Missed Calls

by amarmeme

Summary:

Rylen follows his best mate from Kirkwall to work for the Inquisition. When Rylen finally answers one of the many missed calls from Cullen's sister Mia, he forges a bond he never expected to find with a woman he didn't even know existed.

Notes:

• For StarrShineGirl.

In advance I would like to apologize to anyone from Scotland. I tried to keep it tame -- Starkhaven isn't real but Scotland and its culture absolutely is. Please forgive me for any mistakes, they are purely that.

Any experts feel free to correct me. :)

I. 

There were seventeen missed calls on his roommate’s cell phone. 

At the end of his rope, Rylen held the offending device in his grip. It had been blaring a custom ringtone all afternoon – a pop song that gave him second-hand embarrassment hearing it the first time and by the last he had no desire to hear the fucking thing ever again. While he tried to turn off the ringer, another call came through from a saved contact named Mia. This woman had to be desperate to call so many times. Unfortunately, learning her name made Rylen sympathetic. 

This “Mia” was a person Cullen clearly knew, not just some casual he’d labeled with a description for reference later like blonde Hanged Man good head.

Despite his better judgement, Rylen slid up on the spazzy little icon of a bouncing green phone. He pressed the device to his ear, readying himself for an onslaught. 

“Hello,” he said, then dryly, “Cullen’s phone.” 

“So it's not the phone,” came a throaty woman's voice, not at all what he'd expected. Of course he envisioned someone shrill, what with the eighteen attempts. 

“Nae, he forgot it at home.” 

“And you're there when he's not,” she added, a question in her tone. But he didn't know who this Mia was for nothing, he wasn't about to share his life story for free. 

“That's the situation right about now, aye. We're all caught up I think.” 

He expected a huff, or a hang up, but the caller on the other end snorted like a piglet, then burst out in laughter. 

“Did ye really just snort at me?” 

“Like a prized suckling. It's been a long day.” Mia sighed into the phone, one of those pitchy, winding down ones where her voice started high in an “ah” and slid down register. The hairs at the back of his neck stood at attention – the horny bastards. 

“Can you tell him to please call me back? It's important.” 

“I can do that for ye, Mia.”

Really,  the fact would be obvious when Cullen looked at the call log. Rylen kept the thought to himself though. He'd already deployed the biting sarcasm once, no need to have her snorting at him again. 

“How did you–” she trailed off, then thinking better of it, sharply added, “right, the caller ID. Well, thanks for answering, I guess.” 

“Nae bother, good luck.” 

Rylen hung up, silenced the phone and got back to looking for a place to live. 

 

# 

8 Bloomingtide at 9:01 AM

 

Hello. It is Mia, from the phone call the other week.

I'm trying to get a hold of my brother and he’s not responding.

Y ou don’t happen to know where he’s at? 

 

9:37 AM

I swear I'm his sister and not a lunatic. 

 

—

 

Just because she was his sister didn’t mean she wasn't a lunatic. 

How she’d tracked him down without a name was kind of alarming. Rylen had mentioned Cullen’s missed calls the day he’d forgot his phone, and then hadn’t thought of the Mia woman since. But obviously she had spent time thinking about him. Rylen rarely used social media (something off-putting about documenting your entire life for strangers or people you didn’t care about enough to text), but kept up his Thedasbook for the instant messaging.  

Now he was paying the price for that decision. 

He lingered over his black coffee, trying to decide if he wanted to reply or not. Personal drama was not something he sought out. Cullen had been good enough to let him crash at his apartment until he found some place better, but there were limits to friendship, even with your best pal. 

He groaned, palming his face and looking up at the ceiling light like it had some wisdom or could blind him from ever seeing the messages. 

By now, she would have known he read them. He wasn’t a complete arsehole – he felt bad she kept missing her brother, and really, he hadn't known Cullen had a sister named Mia to begin with. It was only this that made him pick up the phone again and reply. 

—

 

8 Bloomingtide at 10:15 AM

So how did ye find me then? 

 

Oh, thank the maker. 

I just searched his friends on Thedaspp for Starkhavener names. 

I know enough about Starkhaven to realize you weren't Sebastian Vael.

How does my brother even know him ? 

 

Ach, fucking accent did me in 

They have a mutual friend 

 

You don't like answering questions do you? 

 

Yer brother’s at work right now

It’s the morning ye ken

 

You’re not working.  

 

Nae. 

Different shift. 

We hardly see each other right now

 

Oh.

Are you together? Partners? 

 

How can we be partners if we’re on different shifts? 

 

I'm sorry. that's not what I meant. 

Sorry. I shouldn't have assumed.

 

He’s a bonnie lad, I'll give ye that

but, nae, I'm just given ye a hard time 

 

😑😑😑😑

Well you seem made for each other, which could mean nothing. 

 

Heh. He's working so that’s likely why he's nae responding

Need anything else

 

Why? Would you actually do it if I said yes to that? 

 

Depends 

I'm known tae be helpful 

 

Just not with me. 

 

What do ye mean? 

I’ve done everything ye asked for me so far 

 

Remind me again.

 

Told him ye called a few weeks back

Told ye he was working now 

See? 

 

Omm 😆

I should find you so insufferable.

 

But ye don't 

Shut up. 

 

7:12 PM

I shouldn't have told you to shut up. I realize the error of my ways now.

 

I told ye I would do what ye asked 

 

I'm not used to men behaving like I ask them to. 

 

Behaving by listening to ye?

Hmm. Don't like that  

 

Anyway...

Thank you for making me realize I was being a little much this morning.

 

Not sure how I did that but I'll take a thanks 

 

He messaged me on a break. I really was overreacting. 

I tend to think the worst is going on when I hear 🦗🦗🦗

 

Camping must drive ye mad then

 

I take back my thanks, sir. 

I want to form a complaint with your supervisor…

 

Ha... 

Right now it's yer bonnie brother 

So just get him back on the phone and tell him I've been sassin ye 

He's verra serious about work ye ken 

Good at paperwork 

📋📎✒️

—

 

When Rylen got back to the apartment after his shift, Cullen was already passed out for the night. It was near midnight and the first shift started at five; Rylen really hadn't seen much of the man since moving in. 

He chuckled to himself, thinking of Cullen's sister panicking that she’d been left in the dark about one more facet of her brother’s life. Maybe Rylen should have put on that they were lovers, seen how long it would go before Cullen asked him to stop in that long-suffering way of his, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. It would have been worth the laugh. 

Ah well, he still didn't mind messaging her in the morning, and all through his break. It wasn't his business why Cullen hadn't mentioned a sister, though it seemed like a big thing to hide. Rylen was not going to ask. He still didn't want to get into personal business, and he didn't plan on continuing on with Mia. Odds were he wouldn't hear from her again after today. 

# 

 

23 Justinian at 7:27 AM

 

Hi again, sorry. 

Can you just please reassure me my stupid brother hasn't fallen ass-first off the face of Thedas? 

It’s been ten days and I really did not want to bother you again. 

But I'm worried about him. 

 

9:45 AM  

Not tae sound like a broken record but he's at work 

 

Okay

thanks

3:42 PM 

Hey, stranger.

I didn't mean to be abrupt earlier.

 

I'm about tae clock in but are ye doing alright? 

 

I’m fine. 

Don't want to be used to this sort of thing. 

🤷🏼‍♀️

I’ll keep an eye out for ye 

 

Thank you, I appreciate you saying that. 

I don't know you, but you seem like a solid friend. 🫵🏼🫰🏼

 

24 Justinian at 9:50 AM 

I feel like I'm always apologizing to you. 

Which is crazy since we have not met and I haven't done anything wrong. 

 

Good morning 

 

What's going on? 

Is he okay? 

 

Why do ye think something’s wrong? 

 

Right.

I forgot you're incapable of answering direct questions. 

 

I’m trying tae help ye without saying anything out of turn 

This is a difficult spot tae be in 

 

So something is wrong.

 

I dinnea say that, Mia 

Ye said ye “don’t want to be used to this sort of thing”

which means ye definitely are 

So what's abnormal this time that has your hackles up? 

 

Hackles? 

 

Spider senses, intuition, what have ye 

What's making ye so worried now?  

 

10:33 AM

ugh. I typed this over so many times and I hate it.
I read the news.
I'm aware of what you all have been through in Kirkwall and I can't imagine how hard things must actually be.
He's always been the distant one, but our baby sister is getting married and we've heard nothing.
No congrats or I'll be there or anything, he hasn't even read the messages we've sent.
I know I can be a lot, but Rosalie is his favorite and this seems like something else is going on.
I would bet everything I have that you didn't even know who I was until I told you.

 

10:46 AM  

I also had tae think about what tae say tae ye

I’m nae wantin tae get in anyone's business but I hear ye 

 

Yeah?

 

Shoulda typed up a massive thought before sending

 

I will be patient. 

I swear. 

 

Look, Mia ye seem like a good person trying tae watch out for her family

I can’t tell ye tales out of school, but ye aren't entirely without merit 

I’ll leave it at that, ye read the news ye said 

There's some things that weigh heavy on all of us right now and ye brother has had big responsibilities 

 

Can I call you? 

Please? 

 

that’s nae the best idea 

 

I promise to respect anything you can't say. 

 

We'll have a lot of dead air between us then 

 

I feel like I'm going crazy. 

Please.

—

 

Despite the distinct, colorful warnings flashing through his mind, Rylen started a call between them on the messaging app. Just voice, he didn't need to see her. 

He had so many reservations about this – but his sympathy overrode his usual good sense about boundaries. The “please” shook him, an instinct to help impossible to ignore.  

“Hey, stranger,” came the voice he'd only heard once before. Already, these words slithered and sank into his brain, sending out a rush of satisfaction down his spine. He felt a little bad about thinking she had a sexy voice. “Sorry to be so needy. You must think I'm a mess.” 

“Nae, I dinnae think that.”

Even if he did he'd not tell his best pal’s sister so. 

“I am though, there's always something to worry about and I feel like I'm the only one who’s worrying. Which means I'm probably paranoid.” 

“Look, I'm nae therapist and I cannae tell ye whether that's normal or nae, but I’m going to go on a limb here and guess yer the oldest.” 

