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The asari commando stepped closer to Shepard.
“No really,” she said breathlessly, “if there’s anything you need at all, I’m happy to…accommodate.”
Behind her, Tali and Ash glanced at each other.
Shepard clapped the asari on the shoulder. “It’s the least I can do.I appreciate that, but don’t mention it.”
The asari grasped where Shepard’s hand met her shoulder. “And if I do mention it?”
Tali nudged Ash, who had turned pink. She nudged Tali back. Tali nudged her again.
Ash coughed. “Sorry Commander,” she said, trying to keep her voice stoic, “but we need to get going to look at. That thing. That store with the gun.”
Shepard looked at Ash, and then brightened. “You mean the new Carnifex? I had no idea it was in stock.”
“Uh, yeah. I think it…is?” Ash scratched the back of her head.
Shepard turned back and dropped the asari’s hand to step back in line with her squad. “Best of luck here,” Shepard told her, “but I should go.”
The asari looked crestfallen as Shepard turned to stride off, Tali and Ash in her wake.
--
Vega’s mouth was hanging open as the Sha’ira began to proposition Shepard.
Wrex harrumphed. “Might want to pick your jaw back up.”
“Shit,” Vega breathed out, “Lola’s got a lot of competition.”
Sha’ira gently picked up Shepard’s hand and gave it a kiss.
Wrex squinted at him. “You should see the waitlist she’s got back on Tuchanka.”
Vega swung his gaze to Wrex. “You’re joking. Wrex, you’re joking right?”
Wrex just laughed.
--
“Do you think she knows?” Garrus asked, plopping down next to Tali.
They had watched as Kaidan, and then Liara, had both cornered Shepard in the corridor leading to the mess hall.
Shepard was a hard read at the best of times. She wasn’t perfect and had her tells, but for a human, who were usually so expressive, Tali often had a hard time figuring out her more subtle expressions.
It was also very inappropriate to speculate about a superior in such a manner, even if it had crossed her mind…
Tali watched Liara and Shepard for a moment longer. “If she does,” she said, finally, “she’s very good at pretending she doesn’t.”
--
Shepard pulled Kasumi down into cover. Kasumi always noticed the smaller details everyone else usually missed, but this close she could really appreciate the faint scar tissue across her chin, how bright Shepard’s eyes were as they looked over her with concern, how deep her voice dropped to ask Kasumi if she was okay.
Kasumi nodded, no sly comeback for once.
And then Shepard was gone, vaulting over the barrier.
Behind Kasumi, Zaeed wolfwhistled.
Kasumi stuck up her middle finger in his direction, and then activated her tactical cloak to follow after the Commander.
--
Shepard greeted the reporter. “Let me show you around the rest of the ship.” The reporter blushed, and then stepped in line with Shepard, paying rapt attention as they left the cockpit.
There was a moment’s silence.
“Jeff,” EDI began, “I have noticed that a great deal of individuals seek out Commander Shepard for both physical and romantic intimacy.”
“Oh boy,” Joker muttered, “yeah you could say that.”
“I have never seen an individual human so coveted by other species, yet Shepard never signifies any reciprocal interest.”
“You know, I really don’t want to think about the Commander in this way.”
EDI paused, then spoke again. “Thank you for that data, Jeff. I shall add it to my hypothesis.”
“Your what? EDI? EDI?”
EDI didn’t respond.
--
Aria T’Loak shifted closer to Shepard, placing a hand on her knee.
Garrus looked away politely, eyeing Miranda next to him, who was impatiently drumming her fingers against an untouched drink.
Miranda noticed him staring and glared at him.
Shepard leant forward to mutter something back to Aria. Their lips were almost touching.
“Come on,” Miranda said, “let’s give them some privacy.”
Garrus wondered if he should warn her that this is what you got when you traveled with the Commander.
Nah , he decided, she’ll find out soon enough.
--
“You think there’s a person in this galaxy that hasn’t tried to hit on our Commander?” Was Jack’s opening comment as she leant against the countertop, watching Chambers flutter her eyes up at Shepard.
Thane blinked. Jacob coughed.
Jack swiveled her head between them, and then barked out a laugh. “Shit, I guess that’s my answer then.”
--
“Fascinating. Have been studying responses and arousal to Shepard across different races. Humans not known for universal attraction, but Shepard treated as outlier. Looking further into it - physiological responses not what one would expect. Have different samples -”
“Mordin,” Jacob interrupted him, “It doesn’t really - wait samples?”
Mordin blinked owlishly at him.
“Nevermind, don’t answer that.”
--
Traynor sat down at the table, blushing faintly. Ashleigh sighed.
“She got you too, huh?”
Traynor looked up at Ash.
Ash waved her hands vaguely. “Shepard. The Commander. Hot as hell and has anyone near her tripping over their feet.”
“Oh!” Traynor blushed harder. “It’s just - she’s very - I mean I’ve always been into women, you understand - not that that has anything to do with anything - I’ve just never really met anyone like -”
Traynor clapped her hands over her mouth.
Ash patted her shoulder sympathetically.
“Let me guess,” Ash said, “you’ve never met anyone like Shepard?”
“Oh bollocks.” Traynor swore, putting her head in her hands. “I’m doomed.”
--
“Personally,” Cortez shrugged, wiping down the Hammerhead, “I don’t see it.”
“Ah Esteban,” Vega sighed, “I suppose not. It’s those hips. And those arms. Not often a woman comes around that could best me in a fight.”
He raised his voice, calling out to the other side of the cargo hold. “Ain’t that right, Scars?”
“That’s our commanding officer you’re talking about!” Garrus yelled back.
“Ain’t that a turn-on for turians?” Vega yelled.
The silence was deafening.
--
They were in Shepard’s new apartment, celebrating for a moment before the final push.
“Blasto!” Shepard was saying. “ The Blasto! I can’t believe it!”
Tali shook her head. “Keelah, Shepard, I can’t either. Did you at least put in a good word for me?”
“Well,” Shepard frowned down into her drink, “not really. It was strange, actually, he mostly seemed to want my autograph and also…”
Shepard hesitated, swirling her straw in her drink.
“What is it, Shepard?” Liara asked from her other side.
“I mean if I didn’t know any better,” Shepard laughed nervously, “I’d say he wanted to sleep with me.”
Shepard expected her friends and former crew to make fun of her. Instead, they all just sighed.