pandarubrum
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"Welcome to a new user experience! You have triggered this interface with the keywords, ‘Stupid game! Stupid devs! I want my f*****g money back!’ You are now bound to the character Tartaglia, the Eleventh Harbinger of the Fatui, codename: Childe! We hope you have an enjoyable user experience and we welcome you once again to Genshin Impact 2.0!”
Those are some of the first words Ajax, starving college student extraordinaire, has the misfortune of hearing upon waking up in a brave new world from what he's fairly sure is a very fatal accident involving water and a shit ton of electricity.
Okay, so he's not dead. That's good. But what's this about him being stuck playing the character Tartaglia? Tartaglia, as in the no-good, one-dimensional, cartoonish villain who met his untimely, gruesome death in the first act of the original game?
Forget this. Like hell Ajax is going to share that fate.
And so begins one man's journey to save himself from his awful destiny.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 560,073
- Chapters:
- 46/46
- Collections:
- 57
- Comments:
- 28,691
- Kudos:
- 43,793
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- 7,264
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- 2,010,506
Bookmarked by pandarubrum
22 Aug 2025
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When Rex Lapis received the contract proposition from the Tsaritsa herself, he considered it thoroughly. Amidst the various conditions and technicalities, Rex Lapis issued a crucial demand: a helping hand in challenging the people of Liyue.
Without this aid, he declared, he couldn’t part with the Gnosis—his land, this diamond of the city, must be protected at all costs.
The Harbinger, wreaking havoc upon Rex Lapis’ beloved city, proved to be more resourceful than the combined strength of the Adepti and the Qixing. As the Jade Chamber collapses beneath the force of an ancient god, Morax, the Lord of Geo, returns from the dead.
Or, more accurately, from his disappointingly brief retirement.
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Written for ZhongChiLi Week 2024
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 100,596
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Collections:
- 2
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- 104
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- 549
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- 103
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- 19,822
Bookmarked by pandarubrum
21 Aug 2025
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The world came into focus slowly. A soft bed beneath his back and a heavy comforter weighing down his chest. It was warm and comfortable. Ajax didn’t want to open his eyes. But he could sense he wasn’t alone and after his terrible few nights, he couldn’t risk letting his guard down,
He blinked his eyes open and everything looked strange. Colors were heightened and he groaned as a headache throbbed behind his eyes.
“Take it slow,” Zhongli told him, his voice soft and closer than Ajax expected.
“What h-happened?” he asked. “The last thing I remember was…”
The memory of that horrid burning pain rushed in and Ajax reached for his neck. It was still bandaged and sore. God, he was so thirsty.
“It was the only way,” Zhongli said sadly. “I am sorry.”
Amor fati: Latin; love of fate; accepting positive and negative experiences in one's life.
Ajax learns to love and live again with the help of Zhongli.
Series
- Part 5 of ZhongChi Week 2025
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,918
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 3
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- 81
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- 7
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- 764
Bookmarked by pandarubrum
24 Jul 2025
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To forgo the chance to eliminate Rex Lapis just to pleasure him—that is the arrogance of the young, the brash, the undefeated.
“Show me yourself,” Zhongli orders, perhaps arrogant as well, old, bored and undefeated.
The hitman chuckles softly but complies, raising his hands to lower the mask. It now rests around his neck, revealing his face. Zhongli examines him—not for strategic purposes. He simply enjoys the pretty face, the cheerful smile of tempting lips, the flush covering freckles on his cheeks.
“How handsome you are,” he remarks. Compliments are the easiest way to gauge a person. There is something genuine, unfiltered, in the way people react to praise—something no amount of training or self-discipline can fully mask.
Six months ago, Fatui's attempts to eliminate Rex Lapis began—from plots to disrupt his work to assassination attempts. None of them have been competent enough to harm Rex Lapis personally, so when he is attacked in the car park of his own building, and the assassin does indeed have impressive martial arts skills… the blood in his veins rushes faster and pounds louder in his ears.
Series
- Part 2 of DARK ROMANCE
Bookmarked by pandarubrum
24 Jul 2025
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The handwriting is not as sharp as he’d envision from a man whose mission is honing himself into a blade. It carries an innocence that sits completely opposed to the death it heralds. The cursive bends elegantly around imaginary straight lines, every letter flawlessly aligned, masterfully connected to the others with fine yet firm strokes. A most intriguing penmanship, revealing a precision that Zhongli can’t help but hope he’ll soon be acquainted with. The fangs behind the smile.
It takes a single reading to memorize the name and the address noted down, yet his stare lingers on the words some more, as if they could answer the cravings of a god’s curiosity. They leave him with a charming promise of more.
Or: Zhongli develops a fascination towards Childe's violence.
Bookmarked by pandarubrum
23 Jul 2025