Chapter Text
Well, fuck me gently with a chainsaw, Tony thinks numbly. The guy’s a dom.
He isn’t alone with that realization. Everybody who was waiting on the roof of the tower thinks that, although they probably don’t use a quote from an almost thirty year old teen movie to express their astonishment.
It’s too quiet on the roof, for a while. There’s the rushing of wind and the sound of the traffic from deep beneath them, but the silence between them stretches long and awkward. Thor, who still has a hand on his brother’s arm, looks extraordinarily confused, and Loki - well.
When they appeared just two minutes ago, Loki wore an expression of boredom, dyed with just a hint of mockery. But now his eyes are narrowed, the look in them icy. He’s still calm, all in all, but it’s clear that he has figured out that something’s up. Relaxed looks different.
It’s Rogers who breaks the silence, in the end.
“Tony,” he says, quietly. “Would you like to wait -”
“Yeah, no,” Tony interrupts, because he is definitely not having any of that shit right now. “You can stop right there, Rogers.”
The Captain gives him a slightly exasperated, but not very surprised look, which earns him a lopsided grin that is just entirely insincere. Tony takes a step forward, yanking his eyes away from Loki to look at Thor.
“Hey, Thunderpants. You’re kinda late, but I’ll let it pass. So, I suggest that you go downstairs with our dear friends from SHIELD and deliver some much needed explanations, eh? Meanwhile I’ll show your baby brother where he’ll be sleeping for the next few years.”
Great, now everybody is staring at him as if he said something particularly crazy. Tony is just glad that Fury isn’t here, because he would make everything much more complicated. Maria Hill, however, simply raises a brow at him, and when he nods she lifts a shoulder - not an enthusiastic yes, but it will do - and that’s it.
Romanoff and Barton don’t look very pleased with this outcome, but well, they can fucking deal. Rogers, too, and if he does so much as breathe one more patronizing word into Tony’s direction, Tony will blast him right back into the ice he came from.
Thankfully, Steve stays silent. Everybody stays silent, really, and not long after Tony and Loki are alone in an elevator, which makes Tony feel just a tiny bit nervous. He doesn’t let it show - he’s had decades of practice - and leans against the railing, his arms crossed and eyes fixed on Loki. The god watches him in return, his face blank, and Tony wonders if Loki even knows what’s up.
It’s even more noticeable from up close. Unmistakable, really - Tony can tell by the way Loki holds himself, by the way his eyes flicker around subtly and take in everything. But there are also other clues, some of which aren’t easily described. It’s more a matter of just sensing how it is, or maybe of instincts, but either way, Tony knows. He has always been very good at this; always had to be very good at this. By now he can smell a dom from five miles against the wind, only that it isn’t about smelling at all.
“Do I get my own floor?” Loki asks two seconds after the elevator started, his voice quiet and smooth. Maybe a little amused, even.
“Yes,” Tony answers. “That was part of the deal, wasn't it?"
Loki acknowledges that by inclining his head, but he doesn’t say anything. His eyes are still on Tony, never once moving away from him. Tony feels the hairs on his neck stand on end. He wonders how he didn’t notice this during the invasion, wonders how nobody noticed. Hell, Tony even talked to Loki in his own penthouse, and even though Loki spent the whole battle being as cocky as he could even be, it wasn’t a show of dominance that affected Tony in any way. Loki could have told him to kneel and Tony would just have raised a brow, probably he would have been insulted. And, fine, Tony wouldn’t immediately drop to his knees now, either, but at least now he’s aware that there is a dom very close to him, and he did let Loki enter the elevator first without even looking at him. (Small acts of politeness, of service. First clues that a kid might become a sub, later on.)
It’s weird. It shouldn’t be possible - you don’t just stop being a dom for a few days just so you can invade a planet. Maybe Loki is a switch, but even then he would have had all subs in New York wrapped around his little finger during the invasion, and it certainly wouldn’t have been fear that made the people in Stuttgart kneel.
No, Loki isn’t a switch; or at least Tony doesn’t think he is. It's been almost two years since the battle - what makes the most sense is that Loki just wasn’t in his right mind when he came to fuck them up, and that he just managed to get his shit together while they decided what to do with him up in God Land. Which is basically what Thor claims is true, anyway.
The elevator stops, and Loki saunters out of it as soon as the doors open, as if the place belongs to him. Tony follows him with a roll of his eyes, then watches while Loki considers his new apartment. It’s just like the other floors in the tower that are meant to accomodate people - a living room and a kitchen, a bedroom with an en suite, lots of light and a spectacular view.
“Is this to your satisfaction?” Tony drawls, barely resisting to add a sir just to be especially rude. For most doms, insincere displays of respect are a red rag. Tony isn’t sure how Loki would react; maybe he would even take it seriously. Better not to take any risks. A possibly still mental god thinking that Tony wants to submit to him is the last thing he needs right now.
Loki turns back to him with a raised brow, which tells Tony that his feigned courtesy didn’t go unnoticed. “It will do,” Loki says smoothly. “Thank you.”
Ah. Well, that’s feigned gratitude right there, isn’t it? Two can play this game, apparently.
Tony smirks at the god. “I’m glad. So, a few rules - you can move freely in the tower, which means that you can lurk around the community floor and the gym as you please, but when I catch you trying to get into any part of the tower that’s reserved for Stark Industries, you won’t like the consequences. Clear?”
Loki’s other brow joins the first; he didn't expect that. Of course he didn't, a sub telling them what to do would make most doms first speechless, then angry.
Loki doesn’t seem angry, though, just amused. “Clear,” he echoes, in a tone that says that yes, he understood, but no, he doesn’t really care.
“Great,” Tony says dryly. “JARVIS will make sure that your kitchen’s always stocked. If you have any special wishes - be it food or clothes or whatever -, tell him and he’ll take care of it.”
“JARVIS?” Loki repeats, frowning slightly.
“Yeah. Say hi, J.”
