bad? Is he in trouble? Slightly terrified thoughts circled throughout his mind, anxiety creeping up the back of his throat as his hands grew clammy.
Did Jupiter and Saturn tell Sun about the ring thing? Did–did Sun think Uranus was the crazy one now? No, no he wasn't crazy! He just got a little confused! Saturn was right, it was probably just a dream! (It didn't feel like a dream. He believed with his entire core that they had rings.) Uranus swallowed past the lump in his throat, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, shrinking under the star's intense gaze, "Uh…hi Sun."
Sun tilted his head, sharp, yellow prying eyes sparkling with mischief, "Hmm…why so blue, Uranus?"
"I–" Sun's booming laughs cut through whatever Uranus was about to say, the planet incredibly confused until the joke actually registered in his mind. Why so blue…wow haha so funny. He's an Ice Giant. He's blue. But he's also scared and confused and that came across as being sad–something Sun immediately picked up on to make that joke.
Uranus sighed, running a hand through his hair as he waited for Sun's cackling to die down. Ugh…so annoying. Sure, it was nice sometimes, but this time it wasn't even a good joke! It was just wordplay! Anyone could do that, and it certainly didn't warrant this long of crazed giggles.
It was times like these where Uranus was glad he orbited so far out.
Bloody hell, he couldn't imagine what it was like to constantly be close to the star, like Jupiter or the rocky planets (were there rocky planets right now? There should be, right? It couldn't just be the four of them and Sun…), who were forever forced to be in proximity with him.
Sun's maniac giggles came to a stop, the star wiping away a tear, still wearing that giant, unwavering grin as he stared down at the little planet, "So, Uranus, I take it you wanted to talk to me?"
"I…uhm," Uranus glanced to the sunlit figures of Jupiter and Saturn, the fear of the unknown returning. He still had no idea what they said. It couldn't be anything bad–right? Because if it was something bad, then Sun wouldn't be so happy…although he's always like this. Ugh! Why is this so bloody hard! Just talk you dimwit!
The gravity around him pulsed with terrifying strength, the overwhelming power wrapping around Uranus and snapping his eyes back to Sun. The star stared at him, brilliantly bright eyes boring into his skull with questions sparking in the flickering shadows of flames.
Nobody moved.
The silence pressed in on all sides–judging him–every second spent quiet was an accusation. A threat, a pitiful smile that just destroyed any hope he had of getting them on his side.
Uranus couldn't take it anymore.
"Something's wrong!" He shouted, shattering the silence with his sudden cry. He needed sound, the quiet was too much. Too much but too little at the same time. Never enough. Failure. Breaths heaving, his shoulders shook, getting more and more flustered as he continued ranting, "There's–there's something going on but I don't know what and it's scaring me Sun."
He raised his eyes, jabbing a shaky finger at Saturn, his voice trembling far too much for his liking, "I–I swore Saturn had rings, and I did too! And…and I couldn't fly because I had my wonky tilt from the collision and all that, but like it didn't happen? But I really thought it did–and then gravity keeps on acting weird too!"
He took a second to catch his breath, core twisting with the sudden onset of anxiety, the pressure increasing behind his eyes as he blinked away the terrified tears. Breathe. Breathe, Uranus, you can do this. Come on. You can do it!
He sucked in a shaky inhale, breathing out in a sound that was more like a pained wheeze than anything else, "Sun…Sun mate please you gotta take my word for this. Jupiter and Saturn and Neptune might not notice it–but I do! And you're the Sun! You deal with these kinds of things all the time! So–so can't you just deal with this?!"
He bloody hated how weak and pathetic he most obviously sounded, and now he was basically just begging…oh how far he's fallen. But he had to make the Sun see what Uranus sees! Something's wrong, and the only one who had the power to fix it was the star himself. Sun fixes everything that's wrong, so can't he just fix this?
Please. Please make the scary go away.
Uranus stared, watching as hesitation flashed across Sun's blindingly bright eyes, confusion tightly knitting his brows. Jupiter and Saturn were much the same, pitying gazes striking through his core like lightning. No! He didn't need their pity! He didn't need anyone's pity, all he needed was someone to believe him. Take his word and help please!
Neptune (who'd appeared next to Sun and the others–seriously?! Why was nobody questioning this! It happened right again in front of their eyes and nobody blinked an eye!) shook his head, looking at him with a mix of confusion, annoyance, and a sorrowful pout.
