I just want your extra time (and your kiss)

by ChristinMKay

Summary:

“And here I thought you were popular, Harrington,” Eddie puts on a fake, confident grin once he has put the bottle down. “I expected at least one of those hot dates you keep having to be here.” He manages to keep his leg from bouncing, but his thumb is already rubbing over the damp label on the beer bottle, peeling it off.

“Well none of us are that comfortable with crowds these days,” Steve shrugs. “And honestly, I’d rather just hang out with the people that matter.”

Five times Steve almost kissed Eddie and the one time Eddie beat him to it.

Notes:

I did not expect this fic to happen I woke up this morning at 7 am was possessed by the words and had to write them out.

I have dyslexia and am not a native speaker so apologies for spelling/grammar mistakes. Also, I spent the last two years writing fanfics set in the UK so apologies dear Americans if I used some British terms I'm trying my best.

That's all, enjoy!!

Chapter 1: You don't have to be beautiful

Every fiber of Eddie’s body tells him to run. But he stays, bouncing his leg nervously, twisting his rings for comfort, trying to calm down. He doesn’t run away anymore. Plus, running away in the long, heavy graduation gown might prove to be difficult. 

The queue of students in front of him moves slowly. Name after name they get called up on the stage. Robin gives him a wink when she accepts her diploma. He is glad he is here with her, even though there are so many people between them. 

When the principal reaches the letter C he still reads out Chrissy’s name. She is getting an honorary posthumous diploma. The crowd goes wild, some cheer, some cry. Eddie breaks out into cold sweats. 

He can feel Jason’s eyes on him, burning through his graduation gown. Eddie is already on edge about graduating, he doesn’t need the daggers Jason wishes he could push through Eddie’s pounding heart on him right now. 

Trying to distract himself Eddie looks into the crowd and spots Steve. Of course, Steve is here. Robin is graduating and so are Nancy and Jonathan. And even though Eddie has no illusions that Steve is here for him, he catches Steve looking right back at him. 

He gives Eddie a happy grin and does the small, little wave with his fingers that he always does. Maybe it’s because Eddie is used to people staring at him usually with disgust, throwing finger gestures at him that are far less flattering than a little wave. But for some reason, Steve’s little acknowledgement throws him worse than Jason’s animosity. Eddie has to look away and continues to let his eyes wander. 

He spots Mike with the Wheelers, cheering for Nancy and of course, Will and his mum are here for Jonathan together with Hopper and Eleven. To his surprise, Dustin, Lucas and Max are standing next to the Byers. Neither of them has an older sibling graduating that year, so Eddie wonders why they are here. 

The question is answered when the principal calls his name and the kids erupt into cheers and holler loudly as Eddie steps onto the stage. The rest of the crowd is quiet, shocker. But it makes the kids’ support even sweeter. He is too nervous to look back at Steve, but he can hear Nancy, Robin, and Jonathan cheer from him too. Someone whistles loudly and Eddie knows it’s Wayne. 

His hands are clammy when he accepts his diploma and his legs shake so badly he almost trips. He had had it all planned out. Flip off Principal Higgins, make a scathing comment about the basketball team and pull his demon grimace before jumping off stage, typical Eddie The Freak Munson style. But he can’t do that anymore. Not since Eddie The Freak Munson has become Eddie The Murderer Munson. He is lucky if he makes it out of the ceremony without getting punched in the face. 

Though a punch in the face feels rather trivial after almost dying in the upside down, he doesn’t want Wayne to see him like this. Wayne is standing in the crowd, not far off from Harrington, clapping loudly, his eyes glistening like he might be crying. Eddie gives him a quick nod, before hurrying off stage and before his own eyes can tear up too. 

His heart has barely time to calm down before Robin’s arms fling around his neck while she chants, “We did it, Eddie, we did it!” 

“Just took saving the world and passing Mrs O'Donnell's class,” he grins back at her. “And I'm not sure how I did the last part.”

Robin chuckles and leads him to the place she’s been standing next to Jonathan. Jonathan gives him a clap on the shoulder. They’ve never been friends, not even acquaintances, but they both know what it’s like being pushed into lockers, being at the receiving end of dirty looks and abusive pet names. Jonathan might have gone quiet and tried to disappear while Eddie had decided to become louder, to become more grotesque, if they wanted a freak he would give them one. But still, they share the sentiment of outsiders, happy the worst years of their lives are finally over. 

Together they watch the rest of their classmates walk the stage. Nancy gives a great valedictorian speech and then the whole thing is thankfully over. Eddie is itching to get out of this robe and away from the campus where most people hate his guts and would love to see them displayed on a butcher’s counter. 

He cuts through the crowd, trying to find Wayne, but the kids find him first. 

“Congrats Eddie!” Dustin cheers and tackles him in a hug. 

“Thanks, man,” Eddie grins despite the dirty glances he gets from bystanders, and the tension in the air that threatens to snap any moment like an overstretched rubber band. Eddie just hopes that no one is getting the pitchforks and torches out while the kids are still around. 

“Are we still good for another campaign over the summer?” Mike asks once Dustin has let go of Eddie. 

“One last campaign,” Eddie promises before he slings his arm around Mike’s shoulder. “Then it is your turn to be the savior of the freaks and geeks of this school and run hellfire.” He nods towards Mike’s Hellfire shirt that he and all the other kids are wearing. “Better start making some new ones soon.” 

“What…what if we’re not ready,” Mike whispers with a very unlike Mike insecurity. 

Usually, Mike approaches everything with the painfully obnoxious whining of a teenage boy who thinks he is the first one to suffer from acne and lanky limbs growing out of proportion to the rest of his body. If you asked one of Mike’s friends on a bad day, they’d probably say that being annoying is Mike’s favorite hobby. And while on some days Eddie feels inclined to agree, he sees exactly what Mike is doing. 

Eddie knows a thing or two about protecting yourself by acting obnoxious. He’s basically invented that move. Hell, he even did it to the kids at first, snapping at them in the cafeteria, throwing pretzels at them during lunch, pretending like Hellfire was a more important component of life than breathing oxygen. 