“Hi,” the AI says dutifully. “Welcome at Stark Tower, sir.” He pauses, then, “I’m sorry, but I am not entirely sure how to call you. Is it Odinson?”
For the first time, Loki seems actually pissed. He scowls at the ceiling. “No, it is not. I’ll go by Liesmith, if you’d be so kind.”
“Of course, Mr. Liesmith.”
“Good choice,” Tony says. “Makes you seem very trustworthy. Okay, apart from that, there’s not much else to say. If there’s a mission or a meeting or anything like that, JARVIS will tell you, and then you better get your ass up and join the fun, because otherwise you’re back in your cell in Oz faster than you can say ‘Kansas’.”
Loki looks at him as if he wonders if Tony has lost his mind. Tony is used to that.
“Any questions?” he asks, smiling at Loki brightly.
“No,” Loki says. “You may go.”
Okay, yes, that does irk Tony a bit, but it’s not like he isn’t used to that, too. He simply rolls his eyes and turns to leave, letting Loki think that Tony was just waiting for the permission to leave.
It’s not like what Loki thinks really matters, anyway.
x
Weeks pass. At the beginning it’s a little weird, because Tony is all too aware that there is someone new living in his tower, someone who is on their side only because he considers it to be the best of the very few options he has. That Loki is a dom doesn’t really help. Thor, even though he already knew about how these things work on Earth, was nonplussed when he learned that, apparently, things seemed to work pretty much the same way for his brother. The whole adopted thing has an entirely new meaning now.
Maybe Tony wouldn’t have agreed to this if he had known that Loki is a dom, but now it’s just too late to disagree. It will just be for a few years, anyway, and if he’s honest he expected it to be worse. Loki doesn’t leave his rooms except when there is a mission or to train in the gym, where he is every morning. The others in the tower learned that quickly, and by now they just let Loki have those two hours before sunrise.
Loki doesn’t talk much. He is quiet on missions, only speaks up when he has something important to say or to snarl at his brother - or to respond to Tony’s snark with some of his own, sometimes. He is also very, very effective. Tony has never seen anybody wield knives like Loki does.
And that’s exactly where the problems start.
x
The first time Tony thinks - absently and vaguely - that he would like to feel Loki's hands on him, it catches him by surprise. Not because it's unexpected, because it really isn't. Loki is hot as hell and also clever, and most of all he's competent. He knows what he is doing and he's arrogant about it, too, and somehow that ticks all of Tony's boxes. That Loki is (was) a bad guy doesn't really matter, because he is on their side now, no matter the circumstances, and apart from that Tony has the habit of being attracted to people he shouldn't be attracted to, and he's long given up resisting that.
They are sitting in the conference room on the community floor, but Tony has stopped listening a while ago. There was a battle earlier today, and now Loki is explaining how the Enchantress' spells work, and he does that by drawing elaborate patterns on a piece of paper. Tony hasn't thought about that yet, so he has no idea what the patterns are supposed to explain, and honestly he doesn't even care right now. He's busy staring at Loki's hands.
The fact that the thought he's having exists isn't surprising, but the intensity of it is. Tony hasn't been with a dom since before Afghanistan, and until now he thought that he would never want to be with one again. (Well, he and Pepper did play a bit now and then, but that never worked well.) His priorities shifted and by now he's just too much of a mess. Too obsessive, too manic, too paranoid. He probably isn't even able to go under anymore, and what kind of dom would want a sub like that?
Still, the thought keeps, well, existing, and Loki's hands are entirely to blame for it.
Pale and long-fingered, and clever. They look strong, too, and Tony knows that they are strong. He knows what they look like wrapped around the handle of a dagger, or glowing green and golden. Now Tony thinks that he would like to have one of them on the back of his neck, pressing him down into a bed.
Huh.
Loki stops drawing, and he also stops talking. It makes Tony blink and realize that he should really concentrate on things that don't make him need a very cold shower very soon, so he looks at the patterns Loki drew, frowning.
"Look, I'm sure this is supposed to explain something," Clint says. "But I don't get it."
"That might be because you are daft," Loki tells him kindly. "This is really not -"
"Codes," Tony interrupts, leaning forward to take a closer look. "Looks like codes, like a program. There are -" He reaches out for the pencil and points at a few spots on the paper. "Weaknesses. Here, here and here."
He looks up to meet Loki's eyes, and finds the god watching him, surprise clear on his face.
"Yes," Loki says after a second, and now there's a smirk tugging at his lips. "Very good."
Tony grins at him. "So you know how to find them, obviously. Do you also know how to exploit them?"
"Naturally."
"How?" somebody else asks; who it is isn't important.
What is important is how annoyed by the interruption Loki seems to be, and how reluctantly he yanks his eyes away from Tony to answer the question.
x
A few days later, the Enchantress has moved into a cell up in Asgard, and Tony asks Loki if he wants a drink.
It's not like he planned to ask. And it's not like he doesn't know that he shouldn't ask. But, well, Tony only has a brain-to-mouth filter in theory, and he spent all day looking at Loki and his fucking hands, and there is only so much he can stand.
They had the post-battle meeting in the med bay of the tower because Clint managed to break his arm, but Tony left as soon as he saw that Loki was leaving, and now they are standing in a mostly empty hallway, the voices of the team still in the background.
"I beg your pardon?" Loki says, and he sounds so absolutely dumbfounded that Tony has to laugh.
"A drink," he repeats. "Up in the penthouse. I owe you one."
Loki's face goes on a literal rollercoaster of emotions, and when it finally settles on slightly wary but not uninterested, Tony is grinning.
"Yes," Loki says finally. "I suppose you do."
"Right. Let me take a shower first, though. I'll meet you upstairs?"
Loki nods. "Yes. Take your time."
Tony flashes a last grin at him before he flees into the elevator, where he takes a few seconds to get adjusted to insanity, because obviously he’s lost his mind completely now.
x
Loki looks entirely out of place, sitting at Tony’s bar in loose pants and some kind of tunic and looking around the penthouse with vague interest. He seems more relaxed than Tony has ever seen him and somehow that’s a little weird, because Loki is not exactly the most social person. Tony expected him to be tense and also an asshole for at least the first few drinks.
