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I Carry Your Heart
by AccioJD
Baz-5th year
I figured it out during 5th year. The beautiful, reckless, absolute idiot had gotten himself stung by a manticore, of all things. He shouldn’t have even been fighting a manticore. They are extremely deadly, rarities to see in the wild, and no known cure to their stings. Crowley knows why the Mage thought that was a good idea to send him to deal with it. That should have been a job for highly trained specialists on the Coven, not a kid who can’t control his magic.
But then again, it was only his endless reserve of magic that kept him alive. His magic fought to save him long enough to give Bunce a chance to get him back to the infirmary alive, not that there was anything Nurse Printz could do for him.
His magic, seemingly infinite, would use up its reserves eventually. His magic would burn out, and Simon Snow would die.
I snuck into the infirmary the first night they were back. It was late, well past midnight. I fed first before visiting him just in case I was right. He looked so sick, so pale, that it made me feel physically ill. I could feel my cold, dead heart stuttering in panic. I took out a wand and cast a quick nothing to see here on myself. I sat on the side his bed. Honestly, as I picked up his hand, I wouldn’t have been able to tell you if I wanted this to work or not, but I knew I had to try. I knew there were risks. I knew if it worked, it wouldn't be pleasant for me.
I whispered, “I carry your heart with me.” As soon as I said it, I knew it worked. But it was also worse than I imagined. I figured there might be pain, but this wasn't pain. This was the feeling of my magic, my power, the life in me suddenly draining out. Like a cell phone battery turning from green to red rapidly and then flicking off.
It was awful. I thought I was going to throw up, my extremities felt cold, and I started shaking uncontrollably. I fell off the edge of his bed and onto the floor, unable to even put my hands down to brace myself. I looked up at Simon’s hand, hanging limply from the bed where I let it go. I stared at it until my vision tunneled and winked out to black.
When I woke up, there was warm sunlight streaming in from the windows onto my face. Hours must have passed if it was light outside. I felt as though I had been hit by a lorry. I was exhausted in a way I had never been before. I sat up and looked around. I was still lying on the floor next to Simon’s cot, and Simon wasn’t there anymore. Fortunately, my concealment spell seemed to hold, despite my unconsciousness, and neither Simon nor Nurse Printz noticed by prone body lying next to his bed.
I crept out of the infirmary, and back up to Mummers. When I got back, I glanced at the clock and saw it was close to 2 in the afternoon. Thankfully it was a Saturday, and I didn’t miss class. I needed a shower and a nap. I felt like absolute crap. I would force myself to think of what this meant after a long nap and some food, not before. After probably the quickest shower I have taken in my life, I collapsed into bed.
I didn’t wake up again until after dark… again.
This time when I woke up, Simon was sitting on his bed, fake reading, mostly staring at me. I let myself look at him for a second before turning to the ceiling. He was radiant. Glowing. Healthy. So alive. The exact opposite of what I had seen not even 24 hours ago in the infirmary.
“You slept all day.” He said, with a growl.
I said nothing because it’s not like it was a question. Numpty
“Are you sick?” He asked again. “Vampires can’t get sick.” I rolled my eyes.
“I’m sick. Have you considered maybe I’m not a vampire?” I said, because why not.
“I’ll find out what you are plotting. I know you weren’t behind the manticore, but you weren’t anywhere to be found when I got back from the infirmary. Planning a party to celebrate my death?” He said and I choked back a laugh. Does he even hear himself?
“Contrary to popular belief Simon, not everything revolves around you.” Then, because I’m a pathetic and embarrassment to the Pitch name, I asked. “How did you survive the manticore?”
Simon just rolled his eyes, but he did answer. “They don’t know. Best guess is my magic burned out the poison. Apparently, it didn’t look good, then suddenly it did.”
I nodded and then rolled over, facing away from him.
He left not long after.
At least they didn’t suspect soulmate magic. Why would they? It was so rare to see it used. I had never ever seen it used.
The way I felt now, even a full day after I used it, I hope I never had too again.