Well, sometimes working on a campaign does feel more important than breathing to Eddie. He has occasionally forgotten to eat or to sleep, too focused on coming up with a new boss fight to make the party's life hell. But he also knows that just because he doesn't, other people still have a life outside of playing DnD. He still deeply regrets the way he handled the whole Lucas situation, despite several apologies. But hey, everything to protect this cool and hardcore persona he had built around himself, right? Only that it had crumbled the second the kids found him traumatized and crying in his dealer’s boat house, clutching a broken bottle first to Steve’s neck and then to his own chest. 

Where Eddie from several months ago would have replied something apathetic about how if Mike doesn’t feel ready, he probably isn’t and doesn’t deserve the spot as the next DM, the Eddie from today smiles softly down at his sheep and prodigies. 

“Would I, Eddie Munson, choose you to carry my legacy if I didn’t think you were ready?” He asks and Mike shakes his head. “It would be my honor to have you kids run Hellfire once the summer is over.” 

That seems to be enough to calm the kids' nerves and they start asking him questions about the summer campaign. Eddie promises to answer them all in good time. Eventually, Mike, Eleven, and Will get called back to their families and Dustin, Lucas and Max say goodbye too. 

Eddie goes back to searching for Wayne and finds him talking to…Steve? 

“Congrats man,” Steve says once Eddie approaches them, beaming like a child on Christmas morning. It’s as pretty as it’s unnerving. “Passing Mrs O'Donnell's class is freaking hard.” 

Just like Jonathan, Steve claps him on the shoulder. In the upside down Steve had pressed his hands on Eddie's bleeding abdomen, yet somehow the friendly touch of his hand on Eddie's shoulder feels more intense. Steve's casual affection still catches Eddie off guard after everything. Steve in general catches him off guard.

When Eddie had woken up in a hospital with a hurting but still beating heart he had been surprised to find the older teenagers sticking around alongside the kids. He had kinda expected for Nancy, Steve, and Robin to drop him. And while Eddie adores the little shrimps, even though he would never admit that out loud, he hadn’t really jumped at the opportunity to befriend the older members of the party either. 

Other than Robin really. But his friendship with Robin makes sense and had become inevitable the second she had clocked his black bandana and he had clocked her…well, everything, but specifically the flustered state Vickie from band was able to reduce her to. 

And he had been perfectly fine being friends with just Robin. He didn’t need to befriend anyone else, thank you very much. Only that they didn’t really leave him a choice in that matter. 

When Nancy had sat down next to him in the cafeteria the first day after spring break, proclaiming she was going to help him study so he could graduate, Eddie had been too terrified to say no. Nancy had guns after all. 

And with Nancy had come Jonathan and with Jonathan had come smoking the occasional joint under the bleachers when Nancy wasn’t trying to force mathematical equations into his head. Eddie still wouldn’t necessarily call himself best buddies for life with Nancy and Jonathan and suggest beading friendship bracelets. But they are closer now. Closer than just traumatized people, bonded by their shared experience of going to hell and back. Hell, if Eddie is honest he actually kinda really likes the two. 

And so for the past few months Eddie had hung out with Robin, studied with Nancy, and smoked with Jonathan. Steve he had avoided. 

Eddie tells himself it’s because he still expects Steve to drop the nice act and the next touch to be a punch in the face. No other reason. Definitely, no other reason.

But even avoiding Steve had been more difficult than anticipated. Because Steve likes to linger. Sticks around when picking the kids up from Hellfire to chitchat. Asks how band practice is going when Eddie comes into Family Video to bother Robin. Even offers to drive Eddie to physiotherapy if he is in too much pain to do it himself and even though Eddie declines Steve somehow still lingers. 

The same way he now lingers around Wayne and Eddie. Wayne is shooting Eddie a pointed look and Eddie realizes that he still hasn’t said anything. 

“Thanks, Harrington,” he manages to get out. 

“I was just telling your uncle that Robin and I are having a small party at my place tonight to celebrate. Jonathan and Nancy and some band kids will be there too,” Steve says, either unphased or unaware of the rigid tension keeping Eddie frozen. “You should come too, bring your bandmates.” 

It’s not the first time Eddie has been invited to a party. Freakish he might be, but he has one thing that all the rich popular kids on Steve’s side of town want: drugs. 

Eddie searches Steve’s face, wondering whether that is the reason Steve is inviting him. To get something with more of a kick than just beers and whatever fancy liquor he might steal from his parents' cabinets? 

But then again, while Eddie would never be so foolish to underestimate the level of wild and unhinged nerds like band members and theater kids can get, they aren’t really the clientele to snort Special K or chuck handfuls of MDMA. And while some of them might fancy the occasional joint, he knows that Byers has a stash big enough to make half of Hawkins high enough to reach the stars. 

Still, he finds himself asking, “Do you need me to bring anything else ?”  

Steve frowns before he gets what Eddie is hinting at and shakes his head. 

“Just yourself, Munson, just yourself,” he grins and for the first time today, some of the tension is easing out of Eddie’s shoulders. 

“Yeah, maybe,” Eddie says non-committal, even though he knows Robin will be beyond pissed if he doesn’t show. 

“Great, then I have a party to prep,” Steve continues to grin before turning to Wayne. “Mr Munson, it was nice talking to you.”

Ever so polite and perfect. 

Wayne gives Steve a nod, which is more than most people get from Wayne. 

“And I will see you,” Steve makes finger guns at Eddie while he begins to walk backwards, “later.” 

It makes him look like a dork and not cool at all, but Steve doesn’t seem to care. Like he actually has reconsidered how much value to assign the social construct that is popularity. Eddie adds it to his mental list of things he doesn’t want to examine more closely about Steve Harrington. 

“I said maybe ,” he fires back, but Steve ignores it. 

“Oh, and leave the dice at home,” he says while continuing to walk backwards. “It’s my kinda party, not your kinda party.” 

Before Eddie can shoot anything back, Steve is too far gone. Even though he can’t see Eddie, Eddie rolls his eyes. He is surprised though that Steve knows that a group of DnD players is called a party. But then again Steve has been babysitting the nerds for a couple of years now, so it kinda makes sense. Still doesn't make it any less weird that the former king of Hawkins High knows DnD. 

