Chapter Text
Loki lay on the floor of the library, an open book draped over his face in exasperation. It was ambitious to expect any particularly stimulating material to be stored on the Grandmaster’s orgy ship, but he had hoped to find at least one novel not dedicated to graphic descriptions of sexual intercourse.
He was far from an innocent soul but had to admit that he couldn’t even begin to imagine how one could go about performing half the things shown in those books.
On the bright side, Loki was the only person on the ship who ventured into the library at all so he could at the very least expect to be left alone. Until today, it seemed.
“And what have we here?” a mocking voice shot out from the direction of the doorway. Loki heard a slam on the doorway as she grabbed it to swing herself inside, surprised not to hear the characteristic clinking of a bottle that seemed to punctuate her every move.
“Everything was going so well,” he groaned, too brain dead to move.
“Clearly,” Valkyrie said, pursing her lips at Loki sprawled on the floor in casual clothing, surrounded by a sea of neon clad books. His green cloak was off and thrown to the side, leather armor nowhere in sight. It occurred to Loki that this might be the first time she’d seen him without it.
Loki dragged himself up to a sitting position—the book resting on his face making a thump on the floor as it fell—giving his visitor a glare. “Shouldn’t you be vomiting on your sheets by now?”
“If there was any booze left on this god forsaken ship, I absolutely would be,” Valkyrie scowled, throwing a book from a nearby shelf straight at him.
He leaned out of its way, not particularly shocked that this was what his nights had come to. It had been a consistent downhill for a while now. The battle on Asgard was a victory but he felt very little triumph watching the last of Asgard huddle in fear inside a tiny ship in the middle of nowhere.
“Weren’t you a magician at some point?” she mocked. “Not gonna make it disappear or combust mid air, or whatever it is that you mages do?”
“No need, your aim isn’t that great.”
Instead of gutting him like he hoped she would, Valkyrie just sighed and leaned back on the doorframe. “Hiding away, your highness?”
“Just woke up early, wanted something to do,” he lied.
“As if you ever sleep.”
Not much Loki could say to counter that. He grasped for his seidr in hopes of teleporting away but couldn’t quite reach it. Giving up, he indulged whatever this conversation was. “What brings you here? I’m guessing it’s not the literature.”
“Sobriety is boring. And you’re one of the few people who don’t run away from me.”
“I’m not afraid of you.”
“I can fix that,” she shot back. “Kick your ass like I did on that hell planet.” Loki noticed how she avoided saying the planet’s name but didn’t comment on it.
“I wish I was still in the stage of my life where a beating scared me.”
“Oh, relax with that. We're both the trash of this ship, I'm not about to pity you,” Valkyrie said, inviting herself over to sit on the floor across from Loki. Taking a look down the book lying open between them, she smirked. “Nice.”
Looking down to see the image she was referring to, Loki cleared his throat. At least he recognized the anatomy of those two.
“Wanna try it?”
“What?” he choked out, looking at her with wide eyes.
“You heard me.”
“You sure you want to try this exact one?” Loki said, tilting his head at the image. “Looks rather uncomfortable.”
Slamming the book shut with the palm of her hand, Valkyrie leaned over it and held his gaze. “I won’t be the one doing it.”
Loki flushed slightly, opening his mouth and promptly closing it. It was as though he was calculating a couple hundred complex equations at once.
“Don’t worry, we won’t start there,” she said, her dark eyes cutting into his. “So? It’s a simple question, yes or no—no hard feelings. Plenty of other people on this ship.”
“And yet, you came to me.”
“And am more than capable of leaving.”
Loki considered letting her do just that, returning him to the solitude that he’d been enjoying before she so rudely interrupted. Though perhaps “enjoying” was too strong of a word.
“Count me in,” he shrugged. Loki would rather chew glass than tell it to her face, but Valkyrie was rather attractive and he’d be lying to say the thought hadn’t occurred to him.
Valkyrie raised herself off the floor, leaving Loki to think that she had decided to leave after all. That was until she held out her hand, beckoning for him to take it. Narrowing his eyes but taking it anyways—fuck it—he gasped despite himself when Valkyrie pulled him straight up and into her space, their bodies inches away from collision.
“Why are you so much heavier than you look?” she asked.
Loki gave her a sly grin and stepped forward to close the space that remained between them. “I have a lot up my sleeve.”
Valkyrie’s eyes lit up dangerously and she reached up on the balls of her feet, daring him to bridge the final gap.
“As in here right now?” Loki couldn’t help but ask, looking around the library.
