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Summary
In interropunct's immortal words: "Jaskier gets bitten by a rabid animal. Then poisoned. Then injected with strange and horrifying concoctions. No one is happy about any of this."
And then, afterwards, things start looking up.
- Words:
- 77,021
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 43
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Candy-Coated Buttercups by Chlorokin for toapoet
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
07 Mar 2026
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Summary
Jaskier is a sugar baby, and unless someone is dumb enough to catch real feelings, it’s always been the unspoken truth that his affections are only ever leased, never fully owned.
And the lease is expensive.
When his current sugar daddy, Radovid, falls short, Jaskier finds himself approached by a handsome white-haired stranger who knows how to say all the right things.
Will Geralt be everything Jaskier needs in a sugar daddy?
Or will he be so much more?
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Rumours of the Witchers' Bard by Chrissy22
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
21 Mar 2026
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Summary
Over the years, Jaskier gets a reputation amongst witchers as the guy who will get you out of bind if you need him to. He’s the witchers’ bard, after all. Need a hand with your injuries? A safe place to hide? A friendly face? Find Jaskier.
Jaskier, on the other hand, has no idea why witchers in trouble keep bumping into him on the road, but fate is funny that way, isn’t it? He’s certainly not going to turn them away
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Summary
In a cruel turn of events, Soap is abandoned by his favorite diver, Ghost. Left to rot in his tank, all alone! Never to see the man again!
The weeks trudge on, and he loses all hope that he'll ever be happy again. The mer falls into a deep depression, only coming out of his cave on rare occasion.
He decides he'll waste away as revenge...
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Simon goes on a four week trip to help his old captain with his diving company. It's a nice change of pace, but his thoughts keep wandering back to the mer he had to leave behind.
The weeks pass, mostly uneventful, until he receives a text that chills him.
Series
- Part 2 of Not Even the Depths
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Summary
The Leshy had been the final fucking straw.
For decades, Eskel had found himself increasingly sick of walking the Path and living the life of monsters and money.
He had spent most of his life being hated for something he had no choice in: becoming a mutant.
It was thankless work, people didn’t want to pay even when he’d bested their monster, and everyone was afraid of him.
But winter came yet again as Eskel made his way up to Kaer Morhen, badly injured by a fucking Leshy, of all things,
And by the time Eskel was deemed free of the Leshy and able to rest, everyone else in the Keep was wrapped around the fingers of Geralt’s daughter, Ciri.
So when the pass was clear enough for travel in the spring, Eskel had made up his mind: he was done with doing what was expected of him.
Eskel wanted to retire.
In years bygone, Eskel had spent some time in Oxenfurt, sitting in on whatever classes at the University that allowed mutants, and he’d thoroughly enjoyed that pursuit of knowledge, though he could never afford the tuition to attend as a student.
And that is how Eskel found himself sneaking silently into a lecture on music theory given by “Professor Julian Pankratz”.

