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“No way, dude, it’s never gonna happen,” Liam said from his position on the floor.
He leaned his head back on the couch cushion. “People are gonna think I’m just an immature moron forever.”
Jordan laughed. “Chill out dude, you’re just a late bloomer, it happens.”
He shrugged, shifting his attention from FIFA for a second to offer Liam a sympathetic smile.
Liam blushed and glanced away, not wanting to linger too much. He’d decided to stay out of this match, he'd been feeling off all day.
He continued, letting out a frustrated sigh. “But I’m already 18, people are mated by now. No one who already has their dynamic will even look at me.”
Pheromones were such a big part of society, they gave dimension to a person. A sign that they were no longer children. Someone who carried no scent was considered by many as flat, uninteresting, unattractive. That had been Liam’s life so far. He went through all 4 years of high school progressively turning into a ghost.
As people close to him started to present, they pulled farther and farther away. The only people that stuck around him were his dumbass brother, Dylan, and his childhood friend, Jordan.
“I might as well just go to a cave somewhere and live as a hermit.”
Jordan snorted. “You’d get eaten by bats, day one.”
Liam’s laugh got interrupted by Dylan snoring behind them.
He snorted at his brother, shaking his head.
Dylan liked to walk around dressed like a skater bro even though they’d never owned a skateboard. He wore his dark blond hair long enough to touch his jaw. Liam’s hair had a similar shade, both inherited it from their mother. And though Liam let his touch his eyebrows, he kept it cropped short around the ears.
His older brother was a lazy prick that would sleep anywhere you put him. Current Top 3 were in a Poodle’s dog bed, while leaning on a doorframe and mid sex (allegedly).
Most often though, he’d take their couch, the same one he was sleeping on at the moment, leaving Jordan and Liam to sit on the floor.
Treating Liam like a baby seemed to be his favorite pastime, which infuriated the younger brother to no end. The stubborn bastard always liked to drag all of them to Los Chicos to eat some enchiladas every chance he got (He was a bitch for Mexican food).
He was also the kind of person who was the life of the party. Being that sociable was definitely a genetic trait that hadn’t been passed down to Liam.
He was an Alpha idiot, but Liam loved him anyway.
“Trust me, presenting doesn't mean inherent maturity, it’s about how you carry yourself. You’re already doing better than you think.” Jordan offered.
Liam could only stare at his friend. Jordan always seemed to find a way to make him feel understood.
Jordan and Dylan were the same age, both 20 and already studying at Amherst College a few hours drive from Lincoln. Liam was a bit younger. He’d just graduated high school and was looking forward to moving to Amherst as well to attend UMass Amherst for Biology. Despite it not being at the exact same institution, they’d still be able to meet up.
Because they were on the same grade at school, his brother and Jordan had always been closer. That sometimes made Liam feel like the annoying little brother that insisted on tagging along.
He didn’t let the feeling of being an outsider stop him from hanging out, though. Even with his insecurities, many of his most cherished memories were tied to the three of them together.
Like when Dylan went through a fisherman phase and got slapped in the face by a spiteful bass when he was 16.
Or when they tried to teach Liam street hockey and ended up laughing their asses off after he fell face first onto the asphalt when he was 12.
Or when they stole from their mom’s wallet and bought a ton of candy when he was 10 (Jordan hogged all the Skittles and later puked them all back up).
Jordan used to be their neighbor many years ago. Even though Liam and Dylan had moved to the other side of Lincoln, all three of them stuck together. They’d always had more fun when Jordan was around—his nonchalant attitude could make even the quietest moment hilarious.
He was tall as shit, and with the broad shoulders nobody was surprised when he presented as an Alpha. He wore his straight dark hair short, just down to his forehead. With his deep brown eyes, along with tan skin, he’d been chased by every Omega at the Lincoln Valley High School.
He had a bad case of resting death glare, and it wasn’t helpful that he was always wearing black. According to himself, he wasn’t a goth, it was just too difficult to match colors.
Coming from a family of musicians he seemed to know how to mess around with every instrument. He could play a mean quartet with his mom, dad and younger sister Dana. The coolest part was that none of them seemed to limit themselves to a single genre, everything was game at the Vera household.
His other younger sister, little Maya, had just turned 4. It was adorable to see her and her giant, all black-wearing, brother having a tea party.
Despite not usually being chatty, he and Liam could talk for hours, especially when Dylan would black out somewhere. He had a way of always making Liam feel more at ease when his anxiety got the better of him.
He was softer than he looked, and Liam loved him.
Yep.
Loved him.
The classic, but problematic, “in love with my brother’s best friend that is probably straight” kind of love.
And that was only half of the issue.
During his growth spurt he surpassed Dylan in height by quite a few inches. Not a terribly difficult feat but still. Of course, he was not as tall as Jordan, the man was a lamppost. And though he was a bit wiry, he had some “meat on his bones” as his grandma liked to point out. That had most people affirming confidently that he was going to present as a handsome Alpha.
So that only complicated things. Alphas didn’t usually get with Alphas. There was an instinctive incompatibility that would make the mixture of scents unpleasant. So there was that, he was fucked.
His internal considerations were punctuated by a painful tightening of his stomach. Oh, good.
The clenching of muscles was followed by more abdominal pain. Liam winced.
Dylan’s phone went off, startling him awake. He heard his brother pick up but ended up tuning out the one sided conversation.
Once the call was finished he got up from the couch. Still half awake he mumbled, “Kayla invited me to her place, her parents are out for the rest of the day.”
Jordan snorted.
“Can I take your car?” Dylan asked nonchalantly.
“Sure, it’s not like I was going to do anything more important than your dick appointment,” Jordan replied with a smirk.
“Cool, thanks.” Dylan was already picking up Jordan’s keys on the glass plate by the door.
“God, ever since Kayla presented as Omega it’s like they can’t get enough of each other.” Liam rolled his eyes.
“At least all those years of him obsessing over her paid off.”
His stomach gave an uncomfortable rumble. Goddamn it.
“I’m not feeling very well, I’m gonna try to sleep it off or something.”
“You alright?” Jordan turned at him as he stood.
“Yeah, just gonna lay down for a sec.”
He heard Jordan acknowledge his statement and turned to find his bedroom on the second floor.
His room was unusually hot so he removed his shirt and pants to cool off. Finally, he crashed on the mattress and almost immediately he was unconscious.
—
His head was spinning. For a second he didn’t know where he was. The image of his messy desk came into focus in front of him. That’s when the world went right side up and he was able to think.
Assessing himself, he immediately noticed that his earlier discomfort had turned into pain. His lower abdomen throbbed as if someone was wringing out his internal organs. A weak groan sounded in his throat.
It was hot, way too hot. Sweat dripped down his exposed back and drenched the covers.
Another burst of pain caused him to curl further into himself.
What the fuck was happening?
He tried to shift, look around, call for help, but came to a sudden stop as his erection dragged against the fabric of his boxers.
A surprised moan left his lips, it was almost too much. A spike of lust crawled up his back like a shiver. He couldn’t help but press the heel of his hand firmly over his groin. A louder moan followed and he felt something wet flow between his cheeks.
His eyes widened.
He was presenting.
He was presenting as an Omega.
It seemed everybody was wrong. He had not grown up to be a big strong Alpha just like his brother. He twisted on the bed as another wave of pain reached him, he could only clench his teeth and groan.
“Liam?”
Oh no.
