Chapter Text
A day off work is always linked to some relaxation. Getting out with friends or spending time at home, gathering much-needed energy that helps people deal with more tough days. It was one of those for Caitlin Snow, as on this very sunny Saturday afternoon she found herself walking at the downtown of Central City with her best friend, Iris.
Two things that were rare for her.
First, being a doctor at the city’s hospital didn’t allow her to have much spare time, especially a whole day like today. Last 18 months she was giving all of her at work, as she didn’t have anything better to do than that. She was taking most of the night shifts and she was politely offering to finish some of her colleagues' work so that they could go back home to their loved ones. If being honest here, nothing at this point was making her more complete than helping people. So, she never complained about it.
It was her absolute dream to follow this job, and she spent her teenage years studying hard in order to get that scholarship in Central City’s university, and utterly become a doctor once she graduates from there.
She did it. All those late nights next to her physics and chemistry books were worth it. If someone could confirm that for her, that would be her 30-year-old self, who was more than pleased for what she was doing ever since she took the Hippocratic oath. It was making her complete and she could always forget any kind of problems she was dealing with.
The second had to do with her actually getting out of her home on a free day. Caitlin was a single woman, not out of choice though. It seems like she wasn’t this lucky in love as she originally thought so.
After a few months of doing her practice in the hospital, Caitlin met young, actually two years older than her, doctor of pathology, Ronnie, as he wanted to be called instead of his full name that was written on the card on his white robe ‘Ronald’.
Ronnie Raymond was a pretty man, he was treating her nice, they were having fun and both of them could say that they were in love. She wasn’t seeking more than what he was offering to her and she was happy with her life.
She had everything that a normal woman could ask for, a steady job, good friends, and a nice boyfriend by her side. And she really liked him, she couldn’t lie. After a year of them being a couple, he made the big step. He asked her to marry him, and she didn’t say no. She felt like this was the best moment of all. Someone loved her this much, that he wanted to spend all his years with her. It wasn’t easy to realize.
Months passed and Caitlin and her fiancée were never happier. They were talking about a honeymoon, Ronnie was rooting for Italy, but Caitlin’s dreamy destination was Tahiti. She always wanted to go there with the love of her life, drink cocktails, and enjoy on the beach, while they celebrate the beginning of their marriage. Of course, he agreed with her at the end. He could never say ‘No’ to her, he was even teasing her that was her superpower.
They had the date booked, the perfect place for the ceremony, wedding invitations were sent to all their friends and family, almost everything was ready… although, there was one problem.
She couldn’t find the perfect wedding dress she wanted. She’d almost given up, when her best friend and soon her maid of honor Iris woke her up one morning, screaming how she found it. Caitlin almost jumped from the bed and woke Ronnie in the process as she was trying to find something to wear.
“I have to go, I’ll see you at the lunch!” she said and kissed him in a hurry before she left the room. The man just laughed at her excitement and glanced at the clock, realizing it’s time for him to start getting ready for work.
“Iris this is it!” Caitlin was looking at her reflection in the mirror, admiring the beautiful white dress. She found it, just a month before the big event, how lucky she could be. Now everything is going to be perfect.
She was supposed to work the night shift that day, but she knew that Ronnie was already there, so she decided to meet him at his lunch break and tell him the great news. But, the moment she walked inside the building, she could feel that something was wrong.
“Hey Kara, do you know where is Ronnie?” she asked one of her friends and colleagues with a smile, but her face worried her.
“Cait, I have to tell you something”, the other girl was serious and almost on the verge of tears.
-“No, no, no, this is a joke and it’s not funny! Guys, please tell me this is some horrible joke, tell me that he is all right.” Caitlin was laughing and crying at the same time, thinking how this can’t be happening.
“I’m so sorry Caitlin, it was the drunk driver and…” her friend had a hard time explaining what happened because Caitlin was looking at her with hope in her eyes, the hope that she will tell her that he survived, that he’s gonna be okay. “He died immediately. He didn’t suffer.”
All those sent wedding invitations, her perfect wedding dress… their future together, it’s all gone now. Everything died with Ronnie. At least that’s how Caitlin felt.