_____________________
Simon- 7th year- Fall
“I’m thinking of doing my research project on Soulmate magic.” Penny said. I don’t know why she is always thinking about work. It was a beautiful fall day, and we were camped out under an oak tree with a large blanket she had spelled and enough snacks to make it until dinner.
I even had a view of the pitch, and I could see Baz and his teammates practicing. It was the perfect way to keep an eye on him.
“Interesting” I nodded, not paying much attention to her. Baz had taken off in a breakaway and would probably… yup, shot to the upper corner, and I swear he gave me a look after he scored.
Penelope kept talking. “There has to be a way to channel the connection, and preserve healing element, without the power drain on their soulmate. After all, the soulmate spell hasn’t been around that long. There has to be a way to make it better.”
Suddenly she caught my attention.
“Wait.. what soulmate spell.”
Ah, there it is, that annoyed look from Penny when I’ve missed something very big.
“Carry your heart.” She said without magic.
“Why is that a soulmate spell?” I asked. I had heard of the spell before; it was a healing spell. But it was almost never used because it worked so infrequently, and it took part of the magic of the person who cast it. Or something like that. Life force? I don’t even remember.
“The theory is that the reason the spell is so powerful, but so rarely a success, is that it only works when a powerful caster uses it on their soulmate.” I almost rolled my eyes at that.
“Think about it, Simon.” She started “The Mage himself couldn’t cast the spell on anyone, and I know even Nurse Printz, the most powerful healing mage we know, has never used it successfully. It’s not about power.” She was working herself up into a property lecture.
“It’s not just about love either. There have been documented cases of mages unable to cast it on siblings, parents, their own children. The only cases it’s been successful are when the two people are deeply connected.”
“As soulmates?” I said with a laugh. “Come on, Penny, that’s not a thing.”
Penny stared at me. “Have you listened to my father drone on about soulmates… like ever… in the last 7 years I’ve known you? It’s rare, very few of us even have one, but it is most definitely a thing.”
That day was the last I thought of soulmates for a long time. I mean even if Agatha was my soulmate (unlikely at this rate), she was not likely powerful enough to even use the spell. Apparently, it drained the castors magic too. Took a part of them. They might get it back, but they might not, and they also wouldn’t know how much they would give up. I suppose it depended on the severity of the injury.
It was a nice thought, to be able to save someone you loved so much. I sure would love someone to be able to heal me after our misadventures, but I wouldn’t want anyone to do it if it hurt them. I hopped Penny had some luck. She was right, if someone could save a loved one without hurting themselves, that would be pretty amazing.
Baz- 7 th Year- Winter
Simon has been following me everywhere and it might literally be the death of me. I can’t get a moment of peace. He watches me play football, stares at me in the dining hall, and follows me out to hunt almost anytime I leave Mummer’s house.
Speaking of leaving my room, it was the dead of winter, and it was bloody freezing out. We were supposed to be hit with a snowstorm the next day and I really didn’t want to have to deal with spelling my tracks away, so I figured the smarter thing to do was hunt as much as I could and try and wait out the next few days.
I decided to wait until after dinner and head to the woods for bigger animals before the drawbridge went up. Hopefully Simon would be in the library with Bunce or on a date with Wellbelove and leave me alone for once. I couldn’t count on the weather being a deterrent.
I moved as deep into the woods as I dared before calling a doe to me. I made quick work of it, but as soon as I finished draining it, I could hear footsteps with a particular gait that I know only Simon has.
I vanished the doe and straightened up, before walking toward where I knew he’d be coming from.
What I saw made my heart freeze.
There was a small, but deep lake, that Snow had somehow found himself standing in the middle of. The ice had frozen enough to walk across, but that was hardly advisable. I had no idea how thick the ice was but judging from the bubbles of water underneath his feet, it didn’t look thick enough to hold his weight for very long.