“Liam, you alright, man?”
No, no, no.
Jordan.
Jordan was here. He was going to see him pathetically writhing on his sweat soaked sheets. He felt the shame and humiliation creep up his neck. At the same time, the lust that shot up his body was unlike anything he’d ever experienced.
Would Jordan be disgusted? Would he pity Liam? Would he leave?
Liam barely had time to sit up on the bed, turning toward the door, and there was Jordan. Staring at him, eyebrows pressed in confusion for a moment. Suddenly they rose up in understanding.
Liam was too afraid to speak. He felt tears welling up and averted his eyes from his friend, fearing what his face would show next. Still, he couldn’t help the hurt from rising in his chest when he heard Jordan’s steps move away. When his navel clenched painfully again he let his tears fall.
—
Pick up. Pick up. Pick up.
Pick up the fucking phone, Dylan!
Of all the times for his friend to have a fuck session with his girlfriend.
What was he gonna do? Liam was presenting as an Omega. When Jordan realized what was happening in Liam’s room all it took was a breath and he knew he was fucked.
Liam’s scent was wonderful, the most alluring one he’d ever come across. He had to run downstairs to get his phone, Dylan needed to be home, now.
If he got too close to Liam he wasn’t sure he would be able to stop himself. It was already hard enough dealing with the inappropriate feelings he’d developed for his best friend’s little brother.
He couldn’t help it, Liam was such a sweet person, so warm and compassionate. Jordan loved to make him laugh, just a smile sent his heart fluttering. It was always a pleasure to hear his excited rants about the latest thing he discovered.
Even when he got keyed up, he’d start rambling and it was so endearing. It was always a struggle not to not pull him against his chest and tuck his head under Jordan’s chin.
With these feelings weighing on him, how the fuck was he supposed to handle this situation?
He wasn’t sure how he’d be able to stay calm and collected to deal with such a serious situation while his own desires were overwhelming. He ran his hand over his face.
His call log to Dylan read 7. The monotone beeping of call number 8 was not promising.
He better not be balls deep in Kayla right now or Jordan was going to fucking kill him.
He heard a painful groan coming from upstairs.
Shit.
He ran back to Liam’s room. From outside the door he could see Liam curled up into himself, sweaty and flushed. One hand was clutching his stomach tightly. Through those thick blond lashes Jordan could see that he was crying.
Before he knew it, he’d rushed forward and knelt down, touching Liam’s shoulder gently.
“Liam, I’m sorry… It would be better if I could take you to a hospital or a carehouse but Dylan took the car. I tried calling him but he’s not picking up. I don’t know when he’ll be back.”
Liam didn’t reply, just shut his eyes tightly and tensed his whole body. He was clearly in pain and Jordan had no idea what to do.
“Fuck, it hurts…” Liam said quietly.
“I know…” Jordan tried to brush his thumb in a comforting manner across Liam’s shoulder and saw him shudder.
“Shit.” The curse snapped out of him, sharp and bitter, at his own uselessness.
He tried to pull his hand away but Liam quickly grabbed his wrist pressing his palm back against his own shoulder, expression panicked.
“No, no! Please! Please don’t leave! Please!”
“I won’t, I won’t!” Jordan hurried to calm his friend. “I promise. I’m right here with you, alright?”
Liam nodded but pressed Jordan’s hand tighter against his skin.
Jordan placed a hand on the blond strands of Liam’s hair and started stroking lightly. Liam leaned into his touch and Jordan’s heart clenched.
“Fuck.” He was lost. He couldn’t just sit here and watch Liam suffer.
Goddamn it.
“Is there anything I can do to make things better?”
Liam opened his blue eyes and Jordan could see hesitation glaring back at him.
“Can you just… just keep touching me for a while…?”
Jordan had to swallow before answering. “Of course I can.”
He started running his hands on Liam’s naked arms and back gently. Slowly he noticed Liam’s body losing some of the tension it carried. When he heard his friend let out a tight breath and finally sink into the mattress, he sighed in relief.
However, when he glanced back at Liam his eyes were heated, pupils wide. He couldn’t look away. Kneeling next to the bed, frozen, as Liam’s hand came up and curled around his neck. His fingers teasing in his short hair.
“Can I… can I scent you?”
Heat flooded Jordan’s cheeks and his pants. He’d imagined Liam scenting him before—granted, under very different circumstances—but now it only made him feel guilty. He felt like he was taking advantage of Liam’s vulnerable state to feed his own fantasies.
He pushed the thought aside, feeling a bit disgusted with himself. It didn’t matter, if it would help lessen Liam’s pain, he would do it. He carefully leaned forward but Liam pulled him firmly onto the bed. Their chests collided and Jordan was completely covering him.
He tried to recover and managed to pull himself away enough so they were both laying in bed, side by side, facing each other.
Liam was immediately drawn to Jordan’s neck. Just the feeling of Liam’s breath on his sensitive skin was maddening. And with Liam’s own scent so close to his face he was almost dizzy.
Then Liam kissed him.
Kissed his throat, close to his jaw. He couldn’t help the spark of arousal that travelled south.
He clenched his teeth. “Liam…?”
It came out weak and he wasn’t sure if it was a question or a moan. For a second, he felt nothing as Liam seemed to have stopped breathing against his neck.
There was a quiet whisper. “I—I’m sorry, I just—I just want to and I can’t…”
Jordan noticed Liam moving his hips and glanced down. He’d been avoiding it because he knew what he’d see. Liam’s boxers were clearly tented and there was a large wet spot on it.
He couldn’t let himself be affected by it. He tried taking a deep breath but it was no help, he just inhaled more of Liam's beautiful, magnificent scent. Liam’s hand clutched onto Jordan’s black shirt. His fingers were trembling.
His voice sounded shaky when he muttered, “Jordan… can I…?”
Before Jordan could wonder what it was, Liam's left leg curled around his right calf and was pulling his thigh slowly so it rested between both of Liam’s.
Understanding dawned on Jordan and the pull on his navel only became stronger.
Fuck.
He had to close his eyes and take a breath before saying, “Sure, it’s okay…”
The movement started against him immediately and he kept his eyes shut, trying to focus on anything else. He couldn’t spring a knot because of his defenseless friend.
That was a mistake, however, when the darkness made everything sound clearer. That included Liam’s voice. It was quiet but so close to his ear he could hear it perfectly.
He could hear every moan, every exclamation or noise that came out of Liam’s mouth. It was as if an electric current passed through him. It sounded like bliss. He could feel himself become impossibly harder in his pants.
Liam’s thrusting was speeding up. Jordan hoped that after his friend climaxed he’d be able to find some relief. It was all that mattered to him at that moment.
A whisper of Liam's fingers brushed under Jordan’s shirt, hesitantly moving upwards across Jordan’s back. Despite the tight manner their bodies were pressed together, that touch felt like the most intimate contact they had shared so far.
The careful touch of Liam’s palm against Jordan’s skin seeped tender and warm. A second later Jordan shuddered at the feel of open lips on his throat. Liam’s hand tightened and dragged against his back.
He had to bite his tongue to stop a moan from coming through as nails raked across his skin.
His hips stuttered forward when Liam pulled at the hairs on the back of his neck and he struggled to silence himself.
When it appeared Liam’s rutting was reaching its crest, he pressed tightly to Jordan’s jeans and stopped. He started shaking, curling further onto himself, sobs wrecking his body.
