SimplyMonkey
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As the door opened Tim quickly disabled another three separate electronic sensors in the doorjamb by swiping them with a device that looked a bit like a thumb drive. “Walk where I walk,” he said.
He took a big step over the doormat, eyed the floor carefully, then took a careful skipped sidestep to another mat against the right-hand wall, where he removed his shoes.
“What the hell?” whispered Jason, still standing in the open doorway.
Tim pointed up. There was a net rigged up on the ceiling. “Pressure pads under the carpet.”
“I repeat, what the hell?”
After Tim completely derails Jason’s beatdown attempt by asking him for a hug, Jason’s first priority is to get this touch-starved kid more cuddles. Tim’s first priority is to avoid Dick’s traps.
Jason learns a lot about his brothers and what happened while he was away, and something about himself too.
- Language:
- English
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- 6,819
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 306
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- 8,515
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Bookmarked by SimplyMonkey
08 Jan 2026
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mongrels who ain't got a penny by stillateenageabomination
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types
23 Dec 2025
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"Jeez, you're morbid." When the kid just bared his teeth in what could be generously described as a grin, if one were to squint and generally have the vision quality of a mole, Jason turned back to the rapidly paling Tim. "You want to sweep the place for signs of Nightwing while I wrap things up with junior over here?"
"Junior," the kid scoffed, which was real fucking rich for someone who was an inch or two from being strictly categorized as fun-sized. "Fuck off."
"Hey, watch your mouth. Kids who don't know times tables aren't allowed to swear."
"I can multiply just fine, jackass."
"Hood," Tim cut in, voice squeaky like it'd been squeezed-compressed-squashed ten times over. "I don't need to keep looking for Dick. He's right there."
or, who would've thought that a de-aged Dick would be really angry, really annoying, and really attached to Jason?
(Bruce. Bruce would've thought. This might be his worst nightmare, actually.)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 20,970
- Chapters:
- 3/4
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- 172
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Bookmarked by SimplyMonkey
08 Jan 2026
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when you wish upon a star by KlyssaCarrie
Fandoms: DCU (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
23 Oct 2025
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There is blood, everywhere. Red stark against the white of Joker’s cheek, staining green roots, seeping into his purple suit. His smile is frozen, affixed to his face.
or, Jason kills the Joker. This comes at a cost.
Written for Birdwatchers’ 365 Challenge, day 296, ‘paradox’
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 857
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- 1/1
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- 1
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- 6
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- 103
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- 15
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Bookmarked by SimplyMonkey
07 Jan 2026
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“Oh no,” Tim deadpans, looking straight at the camera. “I’ve been kidnapped. Whatever shall I do.”
Tim wants to ditch the quarterly WE board meeting. Jason wants cash. There is a painfully obvious solution here.
Or; Jason kidnaps Tim for ransom whenever it's convenient. Bruce just wishes they’d both ask him for things normally, like regular people.
Series
- Part 11 of fueled by coffee, spite and kirby music
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,514
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 7
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- 94
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Bookmarked by SimplyMonkey
07 Jan 2026
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“I will personally gouge out your remaining intestines with that wretched spoon if you keep up that incessant tapping.”
“I have ADHD, you pretentious prick. If you’re bothered then just tell me, don’t threaten me, because if we’re doing threats, how about I shove this spoon down your—”
(Dick sends Damian and Tim out to the gardens to cool down from their fighting and when they come back in, they're suddenly best friends. And what was that about tomatoes and time loops?)
Series
- Part 36 of impravidus's batman quick reads
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,097
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 3
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- 53
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Bookmarked by SimplyMonkey
07 Jan 2026