“Snow” I said, startling him. “Don’t move” I said taking out my wand. I intended to “up up and away” him off the ice, but the idiot responded to me taking out my wand, by taking out his SWORD. The stupid thing added weight to him that wasn’t there previously. The crack was loud enough to cause birds to scatter.
Then he was gone.
A scream wretched from my throat as I threw myself towards the hole in the ice. I couldn’t see him. I couldn’t see him, and if I couldn’t see him, I couldn’t spell him out of there. I stuck my hand in where hole in the ice was, the water was freezing and my arm went numb almost instantly.
I did the only thing I could think of really, I hoped my superhuman lungs and stamina were up to the task, cracked as much ice as I could, casted a warming spell on myself, and jumped in.
Even with the warming spell, it was freezing. I felt the water like a shock to my system. Superhuman lungs or not, I couldn’t stay down here long. Thankfully I saw him quickly, I’m not sure if he was conscious or frozen in shock, but I grabbed him as quickly as I could and pulled him to the surface. He was dead weight.
I came up on solid ice. I couldn’t reach my wand, as I had hooked both arms around Simon. It wouldn’t matter if I could anyway since I couldn’t cast underwater. I shifted Simon’s weight before putting my full strength behind a punch to the ice. Thank Circe, it gave way, and I stuck my head out and gasped for air. Before I could take more than a few breaths, I pushed Simon out as much as I could, and then pulled myself out and dragged him off the ice into a clearing.
Crowley, his skin was frozen. His normally golden skin was so pale as if he were the one who was a vampire. I quickly felt for a pulse but he was too cold and I was shaking too much to tell if there was one. I could feel the panic creeping in.
I grabbed my wand. “Get well soon” I croaked out. Followed by “an apple a day.” Nothing. My spells were landing, but it didn’t seem to change anything he wasn’t moving. I couldn’t even tell if he was alive. My stomach plummeted. It felt like what little blood I had in my veins had turned to ice. Or maybe that was the cold. I don’t know, my brain felt fuzzy, like I couldn’t get a clear thought in. Simon Snow could not die. Not while I was still alive.
I had always thought we would end in flames, but maybe I was wrong. Maybe we’d end in ice.
One coherent thought that entered my brain. I grabbed his hand. “I carry your heart with me”
I didn’t think it was possible for me to feel worse, but I instantly did. I felt nauseous and I broke out in a cold sweat almost instantly. It only got worse in the seconds it took my magic, my power, to drain out of me and into Simon. I collapsed onto his chest and my last coherent thought was hoping that if this didn’t work, then I didn’t wake up either.
Simon
I opened my eyes to see the sky darkening as the sun set behind the trees. I was in the wavering wood and could feel a heavy pressure on my chest. The remnants of a headache slip away, and I stared at the sky, trying to remember what happened. Something with Baz, and then I was plunged into ice water.
That twat, if he broke the ice under me, I’ll kill him.
I tried to sit up, when I realized that the pressure on my chest was Baz, complete dead weight, draped over me. The thought of killing instantly him fled from my brain as panic took over.
“No No NO. Baz!” I screamed, scrambling up as I placed my hands on him and guiding him so that he was lying down and I was kneeling beside him.
I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think. I started shaking uncontrollably. The grief at the thought that Baz was dead was choking me. I felt like someone had put ice in my veins and I could feel my stomach clenching. His skin was so grey it was blue. He wasn’t moving at all.
“BAZ” I screamed again, shaking his shoulders. Was he dead? He felt dead. Frozen solid, his damp hair had frozen to icicles as we had probably spent hours in the woods, and it was the dead of winter. How did this even happen? How did he get so cold? Why wasn’t I the one laying still on the ground with my hair frozen to me.
I patted myself down looking for a wand and finding nothing. I saw Baz’s wand, lying next to us. And grabbed it without a second thought.
“You’re getting warmer” I cast on him. I’m not even sure that’s a spell that works on humans. I had only ever used it on a scone. And what if I lit him on fire? My brain felt like it was frozen. I was in panic.