“I can’t—It won’t—”
Jordan’s heart was aching. While one arm cradled Liam’s face against his neck the other curled around his friend's body pulling him close and petting his hair.
He’d heard that some Omegas couldn't get off on their own during heats, he’d just been desperately hoping this wasn’t the case.
“It’s gonna be okay, Liam. It’s gonna be okay.” He tried to soothe the shaken man in his arms.
He barely registered Liam moving before a hand was tightening around the waistband of his jeans, pulling it down. Jordan grabbed Liam’s wrist to stop the motion.
“No!” Jordan exclaimed, louder than he intended to. “Liam, this is not—You don’t—”
“Why not?! Alphas are always saying they’ll fuck any Omega bitch they can find. Why can’t you fuck me?!” Liam pleaded with red rimmed eyes.
Jordan’s heart broke. “Liam, you’re not an Omega bitch. You’re… You’re everything but. Please don’t think that.”
He gazed into Liam’s dark blue eyes trying to impart his sincerity. His friend just hid his face in his chest as another wave of pain seemed to reach him.
Quietly, he muttered, “Please, Jordan, please… I know you don't want me but…”
He pulled Liam closer to his chest, revelling in his presence for a moment. He allowed himself a thought—what if they weren’t in this situation?
He’d be overjoyed to be holding Liam like this. If Liam was his and he were Liam’s. How ecstatic he’d be.
Unfortunately, that would never happen because he was about to cross a line.
Jordan’s heart filled with dread for what he was about to do. One of his hands slowly slid down Liam’s back and went under the elastic of his boxers just so it was covering the tips of his fingers. Liam gasped and turned to look at Jordan.
He tried but couldn’t swallow through his tight throat. With a pained, guilty expression he asked,
“Is this okay?”
Liam still looked wide-eyed but nodded and answered, “Yes.”
Jordan’s hand kept moving downwards, slipping into Liam’s cleft.
Liam gasped against his throat.
Jordan couldn’t help but shiver. He reached Liam’s hole but had to move past it. His intention was to reach the small stretch of skin below.
He applied a bit of pressure and Liam’s eyes fluttered shut, letting a moan fall free from his throat. Jordan kept applying and releasing pressure. He varied speed and intensity until he found a rhythm that had Liam thrusting backwards into his hand.
“Jordan… Jordan—” The sound of his name on Liam’s lips was a sin. He should’ve not been allowed to enjoy it, and yet, he was harder than he’d ever been.
When he slightly increased the speed of his movements, Liam started licking his neck and he couldn’t help the moan that escaped him. His own hips started unconsciously pressing against Liam’s naked thigh.
As he sped up again, Liam whimpered as he tried to reach his release. Jordan was now practically rutting against Liam’s own rigid member. Both of them seemed to be reaching a turning point.
Liam’s hand slid to Jordan’s cheek, for a second it was just the two of them. No heats or Omegas and Alphas, no pain. Just them.
Liam pulled close. “Kiss me.”
Jordan didn’t waste time. Their kiss was intense from the beginning. He lifted his other hand to slip his fingers into Liam’s hair, enjoying the soft textures.
With their mouths still intertwined they both came undone together, only separating when they needed air. When they pulled apart Jordan was so content, just staring at Liam’s kiss swollen lips. Body still vibrating from the pleasure of their release.
The other man smiled shyly at him and he reciprocated the gesture. He approached again but waited for Liam to close the distance. When he did, Jordan kissed him slowly, hoping to cherish the moment.
And then it all went to shit.
“What the fuck?!”
Both Liam and Jordan startled toward the open door. Standing there was Dylan, his face furious—irate.
Jordan knew what he was seeing. The Omega heat scent, the slick, the Alpha orgasm and of course, the bulge in Jordan’s pants, his knot evident and damning.
He tried to call out, “Dylan, wait!”
But Dylan was already across the room, fisting Jordan’s shirt and pulling him away from Liam. Jordan barely had the time to get to his feet before Dylan punched him square in the face.
He fell back and Dylan was on him. Hit after hit, Jordan wasn’t even trying to defend himself. It was probably less that he deserved for what he’d done.
He heard a shout. “Dylan!” And his attacker was pulled away from him.
Quickly getting to his feet he saw Liam and Dylan tangled on the floor.
It didn’t stop Dylan from shouting, “Get out! Get the fuck out of my house!”
Jordan spared Liam one last panicked glance before he rushed out, got in his car and left.
It wasn’t until he parked in his driveway and sat in his car, stunned, that he noticed his face was a mess of blood. His cheek, eyebrow and forehead were quickly swelling. Blood was pouring from a cut in his eyebrow. He was still panting as if he’d run the whole way home.
He leaned forward against the steering wheel and tried to pull himself together.
He couldn’t.
“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!”
His fists slammed down hard on the dashboard. Grabbing at his hair with both hands he jerked, feeling the painful tug to his skin.
What was he gonna do now?
He felt like crying but didn’t think he deserved to feel sorry for himself.
He couldn’t even blame them, he’d abused Liam, his trust and his body. If he had an Omega sibling he’d have reacted exactly like Dylan if someone took advantage of them like that.
In one afternoon he managed to fuck up two of the most meaningful relationships he’d ever had. What the fuck was he supposed to do now?
—
He was trying to explain.
“Dylan, it wasn’t like that. Nothing happened. We—!”
“The fuck ‘nothing happened’ when I can smell his cum in your sheets!”
“But he didn’t— We didn’t—!”
“I don’t care! He still put his hands on you!”
“But I—I asked him to!” Liam was shaking, the words were tripping out of his lips.
“It doesn’t matter! He could have done anything else, but he still chose to be a bastard and take advantage of you.”
Dylan’s pacing could have opened trenches on the floor.
Liam was stunned beyond words.
Dylan turned and pointed a finger to his brother’s face.
“You listen to me Liam. You stay the hell away from him from now on and I won’t have to kill the bastard.” He backed down slightly and shook his head. “I should press charges and let him be arrested for what he did.”
Liam widened his eyes and his jaw dropped ready to interject.
“I won’t.” Dylan added quickly. “Only because I don’t want you involved with any of that shit. But if I see you talking to him—a phone call, a text, a fucking email—and I will bring this to the police.”
He stormed off.
Leaving Liam lost and alone.
—
Liam had finally started his life at UMass. It wasn’t Amherst College, but at least he could see his brother anytime he wanted.
His classes had started a couple months prior for the Biology program and he was hesitantly excited for the rest of the year.
He ended up making some really nice friends in his Bio Lab class. They’d just successfully completed their first project of the semester. Jeremy suggested they should meet up outside of lab hours to do something fun. And after weeks of measuring enzyme activity all of them agreed.
It wasn’t hard to find The Hideout—you just had to follow the noise. The neon sign glowed above the doorway, booths were full and people had started leaning up against the graffitied walls inside.
Students were crammed into every corner, spilling out to the patio with pitchers and laughter. The place was definitely a hit.
A large TV showed the Amherst Mammoths against the Wesleyan Cardinals—the East Coast Conference semifinal.
Even in a crowded bar Liam could hear the cheering and groaning. The Mammoths were down by two and he could feel the tension among the purple-clad students.
He scanned the outside tables but didn’t spot anyone he knew. Then, through the glass, Ariana’s shock of red hair caught his eye. He chuckled before heading inside.
Just as he walked in, the Mammoths scored a touchdown and there was a commotion. He was trying to make it through when his eyes found Jordan’s.
