Chapter Text
“Nice serve!”
“Good one, Matsukawa!”
“Watch the back!”
“Sorry, that was my fault!”
Iwaizumi’s eyes followed the ball as it flew over the net into the other team's half. Unfortunately, it didn’t hit the ground and went back into the air after quite the save from the other team’s captain. Bouncing around a bit between the players, it finally got into the hands of the setter again but the spike was easy to predict. He jumped together with Oikawa in perfect unison and smiled when he felt the ball hit his fingers and it fell back into the other team’s court … onto the ground. A block-out.
The ref’s whistle echoed through the gym, ending the set and declaring Aoba Johsai as the winner.
“Nice, Iwa-chan!” Oikawa offered him a high five and Iwaizumi enthusiastically accepted it. Grinning from ear to ear, Oikawa pulled him into a short hug before turning to their other teammates to congratulate them on their performances.
It felt great to win again. The loss against Karasuno at the representative play-offs for the spring tournament still sat deep inside their brains and it had taken a lot of time, good words, and hard training to get them all back into a positive mindset.
Well … almost all of them.
While shaking the hands of the opposing team and thanking them for the good match, Iwaizumi couldn’t help but steal a few glances at Oikawa.
His friend hadn’t been quite the same since their defeat.
Not that Oikawa was a sore loser or didn’t know how to handle a loss - their many unsuccessful attempts at beating Shiratorizawa proved that he got better at working through the disappointment - but it was suspicious just how quickly he regained his composure and happy, childish attitude. Iwaizumi had thought he would need more time to fully digest their loss. When he tried to ask Oikawa about how exactly he managed to get over their defeat so easily, while after their games against Shiratorizawa it took Iwaizumi weeks and a lot of coaxing to get his friend back, Oikawa just laughed. He said, they still played a really good game and there was nothing to be ashamed or sad about.
Though Iwaizumi didn’t miss the weird, fiery look in his eyes when he added there would be more wins for them in the future.
He was planning something and Iwaizumi wasn’t sure if he liked it or not.
Oikawa was late as always. While Iwaizumi was smart and always tried to be the first one on the bus to get a good seat, Oikawa would hang around outside laughing and talking with fans or the bus driver. Today a few girls - “Not just girls, Iwa-chan! Fangirls!” - surrounded him and Iwaizumi could only roll his eyes as he watched the scene unfold through the window:
Four girls, two of them young enough to be in middle school, stood around Oikawa with hearts in their eyes as he most likely gave them a summary of today's game. They were gawking at him, squealing whenever he ran a hand through his hair or offered them a smile, but he patiently answered their questions, let them take pictures, and gave them autographs. Iwaizumi was fuming for a reason he didn’t quite understand ; it just irritated him so easily whenever the girls flung themselves at Oikawa as if he wasn’t a childish idiot with narcissistic tendencies.
The shithead sometimes treated his fangirls with more time and patience than his own teammates. So Iwaizumi decided to cut his little autograph session short. He banged his hand against the window to get Oikawa’s attention before yelling:
“Oi, shithead get your ass on the bus! Some of us want to get home!”
His friend gave his fangirls a sweet, apologetic smile before he excused himself. As he turned around, he stuck his tongue out to Iwaizumi and rolled his eyes. Iwaizumi just gave him a death glare and held up his right middle finger; the girls screamed in disbelief. If only they knew how their beloved ‘Oikawa-senpai’ acted when the cameras were turned off. Sometimes it was unfair how much attention the media and girls gave him considering Oikawa didn’t have the prettiest personality on their team by far. Unlike his teammates, Iwaizumi didn’t mind that much, however; better Oikawa than him, and besides … knowing how his friend truly acted gave him a strange sense of superiority over the annoying, probing press people.
“You’re so mean, Iwa-chan”, Oikawa said as soon as he boarded the bus and strutted toward Iwaizumi’s seat, “No wonder the girls always avoid you like the plague.”
He stopped next to Iwaizumi and stared at the empty window seat next to him, expecting his friend to move his legs or stand up so he could get past. But teasing Oikawa was just too much fun.
“Can I help you?”, Iwaizumi scoffed, moving more toward the edge of his seat to make it even more impossible to get past him.
Oikawa’s eyes narrowed before he let out a huff and pushed his leg against Iwaizumi’s to make it past him. He may be taller, but Iwaizumi would bet good money that he was stronger than his friend.
