Chapter Text
“It’s okay Clark, really,” Lana said in a most placating tone. She had the sheets up around her neckline and was brushing hair behind her ear that didn’t exist.
Clark was mortified. He was beat red in a blush so radiant that it crept down his neck and spread across his broad chest. His throat was in a knot and his stomach felt…sick.
“I…I didn’t know that I wasn’t normal…down there,” he almost squeaked.
“You are normal, Clark! You’re just…big. Bigger than the average man, but that doesn’t mean that you’re not normal!” Now Lana was the one wearing the blush.
Clark could tell that she wanted to escape and put all of this mess behind her. They had tried to have sex for the first time and it went abysmally. They’d kissed and caressed and undressed and Clark would - for the rest of his life - remember the look on her face when she saw his arousal.
The color had seeped right out of her face and her eyes lingered at his crotch for a long time. Still, she let him try…
He “warmed her up” with his fingers and because she was on the pill, she told him that he didn’t need to use a condom. He didn’t have one anyway…
As he was trying to “pleasure her” he felt clumsy and completely out of his depth. Even his fingers felt too large. He inserted one, and then a second - even a third. But when he lined up his cock to her entrance, it just wasn’t going to happen.
The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her, so at her first signs of discomfort, he stopped and flopped back on the bed. He scooted up to his headboard and drew the quilt up to his waist.
Mortified didn’t even begin to cover how he felt. The path before him (the future he’d envisioned) which previously contained multitudes of possibilities…splintered, crumbled and fell away. If he couldn’t show his love and affection to whoever was in his life, then he was truly, deeply isolated.
He cataloged the looks that flitted across her delicate features and swam in her green ocean eyes. Shock, assessment, resignation, conciliation and finally, defeat. At the realization that he could never be “normal,” his gaze drifted off to an unseen landscape. He stared vapidly at the adjacent wall and felt a roller coaster drop of dread swing him straight down.
Her warm hand on his cold shoulder drug him back to reality but it wasn’t a reality he wanted to occupy. She offered him alternatives but he politely declined as the moment wilted and putrefied. He mustered up what common sense and clear thinking he had left and reassured her that it was nothing she had done. The fault was not with her at all and he made that abundantly clear before suggesting they put themselves back together and go their separate ways for the day as he had to get busy picking up the shattered remnants of his dignity. But somehow he already knew that when he’d go to reach for his self-esteem, the jagged piece would slice him open straight from mind to heart before disintegrating entirely.
She slipped out of bed and gathered her clothes, putting each piece on silently. Clark did the same, grateful that his erection had disappeared beneath the weight of his embarrassment.
“There are other things we can try,” she said, sadly hopeful. “Hand stuff, mouth stuff,” she moved to kiss him and he mirrored the same conciliatory smile that she gave him and allowed her mouth to connect with his, despite not feeling it.
A whole lifetime of moping and brooding seemed to lay before him. He tried not to dwell on it as he walked downstairs with her and saw her off.
—-------+++++++------------
“Earth to Clark?”
Kent’s blue green eyes snapped up to take in his friend? Frienemy? Lex Luthor standing in front of him with a coffee in hand.
The warm afternoon light sliced through the Talon and Clark had been so in his head that Lex could have been talking to him for an hour and he’d not be able to tell you about what.
“Are you okay?” Luthor’s brows drew together and his pale hand reached out for the seat across from Kent and slid it out. He sat and set down his coffee, eyes peering at the mystery that was Clark Kent.
The younger man bit his lip and swallowed. A permanent frown had affixed itself to his beautiful face and a dark cloud hung over his countenance. It had to be apparent from a mile away that he was beyond miserable.
He tried to hide it when he was around Lana, but even their relationship felt awkward now. Like a sweater that used to fit but was accidentally put into the dryer and was now five sizes too small. Clark was so self conscious it was like he couldn't even remember how to breathe around her.
“You look like hell.”
That garnered a small smile from Kent.
“Thanks.”
“What’s wrong?”
Moment of truth. Should he tell Lex?
Just thinking about how to phrase what had happened was making Clark turn cherry red and feel his pounding heart in his knotted fist.
“God, must be serious,” Lex was looking more concerned by the minute. The silence that Clark had let hang in the air wasn’t helping.
To be honest, Clark was considering whether or not to open up to Lex. Their friendship had been a little rocky of late…but they were still friends. And it’s not like this was something he could just go to his parents with. He didn’t want to discuss it with Lana and Pete had moved away years ago so his options had dwindled down to Lex.
He drew closer, concaving his stomach so that he could fold into the wood surface. Luckily, the Talon was packed but no one was within their immediate orbit or earshot. It was loud enough to provide Clark cover if he wanted to be honest.
“I have a problem,” Clark reached for his giant mug of coffee. His hands were so large though that they made the yellow bowl of latte seem like a normal size.
“I’m a good problem solver,” Lex mirrored him, pulling in his chair and coming in close to listen. He could see that Clark was uncomfortable.
Luthor’s gray eyes were so earnest and sincere, his expression was open and he waited patiently for Clark to open up.
“I…I’m not normal,” Clark said sadly, words breaking even as they came out. “I tried to…I tried to do a normal activity,” he said cryptically, wondering if this would make any sense. “A bedroom activity,” he rushed those words out and flushed even further.
Lex’s eyes were dark with worry but he didn’t interrupt.
His fingers were fidgeting with the coffee mug and he sucked in a deep breath. He opened his mouth to speak but all that came out was a strangled noise. He tried to start again but wasn’t sure how to phrase what he was trying to say.