Wide brown eyes, beer halfway to his mouth. Jordan. They hadn’t seen each other in months. Liam noticed he still wore all black, a comforting familiarity warmed his chest.
Jordan placed his beer on the table, ignoring the people talking around him. Liam was too afraid to step toward him so he chose to smile, a tentative gesture of reassurance.
Jordan’s eyes cast down to the beer bottle, discomfort flickering in his gaze. In barely a moment, he stood up, pulled money from his wallet and dropped it on the table. Never sparing Liam another glance, he walked out, ignoring his other friends calling his name.
Liam stood there, glaring at his feet. He’d thought there might’ve been a way to mend their relationship. Maybe that hope had been too naïve, or maybe he was just being overconfident. Either way there was nothing left he could do.
That didn’t make it hurt any less.
—
Liam’s place wasn’t too far. The night was chilly but he liked to walk. It gave him time to overanalyze whatever the fuck had happened back at The Hideout.
Maybe if he hadn’t…
It was pointless.
He couldn’t go back and change what happened. He was still an Omega, he still loved Jordan, he’d still coerced him…
He was brought out of his thoughts by a sudden noise. He thought, at first, that it was a cat and started to look for it.
That was until he saw Jordan, sitting on the curb between two parked cars. There was a collection of beer cans at his feet, one still in his hand. His gaze was far and his eyes glossy.
Liam was almost shivering under his coat but noted Jordan’s simple black shirt. He shouldn’t be out here like this.
“Jordan?” he called out.
No response, not even a flinch.
“Jordan.” He approached and spoke louder. The man turned towards him but seemed to be having trouble finding his face.
“It’s too cold. You should go home.”
“Hn.” He turned back.
“Jordan, you can’t—” He barely touched his shoulder when Jordan jolted up. His spilled beer, forgotten at their feet.
“Don’t fucking touch me!” Liam could barely understand the words.
The man was staring at him, resting death glare in full effect. Liam realized how long it had been since it was directed at him. He’d become so used to his smirks and laughter, chuckles and conspiratorial smiles. A sadness panged in his chest.
“Jordan, please. I can’t let you stay out here.”
Liam moved closer, when Jordan didn’t pull away he saw it as a good sign.
“I’m not gonna hurt you.” He tried soothingly, and Jordan’s eyes looked clearer for a moment. Actually looking him in the eye.
“Come on, I’ll take you back home. Tomorrow we can figure this out.”
He reached out to touch his elbow, trying to guide him forward. The man stared at Liam’s hand for a long time before actually moving.
As they walked he noticed Jordan kept looking at him. It had him so confused, at some point he had to ask.
“What?” He stopped walking for a moment, letting his confusion show.
Jordan mumbled something unintelligible but raised his hand to rest on Liam’s arm. His fingers were frigid and Liam started to really worry about his health. When Jordan’s thumb started caressing his skin, Liam’s mouth dropped.
It felt so intimate, from someone who, 3 hours ago, had left his friends behind solely because Liam entered the room.
He’d been about to ask what Jordan was doing when he leaned forward and placed a kiss on his forehead. It was so tender, it left Liam breathless. And then, just as quickly, he’d returned to the angry stare, the glassy eyes.
Liam shook himself.
“Come on, man. Let’s get you out of the cold.”
Tomorrow was going to be a fun conversation. Liam sighed.
—
It was too bright.
Before Jordan even opened his eyes he knew that it was too bright. He shut them tighter and groaned. Damn, his head hurt.
When he finally managed to look ahead he realized he didn’t know this place. Where was he? Had he gone home with anyone from the bar? He couldn’t remember.
Then it flooded him. Seeing Liam and running away, the resurgence of all of the feelings he’d never manage to bury, the hurt he had caused, shoving anything alcoholic down his throat, running away like a coward. The pain was too recent and it still hurt like hell.
But what happened after that?
He started inspecting his surroundings.
Boxes on the corner. ‘Clothes’. ‘Kitchen’. Someone was moving in.
The mattress was sitting directly on the floor. Right next to it a lamp and a book, I Contain Multitudes by Ed Yong.
He turned and his eyes landed on Liam, sleeping peacefully on the other side of the mattress.
He jumped. Sliding to the floor and startling Liam from his sleep.
No, it wasn’t possible.
“No, no, no, no.”
With a wild look in his eyes he stood up and started moving away. He heard Liam’s voice calling his name but barely registered it.
“No—Fuck!”
This wasn’t supposed to happen. He’d done everything he could think of to leave Liam alone. To let him live his life in peace, and now this. He’d done it again. He’d once more taken advantage of an innocent person, someone he promised himself he’d never hurt again.
His intentions were to try and find his belongings so he could quickly leave the apartment. But his mind was in such a state that he just moved aimlessly around, cursing himself under his breath.
How could he have done this yet again? He felt panic well up behind his eyes but tried to swallow it back. One hand lifted to tug at his hair with a lot more force than was necessary.
He closed his eyes. “Shit!”
Suddenly there were hands on him. Holding his arms. Holding him still. He could hear someone calling his name over the ringing in his ears.
“Jordan? Please look at me.” Liam was standing firmly in front of him. He looked a bit rattled, but who wouldn’t be?
“I’m sorry.” It came out frail and broken from his lips but it was all he could say. “Shit, I’m sorry I—”
“It’s okay, Jordan,” Liam said, his voice an attempt at composure.
“No, it’s not okay! I didn’t mean to hurt you again. I’m sorry, I have to leave.”
Liam stepped in front of him. “No! Please, wait! Nothing happened!”
Jordan froze where he was.
“I was going home after leaving The Hideout and I found you on Main Street. I—I didn’t want to leave you alone so I brought you back here. We just slept, I promise.”
Jordan almost crumbled onto himself from the overwhelming relief. Closing his eyes, he let out a deep breath.
He shook his head. “Still, I should—”
“Can we talk?”
Tension crept back into his shoulders.
“I know we left things off in a bad way, and I understand if you don’t want to talk to me. I just—” Liam averted his eyes for a moment and glanced back at Jordan with sincerity. “I want to fix things.”
Jordan replied bitterly, “There’s nothing for you to fix. You did nothing wrong. I was the one that fucked up, that took advantage.”
Liam frowned. “From what I remember I was the one that asked you to. Fuck, begged you even.”
“That doesn’t matter.”
“What do you mean ‘it doesn’t fucking matter’?! I have a right to my choices too!”
“That’s not the point, Liam!”
“Then what is the point?!”
Both of them shouted, though neither seemed to be angry at the other.
“The point is—!” He cut himself off, frustrated. After a brief pause he continued in a quieter but heavy tone. “The point is, I was supposed to be your friend when you were vulnerable and instead I sexually assaulted you.”
The end of his sentence cracked in his throat, making evident how regretful he was.
“I ruined everything. You and Dylan are right to hate me for it. If anyone else had done that to you I’d do worse than just beating them up.”
“But it wasn’t—”
“You trusted me to take care of you and I fucked up! If you weren’t in heat, if you weren’t impaired, you’d have never chosen to let me do those things to you!”
“But I would have…”
That put a halt through Jordan’s emotional storm. He could only stare at Liam who was looking just a bit awkward after saying that. His eyes, evasive and face, flushed.
“The reason it was so hard to stop myself was because I’d already wanted it.”