"Uranus I–" Sun scratched the back of his head, expression melting into something softer. Something that offered sympathy and compassion but not understanding! All Uranus needed was someone who understood him.
But he couldn't even get that.
"You don't believe me…" Uranus whispered, dropping his eyes down to the stars to hide the budding tears. The weak, tiny thread of remaining hope snapped, desperation slamming back into him. No…no he was so close. He could feel it–there was something Wrong and nobody cared! He wasn't crazy! They–they just didn't understand. They couldn't see it like he could.
"Uranus…" Jupiter's big shadow passed over him, and Uranus didn't have it in him to lift his head and meet the pity and dismissal in his eyes. Instead, he set his jaw, glaring at the twinkling stars to ignore the burning growing behind his eyes. It didn't matter. Who cares about what they thought, he could do this all by himself! If they didn't believe him, that was their problem–Uranus would solve it alone and prove them all wrong!
Saturn's soft gravity–with something off about it. There's always something off. Too weak, non-existent, glitching in ways it would never normally do–reached towards him like a hug.
But Uranus was not falling for it.
It was a trap. Something to distract him from the glitches in the space-time continuum. Offering affection to get Uranus to abandon his mission. Redirecting his attention so he would just forget about the incredibly suspicious stuff happening around him.
Uranus balled his fists, frustration rising in his core to replace the hopeless despair. It lit the determined spark, exploding into anger backed by desperation. He'll show them. He'll show them all! Something weird was going on and he was not going to just sit back and let it happen.
He pushed back against the comforting gravity, slapping away Saturn's outreaching hand offering blind obedience. The pained cry of the planet that was supposed to be ringed went ignored by the smaller one. The back of his hand stung, but it didn't match the lonely ache swirling in his core.
That wasn't Saturn.
Or Jupiter, or Neptune, or Sun–Uranus knew the real celestials, and how they were supposed to act, and this wasn't it. These…bloody hell these were imposters, fakes that were there to keep him docile!
They didn't believe him, so the expectation was that he was going to drop it. Turn a blind eye towards all the wrong things and just stay in this supposedly perfect world where he had everything he ever wanted.
Well, jokes on them.
Because Uranus is not going down without a fight.
He's–stars, he's not going to physically fight them! Bloody hell, that would go south so fast. Uranus barely knew how to properly defend himself, let alone attack, and it was three (plus a bloody star!) against one. He's lost before it even began.
And…and Uranus couldn't bring it to himself to attack his friends–his family. Even if they weren't the real versions, they still wore the faces of the ones he loved most. They still moved and loved and talked like their real counterparts, so no matter how fake these buggers were, it still felt real for Uranus.
So, instead he targeted all the anger and frustration and desperation at the universe, his grievance lying with whatever higher thing was puppeting the others to keep him trapped here. Jupiter and Saturn and Neptune and Sun–they were all just victims of the power of the mysterious force. Uranus didn't blame them, it was just how the stars aligned for this thing to manipulate him.
(A part of him still resisted the fact that this wasn't real. A part of him still hung onto the dying hope that the wonders given to him by this perfect world were true.
He didn't want to leave behind the love and the potential that this is how things went. No separation, no loneliness, no pain. In a universe where the collision never happened and he could fly! Why would we want to leave this behind? It was incredible! So much better than whatever hell-hole he'd climbed out of.
Uranus hated himself for still being conflicted over this.)
Ignoring the calls and the pulses of gravity in front of him–all of which were fake. Not-true. Don't believe a word they say. It's all a lie–Uranus turned and stalked away.
The others let him go.
And Uranus flapped his wings, flying off before they could see the tears slipping down his cheeks.
A frustrated sound ripped through his throat, Uranus angrily scribbling over yet another failed attempt of drawing Saturn's rings.
He was trying! He was really trying, digging deep into the recesses of his mind where the tendrils of whatever real world he remembered lie. He could see it–the image of the brilliant halo hovering above Saturn's brilliant hair and lighting up his brilliant golden eyes was so clear in his mind.
And yet as soon as he tried to put it down on paper, it disappeared.
