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can i breathe (without suffocating)?

Summary:

Red has seen stories and myths about this disease, a stupid book he picked up to kill time, where one falls in love so deep it starts to eat them from the inside. Hanahaki, they called this (not-so) fictional illness.

It can be broken with a surgery, removing all memory of the person, but Red doesn't really want to forget the guy they're making a potential alliance with, he tells himself.

 

(It can also be broken by resolving your feelings. Red doesn't dwell on that.)

(or, Red has spent his whole life training to be first heir to the throne. It takes a man he has met less than five minutes ago for everything to fall apart.)

Notes:

haii roses n smoke week 2024!!
im gonna be uploading a chapter each day (skipping day 3 & 6 cause i have no ideas for them) and its all gonna be in the same storyline ^_^

day one: roses/smoke
cw for mentions of blood & light swearing!! lmk if i need to add any ^_^

ALSO this is so insanely ooc. they would never do any of this

Chapter 1: one

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The first thing that catches Red's eye, as he steps into the dining hall, are the two families, sat on either side of the grand table that separates them.

 

Right. The marriage. Between Parrot and some guy from the other family. A subtle eye roll instinctively surfaces. For an "alliance", or whatever.

 

Red's faith in his family to uphold the treaty is about as much as he'd like to take father's place on the throne. In other words, absolutely none. The opposing family doesn't seem much better at all- except the one that catches his eye.

 

A young man looking away, completely uninterested in the current conversation between the two sides. A window is (miraculously) positioned perfectly to let the sunlight accent his features, highlighting his bronze skin. His hair is tied into a long braid, fading into a dark purple at the ends, and Red can see him try to inconspicuously rest his grown-out bangs behind his ear, much to no avail.

 

He looks like he wants to be here even less than Red does.

 

Red has been careful to skip these meetings, and avoid any conversations regarding this topic. A poorly-timed foreign affairs discussion with the House of Pierce from the neighboring kingdom here, a check-up on the military and borders there. 

 

Point is, this is going to be his first time officially meeting the other family, much to his dismay. He would've tried to skip, but direct orders from his parents have ended him up here. Something about how he's going to be the next leader and he has to "take responsibility instead of avoiding it". That kind of bullshit.

 

As soon as Red steps into the banquet hall, black leather tapping lightly on the cold wooden flooring, the attention is on him. Painting on a welcoming smile, Red dips his head in acknowledgement, trying his best to seem content to be here. His cousin and the future groom, Parrot, shoots him a glance and a small but reassuring smile, but it's clear as day to Red, after 17 years of living together, that he does not want this at all.

 

Curse the damn contract.

 

The teen, with everyone else, glances towards him, and immediately has to turn away, poorly disguising his laughter with a cough.

 

Great. First meeting, and he's already being laughed at. At least someone's not serious about this meeting, his brain tries.

 

"Red Doons!" Red cringes at the use of his full name, "Perfect timing, just as we're about to start," Father's voice booms in the room, "Meet the Swag family."

 

Red doesn't manage to catch anyone's name other than the teen's. Ash , he'd said awkwardly, tinted with an accent Red doesn't have the knowledge nor energy to place. Ash offers a hand to him, which Red takes shakily, heart palpitating throughout his body. 

 

His hand is soft. Really soft.

 

Red pulls his hand away before his face starts to burn up. The meeting starts, and Red smartly decides to tune out everything, only listening for his name. 

 

He occasionally glances at Ash, who has his head ducked, staring at each crack on the floor. If anyone sees Red staring longingly, well, nobody pointed it out.

 

The discussion ends after three painful hours, Red getting up immediately to stretch his sore legs. Just as he's about to leave this damn room, a hand settles on his shoulder and stops him in his tracks. 

 

"Red, dear, would you show our guests where they will be staying?" Red blinks. Right. They're staying here for the month.  

 

A smile plays on his lips. "Of course, mother. Please follow me."

 

Red drops the parents off at a double guest bedroom, and gestures towards the room next door for Ash. Instead of entering the room, however, Ash pipes up nervously.

 

"Could I- could I get a room that's not around this corridor?"

 

Red blinks, before tilting his head, "I mean, sure? It's not gonna be nearly as spacious but-"

 

"Doesn't matter," Ash waves his hand in the air, "Also, could you maybe not tell my parents about that arrangement?"

 

"Wow, getting rebellious, are we?" Ash opens his mouth to retort but Red raises a hand in the air, a finger on Ash's lips to keep his mouth shut, "Look, I don't care about your family drama, I've got enough of my own. All I'm doing is accommodating a guest's needs."

 

Red smirks and jerks his head in a direction, swiftly walking off. Ash is quick to follow behind, a set of footsteps barely tapping the floors, compared to Red's thumps. 

