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Dinner was promptly at seven, served personally by Roach to the captains and the first mate. The whole ship knew that tonight was a special occasion; they'd dropped anchor in the middle of the ocean especially for peace and quiet. The crew had already drawn their watches and the ship was quiet. Inside the cabin, the windows were open, gauzy curtains fluttering in the sea breeze.
Izzy, Edward, and Stede sat together around the table, and once Roach had served them and left them alone, Stede poured wine while Izzy dished up the delicious food. "It's been a year, officially," Stede toasted his partners. "To be perfectly honest, I thought Izzy would have killed me by now," he teased, and even Izzy smiled.
"Year's not over yet," is all he said.
Ed reached out and grabbed Izzy's shoulder. "You're where you belong, Iz."
"Am I, though?" It slipped out before he could stop it.
Ed froze, staring at Izzy, and Stede's expression had crumpled sadly. "What do you mean, Izzy?"
"You're making such a big to-do about this, but what happens when you get tired of this?"
"Of this?" Stede still looked crushed. "Do you mean, of you being with us?"
Izzy just looked down at the plate in front of him.
"You think we're tired of you?" Ed lightened his grip on Izzy's shoulder, but didn't let him go. "What's going on, mate? What's the thinking?"
"Izzy? Please talk to us. Please tell us what we've done to make you say that, or even think that," Stede asked softly.
Izzy flinched at Stede's soft words, despising the sadness and the fact that he's the one who put it there. "You didn't, Stede, all right? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything, it just slipped out. I wasn't thinking--"
"Hush, darling," Stede murmured, pushing the table out of the way so he and Edward could sit close to Izzy. "No more of that now, just talk to us." Reaching out, he brushed a lock of hair back in place.
"Iz, please."
Izzy just shook his head. "It's fine, Edward, I shouldn't have said anything."
"Izzy." Stede leaned forward to angle himself directly into Izzy's vision. "Remember what we all promised? We talk things over and we don't let things fester, right?"
"Yeah," Izzy echoed. "We talk it through as a crew."
"Yes, please." Ed rubbed his hand on Izzy's shoulder.
Izzy couldn't stand the way his lovers were looking at him. "It's just. It's you and Stede, okay? I'm not complaining, I'm lucky enough to be part of this, but what happens when you get tired of sharing with me? Stede, you know, don't you? You only accepted me because of Edward and as much as you love him, he loves you. And then you know, don't you, that you're going to realize that you don't need me to be happy, not when you have Ed and he's got you."
Ed was puzzled, but Stede nodded like he understood. "I think I understand the equation. Izzy, you see it as a single unit, Ed-and-Stede, with the addition of Izzy, yes?"
A miserable nod.
"When in reality, it is a single three-man line, Ed plus Stede plus Izzy equally," Stede finished. "What I don't think you understand is, we are like a table. You, Ed, and myself, we are the legs of a stool. We all support each other, and without one part, we all fail. It's all of us, Israel. Not two plus one."
"And we're going to prove to you just how much you belong to both of us."
"We're going to prove that you are mine, and you are Edward's, and that both of us belong to you." Stede put his hand on Izzy's cheek, and Izzy closed his eyes and pressed into the touch. "How about we forget about dinner and get in bed?"
"You still want me after tonight?"
"Hell yeah, mate," was Ed's answer.
"Of course we do, my dearest." Stede and Ed both stood up and drew Izzy towards the huge bed they shared.
Three days later, just as his shift ended, Izzy was stopped by Edward's grip on his shoulder. "Iz, hey, come to the cabin after you clean up, okay?"
Izzy got to the cabin and let himself in. To his surprise, he was alone with Edward. "Captain? Edward?"
"Iz, would you like to stay with me tonight?" he asked, voice roughly. "I got cards, whiskey and rum, and Fang and Ivan on call for dice and bullshitting."
"Where's Stede?" Izzy asked, looking around.
"Stede's on watch tonight, it's just you and me, if you're interested."
Izzy sat at the table, fingering the deck of cards. "You're sure it's okay for me to be here?"
"Of course it's okay." Ed squeezed the back of Izzy's neck. "If you feel weird about it or whatever, you don't have to. I want you here, but you have to be comfortable."
"I want to be here," Izzy answered.
Ed's face broke in a grin, and he straddled the chair across from Izzy. "Then deal, man, deal!"
"And what are we betting with?"
Ed threw a bag onto the table, and Izzy opened it up to reveal a familiar pile of gold pieces, worn and dark with age. "Same as always."
Izzy divided the coins into two piles. "Can't believe you brought them."
"Can't believe you thought I wouldn't." Ed pulled his share of the coins over. "Winner still gets a blowjob from the loser?"
"Sure, if you think you can win." Izzy started dealing, and Ed poured drinks.
Just two hours later, Ed folds a full house. Izzy had been kicking his ass all night because Ed had almost forgotten what a card sharp Izzy was.
And he hadn't even cheated. Not to mention that Izzy had kept his mind on the game and Ed had not. They had talked, bullshit and reminiscing, until an hour and a bottle of rum had passed between them.
Then Izzy had asked for wine. Ed nearly tripped over his feet to get it, because Izzy asked for something. Sure, it was small and easy, the bottle was right there by the brandy.
But he'd asked, and Ed was over the moon.
And then Izzy had asked him why me, Edward, why this worn out sack when you have a fancy dandy who'll never lose their shine?
Because I love you. Iz, you are a part of me, my right arm, my leg, maybe the blood, I don't know. But it's a part I can't be without. And I don't want to try.