Uranus glared at the messy sketches in his sketchbook with fiery daggers, resisting the urge to rip the page out and tear it to a million bloody pieces. Every drawing was just wrong, it didn't capture how he saw it in his mind. Too big, too thin, too thick, too much, too little, never enough. Pencil smudges littered the page, dark, angry scratched out lines covering much of the attempts.
Ugh! Stars above, he was this close from lashing out. Every tiny thing just pushed him closer and closer from falling over the edge, and as much as he would've loved to just crash out and scream at the closest person, he needed to do this. He couldn't rest, couldn't give up now when he could feel just how close he was to figuring this out.
He didn't quite know the process in which to do so, but he was just taking it one step at a time. Even if they were itty bitty baby steps, it was better than doing nothing.
It was better than failing.
…although he wasn't doing much better than that at the moment either.
Stupid brain gatekeeping information–it makes no sense! He knows he knows this, the details are right there, every time he closes his eyes he can see the blurred shine of the rings, but no he can't actually remember it enough to get it down on paper so he can get actual evidence and prove (at least to himself) that he isn't crazy because his dimwit brain won't tell him what he already knows!
Bloody hell this is exhausting.
Stars, a nap sounded really nice right about now.
The weight of everything is just…so much and he just needs a rest. Time to block out everything and ignore the stress and sadness and scary and ew and just feel nothing. Let his brain and body take some time to recharge and come back even stronger.
Sleeping was an amazing idea, or that's at least what the whispering voices in his mind said. Sleep. Sleep at it'll all be okay. Sleep, so you can't fight back. Sleep so you're weak and vulnerable. Sleep makes everything better!
Sleep...
The pencil tangled within his grasp slipped from his fingers, the sudden heaviness of his eyelids weighing them down. Fatigue ached in his bones, the heavy weight of his wings drooping tiredly on his back. He just needed a break. That's all. Just–just let him close his eyes for a moment…
Uranus was asleep before his head hit the sketchbook pages.
…………
"...appening?! WHAT'S HAPPE–"
"No…no no NO NO NO STAY WITH ME!! NEPTUNE URA–"
"Saturn no–what's–"
"NO NO PLEASE! I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry–I can't feel them. It's empty–"
"WAIT! CHARON AND I–"
"You–them…!?"
"Stars please, you're our only hope…"
………
Uranus blinked awake, a pool of drool staining the pages crumpled underneath his cheek.
Ugh, was his first thought, sleepiness fading from his mind the longer his eyes stayed open, his face still smushed against the papers (what? It was actually kinda comfortable!). Wow. Just wow. He bloody fell asleep! In the blink of an eye, he lost so much precious time that could've been used for something productive! He could've gotten at least some progress, but nope. Just sleep. Frustration bubbled back up in his core, and Uranus gritted his teeth, grumbling a low string of mutters that would've made the real Saturn livid.
Bloody hell, it was like the universe was doing everything it could to slow him down.
Well screw you too universe.
With a grunt, Uranus heaved himself back up to a sitting position, his neck aching from the weird position he'd fallen asleep in. Great. That's just bloody great. He huffed out a heavy sigh, the sharp breath whistling through his clenched teeth as he ran a hand through his disheveled mess of hair. Eugh, stars he really should redo the braid soon–
No. No getting distracted. He had to figure out a way to get out of this fake world, and do it now. He's already taken too long as is. No going on silly, random side-quests, no random tangents that didn't matter, he had to sit down and focus with all his being.
Uranus shifted into a more comfortable sitting position, gripping the edges of the paper so hard his knuckles turned white. The messy, pathetic attempts at capturing Saturn's beauty–Saturn's rings' beauty–danced across his vision, taunting him with the complete failure it'd come out as.
Come on. Come on, brain, please give him something to work with. Just be normal and not weird for once–that's all he asks. Just do this one thing, and then they would be home free–
"Ooh, whatcha drawing Uranus?"
"GAH!" Uranus flinched, jumping out of his atmosphere, a loud yelp exploding into the silence of his orbit. He whirled around, feathers fluffed up to the max, spooked wings shooting outwards in an attempt to scare off the threat.
Which…which was just Neptune. Standing there, a step back from where he'd been hovering over Uranus' shoulder, his head tilted to the side with a look of pure innocence like he didn't just scare the living daylights out of Uranus. Bloody hell of course. At least the fake got the appearing-out-of-nowhere shtick pretty much down.