“As if we have anyone left to disappoint.”
Too distracted to disagree, Loki figured he might as well. It had been a “screw it” type of day—week—and there was no reason to go about changing that now. A shiver running down his body, Loki finally leaned in, drawing her lips to his.
Turned out that Valkyrie had zero interest in taking things slowly, Loki ending up pinned between her and the bookshelf off to their right before he could even blink. Sucking in a breath as she slightly bit his lower lip, Loki drew back for a moment. “Funny how things ended up, you had me in chains all of a week ago.”
“The two aren’t mutually exclusive,” Valkyrie shot back. He tightened his grasp on her waist as their lips met again, feeling arousal course through him. Given how closely they were pressed against each other, he guessed Valkyrie could feel it as well. She started to take off her shirt Loki went for his, but neither quite completed the action. Catching eye contact, Loki felt relieved to see that she seemed just as uncomfortable at the looming prospect of exhibitionalism as he was.
“My room?” she said, already on her way out.
“Lead the way,” Loki hurried after her, not inclined to waste a second.
“Damn,” she said, dropping back on the bed next to him. They lay side by side, still trying to regain their breath.
“Yeah,” was all he had left in him to say. His voice was dreamy, almost lagging behind his thoughts.
Loki caught himself out of what was clearly about to morph into sleep, figuring Valkyrie would not be particularly impressed with him ending the night by crashing in her quarters. Or morning, they’d lost track of time.
Forcing his eyes open and dragging his feet over the bed, Loki flicked his wrists in an attempt to get dressed the expedient route. He was disappointed but not particularly surprised when nothing happened, air still cold against his bare chest.
Loki wasn’t sure where he was going to go exactly, falling over with sleep but already knowing he wouldn't be able to do so.
“Would you like to want to repeat this?” Loki said, grabbing his pants from where they had been thrown to the floor.
“I’m down,” Valkyrie said plainly, sitting up to watch him. “I might just read a couple of those books you like so much in the meantime. For inspiration.”
“Pretty sure most of those don’t apply to our species,” he said, thankful ‘species’ applied to both plural and singular forms of the word. Valkyrie might be one of the few people left on this ship who didn’t know.
“Uhm,” she mused. “Our.”
He cursed internally, scrambling to maintain a casual tone. “You know?”
“Not exactly a huge secret around here, your highness. I’ve heard you're quite the playwright.”
He crumpled his cloak in his hands, knuckles turning white.
“Calm down,” she said, her voice not missing a beat. “I don’t give a fuck. I’m the last Valkyrior on a ship full of young Asgardians, I’m practically my own species too.”
Loki put on the rest of his clothing in silence, unsure of how to respond. Somehow, there was both a lot and absolutely nothing to say.
Before he could leave, Valkyrie called back to him, “And for the record, all the crap, that was after my time. Frost giants were just another annoying ass warrior race when I was a Valkyrie.”
He slipped out without a word, closing the door softly behind himself. Avoiding his own quarters, Loki drifted aimlessly around the ship, going anywhere except there. With sunrise still a couple of hours away, he figured he might as well test Valkyrie’s claim that there was “no more booze left on this god forsaken ship.”
Loki leaned back on the bed to let her climb on and straddle him through an annoyingly thick layer of clothing.
Noticing it too, Valkyrie frowned. “Why are we still dressed?”
“No clue,” Loki said, reaching forward to unclasp her armor. She put a hand against his chest, pushing him back against the headboard and sitting down on his thighs, all while maintaining piercing eye contact.
“Not so fast, princeling,” Valkyrie said, her tone deep and assertive. “I think it’s time I make you beg for it.”
“You’ve been promising for a week, I’ve yet to see it.”
She leaned in, stopping just as they were about to kiss. “Oh, you will.”
“I'm all for anticipation,” Loki said, internally dying to get on with it. He was confident in his ability to be stubborn but couldn’t deny that Valkyrie wasn’t particularly lacking in that department either.
Just as he placed his hands on her waist, the door to their quarters flew open with a bang.
“Valkyrie, council meeting in 10 minu—
Thor’s announcement was cut short the second he landed his eyes on the scene unfolding in the room. Valkyrie was blocking the upper part of Loki’s body but Loki figured his brother could still tell exactly what he had walked in on. Suddenly, Loki felt grateful that their clothing was still on.
Their eyes met in a moment of joint panic, Loki mentally debating what desolate planet he would promptly be disappearing to. Valkyrie, however, addressed Thor as if nothing unconventional was happening at all. “I’ll be there.”