“I guess you’re not the beer type,” Tony said, trying to go for ‘light and cheery’ instead of ‘confused and possibly suicidal’. Really, inviting Loki for a drink, what was he even thinking?
Nothing. He was thinking nothing, because he wasn’t thinking at all. Damn his genius brain for stopping to work exactly then when its services are needed the most.
“No,” Loki says, having the absolute gall to sound amused. “Not really.”
“Whiskey or wine?”
“Wine. Red, if you have it.”
“What do you think I am, some kind of amateur?” Tony chooses a bottle and opens it, scoffing. “I’ve got some red wines here that are twice as old as me.”
He pours Loki a glass and places it in front of him. Loki is smirking by now, and he seems rather pleased when he takes a closer look at the bottle.
“One of your best drinks then, isn’t it? Should I be flattered?”
“Yes, sure” Tony says, resting his arms on the bar. “Be flattered.”
“Do you not want any?”
Tony stares at him. “What?”
Loki’s amusement seems to grow with every second that passes. “Wine, Stark. Do you not want any?”
Tony keeps staring at him. Did he really forget to pour himself a drink? Apparently, yes. Shit.
“Drinking this alone would be a waste of an excellent wine,” Loki added. “So how about a second glass, hm?”
So, Tony usually isn’t much of a wine drinker, but Loki is sort of right, and also having a glass too makes it easier to ignore that he basically opened the best and most expensive wine bottle he owns just for Loki, who hadn’t even asked anything of him except a “red wine, if you have it”. Shit, again.
Anyway, he’s already procured a second glass and given it to Loki, and Loki fills it with wine in a way that’s much more elegant than it has any right to be, which may or may not be a biased opinion founded on Tony’s obsession with Loki’s hands.
Tony doesn’t thank him. This is still his own wine, for fuck’s sake.
He sits down next to Loki on a bar stool, because that makes him feel a bit more like they are on eye-level, and watches as Loki takes a first sip of the wine.
“This is very nice,” Loki says, his voice unusually warm.
Tony tries not to be pleased by how pleased Loki is. “Duh. ‘Course it is. You won’t find a drink in this tower that isn’t very nice. ”
“There is a vending machine on the eighteenth floor,” Loki says thoughtfully. “I heard it only spat out Jicama juice last week.”
“You heard, huh?”
“Yes.”
“You didn’t have anything to do with it.”
“Of course not,” Loki says, and to match his innocent tone he widens his eyes. “Why would I do something like that?”
Tony snorts a laugh - yeah, scratch that, Loki's definitely an asshole - and finally takes his glass. The wine really is very good. “I mean, I’m not gonna lie - I watched the security footage, the faces were the funniest thing I’d seen all week.”
“Oh?” Loki grins; a sharp and pleased thing that would be very good at making Tony shiver if he let it. “I would like to see that footage, I think.”
So Tony has JARVIS pull up a screen, and they spend the next hour laughing about the weird faces people make when they involuntarily try Jicama juice for the first time in their lives. In between laughing, conversation flows easily - they are both good talkers, after all, and they do have a few things in common. (Mainly sass and sarcasm, but that still counts, right?)
In the end, Loki stays for about three hours, and the wine bottle is empty when he leaves.
x
Tony didn’t actually want it to turn into a reoccurring thing. Or well, scratch that, what he wants and doesn’t want shouldn’t be a part of the equation, this is about what he planned. He didn’t actually plan on it becoming a reoccurring thing. Then again, he didn’t really plan it all, and he didn’t really tell himself that it couldn’t happen again, either. And, anyway, what is he supposed to do when Loki shows up in the penthouse one evening, with a bottle of some sort of elvish (???) drink and a smile on his face that’s far too charming for anyone’s good? Turn him away?
Yeah, right.
So it happens again, and then a few nights later it happens again, and after a few weeks Loki knows where the bathroom is and where to find cups and tea bags in Tony’s kitchen. Tony isn’t sure how that happened, and he isn’t sure if he likes it, but now this is a thing they just do, and they will keep doing it because it’s much too nice to stop doing it.
The problem is this: they’re both a bit lonely, although they would never admit it, and also this is very easy. It’s easy and surprisingly comfortable and also - well, it’s just fun. Tony can’t remember the last time he really enjoyed talking to somebody, because even with Rhodey and Pepper it feels sometimes like they don’t really understand what the other is saying.
Loki understands Tony when he isn’t even saying anything.
“I didn’t think you would ask me,” he says one evening - or one night, really; the sun sunk hours ago.
Tony only reluctantly opens his eyes. They are sitting on the sofa, and apparently he is now comfortable enough in Loki’s company to almost fall asleep. (But don’t read too much into that; he hasn’t slept properly in like three days now.)
“I didn’t ask you anything,” he says around a yawn. “Or did I?”
“Not now,” Loki says. He has claimed the corner of the sofa for himself, and he sits there cross-legged and barefooted, as if he belongs there. “I didn’t think you would ever offer me a drink.” He looks down at his glass, tracing its rim with his fingertip. Tony realizes it’s empty. “And ask me to come here.”
“More wine?” Tony asks.
Loki smiles and places his glass on the sofa table. Tony takes it and brings it back to the bar for a refill. He isn't sure what to think about Loki's words, and the more he does think about them, the weirder they seem. Well, not weird weird, just - possibly a reason to be nervous weird.
“I didn't think I would, either,” he says as he brings the full glass back to the sofa.
Loki raises a brow.
“Offer you a drink,” Tony says, doing just that, “and ask you to come here.”
Loki takes the glass, but his gaze follows Tony when he sits down again. “It did take you a long time.”
“Did it?”
“Please. You've been watching me for months.”
“You've been watching me for months,” Tony shoots back. “You could've asked, too, you know.”
“I could have,” Loki agrees, swirling the wind around in the glass. “But I enjoy watching you. Especially when you are watching me.”