Whether that satisfied Izzy, or just gave him something to think about, he changed the subject and went back to the game.
Ed's first winning hand comes along an hour later, and he folds it, aces over fours. There is one coin left in Edward's stack, and with casual deliberance he flipped it to land atop of Izzy's pile. "Looks like you win, mate."
Izzy scooped the coins back into the bag. "It doesn't count if you let me win. You've been distracted all night."
Ed caught Izzy's wrists. "By you. Us. Like this, Ed and Iz, like we're meant to be. You're distracting to me because I keep thinking about the, the, the taste of your sweat on the nape of your neck, it's like licking sunshine and salt. And your hands, shuffling and dealing, and I want to feel them in my hair. Yanking, dragging, giving me what what you want me to have, and Izzy, goddamn, I know you would and always do give me everything." Ed's thumbs rub over Izzy's pulse, feeling the thundering under the skin. "I want to be on my knees in front of you, can't you let me do that? Please let me give you something, some bit of what I feel cause I'm running out of words. These are the best I've got, and I'm sorry about that."
Izzy wanted to break away, to run and drag Stede back down here, shove them together so that Edward would have someone worthy of everything. He almost felt like he couldn't breathe, and as much as he wanted to tear away and run, Ed's touch holding his wrists was the only thing that kept him tethered. "You don't have to keep asking, Edward, everything is already yours anyway, has been when I pledged as your first mate. Gave it to you that day to do what you wanted, to make me into any shape you need."
"I just need my Izzy." Ed picked Izzy up out of the chair and carried him to the edge of the bed, carefully favoring his knee. "Get undressed, I just really need to have you close right now."
Izzy would not pass up the chance to stay in with Edward, even after all this time it felt like the first time he had been asked to stay. He yanked his clothes hard enough to tear them in his haste to get them off and pressed his naked skin against Edward's. Edward drew Izzy into him, curling up in a tight ball and doing his absolute best to ensure that not an inch of Izzy's skin remained untouched. "Iz, I'm not asking, because you'll take it for an order. But, yeah, I'd like tell you that I love you, and I hope you feel the same, and maybe, when you feel that I love you for you, you could maybe tell me."
Izzy felt Edward wrapped all around him, and thought maybe he understood what Ed was asking.
Ed dozed, with Izzy sandwiched between his limbs.
Izzy dozed, too, in his large, Ed-shaped cocoon. He'd been half-listening for trouble, but he'd fallen asleep at some point because he was awakened by Edward's prick pressed against the curve of his ass.
Izzy reached behind himself, stroking Ed's cock and slicking his fist.
Warm, gentle hands stopped the stroking. "Mmmno," came the half-asleep grunt. "Owe you a blowjob, Iz, soon as we wake up."
"But," is all Izzy got out before Ed moved his hand.
"No buts. Want to come with you inside me."
Blood roared in Izzy's ears so loudly he shuddered. Only Stede had ever been given the privilege of fucking Edward, and now Edward was saving his orgasm for Izzy to fuck him through.
"Okay." Ed had linked their sticky fingers, and Izzy brought them up to his chest.
For Izzy, waking up to the moonlight and waves through the open window is incredibly disorienting.
No more so than finding Ed between his legs with Izzy's hard cock resting on his tongue, balls warm in Edward's palm.
Was the warm slurping what woke him? Ed's chin rested on his hip, peering up impishly. "Hey, didn't mean to wake you up, but you were so hard, I couldn't help myself."
Oh, so he's dreaming. He recognized that dream, slid his hands into Ed's hair. "You're fine, Edward, get back to work."
"Yes, sir." Ed's mouth latched onto Izzy's cock and began sucking in earnest.
Izzy's fingers threaded through Ed's hair, pulling it away from his face so that he could watch his cock slipping into and out of Edward's mouth.
Groaning softly, he tugged on Ed's hair to speed him up. "C'mon, Ed, please."
Ed flashed a feral grin as he licked swollen lips. "Told you Iz, you're going to fuck me, want to feel your come in my ass when you stroke me off."
Izzy sat fully upright, fucking hell, this was not a dream! "Edward, are you sure you don't want me to get Stede?"
"I'm sure. I want you, Izzy. Been wanting, didn't know how to ask. Told Stede, and he called me ten kinds of idiot and told me, *Edward, you love him, just say you want him to take you!* So I'm asking, would you fuck me? If you don't want to, that's--"
Izzy shut him up with a kiss, heavy with tongue and teeth. "He's right, you're a fucking idiot," he panted desperately into Ed's mouth.
And then Edward was laughing, his fist wrapping around Izzy’s cock and slicking it with oil Izzy hadn't even noticed. "An idiot for you," Edward agreed, letting Izzy go and rolling onto his belly. Izzy grasped the glass vial that rolled and tinkled in the sheets, wrenching the lid off and coating his fingers. Capping it took forever, and Izzy dropped it back in the sheets half-sealed.
Ed was waiting for him, and Izzy fisted one hand in the bedding for balance as he carefully breached Ed's opening with a single finger.
He was already loose and Edward was smirking over his shoulder. "Meant to ride you while you were sleeping, wake you up balls deep and begging for more."
Izzy stroked his cock, slicking it again with his fingers. "Maybe next time," he grunted out as he rested the head of his prick against Edward's hole. "Edward--"
Ed's back arched as he pulled up to his knees and swallowing Izzy’s cock into his body. "Just fuck me, Izzy, I know it's you, I want you, please move, God, fuck, please!"
