qweermonkey
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call it what it is (it’s a sick, sick joke) by nonalovesyou
Fandoms: The Long Walk (Movie 2025)
11 Jan 2026
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Summary
It takes Ray Garraty five days to fall in love.
Which is, objectively, absolutely fucking absurd. He started dating Jan when he was sixteen years old and never fell in love with her. That sounds terrible, but it’s true. Three and a half years together, and he never even considered the possibility of falling in love with her. What a great boyfriend he turned out to be.
But he meets Pete McVries and falls in love in less than a week.
Bookmarked by qweermonkey
18 Feb 2026
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“Come on, baby, once in a while does not hurt. Rookies say that drunk cigarettes don’t count, have you ever heard that? I think is funny,” Ilya tries, his kisses softer now, trying to work Shane into the soft, pliant mess he loves.
It doesn’t work. In fact – “What’s that, Ilya?”
Ilya is biting anywhere he can find, “I don’t have gun license, so I must be happy to see you.”
But that doesn’t work either. Shane finally moves – only to grab at Ilya’s collar, pulling it so that it digs into the back of his neck, which has Ilya pausing as Shane inspects. “That, Ilya. What’s that.”
or, Shane finds some (perfectly explainable) lipstick on Ilya's collar, and they both go through emotional saw traps
- Language:
- English
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- 8,224
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- 1/1
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- 244
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Bookmarked by qweermonkey
17 Feb 2026
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“Holy shit, dude,” Hayden whispers, too loudly, as he pulls Shane away. “No way you were just talking to Ilya Rozanov.”
“Uh, yeah. We just met. Wait, did he lie to me?” Shane asks, looking back over his shoulder where Ilya is now standing next to a short but very muscular woman with long black hair. “What does he play?”
Hayden stops, so Shane does too.
“You don’t know who that was?”
Shane makes a face that says ‘no shit’, and waits for an answer.
“Dude. You are so innocent. Ilya Rozanov, ‘Russia’s Greatest Love Machine’?” Hayden says, like it’s obvious.
Shane looks at him blankly, and then Hayden laughs. Not like, a chuckle. He full on cackles, bending over like he can’t even contain it. “Man, he’s like prolific.”
“At what?” Shane snaps, because he’s getting really sick of not being in on the joke.
“He’s a porn star, man.”
“A-” Shane says, swallowing thickly. “What?”
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Ilya is a porn star, Shane is a hockey player, and their paths cross.
- Language:
- English
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- 21,214
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- 2/2
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- 689
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- 22,598
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Bookmarked by qweermonkey
17 Feb 2026
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Every Boston Raider knows that although their captain has a girl in every port, he’s got a soft spot for the one in Montreal. Dr. Shane Hollander knows it’s better to have a semi-regular source of casual sex than try to make a relationship work during residency. Ilya Rozanov knows that the doctor he’s fucking in Montreal is unaware that he plays hockey, and in fact probably thinks he’s Bratva.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 12,466
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 1,446
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- 23,781
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- 7,162
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- 141,031
Bookmarked by qweermonkey
17 Feb 2026
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working on my backcheck by novembersmith for goluckurself
Fandoms: Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Heated Rivalry (TV)
01 Jan 2026
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Summary
“Ha ha,” Shane says, then, feeling very brave and magnanimous: “Just, you know. I could top, if you wanted me to.”
Ilya laughs at him.
- Language:
- English
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- 5,466
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- 1/1
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- 1
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- 106
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Bookmarked by qweermonkey
17 Feb 2026