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As part of the terms of the probationary contract, DRACO LUCIUS MALFOY shall submit for inspection his WAND on the last day of every month, such inspection to be carried out by a duly registered and fully qualified AUROR in the employ of the MINISTRY OF MAGIC, and such inspection to include a PRIORI INCANTATEM spell to ensure that no PROHIBITED MAGICS as heretofore described have been practised by the aforementioned probationer.
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Summary
Draco Malfoy makes a living gossiping about Harry Potter. Harry makes a hobby out of giving him new material. Soon, it’s hard to tell whether the Chosen One has finally gone off the rails or if the column has taken creative writing a bit too far.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 47,921
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 121
- Kudos:
- 336
- Bookmarks:
- 93
- Hits:
- 7,967
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
04 Nov 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
So funny. Check out the rest by this author
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What Dreams May Come by firethesound_HP_archive for slytherco
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
17 Dec 2020
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Summary
If Harry had to get called into work on his day off, at least he was able to get Malfoy called in too.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,127
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 310
- Kudos:
- 6,278
- Bookmarks:
- 1,613
- Hits:
- 90,122
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
09 Oct 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Creepy but excellent, Harry’s coat is amazing. Watch out for the heartbreaking reference to young Harry trying to keep his clothes folded
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Summary
Everyone keeps telling Harry he needs to relax. So here he is, in Wizarding London's poshest spa, for his first ever massage. He has no idea what to expect, but he's under strict orders to do what he's told and enjoy himself.
*****
Draco has a semi from the moment he first sees Potter, face down on the bed, pert round arse forming the perfect hill to die on. Or in. He defies anyone with all six foot of greased up, absurdly sculpted, practically-naked Potter under their hands to do anything different.
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Against his better judgement, Harry agrees to appear on WENIS – a charity gameshow designed to lead contestants to the deepest desires of their hearts, while also showcasing Wheezes’ new line of adult products.
The aphrodisiac tea quickly gets the better of him.
So does Malfoy.
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Summary
Harry is full of confidence as he enters the French Ministry on a sunny June morning. He's prepared for this meeting. Overprepared, in fact. Ready for any question they can throw at him. Primed for success.
But as it turns out, there’s one thing Harry couldn’t prepare for: his interpreter. The person assigned to whisper in his ear all week; the distractingly sexy bastard with a smirking mouth and clever tongue.
Apparently, Harry's mission this week isn't just to bring the Quidditch World Cup home to England; it's to do it without falling in love with Draco bloody Malfoy.
Or
Harry falls in love in Paris.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 64,619
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 499
- Kudos:
- 2,114
- Bookmarks:
- 644
- Hits:
- 44,042
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
29 Jul 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
I surely know this author (?), great storytelling
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Summary
Irreparably damaged after the war, Harry has a choice to make: drag someone down with him or let the disease run its course.
OR: Harry is dying and Draco doesn't know how to mind his business.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,320
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 133
- Kudos:
- 1,316
- Bookmarks:
- 331
- Hits:
- 15,485
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
21 Jul 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
So well written, check out authors other work
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Summary
It’s Pansy’s fault, really, for inviting Draco’s Quidditch star ex and his new boytoy to her wedding cruise. Desperate times call for desperate measures, and nothing is more desperate than asking the only other wizard in England who can compete in both looks and fame to fake being in love with him for seven days.
The fact that Potter is also his boss, roommate, and occasional friend should make it easier.
So Draco has it handled. Everything is fine.
Draco's an exceptional liar and Potter is…well, admittedly Potter is becoming a problem.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 43,160
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 409
- Kudos:
- 2,461
- Bookmarks:
- 671
- Hits:
- 38,687
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
20 Jul 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Lots of fun. Check out the rest by this author
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Summary
Harry Potter leads a perfectly satisfying life. He’s got friends, a successful career that allows him to travel anywhere, and no shortage of willing partners. Although, over the years, Malfoy has remained the most constant and recently, kind of the only one. But that’s not a bad thing, really, Harry’s learned. Nothing has to change between them…until it does.
Cue an ancient curse, a rushed Handfasting ceremony, and discovering that maybe—just maybe—life begins when you’re forty.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,424
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 122
- Kudos:
- 672
- Bookmarks:
- 160
- Hits:
- 5,622
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
10 Jun 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Beautifully crafted and sweet, so much unsaid but evident. Want to read the rest by this author
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Summary
“Harry, you were half naked and holding fucking hands. I saw you."