Izzy's entire being resisted hearing Edward beg for anything. His hand let go of the bedding and grabbed Ed's hip instead. His other hand moved to Ed's shoulder and squeezed bruisingly hard as he thrust his hips forward.
At the firm grip and the rough thrusts of Izzy's cock, Ed's head fell, chin resting on his chest. Pressing back against Izzy meant spreading his legs wider and lifting his ass, and Izzy’s nails raked over his hip. "Fuck, so good, Iz, feels so good, don't stop," he babbled, hands scrabbling for leverage against the headboard.
Ed crying out Izzy's name, calling him good, praising him only pushed him harder, cock withdrawing to the tip, and then pressing deeply in battering strokes that rattled Izzy's teeth.
He could see Ed sweating, feel it over his skin as he draped across Ed's back. Harsh, panting breaths were all he could draw, nothing but the smell of two bodies fucking filled the air and Izzy drew it into his lungs.
"Touch me, please," Ed begged, feeling blindly for Izzy's hand. Izzy met Edward's questing fingers with his own, and Ed brought him down to the hard cock that throbbed under the lightest brush.
Izzy wrapped his hand around the hard length, and felt Ed's muscles squeeze him ruthlessly.
Nearly spending right then, Izzy bellowed as he scooted closer, his belly slapping the curve of Edward's ass as his hand worked Ed's familiar length. Ed's hole gripped Izzy roughly, enough to keep him from pulling out. Izzy came then, balls contracting to fill Ed's body with every bit of come Izzy gave him.
Ed gave a shout, grunting as heat splashed his insides. His own cock twitched, filled with Izzy's spend, and spilled his load over Izzy’s hand. His knees could no longer hold him up, so he rolled onto his side and pulled Izzy with him. "Thanks, Iz. I meant it."
Izzy went willingly and found Ed positioned perfectly for cuddling. "Told you not to worry, but I'll rub your knee in the morning."
"Okay." Ed was smiling, and petting Izzy gently. "Clean up before breakfast?"
"Absolutely," Izzy agreed, and by the time they were both asleep again, and he'd simply crowded to him, not so long as they were together.
Izzy had spent the past three nights alone with Ed, and if he hadn't torn his shirt, he'd have never known.
But he'd gone to his cabin to change into a light linen shirt, meaning to drop the black one off with Wee John for repair.
He'd sat down on the edge of his bunk, and that's when he smelled it.
Lavender, a hint of vanilla, salt breeze and old books.
Stede.
Stede had been sleeping in Izzy's berth to make sure that he'd been able to be alone with Ed.
The fuck was he doing that for? Surely he wasn't tired of Ed already... maybe he was just tired of having Izzy around.
That couldn't stand, because Ed needed Stede. Squaring his shoulders, he went to find Stede and tell him to get the hell back to his cabin.
"Israel!" Stede sang out, as soon as he saw the first mate emerge on deck. "Just who I was looking for! Tell me, would you be my guest for dinner tonight? I finally have the evening free, and as such, I would like to spend some time with you!"
"Go have dinner with your actual partner," Izzy snarled, caught wrong-footed because his instinct was to agree. "And stay the fuck out of my cabin."
Stede looked surprised, but merely nodded. "Well, if that's the case, I certainly won't inflict my presence on you."
Izzy watched as Stede disappeared below.
The dinner bell rang, and Izzy pretended not to notice that every single crewman shot him furtive glances over their shoulders.
Fuck 'em.
At least Edward had his real boyfriend back, and he tried not to care.
"In case you didn't realize this, I'm not above lying to get what I want."
Izzy spun, stumbling just a bit. Stede was standing behind him with a ridiculously large picnic hamper and something--a fucking blanket was folded on the lid. "Get the fuck back to your cabin."
"Sorry, no--I don't think I am sorry, actually." Stede picked up the blanket and shook it out to lay on the deck. "I had hoped to do this in front of the fireplace, it's terribly romantic and a bit more private, but needs must--"
"Where the hell is Edward?" Izzy demanded.
"Having dinner with the crew, and he's asked to try storytime for a couple of nights, test out how his reading is coming along," Stede answered sunnily. "Later he's got something to talk over with Fang. I didn't pry, but I think it's probably about a d-o-g, the crew has been prattling on about the rats and how a rat terrier would be better than a cat."
Stede nodded in satisfaction as he smoothed out the last wrinkles in the blanket, then patted the empty expanse.
"You can't be fucking serious!" Izzy shouted, ready to yank his hair out. "What do you think you're doing, what happens when Ed realizes you're fucking around here instead of with him, especially when you just got off three-day's rotation?"
"Tell you to keep your fucking voice down, mate. Whole crew can hear you. Stede, where's the story book?" Ed's head and shoulders appeared on the stairs.
"Burgundy cover, on the desk. I think the map charts might be covering it up."
"Right, I remember moving it to hold a corner down. Thanks, love." Ed disappeared into the cabin, came back clutching the book, and waved goodbye as he charged back downstairs.
Izzy was scowling, discomfited. "What the absolute FUCK is going on!"
Stede was calmly unpacking the hamper, laying out china plates, heavy flatware, and crystal glassware. "Edward got first draw," he said simply. "After the discussion the other night, we both agreed that we've been putting too much emphasis on you joining us, instead of you being an equal partner. There's always Ed and Stede, my dearest, but there is also an Ed and Izzy, and a Stede and Izzy. Those are important relationships, too, and we all need to make sure that they are thriving as well. And Edward, of course, got to you first. Though I hope you have some feeling for me, too, not just as Ed's partner, but as yours, too."