Loki couldn’t help but be impressed at the sheer abrasiveness with which she went through life.
“You too, brother,” Thor grinned, nodding with approval. “Doesn’t look like you’re gotten far yet anyways.”
“Thor!” Loki yelled, throwing a pillow at him. There was going to be a murder tonight.
Raising his hands in mock surrender, Thor backed up and closed the door on his way out.
“So,” Valkyrie said, sliding off him.
He twisted his neck in annoyance, mixed between embarrassment and unfulfilled desire. "So."
“Was bound to happen eventually,” she shrugged. “It’s a small ship.”
Loki nodded, not thrilled at the thought of his brother seeing him in such a position but having to admit it was hardly the first time. Thor had a way of showing up at the most inconvenient times.
“Fair enough.”
All things considered, it occurred to Loki that he didn’t actually mind their arrangement being public knowledge. Shifting awkwardly, he added, “Maybe it’s for the best."
“What’s for the best?”
“People knowing. I wouldn’t say I’m opposed.”
“It’s just Thor.”
“My brother has many talents,” Loki said, standing up from the bed and offering Valkyrie a hand that she of course did not take. “Keeping his mouth shut is not one of them.”
She ran a hand through her hair, pulling herself up. “I guess I’m not opposed to it either, then.”
Avoiding having to digest the significance of what they’d just agreed upon, the two walked toward the meeting chamber in silence, Valkyrie trudging a couple of steps ahead.
They entered the conference room, taking seats across from each other. Staying as far away from Banner as possible, Loki took the seat next to Thor, receiving a smirk from Valkyrie as she dropped into the spot he had avoided. Heimdall was left by himself at the head of the table.
“Well, well, well, look who has finally graced us with their presence,” Thor teased, toasting them with his cup from his breakfast tray. “You’re lucky none of these meetings are particularly urgent.”
“Our most sincere apologies,” Loki said, narrowing his eyes at Thor. He missed his knives. Though he had to admit, it was nice to have Thor back to his usual crude joking around after weeks of questions and concerned hovering.
“I looked for you in your quarters first, but it appeared as though no one had ever so much as stepped foot in there,” Thor winked. “I see it’s going well.”
“Most certainly is,” Loki said, dodging the implication as best as he could. Eager to change the subject he turned to Heimdall and nodded at the bread roll in the Gatekeeper’s hand. “Heimdall. Somehow, I believe this might be the first time I’ve ever seen you eat.”
“There are many things you’ve yet to see, my prince,” Heimdall responded, taking a bite.
“And I’d rather keep it that way.”
Loki noticed Thor purse his lips at the exchange, probably concerned but not wanting to get involved in whatever that had been about. Thor was a brave warrior, but internal conflicts and backroom politics had never been his forte, especially when it came to his own royal court. Anyone with any prior knowledge would've noticed that Loki and Heimdall's relationship had taken a plummet during the time Loki had spent on the throne, but Thor was likely much to afraid to delve into the matter any further.
“The ship is running out of fuel,” Heimdall said, going straight to it.
“That’s a great observation, but we can all hear the crackling Heimdall,” Thor said before he could stop himself.
“Damn, your majesty,” Valkyrie gave him an impressed slap on the back.
“I’m sorry, that was very rash of me,” Thor dragged a hand down his face in exasperation. “The good thing is, we have enough fuel for three more weeks so we should be able to safely dock on a close-by planet and refuel.”
“Banner, you’re supposed to be smart, can you fix it?” Valkyrie quickly offered, appearing panicked at the idea of docking on a random planet.
Banner just stammered, still intimidated by his alien counterparts. Loki had no doubt that the scientist could tell Loki was afraid of him for the time being but once that fear dissipated, Banner wouldn’t have the Hulk to protect him. “I’m not a mechanical engineer—that’s more Tony’s department—I’m a scientist, I work with radiation.”
“Fuel is just a combination of hydrogen and carbon atoms, is it not?”
“Yes!” The scientist looked up, a surge of excitement coursing through his features at someone using familiar scientific terms. Even if that someone was a menacing supervillain who had no unsuspicious reason to know Earth’s science jargon.
Loki was about to continue but bit back his tongue.
“What is it brother?” Thor asked.
Hesitating for a minute more, Loki said, “Well, a lot of things are composed of hydrocarbons—things that we have. Soap, shoes, clothing. I was meaning to propose that a mage could potentially cast a conversion spell on them but…"
"…You’re the only surviving mage left on the ship,” Heimdall said gravely.
“Yes.”