A quarrel ensued as Oikawa tried to get to his seat and Iwaizumi held him off. They always sat next to each other on the bus; they knew, the team knew, and even the bus driver knew. Still, they went through this ritual every single time, making their teammates sigh in annoyance.
“Cut it out, you two!” Matsukawa was the one to finally speak up for the rest of the team and he kicked his feet hard against the backside of Iwaizumi’s seat to underline his words. “Every single damn time, can you not once behave like high schoolers and not like little elementary school kids?”
Oikawa flopped onto his seat, but not without making sure his knee knocked against Iwaizumi one last time after he gave in and let him move past.
“Idiot”, he mumbled under his breath while Oikawa once again rolled his eyes and took out his phone to watch some videos. Iwaizumi grabbed the sandwich he got at the convenience store just a few meters from where their bus picked them up. You had to go right past it when you walked from the gym to their bus and yet he was already in the process of carefully ripping it in half when Oikawa, without looking up, held out his hand. They ate in silence: Oikawa watching some weird alien theory videos (luckily he didn’t forget his headphones this time), while Iwaizumi flipped through an athletic health magazine.
The ride back home would take them roughly two, maybe two and a half hours, depending on the traffic, and Iwaizumi used that time to wind down from the game and rest a bit. His teammates were either sleeping, playing cards, or listening to music and he couldn’t help but watch everyone he could see from his seat for a bit. The atmosphere was finally back to normal again after the silent, tense bus rides and anxious whispering during the past few weeks. All they had needed was a good win to get the ground back under their feet again. Iwaizumi had told them that countless times in the past week even though he was fighting with his own doubts and self-consciousness. But he was one of the oldest, the vice-captain even, he needed to be a good role model for the others. He needed to walk the rough path first, so the others could follow more easily.
He wished he could say the same about Oikawa.
True, his friend had also been rather optimistic and cheerful and tried his best to cheer up their teammates as well, but everyone could feel something was off. Something changed in him after that loss. If the game was so great and they couldn’t blame themselves for anything, why did he find Oikawa at the gym way past their curfew every single day?
Iwaizumi just knew him too well by now.
Oikawa was absently rubbing his right knee with a clenched fist while staring at his phone watching yet another conspiracy theory video. The seats were small and almost all of them were rather tall so it was always a challenge to fold your limbs in a way where they were neither in the way nor in an uncomfortable position. Since Oikawa always took the window seat, Iwaizumi could stretch his legs out into the aisle (which earned him the occasional annoyed grunt from a teammate having to walk over them) while Oikawa mostly sat with his legs propped up against the seat before him, balancing his phone on his thighs. Today though he was rather skittish. For a few minutes, his legs were propped up, until he put them down again to stretch them a little under the seat in front of him, before moving back to a regular sitting position. Always subconsciously rubbing his knee.
Iwaizumi watched him closely, suddenly feeling sick to his stomach when he thought about their little fight over the seats. He hadn’t thought about his friend’s bad knee, because their squabbles were always harmless, but had he been too forceful this time? Had he overdone it? He knew how much the knee bothered Oikawa, more in his head than physically, and though it was mostly his friend’s own fault for getting it to the state it was now, Iwaizumi didn’t want to worsen it.
A sharp intake of breath together with Oikawa’s fingers digging into his skin for a moment was what finally broke Iwaizumi out of his thoughts.
“Does your knee hurt?”
It was more of a rhetorical question because it was pretty damn obvious but Iwaizumi’s heart clenched so much he didn’t know what else to say. Oikawa needed a second to realize hewas talking to him before a sheepish smile spread across his lips, his hand immediately letting go of his knee to wave through the air.
“Oh, is Iwa-chan worrying about me? Are you finally acknowledging your feelings?”
Feelings? What the fuck-
“I don’t want to lose a game because you idiot wanted to play the hero. So, I ask you again: Does your knee hurt?”
“It’s a bit sore”, Oikawa confessed, because he knew arguing about this would get him nowhere, “It was an intense game after all, but nothing to fuss about, Iwa-chan! You will still be able to marvel at my serves!”
He still smiled brightly and patted Iwaizumi’s shoulder to reassure him that everything was fine. Iwaizumi didn’t believe him for a second.
“How long has it been hurting for?”
“Uh, I don’t know.”
Oikawa avoided eye contact now; rather fumbling with the cords of his headphones than meet his friend’s gaze.
“How long, Shittykawa?”
“Mean, Iwa-chan!”, he protested, but got shut down by Hanamaki clearing his throat behind them, so he added: “Maybe since yesterday?”