Uranus sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose and clenching his shirt with the other, willing the hammering core (which he could feel pounding through his surface and atmosphere) to settle down, "Neptune, mate, bloody hell don't do that!"
"Sorry!" Neptune grinned, smile unwavering and blinking frog-eyed in a way that sent nostalgia tugging on Uranus' core-strings. He…he loved it when Neptune did that. He loved the playful, light-heartedness of the action, the pure innocence and relaxation of the double blink. It reminded him of the simpler times, when they were still happy and nothing bad had happened
It felt so real.
But it wasn't, Uranus reminded himself with a bitter glare, it wasn't real. This Neptune wasn't the actual one. They were so good at copying the exact mannerisms, but it was all a bloody trick. Yeah, yeah he saw through the performance. It was easy enough when you actually started paying attention.
Small things were just off enough to be noticeable. Like how the blinks happened too quickly, moving too robotically like it was just following orders.
With a shake of his head, Uranus dropped his eyes back down to his sketchbook, twirling the pencil in his fingers. As long as he ignored them, it would hurt less. As long as he ignored them, he couldn't get distracted. Especially now, when Uranus was so close, but there was just something missing.
There was always something missing.
Uranus buried his face deeper into the sketchbook, drawing random circles so it looked like he was busy, pointedly avoiding eye contact with the Neptune still floating in front of him, "Mate, I–I'm busy at the moment. Can you go? Please?"
Neptune pouted, voice rising to an infuriating whine, "But I wanted to see what you were drawing." He stretched the last word out, and Uranus just barely strangled back the urge to chuck the sketchbook at his head. It would've been so satisfying, but that was a distraction. And he couldn't get distracted. Not now.
Neptune twirled one of the blue curls in the giant mop of hair on his head, a wistful look entering his eyes, "You've always had such an active imagination–right Saturn?"
Uranus wasn't even surprised this time when Saturn's voice came from behind him, agreeing with Neptune and pulling Jupiter along with him. Wow…so they're reusing dialogue now? He's already gone through this in the beginning, the roles barely changed for this time.
If whatever…whatever thing created this world to keep Uranus from fighting back, at least make it more interesting! Like, bloody hell, maybe try a little bit harder before reusing the same idea. It was like they weren't even trying to hide the fake-ness now, which at least made it a little easier for Uranus to confirm that he wasn't the crazy one.
He was a sane planet in an insane pocket dimension–or whatever this place was!
They didn't deserve his attention, so Uranus blocked out the sounds of their voices, his tired eyes straying to the empty space above Saturn's head.
Still no rings…
Uranus rubbed his eyes, letting out what felt like his thousandth sigh since he first woke up with Saturn. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh! Do you think if he complained for long enough, whatever force that was behind all this would give up and let him go?
Mmm…one could hope.
And Uranus needed all the hope he could get right now.
"Okay guys–" Uranus cut through whatever spiel Jupiter was going on, snapping his sketchbook closed and standing up with a stretch. If the universe couldn't be bothered enough to give him a good fake versions of his friends, then he wasn't bothered enough to deal with them. Fair trade, if Uranus said so himself. The anxious thrum in the back of his mind picked up, reminding him with frantic whispers that he was wasting precious time.
He can do this.
Uranus raised his head, meeting the eyes of the three not-planets floating in a line in front of him. They all stared at him with equally expectant gazes, backs towards the Sun so the dim sunlight that made it out here cast shadows over their faces. Uranus rubbed his shaky hands together–fidgeting with them because wow did it suddenly become super spooky–swallowing past the rock lodged in his throat, "I–uhm, you're all like very distracting mates, and I'm trying to draw here so it would be great if you could just–"
"URANUS!!!"
"Ugh! What now?!" Uranus spun around, throwing his arms out in wild frustration. Seriously?! Could he not have one moment of peace without getting interrupted? What was so bloody important that he couldn't even finish his sentence–nothing! Nothing was that important so could everyone just leave him alone please.
Uranus glared in the direction the yell came from, so ready to chew off the head of whoever was screaming like it was the end of the stars-damned universe. Just go away! He doesn't need any more bloody doppelgangers distracting him. He just needs to focus and get out of here!
Who would it be now? Who would the universe choose to torture him with next? A moon? Another planet? Which face would it take on, which celestial that he loved so much would Uranus be forced to confront this time? Show him! Just get it over with now!
