carmenile
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Ivan breathes a humorless laugh. "I don't know what it is you want from me."
Till furiously snaps back, "I want you to—" before cutting himself off. He takes a deep breath and relaxes his scrunched-up facial features before continuing, quieter. "I'm your best friend. I find you half passed out in some—fucked up garden that you've been coughing up for a year, and I'm freaking out because I don't know what's going on or—or if you'll be okay, and now that I know you're okay, the doctors are saying they can't let you go because you're too damn sick to be left alone!"
His lower lip quivers ever so slightly. Ivan, for his own sake, unfocuses his eyes until Till is only a shapeless blur of colors in the middle of a sea of hospital white.
"I'm your best friend," the blur repeats, breathlessly. "I want you to fucking say something to me."
Hanahaki disease is, quite famously, a condition born from love. Ivan is convinced that his case is the exception to this rule. And when each of his friends inevitably starts catching on to his quickly deteriorating health, everything goes spinning out of control.
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“Why are you here?” Till asks. He means it to sound scathing, but it comes out as jagged as a dull knife. It’s been a long day, or maybe a short day; Till has no grasp on time, or his surroundings for that matter, and he can feel that there’s still blood all over his face and probably spit and dirt and it’s objectively nasty, and scary, and… Ivan doesn’t budge.
He just looks at him with that look. The weird, blank one. “Sometimes, you are the one who asks stupid questions,” Ivan says.
Till can’t figure Ivan out. Still, Ivan’s kindness, albeit weird, is something Till can’t help but be drawn to.
Series
- Part 2 of the love was there
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Ivan buries his face in her hair. Plants his lips on her head, like how Mizi does on her cheek. It feels different coming from him, though. She doesn’t have enough time to protest before he’s pulling away to look at her, and Sua is nice enough to look back.
“Please, Sua,” he almost whispers, with such a look of captivating sadness in his eyes that reminds Sua why he’s the favorite. “Don’t.”
Suddenly, she sees her sister’s face in Ivan’s, clearest she’s seen in years. You don't want to go "pop!" and die, do you?
Sua and Ivan must be twins. This probably isn't a good thing.
Series
- Part 1 of the love was there
Recent series
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Summary
“the love was there. it didn’t change anything. it didn’t save anyone. there were just too many forces against it. but it still matters that the love was there.”
a series of canon-compliant alien stage oneshots dedicated to exploring each of the one-on-one relationships between 4nakt 🤍
- Words:
- 6,607
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 5
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Till goes quiet, toying with the frayed edges of the blanket. Ivan watches him closely as he hesitates. Usually, Till is easy to decipher. His brow furrows when he’s worried. A telltale twitch at the corner of his mouth means he’s trying not to laugh. He blushes when he’s embarrassed, and turns a particularly beautiful shade of red when he’s angry. But right now, Ivan hasn't the faintest idea what he’s thinking.
“So, uh. Last night was crazy, huh?” Till says. He’s trying for casual, but Ivan can’t help but notice that Till is still avoiding his eyes.
Ivan and Till watch the solar eclipse together. It's as simple as that, until it isn't.
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Anakt’s 50th class have a field trip to the beach.
“The sky opening up,” Ivan said, “could explain the state after a heavy rainpour, the beginning rays of the sun shining through after an insistent darkness.” Thoughtfully, his eyes had glanced in Till’s direction before turning back to the ceiling above them, where a pixel in the middle of a static cloud flickered. “It was also, some believed, a description of an event that happened during the end of everything. A remaking of sorts. A splitting of the world. Fascinating, no?”
One of Till’s hands had cupped itself over the other, rubbing at each of his knuckles in turn. They’re not too different, he thought. An ending to all of this would be a kind of clearing too.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,918
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 1
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- 5
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- 28
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Bookmarked by carmenile
13 Feb 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
makes me emotional in the best and worst ways
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One day Sua looked at Mizi, pink hair getting in her eyes as she giggled about something she’d just said, and realized that losing her would be more devastating than getting shattered to never be put whole again.
There’s no meaning to her existence, no reason for her to keep on living if Mizi is no longer there with her. What use is a doll without an owner? If nobody is there to marvel at its beauty, at the fine way she was sculpted, what is it if not a dust-covered ornament?
Sua has always been prone to breaking.
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fishing for grief & other easily escapable emotions by anumone_7
Fandoms: Alien Stage (Web Series)
27 Jan 2026
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"Do you believe in heaven, Agent Red Star?" Mizi wonders, peering up at Ivan. Her neck hurts. Everything hurts, really. It feels stupid. Her mother has already told her that she's going to the store today to get a new fish, so the other one in the pair doesn't notice and tragically give in to loneliness. Mizi wishes her pain were so replaceable, too.
"Would you like me to believe in it, Agent Pink Jellyfish?" he asks, leaning down so they are at eye level. When the adults do it, Mizi tends to feel even smaller. But when Ivan does it, she feels just right-sized. "I mean, I do believe they have to go somewhere. The law of conservation of energy demands it."
Mizi sighs, shoulders sagging. "I think I slept through that lesson. Do you think Till's mother went to the same place, too?"
(Or: Mizi's goldfish dies, leaving her pondering over its fate. Ivan suggests a more practical method of mourning. Spoiler Alert: They decide to eat it.)
Bookmarked by carmenile
11 Feb 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
muy intersante... i love a good friendship study and grief study... this is precious, spot-on mizivan
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Constellation of the Jelly Star by pinecow for carmenile
Fandoms: Alien Stage (Web Series)
07 Jan 2026
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Summary
At home, it seemed everything could be a coincidence, the identicality of every room, her eight adopted sisters who sat at a range between two years older and two years younger than Sua herself, who all had round eyes and dark hair, who were all always dressed in thick satin frills, and whose birthdays fell in succession during the last three months of the year. It was arbitrary yet surgical, the precision with which their mother decided what was worth loving in her children.
Sua would try to deal with this suffocating sameness in small reminders that she could be different, if only in the length of her fingernails, the skew of her smile, the undisciplined shrill of her voice when her sides were tickled. The truth is, she learned these small triumphs from Mizi who already had many strange enthusiasms as a child which gave her a personhood, such as running in circles until she fell over and coming to rest against Sua to mumble with an unwavering passion about nonsense until she made herself break into a fit of giggles.
Every train eventually reaches its destination. Sua has spent her life convinced she could always hear its encroaching whistle chasing her.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,252
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 10
- Kudos:
- 22
- Bookmarks:
- 6
- Hits:
- 291
Bookmarked by carmenile
08 Jan 2026
Bookmarker's Notes
words cannot describe how perfect this fic is, the quietness that is carried throughout this story and the remnants of family and childhood that is so present in sua as well as the other three... and one of my favorite mizisuas ever (AND SUATILL!!!!!!!!)