It took him a moment to swallow. “I knew I shouldn’t. I hadn’t presented yet and everyone said I was going to be an Alpha like my brother, so it wouldn’t have worked anyway.”
He lifted his shoulders in a short shrug.
“That didn’t stop me from wanting it.” Liam glanced self-consciously at the floor.
As his hand travelled to the back of his neck, he continued. “While it was happening… I could only think of how happy I was that it was you next to me. I didn’t even consider how uncomfortable you must have been, to be forced to do those things to your best friend’s little brother.”
Liam appeared increasingly ashamed.
“I know you didn’t want me. I know that in the end I abused the kindness you offered me and it ruined our friendship. But when you say that I wouldn’t have chosen you… I—I’ve had feelings for you since I was fourteen, it wasn’t your fault.”
Jordan’s traitorous heart soared.
Despite all the guilt and the harsh words he’d turned on himself, knowing the person he loved returned his feelings sent a lightness through him.
But still, it wasn’t right.
“Liam…” Jordan rubbed his hands on his face.
“It wasn’t that I didn’t want you. I had feelings for you too, but that just makes it worse. Can’t you see that all the things that I did to you, I chose to do them. You trusted me and I broke that trust. I wanted those things to happen between us, of course not in that way, but still I let them happen when I shouldn’t have.”
“But you were just trying to help me…”
“It doesn’t matter—”
“It matters to me! You and Dylan won’t listen! Sure, you can say that you ‘took what you wanted,’ or whatever. But it was nothing more than what I was willing to give!” Liam paused, his breaths were coming in faster.
He seemed to deflate as he calmed down.
“I miss you, man. Even just as friends… Nothing is the same without you.”
Jordan chanced a look back at Liam who shrugged with a hesitant smile. “Who else is gonna hog all of the skittles if you’re not there?”
They both smirk at that.
“Can’t we just hang out? Like we used to.” Jordan looked at his feet, considering. He wanted that, more than anything, but did he deserve it? His eyes rose up as if drawn to Liam’s.
“Dylan won’t—”
“Fuck, Dylan!” Liam practically shouted, obviously not happy with his brother. “He was being an overprotective asshole! I’m not his to own, he doesn’t get to decide who I choose to be with. If he still has a problem with you he can fucking shove it up his ass.”
That made Jordan chuckle unexpectedly. The sound bubbled up his throat until it became painful laughter. His vision blurred and he could feel fat tears drop from his eyes. He couldn’t even tell if they were happy or sad tears, some part of him finally breaking. He brought a hand to his face.
“I’m sorry… I’m sorry, Liam. I’m so sorry…”
The sound came out muffled but he hoped Liam heard him. He hoped Liam understood that he was a mess and had been for the past few months.
He felt arms surrounding him firmly.
“It’s alright, man. You’re good. You don’t have to apologize.” He couldn’t help but hold Liam tightly against his chest. It felt like he could finally breathe after all that time.
“I missed you too…”
—
An hour later had both of them sitting on Liam’s living room floor, each with a good burger in their hands.
Liam finished chewing and drank some of his soda.
“You know… Dylan is pretty upset about this whole thing too.”
At Jordan’s startled glance he quickly corrected.
“Not at you! He’s just—I know he regrets the way he dealt with the situation. You know how stubborn he is. Admitting he was wrong is worse than cutting his balls off.”
Jordan snorted and shook his head fondly.
Liam’s smirk faltered. “But still, I know he misses you too. He’s probably embarrassed about how everything happened. If you want, I know he’d be willing to talk.”
Liam shrugged, anything but casual in Jordan’s eyes.
“I’m not that sure he’ll listen, but I think I’d hate myself if I didn’t try.”
He watched as Liam tried to hide his pleased smile and failed miserably.
He’d missed those.
—
They’d told Dylan that Jordan was coming over on the weekend. The last thing they wanted was to make him feel ambushed.
Still, Jordan was a bit terrified over Dylan’s reaction. They’d connected so immediately all those years ago. They'd never had an "acquaintances" stage before their friendship.
He’d barely stepped out of the car when Dylan opened the door. For a moment, both of them just stared at each other. And for the first time, Jordan couldn’t read his demeanor.
Dylan spoke up, “Let’s get inside.” And turned back into the house.
Liam nodded at Jordan with an encouraging smile and followed his brother through the door.
Jordan took a deep breath and did the same, even though his palms were sweating.
When all of them stood in the living room, Dylan sent Liam a meaningful glance and the younger man seemed to understand its purpose. Sparing his own warning gaze toward his brother, Liam quietly left the room.
His nerves grew as the sound of Liam’s steps faded upstairs.
Jordan sighed and he prepared for the worst.
Instead, he was met with a shifty, fidgety man. A stark difference from his usual confident attitude.
Dylan dropped on the couch so suddenly that Jordan froze.
Dylan brought his hands to his face.
“Are you gonna sit down or do I have to break my neck?”
The humor caught him off guard and he sat with a slight smirk on his lips.
There was a significant pause where Dylan sighed.
“Look, man… I don’t know what happened. Liam told me some of it and, honestly, I don’t wanna know the rest. But he told me you didn’t hurt him and… I know I assumed some things—” He swallowed.
“I don’t blame you for that.” Jordan’s anxious energy couldn’t help the interruption. “I’d have thought the same thing. And I’d have done worse if I thought someone had done that to Liam.” Jordan clutched his hands on his jeans.
“It was just—” Jordan continued after Dylan didn’t reply. “He was in so much pain, I felt so useless. I just wanted to help him, to make it better.” He was quick to add. “And I know I didn’t handle it how I should have. I know I truly fucked up.”
There was only silence for a few breaths.
“He doesn’t think so.”
When Jordan turned to Dylan he had an annoyed expression in his eye.
“He can be an insistent little shit when he wants to. Wouldn’t let up until I cracked.”
A warm feeling surged in Jordan’s chest.
“And that’s what I wanted to apologize for. I should have trusted the person I know you are. I shouldn’t have lashed out. I should have asked.” Dylan took a deep breath. “I was wrong and I kind of did beat you up for it. But to be fair you got with my little brother, I’m allowed to be at least somewhat protective.”
Jordan swallowed a smirk. “I’m also sorry for—”
“Oh, shut the fuck up. Your business is with him and y’all seem to have that figured out already. Can we please sort things out so I can stop thinking about my brother’s sex life?”
Jordan chuckled and offered Dylan his hand. The other man grasped it tightly as if they were about to armwrestle. He let out a sigh of relief.
“You guys cool yet?” Liam asked, halfway down the stairs.
“Yea, yea, you asshole! Get the fuck outta here!” Dylan shouted across the room.
Even from far away Jordan could see Liam smiling brightly at him. His laughter reached him and he climbed back up the stairs. He couldn't help the sappy smile that spread across his face. He hadn’t been that happy in a long time.
When he turned back to Dylan, his friend had a curious expression.
“So, you really like him, huh?”
“What?” Jordan’s heart just about leaped to his throat.
“You and Liam. I knew you’d been crushing on him for a while. Didn’t know it was that serious, though.”
“I—I—We don’t—”
“I know, douche canoe. Just stating facts. Like I said, your business is with him.” He stood up and moved toward the kitchen. “And remember to never tell me about it!”
Jesus fucking Christ!
His face was so hot it would have put radiators to shame.
At least things seemed to be returning to normal if Dylan was back to being a complete asshole.
And he was so glad for it.