She laughed softly and his entire body clenched. Maker, this was a shite idea, talking to her. 

“You'd be right. It's me, then Cullen, and then Branson and Rosalie are much younger. I think our parents were insane for doing it that way, but they died when Branson was eleven and Rosalie nine.” 

“I'm sorry tae hear that, Mia.” 

“Thank you,” she sniffed, then laughed like she couldn't believe herself. “I swear I won't actually cry.” 

“Eh, I've had much worse happen in front of me while I was working.” 

“I get that, but it's been eleven years. I thought I could hold myself together better by now.” 

He made a sympathetic sound, a hmm, just to let her know he heard her. Life could be fucking awful, he didn't have to repeat the fact. He knew his role on the phone call was to listen, and he would. It was the least he could do – he'd want the same for his sister if he had one. His brothers would rather jump off a cliff than talk about problems though, and he surely didn't want them anywhere near Mia. They'd be a void of a lot less respectful about her sexy voice. 

“By that point Cullen was already in school and away, and I took over as guardian for my brother and sister. I couldn't let them go to some aunt or worse.” 

“You take care of everybody.” He smiled to himself. Suddenly this picture of Mia was a bit more complete. 

“I try.”

“I'm sure you do a great job.” 

“Thanks, stranger,” she joked. He could hear the brightness in her voice though. Then there was a pause and he readied himself knowing she was going to ask him a question he didn’t want to answer. 

“Is my brother in trouble?” 

Well, trouble could be a lot of things. But Rylen didn't want to lie, not now that he knew more about this person and that she raised her little siblings and cared enough about her brother to be chasing down his maybe-lover for a chance to know he was fine. 

Maker, he needed to give Cullen a swift kick in the balls for this one. 

“Nae, he's nae going to jail if that's what yer thinking.” 

“Jail? Oh maker, I was thinking about Lyrium, I didn't even think about charges!” 

His pulse ticked up to unhealthy levels. His watch was going to send him an alert at this rate. 

“Hey, whoa, I just said there is nae of that.”

“Then why didn't you just say no?” 

He rubbed his forehead and leaned back in his chair, sitting at the breakfast table since Mia seemed to like morning conversation. This is where he had to draw the line. He could talk about the broad facts and not leave her completely froze out, but he couldn't tell her about her brother's issues without him knowing. He couldn't. No matter how concerned and caring Mia was, Rylen had to respect his friend. 

“Last year was the scandal in the press, right? The full story came out about the mage abuse in Kirkwall happening for years? I wasn't there yet when it took place, but came after, when they needed more support given all the bastards were obviously out of a job. Yer brother turned in his Captain, I think ye ken that…” 

“Yeah,” she replied, barely a whisper.

“Well then ye ken he didn't get in any trouble for doing it. That's when we met – yer brother is a good man and he had a hard time with it, as any of us would. Felt responsible, though it’s a tough spot tae be in, second in command.

“So when he had a chance tae come here instead he did, and asked me tae come work for him, I couldn't say nae.” 

“Wait, wait,” she panicked. “What do you mean ‘come here?’ You're not in Kirkwall?” 

Ah fuck. He sat forward with his head bowed and covered his eyes with a hand, and closed them too for good measure. It didn't help. Because now he realized his friend was not doing half as well as he thought. 

Rylen wanted to slam into work, set his phone down on Cullen's desk and ask what he was thinking, ignoring his damn sister like this. 

“I knew this was a bad idea.” 

Her voice was deathly calm, like she'd seen a catastrophic accident and had to muster up courage in the wake of it. “Where are you now?” 

“The office is in Skyhold, but we live on the Ferelden side of the mountains.” 

There was silence, like Mia was absorbing this new fact and sorting things in her head, sliding the Cullen piece across the map. The places where all her loved ones were, her responsibilities too. 

“Thank you for answering my question.” 

“In for a penny–” 

“I should… go,” she said, sounding so sad he didn't want her to leave. It surprised him how much that feeling was shaking him. They barely knew each other. 

“Alright.” 

“Thank you for calling me. I really appreciate it, truly.” 

“Yeah, any time, okay?”

The line went silent again, but she hadn't hung up. He waited her out, to see if she would say anything else, feeling like his gut was on a tightly pulled hook. 

“Okay. Bye, Rylen.” 

The call ended before he could say bye, though it wasn't like he cared about niceties right now. He looked at the clock on the microwave – it wasn't even noon – he had all his morning yet to dither around the apartment while Mia was just sitting with this knowledge he dropped on her like an idiot. 

Andraste guide him, he figured she knew about the Inquisition job. Served him right for making any assumptions about what Cullen was saying to his sister, but he had talked to her while Rylen lived in the apartment. After the first day where she called eighteen times. He had called her back, hadn't he? 

The bastard probably just messaged her. 

Rylen was worked up. He knew things were hard for his friend right now and he didn't want to make it any worse, so he swallowed the annoyance and got off his arse to do laundry or clean, or anything that would take his mind off Cullen’s sister thinking she wasn’t worth her brother's time. 

# 

 

29 Justinian at 2:22 AM

It's 2:22 make a wish 

✨✨✨

 

Yer lucky was just about tae head tae bed 

Oh

that rhymes

 

Got home about twenty minutes ago, long shift 

It does yea 

 

I’m in bed

My heads going to kill me tomorrow 

I guess it's already tomororw 

Today 

 

Hangover then, gotcha

Have fun at least? 

 

Mmmm

Mildly 

💃🏼🍻🍾🤢

 

Ye alright? 

 

Yeahhhhhhh

Tis fine 

Just thinking too much like always

And then you popped in my head and I figured why not 

You were 🟢

I saw the dots I saw them you can't hide 

 

Maker, woman I was just getting up for water 

Maybe ye need tae have some 

 

I do

I'm good at taking care of people 

Includign myself 

 

Good tae hear

 

I'm a grown woman

 

for sure... I was mistaken 

My apologies, Mia 

 

You are forgiven

good boy, Rylen

 

Heh ye kill me, I'm laughing honestly 

I better let ye go though 

 

OMM noooooe 

I'm sorry I said that and was weird

I'm drunk obviously just automatically popped out 

 

that's nae why I got tae go

I’m exhausted

 

Sorry that's so embarrassing

🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣

 

Ye dinnea have anything tae be sorry for lass 

Dinnea fash yersel

 

Sleep well 💤

You too, Mia

—

 

When he woke up after that shit shift, where demons had gotten into the train station to Skyhold and there weren’t any local templars to help, Rylen expected there to be another stream of apologies on his phone. But Mia hadn't replied again, and he hoped she was still sleeping off her hangover. 

He'd thought about her all week. It was strange to think about a person he'd never met, who he'd not actually seen. When he pictured her in his mind there wasn't an actual person to envision, but a warmth, if that made any sense. He almost didn't want to see her, because then it became too real, whatever it was he was doing. They weren't really friends, he definitely wasn't flirting, and aside from her “good boy” comment (fine, he had a wank about that before he fell asleep) she wasn't trying to hit on him either. 

This acquaintance wasn't a real thing. Nothing was happening between them he should have felt conflicted over, except he still did. Because despite not knowing her long or talking to her often, he had an idea of who Mia Rutherford was and he couldn't pretend she didn't exist. 

A realization flashed through his head as he got under the shower steam. Was her last name Rutherford? She wasn't married – right? He tried to recall the app they'd been messaging on. What exactly did it say where her name popped up? Mia Rutherford, right? 

Why did it matter though whether she was with someone or not? 

Rylen got out, got dressed and went into the kitchen for coffee and substance. He refused to look at the app to check his doubts. 

“Hey,” came a voice from the living room, Cullen’s. Apparently they both had the day off. 

“Where ye been, mate?” Rylen teased, walking through the kitchen as he spoke loudly, then stopping at the coffee pot since it was half full. Cullen wasn't a bad guy in the least. A real decent roommate. 

Rylen stepped into the living room with his cup of coffee, then swung into one of the nice leather chairs he’d brought to the apartment. Cullen barely had any furniture for guests, the heathen. 

“I’ve meant to at least show you around Haven.” Cullen’s leg was crossed over the other while he sat on the couch, papers tossed aside on one cushion. His mug was long since empty, the man got up much earlier than Rylen. Morning shift would do that to you – his brain was hardwired for adrenaline as soon as the sun hit. 

“That's alright. Nae much tae it.” 

“Still. I brought you here. Dumped you in the middle of it.” 

“I’m grown.” 

He said it without thinking, but now he was thinking. About Mia. Her assertion of being a grown woman, the “good boy,” the wank. Rylen sipped his coffee to keep anything off his face. 

Cullen shook his head, aggrieved at Rylen being a smart ass. “I do appreciate you being here.” 

“I ken, mate. Glad tae help.”  

Rylen noticed Cullen’s foot was shaking, stirring up like he was feeling anxious and didn't know how to expel it. 

“Ye talk tae yer sponsor lately? That Cassandra woman?” 

“Yes.” He replied abruptly, and Rylen thought that would be the end of it, but he waited it out, just to be sure, gave Cullen that good long stretch of uninterrupted silence to decide if he needed to say more or not. He'd done the same thing with his sister too, earlier in the week. 

“I don’t think I can do this,” he burst out at last, pinching the bridge of his nose. His hands flew up next in complaint and Rylen readied himself for it, watching calmly, sipping his coffee. “There's this co-worker, or Maker, she’s more my boss… but I can't disappoint her. I'm fairly confident I’ll fail everyone. I almost quit this week.” 

Rylen had to bite his cheek to keep from pointing out that he knew exactly who this co-worker was, since he also worked at the same place as Cullen, but he wasn't gonna give him a hard time about his feelings. He was obviously working through a romantic situation in his mind whether he acted on it or not. He decided to be entirely serious and not take the easy out. 

“The world would nae end.” 

Cullen looked at him sharply, frowning. 

“What? Some other sop would get yer job and do it half as well, but dinnae do this tae yerself.” 

“Do what?” 

“Yer taking on more weight than ye need tae. Maybe some time would help – put yerself first instead of the job. How long has it been since ye have seen any family, or friends outside of work acquaintances?” 

