Actions

Work Header

Niffty's Duck House

Summary:

Lucifer has gifts for everyone... rubber ducks in the likeness of each of the hotel residents. Niffty and Angel end up playing with their duck-dolls and creating an interesting story

Notes:

for the PentagramCity Discord server's FicFight Sinners vs Winners challenge. I got Winner and the prompt was duckies. Thanks to Sakuradancer3 for helping inspire this madness. Lol.

Work Text:

"I've made something special for everyone in the hotel," Lucifer announced cheerfully one afternoon apropos of nothing. It was the first time that Angel had ever noticed that the king of Hell ever sounded even slightly like his overly cheerful daughter. It was cute in its way. “Gather ‘round everyone,” he added. Angel shrugged, he had nothing to do right about now and this was more interesting than doomscrolling Voxstagram for another hour. He hopped off the couch and made his way over toward the King, along with Charlie who looked her usual overeager self, Vaggie who looked bemused with all of it. Of all the people Angel was surprised to see, besides Husk who frankly looked like he’d just been dragged out of a K hole, was Alastor. The Radio Demon was stood proud and tall as ever, but Angel could see a bit of trepidation about his ears, as if he was waiting for this to be a prank of some sort.

"Oh? An invention from the King himself? I do hope it's something useful for once," Alastor sneered with a wickedly sarcastic snarl. Lucifer rolled his eyes ignoring Alastor. It was all Angel could do not to giggle. Whatever trepidation the Radio Demon might have possessed, perhaps it was his natural instincts as a deer, he couldn’t seem to resist needling the King of Hell any chance he got. The pair seemed to have some weird feud going on that Angel couldn’t even hope to understand. Was it a power struggle? It wasn’t as though Lucifer would, or more accurately could do anything serious against Alastor. Vox had already proven that. To say nothing of the fact that even living in the same hotel the pair seemed intent to either prank each other into oblivion or otherwise ignore one another entirely. Angel was ready to take bets on how long it would be before their little prank war became an all out brawl. Alastor may have had that polite edge to him, but Angel had seen him eat guys for sport so he had money on the deer.

"Don't mind him Dad, he's just cranky he's not allowed to eat sinners anymore," Charlie said.

Alastor glowered, absolutely affronted by that. “Allowed? As if you can disallow me to do anything," he snarled his voice laced with static. Angel couldn’t help but giggle. It was an old conversation now and no one in the hotel was very scared of the Radio Demon these days, much to his immense chagrin. Angel suspected he’d be tempted to eat a resident out of spite just to show that he not only could but would. It was only by the sheer grace of his benevolence that they were not all currently dangling from his jagged teeth. He wasn’t beholden to any other demon since that whole debacle with Vox, and he’d been acting weird ever since that whole event. Angel had been meaning to talk to him about it but the demon was hard to communicate with at the best of times. Especially with the whole five foot rule thing. He practically disappeared any time anyone other than Niffty or Husk got too close. Angel wondered if that was related to the time he’d spent with Vox. Vox was never great with boundaries, Angel knew better than anyone.

"As I was saying…" Lucifer continued, knocking Angel out of his thoughts. "I made gifts for everyone. It's nothing much but, I hope you all like them," he waved his apple tipped cane and suddenly bags appeared in all of their hands. They were bright red and apple scented. Angel shook his half hoping for a vibrator of some kind, he squinted an eye into the bag and then pulled out a duck that looked like him. Huh. He didn’t know what he’d expected. The hair was a bit off but it had the mismatched eyes and his buxom bosom so it worked. Angel watched everyone else open theirs, he was particularly interested to see what the Radio Demon thought.

Alastor blinked at the bag in his hand, half certain it must be a mistake. He eyed it suspiciously, no doubt expecting it might blow up in his face. When it didn't, he reached his hand in same as everyone else and pulled out a duck. He stared at the object in his hand, squinting as though he might be able to disassemble it with his mind. It was a rubber duck like so many others that littered the hotel these days, designed in his likeness. It had deer ears and a monocle like him, and it even wore a little red suit. He hummed as he stared at it. Niffty bounced excitedly as she looked at her own. It was tiny, with one eye and hair just like hers. Angel couldn’t help but smile.

"Thanks dad," Charlie said.

"Thank you sir," said Vaggie.

"Hey thanks apple daddy," Angel remarked. Alastor eyed the buxom bosomed duck in Angel's hand. He snorted and rolled his eyes as if offended by the existence of Angel’s duck. Angel didn’t know whether or not he should have been offended or unsurprised. He never knew where he stood with Alastor at the best of times.

Alastor turned to Niffty and handed her his duck before patting her head then he turned on his heel and vanished into the shadows leaving them all standing there. Not that anyone had paid much attention to the demon’s escape other than Angel.

"Yay, more toys!" Niffty said bouncing excitedly.