“That Harrington kid is not what I expected him to be,” Wayne says as they watch Steve make it across the field to Robin. 

“Yeah, me neither,” Eddie mumbles quietly. 

He still struggles to wrap his head around that Steve The Hair Harrington, King Steve, womanizing, rich, ex-basketball player, jock Steve Harrington is kind. Genuinely kind and nice and not the superficial jerk prancing through the school hallways avoiding Eddie like the plague anymore. 

Once they had killed Vecna and closed the upsidedown for good, Eddie had thought that Steve would show who he really was and return to his old ways. When your life is in danger you tend to work with any ally you can get, even a cowardly freak like Eddie. And then once the danger is over, it’s time to get the pitchforks and torches back out to remind people like Eddie where they truly belong. 

But instead the lingering had happened and helping Hopper to clear Eddie’s name and getting the murder charges dropped, and then some more lingering and now Eddie is invited to a party. 

A few weeks ago, Eddie would have thought that this might be some kind of Carrie situation. One last big moment of cruelty from the mighty King Steve to delight his confidants and entertain the masses. And what is a freak if not a court jester? 

But Eddie knows better now. Knows that the callous confidants of Tommy H. and his army of jocks have turned into a dorky lesbian, an ex-girlfriend, and a stoner. And that the masses King Steve once used to beguile are now a gaggle of loud mouthed, nerdy kids. And King Steve himself? Gone. Vanished without a trace, no matter how vivid he sometimes still is in Eddie’s memory. Point is, nothing bad is going to happen to Eddie at the party. He still doesn’t want to go. 

“C’mon kid,” Wayne rips him out of his thoughts and nudges him gently, “let me treat ya to lunch.”

The diner is relatively empty, it’s only eleven am, and still an hour and a half to go before the lunch rush. Eddie sinks deep into the booth and hides behind the large menu. He knows the few patrons that are in are staring at him regardless. 

He’s lost the graduation robe and is back to his leather jacket he likes to carry like it is armor. He does already feel more comfortable in it, the robe was absolutely not him. 

Just like fancy brunch in high-end restaurants that people like Jason are probably having right now, getting tipsy on champagne and stuffed with caviar, isn’t him. He knows Wayne feels guilty that he can’t give Eddie a better graduation celebration than brunch at the diner, but waffles with over-easy eggs and coffee so strong it could raise the dead are all that Eddie could want. It’s funny how a near-death experience can make you enjoy the simpler things of life. 

“You should go by the way,” Wayne says when Eddie is halfway done with his waffles. 

“Sorry?” 

“To that Harrington kid’s party,” Wayne continues and takes a sip from his coffee. “He seemed eager to have you there.” 

Eddie raises an eyebrow, skeptical. Just because Steve invited him out of politeness doesn’t mean that he was exactly eager. 

“Your friend, the Robin girl, seems to be close with him.”

“And?” Eddie is not quite following his uncle. Just because he is friends with Robin and Robin is friends with Steve doesn't mean Eddie has to be. It's not like Robin is hanging out with Gareth or Jeff either. 

“Well, she seems like a smart girl,” Wayne says. “And I think it would be good for you to have more friends in this town.” 

Eddie looks up from his plate. Wayne has never been the best with words when it comes to emotions and neither has Eddie. But he can still see the fear and the worry in Wayne’s eyes and he understands. 

“Alright, I’ll go,” he promises his uncle and Wayne’s gaze becomes a bit less heavy. 

This is how Eddie finds himself outside of Steve’s house at nine pm. He prays that the neighbors won’t see him and call the cops. He’s switched his hellfire shirt for a simple black tee and left his leather jacket in the trailer. It is far too hot this time of year for leather, no matter how well it suits him and how naked he feels without it. 

“Eddie!” Steve greets him at the door, his eyes hidden behind shades and a beer in his hand. “Where is the rest of Corroded Coffin ?” 

Eddie blinks, surprised that Steve Harrington knows the name of his band. Eddie has done a good enough job at avoiding Steve for his band to ever come up. But then again, Chrissy knew it too. Not all rich popular kids are the same, he reminds himself. Especially not Steve. 

“Ah, they only come out when it’s a full moon, I’m afraid,” he jokes half-heartedly. 

“More booze for us then,” Steve shrugs and steps aside so that Eddie can come in. 

In reality, Eddie hadn’t even told the other members of Corroded Coffin about the party. He isn’t even sure himself why he is here, standing in Steve Harrington’s hallway. How was he supposed to explain to his friends that he was invited to Harrington's party not as a dealer but as a guest? Somehow we saved the world together and now we have shared custody over Dustin didn’t seem like an answer that would satisfy them. Nor does it really satisfy Eddie, what the hell is he doing here? 

The sound of laughter and music is coming from the other end of the house and for a second Eddie considers turning around on the spot. But then Steve’s hand lands on his back and pushes him gently towards the noise. 

“Let’s get you something to drink,” he says as they walk into a living room that is bigger than Eddie’s trailer. One of the big glass doors is open, leading onto a terrace where Eddie can already spot Robin goofing around with Vickie. When she sees Eddie she waves at him excitedly. 

“Holy shit, you have a pool, Harrington?” Eddie lets out a low whistle as they step outside. He knew Steve’s parents were rich, but not like rich rich. He is so distracted by the pool he almost doesn’t notice the bitter expression flickering over Steve’s face. 

“Yeah, it’s too cold for swimming though,” he says even though sweat is running down both their backs. “I’ll get you that drink,” he mumbles and disappears, leaving Eddie alone in his huge backyard. 

Fuck, does he feel out of place. The feeling subsides slightly when Robin hugs him hello and he reminds himself that she is very much just like him—sans the murder charges—and she feels as comfortable in Steve's house as if it was her own home. If he didn’t know that Robin was gay, he wouldn’t be surprised if she and Steve were dating, given how close they are.

“You made it,” she smiles at him so broadly he can tell she definitely has had her first few drinks. “You remember Vickie?” she asks and leads him to Vickie, who gently swings to whatever generic pop song is coming from Steve’s speakers. 

