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putting the "cock" in cock-a-doodle-doo by softpiques
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
26 Jul 2022
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Summary
“See?” Childe says, leaning back on the sofa. “Zhongli says I'm straight.”
“Doesn't count, Zhongli would say anything to make you feel better.”
“Yeah,” Venti cuts in, “If you really were straight, you wouldn't mind kissing your homies goodnight.”
“Kissing my homies–? What the fuck are you even talking about?”
Childe tips his head back against the sofa, the mixture of alcohol and stupidity in the air doing wonders to his spinning head.
This is stupid. This is very stupid. Childe is not gay, and he is most definitely not going to play gay chicken just to prove it.…
But if he had to…
Childe downs another shot of firewater before pointing a finger at the man behind the kitchen counter.
“Zhongli, get your ass over here. We're playing.”
A totally straight Childe gets a birthday present from his totally straight friend. Said present is cock (it's no homo tho because it's all just part of a game, duh).- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,392
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 104
- Kudos:
- 2,331
- Bookmarks:
- 325
- Hits:
- 23,689
Bookmarked by Paus
03 Nov 2022
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- Words:
- 181,417
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 170
Bookmarked by Paus
05 Sep 2022
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Summary
“We are getting married.”
Obito coughed. “Who is. . . getting married?” he asked slowly.
Kakashi wanted to step on one of his feet but instead he pressed his hand harder. “But you and I, you silly. We are getting married.”Kakashi is an executive editor of a book publishing company. After learning he is about to be deported to his homeland because he violated the terms of his work visa, he "persuades" Obito, his assistant, to marry him.
Bookmarked by Paus
24 Jul 2022
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Obito thought quickly. "They're part of a... club... for babysitters."
"A club," said Kakashi, flat.
"Yep. A... babysitter's club."
"I see," said Kakashi, who clearly didn't see at all.
"Yeah, the clouds on the coats are supposed to be a soothing visual for kids?" Obito said, as he decided to dig himself deeper.
"In red and black."
"Okay, the color scheme could maybe stand to be changed," Obito conceded. He heard Konan snort from underneath the table.
He glanced briefly at Hidan, who was now shaking his shoulders, and the entire curtain, laughing at Obito.
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(Kakashi decides to raise Naruto. The Akatsuki takes a new direction.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,314
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 859
- Kudos:
- 20,183
- Bookmarks:
- 6,043
- Hits:
- 204,514
Bookmarked by Paus
23 Jul 2022
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Summary
Sakura only wanted Kakashi-sensei to stop reading porn in public, because it's kind of embarrasing, really. She thought that finding a girlfriend for him would be a perfect way to achieve that. What could go wrong, right?
Apparently, someone was disagree with her.
Just a little crack about an innocent misunderstanding and a cheesy marriage proposal.
Bookmarked by Paus
22 Jul 2022
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help me chase the shadows away by obikinn for Ghost_Owl
Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
24 Oct 2021
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Summary
“I know this type of thing can get awkward. So, um, I just wanted to reassure you that I swear I won’t fall in love with you for real,” Anakin said, lying through his teeth.
Or, Anakin and Obi-Wan get fake-married to help Jedi PR after the war. It goes well until it doesn't.
Bookmarked by Paus
15 Jul 2022
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Summary
Kakashi’s the sheriff of Konoha, a sleepy wild west town filled with colourful personalities, but little else to occupy his time. So when he hears rumours the Akatsuki gang have taken up residence nearby, he can’t resist the chance to catch their famed leader. But what Kakashi doesn’t yet know, is that after meeting Obito, his life is never going to be the same again.
- Words:
- 55,820
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 22
Bookmarked by Paus
12 Jul 2022
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Summary
Despite his stuck-up attitude, Kakashi couldn't help but find the Slytherin Chaser attractive, and he wanted to get into his pants as much as he wanted to shove a broomstick down his throat.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 80,907
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Comments:
- 113
- Kudos:
- 1,403
- Bookmarks:
- 235
- Hits:
- 27,140
Bookmarked by Paus
03 Jul 2022
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Summary
“What will my mission be?”
A smile slowly spreads across Minato’s face, ominous. “Your mission is to infiltrate Akatsuki, a notorious crime organization. Find out how they work and relate back any information to help us stop their illegal trades, and ultimately,” the man pauses as Kakashi watches him with apprehension. “Your goal is to get close enough to Akatsuki’s boss, Uchiha Obito, to nail him right in the head. He’s caught, and the Superintendent position is all yours.”
“I accept.”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 140,775
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Comments:
- 527
- Kudos:
- 1,134
- Bookmarks:
- 235
- Hits:
- 41,339
Bookmarked by Paus
02 Jul 2022
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Summary
The masked man from Akatsuki shows interest in Kakashi.