“Baz… don’t die. Don’t die.” I whispered, lifting him up and holding him to my chest. I hoped the body heat warmed him up. Skin to skin? Wasn’t that a thing that was supposed to work?
My brain might have been frozen, but my survival instincts started to kick in. I didn’t want to risk casting on him again, I had to just get him back to the infirmary and pray to every deity he wasn’t dead.
I lifted him in my arms, adrenaline giving me strength I didn’t know I had, and took off at the quickest sprint I could manage.
I had just hit the great lawn, still running when I heard screaming from my left. I glanced over without breaking stride to see Dev and Niall running toward me, on pace to intercept me.
When they got closer, Niall immediately cast “Light as a feather” and suddenly Baz in my arms felt like nothing. Niall went to grab him from me, but there was no way I was letting him go. I could hear them yelling, and I could tell they were both terrified, but it didn’t matter. There was no one who was taking him from me.
“Don’t touch him!” I screamed and my magic did something wonky (what else is new) and created what seemed like a forcefield between me and them.
“WHAT THE FUCK, SNOW” Dev yelled, he was trying to hit the forcefield thing and he looked absolutely distraught, but I didn’t break stride to give him another chance.
“WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.” I screamed and continued running at renewed speed thanks to Niall’s charm, and now with Niall and Dev hot on my heels.
I made it to the infirmary, with the two of them only seconds behind me and screamed for Nurse Printz.
He took one look at Baz and then floated him to a bed and began casting spells on him.
Before I had a chance to say anything, Dev grabbed me and threw me up against a wall, arm on my throat.
“What the fuck did you do to him?” He growled. I have never found Dev to be intimidating, he always seemed to be like Baz but without the sharp edges that made Baz such force, but in this moment I’m pretty sure he would kill me if I gave him the chance.
I wouldn’t give him the chance, but I wouldn’t hurt him either.
“Back Off” I growled. I still had Baz’s wand on me, and amazingly it worked. Dev was forced to take a few steps back.
I glanced over to where Nurse Printz was still frantically casting spells and was relieved to see some color returning to Baz’s skin and face.
“I don’t know what happened.” I said, loud enough so that Nurse Printz could hear, less he had any ideas. “We were in the woods. I fell into the lake over out by one of the clearings. Baz must have gone in after me and pulled me out, but I don’t know why I’m fine and he’s not. I don’t remember anything after I fell in.”
Nurse Printz looked up at me. “Were you wet? Any symptoms of hypothermia? Of hypoxia? Any indication you had been in the water at all?”
“None. I woke completely dry, and Baz was lying on my chest. I thought he was dead. He’s not right?” My voice sounded high pitched and cracked. “Please say he’s not.”
“Where is his wand?” Nurse Printz said, ignoring my question.
I handed it over to the nurse for inspection.
“History of magic” Nurse Printz whispered at the wand, and it shook in his hand. Niall, Dev and I all froze to watch it. Baz and Penny both hated Harry Potter spells, but I didn’t know what this one could do.
First there was quiet as we all watched Baz’s wand shake in Nurse Printz’s hand. Then, suddenly, I could hear my voice coming from his wand, panicked, terrified, shaking yelling ‘back off’ and ‘you’re getting warmer’. Then Baz’s voice, almost equally as panicked and shaking. ‘I carry your heart with me’ and ‘an apple..’
Before Nurse Printz ended the spell, and the wand stopped shaking.
Nurse Printz looked at us, relief evident on his face. “He’s not dead. He’s going to be alright. He just needs some time.”
I felt my knees give out and I leaned against the wall. It was such a relief that everything that had kept me going left me at once. I looked up, and Niall was staring at me as if he had never seen me before.
“Well shit.” Dev said, collapsing in a chair next to Baz’s bed. “Shit.” He said again.
I saw Nurse Printz also sit down. That spell, whatever it was, seemed to take a lot out of him. Before I could ask any questions, he spoke.
“You all should leave. Baz won’t wake up for probably at least another 12 hours. Go eat, shower, sleep. I’ll let you back in tomorrow.”