Tony huffs, but otherwise stays silent. He grabs his own drink - scotch, this time - and avoids Loki's eyes. This is flirting, right? Which. Uh. It's fine? He guesses it's fine. It's normal, sort of, because they've been flirting pretty much since the first time they talked and didn't stop doing so when drinks and movies came into the picture. And usually Tony enjoys it, he enjoys it a lot, but where Loki is going with this also freaks him out.
“You enjoy watching me,” Loki continues, unfairly calm. “My hands in particular, I think. You also enjoy serving me drinks and dinner, and letting me choose the movie. You enjoy making sure that I have everything I want. You like it when I -”
“Yes, alright, I get it,” Tony snaps. “No need to spell it out like that, jesus.”
Loki blinks, and then he frowns. He doesn't look away, but soon Tony does. He shifts on the sofa, not sure what to do with himself, and stares into his glass.
“Forgive me,” Loki says eventually, his tone hesitant. “I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.”
Tony clenches his teeth. “Why is this such a big deal all of a sudden? You never even -”
He cuts himself off, because he doesn't even really know what to say. It's not like he's been waiting for Loki to make a move or anything, but well. It's also not like he hasn't been waiting for Loki to make a move.
“You are a submissive, aren't you?” Loki asks, still careful.
Tony glares at him. “Yeah, so what? That doesn't mean you can just - have me.”
“Of course not,” Loki says at once. He seems very tense now and he's watching Tony so closely that it gives him fucking goosebumps. “I merely thought you might... like me to. If I misinterpreted -”
“Fuck, no,” Tony says. He sets his glass aside and rubs his eyes, feeling exhausted and keyed up all at once. “No, you didn't. I -”
He stops himself again.
“Yes?” Loki prompts after a moment.
“I just - I'm really not - you know. Good at this.”
Suddenly, Loki just seems confused. “I'm sorry?”
Tony takes his glass again and stands up. It's still his first drink tonight; lately he's found that he doesn't like being drunk in Loki's presence. (Not because he's not comfortable, but because he's too comfortable. Also he doesn't want to miss anything.) He goes to refill it even though it's still half full just to have something to do, and maybe to bring a bit of distance between himself and Loki. They've been hanging around enough that Tony has gotten at least somewhat used to Loki's, well, his dom-ness , but it still sets him on edge sometimes. He knows that Loki will not accept this without an explanation - oh, sure, maybe he would never mention again if Tony asked him to, but he wouldn't stop thinking about it and trying to figure it out, and that would just ruin everything. This will ruin everything too, though. Things like this never end well when Tony tries them.
“If you want a sub," he says, feeling a little safer standing behind the bar, “you should go and find somebody else. I'm sure people would throw themselves at you, you just have to -”
“I see no reason to let them,” Loki replies. Then, “Come here, please.”
It's not an order. Not because there is a please, but because of the tone Loki uses - polite and unassuming, almost questioning. It still makes Tony swallow thickly. He leaves his glass on the bar and returns to the sofa, sitting down on it heavily.
“Contrary to popular belief, I can’t read minds,” Loki says after a moment. “So if you would be so kind to tell me what you are thinking, I'd be very thankful.”
“Get in line,” Tony says. “I'm still waiting for my brain to tell me what it's thinking.”
“I see,” Loki says. “Take your time.”
Take your time. That’s what Loki said before they had drinks for the first time. Even then Tony already asked for permission, although not consciously. It makes him feel a little sick now.
“I haven't done anything like this in ages,” he says finally, not looking at Loki.
"Me neither," Loki says, carefully. "But I'm willing to try, anyway."
Tony slowly shakes his head. “I'm just not good at it.”
“At submitting?” Loki asks, still sounding confused.
Tony just lifts his shoulders, not knowing what else to say. He doesn't know how to put this into words, has never tried that before. It's just what he learned in every relationship he had - or, well, in the one relationship and dozens of short-term fuckbuddies that he had. It always ends with doms trying to mold him into something he just isn't and will never be. It's not their fault - no dom would like having a sub who ignores everything they say and goes on a week-long inventing binge instead. Tony gets that. They have to be in control, that's the whole point, and Tony is uncontrollable in so many aspects that there just isn't a point . It didn't even work out with Pepper, and he really loved her.
“I really don't understand, I'm afraid,” Loki says, apparently unwilling to just let the topic go. “I know you have a hard time following orders, but I assure you, that's a problem I know how to handle.”
Tony shakes his head again. “That's not it. I don't -” He sighs. “I don't mind following orders. It's fun. But I - I just can't stand it when someone thinks I need to be given orders to get my life in order. And everybody always thinks that.”
Loki was quiet for a while. “Stark,” he said then, “do you really think I would try to change your chaotic way of living?”
He sounds so insulted that it startles a laugh out of Tony. He dares to look at Loki and finds him smiling, and Tony can't help but grin himself. “No, you'd probably make it more chaotic.”
“Yes,” Loki says, satisfied.
Tony looks at him for a moment longer, sobering quickly. “Still.”
He doesn't elaborate, but it looks like Loki doesn't need him to. “I know that these things are handled very differently here on Earth,” he says, “but I also know that everyone submits differently, just like everyone dominates differently. If anybody told you that you are a bad sub because you didn’t want to accept all the rules they gave you, then they were simply not the right dom for you.”
Tony snorts. “What, and you are?”
“Well.” Loki raises a brow. “You could give me a chance and find out if I am.”
Tony stares, but soon yanks his eyes away to look at his own hands. “I don't know. Maybe.”
“It's your decision,” Loki says. “I am - content with just this, too.”
Content, Tony realizes, is not the same as happy.
x
Loki chooses another movie they can watch, and he also points out that they both didn't have anything for dinner yet, so Tony has JARVIS order something.
