ClumsyAF



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Death isn't good for the soul and dead things can't die twice.

    Harry dies too many times to be fine. After the war he goes travelling; he and Tom Riddle always were too much alike for their own good.

    Language:
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    1/1
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    21 Jan 2025

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    When a Voldemort in his thirties encounters a time-travelling, seventeen-year-old Harry Potter, he makes a dangerous—and hilarious—assumption. He assumes that Harry is his son. And his son, of course, deserves the very best.

    A confused Harry plays along for the sake of self-preservation, but living with his “father” is proving to be intolerable in more ways than one.

    “You are mine,” Voldemort said gently, and smiled when Harry flinched. So the boy did know Voldemort, after all. He knew Voldemort was to be feared. “I will look after you, my own.”

    “I don’t belong to you,” Harry spat, despite his fear. Oh, what a delight he was! He was no cowering, simpering sycophant, like Voldemort’s other followers; no, this child had a spine of steel. Not many could stand before Voldemort without quailing.

    “You are my son,” Voldemort declared. “Of course you belong to me. Your every cell, your every fibre, your every heartbeat. You are mine in flesh and blood and soul. You are mine in magic. And you will not deny me.”

    Now with Chinese, Korean, Russian and Portugese translations, and featuring art by Mona and Hypnodisc!

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    Language:
    English
    Words:
    72,580
    Chapters:
    23/?
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    22 Dec 2024

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Harry is Minister Riddle’s secret sugar baby. What confuses him is why the Minister hasn’t fucked him yet, despite buying him a whole host of clothes that, if the way Minister Riddle stares at him is anything to go by, make him look extremely fuckable.

    Gaunt stepped over the threshold authoritatively, demandingly, like he owned the place. “Might I ask what you are doing here, young man?”

    Young man? Was he serious? Gaunt could only be around forty, but he sounded positively geriatric. “Delinquenting,” Harry replied, gesturing expansively at the dummies. “Can’t you tell?”

    “‘Delinquenting’ isn’t a word,” Malfoy put in.

    Harry blinked at him innocently. “Sorry, I don’t speak sycophant.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,550
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    3/6
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    22 Dec 2024

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    “You’re horrible,” Morgana hisses at him quietly enough than only he and Gwen will hear, tugging at his cloak until it sits better across his shoulders. Her face never changes from her pleasant smile. Terrifying. “Straighten your back, you will not slouch! Gwen, tell him not to slouch!”

    “Your Majesty,” Gwen says sweetly, “please do not slouch.”

    “I highly doubt he’ll be looking at me,” Arthur drawls, “when he’s come all this way to marry you.”

     

    (Arthur loses his father's trust, but he gains something better.)

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    18,102
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    3/3
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    01 Aug 2024

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    AU. The Potter twins survive Voldemort’s attack. However, Albus Dumbledore knows that the root cause of the war, pureblood bigotry and hatred against Muggles and Muggleborns, will endure even if Voldemort never returns. He therefore asks Lily and James to send one of their sons to grow up in the Muggle world while training the other to battle Voldemort, so that together the twins can smooth over the differences between the magical and Muggle worlds in the political arena. And perhaps it might have worked, if not for abusive Dursleys, Harry’s inability to fit into the magical world or his family when he learns of his heritage, and a boy named Theodore Nott.

    Language:
    English
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    29/105
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    28 May 2024