“What does that spell do?” I asked, “The Harry Potter spell?”
Niall rolled his eyes and answered. I knew Niall was bright. Not Penny and Baz bright, but obviously pretty close. He had that same compulsion that they did to answer my questions, even when they didn’t otherwise want to deal with me. “It shows the last spells cast by the magical instrument in reverse order. You could go back basically to it’s first spell if you had the power to do it. But most mages, even extremely powerful ones, can’t go back more than a few spells.”
“The Coven invented it. It’s used mainly in criminal trials now. To see who started what.” Nurse Printz added. Then he sighed. “Go. All of you. I need a shower and a rest myself.” He pulled a heavy looking blanket from a cupboard and draped it over Baz.
“Can I rest here for a bit?” I asked, honestly, it was partially because I didn’t want to leave Baz, but also because I didn’t feel as though my legs could carry me to Mummers.
Nurse Printz agreed, leaving towards the door that I think his apartment was in, and Dev looked like he wanted to challenge me, but Niall shushed him and grabbed his arm, guiding him towards the door.
“You fucking hurt him, and I’ll end you, Snow.” Dev snarled at me as he walked out.
Then it was just me and Baz.
I collapsed in the chair that Dev had vacated, scooting it as close to Baz’s bed as I could and grabbing his hand. It was limp, but thankfully warmer than it had been before.
“Baz…” I didn’t know what to say. I know I had heard that carry your heart spell before, but I didn’t exactly remember when. What I knew was he clearly saved my life. The boy I had accused of plotting, of planning an attack, of trying to kill me, had saved my life without hesitation.
I leaned so my head was resting against his cot. Whatever emotions I felt were overwhelming and confusing and honestly, I just wanted to put them into a box and deal with them later.
I might have dozed off, maybe not, but suddenly, I felt a hand shaking me awake.
“Simon!” Penny said, looking as anxious as I had ever seen her. “Thank magic you’re okay! The whole school is talking about how you were seen carrying Baz out of the woods, that you might have killed him.”
I rolled my eyes and looked over at Baz. He looked a bit better. His skin at least felt it’s normal cool to the touch.
“He saved me.” I croaked trying to explain. “I fell into a lake, and he managed to pull me out and saved my life.” Penny looked confused.
“Then how?” She started to ask gesturing to Baz with unspoken confusion.
“The soulmate spell.” I whispered. I knew I had heard it before, and Penny’s appearance must have jostled something in my brain. “I carry your heart.”
Penny gasped. Her mouth open and shut a few times like a fish. I don’t think I had ever seen her at lose of words, and yet, here she was.
“What does it do to him? Is he going to be okay?” I asked. I knew what Nurse Printz had said, but I also remembered that the spell can have some awful side effects for the castor. Penny was trying to figure out how to limit those side effects for her final year project.
Penny sighed.
“I’m still researching. It’s hard because there are so few known mages who can do the spell, and who have successfully done it.” She paused a second “I’ll have to ask Baz. That would be great to incorporate into my project. I wonder how he knew.”
I refrained from reminding her that Baz probably wouldn’t appreciate being her research paper.
“How long has it been, since he cast it?” Penelope asked.
I didn’t know. “a few hours maybe?”
“He will probably be like this for at least 12 hours, and he will probably feel pretty rough after. I’ll go bring some food up for when he wakes up, and for you too. It’s almost dinner time.” Penny continued. She looked over at Baz and surprised me by taking his other hand and squeezing it.
She didn’t say anything for a bit, and then shook her head. “He saved you, Simon. If… If he really cast that spell, you must have been in bad shape.” She sighed. “I didn’t think the day would come where I would be thankful for Basilton Pitch.” She stood up and sighed again before walking out of the infirmary.
I tried to wrap my head around that. Baz saving my life. I knew I fell through the ice, but he must have gone in after me and saved me. He could have just let me drown, ended our feud, ended everything. Succeeded in riding the world of mages of me and therefore likely the Mage himself. Let the Pitches ascend to glory. By the time they found my body, it would have been over.
