morbing to the beat

by ms_misogyny

Summary:

The Best Fanfiction You'll Ever Read

Chapter 1: Cowbunga

Morbius woke up one day to find that he misplaced his Sherk on VHS. "Morbdarling," he says to you, full body shivering, "what did you do to my VHS of Shrek on ice?" You don't know where he put his Shrek tape and he screams and calls you a liar while doing that quirky dance from The Morbius (2021).
Suddenly, the door to your bedroom opens. "Jungkook from The B.T.S.!" Morbuis exclaims, pumping his fists. "I've waited for you for so long so I could dump this sad sack y/n (your name) and love you!!"
"Morbeanus," Junkook says, "I am with tony stark and other avengers now I can't be with you."
"Jungkook from the B.T..S. I love you what do you mean i'd dump this pillow warmer for you any day I'll become averger for you <3"
"No Morbinus," jUnkook slams his fist down on his knee and leaves the room. You pat Morebeas on the shoulder.
"I have five thousand quantillion morbillion dollars what doesn't he see in me," Morbest cries, tears streamingdown his vampire face, "Jungkook and I are made for each other and you wouldn't get it."
"Actually Morb-senpai I--"
"Silence!!!" Morbino wails, throwing his Shrke VHS across the room and it shatters to a trillion morbillion pieces, "my pain is too great for me to bear. I must...I must..."
"No!" you summersault out of bed, pointing a long, gangly finger at Morbo, "don't do it!!!!!1"
"I'ts morben time,"
Suddenly, Mobro stops moving, "is that Sam Winchest?"
"Uhh yes it is," Samuael says, a large wOoden dagger in hand, "check this out," and Sameanl stabs the Morv in the heart and he dies.
"Why would you kill morbiny!" you have tears streaming down your cheeks, "he did nothing wrong he was just being quirky"
"Morbinary would have killed you if he morbed too close to you," Sam whispered seductively, "I saved you,"
But then the ashes of morbunary spun around and it looks like he might resurrect who knows fuck

Chapter 2: God's Anthropocene

The funeral for mr. mOrb was on his birthday which was poetic in the way that a poem rhymes or something.
You cry and cry and your tears stain your mcr shirt cause you're a disappointment to your parents before samnael wincent pats your shoulder in the most patronizing way possible. You glare at the guy and he just does it again and you cry a little more.
"Samndeal, I dunno how much more I can take of this tortuer," a tear streaks toilet-cleaner blue down ur cheeks. "me morbie is gone ooohenngooood boohgoooo (a/n (author note)this is u crying)."
"that's not my name i'm dean," saMmie says.
"i thought morbinnie would un-un-alive himself and spring forth into this world anew, bright and bushy-tailed, ready to take upon life's cruelties with grace and fervor." You ball (haha ball) your fists. "Instead he just fucking died."
"i know, lame," sardine giggles.
"if only geraldd leto were here to take his place or something."
Sargento shakes his stupid head. "Who the fuck is Jerad kEto?"
"It is I, Morpenus!" jeremy renner screams, jumping up on morpiss's asymmetrical coffin. "I am alive ahhdhhdhhhddss jahahhhhd (a//n (author not) this is laughing)"
Jerald Meta jumps down from the coffin and knocks it over, spilling out the dust that is Morpius. You scream and cry and shake but it is no use the dust flies away in the wind like things that are light (as in not heavy( in the wind . physics or chemistry or smth carries away the last remanents of morbi into the heavens
You punch Jermanyy in the face while Sangria runs away,
"my beautiful y/n i would never mean to hurt you like Morbituary did," Jersey Cheeto cries, "i will treat you right i am sorry i skitter scattered your bf's ashes oops :,("
you Forgive Gerbil immediately cause why not and you run off into the sunsetaway from the funeral progressions that are still ongoing.
meanwhile Ssamal whispers to his friend something menacing and plot-enhancing but idk what it is yet but it's suspicious !
"Yes, good sharpay," eEren Yeager says, "very good. all according to plan muhahahadah (laughing but emo-y ;) (