“Of course, hi Vickie,” he waves at her and she waves back. They both had to suffer through Mrs O'Donnell's class. They are basically comrades in arms. Forget the upside down, that class leads to the real trauma bonding. 

“Robin wasn’t sure if you were going to come over or not,” Vickie tells him. “Went on and on about you.” 

“Well, here I am,” he spreads out his arms and bows slightly, causing Vickie and Robin to giggle. “Though I might leave soon if this…top 40 shit is going to play all night.” 

“God, yeah,” Robin shakes her head. “Steve’s obsession with Wham! is the bane of my existence.” 

“Well, come on then,” Vickie grabs her hand and Robin turns as red as a cherry. “Let’s put on something more palatable.” 

She tugs Robin along to the stereo and Robin mouths help at Eddie, who can only grin. 

“No Blondie either,” he calls after them jokingly, knowing how much Robin loves Blondie. She flips him off and seconds later Heart of Glass begins playing. Eddie shakes his head and looks around. 

Robin’s friends from band turn out to just be Vickie and the only other people at the party are Nancy and Jonathan. He gives them a quick nod when they join Robin and Vickie at the stereo and they wave back. It makes Eddie relax slightly. At least he knows those people and none of them look at him like they want him dead. 

Still, he takes a big swing out of the beer bottle Steve presses into his hand a moment later. 

“And here I thought you were popular, Harrington,” Eddie puts on a fake, confident grin once he has put the bottle down. “I expected at least one of those hot dates you keep having to be here.”

He manages to keep his leg from bouncing, but his thumb is already rubbing over the damp label on the beer bottle, peeling it off. 

“Well, none of us are that comfortable with crowds these days,” Steve shrugs. “And honestly, I’d rather just hang out with the people that matter.” 

He says it so matter of factly, with such honesty and conviction, his hazel eyes focused on Eddie that it knocks the air out of Eddie’s lungs. The people that matter. And god, Steve needs to stop doing this. Not being a dick is one thing, but pretending that Eddie is his friend? That Eddie actually matters to him? Eddie doesn’t buy that. He can’t allow himself to buy that. Steve barely even knows him, and if he knew Eddie, truly knew Eddie like Robin does, he sure wouldn’t spout such wannabe kumbaya my lord bullshit. 

Steve has apparently also become an expert in reading Eddie because he frowns and sits down on the terrace floor, motioning for Eddie to join him. Reluctantly, Eddie sits down, legs crossed, looking expectantly at Steve. 

“You’re Robin’s friend, the kids sure look up to you, and once you’ve done the whole upside down end of the world bullshit, you are part of the group,” Steve explains. “Like it or not.” 

It’s not that Eddie doesn’t like it. If he is honest, he likes it so much it scares the shit out of him. Because good things don’t happen to Eddie Munson. And if they do, they sure don’t last. 

“Is that why you’re cool,” he does air quotes around the word cool, “with Byers being here?” He asks and points with his bottle towards Jonathan who is laughing at something Nancy has said. 

“Jonathan and I get along surprisingly well,” Steve says and Eddie actually believes him. “Going through this shit a couple of times doesn’t really leave you a choice but to grow up and leave the past behind.” 

Eddie hums, thinking about it. If Byers and Steve can get along, then why shouldn’t he and Steve get along. Though deep down inside Eddie knows he isn’t particularly worried about the getting along part. He is worried about something far more stupid and far more dangerous. 

“I take it no hard feelings you and Wheeler didn’t make it work then?” 

“Nah,” Steve takes a sip from his own beer. “We knew we wouldn’t work. What happened in the upside down was just…the comfort of nostalgia? I don’t know man. Either way, she is better off with Jonathan.” 

“Even though you were such a knight in shining armor,” Eddie says sarcastically and to his delight, he gets a grin out of Steve. 

“I think Nancy is very much her own knight in shining armor,” Steve sighs and Eddie agrees. He never knew how much of a badass Nancy future Harvard graduate Wheeler was until she pumped Vecna full of lead in the upside down. 

“And you are truly more of a court jester than a knight, ” Eddie teases and Steve gasps shocked before shoving Eddie gently. 

“If I’m the jester what does that make you?” He teases back. “The castle’s ass?” 

“Hmmm, no,” Eddie fake contemplates. “I only have an ass. A spectacular one at that.” 

He takes another sip of his beer while Steve laughs. 

“Oh is that why you always half cover it with that black bandana of yours?” 

Eddie chokes on his beer. Steve hits his back a couple of times, not knowing that his touch is making Eddie’s choking worse. Does he know, Eddie wonders while coughing half his lungs out. Is that why he is asking?

But then the chances are slim that a guy like Steve Harrington from a small town in Indiana knows what flagging is. Eddie knows that Robin knows though. Still, she would never betray his trust and tell Steve. Eddie knows that Steve is cool with Robin being gay, but he also knows that it’s always something different with guys. 

He should probably change the topic, but enough alcohol has entered his bloodstream to loosen his tongue slightly. 

“Why, Harrington?” he almost purrs once he has recovered from choking, “Have you been trying to get a better look at my ass?” 

Steve’s smile falters and the warm feeling of alcohol in Eddie’s stomach turns into cold panic tightening around his chest making it hard to breathe. Has he gone too far? 

“Hey, you guys wanna play truth or dare?” Nancy’s voice cuts through the strained tension between them. She is still standing on the other side of the terrace together with the others and holds up an empty bottle. Steve turns around to her.

“What are we, twelve?” 

“Do you have a better idea for a game?” She raises an eyebrow, challenging. 

Steve opens his mouth and then closes it again. 

“That's what I thought,” Nancy says triumphantly, “now come over.” 

“You still think I’m one of the cool kids, Munson?” Steve mutters and gets up. He holds out his hand for Eddie to take, their unfinished conversation apparently already forgotten. 

“I never thought you were actually cool, Harrington,” Eddie takes Steve’s hand and lets himself be pulled up. 

Once again the gentle touch and casual affection feels like a shock to the system. Eddie once read that it takes six months for a habit to stick, he wonders if getting used to this new Steve Harrington will take just as long. 