But he didn’t.
Not only that, the soulmate spell. How did he know? Did he know?
Did he have feelings for me? Like those kinds of feelings?
My brain was warped. I couldn’t picture it. But I knew one thing. I wanted him to love me. My magic bubbled to the surface overwhelmed with what I was feeling. Baz, still unconscious, shifted slightly as his face screwed up.
I stood up. I needed to leave, go for a run and burn off some of this excess energy. I needed to sort out my feelings and I couldn’t do that with this much energy.
So I ran.
I ran until my feet started to blister and sweat soaked through my uniform even though it was freezing outside. I never even bothered to change from the uniform I was wearing earlier. I ran until my brain was empty except for one thing that could never truly leave my mind: Baz
And for the first time, I realized that those feelings I had, the need to keep him in my line of sight, the need to know where he was, what he was doing, who he was with... well it wasn't the hate I thought it was.
Baz
I woke up screaming.
My heart felt as though it was going to come out of my chest. I could vaguely hear people around me talking, but they sounded muffled, as if my head was under water. I felt like I was underwater. I was going to die underwater and more importantly, Simon was going to die underwater with me.
But then I felt him. His hand slipped into mine and I knew, with full certainty, that Simon was alive. That he was alive, and he was sitting next to me, and now he was holding my hand. My racing heart slowed a little and my other senses started to open up.
“You’re alright Baz. I’m alright. You’re alright. We are both fine.” He was saying, softer than I’d ever heard him speak to me. I jerked my head towards him.
He was staring at me, eyes wide with concern. Concern for me?
I took a deep breath and willed myself to focus. Simon was sitting in the chair next to my bed. I could see Nurse Printz as well, casting a few spells, checking my vitals I suppose.
“How are you feeling, Basil?” The nurse asked as he finished his spells.
I blinked at him. How was I feeling? Now that I knew Simon was safe, the panic and fear rushed out of me like a balloon letting it’s air out. I felt nothing but absolute exhaustion.
I fell back asleep before I could even give an answer.
Simon
The relief I felt when Baz’s eyes focused on me quickly gave way to panic when his eyes shut again.
“He’s fine, Simon.” Nurse Printz said before I could panic further. He’s going to need another day or maybe even two of sleep before his body catches back up.
“He’s already been asleep for more than12 hours.” I said, more whining than I wanted.
“I suspect this isn’t the first time he’s used the spell.” Nurse Printz continued. “It seems to be hitting him pretty hard, and my preliminary research into it seems to indicate that the spell hits the caster harder each time.”
My stomach dropped to my toes.
“Not the first time?” I asked. “Does that mean Baz has another soulmate?”
The nurse smiled at me sadly. “I don’t think so. I went back through your record at Watford, Simon. I was looking for any unexplained healing, or anything we just credited to your remarkable magic.”
I thought about that for a second.
“The manticore.” I whispered. “But how can…” I stopped. I remembered Baz in bed that whole next day. I remembered how pale and worn he seemed.
I suddenly felt a little nauseous.
“What happens if the caster keeps casting the spell?” I asked.
The nurse sighed. “There aren’t that many documented cases, Simon. It’s extremely rare to even have a soulmate, let alone one that has a caster powerful enough and enough peril in their lives to require multiple uses.”
He paused.
“I can only find one case where a castor used the spell three times over the course of her life. She didn’t wake up the third time.”
Baz
This has to be worse than the first time I used this spell. It’s been almost three days and I can barely walk. I’d blame the vampirism, but Simon brought me bags of pig’s blood when I first woke up. I don’t know how he knew, where he got it, but I didn’t question it.
Simon hasn’t left my side other than to shower. He’s taken to sleeping in the chair next to me. I’ve added Bunce to my visitors along with Dev and Niall, who both keep giving weary glances to Simon. They know, I know they do. Everyone seems to know, but no one has brought it up.
