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i know several lives worth living by neinofthem (jeyneofpoole)
Fandoms: Critical Role (Web Series)
16 Feb 2025
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Summary
Beau begins by sighing exasperatedly, which is typically not ideal for selling a pitch, but what the fuck, right? “I wanted to ask you,” she says, carefully now, “If you would maybe be interested in working with the Cobalt Soul. In a more, uh, official capacity. Like with a salary and everything, or whatever.”
There is a silence which is somehow worse than the silence that they were sitting in before. Essek makes a small sound that must be unconscious, sort of like a death rattle. Beau didn’t know such an undignified noise was in his repertoire.
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
12 Apr 2026
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Dann geht die Einsamkeit mit den Flüssen by randomhorse
Fandoms: Tatort, Babylon Berlin (TV)
22 Jan 2022
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Summary
Babylon Berlin AU. Leo Hölzer wird aus Saarbrücken nach Berlin versetzt. Es ist April 1929. Im hungernden, hurenden Wedding soll er ein einschlägiges Etablissement ausheben. Und er hätte wirklich alles erwartet, aber nicht, dass ihm dabei ein Gesicht begegnet, das er seit fünfzehn Jahren nicht gesehen hat.
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
18 Mar 2026
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Caleb is back in the tower, eager to prove himself worthy of the vulnerability revealed to him. Essek reacts unexpectedly, once again.
Series
- Part 2 of what echoes in the hollows
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
16 Mar 2026
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my shadow is heavy (it follows me everywhere i go) by vagabondfirelily
Fandoms: Critical Role (Web Series)
18 Feb 2023
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Summary
Caleb looks at him then, despite all of Essek’s frazzled glory – an oversized sweater slipping off one shoulder, one ear torn, mismatched earrings on the other, ink-stained fingertips – and says:
“You are magnificent.”
Essek’s breath catches somewhere between his lungs and his throat, his treacherous heart bruising against the confines of his ribcage. He knows it can’t possibly be true. He’s just Essek, still the same selfish creature. The same lying man with blood on his hands and a tally of crimes to his name. He’s barely anything at all.
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
16 Mar 2026
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When the Mighty Nein parted ways, they left an important enemy alive, so he might stand trial.
The road to conviction is a long one, fraught with pain, judgment, and the terrifying reality of trying to convince the world to take the word of an assassin-turned-mercenary over one of its most prolific propagandists.
All rise for the trial of Trent Ikithon, former Archmage of Civil Influence.
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
06 Mar 2026
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let's pick the truth we believe in by burningdarkfire
Fandoms: Critical Role (Web Series)
04 Jul 2021
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Summary
It is easily one of the top five most awkward dinners Caleb has ever attended. Everyone realizes very quickly that having the Empire’s Archmage of Civil Influence and the Dynasty’s Shadowhand at the same table means that not overstepping any lines is of crucial importance, and thus the conversation takes a rapid turn for the hilariously banal.
Astrid kills Trent while the Nein are in Aeor. Caleb returns to Rexxentrum to make some peace with his past and make some sense of his future.
There is never a simple way to stop loving someone.
Series
- Part 1 of doom days (i watch the world burn)
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
05 Mar 2026
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Summary
"It’s a beautiful day at the Soltryce Academy—the sky is vibrant and the trees rustle with the gentlest of winds as Caleb begins his impromptu Transmutation lecture outside. From the building on the edge of the grounds he hears a muffled bell tolling for fifth period. Somewhere in the distance, a student begins to whistle.
At that moment, Caleb feels at peace.
At that moment, a Purple Worm bursts forth from the soil directly in front of him, and all of his plans for a pleasant afternoon are promptly dashed."
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Caleb and Essek have finally settled down - more or less. While the beloved and somewhat eccentric Professor Widogast is busy inciting small student-scale riots and teaching tiny wizards morals, Essek spends his days lounging around the house, drinking wine and experimenting with the exotic concept of 'cooking his own meals'. They are pretty sure life is great - until two pre-teen assassins crash-land into the middle of the Soltryce Academy and demand the former Shadowhand be surrendered to their custody. What are the two internationally in/famous mages to do? The answer will shock absolutely no one.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 115,412
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Comments:
- 717
- Kudos:
- 1,876
- Bookmarks:
- 537
- Hits:
- 35,071
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
19 Feb 2026
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Summary
Beauregard teaches Essek some hand-to-hand combat. Essek has feelings about it (so does Caleb, who watches).
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
08 Jan 2026
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Summary
There's something in Caleb's dreams. It wants him to know that he's not alone. It wants him to know that he'll never be alone again.
Elves don't dream, so all Essek can do is watch.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 215,726
- Chapters:
- 23/23
- Comments:
- 2,333
- Kudos:
- 3,242
- Bookmarks:
- 857
- Hits:
- 96,876
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
04 Jan 2026
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Summary
Rexxentrum and Rosohna found something they could agree on: war criminals can still be useful.
(A bleak post-canon timeline; things get colder before we find our warmth.)