—
He was thankful the cold weather had eased up a bit. Their back yard was full of people he’d never seen before and he was surprisingly fine with it. All of Dylan’s college friends roamed about eating and laughing. His brother was making the most of it.
Birthday boy’s big day had been a couple of weeks ago, but with finals week they had to reschedule. The ‘host’ role fit his brother perfectly. He could use up all of his social skills and got everybody enjoying the barbecue.
Liam was sitting on a bench close to the fence next to Jordan, finishing up a hot dog. They just sat, chatting amicably when Dylan rushed in between them.
“Hey! You guys good? Don’t shut yourselves off like a bunch of weirdos. My friends are great, go mingle.”
“If they’re anything like you, that would be inadvisable.” Jordan chuckled.
Dylan lifted an eyebrow. “You know there’s no one like me, I’m kind of a star.”
That had Jordan and Liam laughing hard.
After catching his breath, Liam advised, “Alright ‘Mr bright star’, you should probably go before the burgers catch on fire.”
His brother turned wide-eyed to flames rising from the grill.
“Shit! Markus! I told you to look at the meat!” he shouted and ran off.
Liam shook his head fondly.
Chancing a glance at Jordan, his mind raced.
He was overjoyed that everything had worked out between the three of them. But now he couldn’t help but remember what they’d said to each other that day.
I’ve had feelings for you since I was fourteen…
I had feelings for you too…
Was it too late to bring it up? Did he miss his chance?
He didn’t have the time or the mind to address it while it happened, his thoughts too preoccupied with more important things. Despite wanting a relationship with Jordan, his priority had been to make sure Jordan didn’t blame himself for what happened.
Just the thought of a possibility had his heart fluttering.
He had to try it at least. Their friendship had gone through worse and survived, right? He just hoped that if things went to shit now, it wouldn't be as bad as it had been.
He watched Jordan’s hand, resting on the bench between them. He took a deep breath and held it in his chest, when his lungs started hurting he finally let it out.
He placed his hand hesitantly on the back of Jordan’s. He was too nervous to lift his eyes to see his friend’s reaction.
“I don’t know if… if you still… um, I wanted to—Because of what we said that day and…” God, he was ruining this. “I just wanted to know if you’d like to go out sometime.”
He stopped to swallow, an unsuccessful attempt to unclench his throat. He knew his face was red with embarrassment. His heart, galloping in his chest.
When he opened his mouth to retreat his statement, Jordan’s hand flipped under his palm, coming to hold Liam’s fingers gently.
Liam lifted his eyes in surprise and watched Jordan’s gaze focused on their hands. His demeanor was almost shy as he caressed Liam’s knuckles with his thumb.
When he finally looked up there was pink on his cheeks and he wore a tentative smile.
“I’d like that,” he said.
—
They thought about going back to The Hideout. But it was the East Coast Conference Final and the Mammoths were playing, it would be packed.
So, they decided on a quieter bar on the far side of Main Street. There was even live music, which he earnestly enjoyed, and they’d been able to get a small table at the corner.
After getting something to drink, they talked—about classes and weird professors and their just-finished finals.
Jordan explained a bit of his International Human Rights Law class, which Liam decided was just a fancy name for common sense. That sparked a discussion over cultural relativism. Liam was a particularly avid listener as Jordan explained the nuances of Omega rights in conservative societies.
When Liam asked him about the future, Jordan admitted leaning toward intelligence analysis, but wanted to see how things developed further along.
They had quite a laugh when he heard about Liam’s Bio Lab adventures (or disasters as Liam had called it). Like when he forgot to close the centrifuge lid properly and it started rattling like it was about to take off. Half of the samples didn't survive and he swore his professor lost a little bit of his will to live.
Or when he dropped a pipette inside the vial for one of the histological stains and spent five minutes desperately trying to fish it out without his instructor noticing. All the while trying to shush Jeremy and Ariana’s laughter. They eventually helped him, but not before Liam’s face was redder than the Congo Red dye they’d just wasted.
He told Jordan about his friends, the ones he’d come to meet that night at The Hideout. He was glad Liam was surrounding himself with people that cared for him.
After a while he’d just stopped talking as he wanted to hear Liam tell him more about everything.
“Sorry, you haven’t said a word in a while. I feel like I’m just babbling my head off, I don’t mean to be annoying,” Liam amended sheepishly.
“I don’t mind.” Jordan’s smile widened. “I like hearing you talk.” He added honestly.
He could see Liam blushing and his smile grew fonder.
“Really? Even when I’m rambling like that?”
“Especially then. I like how you get excited about stuff. Always makes me see things in a new light.”
Liam’s smile was almost blinding. He loved that he could openly make that happen, he’d always had to hide his attempts before.
After a moment, Liam offered, “You do that too, quite a lot actually.”
Jordan quirked an eyebrow, curious.
“Everytime I’m panicking over something stupid, or anxious about things that will probably never happen… I don’t know, I always feel understood when we talk, you don’t act like I’m this crazy person. It makes me see things in a new light too.”
Jordan just wanted to melt around him.
“You also give the best advice, you know? Not just to me, to Dylan too. And that’s good because at least one out of the three of us should be sane, to balance things out.”
He couldn’t help but laugh. An honest, hearty laugh.
“I should start giving Dylan some bad advice, just to see what happens.”
That got Liam laughing too.
—
They were walking back to his place. Liam started getting nervous. He still hadn’t worked up the courage to even reach for Jordan's hand. They’d sort of held hands at the barbecue, but did that count? He’d never been on a serious date before.
Even through the cold, Liam was sweating.
Jordan smirked. “So, yea, I might be in a Jazz band now.”
“Only you could get wrapped in stuff like that, I swear.”
Jordan shrugged nonchalantly. “It was more of an accident really…”
“Sounds just like you.” Liam smiled up at Jordan who was already smiling back.
He turned to see they were already in front of Miller’s Auto Repair.
His apartment stared at him from the first of three floors above the shop. The all-day clanks and clatters brought the rent down enough that even Liam could afford it. Though at the late hour it sat quiet, eerily still.
He turned to face Jordan and shifted to the entrance. He put a hand in his jacket pocket and both of them heard the jiggle of his keys. He should probably say something
“Um…” He quickly averted his eyes from Jordan’s. He was so obviously nervous, they had to have noticed.
Liam’s heart was pounding. He felt a burst of uncharacteristic forwardness.
He reached out and wrapped his fingers around Jordan’s hand. He noticed the warm skin under his fingers right after he heard Jordan’s breath catch. He realized his hand must be freezing. As started pulling his hand away, Jordan’s fingers tightened around him.
His eyes jumped up to the other man’s face.
Jordan shifted his eyes away but quickly returned them to Liam.
“I’ve been wanting that,” he murmured, fingers squeezing Liam’s for a second. “I didn’t want to assume.”
Liam’s lips spread in a smile. His face was probably showing everything he was feeling. But after so many months of living a nightmare, blaming himself, he couldn’t care less.
Jordan’s hand cupped his neck. A cold thumb caressed his cheek.
It wasn’t a nightmare. It wasn’t a dream. This was real.
Liam leaned forward and let their lips touch
His smile widened into the kiss. His hand raised to wrap around Jordan’s wrist, allowing himself to caress the tan skin over the pulse.
Jordan was being so gentle. Almost guarding himself, as if Liam was going to break in his arms.
Liam was having none of that.
He didn’t want Jordan treating him like glass. He wanted Jordan fully.