Rylen was not going to say anything more about family, not when he wasn't supposed to know all he did. But it would be natural to assume Cullen had one. He wasn't revealing anything, and yet he was helping Mia out a wee bit, maybe. 

“I have not been keeping up with my family,” Cullen said, chin pointed to his chest. 

“Gave ye more work tae do, sorry.” 

He wasn't actually sorry, which struck him square in the chest. Good thing he was sitting down and Cullen was looking away. He flinched. Rylen hadn't meant to press on that, but he had done so now, swiftly taking the opportunity to bring it up when his friend was already doing poorly.

“All I meant was ye got options. It's yer life and ye need tae take care. Ye can always talk tae me. And nae matter what ye wantin tae do, I'll be here tae help even when ye tell me to bugger off.” 

“Thanks,” his friend said, pulling his head up at last. “I'll hold you to that if you don't mind.” 

# 

 

By the end of his day off, which finally aligned with Cullen’s, the guilt had finally sunk in. He stood up to his neck in the guilty sea, reflecting on the day and letting the waves wash over him. 

They'd gone out, ate lunch, looked around the places Rylen had already looked around but now with some added color commentary. Then they went over to a golf place that let you hit balls over the side of a steep cliff, which would never not be satisfying. He'd ordered an ale, and Cullen got a non-alcoholic one, and they ribbed each other all afternoon about stupid shite. 

The Lyrium addiction wasn't fair. Rylen hadn't been on it for years – Starkhaven had been more progressive on that front, realizing they could do the job without it – and he wasn't surprised by the amount they'd been taking in Kirkwall with all the abuse. That Cullen had an addiction to something he'd been told to use or lose his job, well, it wasn't something Cullen had chosen to experience. And it wasn't a failing on his part that he struggled to stay off it. Rylen knew the effects of withdrawal firsthand, but he never had an addiction. The headaches, the dreams, the shakes. Terrible couldn't cover how the stuff made you feel once your body craved it. 

But he knew more about Cullen’s perspective on his family now. He'd worked it out, somehow throughout the moments of the day, silently puzzling why he wouldn't connect with his sister Mia especially. 

Cullen was afraid, and maybe ashamed, of disappointing people. Odds were, Cullen hadn't messaged his sister back because it was one more person he didn't want to fail. 

Mia hadn't messaged Rylen back that day either. He was surprised by the silence – he was expecting some kind of apology for being drunk (which he didn't need). But Mia seemed keen to defy expectations, staying silent all night, even when Rylen went to sleep. 

#

 

1 August at 9:01 AM

Ye alright? 

Yes… 

Why?

 

Just checking in on ye 

I wouldn't think the hangover’s still going on 

 

No.

I'm good. 

Fair enough 

 

August 2 at 2:19 PM

Why'd you message me yesterday?

 

Ah, ye were drunk, went to bed and I never heard from ye

 

And so?

Is this professional concern or like an allegiance to my brother? 

 

Unless yer a mage without a license practicing on other people or have a demon in the basement

Nae, ye aren't my professional concern 

Yer nae a mage right? 

 

Nope.

 

😈👿?

 

Nope on that either. 

So the other thing? 

 

Yer brother dinnae ken I'm talking tae ye 

Did ye think I'd say something tae him? 

 

I assumed so, yeah.

Especially after I got drunk and messaged you like an idiot. 

 

Why would he need tae hear about that? 

 

He does not. 

We agree then

🤜🏽

Ye gonna leave me hanging here 

Mia…

 

🤛🏻

I’ll have you know I don't just fistbump anyone.

 

Oh, I feel special I assure ye 

 

7:07 PM

Okay, you must have said something because he finally messaged me back.

We're going to talk tomorrow. 

What did you say??? 

9:41 PM

I *know* you are working but I’m so curious. 

I'm not patient. 

You know this by now. 

 

12:03 PM 

Nothing like turning on yer phone and seeing ye were missed 

Ye still up

 

Sleep? I barely sleep. 

Sleep’s for well-adjusted people.

 

Yer up before me most days aren't ye

 

🔔🔔🔔

Answer me though. 

I've cracked through and got you to tell me things before. 

 

Aye. Just asked when he last checked in with his family. 

🫶🏼🫵🏼

🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼

You're wonderful 

Spectacular 

Breathtaking 

Thank you for saying it. I know this must be weird. But I really appreciate it so much. 

 

Dinnae thank me

I've nae done anything

 

Pthhh, okay. 

Oookkaaaay.

 

12:27 AM

Home now 

Service’s terrible on the train 

Ye awake

 

Yes. Always yes.

But really, hello, stranger. 

Hey

 

Can I call you? Is that a thing?? Can we do that now?

 

Give me five

—

“You must be so tired of seeing my name on your notifications.” 

“Hardly.” 

Rylen stood in front of the fridge, deciding what to make for dinner. The door was open in one hand, the phone with Mia's voice pouring out wedged between his ear and his shoulder. 

“Can I help ye with something, Mia? Or ye calling to chat?” 

“Can it be both?” 

Rylen chuckled. “With ye, I dinnae mind either.” 

He grabbed leftover takeout and shut the fridge, plopping the Antivan pasta dish on a plate and sticking it in a microwave to reheat. His lifestyle was the peak of glamor. 

“I'm nervous.” 

He made a noise of acknowledgement, a low hmmm from the back of his throat. 

“I figured it out. You wouldn't tell me if I was right though, and it would be rude to put you in that position, I get it. But I don't know, I just never felt so nervous talking to someone I care about before and if you had any advice for me I would take it.”  

Her voice had ended on a high note, chiming in time with the microwave. Normally he avoided answering questions directly or answered them inadvertently because he was kind of a wanker. 

Everyone had a way to cope. He used mild irritants and dry humor. 

But Mia was earnest and he had not forgotten the fucking intoxicating sound of her voice. Like a siren. She asked to call and he could not say no. 

“I'm not all surprised ye figured it out.” 

“Yeah?”

“You do need tae be patient. That’s it. That’s all I'm gonna say about it.” 

“That's like asking me to breathe underwater.” 

He smiled with the fork halfway to his mouth. She was likely squirming in place, thinking about how she was going to possibly manage not jumping all over with questions. 

A heat stirred in him, low and insistent. The idea of her fighting to sit still, well fuck if that didn't turn him on. Owing her a response in the conversation, all Rylen could think about was holding her down with one hand and making her wait for release. Had anyone done that to her before? Had she tried to do it herself? 

Fuck, that was the wrong train of thought. Because suddenly his gut ached with need and he wasn't so hungry for leftovers but her instead and—

“Hello? Did I lose you?” 

“Nae,” he choked, voice strained. He cleared it. “I ah– having dinner.” 

“Mmm-hmmm,” Mia hummed, as if she knew all. Voice turning sly, which didn't help the situation, she added, “I'll let you go. Eat, sleep and be merry!” 

Rylen was left with his food and a massive problem. 

# 

 

3 August at 4:20 PM 

I think you started your shift. 

I don't know what to do. 

I think I fucked up. 

 

7:01 PM 

It can’t be as bad as all that 

 

I mean you'd know better than me by now. 

Sorry, I'm not trying to be bitter. 

I feel like a selfish idiot for not being ughhhhhhhh

 

I can't talk now but go walk or call yer wee sis

Ye said she's getting married 

Gab about dresses or flowers 

 

I resent that a little lol 

But yeah I should probably do that. 

Will you call me later? 

Promise

 

Thank you. I'm sorry for being this way all the time. 

—

 

Before Mia, Rylen didn't have anything interesting happen in his life outside of work. The Inquisition was ultimately a temporary gig anyway, a consortium working to come up with a more effective solution to the mage mental health crisis (and templars too, that system broke both directions) founded initially to ensure incidents like Kirkwall never happened again. 

He was glad to have missed all the atrocities, the routine forced tranquility that seemed an awful lot like the lobotomies of the past. Turns out just because something seemed like it came straight out of the middle ages, didn't mean it couldn't actually be happening to someone you knew now. 

He didn't interact with any of the affected mages, but getting their tranquility reversed was apparently equally horrifying. 

How much of it the general public really understood… Well, there was a good reason he was a former templar. 

Walking home from the train station, Rylen looked up at the stars and tried to keep the dimmest ones in his vision for as long as he could. Of course, they slipped away until he stopped trying to stare at them. 

The three minutes it took to reach the apartment wasn't enough. He took out his phone and pulled up the app to call Mia. He was tired, but for some reason, he wanted to keep walking and staring at stars. 

“Hi there, stranger.” 

A pleasurable shiver ran over him. He was too wiped to try and rationalize it away. 

“Hello, lass.” 

“Are you home yet?” 

“Aye, but I'm taking ye for a walk instead.” 

Mia laughed, which had quickly become the sweetest sound he ever heard. 

“Taking your own advice to heart then.” 

“Did ye do it? Call your wee sister?” 

She hummed. Maybe he liked that sound too. “How do you know the right thing to do all the time? Rosalie came over and we did wedding planning and talked all night.” 

“Seems fairly obvious.” 

“What is?”

“Ye just need someone tae talk with, Mia. Someone who’ll listen.” 

Things went very quiet until everything around him heightened into focus: the distant sounds of cars on the highway that ran across the mountain range, a live band playing music down the street at a tavern, crickets in the park. He smiled at the crickets. 

“Oh.” Her voice was very small. A flare of something sharp went through him, like a warning sign. Turn back now, it said. 

Rylen blew past the sign and read it as something else. 

“Mia…” 

She was crying, muffled by a hand or maybe the phone was held away. He stopped walking, in the middle of the sidewalk where no one else was anyway because it had crept past midnight in a relatively sleepy town. People had cried in front of him before for many different reasons, but never because of something he said. Rylen wasn’t sure he could make that claim any longer. 

“I'm sorry,” she gasped. The crying went distant again. 

Her apologizing through tears gutted him. “Crying’s allowed last I checked,” he said, strained. His heart was twisting uncomfortably, he had to keep rubbing there to reassure himself he wasn't dying. “It was me who made ye feel bad – I'm the one who's sorry for making ye cry.”

He wished he was with her, could offer a hug, rub her back, anything to help. As it was, however far away (he didn't even know where she lived), Rylen couldn't do anything but follow his own advice. He looked up at the stars again and focused on the brightest ones. 

