Craigslist for Overlords

by candiedrobot (spaghoulie)

Summary:

Melkor's been down on his luck lately. After involuntarily quitting his old job as an orchestra conductor, he finds himself looking for a new place to stay, far away from his meddlesome family. A Craigslist ad seems to hold all the answers, but will his new roommate prove too much of a headache to handle, or will the fiery little welder (and his unusual collection of lizards and ouija boards) end up stealing Melkor's heart?

With guest appearances by long-suffering dad Eru, Mairon's less than savoury friends, some ghosts and a band of brothers that might possibly be the mob, follow Melkor's adventures in life, love, and stolen jewelry.

Notes:

A big thanks to everyone who has been so enthusiastic about this story over on tumblr! You all are the best, and your comments and asks give me life. Follow me on tumblr for headcanons, snippets and general ramblings.

Chapter 1: Prologue

Melkor paused, his mouse hovering over the back button, accustomed as he’d become to bland, uninteresting and unproductive craigslist ads that spoke of white picket fences or fifteen college students crammed into a four bedroom apartment with a broom cupboard for rent.

Melkor had lost his job recently, after an unfortunate incident with his boss, who also happened to be his dad and had reacted rather poorly to his (pretty damn righteous, if he did say so himself) rendition of Swan Lake on opening night. He wasn’t homeless yet, but his house in Utumno wasn’t exactly a secret from his family, and if he had to listen to his father or one of his brothers or sisters beating on his door or shouting at him on the answering machine for one more moment, he was likely to go completely insane. (He honestly could not take another message that consisted of nothing but his sister Nienna crying incessantly. He had even named a very particular kind of migraine after her.)

All search for rentals or roomshares in the area had been completely fruitless, however, until now.

Melkor liked scary movies. And he liked animals too. He certainly wouldn’t mind a cat or a dog running around. And the house looked pretty interesting. Melkor was a sucker for creepy aesthetic, and he would have his own room, a firepit on the balcony, and on-site laundry. And hell, if nothing else, the price was right.

He wasn’t sure if the haunted part was a joke or not, but he’d seen Paranormal Activity and he was pretty sure he could fight a ghost if he had to.

Melkor released the mouse and picked up his phone, dialing the numbers on the screen carefully, a wide grin on his face. There was no way his dad would find him in a haunted house in the middle of Angband. This was perfect. The phone rang a few times and then voicemail picked up,

“Hi you’ve reached Mairon, I’m busy right now, but leave me a message and I’ll get back to you. If this is Pharazôn you need to fucking grow a pair and invest in a therapist, financial advisor or psychic. Leave me alone.”

There was a loud BEEP, and Melkor blinked at the phone, confused for a moment before he gathered his thoughts and began with his message.

“Hi there! You don’t know me, but my name’s Melkor.”