Notes:

https://youtu.be/9nz55mGQEd0

Chapter 3: Call Me Ishmael

Erwin Jaywalker told his lackey to get him his eyeliner so he could brood in the mrriro and cry about "mick ass yuh" or what ever and told samnfja it was in the bathroom or whatervr idc
Sam Smith went to get the maybaline eye stick form the backrooms when they saw a shadow in front ofnhim (cue "I see shadows in my room " song thing ))
"Holy shit is that uh is that honky shit it's uh uh oh my gosh it's wow it's hubbah hubba is that woah holy moly e that's ugh wow 😲😲😲😲😲 bearded Christopher Evans."
"My name is actually chri--"
You already used that bit in the last fucking chapter stfu
YOU shut up you aren't even writing this
"Bearded Chris Evans wow wow honk bdonk that's crazy wow."
"Whatever I'm here to talk to irene skinwalker do you know where Errand is??"
"no but you can ask that useless lesbian over there
see how I integrated some of the tags oooh yes yes comment "I got the joke" I'd you jot the joke ;)
mick ass yuh perked her head up at Ham's comment 'im not the useless one but i will comply what does the beardless crisis want??/
"i want ernest yardwork to talk to him about my evil plan to kill the morbeast"
"As a useful leabion I will tell you he is sulking in the basement"
"oh shizzlesticks I was just there" said Ham Samwich "you didn't need this useless lennon anyways I could have led you there how goofy how quirky of me ehehehehehehehehherh."
Bearded Chris Evans nodded to mick ass yuh in solidarity (he too was a useless lesbian) and followed Serenity to the basement to see the Earwig!"
Now bearded Chris Evan and Emo talked about k***ing morphius and jeraed (every kiss begins with k) and y/n are off in the distance selebratung their bond, unknowing what beholds of them in the future 😱 holybshitttttt!!!!!!!!!

Notes:

Psychoanalyze me

Chapter 4: A Zebra Does Not Change Its Spots

Fluttering rapidly, Armin's eyelids shoot open, the outer corners of his eyelashes sticking together stubbornly with sleep. Armin squinted blearily, head heavy from dehydration and his bangs glued to his forehead from the night sweat he shed. He had awoken, it seemed, to an arm snaking across his torso. The offending arm began to tighten in the seconds that started to pass since Armin's sudden departure from his dreams.

Utterly delicate, as best he could manage, Armin wriggled free from the vice grip around his body, gently un-wedging the arm's fist jammed beneath his ribs and the mattress. A gentle finger ran across the freed clenched hand before Armin pulled away, tucking his own hands across his body as he retreated to the toilets. He relieved himself, later finding use in the kitchen, making himself busy by scrubbing together bits of a meal he hoped his lover would appreciate with him in the early hours of the day.

Cereal, milk, bowl. Bacon, eggs, pan. On the counter, he assembled enough food to sustain himself and the body warming his bed. He twisted the knob on the stove to his liking, setting the frying pan gingerly on the warmed burner, careful to avoid the clatter of the two metals that would surely disturb the peace of the early Sunday morning.

Kneading his hands together, Armin hoped that the scent of cooking meat and the crackle in the heated pan would awaken Jared. His Jared, Armin thought with a smile. It had not been long since he had first met Jared Leto, but Armin figured that if love was as true as his books had made it, surely the thrum of his heart validated the warmth in his face every time his thoughts wandered to Jared.

 

Y/N...no. No, that was not quite right. Armin was happy. Happier than he ever had been in his life. Happier than when he read his first favorite book. Happier than when he first met his best friends. Happier than Jared Leto whenever he thinks of a new way to take his method acting too far. Jared completed Armin the way that peanut butter and the jar it comes in do, I guess. Like Kim and Kanye, but better, he thought.