Izzy just stared at Stede like he was a museum exhibit; Bonnetus Idiotica, idiot Bonnet under glass. Then he started yanking the corners of the blanket to bundle everything up. "Get up, you great lump, I'm not having this out on deck during fucking story time!"
Stede swiped the delicate glasses from the blanket and simply hoped that the flatware didn't chip the china on the way.
Izzy kicked the captains' cabin open and laid the blanket down on the rug in front of the fireplace.
Then he went to close the door, and paused to point something out. "This? It's a lock. I know it's a lock because I fucking supervised the installation in Nassau seven months ago!" Then he turned the bolt, locking the door. "See? It's locked now, which means a private fucking discussion, you twat!"
Stede beamed happily as Izzy bitched him out. The china was unchipped, and Stede smoothed the blanket out. "If I promise to be suitably chastened for not locking the door, will you please come sit with me?" Stede contrived to look acceptably sober and cowed.
Izzy growled as he dragged his gloved hand through his hair and tugged hard. "Fucking... fine." As ungracefully as possible, Izzy dropped down onto the blanket.
Stede was ready with a glass of wine, and held it out to Izzy. "Can't, I'm on late tonight."
"Actually, you aren't. Mr. Buttons asked for the overnight to bask in the moon, I don't remember now if it's full or new, so I gave him the watch and you have the evening free."
"Fuck, I thought I'd accounted for that," Izzy swore. Buttons was crazy as a shit house rat, but he was capable and Izzy tried to make him happy.
"He didn't seem terribly distraught so I think we can chalk it up to a simple misunderstanding," Stede said gently. "Hungry?"
A grumble from Izzy's stomach answered him, and Izzy flushed.
"Izzy, did you skip lunch today?" Stede asked, even as he started pulling out food and piling it on Izzy's plate.
"I was busy," Izzy snapped, and he had been, until he'd torn his shirt.
Stede handed Izzy a full plate.
Rice and dried beef that Roach had fixed up with a gravy. Two slices of bread, slathered in salted butter. Izzy's favorite cheese, sliced thick like the bread. An orange, quartered.
None of the fancy bullshit that Stede so often served, but... normal food, food that any sailor would be glad to have, and to his surprise, Stede was serving himself the same things. "Fuck off, where's your fancy shit?"
"I feel like whenever you are with me, I'm feeding you a lot food you'd rather not be eating, but now that I am with you, I thought perhaps a more standard fare might make you feel more comfortable," Stede explained. "However, I did splurge on dessert and paid Roach to make butter shortbread."
Izzy stopped eating. "You got shortbread in that basket? You're lying."
Stede withdrew a metal tin and removed the lid to display the bars of flaky, crumbly cookie. He cherished the idea of feeding Izzy the shortbread, but knew that probably wasn't going to be allowed. "I would lie about a great many things, but not about shortbread, and not to you."
Izzy reached out, but Stede moved the tin. "Finish your dinner before you get dessert," he chided.
That really wasn't going to be a hardship, and Izzy all but licked the plate clean, using a chunk of the bread to sop up the last flecks of gravy.
Stede passed the tin to Izzy. "Perhaps you can have lunch with me tomorrow? It'd make certain that you don't forget again, and I would value your opinion on the chore chart, I think it's really working out."
"Stede. Stop." Leaning over the blanket, he shoved a cookie in Stede's mouth, forcing him to shut up and chew. "You're out of your goddamn mind. Is Edward not enough for you, or is it to make him happy that you're trying this?"
Stede swallowed hard, nearly choking in his haste and washing it down with an uncouth gulp of wine. "You pretty little idiot," Stede said, repeating one of Izzy's favorite things to call Stede. "You really think that I only put up with you, still, after everything?" He put his hand on Izzy's cheek. "I love you, I love that twat's become a term of affection, I love the way you look at Edward, and I love the way you pretend that you're not watching me, when I feel the weight of your eyes. I wish you would lay your head in my lap like Edward does, just to feel you close." He sighed. "Can you tell me how to show this to you, in any way that you would accept? Because I don't know, and I'm afraid to try, because I couldn't stand it if I drove you away."
Izzy didn't know what to say, or do, in reaction to the absolute torrent of words from Stede's mouth. Slowly he got to his knees, picking his way around the dishes to end up on the same side as Stede. Stede held his breath, hands held up in surrender as Izzy moved.
Izzy stared at Stede for a moment, and then, like a frightened cat, Izzy stretched out and put his head on Stede's knee.
Stede slowly brought his hand down, and Izzy jerked involuntarily at the movement. Stede froze again, waiting for the tension to slide out of Izzy's shoulders and back. It took nearly twenty minutes for Izzy to relax, and only then did Stede lightly touch his hair. "Is this all right, or should I stop?" Stede whispered after the first stroke.
Izzy shrugged, settling in a little more comfortably. "S'fine," came the answer after a moment. "S'nice."
Izzy liked the careful fingers in his hair. Fingers that scratched, but didn't pull. Fingers that petted without yanking--although the pulls were nice when he was getting his face fucked.
Stede sat quietly, ecstatic with Izzy's head on his knee and stroking his hair. They sat in silence so long that Stede was startled when Izzy spoke again. "I don't hate you, you know."
Yes, Stede knew that much. "I know, and I shouldn't ask for more."
"You're good for Ed. You bring out the good stuff. I, uh, it took me a while to get that. Fuck knows you're still a shitty pirate, but you're getting better, and. And I. I see that. I'm trying to... I see you. And Ed. And you're getting better."
"Oh," Stede said softly, but Izzy kept on.