He doesn't taste the food, not really, and he doesn't watch the movie, either. And he knows that Loki knows that. The god is quiet himself, and he sits a little bit closer to Tony than he usually would. Tony can almost feel the warmth of Loki's thigh pressed against his own, but there are still a few inches of air in the way. Maybe, if they hadn't just had the conversation they had, Tony would just climb into Loki's lap and kiss him senseless like he has thought about countless times by now, but he can't bring himself to do that now. He wishes that they had never even talked about this at all, then he could do something rash and stupid and act like he hasn't thought about the consequences. Since when do they talk about anything like reasonable adults, anyway? Talking makes anything so much more difficult.
He wonders how much it would take to get Loki to jump him. Tony's done that before, when he was younger; actually it was his go-to method when he wanted to hook up with some pretty dom. Act like a lost sub and some dom will pick you up, and while they might be idiots, they're good enough for a few hours. He's sure he could still pull it off, the whole submissive shtick - but well, this is Loki, and Loki probably won't be impressed by shy smiles and downcast gazes, not when they are faked.
What would impress him, though? Tony doesn't have much else to offer right now. Hell, maybe he can't even have a proper session anymore, what with the arc reactor in his chest and all. And the panic attacks. The panic attacks might be a problem, too.
The movie comes to an end. Tony only notices because Loki sits up properly and stretches and god, he probably does that on purpose. No, he definitely does that on purpose, Tony thinks while he not so subtly watches Loki’s shirt slide up. Loki doesn’t ever show any skin, all his shirts are high-collared and long-sleeved, and damn him, but Tony’s desperate to see more. He bets he could make Loki fall apart if he let him - Loki already wants him, that much is clear, and Tony knows that he would have Loki wrapped around his little finger in no time at all. A few minutes on his knees, that’s probably all it would take. (That’s another problem right there - He can’t just relax, he’ll always try to keep at least some control, some leverage. Getting doms to do what he wants even while he’s the one kneeling, Tony is very good at that. Some people think he’s a switch or even a dom because of that, but in truth he’s just obsessively paranoid.)
“I’ll take my leave now, I think,” Loki says when the credits have been rolling for a minute already, his eyes on Tony.
Tony grins at him, and he hopes it looks like his usual grin, or at least like a grin that doesn’t say I’m a mess and you’ll regret it, but for the love of god, take me apart. “Yes, sure. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
(Obsessively paranoid, but also pathetically needy.)
“Of course,” Loki says.
He kisses Tony’s cheek before he stands up and leaves, and Tony realizes about a second too late that Loki just fucking kissed his cheek, and then he spends another second freaking out about because come on, that’s just entirely unfair and if they start kissing cheeks now, they’ve already given in. Tony’s chest feels so full all of a sudden and he doesn’t know what to do with own body except haul it over the backrest of the sofa and make it crash into Loki, who somehow manages to look surprised and smug at the same time. Tony kisses him, grabbing fistfuls of Loki’s shirt to pull him down, and Loki kisses back like he’s been waiting for this for weeks.
And, well. Perhaps he has.
This is very rash, Tony thinks absently, and it’s also very stupid. But to hell with it, Loki is an excellent kisser, and he takes control of the kiss even more excellently. He slows it down and softens it, fingers digging into Tony’s sides so hard that it’s on the edge of hurting, and he manages to make Tony walk backwards without even letting him notice. But then Tony’s back hits the sofa and he realizes that, yes, they’re definitely kissing, this is a Thing now - a Thing he won’t survive if Loki does everything as intensively as he kisses, but well. You’ve got to make some sacrifices.
It’s Loki who breaks the kiss, giving Tony time to breathe. Tony gulps for air while Loki watches him, thumbs rubbing gentle circles into the skin above Tony’s hip bones. Well, Tony’s shirt is still in the way, but the touch is soothing nonetheless.
“Spontaneous,” Loki murmurs, his voice low and amused. “I like it.”
Tony has to laugh. He can’t help it. It bubbles up in his chest and crawls up his throat, and then he is giggling. “This is - insane, I -”
Loki watches him for a moment longer, then he says, “Hush.”
Tony tries his best to shut up, but it takes a few seconds. And then he hiccups, because the universe hates him and gave him the hiccups so that he can be properly embarrassed. “Fuck.”
“I said hush,” Loki says, and then he kisses Tony again.
He keeps it brief and gentle, this time, and when he pulls away again, at least the hiccups are gone. Tony’s breaths are a little more even, too, and thankfully he’s not giggling anymore. He still feels a little dizzy, though.
Loki’s hand comes up to cup Tony’s face. He holds Tony’s gaze while his thumb traces the line of his jaw, slowly and intently, as if he needs to concentrate on what he’s doing. As if he wants to concentrate on what he’s doing. As if -
Fuck.
As if there’s nothing else right now.
“Loki,” Tony says, breathless. “I -”
“I am not going to say it a third time,” Loki says.
His voice is quiet, but there is a warning note in it that makes Tony’s mouth snap shut. He’s forgotten what he wanted to say, anyway.
Loki’s eyes are dark, the look in them pleased. “Good.”
Tony swallows thickly. He stares at Loki, frozen in place. He doesn’t dare to move. Loki taps the underside of Tony’s chin twice, then a third time when Tony doesn’t immediately lift it. Then Tony understands and obeys, and he stops breathing altogether when he feels Loki’s fingertip wander from Tony’s chin over his Adam’s apple all the way down to his jugular. Loki’s nail on his skin shouldn’t feel so good, but it does.
“Keep breathing,” Loki orders. “And look at me.”
Tony forces air into his lungs and looks into Loki’s eyes again. He feels like his knees are going to give in every second now. Or like he’ll faint completely. Hell, maybe he’s just going to die on the spot.
“Would you like to sit down?”
Tony shakes his head, and Loki accepts it for now. His hand is resting on the side of Tony’s neck now, his other one is still holding Tony’s hip. He’s so close that Tony can smell him and his eyes are ruthlessly gentle, almost too much to handle. Tony has never seen Loki look at anything like that and it’s overwhelming, and it also makes him remember that he’s in far too deep already.