“If there’s an issue Clark, I have the best doctors on the planet,” Lex was offering gently.
“I appreciate it,” Clark smiled sadly, “but it’s not something a doctor can fix…”
“Are you sure?”
“100%”
“I don’t want to pry,” Lex said seriously, “truly, you can tell me to fuck right off but…would you feel better if you shared what the issue was? I might…I might be able to offer some other insight or help?”
Clark took another deep breath, steeling himself for just getting it over with.
“I…I think that…I mean I know that…I’m…I’m not…normal,” he almost choked on the word. “I looked up what other guys have. And what I have is…too big,” he finished, nearly sinking his face into his scalding hot coffee (not that it’d hurt him).
He glanced a peek at Lex to see his reaction and watched as Luthor veiled his dawning realization. Lex’s Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed but other than that, he remained perfectly still. Too still.
“I couldn’t even…fit inside,” Clark crumpled his body further, hunching in an attempt to just disappear into the table.
“Clark…” Lex started but knew he had to tread carefully. “Being big doesn’t mean that you’re not normal. There are plenty of men out there who are big.”
“Not this big,” his thumb accidentally broke a piece off the mug.
Beneath his cool exterior, Lex was sweating. This conversation had taken a wildly unexpected turn. Beneath the table his cock was so hard that it was leaking. His mind was going wild imagining just how “big” Clark Kent was. He hated how desperately he itched to discover this particular secret of Clark’s.
Clark didn’t even know that Lex was bi. How, he wasn’t sure as it was practically written on his forehead, but he was sure the thought had never occurred to Kent.
If only Clark knew that he was a bottom with a particular…kink…for large cocks. He’d probably fall right off the chair. That blush would catch fire and make his head combust.
“You want to know how big…” Clark muttered.
Shit, was a mind reader now too?
“I…” Lex faux shrugged his shoulders.
“Nine inches,” Clark said in a blur. “And not skinny either,” he coughed into his hand and looked around to make sure no one else was listening. He brought his coffee to his mouth to take a sip.
“Clark…you’re not a freak of nature, I can assure you. There are men who are that size. Even some…who are ten or eleven.”
“What?” he nearly spat out his coffee. “Really? How…I mean, how do they…you know?”
“There are things you can do to better prepare your partner,” Lex drank his own coffee. “Hell, I’m eight and I’ve intimidated partners so I sort of know how you’re feeling. I’ve had partners turn me down.”
“Really? What did you do?”
“I don’t take offense or get worried about it. I take more care in preparing the partner and may not go…all the way in. A lot of men who are a larger size also find that it’s easier to…” he paused now, unsure if he ought to shock the upstanding Kansas boy.
“Easier to what?”
“To have anal sex,” he said faintly, the words floating on a wisp of a hushed tone.
Clark kind of froze and Lex briefly wondered if he’d broken the young man.
Kent couldn’t fathom asking Lana Lang if she’d consider having anal sex.
“You know…the prostate is in the rectum,” Lex had already gotten wet so why not dive into the murky water. “It can be very pleasurable…”
“For…a male partner,” Clark was short-circuiting.
“Correct.”
“But…but it doesn’t really ‘do anything’ for women though?”
“It depends. Some really enjoy it and others really don’t enjoy it.”
“Hmm.” Kent seemed deep in thought and Lex so wished that he could just pry open a door to Clark’s mind and step inside. Obviously he had tried to fuck Lana and it hadn’t gone well. Was it duplicitous of him to plant the idea of gay sex in Clark’s mind? He didn’t think so… if Clark wasn’t interested in that, then a mere suggestion wouldn’t change that. That’s how he justified it anyway.
Deep down though, Lex was picturing Clark tossing him onto his purple silk sheets with his huge hands and prying him open to prepare him for that cock. He wondered what color the head was, if it had veins, how much he came and if he’d ever come hard. Really hard. Probably not.
Since his ‘attempt’ with Lana hadn’t worked, Lex surmised that Clark Kent remained a virgin. His mouth watered against his will. He was biting his lip and not aware of it.
“Maybe I could come by the mansion? You could teach me about preparing better? God, I don’t even know if there are condoms out there that are big enough. I can’t imagine that being with me would ever be pleasurable for anyone.”
“Of course you can come over. I’ll help you however I can,” Lex said - and he meant it. “And please don’t be so down on yourself. It absolutely can be pleasurable. Not all is lost, Clark.”
Kent’s eyes snapped up to his and he straightened quickly. “You don’t think it’ll…you think it’s done growing right?” he asked with terror.
Lex couldn’t help the light chuckle that he let escape. “Yes Clark, you’re probably done growing. Most are done by 19.” He watched as Clark relaxed and ran a hand through his hair.
“Thanks for helping me with this Lex, I really appreciate it,” he gave a real smile and that dark cloud that hung over his head started to break apart.
As they finished their conversation, setting a date for Clark to come over for some sort of “lesson,” Clark couldn’t dislodge Lex’s words from his mind. Some women liked anal. And men’s prostates apparently really enjoyed it.
As he watched Lex’s figure receding, black knee-length jacket swaying around his knees as he sauntered out of the coffee shop, he had a fleeting thought that his friend was “attractive.” Lex was eight inches…that wasn’t too far from his 9”. He felt like less of a freak.
He turned in his now chipped mug, apologizing and headed out. As he drove home, his mind conjured up an image of a naked Lex and he found his blood began to travel south. That was certainly a surprising development but he tried not to put any stock into it. Clearly he was just sexually frustrated. Right?