"Come on Niff, why don't we go play," Angel suggested with a smile holding his hand out for Niffty. Niffty took it eagerly. Angel wasn’t sure when exactly he had become a surrogate mom for Niffty, whether it was after that whole incident at the club last year, after he’d stood up to Valentino for her, but he didn’t mind it. She didn’t need protecting. She’d proved that much after she’d killed Adam, and yet she possessed a certain innocence at times that Angel felt protective of. It was a rare thing anywhere, but especially in Hell. Niffty was an odd duck, no pun intended, but damn if she wasn’t a sweetheart.

"I had no idea the little maid would appreciate my gift the most," Lucifer remarked with a sniffle following after them. Charlie and Vaggie shared a look, not sure if they should go after the three or if they should leave them be. In the end they opted to wait it out. How much trouble could Niffty, Angel Dust, and the King of Hell get into playing with rubber ducks?

Niffty had pulled a full scale replica she had built of the hotel, made of popsicle sticks and if Angel had to guess some kind of Alastor brand of magic, out of a pocket dimension somewhere that Angel was entirely certain she was borrowing from Alastor, somehow. Niffty's replica was remarkably spot on. She quickly took her and Alastor's ducks and placed them into their proper spots with herself in the kitchen and Alastor in his office. Angel watched on. "Where should we put me?"

"I know the perfect spot," Niffty said excitedly as she placed Angel onto the sofa in the living room. Angel chuckled as he looked over at Lucifer who was watching Niffty's created world with wrapt fascination, he was laying on his stomach with his fists under his chin kicking his feet, as though he was about to watch a soap opera he was eager to bare witness to. Little did Angel realize just how true that assessment was about to become. Angel wondered if this wasn’t the first time Lucifer and Niffty had played like this.

Niffty picked up Alastor's duck, hopping him out of his office and into the living room towards Angel. Angel's duck looked up at him. "Ah, Angel Dust, you look comfortable," she voiced for Alastor. It was a remarkably impressive likeness, Angel thought.

"Ya know, living the dream," Angel said voicing himself. "Relaxin' 'fore work,” that felt true enough. He had no idea if he was meant to do anything specific or simply play himself as he normally would and so he had simply opted to play himself, hoping Niffty would correct him if she had some specific story in mind, looking at it like an acting challenge. He rarely got to stretch his improv muscles in his line of work so he decided to enjoy it as much as he could.

"You're always quite busy," Alastor's duck replied. "Tell me do you ever get a vacation?"

Angel snickered at the thought of Alastor ever asking him such a question, "Closest I get to a vacation is when some john fucks me up bad enough that I gotta recover for a few weeks,” Angel paused after he’d said it. It felt just a little too real. Just a little too on the nose for what was meant to be just a fun game with Niffty, still there was no taking it back now.

"Hmm," the duck pointed down in an almost contemplative fashion. "Well that just won't do! You really should have a proper rest my dear!"

"Good luck gettin' Val ta agree," Angel said.

"You do realize with whom you are speaking, yes?" Alastor remarked. Angel chuckled, he did have a point.

"Yer scary an all mistah Radio Duck Demon but—pretty sure Val would tell ya ta fuck off just ta spite ya, considerin' how Vox feels about cha an all,” Vox had been moping around Vee tower, hopping on his screen for months pouting about stupid Alastor, stupid overlords… stupid everything! Valentino hadn’t let him have his body back for fear he’d get too cocky again. Angel was surprised to know that Val did actually have one fear. Utter annihilation, especially at the hands of his lover all because he was so obsessed with the Radio Demon. Not that Angel could entirely blame him, he had a certain crush on Alastor himself that bordered on the wrong side of self destructive. Then again in Angel’s case that was more to do with his history with overlords than anything else.

"Never you worry about that my dear," Niffty continued. "I'll get you your time off yet," he assured.

Angel blushed. "And what will I owe ya?" he asked, trying for casually flirtatious. If he was going to play fantasy he might as well enjoy it, he thought to himself. Not as if he’d ever get to do this with Alastor for real.

"That is a discussion for a different time," the duck said. Niffty turned him around hopping him out of the living room and back into his office. Angel's duck stared after him. He hummed.

"That was weird," he said to no one in particular. He looked up to find that Lucifer was staring in wide eyed fascination at the scene, he was practically glowing with excitement. "Hey, ya highness, ya got a Husky duck? I could use a drink," Angel said, still using his duck to speak. Lucifer didn't take his eyes off the ducks, he merely snapped his fingers and a duck that looked just like Husker appeared at the bar. "Thanks toots," Angel said, he used the duck to kiss Lucifer's cheek before he hopped over to the bar. "Hiya Whiskers," Angel's duck purred.

Husk's duck groaned. Niffty had taken up this role as well, and as with her Alastor the impression was spot on. "What now?"

"Just wanted a little drink, and ta ask ya a question," Angel said.

"Ugh. Fine," Niffty turned Husk's back to Angel fixing him a little drink before he turned back around and handed Angel's duck the imaginary drink. Angel's duck took it.