Obtusely, Armin wondered if Jared was a mirage. He was too perfect, too complementary to his soul that it almost seemed too good to be true. Maybe Jared was a hallucination, a pipe dream of sorts only the saddest of men could imagine. Maybe his childhood best friend, Eren Yeager, gaslit him into having an imaginary partner again. No, no, Armin thought, Jared seemed so much more real than Annie had ever appeared. Plus, Eren promised to never do that again; he had sworn he would only emotionally manipulate his own father going forward.

Untangling his fingers, Armin flipped the bacon over in the pan. Even if doubts clouded his mind, he was still acutely aware of how much joy had nestled in the grooves of his bones since Jared crashed into his life. Crashed into his apartment. Crashed Morbius' funeral. By no means was he a replacement for what Morbius was in his life, but. But...he was an improvement. A gold sticker that patched up the tear in his heart. Annie would have told him, "You can't keep burying your trauma by covering it up with things that just make you happy for the moment." Armin would always say back, "You're not real." Armin brushed the thought away...it was too early to be thinking about "could haves" and "what ifs."

 

Mornings, or morning weekends, it would seem, would not deter visitors from knocking on Armin's door. Frowning at the knock on the door, Armin rose from the stool he sat by the kitchen counter and snapped the stove's heat to "off." He was quick to swing the door to his apartment open to cease the incessant knocks that echoed in the morning air.

One hand hovering, balled in a fist, and the other supporting his weight against the doorframe, Eren looked up from where he previously was worrying the tip of his Doc Martins into the protruding corner of the door sweep. A sheepish grin overtook the surprise Armin inflicted upon him when he swung the door open. "Hey, buddy, how are you doing?" Eren pushed himself from the doorframe, clearing his throat. Eren suddenly found no interest in eye contact, raking his eyes down the beige paint of the old building's second-floor hallway. Tugging at the collar of his ratty, midnight-painted wife-beater, Eren pinched his lips together before releasing a put-out sigh. "I heard Morbius...died. A few days ago. The funeral, Armin..." Eren let the silence fill the space between him and his friend.

Right. The funeral. Morbius' burial was yesterday. Time was passing so slowly for Armin. He mourned, he cried, he lived. He moved on. He found love, at Morbius' funeral, no less. Jared Leto might look exactly like Morbius and might have unconventionally spread Morbius' ashes, but Armin saw no issue with yesterday's events. It was endearing, how much Jared had wanted to prove his sudden love for Y/N no no that's not right it it it it's Armin, Jared had a sudden love for Armin.

Blushing, Armin tucked his hands into the insides of his elbows. "Thanks for the...well wishes." Armin tucked a stray longer strand of his bangs behind his ear. He cut his hair a few years back, but suddenly he missed his old yee yee ass--bob. Haircut. So he could hide his reddened cheeks from his friend. Armin sighed, letting his hand fall from his cheekbone. "I am doing ok, though. Thanks for checking in, really, but I'm doing pretty well. I think Morbius is at peace."

Instead of giving him a patronizing smile, like Armin had expected, Eren tilted his head down instead. "I actually wanted to talk to you about the funeral." Eren leaned back, cupping his hand around the nape of his neck. "I, well. Me being here now, this isn't really a condolences type of visit, no offense." Eren stripped his gaze away from the chipped paint of the doorframe and sought solace in the troubled blue of Armin's eyes. "I came to ask about who showed up. The guy that knocked over Morbius' casket," Armin worried his lip as Eren sucked in a breath, "I need to know if you know him. Who he is, what he does for a living. Anything. This..." the corners of Eren's mouth tugged in the direction of the floorboards. "A friend of mine, you know him, Sam Winchester. I asked him to--"

Underwear-clad, barreling through the bedroom doorway and into the kitchen-living room, Jared Leto let out a pleased holler. Eren paled, black-painted nails twitching at his hip, as Jared cried happily, "It smells so wonderful in here Your Name! Is that bacon or--oh, who's that, Morbdarling?"

Samuel Winchester, it seemed, had some explaining to do.

Notes:

The chapter name references my favorite musician, Al Gore.