Series
- Part 1 of Ashkeeper
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
01 Jan 2026
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It used to be if you don't like it you could leave by thought
Fandoms: Critical Role (Web Series)
19 Oct 2021
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Summary
In which the humans do a politics, the Xhorhasians learn about potato's, and everyone decides five hundred years of living in disguise and on the run isn't actually a great life plan, Essek.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,252
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 101
- Kudos:
- 1,178
- Bookmarks:
- 387
- Hits:
- 13,175
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
26 Dec 2025
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Summary
relativity, noun. 1) In physics: the degree to which a phenomenon’s perception differs between observers based on their independent reference frames; 2) In philosophy: the belief that there is no absolute morality existing beyond the conditioning of the individual.
The return to Aeor is a crucible of sorts- all that they have this time is each other, which is both electrifying and terrible in near-equal quantities. Two wizards in one place is trouble, but when they're Caleb and Essek it's a match to acetylene.
(Or: how it falls apart and comes back together.)
Series
- Part 1 of cascading phenomena
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 30,812
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 160
- Kudos:
- 773
- Bookmarks:
- 191
- Hits:
- 11,825
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
23 Dec 2025
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the risk i took was calculated, but man am i bad at math by the_littlest_goblin
Fandoms: Critical Role (Web Series)
08 Sep 2019
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Summary
“The Bright Queen will not allow Essek to teach me any more dunamancy. And I cannot talk him into disobeying her. So, I am taking a different approach. Hopefully a more… effective one.”
“You mean you're sleeping with him in exchange for magic lessons?”
Caleb winced at Beau's bluntness. "Not exactly."
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Caleb has a plan. Caleb has done this before. Caleb knows what he's doing.
(Caleb doesn't know anything, especially about his own feelings.)
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
20 Dec 2025
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Fundamental Forces Other Than Gravity by mllekurtz (TheKnittingJedi)
Fandoms: Critical Role (Web Series)
09 Jan 2021
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Summary
Essek's tone is academic, clinical, cold. “It would be pointless to deny that I am attracted to you. And I wouldn’t object if what happened last night would happen again. But I would be grateful if we could keep it between us.”
There’s a beat, then Caleb nods. “I’m fine with keeping it quiet and casual.”
Or how cold, ruthless and lonely Essek Thelyss (a brilliant student with a secret) accidentally makes some friends and falls in love: a Shadowgast college AU.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 40,676
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 175
- Kudos:
- 1,655
- Bookmarks:
- 369
- Hits:
- 18,952
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
19 Dec 2025
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Summary
“My lord, for all your love for Iskander, will you not save him?”
Bagoas had served Alexander for many years, and had come to witness and accept the relationship between the king and his favourite. But it was not until the end, when he gazed upon those eyes of the night for the last time, that he truly understood the love between the Alexander and Hephaistion.
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
16 Dec 2025
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National Service by burntcopper
Fandom Chronicles of Narnia (Movies), Chronicles of Narnia - C. S. Lewis, Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Torchwood
18 May 2015
- Words:
- 63,541
- Works:
- 7
- Bookmarks:
- 2,833
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
16 Dec 2025
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a call rattling in her bones by dirgewithoutmusic
Fandoms: Chronicles of Narnia - All Media Types, Chronicles of Narnia - C. S. Lewis
19 Mar 2014
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Summary
"You’ve all grown so much," their mother says.
Edmund is too young to register, but older now than he was at his first war; Lucy, who had been so young when they had left, grew into herself in a world filled with magic. All of them, they have responsibility pressed into their shoulders, old ropes they can’t even grasp for. No one is asking them to take that mantle on their shoulders, and that’s the hardest part. You get used to the weight. You build your world around it, build your identity into the crooks and crannies of the load you carry.
Susan has forgotten about being a child. She is the blessed, the chosen, the promised. Susan has decades on her classmates, wars, loss and betrayal, victory and growing fields, the trust of her subjects. It was a visceral thing, to have all those lives under her protection and to know that her subjects slept safe, peacefully, on dark nights.
Here, on this drab concrete, her people are untouchable, indefensible; her self is vanished, her kingdom gone; she can feel the loss like a wound. She has lost her power, but that trust, that responsibility remains. It circles her ankles, trips her in the school hallways.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,145
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 114
- Kudos:
- 3,523
- Bookmarks:
- 406
- Hits:
- 34,003
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
16 Dec 2025
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Summary
Mephistopheles loves him. And it is a cruel love he feels. Because Faust is his - his in life, and his in death.
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
16 Dec 2025
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the undiscovered country by indigostohelit
Fandoms: Hamlet - Shakespeare, SHAKESPEARE William - Works
01 May 2014
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Summary
It's 1959, and the mayor of Chicago is dead.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 57,033
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 71
- Kudos:
- 545
- Bookmarks:
- 282
- Hits:
- 17,656
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
16 Dec 2025
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Summary
Leo und Adam und was die Nachbarn so denken.
- Language:
- Deutsch
- Words:
- 7,136
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 51
- Kudos:
- 370
- Bookmarks:
- 36
- Hits:
- 1,702
Bookmarked by ThatLieutenant
16 Dec 2025