“I do not want you to be anything you don’t want to be,” Loki says, slowly and firmly. “Is that clear?”
Tony blinks. “Uh. Yes.”
“Yes...?”
God, Tony has always hated the whole “proper form of address” thing. He never managed to take it seriously, and remembers quite vividly that the reason for most of the punishments his ever-changing doms gave him was that he’d drawled an insincere sir or master at them. He’s always had some issues with respect.
“What do you want to hear?” he asks, annoyed. “I can do sir , or -”
“I have a name,” Loki says. “You may use it.”
“Oh.”
“So?”
“Yes, Loki,” Tony says hesitantly. “It’s clear.”
“Good.” Loki rewards him with another brief kiss. “If I ever misstep, you are to tell me immediately. Also clear?”
“Yes, Loki.”
“Do you have a safeword?”
Tony stares at him. He didn’t expect Loki to pay any attention to Earthly customs regarding this. Tony has no real idea how it works on Asgard, but Loki did tell him that they basically aren’t any actual rules at all. Which is a tiny bit worrying. “You - you know what a safeword is?”
“Of course I know what a safeword is,” Loki says with a sigh. “I spent many nights doing research about how these things are handled here.”
“Research, huh?” Tony says, grinning faintly.
“Oh, hush.”
“Now you did say it a third time.”
“And somehow you are still talking.”
“I talk when I’m nervous; that’s nothing I can just - switch off. Deal with it.”
To his surprise, Loki didn’t seem annoyed by Tony’s glare and sharpening tone. Instead his eyes softened. “That may be adorable, but there really is no reason to be nervous. And I’ll deal with it gladly.”
Tony bristles. “It’s not adorable.”
“No?” Loki leans in to kiss Tony’s cheek, letting the touch linger. “I think it is. I also think it’s lovely that your brain can’t seem to stop working, although I would like to find out how much it takes to change that.”
Tony would like to find that out, too. Very much. It also scares him to death, but he's been scared to death ever since he flew into a wormhole two years ago, so it's nothing new.
“Yes,” he manages to say. “Alright.”
What is still new is this: Loki's lips on his, his tongue in Tony's mouth. It's not a gentle kiss, it's not a careful kiss, but as far Tony is concerned it's a perfect kiss. It has him holding onto the backrest of the sofa for support, because his legs seem to have more and more trouble holding him up. Loki is kissing him as if he has nothing else planned for the rest of their lives, and that's the sort of thing that freaks Tony out, but apparently it's also the sort of thing he adores, because it feels so good.
He still needs air, though. Air is important. Loki gives it to him, and Tony's so far gone that he almost thanks him - for the kiss or the air, maybe for both, he has no idea. He's panting, and Loki's smug little smile drives him insane. He can feel that Loki is hard; his cock presses very insistently against Tony's stomach.
The only thing Tony wants right now is to get on his knees.
“Are you -,” he gets out, “are you just going to kiss me the whole night? Or -”
“I will kiss you when I want,” Loki says, “and as long as I want. And you will let me.”
Tony has to press his lips together to keep from making an undignified sound. Loki sounds so calm, he's not even out of breath. But there is a warning note in his voice, more than just a hint of darkness in his eyes, and Tony already can't get enough of it.
“Yes, Loki,” he says, dutifully, and god he hates it when his voice sound all soft and docile, but fine. Fine. There's nothing he can do about it now.
“You still haven't answered my question.”
Tony really tries to remember what question he's been asked, but he just ends up staring at Loki's mouth. “Er.”
“Your safeword, pet,” Loki says, his tone dry but still patient.
Pet. Oh god.
Tony swallows. Safewords. Loki asked him question about safewords. Tony does have one, technically - the one he used with Pepper -, but he wouldn't be comfortable using it, so he says, “Red?”
“Red it is,” Loki says, smiling. He is touching Tony's face again, his thumb on Tony's lower lip.
Tony has to resist the urge to open his mouth and suck at it. He wants to feel Loki’s fingers on him and inside him, wants to know how they feel and taste, how gentle and how rough they can be. Loki’s damned hands are going to be the death of him.
“You’re blushing,” Loki says, fascinated and amused and satisfied all at once.
There’s no point in denying it. Tony can feel it himself, the arousal and embarrassment coloring his cheeks. “Yeah, no shit.”
Loki smirks at him. His hand wanders lower, down Tony’s throat again until it reaches his chest. Tony holds his breath, Loki’s fingers so close to the arc reactor make him damn uneasy, but Loki makes no move to touch it. He lets his hand rest right next to the reactor on Tony’s chest. Tony tries to look down again, but immediately Loki takes hold of Tony’s chin with his other hand and lifts it up, keeping him from looking away.
“I can hear your heartbeat,” Loki says, like that’s a normal thing to say. Like it doesn’t make Tony remember every single moment his heart skipped a beat or started hammering when he was in any way close to Loki. “Are you scared?”
Tony can’t lie to him. He just can’t do it. “A - a bit, yeah.”
Loki looks at him, and for the first time he seems uncertain. “Of me?”
Tony shakes his head at once. “No, Loki.”
“Good,” Loki says, relief scurrying over his face before his smirk returns. “Now. I think I want you to put your mouth to good use. Would you like to -”
Tony’s brain just gives up, and his knees give in. His kneecaps hate him for dropping down on them so suddenly, but the discomfort makes it a bit easier to focus and keep his hands from reaching for Loki’s pants. He hasn’t been given permission yet, so he digs his fingers into his thighs and looks up at Loki, waiting.
“Well,” Loki breathes. “Aren’t you lovely?” His hand is in Tony’s hair, tilting his head back. “Being on your knees for me suits you, pet.”
The thing is this. Tony may be bad at being a whole-time sub, but he’s not bad at sex. He is definitely not bad at sex, and he knows it just like he knows that he looks pretty on his knees. He’s played this game a thousand times before, is familiar with the rules, although he does like bending them. Years ago, before Afghanistan, he could go under easily when he was with the right dom, and he has never minded kneeling for someone if it pleases them. He’s crawled for people and licked their boots and let them call him all kinds of things, and he enjoyed it all - but never for the right reasons, not really.