“Sweetheart,” he tried after no time at all, unable to wait, wanting to pull her back to him. 

There was an audible gasp, sharp and laden with meaning. After a tense pause, or at least a moment where his body became tense, she sniffled, “I’m here.”

“It's good tae hear yer voice again.” 

“I’m—” 

She was about to apologize, but he couldn't stomach another. “Dinnae do it– save it for a time where ye actually do something tae apologize for.” 

“It’s something I do without thinking. Just like the tears. I am embarrassed for crying at you like this.” 

“Why? I'm nae judging.” 

A whisper of a sigh bounced between his ears and settled in the back of his skull. Something about this woman's voice stirred feelings he’d not felt in a long while. Rylen was tending his kindling all wrong; Mia came in and fanned the flames with an expelled breath. 

“I haven't told ye this, but the sound of yer voice is nigh on the best highs I've ever felt.” 

He could hear her smile in the response – “flatterer.” 

“Aye, I will. Ye make the hairs on my neck stand up.” She laughed then, which he infinitely preferred to anything else in the world. “Yer laugh – that brìgh mhòr ann. I want tae make ye laugh all night, nae cry.” 

“How do you think I feel when you’re talking to me like you do? I need a cold shower after just texting you, but when you whip out another language? I might actually be dead.” He chuckled, pleased he had that effect on her too. More than pleased. “What did you say?”

“Look, I’m nae trying tae be responsible for yer death.”

“Subtle non-answer.” 

“Do ye want tae talk about earlier?” 

“Yes? No? Can it be both? I don't want you to think I'm this … fragile bird that needs everything softened so it's palatable. I can handle hard things.” 

He rubbed his rib cage and kept walking, heading nowhere. 

“Ye can, I'm nae doubting that. Tell ye what. I'll let ye ask me anything ye want to know and I'll give a straight answer.” 

# 

 

More than a month had passed since the night Rylen and Mia talked into the hours of dawn. He’d walked until the stars had faded entirely and the sky had gone gauzy soft with the far reaches of the sun’s light. She shared the extent of her conversation with her brother, Rylen reassured her it was all well (she wasn’t expected perfection, it was okay to feel upset, her feelings mattered too), and then they stopped talking about the third person between them and focused on each other. 

More often than not, Rylen spent his evenings talking to Mia on the phone. Not always outside, but sometimes, gathering up the fresh mountain air in his lungs until he felt as light as he could ever remember. 

Mia was deeply sensitive, but also capable of being funny and unserious with him. Yet there were moments of intensity that he patiently walked her through, listening, like he’d said she needed. One day she broke her mum’s watch while gardening, and that became a heart-to-heart he hadn't been prepared for, finding himself near tears while she told stories about her parents. 

While he was outwardly reserved she was instantly open, and the blending of their personalities seemed to just work, without much effort at all. 

There was still her brother between them. Rylen was content to let it sit. For now. They were just talking, and neither had made any plans for anything beyond that connection. He didn't want to go down the path of announcing something that might not stick, especially when Cullen had turned the corner. Mia broke the news about his bosses getting together, which made him grin like an idiot on multiple levels. One, that Mia had heard it first, which meant the siblings were communicating again, and two, that Cullen had made a move (or she had, which seemed more likely). 

One night in late Kingsway, Mia brought up the wedding, which was quickly approaching. 

“Rosalie is lucky I love her so much, because a Satinalia wedding is not an original concept. Everything is twice as expensive as it should be.” 

This time, Rylen was reclined in bed, down to his boxers with his ankles crossed. He had heard about this wedding multiple times before, but then never money, and he realized he had no idea what Mia actually did all day not sleeping. He asked, very by and by, but she laughed at his attempt to be indirect. 

“Marketing, at a startup,” she replied. “I work from home. I actually lead a team of about 20 people – it pays very well. If that's what you're wondering about, nosy.”  

“I’m nae trying tae steal yer income,” he defended, raising his hands as if she could see them. The phone was wedged next to his ear. 

“You could be my house husband,” she joked. 

The air snapped taut between them, miles and miles apart (he knew she lived in Ferelden now, nearly 400 miles away outside Denerim). There was a sort of magic at play, that intangible power of attraction between two people that could not be explained by the Fade. His throat went dry as he tried to come back from a joke gone slightly away from her, too close to the thing neither of them wanted to discuss. 

He decided to be the grown one and discuss it. 

“What are we doing here, Mia?” 

“I’m supposed to ask the questions and you ignore them.” 

“Not right now.” 

“Hm, well I prefer harmless text banter to this.” 

Rylen hung up the call. She'd be fuming for a second, until she laughed at him for being an idiot. He could live with that. 

 

26 Kingsway at 1:14 AM 

What are we doing here, Mia? 

 

I should leave you on read. 

Rude ass. 

 

That's not an answer lass

 

What do YOU think we’re doing?

 

Hmm 

I think we're getting close tae each other 

And have tae decide if we want tae try a go at it for honest 

 

Honestly? 

 

Of course

 

I really like you.

I can't believe this happened like this. We've never even seen each other. 

 

Yer worried I'm nae a looker 

 

Are you KIDDING me? Lol the internet exists. 

Wait, have you really not looked me up?

Rylen whatever-your-middle-name-is McClachen, look at my profile this instant 

 

Why

I can tell by your voice and your personality that yer bonnie – I don't need to see ye to know how I feel about ye

 

—

 

He got a call again, from Mia of course, but it was a video chat, and his heart did a flip clench, that drove him sitting up, right in the middle of his bed. 

He answered it, with his camera off first, just because he could. 

As the video call connected, he had a moment to look at her before she told him to stop playing around. Rylen nearly choked. There was hair – everywhere – long, buttery blonde curls pulled away from her face with a band of some kind, bright blue eyes with dark lashes and brows, a perfect mouth shaped with a cupid’s bow.  

“Ah, there ye are,” he said, heart stuck in his throat.

A smile flitted across her full lips, a flush spreading across her cheeks. That was one thing listening didn’t tell him – he had no idea she was a blusher. 

“Maker’s breath, Mia—”

“You're not a coward, so face me,” she teased, a playful spark in her bright eyes, despite the lateness of the night. 

Rylen pressed the camera button on his phone screen, then flipped it to front facing mode before realizing it opened on selfie view. He’d never done this before, obviously. 

“Do I make you nervous?” she laughed, and he about near lost hold of himself watching the corner of her eyes crinkle in delight. 

“Yea, of course ye do. Look at yea, Mia – fuck me, yer gorgeous.”

By now he’d gotten the camera figured out and she tilted her head just so when he popped up on her screen. The smile on her face kept expanding and his heart did too – the knowledge that she liked what she saw just as much as he did. 

“I always wanted to ask, why the tattoos?”

“Ach,” he groaned, touching the side of his nose. “I was a bit of an eejit when I was younger. One of five brothers – lost a dare. But this was the mildest thing I could get away with.”

“Well,” she said, grinning, “it suits you.”

“I'm glad ye think so.”

“I do.”

“Ye said that, lass.”

Her eyes fluttered closed and her face got all pink before she covered it with the hand not holding the phone. The view got all jostled for a moment. He wasn’t an idiot still – he knew what that meant. Rylen also wasn’t beneath a bit of teasing. 

“Ye sure ye dinnae want tae go back tae texting? Cannae hide that blush when yer on the phone now can ye?”

She looked up, cheeks still marked by the most becoming color, and pierced right through his defenses. 

“Maybe I wanted you to finally realize how you make me feel.”

#

 

29 Kingsway at 7:23 AM

Are you awake yet, sleepy?

 

Ye are insane with yer hours

Now I am aye

What is it lass

 

That’s what I need help with. 

Will you … 

Call me?

—

He just did a voice call – it was too early to be on display. Another long night had passed where they chatted each other with their cameras on, which took adjusting – he found himself staring into her bottomless blue eyes then when he forced himself to look away, he grew entirely distracted by her perfect mouth. Rylen kept apologizing for missing fully what she was saying, and Mia kept smiling knowingly and asking if she had to turn her camera back off. 

“Hello, stranger,” she answered, breathy and high-pitched. He instantly knew what was about to occur and felt a jolt of energy slither through the center of his body down to his groin. 

“I want you to talk to me,” she said, lowly, reverberating right into his skull, sending a shiver around his neck, across his shoulders. “I know we haven’t done this before but—”

“Nae time like the present,” he rushed, laughing at his eagerness. She laughed too, which made his chest tighten. Maker, he loved the sound of her so carefree. “Are ye laying in bed?” 

“Just out of the shower, actually. I'm still wet.” 

She delivered it straight. His heart skipped a beat. The ways she wrapped herself around him without even knowing– 

“Ach, fuck, sweetheart.” 

“Mmm that works,” she teased. 

“Ye have tae give me something,” he said low, ears perked to take in every reaction on the other side of the call. “Something tae work with. What do ye like?”

“You.” 

He breathed through his nose. This was sweet torture, not knowing what was happening there – what the woman was doing with her hands, her fingers, whether they’d already gone deep into wet heat. “Are ye touching yerself then?” 

“Mhmm.” 

“I have nae the faintest – I cannae even remember the last time I did this,” he laughed, palming his face. 

“It doesn’t even matter what you say, just that you’re listening.”

Oh, fuck all. That was — right. He cleared his throat, heavy with wanting her, and spoke softly so she’d have to strain a bit, which came clear in his mind, her arching to reach herself, to hold the phone up to listen. Maybe she’d have to wedge it against her ear too, needing both hands. 

“Alright, but dinnae judge a man without practice, all’s I’m saying.”

“We’ll get it perfect.”

He was going to bite through his lip at this point if she didn’t stop with these alluring promises. “Mia, sweetheart, I want tae be there with ye now. But since I’m nae – are ye going to be a good lass and do what I tell ye tae?”

A feminine whimper struck him straight in the chest. “Yes, I want to be good for you. Tell me—”

Later if asked, Rylen wouldn’t have the faintest idea about what he said most of the time. Descriptions, actions, begging – he probably did it all. What left an indelible print was Mia. Throaty voice turning soft at times, the sharp intakes of breath, the low whine that rattled his senses until he forgot everything around him. It all came down to her, the world spinning just to give her the sun, the moon, the stars. 

