Chapter Text
She… she had done nothing wrong. Catholic guilt is a bitch.
Those were the thoughts in Lena’s head as she wandered down the hallway to Kara’s apartment - cookies in hand, freshly showered, ready for a movie night that would no doubt result in the two women cuddling in bed together as they fell asleep, Lena agonizing over what could never happen with her straight best friend.
Things felt so settled now, so final. Oddly calm after Lex and Nyxly had been dragged to the phantom zone. Kara and Lena had worked so hard to repair their friendship - and with each step closer they took, the pain in Lena’s chest would flare, the aching desire for something more and knowing she could never have it.
Her friendship had rebuilt with Andrea, too. It took practice, learning to forgive, learning to see the fears and circumstances that can drive one to do unforgivable things. But it only felt right, to learn to give others grace, for all the grace her friends had given her.
She didn’t expect to fall into bed with Andrea that morning. It felt like an apology, an absolution. It felt like a way to calm her desperate body down before she went to see Kara. And in the aftermath, it had been clear to both Lena and Andrea that this wasn’t a flame that could be rekindled. But there was kindness and there was friendship, and there was a tranquility as Lena approached Kara’s door.
The knob turned when Lena was three steps away, Kara opening the door with her characteristic smile, clearly having picked up on Lena’s heartbeat or footsteps with her superhearing. It made something warm and fuzzy bubble up in Lena’s chest, how eager Kara was to see her.
“Hey!” Kara said cheerfully, as Lena stepped inside, Kara’s arms going around Lena’s shoulders in a hug, Lena grabbing tightly in return as Kara continued, “So I was thinking we could watch Labyrinth? It’s classic, Davie Bowie and puppets-”
And then Kara froze.
Lena frowned in confusion, stepping back as their hug suddenly finished, Kara’s eyes darting between Lena’s with a shocked expression, a hint of red rising in her cheeks.
“Darling? Are you okay?”
“Y-yeah,” Kara said, shaking off her sudden nerves like a dog. “Uh. Movie?” Kara said, her demeanor almost back to normal.
Lena smiled - confused, but sufficiently soothed. “Labyrinth sounds fine.”
So they popped some popcorn, unpacked the cookies Lena brought, and took their seats on the couch for the movies to begin. But… something was off, Kara somehow tucked to the opposite side, only their feet lightly touching instead of the usual cuddling up against each other, arms wrapped around or someone’s head on someone’s thigh.
Lena looked up as the movie played, missing the warmth, wondering where the familiarity had suddenly gone. Kara’s eyes were on the screen, but it seemed her mind was wondering, and Lena was itching to know why.
Lena turned back to the TV, letting the movie play, her mind searching. Kara had seemed totally normal in the Tower the previous day, when they had decided on a movie night. And normal when she opened the door, even. Until they hugged…
Oh.
Lena could feel the tempo of her heart increase, as she mulled the possibilities. Superstrength, yes. But also superhearing. Supervision…
Fuck.
“Lena?” Kara asked, her eyes - now concerned - on the brunette, no doubt due to Lena’s racing heartbeat. “Are you okay?”
Lena leaned forward, grabbing the remote and pausing the movie, before leaning back again.
“You… you have superscent?” Lena asked, eyes firmly on the coffee table rather than Kara’s face. But she didn’t need to look to know that Kara’s eyes were widening.
“I, um…”
“Even…” Lena swallowed. “Even after I showered…”
“It’s barely there, Lena,” Kara said softly. “And it’s not my business.”
The gentleness in Kara’s voice finally gave Lena the bravery to look up. “I- I don’t have to spend the night, Kara,” Lena whispered.
Kara’s eyes widened. “No! No, Lena, it’s not- it doesn’t bother me-”
“It does,” Lena said simply. “That- that’s okay, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable-”
“I’m not uncomfortable!”
“You’re all the way across the couch,” Lena said dryly.
Kara’s shoulders fell, in seeming realization - that in her pensive state, she hadn’t been as physically affectionate as usual, she had pulled back instead - “Oh Rao, Lena, that’s not what I meant.”
Lena bit at her lip, looking down, swallowing hard in an effort to remain composed. I should go home.
“It’s just, I thought you were straight, and…”
“I get it, Kara.”
“And I’m jealous.”
Lena blinked, looking back up, to a Kara whose face was red with embarrassment but whose eyes were clear with resolve. Kara had long ago promised to stop hiding things, as uncomfortable as it may be, and Lena knew how hard Kara was fighting against her instincts. “There is nothing wrong with you,” Kara said vehemently. “I just need to get my feelings for you under control. That’s all.”
Feelings for me? Lena blinked again. “Don’t.”
“Don’t what?” Kara asked, confused.
“Don’t get your feelings under control.”
Kara’s brow crunched, confusion, before shifting into the slightest tinge of hope. “But you’re with-”
“I’m not. And we were both very clear on that. I’m not with her. It was a goodbye more than anything.”
“Oh,” Kara said, her eyes widening, the hope turning into the barest hint of a smile. “Really?”
“Really,” Lena said firmly.
Kara shifted a bit on the couch. “I-” She looked down on her knees, thoughtful. “I’m going to ask you out tomorrow. Properly. With flowers and everything.”
Lena grinned. “I’m going to say yes.”
Kara glanced up, smiling back. “Movie?”
“Of course.”
Lena pressed play again, the two falling into their normal habits - Kara’s head ending up in Lena’s lap, as Lena combed her fingers through her hair, before they eventually ended up in bed, for their very last platonic sleepover.