Chapter 5: Society

meanwile, back at eren's layer, mikasa is with her girlfriend who just came back from sapace holy shit!

 

asuka (pictru reference) just came back from her pioleted space adventure in her robot thing from the neon Generous eVangelican after kawru was brutally murdered for the morbillionth time but fans are useed to it now .

(note form author : it says mikasa/sasha in tags but its now mikasa/asuka now cause i don't feel like changing it (

 

"oh asuka i have waited so long for you are return we should sement our love with a kiss"

"yes mikes we should i love u more than i love yelling at shingi" Then the two kiss awwee 

suddenly, a loud BOOOM came from the window and asuka said sh*it in german and so did mikasa (i forgor they both probably know german wow!)

 

"it's an enemy stand!!!" said asuka but mikasa looked at her sideways (this means she thought she was being in a silly goofy mood )

"no it isnt look out windo"

 

it seemed, out of no wear, goku had appeared outsiide!! he says (look below @image )

asska cries tears of joy "that's the most inspirational thing ive ever seen oh wow"

 

goku explodes into a morbillion sparks but as hes dieying he says "do not trust jerald leto he is sussy" i swear goku totally would have said that

asuki was shocked & looked to mikas for comfort but was met with a hard look. "this is an omen i think eren was right we must destroy the last rememenents of the morbis before it is too late"

 

aska nodded in tandem "yes bae we shuld if we want to save the world we must destroy Morbius (2021)"

but why is the world going to explode like goku did if the morbi is not killed? TO BE CONTINUED ->

Notes:

EASTER EGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!

in chapter 4 (four) the first (1st) letter of each paragraph spells out "f*uck you morbius" ;)

Chapter 6: The 10%

watch to gain a morbillion brain cells

Notes:

i'm singlehandedly trying to prove sturgeon's law is real

 

credit to edenoi on tumblr

Chapter 7: Tom Cruise Scares Me

Jimin waled into the B.T.S room ( called a "'"green"'" room for those of u who dont know the show biz hehe) to see his friend jUngkooK criss-cross-apple-sauce on one of the couches.

:"Junkgoo," jimin swaggered into the room, 'my man how's it hangng dawg?"

"Nothing much bestie," junkrat sang, "ya know, in a polyanamrous relationship(s)(?) with the Avenger team/ what it do" [refer to first chapter if ur confused [

"sigh I'll never find love" the jimin cries, "not like u junkook i am insipired by ou and your dedication to teh craft dayumn" jimin's face contorts into a frown that looks like this -> :(

"oh boy oh boy do i have a surprise for you j"ungkook delightfully crows "i have the perfect mans for you would you want to date him'

"sure i dont even need to see him whois it??"

"hot dog hot dog hot diggity dog heuh heuh!!!!!!!!" a cartoonish voice wails

"is that--!1j1j!!!"

"7es my jimin friend its micky mouse!!!!"

"omg i feel like im on oprah this is the best day of my life thank you judas "

"no probs my bestie foreverz" then jugnkook bursts into a trillion quantillion morbillion sparks (this is how he leaves rooms)

"ooh toodles," Micey mouse waves to his new love interest, "hot dog!"

"is that all you can say u fu*cking mouse??!!"

"oh gowrsh thats--"

the Jimin slams the rat against the wall. "Iknow what u are. a rat, no mouse"

"i am a mouse its literally my name"

"you are nothing but a spy," Jim in spits, "you know I'm pro #morbiussweep and you've come to take ur revenge"

"you are correct Jimin from the B.T.S., " the mickey sighs, defeated. "Bearded Chris Evans contacted me to take out every morbius supporter. Bearded Chris Evans knew about youthrough Jungkook from the BT.S. I'm sorry it had to be this way.."