"I'm just. Not. I'm outliving my use and I don't know what to do about it."
"Israel." Stede was so choked up he couldn't say anything more for a moment, but his free hand found Izzy's and squeezed tightly.
Izzy squeezed back. "Stede."
"You are not outliving your use," Stede said firmly. "You are necessary to Edward and to myself. Not because of what you can do, not because you're frankly delightful in bed. But because you live, because you breathe. Waking up with you and Edward is the thing that makes my heart beat every morning. One beat for him, one for you. It's a highlight of my day if you admit, not completely useless, Bonnet because that is a compliment from you. Don't ever think that you aren't necessary. This ship, and the people on board, would be lost without you."
Izzy was clinging to Stede's leg, their hands joined in a death grip. He was shaking, and jerked in surprise when Stede hauled him up to sit in his lap. Still he was shaking and Stede's mouth was against his ear. "You think you haven't changed? Horrible Iggy who cut my shirt open, would he have participated in the chore chart discussion, or even signed up for it? No, he'd have told me to go fuck myself with the main mast. Or would he have held training classes for the crew in swordplay so that, in your own words, you useless fuckers don't die before I get a chance to kill you myself? And I notice you always try to schedule Buttons around his moon time, and I see you teaming up the couples to get them working together. You're becoming good, too, only you don't see it because you're watching everyone else."
Izzy felt like he was shaking apart, held together only by Stede's firm grip. He wanted to protest, complain that he'd done it on Ed's orders, but he could not get the words out. He was seen, the things he'd done had been noticed, and he finally found the words. "That's not me, I'm just."
"Just trying, like me, like Edward. Just trying to be better. And we see that, Izzy, and we love you. Not just First Mate Hands, but Izzy, too. Grumpy, bitchy, lovely, my sweet, good, angry Izzy."
"Just Izzy," he choked out.
"Yes, just Izzy." Stede refused to let Izzy pull away. "Come with me, darling," he murmured. "I'll heat up some water for the tub, I'll wash your hair and we can soak together, and then if you want me to, I'll fetch Edward from your cabin."
Izzy shook his head no. He felt shivery and raw, a clam shell pried open and scraped clean. "No Edward," he answered, grasping Stede's collar tightly. "Not tonight." He couldn't bear to face the man who was his God feeling like this, but Stede...
Stede felt things, Stede understood. "Please, no Edward."
"All right, love. No Ed, just us."
Yes, just us. Just Stede and Izzy. Yes.
Stede carried Izzy into the bathroom. A barrel of rainwater sat in the corner. "You get undressed, I'll be back with hot water."
"And you'll join me?" Izzy demanded, still raw and open.
"Of course, darling. Anything for you."
Stede had fetched in two buckets of steaming hot water, and had a third warming on the fire in the fireplace. The bathtub was full, Izzy was already in the tub, sitting nervously with a lump of soap in his fist and a soft cloth in his hand.
Stede had quickly undressed after filling the tub, and he leaned over to kiss Izzy's cheek on his tattoo. "Let me in with you, darling, yes?"
"Yes, please." Izzy sloshed water in the tub as he leaned forward, and Stede slipped in behind him.
"May I still wash your hair?" Stede asked, running his hands gently through it, separating strands with his fingers.
Izzy shivered at the light touch. "Yeah, you can."
"Thank you." Stede fumbled a bit for his own bottle, and squeezed a bit of the soap into his palm. "Here we go," he murmured, tilting Izzy's head back just a bit.
Izzy closed his eyes as he felt Stede's palm on his forehead, shielding his eyes with one hand as the other started massaging Izzy's scalp and working up a lather.
Izzy luxuriated in the attention, bringing his own hand up to press against Stede's, protecting his own eyes.
Stede smiled, sliding both hands into Izzy's hair and scrubbing firmly. His fingertips dug into Izzy's scalp, working the lather in firmly, his nails scratched lightly, teasingly as he worked from forehead to neck in long strokes.
"Feels good," Izzy admitted, grunting softly after one particular scratch dug into an itch he hadn't even realized was there.
"That's the idea," Stede answered back. "Oh, I'd wish to spoil you terribly!"
Izzy shook his head, and Stede picked up a tumbler and started pouring clear water through the frothy suds. "No, I didn't think you'd let me," Stede answered with a grin, rinsing the suds off Izzy's face and hair. "But I still want to."
Izzy settled back into the hot water when his hair was clean, and started soaping up the washrag.
Stede took the rag out of Izzy's hand, and dragged it along Izzy's skin. Hand and arm, shoulders and neck, over a wide chest and down the curve of generous tits. "You will let me show you how much I love you, won't you? Let me show you how devoted I am to you?"
Izzy shook his head again, because he wasn't the one worthy of devotion. "Stede, just--"
"No, Izzy." Stede wrapped damp arms around Izzy's chest and hauled him backwards, pressed against him skin to skin. "I won't forget and I won't stop it, because you need to be loved, by me, and know that it's for yourself. It's my honor to care for you, it's my privilege. Not my job, Israel. Not a chore I've taken on, not something that's required. A choice I make. I choose to love you, and I keep making that choice, every time I see you. I think, Look at him, Stede Bonnet, and how lucky are you that he bothers to give you the time of day. And when you are in bed with Edward and me, sometimes I'm quite selfish. Sometimes I wish I had your attention, instead of him. That I could be lucky enough."
Izzy didn't struggle to get out of Stede's grip, because he was still shaken, and it was only the rawness that filled him that made him speak. "Figured you didn't want me touching you, I was only there for Edward."