After the accident Caitlin was some kind of living ghost. She had lost herself, her laughter, her will to work, and basically all of the stuff that were making her who she was. She spent a while at home, and she wasn’t leaving the couch unless it was something important.
Iris wanted to be by her side during this hardship and so did she. At first, she offered her to stay at her home, in order for her not to be alone but Caitlin declined. Iris had her own life, she thought there was no reason for her shoulder to become wet from all the tears she would shed over Ronnie’s very unfair and tragic death. But her friend could be described as stubborn, and maybe she didn’t spend nights comforting Caitlin, but she was calling her many times per day, just to check on her and listen to her voice.
And like that, time passed. Caitlin, after ten days of complete isolation at her home, or their home as they were calling it back in the day, decided that it was time for her to get back at work, and so she did.
Things like that happen, that was what she was trying to tell herself all this time in order to stand back on her legs and find her lost power. The real deal was what she would do once he was gone.
Revisiting the hospital again, the place she met him and shared a lot of memories together, she knew it would break her again, but her best friend tried to limit Caitlin’s heartbreak by adapting her most silly self and make her laugh as much as she could out of work hours.
Time was passing and just because there were no walks by the harbor or dinner dates and other little stuff she and Ronnie used to do, she focused on her work and in a way that was unhealthy for her, as Iris was keeping telling her, sometimes sounding like a broken record.
She was declining every suggestion her friend was making for an outgoing, with the excuse that she was busy and overwhelmed with her doctor’s duties, but deep down she was too afraid that everything different and out of ordinary would remind her of her lost love. And she felt like somehow, she wouldn’t honor him enough.
Then again, she was a young, beautiful woman with a whole future ahead and the only way to make peace with it was to actually move on and keep him in her heart, like a great memory.
But today was a little different. She had a day off, and Iris knew that very well, so she really had no excuse.
It was a rare opportunity for her to sleep a little longer, so she woke up around 10 am, and just when she was drinking coffee, her phone buzzed, showing her friend’s smiley face there.
“Get ready, you are going out with me today.” Iris’s voice was cheerful, maybe even more than usual.
“Iris, I don’t…”
“Listen, it’s nothing you won’t like, I promise, it’s just a book signing in that bookstore near Jitters.” When Caitlin got quiet Iris continued “Come on Cait, I really want to go but I don’t want to do it alone.”
“Since when you are so passionate about books?” Iris was working as a reporter for CCPN, she was undoubtedly one of the finest, and although Caitlin knew that she is smart and educated, she never remembered her being this excited about some book signing and it was really weird.
“Well, maybe since the guest is really cute and my favorite writer, I don’t know if you heard about him, HR Wells.”
Caitlin almost chocked on her coffee. Of course she knew who he was, in fact, she‘s got every single book he wrote. It was an understatement to say that she was a fan. But she always kept that in secret. In fact, the only person who knew about her ‘obsession’ was Ronnie, since she couldn’t hide all the books when they moved in together.
And the reason why she was hiding that from everyone, even from her best friend was that she didn’t want people to think that she is just another woman, drooling over a handsome writer. She appreciated his talent, his passion, how he gave his heart and soul in his books, long before she found out how he looks.
“Hellooo, Caitlin are you there?” she completely forgot that Iris asked her a question and she didn’t give her the answer.
“Yes, I’ve heard about him, okay, I’ll get ready.” She hangs up her phone and moved to the bookshelf. She already knew which book she’s going to take for him to sign. The one he wrote a couple of years ago, the one that touched her the most.
They say that you shouldn’t meet your heroes, but Caitlin wondered how he was because his words really found the way to her heart. Well, she’ll find out soon…
Like that, she was walking on the pavement next to the city’s most famous road, heading to that bookstore iris told her about.
She was going out for necessary stuff, or the drug store, maybe some shopping after an extensive effort from her friend’s side. Sometimes, she was running by the beach to keep fit, once in a week if that was possible with her schedule, not that she needed it.
Caitlin was a doctor though, so she acknowledged the importance of exercise in her routine. She was in an excellent shape, her body was admirable at least. She was quite tall for a woman, with great analogies and she couldn’t tell she had any problem with how she looked. She was confident enough with her physical appearance, but she had always been modest about it.
