Somewhat_timeless
Fandoms
Recent works
Recent bookmarks
-
Tags
Summary
It begins, as all things do, with her right hand shoved up a well-greased turkey’s butt.
“Talk fast Humphrey, because in case you haven’t noticed, this delicate hand here — ” Blair hisses, wiggling said hand that was currently plunged wrist-deep in the poor fowl’s carcass, “ — was not designed for prolonged contact with raw poultry!”
“Oh, shoot, wait,” mutters Dan, eyes darting towards his laptop screen. “Martha Stewart says we’re supposed to rub a sprinkle of salt and pepper, y’know, inside the cavity before we fill it up — ”
Blair’s eyes widen in horror. “And you couldn’t tell me this before I grabbed a handful of stuffing and shoved it straight up a turkey’s ass??”
(or: Dair, Christmas holiday shenanigans, and perhaps the blossoming of something new…? 🩷)
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
14 Dec 2025
-
Tags
Summary
He’ll get over it eventually. He comes close, in between one moment and the next, or he at least convinces himself he does. But then he looks back in his notes about the Forum and spots a pair of Chanel flats on someone’s feet in the streets and he’s right back where he started, thinking it might take him longer to get over it than it ever did to build the city he’s currently in.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
04 Aug 2025
-
Tags
Summary
Blair Waldorf is supposed to be getting married. She’s supposed to be in Monaco, soaking up the sun with her prince, the one she’d fought tooth and nail to keep. Dan Humphrey is supposed to be in the Hamptons, forgetting all about their misbegotten kiss and the feelings that arose with it.
Neither are where they are supposed to be.
//
Season 4 finale/season 5 au: blair didn’t sleep with chuck at the bar mitzvah, she went to Monaco with Louis without making up with Chuck after the events of the end of 4x20Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
20 Jul 2025
-
your touch brought forth an incandescent glow by automatiques
Fandoms: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
28 Jul 2025
Tags
Summary
London 1816. It's Lady Sansa Stark's third season and she's determined to find a husband this year and finally escape Lord Baelish's unwanted attentions. However, she meets Captain Theon Greyjoy, an unrepented rake who gives her some respite from the ton and Lord Baelish. Her friends tell him she needs a husband, not a lover. Her friends warn her not to fall for his charms. Do any of them heed their advice?
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
14 Jul 2025
-
another mistake (all i could make in my immature state) by blerenaskiss
Fandoms: Gossip Girl (TV 2007)
13 Jul 2025
Tags
Summary
Blair watches The French Connection
or
Blair remembers being in love
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
13 Jul 2025