He looked back at Iwaizumi again, who held a steady death glare.
“Wednesday?”, Oikawa tried again, but Iwaizumi’s death glare remained.
“Okay, okay, for over a week, geez!” The setter finally confessed, throwing up his hands in defeat, “No need to be so scary!”
Iwaizumi couldn’t help but notice how the tension left his shoulders now that he knew their little quarrel was not the reason Oikawa had problems with his knee again. He had just overdone it again and honestly he had it coming.
The idiot got rewarded for his self-harming behavior because now, after the hard training he pushed himself through the past week, he jumped a little higher, hit the ball a bit harder, and targeted a bit more precisely and that was enough to drown out the warning signals his body screamed at him. The pain in his leg, the soreness in his muscles, the monsters in his head. Iwaizumi had found him on the ground of the bathroom in front of the toilet a couple of times in the past weeks after Oikawa pushed himself so far past his limits that his body couldn’t handle it anymore.
“I told you not to overdo it!”, he growled and watched Oikawa shrink into himself at the harsh tone in his voice, “When will it get into your thick skull that your actions have consequences? I mean at some point a learning effect has to kick in even with you. Do you want to cripple yourself? Is this like a challenge to you?”
Silence.
Oikawa just looked at him with big eyes and an unsure expression on his face, while behind them a faint ‘damn’ could be heard from Matsukawa. Realizing his words came out a bit stronger and harsher than he intended, Iwaizumi tried to backpedal immediately:
“Sorry, I didn’t mean it that way.”
“Oh no, you’re right”, Oikawa’s voice was weirdly hollow, “It’s my own fault.”
“No - I mean yes, but …” Goddamnit what had he gotten himself into. “Just try to listen to me for once, okay? It’s just frustrating having to watch what you do to yourself.”
He put his hand on Oikawa’s right hand because showing what he meant had always been easier for him than words. Oikawa smiled at him again and Iwaizumi let out a sigh of relief.
“Anything for you, Iwa-chan!”, he replied and Iwaizumi knew this had nothing to do with what he just said but any kind of answer was better than none.
“Do you want to put your legs on my seat? Stretch’em out a bit?”
Iwaizumi sounded weird even to his own ears but Oikawa’s squirming next to him would drive him up the walls otherwise. And he also wanted to make sure Oikawa wasn’t upset with him.
“On your lap?”
Oikawa for once sounded neither teasing nor cocky but genuinely surprised. The moment was short-lived though.
“Sure!”, he beamed and just a heartbeat later he elegantly draped both his legs over Iwaizumi’s lap, his feet slightly reaching into the aisle.
After a few minutes, Iwaizumi found himself absently massaging Oikawa’s right knee with his left hand while playing a game on his phone with his right. Oikawa was back to watching terrible videos and only hummed approvingly whenever Iwaizumi found an especially sore spot.
Iwaizumi couldn’t tell how long they were sitting in silence like that but the next time he looked up from his phone the sun was already setting and they were stuck in some traffic on the highway. And Hanamaki and Matsukawa behind him were talking about him.
“Oh look at him”, Hanamaki sighed, “So hard and rough to the others, but so soft and tender for dear Oikawa-san.”
Matsukawa nodded in agreement and added:
“Beating the shit out of him every single day, but as soon as Oikawa has a request he’s panting like the obedient little puppy that he is.”
“I’m not a puppy!”, Iwaizumi growled, turning around to glare at them through the crack between the seats, “And I don’t turn all soft and tender!”
His two teammates just shared a knowing look and shook their heads in unison.
“If you’re that deep in denial even we can’t help you.”
“Hopefully one day you will realize yourself, Iwa-chan.”
“Don’t call me -” Iwaizumi’s ears turned red when he caught himself validating their words. His teammates just chuckled, while he decided to ignore them. Well, proving how wrong they were should be easy enough.
“Okay that's enough, shithead, you can go back-“
Iwaizumi looked up only to be greeted by the sight of an asleep Oikawa. His back was still propped up against the bus window, his arms crossed in front of him, while his chin rested on his chest, eyes closed.
“Shitty-kawa that fake sleep tactic won’t work with me!”, Iwaizumi hissed, tapping the setter’s knee, but Oikawa remained unmoving.
His breathing was deep and steady and his muscles completely relaxed. Shit, he was really asleep. Really, really asleep.
Well, at least the idiot got the rest he deserved and needed. Oikawa rarely fell asleep after a game, most of the time he was still too pumped up by adrenaline to calm down enough to rest. It was a nice sight to see him so sound asleep for a change. Sunrays were dancing across his face, lighting up his features and his hair, and Iwaizumi couldn’t help but stare for a moment.