It was about pleasing the doms, sure. It’s always about pleasing the doms. But with Tony, it was also about proving something - to make sure that they would never forget how good he’d been for them, not even when they couldn’t stand having him around for longer than a few hours. Tony would have done everything they asked, and later he’d walk away with a sore ass and a smirk, knowing that he’d ruined another dom for everyone else.
But he has never cared much for kneeling or boot-licking or name-calling, not really. He gets off on it, but he has heard other subs talking about how they never feel more at home, more like themselves than when they are kneeling at their dom’s feet. Meanwhile, Tony would prefer being in his workshop over being on his knees anytime.
This, though? This feels oddly right. It's Loki, after all - Loki, who treats everybody else with scorn and sharpness, but looks down at Tony now as if he's never seen anything better. Loki, who listens to Tony no matter if they are on the battlefield at noon or in the penthouse at midnight, who likes listening to Tony even when he's rambling about absolute nonsense. Loki, who looked so very out of place that evening he sat at Tony's bar for the first time, but now spends more time in the penthouse than on his own floor, because he feels safe here.
Tony wants that. He wants to make Loki feel safe, and he wants to make Loki happy, and kneeling for him is everything he's ever wanted. He feels so very warm, and Loki’s praise threatens to make him lightheaded. He’s scared of getting lost in it.
“Thank you, Loki,” he says, after a too long pause, and catches himself meaning it just a little too much. He’s thankful that Loki lets him kneel for him, as if kneeling for him is a privilege. An honor. And, fuck -
It is.
“You are most welcome,” Loki says, a knowing look in his eyes. “Go ahead, then.”
Tony doesn’t need to be told twice. He pulls Loki’s pants down all the way to his ankles, sucking in a sharp breath when he realizes that Loki isn’t wearing any underwear. His cock is long and hard; swallowing it completely will be a challenge. Tony always enjoys a good challenge.
He glances up at Loki, who nods. His eyes are dark and wide, red lips parted. He’s a fucking vision, and Tony adores him so much that it hurts. Loki’s hand is still on the back of Tony’s head, holding a fistful of his hair without tugging at it. The possibility is there, though, and Tony wants to make Loki’s grip tighten until hurts, wants to make him tug and tear and push and then come down Tony’s throat.
Tony puts his hand on Loki’s thighs. The skin is warm and soft under his palms, the muscles beneath it strong. Tony presses his fingertips into the flesh and finally leans forward to nuzzle Loki’s thigh, the curve of his hip bone. Loki hums above him, spreading his legs a little to give Tony better access. He lets Tony take his time. His fingers are massaging Tony’s scalp, gently and almost thoughtlessly, as if Loki isn’t even aware that he’s doing it.
When Tony touches Loki’s cock for the first time, the grip on his hair immediately tightens. He’d smirk if he wasn’t so busy gasping, and Loki seems to get the message. He keeps his hold on Tony’s hair tight and pulls Tony closer, right to where he wants him the most. Tony doesn’t waste any time. He closes his lips around the head of Loki’s cock, pressing his tongue against the underside, and relishes the hiss Loki lets out. Tony wants to hear more of those sounds, he wants to find out how he can make Loki moan.
Taking his cock deeper and swallowing around it does the trick; Loki moans and pushes his hips forward, almost making Tony gag. It’s more surprise than anything else, and then there’s just satisfaction and the need for more, so Tony holds onto Loki’s thighs and starts sucking him in earnest, until Loki can’t keep his hips from bucking anymore, until he’s tugging at Tony’s hair and all but fucking Tony’s mouth, just like Tony wanted.
Loki losing control is a glorious thing, and Tony’s already addicted.
Loki gasps out a warning just seconds before he comes, but Tony just grips his thighs tighter and takes Loki’s cock as deep as he can. Loki lets out a sound that will haunt Tony’s fucking dreams, a strangled groan fading into a whimper , hips twitching as his come hits the back of Tony’s throat.
Tony slowly pulls back as soon as Loki lets him, gasping for air. His vision is a little blurry. He squeezes his eyes shut, forehead dropping against Loki’s thigh, and tries to catch his breath. His hands are still holding Loki’s legs, and he has to force them to stay there instead of reaching into his own pants to get himself off. He can’t remember ever being this hard and aching before.
“What do you want, Anthony?”
The question is asked quietly and gently, but it still has Tony making a sound that’s very nearly a whine. Fuck, Anthony is almost worse (better) than pet. He doesn’t know what he wants, except that he wants whatever Loki wants.
“Please,” Tony manages, his voice wrecked. His throat is sore. “Please-”
“You may touch yourself,” Loki decides, “but only if you look at me.”
Tony takes a few shaking breaths, but eventually he lifts his head and looks up at Loki, who seems satisfied. He runs his fingers through Tony’s hair and nods, and then Tony’s already grabbing himself through his sweats and moaning at the feeling.
“No,” Loki says. “Do it properly. You’ve earned it.”
Tony barely even suppresses his answering whimper and fumbles to pull his pants down enough to free his cock. He starts stroking himself roughly, and even though it’s a little dry and even though it’s not Loki’s hand it’s good, it’s so good that he can’t hold Loki’s gaze.
Loki doesn’t let him look away. He’s cupping Tony’s jaw again and tilts his head back up, so hard that it almost hurts. Tony grunts, hand speeding up even though looking into Loki’s eyes when they are so absolutely focused on him is far too fucking much right now.
Loki’s smirk is going to ruin Tony’s life.
“Do you like a bit of pain, pet?” he asks, and his voice is even worse than his smirk, worse than his eyes and his hands. It’s low and dark, but a little hoarse now, and what he is offering nearly makes Tony come right then and there.