"Beautiful idiot, how could you think that?" Stede pressed kisses to Izzy's cheek and down his neck. "I crave you, just as much as I crave Edward."
"No, you have Ed. You don't need me." Izzy struggled to get out of Stede's immediate grip. "Let me go."
"What if I don't want to? What if I want to keep you, Izzy? Would you let me keep you?"
Izzy struggled against Stede for another few minutes, and then suddenly relaxed. Stede wasn't going to let him go. "Yeah, I would." Ed already kept him, why not Stede, too?
Stede's tight hold on him felt... comfortable. Felt right, being held and comforted and... maybe cherished, even. "Yeah."
The bath had grown cold, been warmed with another bucket, and they were both getting pruned and waterlogged, but Stede had no intention of getting out until Izzy was ready.
Izzy had been mostly quiet for the last hour, letting Stede's fingertips brush over his wrist and forearm, occasionally linking and squeezing their fingers.
Stede's legs were on either side of Izzy's, and his feet occasionally rubbed down Izzy's calf.
At first it was vaguely irritating, being rubbed on, but then he had a strange, not entirely unwelcome thought. Maybe Stede enjoyed touching him. The touches weren't heavy or demanding, not meant to either arouse or satiate. They were feather-light... comforting.
Almont like he was making sure Izzy was still there.
Almost like he couldn't be content without touching Izzy somehow.
That kept Izzy's mind occupied, cataloging each of the tender touches, feeling each one on his skin long after they stopped or restarted.
Stede always touched Edward like this, Izzy realized with a startle. He always petted Ed's hair, stroked his tattoos, played footsie under the blanket.
Water splashed as Izzy turned around, and he wasn't sure how he felt about Stede's hands raised in surrender, tentative fear on his face.
"Are you all right, darling? Did I bother you, I'm--" Stede found his words cut off by Izzy's hand over his mouth."
You're touching me like you do with Edward." Instead of the accusation he'd meant it to be, it came out as surprise, almost wonderment, and he nearly cursed.
"Oh. Well, yes, I suppose I was. I didn't think about it, I was just enjoying the feel of you in my arms," Stede answered honestly.
Izzy shook his head. "No, I mean." He didn't know how to say what he meant; he meant You touch me like I'm precious, you touch me like I deserve tenderness, like I'm not Izzy Hands. All he got out was, "... like Edward. Special."
Stede's expression melted from the fear of upsetting Izzy to a sad smile of understanding. "You mean, why am I touching you like I love you?" He didn't have to wait for Izzy's confirming nod. "Because I do love you and I want to feel you like this, quiet and sweet, because I can treat you better than you usually allow. If I weren't afraid you'd bite my fingers off, I would never stop petting you or stroking your hair. Izzy, if you would let me, I would treat you exactly as I do Edward. I love you both so very much, and I am bursting to show you."
"I won't take anything away from him, not even you," Izzy said flatly. "Save it, he needs--"
"Do shut up," Stede interrupted snidely. "Do you honestly believe that I would shortchange Edward on anything? More importantly, do you honestly believe that I--who you have accused of spending too freely--do not have enough time, enough energy, enough love, to spend on both of you? It's not either Ed or Izzy. It's not a choice because I couldn't make it. Whether or not you accept it, it's already Ed AND Izzy. You only have to decide if you want it--if you want me--or not. Regardless of your choice, you should know that I will not change how I feel about you." Stede leaned forward, putting his hands on Izzy's face. "Value yourself as highly as Edward and I do. Choose to accept the love we have for you."
"You... stop asking me, give me an order," he begged, hands gripping Stede's wrists.
"I order you, First Mate Hands, to show me what you are feeling right now, and we'll figure it out together," Stede offered. "That's the only order I can give you."
It was enough.
Izzy dragged Stede's hands from his face and put them on his chest. He leaned forward, pressing his mouth hard against Stede's. The familiar press of tongues and teeth, nibbled lips and tugged hair was a soothing balm.
Stede was exploring Izzy's chest; gently caressing pierced nipples, thumbs tracing the curve of generous tits, teasing tugs at the graying hair dusting his torso.
Gently touching, fingers tripping up the bare indents of Izzy's ribs and scowled into his mouth. "Either you're working too hard or not eating enough," Stede muttered.
"Working too much, stupid useless fucker," Izzy breathed in Stede's mouth. "Need to get some competent crew."
"Discussion for later," Stede promised. His thumb rubbed over Izzy's swallow tattoo, which he was very much wanting to kiss. Except it meant leaving Izzy's mouth, which he emphatically did not want to do.
"Out of the tub, it's getting cold again," Izzy grumbled, and grabbed onto Stede in shock when Stede stood up, one arm around Izzy’s waist lifting him up.
"Legs around me," he murmured, and Izzy wrapped himself around Stede as fumbled a towel open and draped it around him like a cape. The step out of the tub was precarious, but Stede refused to relinquish his grip on Izzy's waist and Izzy let out a breathless chuckle. "Gonna kill us both, twat."
Stede shook his head stubbornly. "I have you and I won't let you go."
Carefully, Stede deposited Izzy onto the sofa in front of the fireplace. Kneeling there, dripping on the rug, Stede took the towel and carefully dried Izzy's feet, getting in between the toes and kissing the scar tissue where the pinky once was. Each ankle was kissed, then a kiss to each instep. Calves were next, and each hamstring was kissed reverently. Thighs next, though Stede avoided Izzy’s prick. Instead, he kissed the indent of each hip, tongue lapping at each leg crease.
Stede felt Izzy's body shaking, felt the tension as he worked his way up.