Rip the band-aid off while he still had control.
Despair turned to anger, boiling in his core like a hot ocean. He hated this. He hated this so much. Why was it him that was chosen to be tortured? Couldn't it have been literally anyone else?! Uranus wasn't smart enough to get out of here. He was just another average bloke, there was nothing special about him.
"What do you want?" Uranus shouted into the darkness, voice catching in his throat as his breaths hitched. No. No he was not going to cry. Not here. Not when showing an ounce of weakness meant giving in.
He was angry, desperate, lonely, sure, but hoo boy he wasn't giving up now.
"You need to come back!!!" The voice shrieked once more, this time closer and yet he still couldn't see anyone. What, could this one turn invisible now? What's next, reanimating the dead?
That was a…strangely specific example.
Whatever. It didn't matter. He could ignore it just like he ignored the others behind him. Uranus glanced over his shoulder, just to make sure Neptune, Jupiter, and Saturn were all actually still there (gravity loved to lie recently), all three pairs of eyes snapping to him in unison.
Well that's certainly not creepy at all.
Uranus shuddered, the hairs on the back of his neck rising as the unblinking, empty gazes bore into his skull. As quick as a comet, he turned back around, feeling the trio's eyes follow his every movement. Nope nope nope–that's a big fat nope for him. He does not want to stare into their soulless eyes, no thank you! Go away! Stop it!
Instead, he scanned the vast expanse of space unfolding in front of him, lumpy asteroids in the somewhat far off Kuiper Belt the only thing catching his attention. There was nothing exciting out here. That's why he hated it so much–that's why he hated being alone so much. It got boring. And lonely. And–
Wait wait wait–what's that?
Something he'd thought was only just a rather big Kuiper Belt object, caught the sunlight, illuminating the outline of…of someone heading towards them. It was so small Uranus barely noticed it! How could things that small even have sentience? Neptune was the smallest one out of all of them, but he was still ginormous compared to asteroids.
The cry popped up again, louder and more insistent, screaming his name again…and coming from the direction of the approaching celestial.
Uranus rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest with a huff. Wow, was their voice annoying. So high-pitched and nasally, but with a softer edge than any of the planets (and Sun) had. He sighed, letting out a long, exhausted exhale, only stopping when the annoying cries clenched his core tight, Uranus sending back a shout of his own, "Okay! Okay! Relax! Don't get your orbit in a twist, I'm over here mate!"
Stars, one would think with being a bloody Ice Giant–emphasis on the giant–he would be easy to find amongst the emptiness of space.
But apparently not!
"Uranus?" Saturn's voice came from behind him, a monotone edge to it that wasn't there before, "What's happening?"
"Quiet." Uranus held up a hand, straining to locate the voice. He planted his feet, not daring to turn around again because he knew if he did, the strange calling would cease to exist. The voice was something new–something different that he could follow. If he got distracted now, it would fade to nothing, and gone would be his chance at escape.
He…it was just another feeling telling him that.
He didn't know how to describe it, but he knew deep in his consciousness that this thing was important. A sense of peacefulness, a pull to his core that tugged in the direction of the tiny creature. Determination, and the sudden need to find them right here, right now, without wasting any more time, flooded his mind, leading him towards the Kuiper Belt.
The small outline grew bigger, and with it, the urges blossomed into something stronger.
The vague whispers grew louder, chanting in his mind–words he couldn't hear but knew were calling out to the other. Begging, pleading to find them no matter what it took. His eyes glazed over, automatic thoughts playing on repeat. He had to. He had to. He had to find them.
They had the answers he seeked.
And then Uranus was suddenly running.
He abandoned the other giants without a second thought, their sudden exclamations of varying levels of surprise quickly fading as Uranus put more and more distance between them. His lungs burned, wheezing breaths billowing out into foggy clouds with every stride he took. He–he had to get to it. Whatever it was, he was suddenly drawn to it. Nothing else mattered, this is what he needed to do. This is what his life was leading towards all along.
Gravity pulled on him from behind, the yells of the fakes picking up as they chased after him. They were trying to stop him. Keep him from succeeding but no! No he's not letting them win! He will get out of here and do whatever it takes to succeed!
Nothing will stop him now.