They walk over and join the circle. Eddie notices that Robin has very strategically sat down across from Vickie and Jonathan and Nancy have mirrored their position, leaving Eddie and Steve no choice but to also sit across from each other. 

The game itself is surprisingly fun. Vickie gets Nancy to admit that she has actually cheated on tests before, Jonathan has to run one round around the pool in Nancy’s heels, and Vickie comes clean about shoplifting a lipstick once. When it’s Eddie’s turn to give Robin a dare, he asks her to perform the Time Warp from Rocky Horror. 

“Don’t make me do it alooooone,” she pleads but already gets up. 

“I’ll join you,” Vickie giggles and joins Robin by doing a jump to the left before stepping to the right. Eddie wiggles his eyebrows at Robin. So much for wondering if Vickie is actually queer too. 

Jonathan and Nancy are staring at the two girls dancing with a mixture of fascination and bewilderment. Unsurprisingly, it seems like they have not seen Rocky Horror. Then Eddie’ eyes land on Steve and he has to do a double-take because Steve is actually mouthing the words along. 

“I didn’t know you knew Rocky Horror, Harrington,” Eddie doesn’t know if he is impressed or if he should panic because Steve knows what Rocky Horror is and he most likely knows the connotations of being a Rocky Horror fan. And if he knows those connotations maybe he does know what flagging is and if he does know what flagging is than he also does know that-

“I work in a video rental store,” Steve cuts through Eddie’s spiraling thoughts. 

Right, that makes sense. A lot more sense than Steve being an expert regarding friends of Dorothy and where to find them. 

The girls sit back down and Eddie chucks his third? fourth? beer while Robin spins the bottle. It lands on Steve who lamely chooses truth and begrudgingly admits that he spends about an hour in the morning on his hair. 

Then it’s Steve’s turn to spin the bottle. The sound of glass rolling over stone fills the night and mesmerized Eddie watches the bottle turn around and round and round. He doesn’t notice he has held his breath until the bottle stops, neck unmistakably pointing at him. His eyes flick from the bottle up to Steve’s. 

“So, Munson,” Steve leans forward, a smug smile on his face, “Truth? Or dare?” 

Eddie considers. He knows he could choose truth and still lie depending on the question. He never understood that about truth or dare, nothing is keeping people from simply not telling the truth. But Eddie knows he has so many truths he’d rather hide that threaten to spill over his lips with every sip of alcohol he takes. So he leans forward as well. 

“I dare you to dare me, Harrington,” he says as if he had just challenged Steve to a duel. 

“I dare you…” Steve begins and then hesitates. For the first time, Eddie notices how close they are. Their circle wasn’t big, to begin with, and now that both of them are leaning forward there are mere inches between their faces. Eddie’s hands grow clammy again. He holds Harrington’s stare and raises his eyebrows slightly as if to say bring it on big boy, even though he once again feels anything but brave. 

Then, for the briefest of seconds, Steve’s eyes flicker to Eddie’s lips. It happens so quickly, Eddie almost thinks he has only imagined it if it wasn’t for Steve eyes turning comically wide as if he was a Looney Toons character.

He is going to dare me to kiss him , Eddie thinks and then nothing else. His brain is hung up on the idea of what it might feel like to kiss Steve Harrington. It's not the first time it has happened, but usually Eddie snaps out of it as quickly as pulling your hand away from a hot stove. But right now he has completely forgotten that the others are there. Steve leans even closer and Eddie can’t help but stare at Steve’s lips too. He wonders if they feel as soft as they look. Not that it matters because Steve fucking Harrington is going to dare Eddie to kiss him.

“I dare you to get yourself and me another beer.” 

And just like that, the spell is broken. Steve leans back and Eddie blinks confused back into reality. 

“Wow, you’re so lame, Steve,” Robin sighs next to him and Nancy, Vickie and Jonathan giggle at her comment. It’s all that Eddie needs to sober up. 

“Not lame, just lazy,” Steve muses and gets another laugh out of the others. 

“And here I thought you were just too cheap to get a maid,” Eddie hears himself joke as he gets up. Humour is a great mechanism to hide behind. This way he grins into the group even though on the inside he is screaming. 

“Hey, I said to get yourself one too,” Steve points out. “Unless you don’t want more, in which case we also have soda in the fridge.” 

“I’m tipsy Harrington,” Eddie says as he begins walking to the kitchen. Don’t run, don’t run, he tells himself. “Not blackout drunk.” 

If Steve says something back, he doesn’t hear it. There is too much noise in his ears. He reaches the kitchen and slams the door shut, leaning his back against it for support. 

“Fuck,” he curses. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” 

Did he honestly just consider kissing Steve Harrington while only sitting inches away from him? Fuck. His heart is pounding so much at the thought it’s almost jumping out of his chest. Given that Eddie probably would have kissed Steve if Steve had dared him, Eddie really shouldn’t drink more. Yet with shaky hands, he reaches for the fridge. He takes two beers out and uses the top of Steve’s bottle to open his own. Eagerly, he drinks the bitter liquid. 

“FUCK!” He curses again. Thinking about kissing Steve Harrington at night in the safety of his trailer at the other end of town is one thing. Steve is definitely attractive, Eddie has stopped lying to himself about that a while a go. But actually, considering doing it? In front of people of all things? Eddie must be losing his mind. 

He tries to calm himself. In the end, it doesn’t matter because Steve didn’t dare him. And Steve would never dare him. After all, he is as straight as they come. Robin is more likely to kiss Eddie than Steve is. All Eddie has to do really, is to get his fucking act together and not think about Steve’s stupid, pink, smooth lips. 

He looks at the bottle in his hand and downs half of it. He should leave once he is finished with it before he gets any more brilliant ideas like almost kissing Steve Harrington. 

When he returns the group has thankfully abandoned the game and started to talk about summer plans instead. Nancy and Jonathan have to leave in late August and want to make the most of the summer. Vickie just really wants to go swimming at Lovers Lake. Robin gives her an encouraging smile, even though Eddie knows none of them are keen to go swimming there again. 