As a woman, she’s spent big part of her life getting herself educated. What she had realized is that people around aren’t attractive only with looks, but with states of mind, beliefs and strong words. And maybe that was what won her in that writer they were about to visit, the power of the words. How feelings could occupy her heart with simple phrases.
“Hey, I’ve brought with me two books for Wells to sign for us. I purchased “Separated lives” yesterday for this exact purpose!” Iris was still in the excited mode she was when she first talked with her on the phone.
Iris was quite a happy person, if you will. She was kind, humble and caring, but comparing to Caitlin, she had another, more bright attitude in things. She was always able to make her laugh, even in the darkest of days and she was standing by her as great listener and problem solver in any kind of difficulty. In her dictionary, that was the synonym of friendship.
And she couldn’t appreciate more her presence in her life since their university days. She was quite lucky that they didn’t have to be apart after graduation.
“I think I’ll pass, I don’t pretty much like that one.” Caitlin said and at the same time she was pulling something out of her bag.
“What?” Iris asked a bit stunned with her answer.
“I’ve read it, and it didn’t live up to my expectations.” Her reply came straight and raw while she held the item she retrieved from her bag. “I’ll have this one signed, I think it’s my personal favorite. I have read it a few times by now.”
“Hard love..”, Iris read the title of the book. “but hey, I thought you said you just know Wells, not actually read his books like that.” She continued, saying her thought out loud.
“Okay, maybe I’ve read all of his work, not a big deal.” Caitlin tried to sound a bit cool about it.
“Hmm, whatever, I can’t wait to have this signed by him!”
Walking a few meters more, having just passed Jitters, a coffee shop that they were hanging at occasionally, but grabbing their usual coffee and cinnamon rolls every day, the bookstore in search could be seen.
“That’s the one!” Iris exclaimed.
They entered the bookstore, and Caitlin was a bit surprised that it was actually full already. There were a few men, but the visitors were mostly women. From teenage girls, all the way to the ladies in their 60s, and they were all holding a book, waiting for the man to show up.
“Honestly, I didn’t expect that there’d be so many people like Stephen King is coming.” Caitlin chuckled a bit and then her friend subtly pointed towards the middle of the room.
“Well Cait, Stephen King certainly doesn’t look like that.” She turned her head to look at the table that was set and the writer himself there, preparing for the reading some of the parts from his newest book.
Caitlin couldn’t deny that he was indeed handsome, and how she could see from afar, he had a nice face too. He was talking with a lady who owned the bookstore, he was smiling and she could swear that he has dimples too, but she wasn’t sure because of the distance. Plus, his dark maroon jacket and white dress shirt with perfectly tamed hair proved that he had a style too.
Still, she didn’t like the way most of the visitors were just watching him. Half of them probably bought the book just so he could sign it and give them the chance to say ‘Look, I have his autograph!’ not because they cared what he wrote. It was making her angry how people can be so shallow sometimes.
In some weird way, all that reminded her of men looking at women’s bodies like they are a piece of meat, and she would say the same was happening here, only the roles were reversed. That’s the main reason why she was quiet about her passion for Wells’ work. She didn’t want to be categorized as one of them.
“I’ll try to find a place somewhere in the front, you coming with me?” Iris asked and Caitlin declined.
“No thanks, I’ll be fine here.” She smiled politely and Iris nodded so they agreed to meet when the signing starts before she left.
“Hello, ladies, and few of you gentlemen.” The man started and waved at the men who were in there, and immediately caused the laughter. “Thank you for coming, and I gotta say, you all look great today.”
Caitlin found the perfect place in the very back of the large room, and leaning a bit on the wall, decided to focus and try to enjoy this as much as she could. The man started reading, and right away she noticed that he has a nice voice too. It was an important thing, and she liked it.
“Separated lives” definitely wasn’t her favorite, but with the way he was reading it, it was better than she remembered. Maybe it was because he knows how to express the emotions he felt when he was creating it, or because the words were coming out of someone else’s mouth instead of her silent reading… she didn’t know, but it was definitely good.
Like every other book he wrote, this one had the juicy parts too, and he always knew the perfect way to make it hot and romantic, without sounding cheap, raw, and dirty. But Caitlin didn’t actually expect him reading those parts out loud, at the event like this.