Tony nods rapidly, doesn't manage anything else. But it’s enough - he feels Loki’s nails digging into his cheek at first, and then Loki slaps him hard across the face. It stings so much and so good that it almost overshadows Tony’s orgasm. He comes all over himself and the floor, gasping, and then -
Then his stomach plummets. His gasp turns into a sob and he doesn’t want to be kneeling anymore, but his fucking legs won’t move and everything is so hazy, and he doesn’t know what to do. Loki makes a distressed sound and just picks Tony up, as if he weighs nothing.
He carries Tony around the sofa and then lies down, Tony on top of him. By now Tony is clinging to him with trembling hands, face pressed into Loki’s chest, his breaths erratic. Loki wraps his arms around him and just holds him, doesn’t even say anything until Tony calms down at least a little.
Loki’s body is warm underneath his own, and Tony can hear his steady heartbeat. And eventually that’s enough - the panic and the shame start to fade, and even then Loki doesn’t let go of him. He keeps Tony close.
Tony starts to apologize as soon as he can speak again.
“Shh,” Loki interrupts. Tony hasn’t even said two words. “None of that. You did nothing wrong.”
Tony lets out a shaking breath. He doesn’t dare to open his eyes, not yet, and he doesn’t know what to say.
“Was the slap too much?” Loki asks, so gently, and already so contrite, as if he is about to apologize now.
Tony shakes his head as well as he can in his position, and finally manages to speak. “No, no. It was - good. Very. I just - I -”
“I understand,” Loki says, stroking Tony’s back. “You don’t need to explain. Just rest for a while, hm? Are you comfortable?”
“Don’t get up,” Tony says, weakly, and buries his fingers in Loki’s shirt to keep him exactly where he is.
“I wouldn’t dare,” Loki promises warmly. “Come here.”
Tony lets Loki pull him up a little, until he can bury his face against Loki’s shoulder. Loki keeps rubbing Tony’s back and turns his head, pressing his lips to Tony’s hair.
“You were so good for me, love,” he murmurs. “I'm very proud of you.”
Tony almost starts crying again. He sighs and keeps hiding his face, and Loki chuckles softly. He continues muttering sweet nothings that mean just about everything to Tony, until he falls asleep.
x
Tony wakes up before Loki, after not even three hours. He feels really fucking good, at least until the memories come back, and then he isn’t sure how he feels anymore. Still good, in a way, but also a little like he’s going to be sick. He wonders how long it will take until Loki decides that this isn’t what he wants.
Tony carefully sits up. He doesn’t want to wake Loki, but there’s no real reason to worry about that, because apparently Loki sleeps like a stone after sex. He doesn’t even stir. Tony looks at him for a moment, stunned, and before he stands up he kisses Loki’s cheek.
He goes to change into new clothes, and then he takes the elevator down to the workshop.
He's been working for about half an hour when JARVIS says, "Sir, Mr. Liesmith would like to see you."
Fuck.
Tony grits his teeth. "What does he want?"
"It seems like he wants to bring you a coffee."
Tony nearly drops his tool. "He what?"
If JARVIS could sigh, then he would do it now. "He's waiting, sir. What should I tell him?"
What the hell.
"Uh. Tell him he can come here?"
JARVIS doesn't reply, but Tony knows that the AI will deliver the message. And sure enough, just a second later Loki appears out of nowhere right next to Tony, a mug in his hands.
"Hello," he says. "Are you alright?"
It's possible that Tony is still dreaming. Or maybe he's hallucinating. How do you recognize a hallucination?
"Anthony?"
"Er," Tony says. "Yeah. I'm fine."
Loki studies him for a moment, then he nods and smiles. "Good." He places the mug on the desk and leans in to kiss the top of Tony's head. "Please call me if you need anything. Yes?"
"Yes," Tony agrees slowly. "Okay."
Loki cards his fingers through Tony's hair one last time before he straightens again, and all of a sudden Tony is so scared that Loki will leave that he grabs Loki's shirt.
Loki looks down at Tony's hand, then into his eyes. He raises a brow. "Yes?"
Tony stares at him. "That's it?"
Loki blinks. "What do you mean?"
"It's three am," Tony says. "I'm working."
Loki nods very slowly and throws a pointed look at Tony's desk. "I can see that."
"You're not going to punish me?"
"I didn't plan to," Loki says lightly. "But if you want one, I'll gladly provide."
This must be some sort of parallel universe. An alternative timeline. A trap?
Tony frowns. "You're not going to order me to come to bed with you?"
"You may come to bed with me if you'd like," Loki says. "Always. But I thought you were working?"
"I am."
"Do you want to keep working?"
"Yes?"
"Then I see no reason to stop you." Loki actually winks at him. Fucking winks at him. "I might ask you to take a nap some time tomorrow, though."
Tony gapes at him for a long time. Eventually, Loki chuckles and takes Tony's hand, lifting it up to his own lips.
"I'll be in the penthouse, if you need me," he says, and then he turns around and walks away, apparently planning to take the elevator now.
"It's my penthouse," Tony calls after him.
"Do you have anything against me staying in your penthouse, pet?"
"No. But don't snoop around."
The last thing Tony sees before the elevator door closes is Loki rolling his eyes.
He keeps staring for a second, then he shakes his head and turns back to his work. The coffee Loki made is very good.
x
Later, Tony finds Loki on the sofa in front of the TV, sound asleep. The sun has just started to rise, its light falls to the windows. Tony looks down at Loki for a second, then he gives him a nudge.
It takes two more nudges, then Loki blearily opens his eyes. Yup, Tony still adores him.
"Move," he says. "Please."
Loki blinks and nods, already reaching out for Tony. He pulls him down, and not soon after they are huddled up to each other again, Loki's arms firmly around Tony's. It's warm, and nice. And a little odd.
"Loki?" Tony asks, after quite a while.
"Yes?"
"Do you really want to stay?"
"In the penthouse?"
There is a pause, then Tony says, "Yes."
Loki's arms around him tighten. "I'll stay. For as long as you'll have me."
Well, damn.
Tony can't keep from smiling. He's still scared to death, but now he feels like maybe this isn't such a stupid idea, after all.