"You'll never take me alive you stinky mouse," Jimin pounds a fist against his sternum in triunph "i will be a MorbBro till the day i take my last breath,' '

Ratatewey took a sharp breath, his eyes going anime-mode,, "if it must be this way,' and assumed a fighting position (use ur imagenation). " oh toodles, my love"

Notes:

i had to look up "mickey mouse noises"

Chapter 8: They Turned Me Into a Pronoun

Jungtook invertedly exploded into a quintillion quantillion garbanzobillion BTSillion junkratmillion peaces (this means he was put back together) after seeing his bae (the jim) with the disnry miouse . it made lOud boom noise like this:: BOOM!! tone stark saw this form the corner of his robot eye sideeye like (louod noises bring back his ptSd of being blown up after the end of the iron men 4 (he died but jungkook resurrectid him with his jungkoook powers) ) he was sus picious!
"oh it is u my jungkrok <3" said rigatoni he was no longer sus
"jungook is home omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" said black window (she was alive because of the )
captin america gave a salute to the jungkook and so did hakeye because he is unoriginal,
thork was so happy to see his bestie he knocked over his giant mighty tool thing and it crashed into the table and the table didnt break but it bounced all over the room before shattering like jungkook does whenever he elaves rooms
"the bts is home holy shit i love the bts" this was said by hulk (he was cheating on all of them).
"my loves oh how i missued u in the nine minutes i was gone ;) "
"johnkook something happened u might want to see this," said thrak h showed him a tablet but it cracked and nearly shattered by the junkroot snatched (slay) the glass up and looked at it with his eyes
"oh my jimminy crickets this is crazy oh wow," jankort cried his cristal clear tears running down his bts face, "what will we do now??"
"we must persist junkook dw the rating s will go down u will see :)" this was hulk (he was still cheating on them(
black noir sjook her head "we need to take them down!!! call eren he willknow what to do it is time jukook!!!"
"no we shall wait this one out this requires time and patents "
the metallic man gave a pathetic weak stupid ugly thumbs up like a fucking idiot.
the American boy did the same but it was less stupid and dumbn like regitoni >:(
the others did different variations fo this but i want to end thic chapter
"good very good" the jung said, "suit up babes we have a vampie to brutally murder'

Notes:

i bought 8 quarts of dirt at target yesterday

Chapter 9: 47.5706° N, 53.5556° W

bearded christopehr evan (my favorite lesbian recurring chaeracter :) ) stood in the doorway of the lay er of eren and pointed to the phone hewas holding (in his left and to be specfific))))

"Th e Beard," belloweed the eren "what the fuck do u want bestie"
"it is impotent my baefee," beard muttered,. "it happened again.d,,."
"odhn nooo that suck s boohooo" ernest cried his ernest tears
"it is ok" beard lied "i lied" beard spoke truth

|"tell it 2 me str8 " what is happenin"

"ok, beard voice shook liek he was crying or something, "moribino is surpassign box office movies yet again he cant keep getting away with this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"even more than the gru movie "
"yes thork couoldnt believe ehs 3yes it was so shocking he made shock face like the emoji but irl 1"

"impossible we have to kill the mrob its the onlyway"

this is the plot of the story if u made it this far
now we're in the endgame teehee

"but first i mist convine with my lesbian besties,' chrisis says, "to assska and mikassssa i guees'

Notes:

ive never been to canadia

Chapter 10: Reigen Arataka is a Hustler's University Graduate

the bxarded Chris and the ere garther the mikasa and the asska together an convine in one group.

"what is wrong o bnother o mine and fellow leabian ?| miskasa sweetly spat.

"nothing marko except our doom is upon us.." ren said.

 

aska and mikaska looked at each other in the solidarity. "we had a vision from the prophet Goku about this very thing" said arkansas

Earnin and Christopher shared a look as well (they were not in a gay relationship, however; ernen respected the chris sexuality ) "similarly we did too the goku came to us and did a quirky sill y dance it looked liek the one the morbo would do !!!" this was the eren talking.

 

 

It looked like this below (WARNING: DRIPPY!!!!!!!!!!)

the chris said to the other 3, "before he tragically exploded, he said one thing: they will strike in Briish land. whot do you think he meant by that??????"