Izzy's navel begged for a tongue, and Stede obliged. His hands rested on the barely-there curve of Izzy's ass, drying his lower back.
Then up his belly, even as Izzy moaned at the loss of Stede's tongue.
"Ssh, my love," Stede whispered against his skin. "I promise you, I won't leave you wanting."
Izzy brought a hand up, and let it rest on Stede's hair. Warm from the fire, it was still damp as Izzy stroked through the soft mass.
"Yes, just like that," Stede encouraged, even as the towel crept higher, over chest and shoulders.
Arms next, and Stede dried each finger and kissed each palm worshipfully.
Izzy yanked the towel out of Stede's hands and threw it aside. He was tingling all over, his cock aching. "Fuck me," Izzy demanded, and he could feel his hole clenching in anticipation. "I'm not finished yet," Stede answered, and he scooted back, just enough to bring his mouth to Izzy's cock.
Izzy moaned; not the first time Stede had sucked his cock, but it was far more frequent for Izzy to be on his knees.
Stede licked the dripping head with swipes of his tongue before engulfing the length down his throat. Izzy shouted at the sudden heat hands going behind his back to brace against the sofa.
Stede smirked around his mouthful, straining to take Izzy's cock to the root, until his nose was pressed into freshly washed hair and skin.
Izzy fisted his hands in the upholstery, near jumping out of his skin when Stede's hands touched him.
Stede kept Izzy's cock in his throat, not moving, not sucking. His fingers kneaded taut thighs, digging in to relax the knotted muscles.
"W-what are you doing?" Izzy demanded.
Stede reluctantly pulled his mouth off Izzy's cock. "I'm trying to relax you so you can enjoy getting your dick sucked," came the answer, licking his lips. "You taste so good, I don't want to let you go." Giving Izzy a flirty look, Stede put his mouth back on Izzy's cock.
Izzy wasn't used to this kind of thing, but he gave himself over, trusting Stede.
Stede felt the relaxation of the tension in Izzy's body, and he kept warming Izzy's cock in his mouth. It felt decadent, almost luxurious, kneeling in front of his lover and keeping his cock hard and safe against his tongue. His lips worked in small suckle, and he let his head rest against Izzy's thigh.
After a few long moments, Izzy's hand relaxed and carded through Stede's hair. "Good, Stede, that's actually nice," he struggled to get out, because keeping his voice level was a challenge.
Stede looked up at Izzy through his lashes, mouth full of cock.
"You're happy just like this," Izzy said, awestruck. "Just having me close, tasting me." The fingertips of his other hand rubbed over Stede's stretched lips. "I still want you to fuck me. Is that okay?" Stede nodded silently, wrapping his arms around Izzy’s leg. "Yes, just let you do this?" Izzy asked.
Stede nodded again, but still didn't suck.
"I can start fucking your throat when I'm ready, can't I?" Izzy asked, with more amazement. "Because you'll let me."
Stede nodded enthusiastically, Izzy's cock slipping a bit out of his mouth and he hurried to take it back in.
"You'll let me because you love me." Awestruck realization, and Stede closed his eyes, humming affirmatively. "You want me. All of me."
A last nod, and a satisfied smile spread across Stede's face as he relaxed against Izzy.
Izzy's fingers spread through Stede's hair, petting softly and letting him sit. "Okay." Stede's arms around his leg, the heat and wet of Stede's mouth around his cock, Izzy was almost floating.
Twenty minutes later, Izzy couldn't stand it any longer, and his fingers tightened in Stede's hair. Stede perked up, feeling the tug, and started to suck.
Izzy slid to the edge of the sofa, pushing his cock into Stede's throat, hips raising.
Stede braced on Izzy's thighs, head moving to make up for the awkward thrust angle. Izzy's fingers tightened in Stede's hair, pulling him down even as he pushed up. "You got a good mouth, Stede," he grunted softly, thumb rubbing behind Stede's ear.
Stede's nails dug into Izzy's thighs, arousal and satisfaction spiraling through his body. He redoubled his efforts on Izzy's cock, his teeth carefully grazing the head as his tongue grooved and guided the shaft into his throat.
The light scrape of teeth against his cock made Izzy jerk, spilling down Stede's throat. Stede swallowed every drop, licked Izzy clean, and then laid his cheek against Izzy's knee. "Thank you, Izzy."
"If you do not fuck me right now, I'm going to kick you in the face," he threatened, but he was smiling as he looked down at Stede. "Your choice."
Stede brushed his cheek against Izzy's knee. "No, my love, it's your choice. You want me to fuck you? I will gladly. If you don't... I won't."
"No. I do want you to fuck me. Please." He gripped Stede's hair tightly. "I... want you."
"Then you've got me." Stede got to his feet, offering Izzy both his hands. "Shall we move to the bed, then?"
Izzy rose and slid both arms around Stede's waist, then dragged him back down to the sofa, and then down onto the floor, onto the blanket by the fireplace. "I want you here."
Here, somewhere neither of them had been before.
Stede pushed the dishes out of the way, stacked them quickly into the picnic basket, and pulled Izzy onto the floor beside him. "Then stay here, I need to get a few things."
Izzy curled up on the blanket, watching Stede's naked body move around the bedroom. He gathered a bowl of water, several soft cloths made from ruined clothes, and a bottle of oil.
Then he knelt beside Izzy, putting the water and cloths beside the sofa, and keeping the bottle of oil close. "Last chance to say no."
Izzy spread his legs in answer, and Stede settled easily between them. "There is... one more thing." A mischevious grin. "I have to make sure you're ready."