But there was one moment he wouldn’t forget, asking her to show him, greedy and desperate for a view. And bless her, Mia complied, turning on her camera and sitting up against the headboard, legs spread for him. It was not long after they both came, gasping each other’s names at the same moment, and he was unable to watch any longer, dropping the phone on the bed as pleasure gripped him hard. 

When he picked it up, the video was gone, but she was still there, catching her breath, thinking on the other side. 

“Mia,” he breathed out, then inhaled deeply to get himself right. How was he supposed to go into work and be around other people when the image of her fingers diving into her bonnie cunt flashed through his mind on repeat?

“I’m here.” 

“Ye alright?”

“That was… a lot.” She laughed, not the easy way, but a bit pitched, like she was having a hard time believing in what she’d done. 

That wouldn’t do at all.

“Aye, yer telling me. I have a wee loch forming in my belly button right now. Dinnae ken how I’m going tae make it tae the bathroom without a dam holding it in place.” 

“Oh. My. Maker!” she shrieked in laughter, peels of it ringing bright until he couldn’t help but join in too, the puddle of come that was truly across his belly button shaking with the force of it. “You are—” she trailed off, then giggled into a sweet satisfied sigh. “Thank you, Rylen.”

“Nae thanks to ye, Mia. Now I have tae get up and face a bunch of wankers while I’m thinking of ye crying out my name like tha'.”

“Poor boy. Serves you right for asking to watch. Somehow I think you’ll manage.”

II.

 

Mia had almost everything in order for her sister’s wedding. The flowers, the cake, the live band (DJs were for people with no taste), everything organized down to the last moment, save for one. 

It was a big one. 

Rosalie had been such a sweet kid, and now she was a lovely woman who bloomed with happiness. Twenty and getting married. At twenty, Mia had been taking care of her siblings for a year already. It was with no small amount of pride that Mia reflected her baby sister could find love and take it with both hands because she’d done well to give her that kind of comfortable life. Still, Mia wondered what her life could have been like had her parents not died. 

It used to be whenever she felt that soul-crushing weight, she would go out and find a man to have discreet, yet still largely uninhibited sex. None of those men ever lasted beyond the initial few times, dropping like flies if she talked about her life, her siblings, her responsibilities. Even if she wanted to find someone to seriously love, there was hardly any time to vet for the kind of men who could be a step-father to nearly grown siblings. 

She was never bitter – never (or at least, she never told anyone if she was), but Mia had, at her lowest moments, felt like her plans died with her parents. 

Would she have gone into corporate marketing in that other life where her parents lived? Fuck no. It carried its own degree of soul-crushing, but it paid well, was stable enough, and she was smart enough to rise quickly. Money wasn’t everything, but it was a requirement to raise a family of three in the capital city. And Cullen had been no help at first, lost in his own career and everything that happened after. 

Mia could hardly think about what he’d told her without tearing up. They were true siblings in a way that Branson and Rosalie would never quite be. Mia didn’t have to raise Cullen; she grew with him, banded with him, shoved his face into the purple carpet of their shared bedroom, and accidentally walked in once when he was jerking off. So when he pulled away, quite dramatically, it felt like another part of her died too; a piece she wasn’t willing to give. 

She wouldn’t lose him again. Mia was tenacious. Even if required showing up in Haven and working from his apartment, she would not let her brother keep himself locked up in regret. 

But, for all her tenaciousness, she also couldn’t force him to do anything. Frustrating, that. Rosalie had asked, rather tentatively, which crushed Mia’s heart, if Cullen would walk her down the aisle. He hadn’t said no, but he hadn’t agreed either. 

Oddly though, and not for the straightforward reason of their friendship, Mia had Cullen to thank for bringing her and Rylen together. If he’d responded right away about the wedding, about the request to walk Rosalie down the aisle, then she wouldn’t have called him a desperate amount of times looking for a sign of life. 

And if he hadn’t left his phone at home.

There was no use in going over all the little things that had to happen, dominoes lining up, to bring the best person she’d ever not-actually met into her life. It had happened just as it did, and every day Mia felt she had to thank the universe for aligning things finally, finally , in her direction. 

#

17 Harvestmere at 2:40 PM 

What would ye say if I came tae visit?

 

I would say, get your sexy arse down here. 

Please.
😗

I can’t promise anything

But I don’t know how much longer I can make it without burying my head between yer thighs

 

Rylen, holy fuck. 😳

What if …

I came up there 

 

Really now 

Yer ready for that 

Tae have that conversation?

 

Right. 

Maybe not, then. I want to hear the answer about the wedding first. 

Is that awful of me?

I shouldn’t be pressuring him to do anything, just showing up would be great. 

You deleted a message. 

 

Dinnae do that 

Ye can say anything tae me Mia 

 

—

He called her after midnight, in that hour of night that seemed to only exist for them. She knew he sometimes walked through Haven while talking to her. And Rylen would never say, but it was because he needed a place of his own. The tendency to overextend herself was right there, but Mia would not this time. If her brother needed Rylen’s support (even when they barely saw one another) then he should have it. 

It added up though. All the little negative thoughts piling in the back of her mind like the sweaters that slipped off their hangers in the back of her closet. 

“Hello, stranger,” she said, not meaning to sound off, but failing to hide a thing. 

“Worried yerself sick about it today, did ye?”

“Completely. I sat in the garden for hours. I was really mean deadheading the late blooms, probably snipped off more than necessary. They won’t come back at this rate.”

He laughed into his chest, which she couldn’t see, but knew now by the kind of laugh it was, the shape of the conversation. Information that Mia did not need to retain in her brain to live, but appreciated having all the same. 

“The one time I might be glad tae keep my heads from yer reach.” She snorted, rolling her eyes at her ceiling. “A snort! It’s been so long since I was acquainted with yer bemused noises.”

“Maker, Rylen! You just can’t let me be annoyed can you?”

“Nae if I can do anything tae help it, nae.”

A lightning bolt reflex to say, “I love you,” in response to that profound statement struck Mia so intensely she started saying the words before her senses caught up. She pivoted swiftly, but had no idea if she was at all convincing. 

“I love… how you can say those things so easily.”

Lame, lame, lame, lame, lame. She screamed inside her own head.

“It’s nae from practice. If ye think I’m rehearsing in the train on the way home, I tell ye, I’m thinking about food. And your bonnie cunt, if we’re being honest with each other.”

“Rylen!”

“What? It is verra bonnie, and we established I don’t get tae see it near enough as I’d like.”

#

A week later, Mia drove down into Denerim, fighting for decent parking, to see Rosalie at her final wedding dress fitting. The wedding was the following weekend, Satinalia falling on the first of Firstfall, which meant celebrations would be all the more irreverent and ridiculous for the rarity. 

At the small boutique shop that charge absorbent rates, but had pulled Rosalie in with immaculate beadwork, Rosalie twirled in her gown, inlaid with lace and precious little pearls for buttons up the back. She looked absolutely beautiful, a princess standing up on her pedestal. As she shifted and looked at herself from all angles, Mia could remember Rosalie’s first school dance. She’d had the same excited expression, the same dreamy eyes picturing whichever person would sweep her off her feet. 

Maker, Mia’s life had not been perfect. But this, this was everything she had dreamed of giving to her sister. All the sacrifices were worth it to get here. 

“Are you crying?” 

“Nope, not me,” Mia said, tucking away her phone. She had enough pictures of the dressmaker at Rosalie’s feet. 

“Now I’m crying,” Rosalie added, wiping her eyes, mascara tracking down her face. “Come up here and give me a hug because I can’t move!” 

She leapt up at lightspeed, gaining a glare from the nearly-trampled dressmaker. “Sorry” she mouthed, before clasping her sister in an awkward, but still warm, side hug. They clutched each other tightly, giggling through shared tears, until Mia pulled back. She stood close enough to reach out again if she wanted. She crossed her arms, purse slung over a shoulder, and watched Rosalie observe herself in the mirror. 

“What do you think?”

“I think your fiance is a very lucky lady.”

Rosalie smiled to herself, blushing. Cursed by the Rutherford flush. “I am too.”

#

 

The appointment with Rosalie had passed quickly. There was little to be done when the bride was a fit twenty with a gym addiction. Mia tried on her own dress too, which stood out from the other bridesmaids given her status as mother figure-slash-sister. Instead of a deep amber, it was luscious red. When it was Mia’s turn to get up and examine herself in front of the trio of mirrors, she couldn’t help comparing her body to her sister’s. 

It was unfair, truly, to think about the differences between a twenty-year-old woman and a woman of thirty-one. Her breasts, for one, looked incredible, and she had her little sister to thank for the square cut of the neckline. But Mia stared at her hips until she felt she could burn holes in the fabric with her eyes. 

This incredible thing with Rylen? He’d never seen her in person, only on a small screen and blinded by the sight of her pussy. Which, all things considered of course, was a libido booster. She wanted him at the wedding, but with a week to go and never having mentioned this whim to him, she doubted it was possible. But Mia knew she wasn’t saying it out loud for a reason, and when her mind crept to terrible impossibilities where he saw her, in the flesh, and didn’t want her… 

She choked on her own spit, coughing up a storm when released from the capable hands of the dressmaker. Why was she doing this to herself, even picturing a scenario that could never happen? First, because she hadn’t invited him so he couldn’t be there to dismiss her, and second, because he was not that kind of person. 

Maker’s breath, she was deep in love with a man she had never physically met, who was the best friend of her brother that just happened to be struggling with addiction and PTSD. All the secrets were getting to her, but she couldn’t break this week of all weeks. 

“Are you okay?” Rosalie asked, hand coming to Mia’s back. 

“In what sense of the word?”

“Mia—”

“I’m fine! Of course. You know me,” she assured, smoothing Rosalie’s hair. It was straightened, which always made Mia a little extra mopey. She loved when Rosalie let her strawberry blonde curls go wild like she used to as a girl, hair bobbing behind her as she ran after Branson. It seemed though, her wee sister (everything he said stayed stuck in her head with superglue) was happiest when she appeared all grown up. 

“A week to go, babe. Let’s get you married.”