"Thanks," Angel made drinking sounds, tilting his duck back and smiled. "Mmm. Just like the bootleggers used ta make."

"So what's this question?" Husk asked.

"Oh—uh…" Angel hummed, he suddenly felt self conscious even though it wasn’t real. "Look it's kinda weird an' all, but what's up wit ya boss?"

"Alastor?" Husk asked, moving to clean the bar top.

“You got anotha boss I don’t know about?” Angel asked, doing his best not to roll his eyes. Not that his duck could.

Husk’s duck managed to look annoyed at the sarcasm, moving about like he was cleaning the bar top. “What about him?"

"He's…I mean he's on this kick that I need a break," Angel replied. His duck looked one way down the hall near the bar then the other. "Between you an me, it's sweet but creepy. What if he just wants me around ta eat me?" Angel decided not to think too hard on how vaguely sexual that sounded, and how vaguely he might have wanted him too.

Husk snorted, "Al ain't gonna eat cha."

"How can you be so sure?”

"I've known him the longest," Husk replied with a groan. "He'll fuck with ya, tease ya, scare the shit out of ya, but he'll never actually eat anyone he respects or likes."

"Ya think he respects me?" Angel asked, surprised. It was all starting to feel just a little too real, he had to remind himself that this was just playtime with Niffty. Not an actual conversation he was having.

"I do," Husk replied. Angel blushed. Respect was rare in his industry, almost unheard of, though he craved it anyway. Respect from an overlord of Alastor's caliber, that was really unheard of. “Course you tell anyone and I’ll deny it, I don’t make a habit of bein’ nice.”

Angel chuckled. “Got it, thanks for the lickah whiskers," he said.

"Yeah yeah," Husk waved him off.

Angel giggled. "Yer real good at this Niff," he whispered.

"Thank you," she whispered back. She picked up Alastor's duck and hopped him back into the living room.

"Aha! Success my good man. Just as I expected," Alastor's duck said proudly.

"Ya did it already?" Angel asked.

"But of course, you simply have to know how to talk to people."

"Ya mean threaten," Angel replied.

Alastor chuckled. "It is effective I always find."

"Well how long I got?"

"A month."

"A month?" Angel asked shocked. Val had never given him off a month, ever. He was pretty sure he’d have to be half double-dead and even then he doubted it. "How could I ever repay you?" his voice cracked as he spoke the words and actual, real tears burned at the corners of his eyes. It’s just a game. It don’t mean anything in the real world, he reminded himself.

Alastor chuckled. "No need my dear," Angel took his duck and placed a gentle kiss on Alastor's duck's cheek. Niffty giggled as she took Angel's duck and began to make his duck and Alastor's make out. Angel blushed as he looked over at Lucifer who was watching with wrapt fascination. "Niff is this about to get x rated?" Angel asked. He was half joking but the gleaming look in her eye told Angel he might have been more spot on than he’d expected.

"Yes!" Niffty said with a maniacal laugh, smashing the ducks together. Lucifer was still watching as if taking notes, nodding his head along.

Angel got up from his spot on the floor and left Niff to it, blushing despite himself. It was inarguably the strangest game with not-dolls he’d ever played, and he’d played with his sister where most every game revolved around mafia shit.

"How are things going with Niff and her new toys?" Alastor asked appearing out of nowhere. Angel jumped. “Ah, I see she's found someone on her level to play with," he nodded at Lucifer. Angel swallowed.

"She's fine—just uh… ya know…girl stuff,” he had no idea how to even begin to explain everything in a way that would make sense. He looked over at Niffty again, thankfully with the way she was holding the ducks it was difficult to see exactly who was who or who was doing what. So why was he still blushing knowing that Alastor was standing there watching him.

Alastor raised an eyebrow but otherwise said nothing about the game, he turned his attention back to Angel. “Incidentally my good man, I’ve been meaning to tell you, you know you work very hard… perhaps you should get some time off."

"Huh?" Angel blinked, darting his eyes over to Niffty, was he dreaming or was Niffty predicting the future? He almost blushed at the thought. There was no way Alastor was serious right now.

"A break my dear, I would hope it's not that unfamiliar of a concept for you," Alastor remarked.

Angel blushed, his whole face turning magenta. “I… uh…” he swallowed and smiled. "I'd like that, Al, thank you," before he could stop himself he decided to be brave and leaned down, pressing a kiss to Alastor's cheek. He half expected the demon to shriek, or otherwise to be annoyed at him breaking the five-foot rule, but instead Alastor simply smiled softly with a small almost imperceptible blush as Angel sashayed away.

Alastor turned toward Niffty and Lucifer who were both watching him with matching grins. He hummed, adjusting his coat, plucking off some imaginary lint, then vanished into the shadows. Niffty and Lucifer snickered.

“You think they’ll go on a real date?” Lucifer asked.

Niffty smiled, as she smashed the two ducks together again. “Wait and see,” she giggled.

Series this work belongs to: