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Yamazaki sat alone in the Shinsengumi mess hall, eating his lunch. Tomorrow was Christmas Day, and he was only scheduled to work in the morning. Sure, he was a dateless loser and it wasn't like he would get to spend Christmas with anyone special, but he had heard that this year there would be a small European-style Christmas market on the Southern Terrace of Shinjuku Station in addition to the annual lights and decorations. It might be nice to wander around there and get a break from the hectic atmosphere of the Shinsengumi...
Kondo slammed down his tray as he sat down opposite Yamazaki.
“Yamazaki, I need you to take my evening patrol tomorrow.”
“Huh?” said Yamazaki, startled out of his daydreaming.
“Of course,” continued Kondo, “we'll have to keep this under wraps. I don't want to set a bad example for the men, but these really are exceptional circumstances.”
“Ah, Kondo-san, I, uh...”
“So, what do you say? Will you do this for me?”
Before Yamazaki could even think about it, let alone answer his boss, Hijikata slammed his tray down next to Kondo's.
“Oi, Yamazaki, if you do take his shift, switch with me and take my on-call shift overnight. I'll do the evening patrol.”
Before Yamazaki could react to either of his superiors, Captain Okita popped his head out from under the table, his sleeping mask covering his eyes.
“Yamazaki-san can't help either of you. He is going to be covering both my evening shift and on-call night shift.” This was all news to Yamazaki. He had the feeling this lunch was going to be anything but peaceful.
“What are you even saying?” cried Hijikata. “Stop being lazy and trying to pawn your work off on others!”
Sougo removed his mask and sat down next to Yamazaki, helping himself to his pudding. “I don't know what you mean, Hijikata-san. I am only following your example.”
“It's a completely different situation!” shouted Hijikata, easily riled up by Sougo's calm demeanour and complete lack of respect for him. “I'll have worked all morning and afternoon tomorrow, and I'm on-call all tonight. You aren't even scheduled tomorrow morning or afternoon!”
“Ah, but I don't care about having time-off during the day tomorrow, so it really doesn't count,” Sougo countered between two mouthfuls of pudding.
“Of course it counts!” cried Hijikata slamming his fist on the table.
“Anyway, Yamazaki,” said Kondo, deciding to ignore the two men next to them. “Please take my shift for me.” He clasped his hands together and bowed his head.
“Well... I mean... Kondo-san...”
Kondo looked up at him with huge puppy dog eyes and tears streaming down his face. Yamazaki felt extremely uncomfortable.
“Why don't you just switch with Hijikata-san?” he asked, trying to dodge the issue.
“No! I can't do that to Toshi!” said Kondo, crossing his arms and shaking his head, his attitude switching completely from pitiful beggar to reasonable commander. “I just can't make him work that many shifts in a row. It wouldn't be fair to him.”
“But I want to do the evening shift! It's the night that I want off!”
“Poor Toshi, always so prone to overworking himself,” said Kondo, taking no notice of Hijikata screaming into his ear.
“But, Kondo-san!” protested Hijikata. Kondo simply patted him on the head.
“Don't you worry about it Toshi,” he said. Hijikata grumbled from underneath Kondo's large hand. He picked it up off of his head ans set it down on the table.
“Why do you even want the evening off, Kondo-san?”
“I have a date with Otae-san!” exclaimed Kondo, overjoyed.
Hijikata, Sougo, and Yamazaki were temporarily united as they exchanged awkward and sceptical deadpan looks.
Hijikata cleared his throat, “Uh, Kondo-san, I'm not sure I heard you correctly. Did you say, just now, that you have a date? With Otae-san?” Kondo turned and grabbed onto Hijikata's hands.
“Yes!” he cried, “Yes, I do! Otae-san has finally recognized that our love is meant to be and that together we shall overcome all of life's obstacles!”
“Right... and what exactly did she say when she agreed to this... ah, date?”
Kondo brushed him off, shaking his hand around. “Oh you know,” he said, laughing nervously, “This and that. The usual.”
“Kondo...”
“OK, fine! It isn't exactly a date! And she didn't exactly agree...”
Hijikata pinched the bridge of his nose. “What did she say?”
Kondo looked away shyly, and tapped his two index fingers together in front of his face.
“Well.....” Hijikata gripped Kondo's shoulder, Shinsengumi hierarchy temporarily suspended as his commander needed someone to drag him back to reality.
“Kondoooo,” he said menacingly.
“All right, fine!” said Kondo. “I was saying hello to the Yorozuya whilst on patrol, and Otae-san and Shinpachi-kun stopped to talk to him too. She told Gintoki she and Shinpachi-kun would be going to take a look around the Southern Terrace at Shinjuku Station to see the lights and Christmas market and that he and Kagura should come too.”
Hijikata blinked. Sougo and Yamazaki stared blankly at their commander. How much of an idiot could this guy be?
“You idiot!” hissed Hijikata, “That was clearly her making plans with other people! The conversation had nothing to do with you! Why do you never learn?” He grabbed his superior by the collar and began shaking him.
“But Toshiiiiii,” Kondo whined, tears streaming down his face again, “She definitely knew that I could hear her, so it counts! It counts! It definitely counts!”
“No, it doesn't! It definitely doesn't,” Hijikata shouted back. “You shouldn't be asking for time off on Christmas when you definitely don't have a date!”
“It's funny you should say that, Hijikata-san,” interjected Sougo as he helped himself to Hijikata's pudding. “You're asking for time off tomorrow too, so by your own logic, that must mean that you have a date.”
Hijikata released Kondo's collar.
“I do not have a date,” he said, as neutrally as possible, sitting back down. He noticed his pudding was gone, but simply bit down on the inside of his cheek, determined not to draw attention to himself. Sougo looked him square in the eye and licked pudding off of the lid he had just opened.
“Then why do you want the time off?”
“Look, drop it, I definitely don't have a date! I didn't mean it like that!”
“It definitely sounds like you have a date, Hijikata-san. Why are you hiding it?” Sougo asked before eating a huge spoonful of Hijikata's pudding.
“Don't be ridiculous, you fool. I'm not even asking for the evening shift off. I just don't want to be on-call overnight.”
“Oh,” said Sougo, “ You're meeting your date at night because she's ugly?”
“My date isn't ugly!” cried Hijikata, “ And what would you know? And I don't have a date!”
Kondo put his arm around Hijikata's shoulders.
“Don't be ashamed, Toshi, I'm sure she's a very beautiful girl. And if she isn't, you know what they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.”
“I don't have a date!”
“Oi, come on, Toshi,” said Kondo in a reprimanding tone, “ How would this poor girl feel knowing you're denying her very existence just because she's not the prettiest.”
“She literally doesn't exist!”
“So harsh, Hijikata-san,” said Sougo, all too happy to team up with Kondo in the nonsensical defence of Hijikata's supposed date. “Really, you could break a poor girl's heart like that.”
“There is no girl. I do not have a date. And I'm not interested in the holiday anyway. Who cares about seeing the Christmas lights with a lover? Or getting hot chocolate and walking around the market? It doesn't interest me at all!”
Sougo leaned his face into his palm, elbow on the table, looking bored. “You're no fun, Hijikata-san,” he complained.
Hijikata breathed a sigh of relief, thinking himself off the hook.
“But if you don't have a date,” continued Sougo, “Then why do you so desperately want the night off?”
Hijikata blinked, staring straight ahead. He suddenly sat up straighter. Still looking ahead, he said in a monotone voice “KFC Christmas Special coupons.” He slammed his fist into the palm of his hand.
Sougo looked at him blankly.
“What do you mean Toshi?” asked Kondo.
“I have coupons for a Christmas Dinner Special,” said Hijikata, rummaging through his pocket and producing the coupons. “I want to use them at the end of my shift. So it doesn't matter to me if I have the evening patrol, all I need is to be free before midnight.” Kondo was looking at him strangely, but Hijikata did his best to grit his teeth and ignore him, also trying to ignore the beads of sweat that were starting to form on his forehead.
“I didn't know you liked KFC, Toshi...”
“I adore it. It's a very important part of Christmas for me,” Hijikata lied through his teeth. Kondo looked thoughtful for a moment, rubbing his chin. Suddenly, his eyes were shining.
“Toshi!” he cried enthusiastically, slapping him on the shoulder. “You're going to use these coupons with your date aren't you?”
“I don't have a date!”
“Ah, she's a fuller type of girl who likes this kind of food, isn't she? Is that why you're embarrassed?”
“No! What? What are you even talking about!”
“It's all right Toshi. Whether she's an ugly girl or a Tenko-style girl, we won't judge you! We're just happy you're in love, aren't we?” He said, looking across the table for support.
Yamazaki nervously nodded while Sougo openly laughed.
“Look, for the last time, I don't have a date! And what about you, Sougo, you're trying to get time off as well!”
“I have coupons for a Christmas Dinner Special,” said Sougo holding up some KFC coupons.
“What the hell? Those are my coupons!”
“I want to use them at the end of my shift. So it doesn't matter to me if I have the morning patrol, all I need is to be free before midday.”
“You're just taking what I said and making it suit your own desires!”
“I adore it. It's a very important part of Christmas for me.”
“Sougo!”
“Surely, you understand, Hijikata-san? Or are you only excited for Christmas because you have a date?”
“I do not have a date!”
The last thing Yamazaki remembered was the vice-commander drawing his sword and slamming one foot on the table to swipe at Sougo. As Sougo dived to grab his bazooka, he knocked Yamazaki unconscious. When Yamazaki woke up in the infirmary, Sougo was all too happy to inform him that he would be patrolling in the evening with Hijikata-san, that he had an overnight on-call shift with Kondo-san, and that Sougo himself had somehow managed to end up without a single Christmas shift. Yamazaki groaned and let his head fall back against the pillow in the infirmary bunk. He was going to have a long day tomorrow, he had better get all the rest he needed while he still could.
Yamazaki watched as his vice-commander lit up another cigarette. The burning tip was just one of the many thousands, if not millions, of lights that surrounded them. The illuminations on the Southern Terrace of Shinjuku station never failed to disappoint, and this year the terrace was beautiful: covered in decorations and full of small market booths, sculptures and joyful crowds.
Though he would have preferred to enjoy such a setting while off-duty, Yamazaki was still somewhat grateful that he and Hijikata had ended up completing their patrols here, securing the festivities for the civilians.
Yamazaki squinted as he saw a tall man with spiky brown hair a short distance away. Was that... Yes, it was Kondo-san! He was looking into one of the small wooden huts erected for the European-style Christmas market. He nudged Hijikata with his elbow and, both curious, they made their way over. Kondo was accompanied by Shinpachi, holding a snow-globe and turning it over to examine.
“Yes, I think she would definitely prefer that one,” said Shinpachi.
“Kondo-san,” called Hijikata. Kondo looked up from the snow-globe.
“Ah, Toshi, Yamazaki,” greeted Kondo, “How is the patrol going?”
“Mostly quiet,” replied Hijikata, biting down on his cigarette, “Nothing out of the ordinary so far.”
“Good, good,” said Kondo, “Look what I'm buying for Otae-san.”
“Very nice,” said Hijikata, barely looking at the snow-globe. “Where's your no-good boss?” he asked Shinpachi.
Shinpachi averted his gaze, slightly embarrassed. “Ah, well, Gin-san has a job for today...”
As if on cue, they heard Gintoki shouting:
“Oi! It's not my fault if you can't bring Santa his strawberry milk!”
Next to the snow-globe hut, there was an enormous Christmas tree, at the foot of which was a large plush chair, surrounded by presents, and in which Gintoki was sat, dressed in a Santa costume. In his lap, a small child was crying.
“Come on, the other kids are waiting,” Gintoki told the crying child as he picked him up, stood up, and set him down. “OK, which one of you has sweets for Santa?” he cried out to the group waiting children, readjusting his fake beard.
“Yorozuya!” cried Hijikata, always the first one riled up by his antics.
“Ah, Oogushi-kun! Have you been a good boy this year?”
“Shut up! You're making small children cry!”
Gintoki sat back down on the red chair and patted his knee. “Come sit on my lap and tell Santa-san your Christmas wish.”
“Go to hell, Yorozuya!”
Gintoki threaded his fingers through his fake beard pensively. “Well, I guess you've been a naughty boy after all. What a shame, Santa-san had so many good ideas for presents for you.”
Hijikata turned away, muttering under his breath, and then said, “Look, just stop terrorizing children and we won't arrest you.”
Gintoki raised his hand in a mock salute. “Aye, Aye, Mr Policeman!”
“Come on,” said Hijikata to Yamazaki, “Let's get away from these morons.”
Yamazaki followed his vice-commander, turning around to wave goodbye to his commander and the two members of the Yorozuya while Hijikata marched off without looking back.
They quickly traded in one set of trouble-makers for another. Beyond the wooden huts, there was a magnificent European-style carousel with intricate designs and carvings. It held two storeys of wooden horses and carriages. On top of the carousel, standing on the spinning roof, Sougo and Kagura were chasing each other around, Sougo swinging his sword wildly and Kagura shooting from her parasol liberally.
“Sougo!” shouted Hijikata, “Put that away this instant!”
Sougo noticed him down below and raised an eyebrow. He did put his sword away... only to pull out his bazooka. “You're right, Hijikata-san, this is no time for short range weapons.” He fired at Kagura, who easily dodged the missile. Instead, it hit a Christmas tree behind her. The tree fell backwards, squashing some wooden huts and the snow that had covered its branches fell straight down in a sort of avalanche, covering the parents who had happily been watching their children spin around on the carousel.
“My, my, Hijikata-san, what a big mess you're responsible for now.”
“You're the one who fired that thing!”
Sougo blocked Kagura's incoming punch with barely a grimace. “You really must be more discerning in your orders, Hijikata-san.” Sougo swung his sword at Kagura, managing to nick the tassles of her scarf. “As it is, you're wholey unqualified to be the vice-commander. You should just give me your job.” Kagura managed a swift kick to his ribs, making him gasp, though he quickly hid how breathless it had made him.
“Get down from there!” shouted Hijikata. Sougo approached the edge of the carousel's roof, acting as if he were going to speak to Hijikata. Kagura seized the opportunity to jump up with the intention of landing a kick to the back of his head. Sougo easily executed his trap, not even needing to turn around to confirm what Kagura would do. He ducked down as she flew above him. He reached up to grab her ankle and swung her off her trajectory. Kagura flew straight down, landing on Yamazaki. Yamazaki groaned from beneath her. Sure, she was petite, but she must be one of the densest lifeforms in the universe, given the weight with which she had just hit him.
“No fair, you sadist freak!” Kagura shouted up at Sougo, still squashing Yamazaki.
Sougo shrugged. “Not my fault you always fall into traps so easily. You're too impulsive.”
“Shut up, you brat!” Kagura stood up quickly, meaning to fling herself right back into the fight. Unfortunately, her foot got caught in Yamazaki's uniform jacket, sending her flying onto her face, slamming hard into the ground.
“See, once again you acted too brashly,” said Sougo smugly. “You need to strategize.”
“I don't need to strategize! I have brute force!” Kagura screamed up at him, still lying on the ground, still with her foot caught in Yamazaki's jacket, but having rolled over onto her back.
“Ah, Kagura-chan,” said Yamazaki. “Please stop thrashing around so I can release your foot...” Kagura wriggled around in frustation a few seconds longer before finally relenting. She lay still with a massive pout and her arms crossed over her chest. Yamazaki released her foot and offered her a hand to help her up once he had gingerly stood up himself. He could already feel the bruises forming from where she had slammed into him.
“Thanks,” said Kagura, still pouting.
“You're such a sore loser,” Sougo taunted her.
She picked up her parasol. “Whatever, I'm going back to find Gin-chan.”
As she walked off, Sougo jumped down from the roof, landing in front of Yamazaki and Hijikata.
“So how are you two dateless losers enjoying Christmas?” he asked. Yamazaki was sadly far too used to such insults from his own inner psyche to even be mildly offended. Hijikata, however, bristled.
“Would you just shut up! And anyway, I don't see you with a date today.”
“Whatever,” Sougo simply shrugged and strode away with his hands in his pockets. Yamazaki could see Hijikata's vein throbbing in his temple as he stared after Sougo's retreating back.
“Why don't we keep moving?” he gently suggested.
“Tch.” Hijikata tore his gaze away to grab a cigarette. He barely nodded to Yamazaki before beginning to walk off in the opposite direction to Sougo.
It was beginning to get dark. Yamazaki looked out wistfully towards the last rays of the setting sun. The way the warm orange of its light flitred through the low, misty clouds brought even more charm to the festivities. Even Hijikata was letting himself relax into the setting: he was becoming significantly less grumpy than he had been earlier in the day. Though perhaps that was also due to so many consecutive shifts coming to an end for him, thought Yamazaki. They had done many perimetre checks and circled back through the central market area. Yamazaki spotted Kondo again. This time he was sat down at a small table with Otae under an outdoor heater. They raised their glasses in a toast and, incredibly enough, both seemed relaxed and happy.
“Hijikata-san,” he hissed, grabbing his superior's jacket before he could walk into Otae's line of sight. Hijikata turned to face him with a sharp glare, but then followed Yamazaki's gaze to see Kondo and Otae sitting together and nodded, understanding immediately. Spying on their superior be damned, they had to know what was going on.
They turned back and circled behind the wooden hut selling mulled wine. They squatted down and snuck behind the decorative displays of chopped wood that framed the small seating area were their commander sat. Hijikata followed Yamazaki's lead, and Yamazaki was glad he could show off some of his stealth skills in front of his vice-commander. Once in place, they both slowly raised up their heads to spy over the wood piles. They couldn't make out what exactly was being said, but they were both shocked to see Otae who seemed to be sincerely laughing at a joke Kondo had just told. Yamazaki spotted the snow-globe Kondo had bought earlier on the table, and noted how Otae kept trailing her fingers over it.
Hijikata and Yamazaki turned to look at each, both unable to believe what they were seeing and needing to confirm it with an outside observer.
Things seemed to calm down between Kondo and Otae as they stopped laughing and simply stared at each other. Yamazaki couldn't take his eyes off of them. There was no way Kondo was finally managing to have such an intimate moment. There was no way this could actually be happening –
Things were cut short when something hit Kondo square in the face, sending him flying back and knocking him out of his chair. Otae stood up concerned, leaning over the table to look at him, and placing herself in the way of another projectile. Yamazaki had barely registered what was going on when he saw Hijikata next to Otae, pulling her out of harm's way and being hit himself by...
Yamazaki watched as the object fell to the ground after hitting Hijikata on the head... A heart-shaped gingerbread cookie? Several more projectiles came their way, Hijikata and Otae ducked for cover under the table. The projectiles were quickly followed by Kagura who was running backwards and dodging them in a series of handsprings and jumps. Yamazaki realized she also had her own stash of cookies in a bag strapped across her chest, and, whenever she could, she was launching them at none other than Sougo, who was running and jumping across the roofs of the wooden huts, expertly throwing cookies with force and precision in a shuriken style. Unrelenting, he barely gave Kagura a chance to go on the offensive, keeping her occupied with his steady stream of cookies.
Fortunately for Kagura, Sougo was getting too comfortable in owning the highground. Too focused on keeping her busy, he hadn't been paying as much attention to their surroundings as she had and hadn't realized that her final handspring, rather than dodging his attack, was actually a way of kicking the decorative logs over herself and straight at him. His eyes widened in panic for a small second as he took in the sight of a dozen or so logs flying straight towards him. He swerved to the side and managed to dodge most of them... except for one log that hit him square in the face and sent him flying backwards, landing painfully on his behind.
Sougo scrunched his eyes in pain and felt a shadow cast over him. Upon opening his eyes he saw Kagura standing above him menacingly, her hands full of heart-shaped cookies ready to be thrown right at him with full Yato force.
“Oi! Stop that!”
Kagura turned around. “Gin-chan?”
“What's the meaning of this?” demanded Gintoki, still in his Santa costume – minus the beard, – snatching the gingerbread out of Kagura's hands. “Sure, Gin-san prefers softer sweet things like parfaits or puddings, but crunchy sweet things have their place in Gin-san's heart too. How could you be so cruel to these innocent cookies? And on Christmas Day too.”
“But Gin-san – !” Kagura was cut off when Gintoki shoved a cookie into her mouth.
“I don't want to hear it.”
“Danna, you really shouldn't get into what doesn't concern you,” said Sougo, getting back up and brushing down the front of his clothes.
“Oi, Souchiro-kun, you could be more grateful that I just saved your arse.”
“You know I don't bother myself with such small ideas as loyalty,” said Sougo, red eyes shining as he had suddenly procured another stash of cookie-missiles – form Kagura? What kind of bullshit truce was that? – and stared down his nose at Gintoki.
Gintoki suddenly found himself under the menacing gazes of both Kagura and Sougo. They grinned maniacally and readied their cookie-throwing arms. Gintoki became very pale as the switch in the situation set in.
“Sougo! China! Stop that!” ordered Hijikata. “You can't keep disturbing the peace like this.” He came to stand next to Gintoki, looking at them pointedly.
Kagura huffed in frustration, her intimidating attitude deflated. “Stupid Mayo-head...” she grumbled and strode off.
“You're no fun, Hijikata-san,” agreed Sougo, following her.
Hijikata ignored them and lit a cigarette.
“Ooh! Oogushi-kun!” called Gintoki, slinging his arm ove rhis shoulder, “You came to Gin-san's rescue! How sweet!”
“Tch.” Hijikata tried ignoring him.
“There, there, I have something better for that mouth of yours,” said Gintoki, removing the cigarette. Momentarily shocked, Hijikata's mouth gaped a little. Of course, given the opening, Gintoki shoved a gingerbread cookie inside.
Hijikata gasped in discomfort. Gintoki patted him on the back.
“Come on Hijikata-kun, I know you can open it wider than that.” Hijikata spat the cookie out and brought his hand to his sword.
“Yorozuyaaaaa,” he said, voice heavy with many threats.
“Oh is that the time?” said Gintoki, looking at his naked wrist, “Gin-san has to get back to being Santa-san. See you later!” He ran off quickly, leaving Hijikata to grumble and take out another cigarette.
Beside him, Kondo had been helping Otae up and checking she was all right.
“I'm sorry about Kagura,” said Otae, “She does tend to get a little too excited whenever there's a holiday... or any type of festival... or food...”
“Don't worry about it,” said Yamazaki, “Our captain isn't exactly innocent here either.” Otae blinked at him, her face impassive. Damn it, thought Yamazaki, she hadn't even realized he was there too until he had spoken.
Kondo cleared his throat. “Anyway, good job diffusing the situation there, Toshi. You guys keep up the good work.” Hijikata nodded in the commander's direction as he and Otae walked off to enjoy a less damaged part of the market. Hijikata turned to Yamzaki.
“We had better help with the clean up a little.”
Yamazaki sighed. All he wanted was to enjoy the holiday before it ended.
Yamazaki sighed and leaned against the lamppost behind him. It was covered in tiny LED lights as was everything else around them. They were in a quieter part of the Southern Terrace with more greenery and every single tree was lost under a mass of thousands of tiny glowing lights. Yamazaki looked out at the small sinewy path stretching out in front of him. It was often called the “lovers' walk” and it had been full of couples taking pictures earlier but was now practically empty due to the late hour. He would have loved to walk down it with somebody, through the knee high shrubbery littered with lights, beneath the glowing tree branches and surrounded by the sparkling hanging ornaments...
Hijikata approached him from behind and patted him on the shoulder.
“I'll be leaving you to it, then. Make sure you get back to the barracks in time for the on-call shift.” He had changed into his dark blue off-duty clothing and his thick red scarf.
“Of course, Fukuchou,” said Yamazaki, gloomily. Sure, he had been a single loser on Christmas for the past few hours, but at least he hadn't been alone. He looked over to Hijikata, who was stood up, straight and stiff, and who was anxiously scanning the scattered couples walking around in front of them.
“Hijikata-san – ” Yamazaki began to say, but Hijikata had suddenly spotted what he had been looking for and walked away without even hearing him. Yamazaki watched him move down the lovers' walk: his vice-commander had first strode off at a fast, rhythmic pace, but he suddenly slowed as he arrived at the beginning of the path. His movements became less impulsive and his steps became smaller, more controlled, almost hesitant. Yamazaki watched as Hijikata became engulfed by the soft glow of the white and gold lighting. His vice-commander seemed to cross into another realm, one where time slowed down and everything shifted together. The edges of Hijikata's silhouette became blurry and he seemed to be floating rather than walking through glowing knee-high shrubbery, his feet hidden from Yamazaki's view.
Yamazaki caught sight of a glare of white brighter than the rest. He realized it was the Yorozuya Danna's hair. He was a little further along the lovers' walk, back in his regular clothes, looking out between two trees over the roofs of the huts from the Christmas market on one of the lower levels of the terrace. He tilted his head back and seemed to be staring straight into the night sky, into the dark blue world beyond the golden cosiness of the lovers' walk and the sparkling lights.
Hijikata had stopped a few steps short of Gintoki, who turned his head over his shoulder and saw him approaching. Gintoki had a small smile on his face, and Hijikata closed the distance between them, coming to stand by his side, looking out over the market as well, standing so close their arms were touching.
Yamazaki saw his vice-commander let his head loll and drop onto the Yorozuya's shoulder. Wow, thought Yamazaki, Poor vice-commander! He must really be exhausted after all of those consecutive shifts... How nice of Danna to let him rest like that...
Yamazaki's hand closed around a piece of paper in his pocket. Confused, he pulled it out to look at it. Oh no! The vice-commander's KFC coupons! He had given them to Yamazaki to hold on to earlier. Yamazaki had forgotten to give them back, and the vice-commander was probably so tired that he forgot to ask. After all the sacrifices his vice-commander had made in the past twenty-four hours, Yamazaki just couldn't let him walk away without his prize.
Determined, Yamazaki started to make his way down the lovers' walk. It really was a beautiful evening in a magical setting. Surrounded by the lights, Yamazaki felt as if he had left Edo behind altogether. The cold winter night seemed pushed back by the warmth of couples and friends huddled together, walking together, illuminated by the ethereal golden glow. Yamazaki looked up at the shining branches above him and the ornaments – tiny stars and baubles – that seemed to float just below them. A sky beneath the sky, one that seemed to envelop him and everything else in a reassuring delicate haze.
He brought his gaze back down to Hijikata and Gintoki. They too had been taken in by the muted atmosphere. While looking at these two men interacting was usually like seeing an agitated clash of harsh lines pulling apart and smashing together repeatedly, for once Yamazaki felt an aura of calm around them. In the soft glow of the thousands of little lights surrounding them, everything suddenly seemed easier. The outlines of their bodies seemed to blur together where they were touching, and Yamazaki found it hard to reconcile such a harmonious picture with their usual arguing.
Gintoki put his arm around Hijikata and squeezed him closer. Yamazaki was close enough to hear some snippets of their conversation.
“... not like we could have wandered around openly...” he heard his vice-commander say.
“At least we got to see the lights together,” he heard Danna say in response, slowly rubbing Hijikata's arm.
Hijikata lifted his face from Gintoki's shoulder, looking up into his face. From where he was standing, Yamazaki could see Gintoki's gentle smile as he looked back at Hijikata with a look of such content bliss.
Yamazaki saw his vice-commander's head tilt up as the Yorozuya's Danna's head tilted down, their faces closer and closer, Gintoki's eyes closing and lips parting...
“Fukuchou!”
Stunned by his shout, Hijikata and Gintoki shot apart, heads snapping round to stare at him. Clearly shocked to see him standing there, both of their expressions looked panicked for a second. Yamazaki was frozen to the spot. He had no idea what had made him shout out like that. Something had been bubbling up inside him and he had been unable to contain it. Recovered from their initial shock, the two men stared at him intently. Hijikata was absolutely furious, gritting his teeth with a murderous gaze and closed fists. Next to him, Gintoki leaned back, his dead-fish eyes giving nothing away as he stared off in complete nonchalance.
“Uh...” Yamazaki began, he had to get himself out of this somehow, somehow... Think fast, think fast... oh, right! – “Your coupons!” he cried, raising up his hand holding the coupons. “You forgot your coupons!” he concluded proudly.
The utterly still seconds that passed seemed infinitely long to Yamazaki. Even Gintoki stopped twisting around his finger in his nose. Yamazaki saw Hijikata's face begin to twitch.
“The... coupons...” Hijikata bit out.
“Ah, uh, yes... the coupons,” replied Yamazaki awkwardly, rubbing at the back of his neck.
“You're going to take those coupons and shove them up your own arse before I make you commit seppuku,” threatened Hijikata.
“Whoa! No!” interrupted Gintoki, “I'll take them.” He snatched the coupons out of Yamazaki's hand and began studying them.
“Yamazaki!” shouted Hijikata drawing his sword. Yamazaki squealed and began to run away, Hijikata hot on his tail, swinging his sword. Why was this happening to him? All he had wanted was to help the vice-commander! Yamazaki did his best to weave through the couples walking around while occasionally calling for mercy over his shoulder. His vice-commander did not seem to be at all in a forgiving mood.
Yamazaki nervously wiped the sweat from his forehead. Hidden in a bush towards the edge of the Southern Terrace, it looked like he had finally managed to shake Hijikata. Or rather – Hijikata had finally lost interest in him, more likely. Yamazaki peeked out of his bush and saw Kondo walking with Otae. Strangely enough, it actually seemed that she was enjoying herself as she chattered away with him. As they stopped next to his bush, Yamazaki subconsciously leaned back, not wanting to intrude. Unfortunately, he pushed back onto a sharp twig that dug painfully into his behind. He bit down on his lip, tears prickling in the corners of his eyes – they were too close to him: if he moved now he would draw attention to himself and ruin things for Kondo-san, he had to sit tight!
Otae laughed at something Kondo had just said.
“I had a really nice time tonight,” she told him, delicately, smiling and placing a hand on his arm. Kondo's cheeks became bright red. Otae-san was actually touching him! She was smiling at him! She was staring right into his eyes! The moment seemed achingly suspended in time for both Kondo and Yamazaki.
Yamazaki couldn't be sure because of the tears blurring his vision, but it looked as if Otae was beginning to slightly lean her chin up towards Kondo. Could she... ? Was she going to … ? Surprised, and overjoyed for this commander, Yamazaki couldn't help but gasp, causing him to lose balance and let the twig dig into his left butt cheek even more painfully, he toppled over and howled as several twigs grazed him.
Otae snapped her head round, distracted by the strange noises coming from the shrubbery. Confused, and unable to identify the source of the noise, she turned back to Kondo.
“It was good to see you without the cockroach mask...What a shame you're on call tonight,” she said with shrug. And in the blink of an eye she had already jogged off and joined Kyuubei who had been standing a little further off, narrowing her single eye at Kondo. She and Otae linked arms and were quickly absorbed in the crowd, disappearing from view.
Kondo stood alone, still in the same position, still with red cheeks, and still staring off into the place Otae had stood moments before. He leaned forward, puckering his lips, reaching out his arms and embraced thin air. He blinked twice.
“O.. Otae-san...?” he suddenly seemed aware of his surroundings. “OTAE-SAAAAN!” he cried, falling to his knees.
Yamazaki emerged from the bush, rubbing at his behind and trying to hide the tears in his uniform's trousers. “There, there, Kondo-san,” he said, rubbing his commander's shoulders.
“Otae-san....” Kondo moaned out, gloomily. Yamazaki pulled him up and slipped Kondo's arm around his shoulder, half-dragging him along. It was going to be a long trip back to the barracks.
As much as Yamazaki had enjoyed still being able to somewhat enjoy the festivities whilst on patrol, he really wished he and Kondo had not been called back to the Terrace as back-up for the third time since the beginning of their on-call shift. They shouldn't even bother making the trip to the barracks this time, seeing as their colleagues and aquaintances were just completely incapable of behaving like civilized creatures.
He and Kondo had first been called back over to break up a fight between a homeless man in sunglasses and a large duck-shaped amanto over a candy apple. Thankfully the situation hadn't escalated and they had let both perpetrators go with a simple slap on the wrist (wing?). Then Kondo could have sworn he had seen Katsura, so he had dragged Yamazaki into a fruitless chase all around the wooden huts that had ended with a wooden chest in one of the stalls that held an arrangements of candy canes that spelled out “JOI.” They dragged themselves back to the barracks only to be called out to break up another fight between Kagura and Sougo – this time only a classic snowball fight... save the monstrous size of the snowballs the Yato girl was making and throwing... and Sougo's use of his bazooka to blow them apart. This time they had been called out because Toujou had thought a long haired man in a Christmas-pirate costume was making fun of his mistress's eye patch and, in attempting to chase him down to defend his Lady, he had torn through the market, disturbing citizens and causing chaos. He and the pirate had fought, causing further distress around them, before the pirate disappeared in cloud of smoke.
Konda and Yamazaki stood amongst the debris, taking a statement from Otae while Kyuubei dealt with Toujou.
“I'm sorry that you had to come all this way,” said Otae, looking a little embarrassed.
“Ah, it's nothing!” said Kondo, quick to reassure her despite his obvious nerves, “It's all part of the job.” He turned to Yamzaki. “Radio back to HQ that you and I are just going to stick around here in case anything else comes up.” Yamazki did so, appreciating how his commander had used his strategic mind to best allocate the Shinsengumi ressources. Or not, he realized as he saw Kondo look at Otae walk away in complete and utter disappointment.
“Otae-san...” he mumbled, tears welling up.
“Come on, Commander, why don't we do a perimetre check,” offered Yamazaki, desperate to get his boss to focus on something else. Kondo shook himself out of his maudlin mood and Yamzaki breathed a sigh of relief.
Yamazaki did his best to keep his commander distracted. It was hardly professional, given that they were supposed to cultivate an awareness of their surroundings, but Yamazaki was sure to point Kondo's attention to every shiny or vaguely intersting object around them. Anything to keep him from thinking back to Otae-san walking off.
“Oh, look, isn't that Hijikata-san?” asked Yamazaki, pointing to where Hijikata was sitting on a bench, smoking.
“Oi, Toshi!” called Kondo. Hijikata looked up towards them. He looked annoyed and greeted them with a curt nod. “Are you enjoying yourself?” asked Kondo, oblivious.
“Just making the most of a peaceful evening by myself,” Hijikata replied, looking at them pointedly. Yamazaki and Kondo stayed glued to the spot, smiling stupidly.
Gintoki walked over to their group with two mugs of hot chocolate. “Sorry for the wait, there was a line,” he told Hijikata, handing him a mug. “Yo,” he casually greeted Kondo and Yamazaki, raising his now free hand in greeting before sitting down next to Hijikata.
“Yorozuya, good to see you,” greeted Kondo in return. He turned back to Hijikata, “So, Toshi, tell us, where's your date?” Hijikata spat out some of the warm milk he had just been drinking. Gintoki began laughing loudly next to him.
“What is it?” asked Kondo, “What's so funny?”
“Don't worry about it, Gori,” said Gintoki. “Toshi here will let you know when he's ready,” he said breezily, slinging his arm around Hijikata's shoulders. Hijikata only grumbled into his hot chocolate.
“Gin-chan!” They all turned in the direction the voice had called out from. Kagura came running up to them. “Gin-chan! It's not fair! The sadist won't buy me hot chocolate!”
“Maybe you should try having some money on you instead of trying to eat everything in sight, pig,” said Sougo, walking up behind her, sipping from his mug.
“Gin-chan, buy some for me! You owe me 300 yen anyway!”
“No way! You're the one who owes me 300 yen!”
“Just give me yours!” she said, reaching out to grab his mug.
“No! This is Gin-san's!” Gintoki tried dodging her snatching, sloshing his mug around and putting its contents in danger.
Hijikata sighed, fishing through his pockets. He handed Kagura some cash.
“Oi, China. Here, take this and go get yourself your own.”
“Thank you, Toshi!” she cried, eyes comically wide and welling up with tears.
“Who're you calling Toshi? Get out of here!” Kagura wasted no time running off with the cash.
Sougo lowered his mug and narrowed his eyes at Hijikata. “I wouldn't have done that if I were you, Hijikata-san.” Hijikata shrugged and sipped from his mug.
Judging from the glint in Sougo's eyes, Yamazaki assumed his next move would either be physically violent – perhaps making an attempt on the vice-commander's life – or he would launch a psychological offensive.
Sougo made a point of ostentatiously looking around their surroundings, even crouching down to look underneath the bench and moving people side to side to look behind them. He did all of this with blank eyes and a bored face.
“Hijikata-san,” he called in an exagerated monotone. “I don't see your date anywhere. Did you hide your date when you saw us coming?”
Psychological it was, then. Hijikata rose to the bait immediately.
“Sougoooo,” he ground out angrily, clenching his fist. Gintoki's face didn't give much away, as per usual, but he softly touched Hijikata's forearm and Hijikata released the pressure in his fist reflexively.
Sougo blinked at them twice. Yamazaki could have sworn that, for a split second, he saw a lightbulb above his head suddenly flicker on. Sougo face was practically split in two by the huge sadistic smile that spread across it.
“Ah, so I see some of us are enjoying Christmas after all. I can't wait to see what Santa Claus brings you~” He walked away in the direction Kagura had left, chuckling to himself. Though Yamazaki couldn't quite understand what was going on, he was left with a strange sense of foreboding.
He and Kondo bid farewell to Hijikata and Gintoki – who hardly seemed sorry to see them go – and continued on their way.
When he finally returned to the barracks at the end of his shift in the early hours of the morning, Yamazaki was exhausted. He couldn't wait to shower and crawl into bed. As he advanced through the barracks, he could see some light coming from the vice-commander's room. He frowned. After the unreasonably long day Hijikata-san had had and after so many consecutive shifts, he really should have been sleeping at this hour. Knowing him, he was no doubt catching up on some paperwork at the expense of his health and his rest.
Yamazaki couldn't help but feel guilty for angering his vice-commander earlier that evening when he had gone to give him the coupons. Hijikata had given up the chase quite early, and though letting Yamazaki off the hook so quickly was unusually charitable for the vice-commander, he had still seemed annoyed when they had bumped into him afterwards, and Yamazaki still felt he should apologize formally. And offering to take over whatever work Hijikata was still doing certainly couldn't hurt either. He reached out to open the door when he heard someone call out.
“Oi!”
Yamazaki turned to see Hijikata walking up behind him with cigarettes and a bag from the convenience store.
“Ah, Hijikata-san! I wanted to apologize for earlier–”
“Save it,” said Hijikata, holding his free hand up in front of Yamazaki's face. “I want you to forget about it. All of it.” He stared Yamazaki down intently.
Yamazaki could feel himself begin to sweat under the fearsome gaze.
“Right, of course,” he agreed, not entirely sure what exactly Hijikata was referring to.
“Oi,” called a third voice. Gintoki slid open the door from inside Hijikata's room and faced them. His hair was a mess and he was shirtless. “I was starting to fall asleep waiting for you,” he said to Hijikata.
“Shut up, I made a quick detour coming back to pick you up some sweets,” he replied, holding up the bag. Gintoki smiled dreamily.
“Ah, Hijikata-kun, you sure do treat me right.” He wasted no time rummaging through the bag as he retreated back into the room.
Hijikata turned to glare sharply at Yamazaki.
“This too,” he said. “Forget all about this too. The Yorozuya was never here tonight.”
“Huh?” Yamazaki blinked. Wait, were Hijikata-san and Danna...?
Gintoki stepped back out and wrapped his arms around Hijikata from behind.
“Got that Jimi-kun?” he said, “Nothing to see here.” He gave Hijikata a quick kiss on the cheek – making Hijikata splutter indignantly – and pulled him inside the room, sliding the door shut behind them.
Yamazaki stared at the closed door. Oh. Realization dawned. Oh! Feeling his face burn with embarrassment, he quickly backed away, running down the hallway, back to the main hall, and away , far away as possible, from the vice-commander's room. No wonder Hijikata-san had been so pissed off at him earlier. Just how dense could he be?
Yamazaki was still kicking himself as he walked further through the barracks. He noticed Captain Okita's door was slightly open, with some low light seeping through. Cautiously, he peered in. He saw Sougo and Kagura lying on their backs sleeping, several empty buckets of KFC around them (though mostly around Kagura). He smiled to himself, so that's who the coupons must have ended up with.
Yamazaki slid the door shut and wanted to pat himself on the back – at least he had somewhat seen that one coming. His smugness quickly vanished when he realized the implications, however. Sougo, that insane psychopath, had actually had a date for Christmas since the very start. Hijikata, as scary and particular as he was had also apparently enjoyed a romantic Christmas. Even Kondo-san, a gorilla and a stalker, had at least somewhat managed to have a Christmas date night.
Yamazaki felt utterly defeated. Just how pathetically single was he that he was shown up by these guys? Was he the only single man in the Shinsengumi?
He sighed and looked up at the sky as he went out into the courtyard. Maybe he should hang out with Shinpachi so they could commiserate over how wrapped up in each other their bosses and colleagues were, and just as he was complaining to him a beautiful female badminton player would appear and fall into his arms. Or maybe Tama-chan would be willing to give him another shot. There was no way the writer would simply end the story, after everything he had been through, and simply leave him sad and single without even the hope of some pairing, right?
A large black title card plunged everything into darkness and Yamazaki couldn't help but cry dramatically as the word “Fin” appeared in the centre in a curly white script.