Harry grips his mug tighter, resisting the urge to lob it at Ron's head. “Again. There was no room in there; it was a fucking coffin, Ron. And we thought we were going to die.”
Or
Harry gets trapped inside a coffin with Draco Malfoy.
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
28 Apr 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
The premise shouldn’t work but somehow really does? Lovely
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Summary
Everybody knows that Potter can't dance. He's an awkward, shuffling idiot with two left feet. Draco had even witnessed it first hand. And alright, admittedly that was over a decade ago at a stuffy school ball…but it's just an undisputed fact of life, isn't it? That Harry Potter is an insufferable twat with a hero complex, and he can't dance. But Sweet Mother of Merlin, Draco has to resist the urge to rub his eyes and pinch himself, because this Potter? He can fucking move.
Or
When Deputy Head Auror Potter waltzes into Wizarding London's most popular gay nightclub a few months after his highly publicised break up with Girl Weasley, Draco is completely cool about it. Not affected in the least.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,666
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 147
- Kudos:
- 1,807
- Bookmarks:
- 325
- Hits:
- 16,537
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
28 Apr 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Filthy but great, use your phone to listen to the music simultaneously
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Summary
Draco is grieving. His conversation partner is here against their will. It's a shameless rip-off of an insipid Muggle reality dating show. Hardly the occasion for true love, if you ask Draco.
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The Most Splendid Thing by lq_traintracks (lumosed_quill) for katastasis
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
07 Dec 2024
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Summary
Star Quidditch rivals Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter become accidentally bonded. They still hate each other, but now it’s untenable to leave each other’s sides—and my, but it feels oh so good to touch. They’re either going to murder one another, or fall in love.
OR: A story in which Draco finally allows himself happiness, and Harry finally learns that he deserves to be whole.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 61,231
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 667
- Kudos:
- 3,057
- Bookmarks:
- 1,068
- Hits:
- 60,696
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
22 Dec 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
Such good fun and plenty of heart squeezes
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Summary
Draco Malfoy returned to Hogwarts tall and tense and in love with Neville Longbottom.
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A Convenient Impracticality by firethesound_HP_archive for Isinuyasha
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
01 Dec 2015
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Summary
Somehow Harry ends up agreeing to a fake relationship with his ex-nemesis-turned-friendly-acquaintance-with-benefits, except for some reason it involves an awful lot of actual dating and, sadly, not much sex. Confused? Harry is too, but when has anything with Draco Malfoy ever been as straightforward as it seems?
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Draco wakes up in the morning hungover and with someone in his bed. He never could've dreamed it would be Harry Potter.
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The worst possible thing Draco could've done was to tell Harry he wouldn't mind sleeping with him.
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
08 Aug 2024
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Summary
The air crackled as it busied itself shifting around molecules, making way for a hefty slab of magic, and then there it was: the Knight Bus, squeezed neatly into a pocket of Wizarding space among stagnant Muggle buses, vibrant violet amidst a string of cherry red. The door sprang open.
"Draco," said Potter, a little breathless, a little cheerful. He smelled of coconut lotion, Cockroach Clusters and a sloppy ironing charm. Lifting one hand off the steering wheel, Potter gave a small wave. He wore gloves. Fingerless, the leather black against the sunlight. Leather. In August.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,268
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 268
- Kudos:
- 1,184
- Bookmarks:
- 286
- Hits:
- 19,681
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
19 Jul 2024
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Us, infinite (unfortunately) by thecouchsofa for nv-md (ANW815)
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
13 Jul 2024
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Summary
It’s very fitting for how Harry’s life has gone thus far that he gets trapped in a time loop without rhyme, reason, or warning.
To make matters infinitely worse, the one other person stuck on the same hellish chronological ride is Draco Malfoy, git extraordinaire.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 77,287
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 560
- Kudos:
- 2,433
- Bookmarks:
- 832
- Hits:
- 51,897
Bookmarked by Voracious_Reader_Type
16 Jul 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
Totally hilarious and plenty of heart squeeze moments. Maybe a couple of minor inconsistencies (Harry aparated to Dracos door stoop to start with or straight into flat?) but does not detract from overall enjoyment
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Summary
When Blaise gifts Draco a sexual fantasy mirror for his birthday, Draco doesn't think he's actually going to use it.
It seems he didn't take his own ridiculous obsession with Potter into account.