Chapter Text
"You lousy good for nothing piece of shit" Lucy growls as she kicks the wheel of her orange Datsun, this is the third breakdown in a month, thankfully the boys had chosen to take the bus to school today, they are becoming a little too independent for Lucy's liking , but their friend catches the bus and his mother discreetly follows them at a distance to the stop.
She's already in the worst possible mood when the guy tries to car jack her , she just pushed the thing for two blocks, after she arrests him and zip ties his hands she calls roadside assistance to tow the car and an Uber to take her and her mugger to the station, being late on her first day is not something she needs, she wants to be happy here.
Her brief fling with Nolan, a fellow rookie had ended when he got too clingy, wanted to introduce himself to her kids, yeah, no , not happening, so she kicked him to the kerb, they are reluctant friends now, she doesn't want awkward at work . She sees Jackson on the steps outside as she hauls her arrest inside, he raises his eyebrows in question , she explains the attempted car jacking and they lead him in together, laughing as they sign in. Jackson has become her best friend during the six months at the academy.
"So, I take it Levi and Jude took themselves to school"? Jackson asks as they head to the locker rooms.
"Sort of, Deacon's Mom kind of ninja follows them to make sure they are ok, I know it's only a block away to the bus stop but I got car jacked, it scares me that they want to do this already", She sighs.
"And your Mom"? He asks.
"My Mom has very little to do with them, she maintains that having them ruined my life" she shrugs.
"You know you don't get a day off in the first year right? What are you gonna do on summer break or the Thanksgiving, Christmas holidays"?
"I don't know, go change, I don't want to get in roll call late".she points at the door and tells him they will talk later.
Her training officer is an ass, it really doesn't improve her mood, it's a shame in her opinion because he's cute for an older guy, she doesn't think he's as old as Nolan. She definitely has a thing for blue eyes though , and his are delicious, but he's still an ass.
She sits with Jackson and Nolan after buying her TO lunch, she had wanted to argue about having to buy him lunch as she only has her wage coming in and two boys to feed but she let's it go today. "So, how's Bradford? Looks kind of intense". Jackson asks as she slumps at the table.
"An ass hat", she sighs heavily.
"Cute though right"? He says sucking his juice through a straw.
She grimaces, "No! Mean and moody, made me walk outside the shop, plus he speaks Spanish, nevermind, not important, why does he hate me? I literally just met the guy, he has a stick so far up his ass, honestly I'm surprised he isn't choking on it".she pushes her fries around and pushes them away.
"Bishop is a little intense too" John says as he bites his burrito.
"Lopez is ok so far". Jackson adds " You know, Levi kind of looks a little like Bradford when he sulks" he says, looking over at the TO's table, a cheeky smile tugging at his lips.
Lucy sneers her nose up, "Ew, no he doesn't, my little angel is very handsome, TO Bradford has an ugly heart, you take that back , Jackson West" she points a fry at him as she glares.
Then after lunch the shit hits the proverbial fan, after meeting and fighting a dealer( her punishment ),called Ghost Head, (whatever helps Bradford get his rocks off) and meeting his druggy, estranged wife , her TO almost gets them both killed, he did in fact manage to get himself shot. It's when she pulls him out of the line of fire and places her hand on the wound to stem the bleeding that she thinks she recognizes him. Not because of his look, he has changed a lot in ten years, the thing she recognizes is the low groan he lets out as the pain hits him, a sound that has lived in her head rent free for a decade.
"Shoot back boot, don't worry about me", he orders. She's too in her head to move, this awful, bad tempered asshole of a man is possibly the father of her children , now she sees it, Levi's eyes, Jude's lips, both boys jawlines, well shit, this is not how she expected this day to go, not at all , and now he is bleeding out in some dingy back alley and might die , she's torn, should she tell him or leave well alone? She's about to speak when Angela and Jackson appear, followed by an RA.
Jackson takes her to one side after the scene is cleared and Bradford is on his way to hospital, "Hey are you hurt or in shock? You are literally white".
"Hmmm"? She asks still watching the ambulance drive away. "What"?
"Earth to Lucy, are you hurt"? He tries again.
She shakes her head as tears start to fall, "I think I need to transfer out", she whispers between sobs.
"Make sense Lucy, what happened to Bradford was not your fault, you know that right"? Jackson says handing her some wipes, "Here let's get you back to the station and get you cleaned up".
"I need to see Captain Anderson, or Grey or both, I think I'm breaking the rules, I need to, oh God he's...., Jackson you were right".
"Ok, thank you, what was I right about"? He smiles smugly.
"I think Bradford is my baby Daddy". She gasps as more tears fall.
"I was joking earlier, no way Lucy, I mean ...., you are kidding right"? His eyes are bulging out of his head.
She shakes her head, "My kids , maybe Dad" she air quotes, " is a total asshole, do I have to tell them? Should I tell him? I mean what if I don't and he finds out anyway? I'm so screwed". She whispers and looks over her shoulder to make sure no one else is listening.
"Maybe Dad, ? get proof before you blow up your whole career girl, what do you know about him, the guy who got you pregnant"?
She laughs maniacally"Just out of the army, a sergeant , third tour, second in Iraq, I think and his blues eyes" She shrugs.
"Nothing else"? He asks exasperated.
"Only what he sounds like when he cums". She supplies unhelpfully. "We didn't exchange names only bodily fluids, I for one was very drunk".
Jackson pulls a disgusted face, "So is that what you plan to tell sergeant Grey"? He shakes his head.
"I don't know , Jackson, I know I need to overthink this situation a lot before he comes back to work, I need to be honest with Grey at least, I might need to talk to your Dad find out what shit I'm in"?
"I suggest you go home and really think about what you want to do first ok". She nods as he walks away , Lopez calling him for the third time. Officer Jan drives Lucy back to the station.
When she gets home Rachel is with the boys. Lucy sits with them to eat dinner,she watches everything they do as they bombard her with questions, what is the station like? Do you get to ride with Jackson? What's your Training officer like ? Did you get to drive? Those sort of questions. Lucy should be more excited after her first day at work but she is stressed beyond belief. She waits until the boys go to bed and tells Rachel about Bradford.
"So could you see yourself wanting him in the boy's lives"? She asks delicately.
Lucy shakes her head, "Not if what I got today is the real him no". She replies honestly.
"And are you sure? Please be sure Lucy".
"I wasn't until I got home and watched the boys micro expressions, but now..., yeah I'm pretty fucking sure" she admits sadly, "Seems my Mom wasn't wrong, not the boys I never saw them as a mistake but my choice in men is diabolical". She pours a large glass of wine and drowns her sorrows.