1 - 20 of 89 Bookmarks by Northern_Cryptid
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Stede's new island life is shaping up slowly but surely... and then he finds something strange in the water.
A selkie AU (...sort of)!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 21,881
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 114
- Kudos:
- 136
- Bookmarks:
- 27
- Hits:
- 1,366
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
15 Jan 2026
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Ed and Stede meet at Costco and it's like BAM
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
28 Nov 2025
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As a woman, Ed had always known what was expected of him. As a man, he can finally make his own choices.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,921
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 10
- Kudos:
- 44
- Bookmarks:
- 2
- Hits:
- 215
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
13 Nov 2025
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The man—Stede, Ed did hear Frenchie right, because his name tag says it right next to a sparkly ladybug sticker—gives Ed a little wave, just his fingers, even though Ed’s right there and they’re already talking. Cute. Ed mirrors it. “I’m an apprentice. Jim’s teaching me. I know I’m older than them but, well, you could say it’s kind of a new passion? They’ve just recently set me loose without supervision.”
That checks out. The guy doesn’t have many piercings, just a large hoop in one of his earlobes and a tiny stud shaped like a flower in his nose. No tattoos that Ed can see, either. Not that any of that is required to be a piercer, but it’s pretty strange to see an employee at a place like this who hasn’t already used a good portion of his body as a canvas. Stede’s skin, in comparison, is blank. Untouched.
Not that Ed is going to be weird about that or anything.
Ed meets a guy who's probably the love of his life when he's getting a new piercing, and then he somehow manages to fuck it all up. Or does he?
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
08 Sep 2025
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Ed Teach had made a name for himself, that was for certain; a celebrity ad man among a sea of gray suits. And that was why the suggestion to bring him in was absolutely absurd.
“He’d never work here. He’s too good, plus he doesn’t tie himself down.”
“There’s that can-do spirit I’ve always heard about!” Lucius jokes.
“We could at least try,” Jim presses.
There’s no way. “It’s not even what he does,” Stede tries to remind them, but he can already tell which way the tide is turning.
***
It's 1964, and Stede Bonnet runs a small but mighty ad firm in New York City. When their creative director suddenly quits, his agency reaches out to an unconventional replacement.
--or--
A Mad Men-inspired AU
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
05 Aug 2025
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Whatever Happened to Blackbeard? by PerpendicularPotato
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
25 Jun 2025
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Summary
Edward blinked at the piece of paper in his hands.
It was one of his old wanted posters. The one with the big nose and the crazy eyes and the writing on the back.
They had all had crazy eyes though, hadn’t they?
This specific one however had been re-titled in bright red paint ‘The Gentleman Pirate’s Bitch’. And underneath—presumably in thoughtful consideration for the wide-spread illiteracy amongst pirates—there was a crude drawing (in both senses of the word) helpfully illustrating that very statement.
It's been a few years—post-piracy, post-myth, post-Blackbeard—and despite all odds, Edward has done the work and found peace.
But the world never got to witness the legend’s grand downfall, so now they just won't stop poking the corpse and drawing dicks on its face.
And for some reason, this time... Edward just can’t look away.
The celebration of a life post-public gaze, the reclamation of narrative and the most meta revenge-hatefuck fantasy imaginable—staged by two soft fucking lunatics in love.
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
06 Jul 2025
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“This luck is a gift,” she told him once, right in front of her fireplace as she sewed up the hole in grandpa’s pants that just kept ripping. “This luck brought me here, and it brought me your momma. And, it brought me you.”
“But what is it?” he’d asked in turn.
“It’s a feeling. You know it in your heart, and your heart finds what it’s looking for.” She kissed his temple. “What you are looking for.”
---
Twenty-two-year-old Edward Teach treks through miles of snow in search of a village for food, but the pull in his chest guides him somewhere else entirely: a tower in the woods.
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
14 Jun 2025
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Stede has spent his whole life empty. Ed fills him so well.
Though, he never quite expected it to be so literal.
***
Stede's first time bottoming. (Bottom Stede Week 2025. Cross posting from Bluesky.)
Series
- Part 2 of Widogast's Sexy Innkeeper Era Fics
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
31 May 2025
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Stede has always been unconventional.
Weird, odd, a bit of a risk taker, a man of unusual tastes.
So it doesn’t surprise him, and it shouldn’t surprise anyone else, when he encounters an otherworldly creature splashing into his life, and rather than doing the sensible thing and fleeing, he moves closer, reaches out with both hands, and touches.Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
31 May 2025
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It was one of those little thoughts that popped into Ed's head unprompted every now and then. Like "What if I accidentally stabbed myself cutting this apple?" or "What if that pretty-looking cargo ship's bait in a trap?"
"What if I got bitched?"
It could happen. What even if Ed turned super easily and was begging for more and more in record time, his body betraying him faster than anyone had thought an alpha could be bitched? What if someone did that to him? Wouldn't that just be, like, the worst?
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
25 Apr 2025
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The best nights start with minimal expectations and an open mind.
or: Lucius has a stellar time at the gay bathhouse’s TM4M night.
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
13 Mar 2025
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Inquisitive Minds by PolitestMenace (GayPirateAficionado)
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
02 Mar 2025
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Academic librarian Ed is grumpy about having to cover the media desk for a student. Might be his lucky day, though. Who knows.
Cross-posting from Bluesky.