He placed one hand on Jordan's shoulder and pressed forward. Opening his mouth, he teased Jordan with his tongue. In barely a moment, Jordan was pushing back. Their bodies tightly pressed against each other. The man’s open hand firm on his lower back, pulling them together.
This was what he wanted. No holding back, not for his sake. He wanted Jordan to feel as comfortable and open as Liam himself was trying to be.
A car passed by and, along with the strong highlights, the loud motor created a strong enough distraction to break their kiss.
They were both panting slightly, looking flushed.
Jordan cleared his throat and stepped back stating, “I should go.”
“I don’t want you to.”
“Liam…”
“Jordan.” Liam raised an eyebrow and both of them chuckled.
Liam continued, “You can go if you want to, just… you don’t have to.”
At Jordan’s silence Liam added, “I can make us some Pop-Tarts.” He chuckled at himself. “Sorry, I still don’t have much stuff upstairs.”
Liam watched expectantly as Jordan fought a smile and took a breath, considering.
The man leaned forward, bumping Liam’s forehead. With his eyes closed, he whispered, resigned, “Why do you have to look at me like that… fuck me…”
“I can do that too if you want.” He was smirking.
Jordan’s blush was quick to rise up his neck but didn't stop the laughter from coming up too.
—
“So now I have the kitchen table and chairs.” He pointed to his seat. “A bed and a half decent dresser.” He took a bite of his Pop-Tart. “Still no couch, though.”
Jordan shrugged. “At least the TV works, just have to get cable.” He also had a half eaten Pop-Tart in his hands.
Liam nodded a bit absentmindedly.
“Maybe after I’m all settled I’ll get a cat. They deal okay with smaller spaces, right?”
Jordan nodded. “Better than dogs at least. And you don’t have to take them out for walks.”
“I always feel like the meanest looking cats are the sweetest ones.” He chuckled lightly to himself. “Kind of like you, I guess."
Jordan shook his head dismissively, but the smile on his face betrayed him.
There was a sudden shout, a yelp and other loud noises from outside. He frowned, confused, turning to face Jordan. Liam stood up, curious, and walked to his front facing window. He heard Jordan’s steps following.
Opening the blinds in his bedroom Liam made space for both of them to look outside.
There was a group of college students clad in purple jerseys. All of them clearly shitfaced, some still had beers in their hands, stumbling on the asphalt. They talked loudly, full of excitement, arms around each other’s shoulders. They were clearly a tight pack of friends. Their laughter was loud and contagious, they were clearly overjoyed.
Liam turned to Jordan next to him. “It seems like the Mammoths won the East Coast Conference.”
Jordan offered him a soft smile.
Liam smiled in return, but while he watched the rowdy bunch’s backs, it turned wistful in his lips.
“That’s… I’ve never had that, a group of friends that would invite me to places. Who saw me and included me in their plans without me having to insist. It was like being invisible, all throughout high school.”
Still staring outside, despite students being gone, he continued, “I love having you and Dylan around. But sometimes I still feel like I’m intruding on you guys’ friendship you know…”
Liam blinked a few times and inhaled deeply. His smile widened and he turned back to Jordan who was still standing next to him. He had a slight frown on his face and Liam regretted ever opening his mouth.
“Oh—um…” He should say something—anything—to break the oppressive silence around them. “I—”
“You’ve never been invisible,”Jordan said quietly, meeting Liam’s eyes. “Not to me.”
He said it so sincerely, Liam forgot how to breathe.
Suddenly, he had an armful of the man, both hands cradling his neck. Jordan was kissing him, just like Liam wanted him to. He had wanted Jordan to stop holding back and he wasn't.
Liam wrapped both arms around Jordan’s torso, fingers clutching at the dark fabric of his shirt. Liam decided to take the lead and grabbed the hem of Jordan’s shirt, yanking it upwards until the man understood his intentions. Separating for only a moment both articles were discarded somewhere and their hands were back on each other.
He reveled on the feel of Jordan’s warm chest. The other man held him by his waist mapping the lines of his stomach. Their kiss became more heated. However, when Liam reached for Jordan’s waistband he felt the man tense. He pulled away for a moment.
He purposefully tried to catch Jordan's eyes. Both of their chests panting between them. He attempted to say soothingly, “It’s okay, we don't have to,”
Jordan inhaled and closed his eyes. “I don’t want to fuck this up too…” When he opened them Liam was looking at him confidently.
“You won’t. Trust me.”
They shared a tender kiss as Jordan reached for the button of Liam’s jeans.
In a moment, Liam was standing in front of him in only his boxers. His hardness evident underneath the fabric. Jordan could only pant for a second, temple touching Liam’s. The younger man waited while Jordan let the tension leave his body, both hands caressing the other man’s arms.
When Jordan started kissing his neck, though, he couldn’t stop a hum from escaping his throat. When he lightly bit his shoulder he didn’t even try suppressing the sound. He pulled Jordan close, their chests crushed together.
As Jordan’s hand’s lifted to wrap around his back, Liam’s moved lower to undo the other man’s jeans. Without his own pants on, he could clearly feel Jordan’s hardness against him. He moved faster.
As soon as the pants fell, both men pressed themselves together. The feeling caused them both to moan simultaneously.
“Fuck...” he heard Jordan whisper.
Liam hummed in response.
Jordan bent down and put his hands under Liam’s thighs, hoisting him up. Liam wrapped his legs around Jordan’s waist and they pressed their hips together one more time. What surprised Liam was how arousing it was to see Jordan using his strength. He was not a light man by any means, yet Jordan carried him effortlessly.
Holding on to Jordan’s shoulders he felt himself being gently laid on the mattress. With his back on the soft covers he watched as Jordan moved over him. Jordan pulled back enough to look at him.
The man traced his hand over Liam’s body, slowly and deliberately, mapping out his movements. Liam’s throat was tight, however. He was trying his best to remain quiet, afraid that Jordan would stop with his breathtaking touches.
He was defeated when Jordan grip tightened around his ass. A distinctive moan broke out of him and he involuntarily thrusted his hips upward.
Jordan seemed to notice Liam’s breathlessness as he watched his face. Fingers wrapped around the fabric of Liam’s black underwear and stopped. His eyes searched Liam’s.
“Is this alright?”
Liam nodded firmly. “Yes.”
When Jordan pulled on the fabric, Liam could feel it sticking to his backside from the slick gathered there. His face flushed.
Jordan brushed his fingers up his cleft and Liam shuddered.
“God, you’re so wet...” Jordan whispered reverently.
Liam moaned, pulling an arm up to hide his face, “Fuck, man, you can’t just say shit like that.”
He heard Jordan’s chuckle close to his ear as he leaned forward to kiss his neck.
As Jordan was busy attending to Liam’s neck, Liam’s hand moved over Jordan’s back, beneath his underwear. Jordan paused what he was doing to glance knowingly at Liam.
“What? Did you think we were gonna do this with your boxers on?” asked Liam, teasing.
Jordan’s smile widened and he placed a slow kiss to Liam’s lips.
After a moment Jordan moved up to kneel between Liam’s thighs, a smirk on his lips.
Liam could only stare at Jordan for a moment. The golden light from the streetlamps outlined him perfectly. His intense gaze still locked on Liam’s.
“Fuck, how can you be so perfect…” He hadn’t meant to, but he seemed to have voiced his thoughts aloud as he noticed his partner averting his eyes with a bashful blush to his cheeks.