Bruce looked around with a confused expression, completely lost. “Wait, why can’t you just do it?”
Loki fidgeted with his hands, forcing himself to make eye contact with Bruce. The Midgardian did appear less threatening in his non green form. “Apart from being some of the heaviest forms of dark magic, conversion spells are heat based reactions. For certain biological reasons, that’s never been a strong suit of mine.”
“Plus, your seidr has been kinda non—
Valkyrie started to say something only to cut off with a yelp. Loki gave her a pointed look, drawing his foot back from where it had previously kicked hers under the table. She was about to retaliate when Thor held out a hand.
“Save that for the bedroom, lovebirds.”
Banner stared at Thor, eyes as wide as silver serving plates. Loki almost felt sorry for him, stranded alone on a ship full of immortals of a mythical extraterrestrial culture. He was slowly growing to appreciate Banner’s presence, as it made him feel less like the odd one out.
Eyes darting between Valkyrie and Loki as if he’d just choked on a hunk of metal, Bruce stammered out, “That’s the reason you were late? You’re late all the time—”
“If I hadn’t reminded them, they’d still be there. I’ll have to cleanse my eyes,” Thor said.
Loki was about to combust in annoyance at his brother’s utter lack of social awareness but caught himself. As strange as it sounded, he could hardly blame Thor for trying to segway out of the aforementioned topics of Loki’s biological origin and the ship’s decline. All things considered, Loki and Valkyrie screwing each other was probably the safest topic for them to be treading right now.
Loki hoped Thor had stumbled upon this segway by accident. If he was truly aware enough to take advantage of a conversation so delicately that opened up a whole new side to his brother that Loki wasn’t sure he was ready to accept.
Whatever the case, Loki decided to play along. It had been too long since they had a childish banter that wasn’t about family drama or past grievances. “Hardly the first time, brother.”
“That is true, I will never be able to unsee the Fandral incident.”
“The Fandral incident?” Valkyrie said, gaining interest as soon as she saw that the reference had made Loki blush. “Tell us more.”
“He was a joint friend of ours, though more Loki’s friend than mine as I so abruptly found out one day.”
“It was the day I decided to learn invisibility incantations,” Loki said.
“I’m no magician—so correct me if I’m wrong—but wouldn’t a simple lock on your door have solved that particular issue just as well?” Bruce cut in, his expression innocent much unlike his voice. Valkyrie immediately leaned in to give the scientist a high five.
Heimdall watched them banter in silence, leaving Loki struggling to identify the expression beset upon the Gatekeeper’s face. He expected annoyance, impatience, a lack of interest, but the only emotion he could place resembled nostalgia. For a second he wondered what it must have been like for Heimdall to watch their family get torn apart from the side.
A radiant smile beset upon his face, Thor laughed and waved a hand. "Alright, alright. Let's go back to the problem at hand. It's not ideal but with all other options not being possible so far, it appears that our only option is to refuel on some planet along the way.”
“I agree,” Heimdall stated, giving his opinion for the first time this meeting. The benefit of speaking so sparsely was that when he finally did, everyone was shocked into paying attention.
“Me too,” Banner agreed, plainly.
Everyone’s eyes turned to Loki and Valkyrie, who hesitated to speak. Their opinion probably garnered some interest, given that they were the designated two with the most intimate knowledge of how those “random” planets tended to run.
“Okay,” they said simultaneously. There was hardly any point to stirring an argument when the majority had already spoken.
“That’s settled then,” Thor stated, taking a bite out of a neglected bread roll. “An overall pointless but entertaining meeting, my friends.”
They trickled out of the conference hall, Bruce staying behind to exchange a few words with Heimdall. Loki couldn’t quite overhear what was said before he exited through the door, his brother chasing after him.
“It was nice to mess around with you back there brother, I’ve missed this,” Thor beamed, placing a hand on his shoulder. Not thinking, Loki automatically flinched away, catching himself when it was already too late.
“Yeah, it was” he smiled, trying to act it off. Loki’s heart fell as he watched Thor’s brow reset to its usual place of furrow, the air of lightness that had lit up the conference room only moments ago slipping away as quickly as it had come.
“Felt just like the olden days,” Thor nodded. “But brother, a lot has happened since then. We don’t have to act like it didn’t.”
Alarms screeched all throughout Loki's mind, warning him that they had entered the hazardous territory where Thor might ask the questions that he did not want to so much as think about. Hoping that his autopiloted gurgle of an affirmation was enough, Loki quickly ran off to join the Valkyrie as she rounded the corner ahead.