“What about you, Munson?” Steve asks as Eddie hands him his beer, making very sure that their fingers do not brush. “Any great plans for summer other than playing DnD with the gremlins?” 

“I need to find a job,” Eddie sighs and sits down as far from Steve as possible. “College isn’t really my thing.” 

Steve and Robin nod knowingly. Neither of them knows what to do with their lives really and for the foreseeable future, they plan on working in the video store. 

“Hey, we could always use more hands at Family Video,” Robin suggests. 

Eddie’s eyes quickly flicker over to Steve, who shows no reaction to Robin’s idea. While technically working at Family Video sounds like a fun job, it would make Eddie’s whole avoiding Steve agenda pretty difficult.

“I don’t know Robin,” Eddie hesitates. “I don’t really have the best resume…or reputation for people to hire me.” 

“Keith isn’t going to care. Right, Steve?” Robin elbows Steve into the side. 

“Oww,” he complains and rubs his waist. “Yeah, I’m sure Keith will hire you, man,” he adds after a moment. He doesn’t sound exactly thrilled about the idea, but also not like he would rather have a fist fight with a demogorgon. 

“I’ll think about it,” Eddie mumbles and finishes the rest of his beer. Working at Family Video is a bad idea. He holds up his empty bottle. “I should probably leave.” 

“Us too,” Nancy says as she and Jonathan are getting up, before turning to Eddie. “We can drive you.”  

“Thanks, but I could use the walk,” Eddie declines their offer. 

He can already feel the panic about almost kissing Steve claw up his throat like heartburn and he isn’t really fond of having a panic attack in the back of Jonathan’s car while the Smiths go on about crashing into double decker buses over the stereo. Whiny bastards.  

Vickie has her head rested on Robin’s shoulder and Robin lets out a hearty yawn. 

“You still cool with letting us stay in your guest room,” she asks Steve and Steve nods. 

While Robin nudges a very tired Vickie towards the guest room, Steve brings the rest of them to the door. 

“You sure we can’t drop you off?” Nancy asks again and Eddie declines once more. He really, really, really needs to clear his head. 

“Alright,” Nancy says and waves goodbye before she leaves with Jonathan while Eddie is still busy tying his shoes. 

He wishes he had been quicker because now it’s just Steve and him. Eddie tries to tie his shoelaces as normal as possible. There is no gay way to tie your shoelaces, Munson, he berates himself in his head. His hands still shake. Just as he is done, Steve mumbles, “You could also stay, you know?” 

“Thanks, Harrington, but I think if I tried to sleep in a house this size I might get agoraphobia,” Eddie looks up from his shoes and shakes his head. 

“We usually don’t have that many spiders in the house?” Steve says so confused and perplexed it makes Eddie laugh. And kind of wanting to ki— and nope, not going there. Not again. 

“Don’t ya worry your pretty head, Harrington,” Eddie chuckles and promptly turns to leave before he says anything else stupid or god forbid does anything stupid like ruffling Steve’s hair. Or kissing him.

But then Steve reaches out and grabs his wrist. Eddie freezes, before very slowly turning around, afraid of what Steve might do. He expects anything really, ranging from anger to disgust. What he doesn’t expect is worry. 

“Call me when you get home, okay?” Steve asks and Eddie frowns. He is about to point out that this is Hawkins and that he isn’t six years old anymore, but the urgency in Steve’s eyes makes him stop. “People tend to get missing if they walk home alone in Hawkins,” Steve continues. “So, promise me you will call!” 

“Okay,” Eddie rasps. It hits him right there and then how much Steve has truly been through and how much he has lost. Eddie has been through one of those shit shows, Steve has been through four? And yet he still manages to keep his cool and hasn’t gone completely off the rails. Eddie can’t help but admire that. 

Steve stares at him for a moment longer with his unfairly pretty hazel eyes before he lets go of Eddie’s arm. 

“Good,” he mumbles and there is something so raw and vulnerable about it that Eddie basically has to sprint out of Steve’s hallway before he does something he can’t take back. 

“Bye, Steve,” he calls back up before rushing down the empty street. He can feel Steve’s eyes rest on him until he has completely disappeared into the darkness. 

Eddie finds that he misses the feeling of Steve watching him a couple of streets later and lets out another string of curses. He is truly fucked. 

Notes:

If you enjoyed this fic please feel free to leave comments/kudos they absolutely make my day <3 Also feel free to follow me on
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Chapter 2: You don't need experience

Notes:

Me, a bilingual, bisexual, enby person who's never made a decision in their life using alternating povs in a fic? Groundbreaking

Eddie doesn’t call and Steve doesn’t sleep. He could be lying, comfortable in his cozy bed, snoozing, slumbering, and dreaming of Heidi, or Stacy, maybe even Gina. At least, that is what he tries to tell himself. He hasn’t been able to sleep properly since before Starcourt Mall. And after the Russians last summer and Vecna this spring Steve cannot remember a single night where he hasn’t woken up screaming and covered in sweat. One of the reasons Steve is glad his parents are never home. The vast emptiness of his house might not be comforting in the slightest. But he knows if his parents heard him scream in the middle of the night they would chide him and call him immature for getting worked over such a silly thing like a nightmare. And how dare he interrupt their sleep, it would be simply inconsiderate of Steve to have nightmares.

Still, Steve could be tossing and turning in the comfort of his bed. Instead, he sits on the less comfortable couch in his living room, eyes glued to the silent phone, his leg bouncing so rapidly that Steve is slightly worried he is going to break the wooden floorboards. 

At some point, he nods off. His sleep is filled with the screeching of demobats and Eddie’s screams of agony. He wakes up with a jolt and his own scream on his lips. Robin is bent over him, a hand gently placed on his shoulder. 

“Shit, did I wake you?” He pants and Robin shakes her head with a sad smile. 

“Had my own screaming to do,” she whispers and nudges Steve’s legs with her own. He pulls his legs closer to his chest and Robin climbs onto the couch next to him. She takes the blanket that hangs over the armrest and pulls it over them both. The clock under the TV reads 5 am. Steve has never been so glad that his parents aren’t the kind of people to have a grandfather clock and rather go for modern technology. Robin rests her head on his shoulder. 