"eazey peasie, " asks announced, "we will ride in my spaceship thing to the lkdand of eng!!!!!!!!!!"

 

----they did that WHOOSH the space ship wnet fast (look below at aska piloting ship\!!!!!!!!-------

---

 

they arive in dutchland (fany word for eng land) and get out of the space shit and go up to the bunkham place 

"wow this is a large military camp that is carazy" the Beard declared

"we are here because the entitty GOKU told us to so we may kill the MORBB. it is the only way to serve.....": eron tooka  breath"..them"

 

"what do u mean onichan??" mike said, "who are they?? i thought it was because morbo was inherently evil that we shall strikith him from this fallow land???"

"No you idiot," ervin cried, "it is for those to which we serve. the gods we grant haven on this ground. the...!!!"

 

"..MINIONS!!!!!" CHRISTOPEHR SAid loudly. 

 

in from the palace stood a trillion morbillion minions, crying wth GLEE (i know lea can't read this so I'll just say it, Glee was mid tbh)// They all stood around staring up at the large balcony from the above!

the minons started to cheer and jeer at the balcony,,,and out came queen lizzy!!"

 

" i have a bad feeling about this said aska

"ell me about it baby," mic said

from the corner of his eye, chris saw something STARTLING and he yelled out "NOOOO!!!!!2K"

 

he saw THIS BELOW A MINION WITH GUN!!!

a shont rang out!! then a GASP RANg out through the area followed by cheers of the minions..

 

'the,,lthe minion!!!! it k*lled the queen!!!" 

erin looked up in horor, it was tru that the quen was dead and it was because of a minon from the minon movie!!!!

 

"we were on the wrong sid e of history after alllll," erie cried solumnly 

 

from the balcony, a new enemy appeared! He declared himself,,, king bob!!!"

this is him

---

 

 

over the tears of the four losers and the joyous cried of the minions, came two figures dressed in black!!!!kjld

one was the armin! and the other...........................MORBIUS\

 

Well, not the mOrbius, but JERARD LENTIL!1!

"this has gone too far!!" tears went down the morb face, "now monarchs have fallen!! society is corrupt for taking down dictators!!!"

 

"Jerad! No!" cried Armin. "You have so much to live for, so much to accomplish! A life...with me!"

"no armpit," the lento said, "i must make peace myself, with my own morbing!!"

 

He let out a battle cry like below!!!!

 