But it seemed like the rest of the audience was thrilled with it. Some of them had their phones recording, some were sighing, shortly, they all confirmed her earlier thoughts.
And then she noticed him smirking and sending flirty looks every once in a while. Oh, he is a flirt too, she thought and she was unimpressed. But between all that, she could see him glancing at his phone a few times, and almost unnoticeable frowning.
Whatever he saw on the screen of his phone, he didn’t like it, she could tell.
He finished the reading, and he thanked politely before he moved to another table that was set for signing. She saw Iris approaching, and they proceeded to stand in the line.
“Okay, something weird just happened, and I mean, really weird,” Iris whispered to her, careful not to do it too loud and when Caitlin gave her questioned look, she continued. “A woman that was sitting next to me, I accidentally looked at her phone, and she wrote the message ‘I want you.’ And the receiver was HR! But I don’t think he knows her, because he didn’t answer and I could see that she is disappointed, angry or both.” She made a disgusted look on her face before she finished “I mean, how weird is that? And kinda creepy.”
“Thank God I wasn’t there to see that, it was more than enough to see and hear their reactions at certain parts of the book”, was all that Caitlin answered because honestly, she didn’t know what to say to that. Maybe that woman knows him. Maybe that wasn’t his phone number at all. Or maybe he is like that, flirting and chatting with strangers. Or it’s none of that, she couldn’t possibly know. But she did think that maybe seeing that message on his phone made him frown…
As they were coming closer, they could see and hear him talking with the others who gave him the book to sign. He was nice, he was smiling, and he was a little too flirty for her taste, but she decided to wait with her judgment until she actually meets him.
Iris was first and she was like a little girl who met her idol.
“Hi, I’m so happy to finally meet you.” She started and told him her name when he asked her. It seemed like he had something like prepared speech/conversation for this kind of things, but somehow he made everyone feel special even though he was repeating almost the same words to all of them.
“Here you go Iris, and thank you for coming.” He offered her the book, smiling widely.
“I’m sorry, I know this is signing, but, can we take a photo?” Iris tried, not actually believing that he will accept, but he did it almost immediately and Caitlin chuckled, thinking how she will tease Iris forever about this.
She was just about to give him the book, when he turned from Iris and looked her straight in the eyes.
“Hello, where do I sign?” he was still holding her gaze, the smirk was back and he had the pen in his hand, like he was waiting for her to give him something to sign it.
What the hell? Like he expects me to ask him to sign my forearm or my bra, Caitlin thought and got irritated instantly. She placed the book in front of him and answered sharply.
“The book Mr. Wells, and please don’t bother to charm me.” But instead of getting angry, humiliated or just annoyed, he smiled even more and stared at her for a few seconds “Of course, I apologize.” And then he noticed the book she gave him “Hard love, huh?”
“Yes, I like it way more than the ‘Separated lives’ Caitlin was honest like always.
He didn’t ask her anything else except for her name and then he returned the signed book to her.
“It was nice meeting you Caitlin Snow.” She felt a little bit weird, she was the only one being actually cold to him, and he was looking at her like he is fascinated. She offered him just small “Thanks” and proceeded to join Iris.
“Miss Snow, why you don’t like ‘Separated lives’?”, she could hear him asking her while another woman was waiting in front of him.
“First of all, too much drama”, she said, not waiting for his answer and walked away with stunned Iris. But she didn’t see him still staring at the place she was standing with the same fascinated look and the same smile.
He would probably stay like that for a while, but the woman in front of him cleared her throat and he quickly apologized before returning to his duty.
Once Caitlin and iris were out of the bookstore, taking their usual way back home, the latter couldn’t help but ask, “Caitlin?”
“Yeah?”
“What the hell was that?”
“What do you me- oh, you mean with Wells?” Caitlin played fool at the start and then tried to save it somehow.
“Uh-huh,” Iris nodded, “for a second, I thought you are going to punch him or something.”
“I was just being honest. All those ladies in there were all over him, you saw it yourself, you included. And he enjoyed it. I’m not interested to flirt with a writer that I happen to admire, that’s all.” Caitlin said everything almost in one breath, “And like I told you before, I didn’t like ‘Separated lives’. She finished and Iris was staring at her.