Uranus writhed, sending out a strong pulse of his gravity to throw off his pursuers. Hope fluttered back up in his core, the wonderful, shrill voice of the mysterious celestial like music to his ears. His legs burned with every step he took, wings boosting him closer to freedom.
He's so close. So, so very close to escaping and leaving all the weird and wrong behind and finally breaking free from the chains of this prison. He can feel it, a strong certainty settling over his mind.
This voice is his ticket out of here.
"Hey!!!" Uranus screeched, space all looking far too much the same to find the figure amongst it. He panted, wheezing through strained gasps for air as he wildly waved his arms, "I'm here! I–bloody hell why is space so big–where are you little mate?!" He whipped his head left, then right, then right in front of him, vision blurring together with the desperate tears pricking at the edges of his eyes.
Please. Please. Please…
"Uranus!!!"
Uranus whipped his head to the side, locked eyes with the tiny celestial–is that a moon? Wait wait wait he knows that moon. He knew–woah wait Charon?! What is she doing here? And if she's here, where's Pluto? How does he even know these people?!–and then missed a step, stumbling over his feet with a startled cry.
His momentum carried him further, losing control in a wild tumble, the stars blurring together into one giant, spinning mess that made him incredibly dizzy. Disoriented, the sudden, overwhelming fear returned, convinced he'd lost his chance. Stop! Stop, stop, stop! His wings flared, catching the air to yank him back to a painful halt.
Uranus grimaced, his neck and back sparking in pain from the jostled movement. Ow…you dimwit! Such an idiot move. Wait–Charon!!!
"Where–"
"URANUS!!!" Movement flashed in front of his eyes, and suddenly he was face-to-face with deep, purple eyes. They radiated otherworldliness, something about them screaming power. Maybe it was the dark sparkle, or the way that if he stared deep enough into them, he could see the wispy shadows of blurry figures.
Or, maybe it was the fact that Charon was real.
Uranus blinked, relieved excitement thrumming in his core as he broke into a smile–yes! Yes, yes, yes!!! He knew it–and Charon gasped. Her eyes lit up, thick, complicated emotions flashing across her face way too fast to read, but he caught onto the two most obvious ones: hope and fear.
Well that made two of them.
Charon smiled, a soft, gentle one haunted by death and fear, tears brimming in her dark eyes, "Stars–stars I can't believe I found you."
"Was it that hard?" Uranus asked, arching an eyebrow. It's just the Solar System, not that big–oh wait she meant coming from the outside world. The real world. The one where he also came from and was far from perfect but was still his. That world? If Charon came from it, did she know how to go back?
Did she know how to bring Uranus home?
Charon nodded, ducking her head to wipe the sweat off her brow with a heaving sigh. One that reeked of exhaustion and stress and grief…and gave Uranus a little clue as to what the state of the real world was when she'd left it. Was it really that bad? Did whatever thing trap him here also attack them? Did someone get hurt?!
Fear rose in his throat, hitching his breath as Charon raised her eyes back up to his, the determined spark shining bright. It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. Breathe, Uranus. Remember to breathe. He forced hot, sharp breaths in and out, watching Charon's gaze flick somewhere behind him, widening with fear, "Shoot, we have to go now! Follow me."
Uranus didn't question it, because every part of his being knew that this was the real version. The one that would lead him back to the others. The one that would save him. He didn't waste a bloody second, following right on her heels as Charon took off. He didn't have to look back to know what she saw, the tendrils of gravity reaching out from behind him more than enough to give him a picture.
The gravitational forces grabbed at anything they could find–his legs, head, wings, back–but Uranus pushed forward. He matched Charon's strides (how was she going faster than him?! Ugh, weird mechanics of this weird world), summoning his bow in one hand and an ice arrow in the other.
He notched the arrow, clenching his eyes shut as he spun around, pulling back on the arrow mid-spin.
And released it.
He didn't stop as a screech echoed into the night, barely wavered when the blood curdling scream sounded so much like Saturn it wrenched his core with overwhelming panic. He almost stopped and turned around–no. No he wasn't falling for their tricks! They were fake. They deserved this! He can't let his emotions get the better of him. He has to stay strong. He can't cry. No matter how hard it hurts, he can't fail now.
Uranus grit his teeth, pushing past the overwhelming storm of emotions threatening to rain down upon him, picking up speed. He had to do this. He had to get out of here. He's so close, he has Charon and she knows where to go to escape this hell.