 

~~~~~~stay turned for the mystery! the murder! the,,,the morbing is upon us!!!

 

Notes:

i had a fever a few days ago and when i woke up the queen was dead :(
i can't believe i missed it :,((

Chapter 11: YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD KILL ME

Summary:

the truth of life

morpan looked to the pornflower blue skie and let out a bellowin g cry to the heaven "i moreginus shall slay 💅 thine dasterly demons!!"

 

"Morbius, no!" Armin clutched to Morbius' arm, shaking him gently so he may turn his gaze to his lover. "You mustn't. Think...think of our child..."

 

ernest frowned "woah woah woah like good for you bbut what the fuck don't you both know each other like a little like four maybe five days?"

"Doesn't matter," Armin waved off his friend's protests. "Skill issue on your end for not getting any bitches yet."

 

"yeah dear bother of mine," said mick ass yuh , "i even got bithes hell yea "

[Lorum ipsum] mordingus lifted a single hand, his crusty palms flaking with a saw-dust-like powder. it could be cocaine, reader, do not judge.. "i morpansexual will ensure these MININS are KILLED with my VAMPIRIC POWERS and CUNTY PERSONA."

 

this is what the morepenis looked like when he said that thing

 

suddenly, with the power of gonku, the avergers invert explosion with the jankook. it was a miracle!

 

"wait justin," tony-the-balogne said to his one of many lovers, "we are here for a mission, to bakc up the mining army!"

"smooth like butter," jungkook explained!

 

steve rongers and bearded chris did not look at each other (they were only dopplegangers and were unrelated(

"we are here to stop you!!" cried thorr. "this is maddness! against the mighty thousands of minions, you stand no chance!!"

 

"oh shaddup ya winey wanker," said asuka, who was suddenly Scottish. "wee had enuff of yous speakin on this bloody subject!"

"enough! " cried a new voice, one askua had never heard. "it is i, jimin, and my trusty mouse micky," he had somehow teleported with the avengers and jungook!

 

"you...you rode on my shirttails while i teleported,!" junkdook cried with glee and amazement, "how??"

"nevermind these silly plotholes! jimin said "we are here in support of morbituary!!"

 

junkgook, the avengers, and chrisis beard all gasped," you converted micky!! he was our best soldier..

"no mind," mickey said. he had a deep country twang "I'm a changed rat "

"grr" grred chris beard, "how could you!!" 

 

the lesbians looked over at the beard., then to even. "but, now that you've seen the evil power of the minion, you know we must team up with the morpiss to eliminate this threat!" they both said this in unison......

"ok," said eren. he was easily convinced.

 

  bearded chrisis, dless so. "how could you\!! this is not how it was supposed to go!"

jimin bravely pounded is fist to his chest, "morbius is life, morbius is love! we must give jerad lenril a chance!! he will save us all!!"

 

the avengers quickly changed sides. forced into a corner, so did junkok. the lesbiands nodded in solidar ity  and christ bear pouted but agreed. eren was staring at his doc martins. mickey let out a sad "huck huck" and jimin patted his rat head.

 

Armin frowned as he gazed into Jersey's eyes. "You know there's no coming back from this, right?"

Germany nodded. "i know the consenqunces for serving my zoolander-style cunty morbiu stare..it could destroy me.."

 

Armin sighed, shook his head, and patted Mordius' chest. "I'll support you and be by your side no matter what. But I don't want to lose you again."

 

 

"i must do..what i was meant to do,"

and he hit him with that yassified arrested trump face card

all the minions...you guessed it....

EXPLODED

 

all of the ruckus caused the briish citizens to cheer. destruction!!

 

but...not armin and morediss!!

morbijesus was..dying....

"My love Morbius," Armin sighed. "To think you'd become a martyr..."

 

 

"my life is undyibng...only in body and mind shall i pass.."

"Yeah." Armin said.

"i will forever love you"

"Ok."

"...but i will die and that will also be forever.."

"Ye-"

"i'll always be with you"

"-ah. Uh huh."

then they share d a smoochie 

and maopinus dyies. trajically. 

-----

mickassuyh and her aska would become private investigators as well as start up a new goku worship center in england.

asuka's spaceshift thing would blow up into several pieces.l

since lesbians cannot die they became immortal

 

mikie mouse and jimin would wed in a vegas-style wedding exactly four days after the eNgland incident. junkook would cut all ties with jimin because he was no longer in support of the union. the two were married for 82 years before both running out of oxygen at the same exact moment.

jungkook's relationship with the avengers would not last. it turns out hawkeye was wanted for several homicides in northern canada, tony was indicted for tax fraud and black widow was guilty of being a woman, so the polycule fell apart. the hulk would continue to cheat on all of his significant others with his side piece

 

bearded chris evans would become the biggest supporter of the goku church. he would later train under the blade to become a master swordsman to protect the world against minions. he would die tragically in a blender-related inciddent.

 

erin yeager would spend his remaining days in his basement doing fuck all. he tragically has yet to get sum bitches..

Armin would later start an MLM.

 

morbius and jerod lentil (morbius this chapter) were laid (*smirks*) to rest. rip in peace kings..

the queen is still dead.. for now

 

FIN

 

 

Notes:

goot morning

happy one year anniversary to the last time i updated this

thanks for waiting

goot night

Notes:

Yes I've seen the movie a morbillion times don't tell me "you don't know the plot"

Smash that kudos if you think this was horrible maybe I'll update it