“Vickie?” He asks and puts his arm around Robin. 

“Still asleep thankfully.” 

“Did you two finally…” Steve asks with a grin, but Robin shakes her head. 

“We talked, though. We talked a lot,” she yawns and snuggles closer against Steve. The oppressive heat of the day has gone and with the AC sending shivers down Steve’s spine, Steve appreciates Robin’s body heat. “God, Steve, I like her so much.” 

The last sentence is barely audible. Steve can’t blame Robin. If someone he liked was just upstairs, he too would gush as quietly as possible about them.

“And I’m sure she likes you too,” he whispers back. “Otherwise she wouldn’t be upstairs, sharing a bed with you.” 

Robin hums, pretending to contemplate, but Steve knows she doesn’t believe him one word. Maybe waking up next to Vickie will change Robin’s mind. There is no moment in which people are quite so honest with their affection than when they have just woken up next to the object of said affection. 

“Why are you down here?” Robin changes the topic and Steve lets out a long sigh. 

“Eddie said he would call once he got home,” he mumbles and waits for Robin to tease him for being overprotective of everyone. But neither of them feels like teasing the other in the early post-nightmare hours of the morning. Robin pats his arm gently. 

“I’m sure he made it home alright.” Another yawn escapes her. “Probably just forgot to call by the time he got home. Or he didn’t think you were being serious.” 

“I said it pretty seriously,” Steve grumbles. And Eddie’s promise to call had seemed pretty honest too. A small grin flickers over Robin’s face. 

“Yeah, but he is new to this,” she says softly. “To him, the idea of calling Steve The Hair Harrington to confirm that he got home safely is probably just as strange as the existence of the upside down used to be.” 

Steve rolls his eyes at the nickname, but Robin does have a point. The Steve Harrington that Eddie used to know before spring break wouldn’t have really cared if someone like Eddie got home safely or not. And even though their experience in the upside down bonded them quickly together, Steve still has to slowly show Eddie that he is different now. That he does care. He wishes he knew a way he could make Eddie see this new him and make him believe that Steve does truly care. 

Next to him, Robin’s breath has become calm and quiet. Her eyes are almost closed and Steve can tell she is barely keeping herself from falling asleep. 

“C’mon,” he says and lifts his arm and the blanket off Robin. “Time to go back upstairs.” 

Robin lets out a tiny, disgruntled moan but then lets herself be led up back to the guest bedroom by Steve. 

“Night, Steve,” she mumbles before staggering back to bed. 

With a smile, Steve closes the guest bedroom door as quietly as he can. He turns around and stares down the hallway. The door to his room is cracked open slightly, allowing a small sliver of dusk to shine into the hallway. He could try to sleep. But he knows he isn’t going to. So instead he returns downstairs and begins to pace. 

That’s how Robin and Vickie find him about two hours later, walking up and down the kitchen, eyes still glued to the phone. He stops briefly to make the girls breakfast and to give Robin a questioning look. Very subtly she shakes her head again. 

Once they are done with breakfast, Vickie says goodbye, thanking Steve for the party and letting her stay over in the guest bedroom. 

“Call me when you’re done with work,” she tells Robin and gives her a quick hug. 

“Okiedokie, will do,” Robin babbles, turning redder than the freckles spread over Vickie’s nose. “See you later, alligator.” 

Vickie just gives her a  wave with a smile and then leaves. If that didn’t scare her away then Steve doesn’t know what will. 

“God, kill me now,” Robin groans as soon as Vickie can’t hear them anymore. “ Okiedokie? See you later, alligator? What’s wrong with me.”

“You still have that you suck board?” Steve teases, even though he is pretty sure that it’s impossible for Robin to suck when it comes to Vickie. 

“Ugh, shut up,” Robin hides her face in her hands. “We should get going, or we will be late for work.” 

“And what a shame that would be.” 

“Not as much as having no paycheck would be, dingus,” Robin says and slides into the passenger seat. 

Seeing Robin and Vickie dance around each other awkwardly had been entertaining enough to take Steve’s mind off things. But as he drives them to work, he passes Jason’s car and his stomach twists. Jason has been lying low since spring break, got a hefty slap on the wrist for starting a vigilante mob. But that doesn’t mean he’s stopped having it out for Eddie. Steve just hopes that Jason hasn’t been cruising the streets of Hawkins last night when Eddie was on his way home. 

He starts to pace again when they are at Family Video, much to Robin’s amusement. She sits on a desk, her legs dangling in the air, her eyes following Steve from one end of the counter to the other one. 

“Is this still about Eddie?” 

“Yup,” Steve says flatly. He knows he is probably overreacting, but that doesn’t stop his heart from beating hummingbird wings fast and his mind from conjuring the most gruesome images. As much as he dislikes them usually, he could really do with a customer right now to distract him. But alas, Family Video is deserted.

“He’ll be fine, Steve,” Robin tries to reassure him. “He is a grown-up.” 

Steve snorts bitterly. 

“So are you and yet.” 

“Ouch,” Robin throws a paper ball at him and Steve stops in his tracks to glare at her. She just sticks out her tongue and grins. Steve knows she is trying her best to distract him, but right now it’s more agitating than distracting. 

“I just don’t understand why he didn’t call.”

“Why don’t you ask him yourself?” Robin suggests and nods behind Steve. 

When Steve turns around Eddie is already through the front door of Family Video making his way to the counter. 

He seems fine. No fresh bruises, no dripping blood, apparently Eddie is unharmed. He has the same mischievous smile on his lips as always, but Steve can tell that it’s put on. The dark circles under his big brown eyes tell a different story. He looks tired. Steve should be satisfied that Eddie got apparently just as much sleep as he did, serves him right for not calling. But he isn’t. Instead his brain is supplying him with various, horrible scenarios as to why Eddie got no sleep. 

That worry is slightly squandered when Eddie slaps two overdue tapes on the counter and greets Steve with, “Good morning, sunshine,” instead of bashfully apologizing for not calling. 

“You didn’t call!” 

God, he hates how much he sounds like a spurned lover. 