“Okay, I wasn’t that bad”, was the only thing Iris answered, and they both burst out laughing, remembering her fangirling from a few minutes ago.
“Noo, at all, ‘Mr. Wells, can we take a photo?’” Caitlin mimicked her and Iris pulled out her phone, looking at the said photo.
“Shut up, I’m gonna frame this.”
Maybe this wasn’t such a bad idea, Caitlin thought. Yes, she got annoyed a bit, but she actually got out and even had some fun and laughter. She won’t forget to thank Iris for this.
That night, after a 20-minute drive, HR opened the door of his spacious loft, located on the highest floor of a flat at one of Central City’s nice neighborhoods.
Discarding his shoes and placing them on the small shelf next to the entrance, he makes his way to the kitchen. Grabbing a glass, he poured himself a rich amount of bourbon and took a sip, letting it slide slowly down his throat, indicating how much he needed this alcoholic beverage.
Walking towards the large window that overlooked the city, he leaned on the wall, and enjoyed the rest of the liquid. He could see the night lights, coming from street lamps, cars and open houses. Some lone people walking on the sidewalk, an old man walking his dog out, all of them with a different story to tell.
He is really good at telling stories himself, that‘s why he could be described as ‘famous writer’.
Since he was young, he was the kid that was better in art lessons. Mathematics and science wasn’t really his thing. Something was telling him that his future would be around the art world and he liked that idea.
Maybe it was rare for a teenage boy, but back in the day, he was writing down his thoughts daily, because he had that inner need to express his feelings, even if it was on a piece of paper.
When he was 17, he had his high school’s entry in a short story competition. And although he didn’t want to participate at first, being afraid of failing dramatically, the result – taking the first award, rewarded his teacher’s words and made him believe that he indeed had some talent in writing.
After attending a few language courses, in order to improve his vocabulary, grammar and syntax, he put together all of his thoughts and released his very first book. The positive reviews it received afterwards made him find his purpose. He is going to be a writer. And it made him feel complete.
Years passed, many more books followed since then, some being a huge success, some others not so. Many meetings with publishers, travels around the world promoting his most recent work, signings at the bookstores, just like today, which left him thinking…
And he was thinking about that Caitlin Snow, who was so different than all those women who came in that bookstore today. She actually commented sincerely on his book, admitting straightly like that that she didn’t enjoy it because ‘it had too much drama’ as she exactly said.
‘Separated lives’ was a book written in a tough for him period of time- his divorce, hence the name of it. His emotional baggage entered a story that was destined to have a happy middle and ending, as his work was somehow having a certain structure.
The truth was that he struggled writing this one, as he lost his inspiration halfway and it was more forced than actually written with his usual enjoyment like previous books in front of the keyboard of his Macbook.
The failure of a marriage wasn’t an easy thing to deal with and it had affected him in many aspects of his life. This last year, he spent in trying to find himself and fill the gaps that this unfortunate event created in him.
Things between him and his wife haven’t been this great for a while before the break-up. If he could ask himself, he wasn’t sure what went wrong. It was like the love faded just like that. Two people stopped having the need to share a bed, or eat together and do whatever a married couple does. He couldn’t explain it.
He tried to find his mistake, whatever that was, since he knew that when something doesn’t work between a couple, the blame isn’t one-sided. His romance novels taught him that very well. He never figured what had gone wrong, and one day he woke up and checked his mail, finding among a few other work related letters, an envelope with divorce papers. And in that moment he knew everything was over.
He didn’t move on ever since, not being ready for a relationship, knowing he failed the most important one he had formed in his life. He might was flirting with the so called ‘fan’ ladies who were coming to meet him, but he never tried to go further than that, he didn’t feel like it. These women were just all over him, typical for men with power, even though in his case was being a well-known author.
And then, there was this girl today, that dragged his attention with her words. He deep inside knew that his book had defects and she really showed up telling him with no hesitation that she didn’t like it. He respected her for that.
The memory of her made him smile a bit, looking down at his glass. If only he could meet her again. Impossible, he thought.
Who knows, maybe fate does better…
To be continued...