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Don't treat me like I have rabies, I only wanna have your babies. by Freakyfreakster
Fandoms: Dispatch (Video Game)
14 Jan 2026
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Robert runs a hand over his face; is he seriously staying late to clean the office? He knows he isn’t the janitor anymore, right? Robert thinks about how Herman had recently lamented his feeling of uselessness, that cleaning the office was the only thing that made him feel truly helpful, and despite Robert’s reassurance that the Z-team would be nothing without him, the boy had insisted on cleaning the office between missions. This was different though, his shift ended hours ago, he shouldn’t be staying this late just to do someone else's job. Remorse runs through Robert as he clicks the alert, he’ll figure out where in the office Herm is, make him clock out, and walk him home with a stern conversation about the importance of putting himself first. His mouse hovers over Waterboy’s bodycam, attempting to view his area.
The view Robert is met with however, makes him pause.
Robert accidentally sees Waterboy during a private moment when he forgets to clock out. He decides to find the boy, helping him live out his perverted Mecha Man related fantasies.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
14 Jan 2026
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It felt like hours that he made Robert wait there, on his knees at the foot of the bed. Bound, blind, and achingly hard. He hadn't managed to hang on to his composure long, after Vahid had walked away, leaving the ghost of warmth in his wake. Robert strained, trying to hear what he was doing, trying to mentally map where he must be from the sound of his soft footsteps.
'By the dresser. Past the dresser. Off the carpet, I can hear his feet on the tile. What's he doing in the kitchen? Is that the game tonight, to make me wait?'
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
13 Jan 2026
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In Chad's bedside drawer Robert finds painkillers, reading glasses, condoms and lube. Which is interesting. They'd never gotten much further than the odd handjob.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
13 Jan 2026
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The weekly, after-work get-together of the Z Team is a great opportunity for boyfriends to be flaunted and secret skills to be revealed. And in Chad's and Herm's case, it also ends in them trying out something new in a hotel room.
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"You— You’re tied to the bed," Herm mumbled, staring down at Chad, as though he expected him to somehow contest that statement.
"Great observation. Next you’re gonna tell me that I’m hot and you’re wet."
"S-So I’m…I can decide today…now— right now. I’m in charge." Chad blinked, beginning to understand what Herm was getting at. His dick clearly seemed to be on board, giving an interested twitch at the thought of temporarily giving up control. "In…uhh…In control, I mean."
(This can be read as a stand-alone)
Series
- Part 10 of Set Fire to the Rain
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
13 Jan 2026
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Herman's powers make him pee often. The bathrooms are usually empty after work. Usually.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
13 Jan 2026
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“This was exciting. Even if it was filling him with dread. He’d been distracted all day, waiting for his shift to end…
… As soon as he leaves the building, he’s fair game.”
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
13 Jan 2026
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The Permanent Quest to Make Sure Robert Eats Enough by Azure_Lynx
Fandoms: Dispatch (Video Game)
12 Jan 2026
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Punch Up is pretty sure Robert thinks he's been asked to join their date night. To be fair, were it anyone besides Robert, they would've figured it out about six dates ago, but their beloved dispatcher still grapples with the concept that people might actually find him attractive and ask him on a date. Granted, that iswhat had happened, kind of, but the main idea was that Robert didn't eat enough and they always went out to a really filling restaurant. So it was actually Punch Up and Coupé attempting to get him back to a healthy weight post-coma. The date was incidental.
It's fine. He figures it out eventually, and they even manage to convince him that, no, really, they do want him there. In return, he decides to take them somewhere extra special.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
13 Jan 2026
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When Flambae takes an unexpected dip in the Ocean the Z team end up finding out about his and Robert's relationship, and they DEMAND details.
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"Yeah the homemade lunches really should have tipped us off" Courtney cringed.
"We didn't start dating till after that"
Series
- Part 1 of Zombie's Post cannon Cannon
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
13 Jan 2026
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Robert’s breath catches.
There, on Chad’s upper right shoulder, is a tattoo of the Mecha Man symbol. It’s not huge, probably only the size of Robert’s palm but the stylized M is unmistakable, neat black lines shifting as Chad takes measured breaths.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
13 Jan 2026
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This was either his best idea yet, or the after effects of his traumatic brain injury from the explosion.
"The thing is," he said, keeping his voice low and cutting off whatever tirade Sonar was in the middle of, "rabies is fucking nasty. And it's in all of your bodily fluids. You might have advanced healing as a super, but not everyone is so lucky... You really can't expect a defenseless normie - like me - to suck you off if you don't keep on top of your vaccinations."
There was dead fucking silence at the end of the line and then a loud crack. He glanced at the monitor to see Sonar's tracker suddenly stutter to a halt downtown.