Kakashi isn't sure he likes it. But soon he won't have a choice.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,844
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 21
- Kudos:
- 1,071
- Bookmarks:
- 111
- Hits:
- 20,742
Bookmarked by Paus
24 Jun 2022
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Summary
It's been twenty years since the peace treaty was signed, but as a battle worn vampire, it's still hard for Kakashi to completely let go of his old grudges against werewolves. That is, until he meets a young werewolf in a bar claiming that they're mates.
Series
- Part 7 of OBKK AUs
Bookmarked by Paus
18 Jun 2022
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Summary
Obito Uchiha is known to be the most dangerous man in all of the galaxy - and with the Akatsuki under him? The most dangerous man possibly in the entire universe.
Kakashi's quite determined to get in his pants.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 23,720
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 128
- Kudos:
- 1,531
- Bookmarks:
- 243
- Hits:
- 28,250
Bookmarked by Paus
06 Jun 2022
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Bookmarked by Paus
03 Jun 2022
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Summary
Sokka takes a strategic step back, but he also smiles: triumphant, like he baited Zuko into exactly what he wanted. Like it’s a challenge. It’s the same way he looked when they sized each other up at the prison, with Sokka in chains that left red marks around his wrist, in tattered prison garb, malnourished and angry. Back then, that was Sokka saying: I see your power. I see you. Now, see me.
Zuko saw him then. And he sees him now; different, but the same. I see you.
Zuko lights his daos in flame. Sokka grins, back to gravel and heat. “Come on, Fire Lord. Impress me.”
Zuko burns. His vision flickers with fire. His heart races. His blood sings. His body is like a magnet, pulling ever onward to meet Sokka’s. He advances.
He pins Sokka to the wall, blades against his throat.
Or, Zuko found Aang first, Sokka and Katara were imprisoned in Boiling Rock for trying to rescue their dad, and all Sokka knows is he's pretty sure he's not supposed to think the Fire Lord is attractive but he's never let things like rules stop him before.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 89,864
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 259
- Kudos:
- 2,542
- Bookmarks:
- 881
- Hits:
- 36,550
Bookmarked by Paus
30 May 2022
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the perfect place to fall in love by tennessoui for Artemis_Unbound
Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
15 Mar 2022
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Summary
Obi-Wan is this season's Bachelor. Anakin is the host of this season's The Bachelor.
It's pretty much an unspoken rule that the host should not under any circumstances fall in love with the bachelor.
But someone really should have told Anakin that. And then reminded him. Many, many times.
Bookmarked by Paus
18 May 2022
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my beloved, how he shines by disast3rtransp0rt
Fandoms: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
04 Apr 2022
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Summary
“By the Right of Troth I hereby claim Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi as my Alpha, Mate, and the future Consort of Phaino.”
Obi-Wan opened his mouth, closed it, and then blinked owlishly at the young royal for several tense moments. Yoda cleared his throat and clarified, “Consent to the claim, Master Kenobi must. The Right is not binding until agree, he does.”
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With his palms sweating profusely into the dark fabric covering his knees, Obi-Wan stood from his seat. He dropped his hands to his sides and bowed at the waist, unsure of exactly how formal this process was meant to be, before straightening and replying to Prince Anakin: "I hereby consent to your claim of the Right of Troth."
Bookmarked by Paus
14 May 2022
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Lex Talionis by intermundia
Fandoms: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types, Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) - All Media Types
21 Mar 2021
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Summary
The ancient Galactic Republic is dying slowly—an ugly death of corruption, sprawl, and decay—with the sin of slavery hanging over its every triumph. The beleaguered Jedi Knights are too few to adequately patrol and police the entire Republic, and are faced with complacency and greed at every turn. Born into a crumbling and stagnant galaxy, Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker are faced with the greatest challenge of all: themselves.
Obi-Wan likes rules and control. When the galaxy around him stops playing by the rules, what is a Jedi to do? Anakin needs rules and restraint. When the galaxy around him conspires to set him loose, what is his Master to do? Falling slowly or falling fast, falling through lust or falling through wrath—it all leads to delusion and moral decay. What can be born from the ashes?
Or, how Obi-Wan and Anakin fell to the dark side, obtained their revenge, and saved the galaxy in the process.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 187,143
- Chapters:
- 24/24
- Comments:
- 904
- Kudos:
- 3,501
- Bookmarks:
- 1,177
- Hits:
- 150,167
Bookmarked by Paus
07 May 2022
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Summary
Kakashi isn’t thrilled when he’s set up—again—with a new partner, but once he meet the new one, he starts reconsidering things
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,487
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 74
- Kudos:
- 3,352
- Bookmarks:
- 625
- Hits:
- 50,795
Bookmarked by Paus
27 Apr 2022
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Summary
Some untethered ABO smut.
Kakashi presents during a mission. Minato is there to help him through it.
Bookmarked by Paus
23 Apr 2022
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Summary
Minato's best friend sets him up on a series of hilariously bad blind dates, and over time, he finds coming home to his son and his baby sitter better than going out all the time.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 26,546
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 138
- Kudos:
- 756
- Bookmarks:
- 141
- Hits:
- 11,762
Bookmarked by Paus
23 Apr 2022