Liam thought about Jordan’s reaction and how he’d make sure to drown him with sincere compliments whenever he could.
Promptly, all thought vanished from his mind as he watched Jordan dip his thumbs under his boxers.
Liam had to inhale deeply. He was fucked, so utterly fucked. Naked Jordan was so much worse than half-naked Jordan. He felt his dick twitch and it hadn’t even been touched.
When Jordan leaned back down he made it a point to rut their hips together.
“Oh, God…” Liam whispered while Jordan grunted in his ear.
Liam almost complained when the man moved away, until he felt fingers tracing his entrance.
“You better not tease me…” There was barely any oxygen left in his chest.
Jordan smirked but acquiesced, slipping a finger inside him. He couldn’t help but gasp, angling his hips. The movement of a single digit was maddeningly not enough.
When he felt the second he tried pushing his hips against Jordan’s hand. He was panting at this point. He wanted more.
“You’re so beautiful like this.” Jordan’s eyes on him were so intent. And while his fingers kept moving those eyes almost made Liam burst between them.
For his own sanity, Liam placed both hands to Jordan’s face
He was panting heavily but still tried, “You’re seriously trying to make me finish before—Ah—”
The embarrassing tremble in his voice was worth it just for Jordan’s smile.
Liam’s hands moved to Jordan’s back and immediately drew pink lines as a third finger entered him. The man let out a deep groan and thrust his hips against Liam’s thigh.
Jordan initiated a breathtaking kiss, his soft lips tasted perfect against Liam’s tongue. Suddenly Jordan broke contact and just stared at Liam, dark eyes half-lidded.
“I need to taste you.”
Liam’s dick twitched and there was a pink tint climbing his chest and neck but an immediate breathy “Yes!” left his lips.
In a blink Jordan had shifted so his shoulders were placed between Liam’s thighs. Liam felt a bit self conscious and very aroused simultaneously. After slowly pulling out his fingers Jordan laid a long lick across Liam’s hole.
Liam couldn’t help the shiver that went down his spine. As Jordan continued pressing his tongue over the sensitive skin Liam felt like he was being devoured. Like Jordan couldn’t have enough of him. He didn’t even mind the moans coming out of him at that point.
Jordan dragged his tongue firmly against Liam before pushing in. One of Liam’s hands left the navy sheets to tangle in Jordan’s hair.
“Ah—!”
Liam started to squirm in pleasure but Jordan’s strong hands came up to hold his hips firmly. Once he deemed himself satisfied, Jordan came up to kiss Liam’s inner thigh leisurely.
As he shifted upwards he dragged his tongue across the length of Liam’s shaft almost causing the man to choke. Still moving as if he hadn’t done anything, Jordan placed soft bites on Liam’s shoulder.
Liam managed to minutely recover from his intense panting just to say, “You fucking bastard.”
Jordan smiled and they shared an unhurried kiss.
Somewhat looking for payback, Liam gathered his courage and lifted his hand to circle Jordan’s thick member.
“Fuck!” Jordan let out into Liam’s mouth, his jaw was tense, eyes tightly shut at the feeling of Liam stroking him.
When Jordan’s hips started to move, Liam tightened his hand around his deflated knot as he whispered against his lips.
“I want you in me.”
Jordan’s hips dragged against Liam’s, suddenly letting out a choked sound from his throat.
“You can’t just say shit like that…” Jordan murmured, repeating Liam’s earlier words. Both of them chuckled.
Liam brought his hand down until Jordan’s tip was rubbing against his entrance and both men gazed at each other as time seemed to stand still.
“If you want me to stop… will you tell me?”
Jordan’s eyes showed sincerity and worry, and Liam rushed to quiet his anxiety.
“Yes, always.” Liam offered his partner a soft smile.
Their kiss started tender but quickly shifted when Jordan pressed slowly forward into Liam’s entrance.
He gasped when he felt Jordan’s length and size pressing against his walls. When Jordan’s hips came to touch the back of his thighs his mouth was hanging open, visibly panting.
“You okay?” The question came out tight from Jordan’s lips.
“You feel so…”
Liam pressed his heels down on Jordan’s hips. Both of them groaned at the increased pressure.
“Shit—Jordan, please…”
Jordan’s hips started moving tentatively but quickly increased their pace, landing a kiss against Liam’s temple.
Heat curled low in his stomach, almost overwhelming. Every movement pulled another shiver out of him.
He had his fingers tangled in Jordan's black hair when the man shifted and hit a sensitive spot inside him.
“Ah! Ah—Jordan!”
His fingers tightened painfully in Jordan’s hair. Despite hissing through his teeth at the pain, Jordan’s hips stuttered. Seeming to understand, he kept aiming at the same spot, driving Liam mad.
“Mine…” Jordan seemed to whisper to himself.
Liam couldn’t help but clench as he heard it.
“So tight, Liam, fuck—” Jordan said into Liam’s neck.
“Jordan, I’m—” Liam tried to relay, breathless.
Jordan’s knot started to catch on Liam’s rim sending sparks of pleasure to his navel.
“Can I—I want to—” Jordan tried to say.
“Yes! God, yes!” Liam replied enthusiastically.
A few thrusts later and Liam was cumming, a hoarse sound escaping him. As he clenched down in pleasure Jordan pressed himself deep as his knot fully expanded, locking them both together.
After taking a moment to reclaim his breath, Liam opened his eyes to look at Jordan. His dark eyes were closed, he seemed to still be processing the aftershocks of his release.
When he opened his eyes and focused on Liam he immediately asked, “Are you alright?”
Liam couldn’t help but smile. “Definitely.”
He took a breath and clenched down a bit. Both of them groaned. Liam lifted a hand to Jordan’s cheek, wrapping it around his neck.
“Do you have any idea how good you feel?” He watched as Jordan’s cheeks blushed deeply and his smile widened bashfully. He pulled Jordan’s neck down and they met in a kiss.
—
“This game is bullshit!”
“Lost your souls again?” Liam asked his brother who sat sprawled in front of the couch.
“You shut the fuck up, Liam!” Dylan shouted as his brother entered the living room, a glass of water in his hand.
“Don’t back away from him, staying mid-range is death. And watch for the delayed swing,” advised Jordan from his seat on the end of the couch, arm stretched over the back cushions.
Dylan grumbled something under his breath, obviously frustrated. After resting at the bonfire to replenish his Estus Flasks, he went searching for the Nameless King again.
Liam chuckled while he sat back, taking a drink of his water and relaxing. Watching his brother get absolutely destroyed in videogames was definitely not the worst way to spend an afternoon.
So much had happened in the last few months. There was a point he thought he’d never feel this content again. After such turmoil and suffering for all three of them he was glad that things had gone back to how they were before.
He felt fingers playing with the short hairs of his nape and a shiver spread down his neck. When he turned to look at Jordan, the man still had his attention focused on the TV. Though his fingers hadn’t stopped caressing Liam’s neck.
Liam felt his heart grow warm as his feelings for the man bubbled to the surface. He was probably smiling like an idiot when Jordan turned to face him. He felt like he’d been caught staring and his cheeks flushed slightly. Jordan obviously noticed and smiled fondly at him.
Jordan’s attention shifted back to the game after a moment. Though his hand stayed close to Liam's neck, still playing with his hair.
It seemed not everything was back to how it was before. But that was a good thing.
“This game fucking sucks!”
The End