Robert tried very hard to stop himself from laughing.
"Did you just fly into a building?"
Series
- Part 2 of Head Game
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
12 Jan 2026
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Robert accidentally gets hit with an aphrodisiac combined with demon's blood.
Since he's relatively normal, it affects him the hardest (see; at all).More fool him, he supposes.
Series
- Part 1 of The Z-Team Harem
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 52,328
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Comments:
- 1,389
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- 7,092
- Bookmarks:
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- 131,162
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
12 Jan 2026
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SDN sends the Z-Team to a charity event halfway across the country. Flambae is not only forced to room with Waterboy at the hotel, but share a bed too. Oh, and Waterboy has a bit too much to drink.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
12 Jan 2026
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Robert isn't afraid to say that his favorite part of SDN is Royd's lab.
Well, maybe he's a little afraid. He shudders to think of what the Z-Team would do if he ever admitted out loud that they were anything less than the reason he woke up in the morning. For a team of former super villains, they have surprisingly fragile egos.
But the lab feels like home in a way nowhere else does. The smell of soldering irons and spilled coolant eases the tension from his shoulders, lessens the tightness around his rib cage. It reminds him of the rare cool days in the deepest winters of Torrence, when the air is cool enough to show his breath during a morning run. For just a moment, breathing is a little easier.
~~~
Robert spends his lunch break working on the mech with Royd. He gets a outside opinion of events in his childhood.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
12 Jan 2026
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“Shut up and look at this.” The phone is too close to Chad's face, he has to push Alice's eager hand back just a bit to let his eyes focus on the screen, and then he chokes.
Is that Robert fucking Robertson??
Or,
Chad and Alice find Robert's Grindr account
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
12 Jan 2026
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The Z-Team is being sent on a short-term work trip. The only problem is that the destination is hours away… and the way carpooling ended up having Flambae, Prism, and Waterboy crammed into Robert’s shitty little Honda Civic… and whatever weird combination of flirting, bonding, and bullying each other is going on in the passenger seats. Not to mention Waterboy’s surprising taste in music.
This was going to be a long drive.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
12 Jan 2026
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Phenomaman has a nice night treating himself. Not without a bit of education and some pining first, though.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
11 Jan 2026
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When Robert turns around, chest bare with two perky tits for show, ass clad in his white briefs, Shroud is already waiting there for him. However, reclined in an armchair—one that Robert keeps in his room exclusively for this purpose—and maskless, what pushes itself out of his mouth at the sight is: “Uncle.”
Not blood, no, but something much thicker than water.
A bond.
OR: Robert's very complicated relationship in the bowels of the Red Ring.
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
11 Jan 2026
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Flambae is almost asleep when he feels a pair of hands sliding up his thighs. He snaps his eyes open and looks down — and there’s Robert. His hair is messy, his face hidden in the dark shadows of the room. Flambae has no idea if this is a sleep-deprivation hallucination or alcohol still in his system, but the way Robert touches him feels real. Too real.
After a night of getting dragged into a bar fight at The Sardines and eating tacos from a questionable late-night joint with the Z-Team, Flambae gets home and starts questioning his feelings about Robert… until things heat up.
OR
How Flambae found out that Robert is MechaMan, and how things between them shifted after that into something even more complicated… and way more tense.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,848
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 60
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- 1,155
- Bookmarks:
- 131
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- 15,240
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
11 Jan 2026
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“Okay,” he sighed, “Flambae, just give me a second I’ll get you out.”
“Yeah, whatever, Bob-Bob.” The man pouted and the dispatcher gave a wordless eye roll in response.
He clicked open the tank’s system, eyes flicking over its diagnostics as he tapped in codes to delve deeper into its files. At first, it didn’t register as wrong. It was just a containment protocol that had been initiated. The machine was doing what it was built to do but once he got into the core code, Robert felt his stomach drop.
The ventilation system had been disengaged and the chamber’s water filling cycle was still active. Tts encoded auto-shut off sequence had eroded into nothing but a series of incomplete lines.
Flambae had been completely sealed in.
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I saw this TikTok and I needed to write out the idea okay
Series
- Part 4 of Mechabae
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
10 Jan 2026
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And all Cooper wanted to do -- his favorite thing -- he wanted to say he'd been right and she should have listened.
Except Lucy can't stand on her own two feet, and she's chapped and sunbaked and hardly there at all. Her big, wide eyes are dull and filmed over, her skin's all red and raw and her hands are a sickly white turned red at the wrists. Even as he parted his lips, to boast about how he was always right, he can't get the words out.
What a goddamn disappointment.
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(SPOILERS FOR SEASON 2, EP 4)
Bookmarked by Thelittlemonkey
10 Jan 2026