# 

27 Harvestmere at 12:01 PM

Can you … you know.

 

I ken a lot Mia 

But I need ye tae use yer words

 

Can I call you for a quickie?

 

I assume so, yer phone seems tae be working

—

“Rylen!” She yelled at him in exasperation as a greeting. He was so himself all the damn time and she loved him so much for it. “Never change, okay?”

“Ye liked that one did ye?”

“Loooved it,” she said with the most sarcasm she could muster.

“How can I be of service tae ye this afternoon, Mia?”

She flushed, then switched on the camera, waiting for him to do the same. He was in the living room, which meant her brother was absolutely not at home. Mia liked seeing Rylen in other rooms than the bedroom, because she wasn’t just a horny woman looking for someone to get her off. She felt suddenly compelled to tell him that. Not just because she was too scared to say the other words. 

The sun from the window shone right on the side of his face, the lighting perfectly lovely and warm. He looked like a bronzed statue of a classic male figure, sitting there patiently waiting for her to start talking at him. He must have thought she was a crazy person still, all these months later. 

“I want you to know that you mean a lot to me.” She did the thing when she was fighting for her life to hold back tears, flattening her mouth and nodding her head in a really unattractive way (she could see herself in the corner of the screen and it was not a cute look). 

“This seems like one of those moments in the movies where there's a “but” coming.”

“What?” Mia stopped pulling her face and glared at him. 

“Are ye breaking things off with me?” 

“Why would I call you for a quickie and then dump you first?” She felt her cheeks go wan, her hands felt cold. 

“Stranger things have been said tae me before I took my pants off.” 

Sick to her stomach, Mia did not care for the joke. “Are you – why would you think –” She took a breath, and pinched the bridge of her nose. “I was trying to tell you I love you!” 

When she looked up, he was stock still, face unreadable. Uncanny, how he could be so calm—

“Yer quite serious? 

Mia wanted to strangle him. 

“Well I was.” 

“Sweetheart,” he said, straining a little. Mia no longer wanted to strangle him, maybe lightly choke, if he was into that.

“I dinnae ken –” 

“I thought you knew all.”

He frowned at her. “I said 'a lot' –” 

“Okay, well,” she reasoned, trying to recover. No longer in the mood, no longer wanting to be on the phone, she panicked. Mia couldn't take the silence, the space where he was doing anything but saying it back, daring to take up precious moments breathing instead of saying the words “I love you, too.”

“I gotta go,” she blurted out, then ended the call. 

Predictably, he called her right back. Mia stood up from her bed and backed away from the call, irrationally. She couldn't – what if he was always going to end things? What if he was just planning to see how far this would go before he blocked her? Mia didn't even have his actual phone number. She had never been to his house. She had never even kissed him! You couldn't possibly love someone if you hadn't even kissed them. 

She walked away from the ringing phone. If she just kept ignoring it, then he couldn't end it. Not without driving to see her (not like he had her address). Mia went into the front entryway and laced up her tennis shoes, then pulled her hair up into a high ponytail with the hair tie that lived perpetually around her wrist. She'd already taken the week off work to help support with the wedding and had no obligations. 

She didn't need her phone. Mia grabbed her jacket for the cold front that had hit earlier in the week and went for a walk. 

# 

By the time she arrived home, the phone had stopped its ringing. Rylen wasn't like Mia. He wouldn't just keep calling over and over. 

He'd probably left her a voice memo and sent exactly three messages with no punctuation. 

She couldn't look. Not to see if Rosalie had needed anything, if Branson had finally straightened out his issue with his professor, if Cullen was planning to walk his sister down the aisle.

Fuck. The more she thought about that last one… The wedding was days away now. She needed to figure out what he wanted to do. 

Nothing better than to ignore one crisis for another. Mia flipped her phone off with a petulant middle finger, giving her bed a wide berth, and dug her work cell phone from the purse abandoned in her comfy chair. Cullen's number hadn’t changed since he first got one and she had it memorized (hers had never changed either, which burned since he never called it).

She wasn't sure if he'd be home by now, but that had never stopped her from trying before. Mia dialed and waited, about to hang up when he picked up at the last second. 

“Mia you just–” 

“Are you walking Rosalie down the aisle or not?” 

No hello, no preamble, just right to the point. Enough dicking around, Mia was distraught and looking to solve one fucking thing at a time. 

“I meant to call you.” 

“When? Today?” 

“Yes, actually. Look, I'm not going to rehash everything we talked about before. But for all those reasons, and for many more good ones, I think you should be the one to walk her down the aisle, not me.” 

“That’s–” 

He interrupted, which was fine because she didn't have a clear runway for her thoughts. 

“I'm sorry it took so long to tell you, but I talked to Rosie first. I didn't want her to think I didn't love her, if that’s why I was saying no. I’ve never been a parent to her. You have. You raised them when I couldn't get my own life together.” 

“You didn't–” 

He railroaded her again. When he had something to say, Cullen went for it. Not that she knew what that was like at all.

 “I haven't ever thanked you, Mia.” He got a little choked up, she could tell because it got absolutely silent, which meant the phone was probably thrust down while he pinched his stupid nose (and maybe she did that sometimes too). When he came back, his voice wasn't as steady as it had been. 

“I have so many regrets. I missed out on everything – but you kept them from– hating me. I– uh, I don't know how you did that, and I know I didn’t deserve that kindness, but I want to be there now. You're the reason I can. 

“I just wanted to say all that and tell you I love you, sis. Thank you for never giving up on me, our family. You're an incredible person and I hope you know just how much you mean to us.” He shot a breath through his nose, like a small chuckle. “Including me, of course.” 

“Oh. That's… that's really so sweet, Cullen, I–” 

All Mia could do was cry at the unexpected words she never thought she'd hear from her brother. Of course her heart twisted a little, getting a confession out of the last place she expected after what happened with Rylen. With Cullen there sniffling alongside her though, Mia didn't have a chance to feel anything but hopeful for her future. She had a family she had fought for with everything in her and it had worked out in the end. If she dropped over dead tomorrow, she could be proud of how her life had turned out. 

#

 

Growing up in a busy household, being an early riser felt like a fortunate boon.  It meant Mia got to spend time with her mom before anyone else; extra special time that no one could claim but them. Her mom probably had little secret moments with all her children, but Mia cherished her early morning memories. Together they'd have “first breakfast” with tea – Ferelden Breakfast for her mom and herbal for her until she was old enough for caffeine, and sometimes if they had the energy or built-up tension, they’d tromp out in the garden in the back and dig up vegetables for dinner or deadhead flowers. 

So now when Mia couldn't sleep and found herself awake before the sun, it still felt like a connection to her mom, a decade gone. After the day of mixed love confessions, she got up, ate a little breakfast, stared remorsefully at the deadheaded flowers in her mother's garden (that didn’t really deserve ripping into), then finally collapsed into bed and decided whether or not to look at her phone to see what Rylen had said. 

She had been ridiculous. Mia could see it now, even after a sub-par night of rest, her brain had righted itself and showed her the shape of what she'd done. Why, it was with great irony she was no better than Cullen had been starting this whole thing – acting as if ignoring a phone call would change anything about a situation. And besides, she was overreacting too, knowing in her heart that the man she'd shut out would never go so far as string her along. Even without a kiss, she understood that about Rylen. 

It was in the way he picked up the phone from the very start, the way he brought her down to reality with that dry sarcastic humor and sensible advice, and when she asked for more of him before, he’d always given it. 

Heart in a much better place, Mia went for her phone in the nightstand. She drew open the drawer and went to flip it over to peer at the notifications. Her doorbell rang at the same time, 5:03 a.m. to be precise, and a jolt of nervousness caused her to drop the device back in its timeout box. 

Mia crept to the door like the haunted mistress of a decrepit house, dragging her feet and peering every which way into the shadowy corners. No one rang her door this early. And her siblings wouldn't bother to ring, but would unlock it using their spare keys. 

The bell rang again and she jumped out of her skin, close enough to the frosted glass panes on either side of the door to see a large shape outside. Well of course, there was a shape, how else would the bell ring? 

In a state of confusion, Mia looked down to double check sure she wasn't in her nightgown (she was not). Taking a breath, she squared her shoulders and unlocked the door, cracking it open a tiny sliver to look through.

“Hello, stranger,” a preciously familiar voice said, mimicking her refrain. 

Mia wrenched open the door until there was nothing between her and Rylen but air, her heart leaping into her throat. Thoughts running wild, heart beating with glee, she asked, “How can you be at my house?” 

Not the most eloquent question to start with, but logistically he should have been miles away, none the wiser to her front yard and front stoop. 

“I drove,” he said, not at all sarcastic, but serious, face open and searching, hoping. “If ye let me in, I'll explain tae ye how cars work.”

There he was. 

Mia shook her head and backed up, allowing Rylen into her house, her family's house, the house that had become hers when her parents died on their way back to it. 

“You're not here to break up with me, right?” she asked, recalling her frantic thoughts from the day prior. 

“Nae sweetheart,” he replied, accent even more intoxicating in person. And the size of him, maker , she knew he was tall (and so was she), but his shoulders were wide and his frame took up the entire space of the door as he walked in and skirted politely past her. 

Mia shut the door and latched it again, leaning against it for safety. She felt unmoored, this giant Starkhavener in her front entry room. There was a pile up of wedding things on a bench, and her coats were tossed over a few hooks, her shoes discarded on the floor from her garden inspection. She wasn't making a great first impression on the house she kept. 

He was waiting her out though, simply watching her patiently. Mia found the courage to speak, pressing off the door and stepping up to him. 

“What are you doing here?” 

He smirked, pleased to be asked. The warmth of his presence nearly took her knees out. She was so in love. 

“I'm here tae tell ye I love ye, which I do, verra much, Mia, and then kiss ye if ye let me.” 

“Is that all?” she heard herself say. His smirk turned into an honest grin and he stepped closer like he’d finally had permission to touch her, pulling her the rest of the way, very slowly, and gently, with his large hands on her hips. The faint pressure there sent a flurry of nerves in her stomach. 

“Well I was hoping tae make love tae ye, but that seemed rather presumptuous. Dinnae ye think?” 

Her mouth went dry. “No,” she squeaked out past her sandpaper tongue. “You can make love to me if you want.” 