“Oikawa!” A voice boomed through the bus and Iwaizumi jumped and hastily looked away.
It was one of their new first years sprinting down the aisle with a gleeful smile on his lips only to be met by Iawaizumi’s standard death glare and a hand to the stomach to stop him from coming closer. The first year, Iwaizumi was never as good as Oikawa at remembering new people’s names, stopped perplexed in his tracks until he noticed the setter’s sleeping form.
“If you wake him, I will break your legs and have you run after the bus!”, Iwaizumi barked but was still trying to keep his voice low.
“Not so harsh, Iwaizumi”, another teammate yelled as the kid paled and took a step back.
“I just thought, I could catch him alone for a second. He’s always so busy with the team, I-“
“Like I said: Wake him and …”
“Soft and tender”, Hanamki whispered behind him, Matsukawa snickering next to him, and Iwaizumi’s cheeks flushed in an instant. Out of reflex, Iwaizumi looked back at the sleeping Oikawa before turning back to the first year:
“You watched the game, right? Sitting on the bench, getting a good look at everything, yeah?” The kid nodded his head in excitement. “Well, imagine standing on the court for the entire time and keeping track of the opponents and their teammates. You would be very fu-” Someone cleared their throat. “-fricking tired. So, why don’t you back off and we have this conversation at a better time or I make you run after the bus with all the energy you seem to still have?
“Okay, okay!” The first year raised his hands in defeat and scurried off.
Hanamaki and Matsukawa snickered behind him and Iwaizumi ignored them. Soft and tender … pfff.
Carefully, not to wake his sleeping friend, he got himself into a more comfortable position as well. After all, he couldn’t always preach a healthier lifestyle to Oikawa if he didn’t act like a good role model.
And seeing his friend sleep so peacefully made him drowsy anyway.
The leg beneath Iwaizumi’s hand twitched suddenly, jerking him awake from his half-sleep. He immediately looked up to Oikawa but his friend seemed to be in deep slumber still. His head had dropped down a bit more as more tension had left his body and his chest still rose and fell in a steady rhythm. His legs moved again ever so slightly before they stilled and instead his hands in his lap twitched as his body tensed. It took Iwaizumi a second to realize what his friend was probably dreaming about:
The idiot practiced his serves even in his sleep.
Iwaizumi knew that volleyball meant a lot to Oikawa, so much in fact that it was far more than a healthy obsession (Hitting serves in his dreams? That just screamed pure addiction at him), and Iwaizumi always wondered what would happen once their high school days would officially end. What if Oikawa’s dream of becoming a professional elite volleyball player won’t work out? What if all the training and hard work he put into his body weren’t enough to get a stipend at a university or make the jump from a high school star setter into the professional league? Iwaizumi knew Oikawa didn’t like to think about that possibility and denied it so hard that the option plain out didn’t exist for him anymore.
Still, Iwaizumi was scared for the future. Not for himself. He knew that he was good and could with enough training and determination maybe continue playing volleyball after Highschool but in the span of the last year he realized that that was not where his true passion lay. Being a professional volleyball player surely sounded nice, but other than Oikawa, who lived for the passion on the court, Iwaizumi grew to like the action behind the scenes more - the training camps, the tactic boards, the fitness plans - which was why he thought about studying sports medicine.
“Athletic training and sports psychology? Exercise science?” Oikawa had looked at Iwaizumi with a cocked eyebrow and an ‘Are you sure?’ - look when he read the possible topics Iwaizumi could major in once he had told his friends about his idea for the future. “Sounds reeeally lame and boring, you know? You sure that’ll keep you entertained?”
“Yeah, I could finally learn how to keep stubborn idiots with an ego problem from overexercising themselves.”
“Oh, so you finally won’t hit me anymore? Are you instead going to reason with me? With facts and logic? I like to see that, Iwa-chan!”
“I never said I wouldn’t hit some sense into you.”
Oikawa had just laughed at that, while Iwaizumi’s eyes had automatically wandered to his friend’s right knee. It would be nice to find a way to help him with his recurring problems.
Oikawa’s legs moved again and Iwaizumi ran a soothing hand over his right knee, gently massaging the tense muscles, as his friend hit yet another serve in his dream.
Iwaizumi would be there of course to catch his friend and bash some sense into him. Life went after all but … What would be left of the Oikawa he knows now?