Actually…
"Charon!" Uranus called out to the moon running in front of him, stringing another arrow when the false gravity tugged on him again, "Where are we going?!"
Charon glanced over her shoulder, purple energy–that was definitely not there before–wrapping around her body in dark, tangled wisps, sparking like lightning in her eyes, "It's just up here! We're so close, just hang in a little longer Ura!"
The nickname sent a happy shiver down his back–that was something real. Something the silly false-world couldn't replicate…which was something he was just now realizing. Nobody called him Ura or Uri or any of the other little nicknames he had. He was just plain old Uranus. The vanilla version that anyone could know. Nothing deeper than that.
An aggressive screech exploded behind him, and Uranus shot the nocked arrow, loading up another and ducking under an asteroid–asteroid?! Since when did they get to the Kuiper Belt?–dodging yet another one as they dived deeper into the belt. The darkness wrapped around him like a thick blanket, strangling him in the inky void of space.
Uranus' vision narrowed, but he stayed focused on the body of Charon moving in front of him, twirling in between the asteroids like she was dancing. His bow disappeared from his hands, Uranus instead throwing up his arms to protect his head and plowing through the walls of asteroids. He was too big to try to dodge all of them, and he could take a couple…hundred asteroids. Especially when he didn't have his bloody annoying chronic pain to hold him back!
"Come on Uranus!!!" Hope fluttered in his core, pushing away the frustration and anger and imbuing him with the strength to push just a little bit further. Push, push until he could see the light and was finally free! Push until he could rest. Push until he was safe. His hands shook, grand, powerful wings twitching and spasming against his back.
Charon shouted something, but it was lost to the sudden ringing in his ears. Woah, bloody hell what's going on?! What's wrong with him? Why–why is everything suddenly crashing down on him now? He had to…had to push, fight, survive. Just a little longer, just a little more strength needed, and then it would all be okay.
It's okay, the words endlessly echoed in his mind, but they weren't his this time. It's okay, it's okay, it's okay.
…Saturn?
His vision blurred and narrowed, darkening on the edges like space itself was bleeding into it. No…no no no come on Uranus fight. You're so close now, don't give up. The finish line is right in front of you, just hold on for a little longer.
The fuzzy form of Charon stood a few steps in front of him, shouting and screaming and pointing to the spot of space that was slightly more purpley and warped than its surroundings. That's it, Uranus thought, hopeful and excited in ways he hadn't felt in a while, that's his way out. That's–
His legs buckled, Uranus collapsing to his knees with a shrill cry. The stars swam and blurred beneath him, fading out of sight with his dimming vision. He…why was he suddenly so weak?! The universe was fighting back. Doing everything it could to keep him trapped. Ripping the last chance from his grasp. No! No, no no! He's so close! Please…please…
Uranus lifted his arm, everything suddenly so, so heavy, reaching for Charon as he crawled forward with the last shred of strength he had left.
But it was enough.
His fingers brushed the portal's edge, the sudden increase of gravity sucking him (and Charon) in without warning. He tumbled, whirled, flailed helplessly, his limp, exhausted body stuck in free-fall. He screamed, but all remaining breaths died in his throat, resulting in a pathetic sounding strangled gasp. The remaining, dull thoughts circling throughout his mind told him to brace for impact. Brace for what, he didn't know.
Only that it was going to hurt.
The darkness swirling around him grew lighter, staining with an off-yellow glow. Something that registered in the back of his mind as important–if he was paying attention to it.
But he wasn't.
Because at that moment a low, pounding ache washed through his entire body, stealing away all thoughts to the ever-lasting suffering.
It pulsed under his skin, behind his eyes, in his very bones, the surrounding light bursting into a bright, brilliant explosion–
And suddenly he was lying on his back.
He couldn't see, couldn't feel anything other than pain, couldn't fight his way out of his own mind.
But he could hear.
Through the eternal ringing in his ears, screams and shouts registered in his mind. Voices, those he recognized but couldn't name, filled the empty blankness, giving him something to hold onto. He could barely keep his head above the cold, dark waters threatening to pull him under at any moment, but the recognizable and comforting words kept him afloat.
He knew close to nothing, confusion and disorientation quickly became his best friends in this prison of his own mind.
But there was one thing he knew for certain.
He was alive.