Bright eyes closing for a moment, Rylen steeled himself to that fact, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed arousal back. When he opened his eyes, they were wet with tears, the light blue like a placid lake reflecting an overcast day.   

His fingers clenched her hips now, dragging her even closer. “I love ye verra much, Mia.” Rylen drew his head down slightly to demonstrate without words. A maddeningly short distance to go to her mouth, he paused. “I’m going tae kiss ye now, sweetheart.” 

Mia pressed up, meeting his lips in a hurry, all trepidation gone. Her expectations for this experience were high, but the reality blew over them entirely. He was warmer than she expected, larger too, taller and broader. The drag of his stubble on her cheek as they positioned themselves sent a shiver over her face and up into her hairline. Mia reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer still, his arms coming around her back to embrace her fully. 

The kiss felt like a kept promise, a rightness flowing through her entire body and soul knowing that what they had wasn't just good, it was real. She hadn't made up their love just because she was lonely and needed someone to listen to her. She had gone and found him, and he balanced her and she kept him on his toes, and together they had discovered something infinitely sweeter than she could have imagined possible. 

Rylen deepened the kiss, sneaking a tongue between her lips and she jumped a little uncoolly in his grasp. “Aye, I ken,” he muttered before shifting up a hand to cradle her face. “Ye make me nervous tae.” 

“You? Nervous?” She pulled back, eyeing him skeptically. “Right now? I don't believe it.” 

His hand swept down her face, capturing a curly lock of hair and pulling it out as far as it would stretch. It bounced back as he let go, and he smiled at the spot it landed.

“The last time I was this nervous I was giving a speech at my school graduation. I was already sick with the flu and dinnae think I could speak without heavin’ my guts all over the podium.”

“Awe, you were the valedictorian,” she crooned, picturing a younger Rylen suffering through all that. The poor thing. 

“Salut,” he said, and she followed with an immediate little "hello,” which made his eyes flare with humor before finishing his thought. “But who's counting second place?”

Mia reached up and kissed the side of his mouth. “I do.” She couldn't help but laugh as he adjusted so her lips fell squarely on his mouth. 

“I'm nae done with ye, lass.” 

#

 

Her bedroom was much cleaner than the hallway, her clothes all put away in the closet, her bed neatly made. Mia led Rylen in her room by a hand, which felt nigh scandalous given she never had been able to touch him before. But she had to get over the jitters quickly if she wanted the next part to go well. 

Mia was not a nervous lover, but she was a little startled now. 

“We don't have tae—”

“Sush, you,” she placed her fingers over his mouth. He grabbed her hand and kissed them, gazing at her with hot blood in his veins and promises in his eyes. “I don't want to wait any longer,” she said, pulling her hand away to remove her sweater. She yanked it over her head, then draped it on the edge of the bed before starting on her leggings, sitting down to take them off. “You can get undressed too,” she teased, “unless you want me to help.”

“Would ye? My mind stopped working as soon as I realized ye were nae wearing anything under that sweater.” 

“Oh?” She slipped off the leggings and snapped the band of her underwear playfully. “Should I be worried about your health? What's going to happen when you see my bonnie cunt?” 

Rylen sputtered, covering his face, then shook off the shock of her words, laughing. “I like ye this way, lass.” 

“Naked?” 

“Happy.” 

Mia tilted her head and wrinkled her brow, tears threatening to push through. She realized she could say what she wanted whenever she wanted now. “I love you,” she said softly, feeling so happy she could burst. 

Rylen came down on his knees before her, hands pressing against her hips, pushing her back. “Look at my arms,” he said, and Mia looked down. Goosebumps had broken across his forearms, the hair there standing on end. “Ye always do that tae me, even from the start… tha do ghuth na òran bhrèagha.”

“Tell me what that means.” 

“Yer voice is a beautiful song. I can't get it out of my head, sweetheart. Ye call tae me, yer always whispering sweet nothings in my ear, I cannae eat or sleep or do anything without thinking of yer beautiful voice – teasing me, trusting me with yer thoughts and dreams. I dinnae deserve ye, Mia. No one could.” 

“That's not true,” she argued, pressing her hands down his chest. She kept reaching down, unil she grabbed the edge of his knit sweater and slid her hands under it, exploring the expanse of his skin, the hair on his stomach and chest. “We deserve each other.”

His eyes filled with bare affection, love tangible in the space between them, in their hearts. She could feel it, thumping against her breast, warming her entire body. 

“Aye, then. I like that much better.” 

Up he pressed, taking her lips again, softly and sweetly, a union of well-matched feelings. Mia helped to pull off his knit, then scooted back to her pillows while popping the button on his jeans, hands sinking in to cup his backside before he could yank them down. 

He broke their kiss to pull off his boots, Mia’s greedy hands hurrying him all the way, until he shook his head and ditched the last one, then the jeans. He laid down over her, huge body caging her in, holding her together. One hand in her hair the other on a hip. They kissed and rolled around for a long while, enjoying the time to work up to a release. At one point Mia landed on top, straddling his hips as she kissed his neck, and Rylen groaned so deeply she thought she could wrench out an orgasm from the sound alone. 

“You are so handsome,” she crooned, tongue along his collarbone. “I'm a very lucky girl.”

“I'm glad ye think so,” he said, in that way of his, angling his hips to bump against her. “And ye ken yer the most beautiful woman I've ever set eyes on.” 

She smiled to herself, peppering kisses down his chest in a straight line. “Mmm, tell me more about how bonnie I am.” 

“Nae, ye dinnae be thinking of getting away with what yer trying there, lass. Not till I get tae eat yer cunt first.” Mia looked up at an entirely serious Starkhavener – face full of admonishment. “Get on the bed,” he said, leaning up to wrench her over him.

“Make me.” 

“Aye, I will,” he promised, delivering swiftly, snatching her waist and throwing her down beneath him again into the soft cradle of her mattress. “Yer not getting a lick of that until ye come on my face, ye hear?” 

“Oh, yes, sir.” His ears turned red, which Mia noted out loud with sheer delight. 

“I'm getting down on my knees, I cannae hear ye,” he lied, trying to pass off how much he enjoyed her calling him that. Her lilac thong, pretty enough for visitors thank goodness, was still between them, but not for long. Thick hands smoothed up her legs, fingers hooking the fabric. He slid them off nice and slow, watching with rapt fascination, swallowing hard. “Ah, and hello tae ye tae,” he directed at her pussy, and she laughed silently, belly shaking as he grinned and winked. 

He ate her out like a man without need for air. Mia watched, up on her elbows, gazing at his head bowed between her legs for as long as she could. At times she had to throw her own head back, the sensation so sharp and exquisite, her eyes watering with pent-up need to come. When he looked up at her, flat tongue dragging broad strokes up the center of her, she almost crumbled, thrusting her hips toward his face, but then the bastard backed away, kissing her spread thighs, adjusting her legs over his shoulder. He grinned into her pussy like they were sharing secrets between them. 

“Let me– oh!” she cried, one of his hands flattening against her belly, two fingers thrust inside her. If his mouth was capable of wicked things, his thick fingers were twice as devious. Mia felt a collapse coming, building up and up just to fall. 

She began to whine, from the back of her throat, hips moving wildly now, grinding herself against his face. She threw her head back again and closed her eyes, concentrating on the sensation of his tongue, his hand pressing down, his fingers crooked up. “I'm– I’m going to come,” she managed to croak, in between gasps where she got absolutely no air, her body clenching tight. He sucked hard on her clit and she broke apart, unable to hold back her cries, wave after wave of bliss spreading through her all the way to her toes and the roots of her hair. 

Mia was not given a reprieve, Rylen scooting up her body as she came down, angling her face toward his as he took the last gasps of her pleasure for himself with a kiss, his two fingers still inside her, working her. 

“Fuck, yer so wet,” he breathed against her lips. “Been wanting to do that for so long.” 

“Now your turn,” she said, pushing at his broad shoulders. There were freckles there at the tops from running around shirtless in the sun and Mia wiped her mouth across the satiny skin, breathing out, “I came on your face and now I get to taste you too.” 

“Mia,” he groaned, letting her lead him to his back. “Yer killing me with that mouth.” 

“Just you wait,” she promised, moving over him, settling between his thighs. She pulled off his briefs without preamble, not able to be so smooth as he, and took his pretty cock in her hand as it bobbed up from where it had been trapped against his stomach. “Do you want to come in my mouth or–” 

“Next time,” he rushed, finishing her thought. “I've no doubt yer mouth will feel amazing but I want tae fuck ye for the first.”

“Okay.” She blushed, licking up the underside of his length while her hand stroked down. “Tell me when to stop,” she said, taking him into her mouth, humming when she got the salty taste of his arousal on her tongue. 

“Dinnae think it will be much longer,” he moaned, eyelids heavy. “Yer such a good lass, I love the way ye look with me in your mouth.”

She hummed in agreement, going to earnest work, setting pace, taking as much as she could without gagging herself (that could be later too), working him up to a squirming mess, big legs restless on either side of her body. Mia looked up under her lashes as he had done to her, and stoked him below, fondling him in one hand as the other met her lips, over and over. 

“Alight, maker, that's —” 

She pulled off with suction, the satisfying pop of release and the jerk of his abdomen contracting from the sensation making her grin like a fool. She crawled back up the bed, his hands all over her in an instant, running up and down her back, tracing her hips, touching her pussy again to see if she was still wet. 

“I am,” she said. “You make me so needy, you know. I’m always touching myself thinking of you, and once is never enough. Half the time we get off the phone and I have to come again, thinking about what we just did.” 

He groaned in misery. “Yer so goddamn perfect,” he swore, flipping over her again. “I love everything about ye.” Mia wrapped her legs around him and lifted her hips. The proof of his wanting was hot against her, thick and solid. She squirmed against it, a little thrill in her belly at knowing he’d be inside her soon. 

“I have an IUD,” she said, dragging her hips to force her pussy hard against him to make up for the very unsexy statement. His cock rubbed against her clit and she sucked in air between her teeth before saying, “you can fill me up all you like.” 

“Fuck me. Maker almighty, Mia ye can't say my things like that without warning me.” He dropped his face into her neck. “Yer gonna make me spout off before I can get inside ye at this rate.” 