 

They arrive in front of Red's room, where he motions to the room next door, now for Ash.

 

"It's a bit of a distance away from your parent's room. Just make sure to wake up earlier than them so I don't get in trouble," Red stretches, entering his own room. Right before he shuts the door, Ash slips his fingers through the gap and catches the edge quickly.

 

Even Ash looks surprised at his own actions, before he quickly diverts his gaze and mumbles an apology. "Thanks," (Is that a smile on his face?) , "For uh- for letting me use this room."

 

Red blinks, all the air leaving his lungs for just a split second, "Yeah. No problem, man," He raises a thumbs up, which Ash laughs at.

 

His laugh is really pretty.

 


 

As they're eating dinner, Red finds it more difficult to swallow than usual.

 

He would say it was the pretty prince sitting right across him, violet bangs falling across his face as he eats, and Ash is definitely contributing to this problem. However, it wasn't just embarrassment from being near the guy. It was a very literal problem.

 

Red could feel thorns poking inside his esophagus.

 

Deciding to eat a smaller amount today, Red quickly excuses himself from the table, earning a few confused glances from his family. Usually, he had a larger appetite due to his training, calories burnt quickly from hours upon hours of sword fighting. Red expects to get some visits from his siblings later that night, but that was a problem for future him.

 

He dashes to the nearest bathroom, relief washing over him as he notices its vacancy. Two hands clutching around the sink, Red coughs as hard as he can. 

 

Bloodstained petals. He wipes the blood off with his thumb, mind numb. Silky. Curved. Purple.

 

God damn it.

 

Red has seen stories and myths about this disease, a stupid book he picked up to kill time, where one falls in love so deep it starts to eat them from the inside. Hanahaki, they called this (not-so) fictional illness. 

 

It can be broken with a surgery, removing all memory of the person, but Red doesn't really want to forget the guy they're making a potential alliance with, he tells himself.

 

(It can also be broken by resolving your feelings. Red doesn't dwell on that.)

 

And he just got lucky enough to get roses. Fucking roses. The pinnacle of a cliché romance that will never happen to him. One of the flowers with thorns lined all over its stem, hurting anyone that touches it without care. Purple roses, the exact national flower of the Swag kingdom.

 

Red groans in frustration, hands digging into his eyelids. He has met this guy for one day. 

 

Between coughs and hacks, the door opens, because speak of the devil, and he shall appear. Ash- fucking -Swag, with the audacity to look concerned for him.

 

(Red laughs between tears as he prepares to rest that night, knowing he could never, in a million years, hold anything against Ash. Especially not these feelings, no matter how far this secret sinks in his heart.)

 

"Hey," Red says coolly, like there aren't bloodstains in the basin.

 

"Dude, what the fuck." So forced royal etiquette and controlled language is out the window when it's just the two of them. Red feels intangibly flattered at the thought of Ash thinking they're close enough for that.

 

It's enough to make him smile like an idiot, even as he's suffocating.

 

"Dude," Ash is crouching in front of Red now, both hands clutching onto his wrists. Nothing Ash is saying goes through Red's head. 

 

Holy shit, Ash is nearly holding my hand, is all he can think.

 

One snap. Two snaps. Red blinks back into reality, Ash's hands now hovering over his cheeks and ready to shake him back into consciousness. 

 

"Your face is so warm. Nearly the same shade as your hair," Ash snarkily remarks, lavender eyes still glazed with worry, "Hanahaki? Seriously, dude? What are you, 15?"

 

Red lightly slaps his hand away, "Bro, shut up ."

 

"Y'know they have surgery for this type of shit right? Having roses in your organs can't be fun," Ash picks up a petal, face softening.

 

Red hums. "I don't really wanna forget this guy," He says, half-truthfully. I really like him , he doesn't say.

 

Ash rolls his eyes, "Whatever bro. Just don't die on me. You're my only friend in this fucking kingdom."

 

A snicker. "We're friends?"

 

"You're the closest thing I have to one here," Ash scoffs, "Acquaintances, better?"

 

Red coughs into the sink again, washing the blood and petals down the drain. "Mm. Nah. I like friends."

 

"Asshole."

 


 

Later into the night, Red jolts awake as he realizes it's Ash that's getting married to Parrot.

 

In hindsight, it was obvious- he was the only person who was single that came from the other family. His disinterest in the conversations, despite being there. How the hell did he not piece this together earlier?

 

God fucking damn it.

 

He has a crush on the guy who's getting married to his cousin.

 

Red doesn't get any sleep that night.

Notes:

context: parrot & red are cousins for plot purposes. parrots parents died from accident™️ and reds family took him in. none of their parents are lifestealers, they are just random unnamed characters for plot.
thanks for reading!! ^_^ fingers crossed ill update this