“Your pride is going to get us killed, princeling,” she said, noticing Loki beside her.
“People don’t need to know my seidr has been a problem, lately. I don’t want Thor thinking I’m helpless.”
“If you told him maybe Thor could transmit you some of his. There isn’t exactly any immediate need for lightning bolts right now.”
“It wouldn’t make any difference, I can’t partake in seidr exchanges,” he said, eyes drifting off in thought for a second. “Learned that particular lesson the hard way.”
She looked at him expectantly.
“In my youth, a girl in my class and I once exchanged seidr out of curiosity. She spent the next three months in the healer’s chambers,” Loki explained. “Jotnar cells must be poisonous to Asgardians, somehow.”
“That’s bullshit.”
“How so?” Loki sounded tired, like she was questioning what he had already thought about a thousand times.
“Seidr is seidr, it’s not like you gave her a kidney,” Valkyrie shrugged. “Plus, it’s an Aesir power form. How’d you even come about yielding it?”
“Frigga shared hers with me.”
“So why in the Universe would Frigg’s seidr hurt an Asgardian girl?”
Loki contorted his mouth as if swallowing a ball of hair. "It wouldn’t.”
“Which means what?”
“Nothing. The fact is that trading seidr with me is lethal hasn’t changed,” he said flatly.
“Whatever. Next time you kick me, I’ll kick you into the next dimension.”
“I’m surprised you haven’t already.”
“So…” she said, lying on her back on the bed, naked body pressed up lightly against his. They’d wasted no time finishing what they’d been so rudely cut off from prior to the meeting. “Fandral. How was he?”
“Oh please, you’re one to talk,” Loki rolled onto his side and slid a hand over her hip, landing a trail of kisses against her collarbone.
“Fair, I suppose you did see her too when you made me relive the memory.”
“I thought she was simply a close friend,” Loki purred innocently.
“Uhm,” Valkyrie said, letting out a laugh despite herself. Motioning for him to go on top, she smirked. “Come here, close friend.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Loki asked, laying beside her. Receiving nothing but a grunt in return, he added, “The whole, me making you see your lover when we fought on that trash planet thing.”
Loki shifted with discomfort, still unsure of how to approach the topic. They had spent a most fun evening together—still working on recovering their breaths—but the incident weighed heavy on the back of his mind.
Valkyrie’s voice was not quite sad as much as just tired. “Not gonna apologize?”
“Would it help?”
“I suppose not,” she sighed. Tilting her head in thought, Valkyrie stared up to the ceiling for a couple of moments. “Can you remember his face?”
“Fandral’s?” Loki asked, blinking in rapid succession. “Yeah, of course I can.”
“Well, until you jolted the memory, I couldn’t remember hers,” Valkyrie said, straining her eyes shut as if attempting to force herself to see a ghost. “I don’t know if it’s all the booze, the pain, or just the sheer extent of time that’s passed since she died.”
“To forget someone’s face though, that’s…”
“I’ve been alive a very long time, princeling,” Valkyrie said, her eyes dangerously empty. “Once you get past a certain age it’s impossible to remember your past, no matter how much you try.”
“Maybe it’s good to forget,” Loki shrugged.
“With forgetting there comes a guilt. The guilt of seeing the love of your life for the first time in centuries and feeling absolutely nothing. And with the guilt, there comes the booze.”
“Would you prefer to feel the pain instead?”
“I don’t fucking know,” Valkyrie said, turning on her side and reaching over him to switch off the light. She dropped her head onto the pillow, arm still draped over Loki.
Clearing his throat, Loki shifted under her. “I should probably go.”
“That reminds me, I meant to ask,” she muttered dreamily, eyes already closed. “Back in the meeting Thor joked no one had ever slept in your assigned quarters cause you spend all your time with me instead, but I know for a fact that you’re not sleeping here. Which begs the question of where do you sleep?”
Loki frowned, he didn’t really have a good answer. “Wherever life takes me.”
“Right,” she murmured. “Why are you so scared of going to your quarters anyways?”
“I have some unsavory memories there, let’s leave it at that.”
She seemed to consider it, deciding not to open the can of worms of what that could possibly mean.
Loki started to rise, placing her arm on the mattress where he had rested a moment before. His body heat reverberated from the spot and hugged her body.
Just as Loki was about to go, she grabbed hesitantly at his wrist. “You can stay if you want.”
He looked down at his lover, weak with longing to slide under the covers beside to her and spend the night in a shared peace. There was every reason to stay, and yet he found himself slipping out into the night anyway.