"Ready--what?" Izzy's breath caught in his throat as Stede's fingers parted his cheeks, and his tongue licked over the tight opening. "What the fuck!"
Stede only smiled against Izzy's skin as his tongue started to press in, tip working firmly against the tight muscle until it started to loosen. He let his tongue slip deeper, nose pressed against Izzy's taint as he licked further in.
Izzy tried to push himself further down on Stede's tongue, panting softly as his soft cock thrummed. It was trying to harden, trying to get erect again, but it just wasn't going to happen.
He whined at the sensation, reaching down and spreading his own cheeks to free Stede's hands.
Stede gave one last, deep lick, then rested his chin on Izzy's knee. "Do you know why I wanted you to come first?"
"Because you're a terrible pricktease," Izzy got out, hooking a leg over Stede's shoulder.
"Because I wanted this to be about you, and what you want, and what made you feel good, not about me." He pressed kisses along Izzy's thigh, over his balls, up his soft cock.
"Get on with it," was the command, and Izzy's voice was not hesitant in the least.
The bottle of oil rolled easily to Stede's hand, and he broke the seal to let the oil drip over his fingers and his cock. "I'm going to go slowly, don't worry," he murmured, and let one slick finger press into Izzy's licked-open hole.
It was nowhere near enough, and Izzy let him know. "Give me more, Stede, stop fucking around and give it to me!"
Stede smiled, and gave Izzy exactly what he asked for. Two fingers, and in quick succession, a third finger, and he teased the outside of Izzy's rim with his thumb. "Not this time, love, but I've been reading about things, and I'd like to share some of them with you. Filthy, dirty things, like the thing with my tongue. I've never even done that with Edward. That's just you and me, my love."
Izzy's body strained against Stede's fingers, the overstimulation of his body singing like the stretch of tired muscles. "Tell me later," Izzy begged.
Stede moved up, hips parting Izzy's thighs as the slick head of his cock pressed in. "Lying in bed with you tonight, I'll whisper in your ear all the filthy things I've been reading about, all the things I want to do with you." He leaned over Izzy's body, pressing their chests together and linking their fingers. "You'll feel my seed leaking out of your ass, wonder what else I will do to put it back in there." His tongue tasted the sweat creeping at the hollow of Izzy's throat, licked over the swallow tattoo, mouthed along the outline as his cock rocked Izzy's body with rough strokes.
Izzy's hands linked at the back of Stede's neck, even as his legs wrapped around Stede's hips. He arched his back, striving to push into Stede's downward thrusts, the angle changing and pulling Stede in deeper with each rock.
The feeling of Izzy clinging to him made Stede growl, tossing his hair back out of his face and leaning down, catching Izzy's open mouth in a kiss. Wet and messy, saliva strung between their mouths as Stede fucked him harder, and Izzy pulled himself up to meet every motion. His nails skated over Stede's sweaty neck, leaving marks that he didn't even notice. Stede was leaving bruises on Izzy's hips, dragging him closer and mauling him.
His cock brushed Izzy's prostate, and even soft, his cock twitched and jerked, dribbling a few weak spurts.
Stede gripped Izzy's hips tightly, rearing back and pulling him up as he came. Izzy's hands stayed around his neck, and he felt the base of his cock pressing hard against Izzy's cheeks.
Izzy's head was lolling back, his cock trying desperately to come again, managing only to dribble.
Stede cradled Izzy in his arms as he pulled out, letting him lie gently on the blanket. "Just a little bit of tidy-up, dearest," he murmured in Izzy's ear, then dampened one of the cloths.
The water was cool, and it felt cold on Izzy's overheated skin as Stede wiped his face and his neck, between his tits, and the little mess from his cock. A fresh cloth for himself, and Stede didn't spend nearly the amount of time on himself that he did on Izzy.
A third cloth was wet in the bowl, and Stede started to wipe off his arms and his shoulders, anywhere he could reach where Izzy might have sweated or gotten dirty.
"There, now you're clean," he said with great satisfaction, sitting back on his heels and looking down at Izzy sprawled on the blanket, fire reflecting off his skin. "And you're beautiful."
"Shut it," Izzy demanded, sitting up on his elbows. "What you got to drink?"
"Wine, brandy, rum, and water," Stede rattled off. "Which is your pleasure?"
"Tea," Izzy said perversely. He wouldn't have admitted it at gunpoint, but he did enjoy that stupid dirty dishwater.
"Black, Earl Grey, or the cinnamon and cloves?"
"No. The vanilla one."
Stede grinned. "My personal favorite!" He got water in the bucket and hung it over the fire to boil, and he puttered around the desk with a teapot and teacups. "I don't usually keep crockery in the bedroom, but you're in luck." Of course, if he'd had to go to the galley to find a teapot and cups, he would have done.
Anything for Izzy.
And, if he was feeling comfortable enough to order Stede to make tea, and admitting he liked to drink it? Then maybe they were making progress.
As he brought the pot and the cups back over, he nudged the tin of shortbread towards Izzy. "Go ahead, tea deserves a little snack."
Izzy immediately shoved one bar into his mouth, and shoved a second one into Stede's.
Stede's shoulders shook with laughter, watching Izzy spew out shortbread crumbs from trying to cram it all in.
Then it was Izzy's turn to laugh and point as Stede choked on his shortbread, and they ended up sitting side by side, waiting for the water to boil and the tea to steep properly before they tried eating any more shortbread. "Yeah, I'll keep you," Izzy admitted after a minute, catching his breath and actually smiling.
End