“I won’t say another word.” 

He brought his head up, locked eyes with her. “Nae that won't do either. I want ye talking me through it, ye ken?” She nodded and he pressed inside her fully, a swift, decisive thrust, as she was distracted by the shared gaze. Her lips fell open and a strangled sound came out. “Ye like it when I'm deep in ye?” 

Mia nodded, unable to speak past the lump in her throat. Andraste at the pyre – he felt amazing and he hadn't moved past the initial thrust, just held her there on the edge of things, cradling her head like she was a treasure, sneaky grin waiting on her to reply. She was sure he wasn't going to move a muscle until he got what he asked for. 

“A moment ago ye were able to ask me to spill in ye, and now ye cannae say a word? What happened?” His grin grew bigger as her nails bit into his upper arms, as she squirmed against the urge to move against him, have him fuck her truly. 

“I want ye tae talk tae me. Are ye gonna be a good lass and tell me everything naughty that comes to ye?” 

She nodded, desperate, choking out a strangled please. He raised his eyebrows and angled his head as if asking for elaboration. 

“Rylen, fuck me, please I can't take this –” 

“There's a good lass.” 

He kissed her, moving as she wanted, driving into her only to pull back, hesitating at the edge of her pussy, cock head barely inside but brushing against her, the first stretch that had her sweating all of a sudden, her knees shaking. 

“You are so fucking cruel,” she said, trying to press up, but he snatched her hip and held her in place. It worked, it worked too well, being held still. Mia felt like all her muscles would snap, her bones would crack, if this man wouldn’t stop teasing her desperately aroused soul.

“I think ye need a little more patience is all.”

“Rylen! I swear to the maker I will strangle you if—” 

“The threats are working for me, aye,” he laughed, fucking her as she wished. But this was now the other side of the coin where it was becoming too much too quick. He leaned back hoisting her up further into his lap so she could see exactly how they were joined together, the glide of his cock, wet from her want, the obscene stretch of her pussy.

Mia gasped on thin air. “That's– your making me so wet.” She was so turned on she could feel the proof of it running down her backside, hear the squelch of their bodies coming together in such a tight space. Rylen let out a series of low curses.

She wrenched her eyes shut and just listened to him get there, while his hand came down to stroke her clit as he pumped into her. “Your so good,” she cried out, “keep touching me.” 

She grabbed back, gripping the comforter for dear life. “Ye look so bonnie like this, mo leannan, stretched out on my cock.”

She knew from the patient, loving tone exactly what he'd said, satisfaction gathering again at the base of her spine, beneath her belly. “Rylen,” she warned, arching her back, “baby, I'm going to come again, keep doing that– it feels so good when you rub my clit– I'm going to come so hard I–” 

Stars streaked behind her eyelids as the pleasure struck her at the center, both from where he was stroking with his hand and his cock, something she had only ever managed by herself before with a dildo and a vibrator. The pleasure felt so intense it almost hurt, just on the edge of too much, her pulse pounding in her ears louder than her cry as she twisted against the sensations wracking through her. 

When he finished too, coming inside her as promised, he collapsed forward, breathing hard, hands soothing up and down her sides as she dared open her eyes again. The inside of her felt like a wrung out rag, twisted out of sorts, emptied. Her knees still shook, wobbly legs useless, and Mia stopped trying to hold them up. Rylen eased out much more circumspect than he'd been diving in, then collapsed beside her. His chest rose and fell dramatically, since he'd been the one expending all the effort, and his hand wandered over to grab the meat of her thigh. 

“Don't, don't,” she tensed, worried he was about to start something else. She needed a moment. 

“Yer safe from me, lass. I dinnae have a drop left in me, it's all in ye.” 

Mia laughed so hard she snorted, covering her face with a hand. Could she die of laughter? Rylen joined in too, a low chuckle, turning to his side so he could bury his head against her neck. In time they calmed down, amused by one another, enamoured completely. He kissed the side of her neck, then her face, her ear, any place he could easily reach. “Mo leannan,” he whispered against her between delicate presses of his mouth. My sweetheart. 

Mia's heart was so full she struggled on the edge of tears, sighing and biting a lip to keep it back. Her emotions had pinged back and forth for the last day, highs and lows so far apart her emotional cord stretched thin, liable to fray. Coming so hard it left her limbs useless and still shaking didn't help either. She had told Rylen with some dignity that she wasn’t fragile like a bird, but here she was, sputtering over the softness of his attention.

“Dinnae fash,” he murmured, knowing her well. He pulled her body closer so they faced one another. The strokes of his hands on her back loosened the floodgates further, like he was coaxing the pressing emotions out. Knowing him, like she did so well, that's exactly what he was trying to do. 

“Ye can cry if ye need tae. I’m right here, sweetheart.” 

III. 

If a few tears of his joined with Mia’s when she had herself a good cry, it was nothing to be ashamed over. Rylen had been spent, physically, mentally and near emotionally, driving through the night after his shift like a man possessed to knock down her door. 

He was very polite about the knocking when it came to it, and only mildly irritating given the whole misunderstanding had been because Mia wouldn’t pick up the damn phone. 

His hesitation to reciprocate his feelings may have had something to do with it as well, and after a solid nap consisting of several hours tucked into Mia’s side, he felt ready to clear the air fully. Waking her though had been a test he’d not studied for, wondering how annoyed she would be if he woke her (likely too annoyed to laugh) and how it was she could continue sleeping when he was the one with the least rest between them. 

Easier tae sleep with a clear conscience. 

When she did blink awake in his arms, a good hour after he’d stopped pretending he could fall back down, her look of remembrance was so encouraging he swooped forward to kiss her silly. Was there anything better than a cuddle and a snog? He didn’t think so. 

Mia ended up spread over his body, her chin resting on her folded hands over his chest, her soft belly pressed against his groin. There wasn’t any heat there. He hadn’t lied before – he needed a few more hours of sleep and a meal before he could even consider pulling her beneath him again to make love. And he would, there were many things he still wanted to do, he just had nothing in him left to do it.

“Walk me through it,” she said, eyes shining with mischief, knowing he disliked the weight of a heavy, pointed question.

“I didn’t mean for it tae happen that way, Mia. Ye surprised me is all. I was sitting there thinking I was going tae be talking absolute filth and ye started tae look like ye might regret what ye had tae say, as if someone had killed my dog and ye had tae tell me the news. I thought,” he swallowed here, anxious, “I was maybe doing ye a favor if it was going tae be the end.”

“You really wanted to make it easier for me if I was trying to break up with you?”

“More or less – I dinnae like the idea of being the source of yer pain, sweetheart.”

She picked up a hand and poked his side, hard. “What’s that for?” Her hand folded back under her chin. Mia had reached a state of calm and equilibrium that Rylen wished he too could reach. Maybe after that supper and another round between her legs, enjoying her cunt. 

“Don’t do that again,” she said, firm. “I know I need you and maybe we should talk about how much, but that’s not fair to either of us.”

“Aye.” he agreed, rubbing his side. “But I like taking care of ye. Someone should, ye have done enough taking care of others and nae yerself.”

“Alright, later,” she mandated, and he nodded his head in agreement. Anything she asked for. “But I don’t understand why once you knew my feelings, you kept acting like a dick.”

He laughed, shaking her on his chest. She was smiling benevolently, but not laughing, which meant he was a cock just like she said he’d been. Rylen trailed his hands up her arms to cup her heart-shaped face in his palms. She put the stars to shame – looking at her almost hurt, and the more he did it, the more he felt he had to look away, less she slip from his grasp. He couldn’t believe he was lucky enough to steal glimpses of her light. 

“If ye dinnae ken that I can be an insufferable git, then ye should brace yerself, lass. Sometimes I dinnae act in my best interests.” He tweaked her chin. “I had told myself that only once ye said it tae me, that then I would tell yer bonnie brother. I did nae want tae do it yet and break what peace we had, which is why I froze.”

“Do you need me to do it? We had a good talk, actually. Cried a bit.”

“Nae doubt, lass.” He concentrated on her lips, rubbing his thumb on the seam of her pout. “But I already did. Wanted to come after ye straight away but I hardly could without yer address.”

“Of course!” Mia closed her eyes and shook her curly head. “I forgot about that part.”

“Aye. He was surprised of course, but in a good mood since I caught him heavy handed with his boss trapped beneath him on the desk. First he wanted to punch me, of course, but after she left, we had an honest conversation. Everything is fine. He made me work the shift anyway out of spite, the right bastard. But he gave me the rest of the week off. Figured since I was likely going tae the same wedding.”

“Good guess,” she smiled. “Next time I won’t intentionally dodge your calls though. I was scared because I…”

“Aye, I know, sweetheart. If it helps, I feel it too. Yer nae alone in feeling like ye have been handed the moon at last and ye dinnae ken how ye can possibly hold ontae it.” 

# 

1 Firstfall at 4:27 PM

Ye looked gorgeous walking yer wee sister down the aisle, lass

Gave me goosebumps but ye always do 

And it gave me ideas for later 

 

5:20 PM 

You look so good in that suit. 

I nearly had a bloody nose there. 

Who are you sitting with?

 

Yer brother’s girlfriend 

Luckily I do know someone else at this wedding 

Ye will like her

 

When we get to the dance, you will have to introduce us. 

Cullen will fail at this part otherwise. 

 

Oh dinnea fash she agrees with ye there

 

Ah, sorry, my speech is next.

Gotta go.

 

6:09 PM  

I wanted tae wait until ye were done tae tell ye

Ye made me tear up good job sweetheart 

And yer wee brother’s a riot

 

Shit!!

Don’t get me started on Branson. I dread you two meeting already.

I will never know peace again in my life. 

 

Nae, but ye love me for it

I do. 

I love you.

 

Tòrr gaol mo leannan

I can’t wait tae have ye in my arms again

I'm never going tae let ye go

 

***

Notes:

I hope that this was in line with the spirit of your request. It really gripped me quite hard, as you can likely tell, and I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed making it for you.

Honestly, I didn't need to fall in love with Rylen (and Mia) but here we go.

...

that brìgh mhòr ann - there's great meaning in it