I can tell Bunce is itching too. I had heard she was doing research on the soulmate spell, but Simon must have told her not too because she hasn’t said a word about it. She checks in on me, covering up her interest more in saving Simon’s life and bringing me my schoolwork.
“I want to beat you to the top of the class fair and square.” She said with a smirk. “It won’t count if I get the top spot only because you saved my best friend’s life and were knocked out the running because of it.”
I was enjoying her company more than I’d admit. She was the only one who seemed to care about her studies and magic as much as I did. Simon wasn’t going to class. He seemed unable to pull himself from the room for more than thirty minutes or so at a time. Food, shower, I assume to take a piss every so often. That’s it.
I loved it.
Nurse Printz was trying to balance out my diet. I wasn’t allowed to cast any magic, and I felt absolutely like I ran a marathon, got hit by a lorry during it, and then decided to run another.
It was with more effort than I’d care to admit that after four days, I was able to get up from my cot and sit on the bench by the window. I could almost make out the pitch from there. Fortunately, football was over for the season, but I longed to practice again.
Simon sat in the seat next to me. He didn’t stray from me the entire time I was standing. He was so close I could feel his body heat. It would have been enough to make me swoon, if it weren’t for my pride. I almost wanted to test it out and see if he’d catch me, but I didn’t want him calling for the nurse right now.
“Alright?” He asked as we both sat by the window.
It was one of the few times I was awake, and we were alone. I was still sleeping most of the day, which was extremely annoying.
“Yeah.” I replied.
He shifted uncomfortably. “We should talk, Baz.”
I sighed. My instincts were to deny and sneer or make some snide comment, but he was right. We should. Not to mention, my exhaustion just made me so tired of fighting.
“I suppose.”
That seemed to be all he could muster out. I forced myself to turn from the window to him.
“Simon, I-" I started.
“Don’t you ever do that again.” He interrupted, voice firm.
I blinked at him. He seemed to be turning an attractive shade of red.
“Pardon?”
He took a long slow breath. I could see him willing to calm himself down, I could almost hear him counting backward from ten.
His eyes met mine, and there was so much concern, so much fear, it nearly took my breath away.
“Baz, you have to promise me. No matter what happens, no matter how hurt I seem, you will never do that spell again.”
The confusion must have shown on my face, because he grabbed my hands and took another breath.
“When I came too, and you were lying there…” he visibly shuddered. “I’ve never been more afraid in my life.” His voice was uncharacteristically low.
“And Nurse Printz said he thinks you’ve casted it on me before. And maybe you have? And he said a third time might kill you.” He was blustering now, still holding my hands, but letting out puffs of air in between his sentences.
“Simon..” I started again.
“No, Baz. Baz. Please. I don’t want to hear anything until you promise me.”
I sighed.
“BAZ” He yelled, dropping my hands and standing up. At first I thought he was going to storm out, but he just started pacing back and forth, waving his arms around.
“What part of ‘might kill you’ are you not getting? Use that big brain of yours. I’m an injury prone menace, but you can’t go around casting that spell again.” His voice was breaking.
“I’m smart enough to use other spells first, Snow.” I said, trying to keep my voice logical. “It was a last resort. You would have died, both times. It was only ever a last resort.”
“Never again, Baz. It doesn’t matter if it’s a last resort.” He said, tears flowing now down his cheeks. “You’ll die, it’s not worth it.”
“You are worth it, Simon.” I said, with a whisper.
He let out something between a sob and a laugh and before I knew it, he was kissing me.
After a few minutes he broke a part and we both took a deep breath.
“You’re my soulmate” He said, with a reverence I had never heard before.
“It doesn’t have to be mutual.” I said quickly. “You don’t have too..”
He interrupted me.
“Shut up, Pitch.”
And then he was kissing me again.
"Promise me you won't use it." He said, between kisses.
"I won't use it, if you don't die." I whispered back.
I'm living a charmed life.
FIN
a/n: thank you for taking the time to read with me. It's always appreciated when someone takes the time to check out this fandom. You are all wonderful.