Series
- Part 1 of Thirsting for Knowledge
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
06 Mar 2025
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No Returns, No Exchanges by ClaireGregory, Deanbird, fake_geek_boy, ghostalservice, petrichorca
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
09 May 2024
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Summary
Stede visits an adult toy shop and finds himself wanting to impress the handsome owner of the store, by asking for bigger and bigger dildos. Little does Stede know that the owner has been cursed, or that he is about to get the surprise of his life when he goes home with the most intimidating dildo in the shop.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,648
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 87
- Kudos:
- 489
- Bookmarks:
- 77
- Hits:
- 3,471
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
27 Jan 2025
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Summary
Ed has a list of ways he thinks he’s likely to die. In battle is the lame but obvious first choice, jealous lover is number six, and way, way, way down at number one hundred and eighty five is “fucked to death by a snake monster.”
It is, however, number sixty two on his “sexual experiences I’d like to have before I die” list, so he thinks it’ll probably even out.
Series
- Part 2 of Smutty Gentlebeard not-quite-one shots
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 29,450
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 253
- Kudos:
- 542
- Bookmarks:
- 118
- Hits:
- 7,088
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
26 Jan 2025
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Summary
Stede Bonnet takes his daughter to Coachella for a meet and greet with her favorite boyband. He flirts with a young, mysterious stranger, only to find out that he is a member of that very same boyband. Stede is much too old and boring to date as massive of a celebrity as Edward Teach.
Isn't he?
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
25 Jan 2025
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Summary
So there Ed is, in this enormous room all decked out in ivory and gold, surrounded by one-percenters and inherited wealth and fucking caviar. And he sits under a canopy of twinkling crystals, and he plays his mood music, and the room slowly fills.
And the bride and groom are nowhere to be seen.
Ed’s starting to feel more and more like a member of the string quartet playing out the sinking of the fucking Titanic.
(Or: Ed's the harpist at a swanky wedding that's gone south. Stede's got his own problems. A one-night fastburn meet-cute: fluff, humour, eventual smut, and a truly obscene description of caviar)
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
23 Jan 2025
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Even in the Dark, I'm Glowing by petrichorca, ThatJadeykinns, veeagainst
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
18 Oct 2024
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Summary
Edward Teach needs a break from his lonely, high-pressure life, so he moves into a lighthouse overlooking Lake Calypso, where tourists flock in hopes of spotting its famous but elusive cryptid. What he doesn't know is that there is a real creature in the lake, just as touch-starved - and kinky - as he is.
Stede finds the long-haired human fascinating, and beautiful. He just doesn't know how to bridge the distance between them. But when a chance meeting brings them together, the sparks are instant.
Written for 2024 OFMD Kinktober, day 18 - a smutty monsterfucking collaboration from Vee, Pez, and Jadeykinns!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 20,294
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 360
- Kudos:
- 207
- Bookmarks:
- 42
- Hits:
- 2,959
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
19 Jan 2025
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Summary
“The fuck was that?"
“How should I know?" Stede laughed mirthlessly, a bit hysterically even. "Octopus arms are high fashion; no one is doing it yet. I’m a trendsetter.”
Ed smiled at the gallows humor and reached out a hand to Stede, which he took with a grateful squeeze. “Hey, you wanna do something weird?”
The arms undulated nigh imperceptibly. "I think we’re well past that, dear."
---
A social blunder results in Stede being cursed to grow tentacles, and Ed is fascinated.Pirate jokes, science experiments, and a very accommodating bathtub, ahoy! Fluff, smut, maybe a touch of crack, and some crack-touching, too.
The story answers the question: "What if a body that changes is fine, actually?"
Series
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
12 Jan 2025
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Summary
It's been a full year since Stede as bitten and Changed, but it's a year that he's had to come to terms with the wolf within himself. Ed has made things easier and Stede finds that he doesn't regret losing his humanity when he's gained a pack and family to call his own. A pack and family that, sadly, rarely give himself and Ed time on their own. After all, how can you have wild passionate sex with your boyfriend when you're surrounded with people that have preternatural hearing?
Stede and Ed decide to take their first vacation to work on Stede's new instincts by renting a cabin in the heart of a sprawling wilderness and searching for the illusive Missouri Monster AKA the Momo. A full moon with just the two of them, no pack, no interruptions, no clothes.
Until, that is, fate has other ideas when Mary, Doug and the kids want a chance to finally get to know Ed and bond as a family. Can Stede and Ed hide what they are from their family? Does the Momo really exist? And how does one go monster hunting with two children that don't realize that there really are monsters in the dark?
Series
- Part 4 of Our Flag Means Supernatural
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
23 Dec 2024
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Scents and Sensibility: The Working Assassin's Guide to Supersoldier Seduction by galwednesday, silentwalrus, skellerbvvt
Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
31 Oct 2018
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Summary
Captain America wakes up from the ice in 2013. The Winter Soldier wakes up in 2009, or rather defects from HYDRA, for a value of defect that’s closer to decimate. He ends up working for SHIELD. In April 2014, he’s assigned to Captain America’s mission as a sniper.
Steve’s just trying to get some kind of life together. Bucky is too, or at least he was until tall, blond and Captain shows up and starts just - being there, all the time. It’s terrible. It’s the worst. He has to do something about it.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 93,218
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 1,924
- Kudos:
- 8,822
- Bookmarks:
- 3,395
- Hits:
- 186,854
Bookmarked by Northern_Cryptid
27 Nov 2024