anehan

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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    In which Shane Hollander's pubic hair goes viral, the internet colour-matches it to Pantone 15-1214 (Warm Sand), and Ilya Rozanov - creates accounts on Reddit, TikTok, Instagram, Tumblr, AND YouTube to anonymously defend his not-boyfriend's crotch using genetics Wikipedia and advanced hockey analytics.

    Features: a one-star Calvin Klein review ("very poor elastic, ruined my life"), Svetlana and Rose who have never once been wrong, and the most romantic use of the word "melanocytes" in the history of the English language according to Ilya Rozanov.

    Language:
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    Words:
    11,506
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    474
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    5,662
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    18 Mar 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    They’d agreed on a plan. It was cautious. Designed to keep them safe. Laying the foundation for a future after hockey. It didn’t include Shane going nuclear one fucking day into pre-season, blowing up his entire life on something he should’ve expected to happen if he was being honest with himself.

    Or, when the long game falls apart, Shane and Ilya need a new plan. (Or or, from the ten year plan to the one week speed-run.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    32,183
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    396
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    3,581
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    1,023
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    34,974

    17 Mar 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 27

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    At an All-Star game, the only out and proud player in the MLH approaches Shane with the suggestion to start a charity together. It's the beginning of something life changing.

    ---

    Or: Shane and Ilya never started hooking up. Several years into their career, some things are very different.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,574
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    43
    Kudos:
    211
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    1,353

    17 Mar 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Emmy: When did you first hook up with him?
    Jane: 2010
    Caro: WHAT
    Megan: GIRL
    Tia: SEVEN YEARS??
    Megan: My jaw is borderline unhinged rn

    Or: In 2017, Shane finds a place where he can talk about his sex life...a group chat for girls who have slept with Ilya Rozanov

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,432
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    368
    Kudos:
    3,028
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    436
    Hits:
    12,765

    17 Mar 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    “Is this about the choking thing?” Shane asks. “I only said no to that because I’m not letting you compromise my fucking airway during sex.”

    “But it is not compromising your airway when my dick is in your throat?”

    “No. This is why you lost today, because that’d be my esophagus, not my trachea,” Shane corrects. He’s such an asshole sometimes, Ilya loves it. “Anyways, I don’t think we do anything kinky?”

    Ilya abruptly feels like he’s lost the plot. “Hollander, I am pretty sure we do.”

    shane has a bad call. afterwards, ilya makes sure he gets what he needs.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,606
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    231
    Kudos:
    4,471
    Bookmarks:
    861
    Hits:
    52,148

    15 Mar 2026