ColdestHeathen



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    “C’mon Schlatt, tell me. What’s your plan to become unfuckable?”

    “Already achieved it. Grew out the mutton chops and gained some weight. And let me tell you it worked.” He adjusts his cap with a wide smile. “I wear a fucking headband now. Bingo. Nobody wants to fuck me.”

    I drag my eyes over him. Slowly. Deliberately. “Really Schlatt…”

    “What?” He straightens up, catching my look.

    “You’re gonna have to try a whole lot harder than that.”

    OR On the set of a Markiplier production, Jschlatt is confronted by a woman who knows how to take charge - and it’s enough to break a man

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    33,225
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    168
    Kudos:
    229
    Bookmarks:
    35
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    19 May 2026