“There is something called the three-day rule,” Eddie grins at him and Steve can barely contain his irritation. 

“That is for dates, not for wandering around Hawkins alone at night,” he snaps. “And a completely stupid rule.”

“So you call girls as soon as you get home from your dates?” Eddie teases. “Clingy, Harrington!” 

Behind Steve, Robin snorts. 

“Try never,” she jumps off the table just to stab Steve in the back. “There is a reason Steve hasn’t had a second date in…ever?” 

She takes Eddie’s tapes off the counter and changes their status on the computer to returned . Of course, she waives the late fees. 

“At least I’ve had first dates,” Steve shoots back and yes, maybe that’s a bit uncalled for he realizes as soon as he has said it and Robin’s smile falters. But he is pissed right now and not up for Robin’s jokes when he’s been stressing about Eddie for nothing apparently. 

“You could have had a run-in with a demogorgon or been attacked by whatever else lurks in the upside down,” he turns back to Eddie. “Or been abducted by aliens, don’t laugh at that, this is Hawkins, it could happen. You could have been ambushed by Jason and his band of dicks who are seconds away from turning into a mob again. So excuse me for being annoyed you didn’t call!” 

Eddie stares at him in surprise, the grin slowly slipping off his face. 

“Gee, I didn’t know you cared that much, Harrington,” he says and rubs the back of his neck, sheepishly. Part of Steve wants to grab the collar of Eddie’s jacket and shake him. Of course Steve fucking cares. 

“Yeah, well, I do,” he takes a deep breath, trying to calm down. “As I told you, you are part of the team, like it or not. So next time you leave my house in the middle of the night you better call!” 

“Next time I leave your house in the middle of the night?” The grin returns to Eddie’s face together with the shield of humor he likes to hide behind so much. “Are you propositioning me, Stevie?” 

“I would expect you to stay the night if I did,” Steve hears the words tumble out of his mouth without his brain having given permission to speak them. 

For a second he worries that he has gone too far, but it’s too late now. He’s said the words, he can’t take them back. So instead of floundering Steve keeps his eyes steady on Eddie and adds a little smirk as if to challenge him. This is what they do, after all, this fake flirty back and forth. At least when Eddie isn’t avoiding him. 

It had hurt slightly when Eddie had become friends with Robin and grown closer with Nancy and Jonathan, but made sure to keep his distance from Steve. It made sense to a certain degree, after all Steve had been a massive dick in high school and Eddie had ended up on the receiving end of Tommy’s sneers a couple of times. But Steve had thought that they had kind of had their moments in the upside down. When Steve had begrudgingly admitted to himself that Eddie Munson was kind of cool and nice and funny and Steve wouldn’t mind being friends. 

So when Eddie had started to avoid him, Steve had done his best to be patient. To exist on Eddie’s periphery but to not force himself into the center of Eddie’s life. But even on the edges, Steve had apparently stuck out like a sore thumb causing Eddie to snark, tease and fake flirt with Steve every time they passed each other. Maybe Eddie just was like this, or maybe he was to make Steve uncomfortable, to scare him off. 

But Steve hadn’t been uncomfortable and had instead decided to fake flirt back, ending them up in this verbal version of gay chicken. Steve knows Eddie is just waiting for him to freak. But Steve won’t give him the satisfaction. 

“My, my, you really are a romantic,” Eddie lifts the back of his hand to his forehead and pretends to swoon. Steve just rolls his eyes and is about to respond with something equally snarky but Robin cuts him off. 

“As much as I am enjoying the two of you…doing your thing,” she says and Steve could swear she was about to say flirting. “This is a place of work,” determined she puts her hands on her hips and Steve has to snort. As if they weren’t trying to slack off at any possibility they get. 

“So, Eddie,” she continues, “Have you considered the job offer.” 

Steve tries not to groan. It’s not like he would absolutely hate it if Eddie started to work with them. But, as much as they are agonizing, Steve’s shifts at Family Video are his and Robin’s hang-out time. Of course, they hang out plenty of time outside of work too. But nevertheless, Family Video is a Steve Robin thing, not a Steve Robin and Eddie thing. 

Second of all, it is already hard enough for Steve to get a date. And Eddie is good-looking and funny, charming if he wants to and a lot of girls are probably going to find his nerdy side endearing instead of…well, so god damn nerdy. He might have been called the freak by most of Hawkins High, but Steve is painfully aware of how little people care about a high school reputation once you’ve graduated. And that is not even taking his tattoos, or that he plays the guitar. Steve’s musical talents do not surpass the triangle. He really doesn’t need that kind of competition. 

“I don’t know, Robin,” Eddie shakes his head. “I already told you I’m not really the wet dream of any employer.” 

“Keith is fine with it. I asked him this morning.”

“You asked Keith this morning?” Steve says, taken aback. He remembers briefly saying hello to Keith when he had unlocked the store, but when had Robin talked to him about Eddie? 

“Yes, while you were busy pacing a hole into the carpet because of Eddie.”

“I didn’t pace,” he mutters before turning around and being caught by Eddie’s raised eyebrows. “I didn’t!” 

To his surprise, Eddie doesn’t poke fun at him. He instead keeps his eyes on Robin, his hands busy fidgeting with his rings. 

“Thanks for the offer,” he says, deflated. “But maybe I should just…stick to my side business.” 

Something twists in Steve’s stomach. He would never judge Eddie for dealing drugs. It would be quite hypocritical of him given how much weed he has smoked. But it’s not really a safe side business, especially not with the number of people having a vendetta against Eddie. And even with Hopper back, Steve knows that the deputies still have very strict eyes on Eddie. 

Steve exchanges a quick glance with Robin and he can tell that she is feeling something similar. 

“Look, I think I’m more likely to scare customers away from Family Video than bring them in,” Eddie adds. 

“When can you start?” Steve asks. Eddie frowns and opens his mouth, but before he can say anything, Steve grabs an application form and pushes it against Eddie. “No buts, Munson, just fill this out!” 

“Or what? You won’t proposition me anymore?” Eddie huffs, clutching the form to his chest. 

“No,” Steve stares Eddie dead in the eye. “But I will request single custody over the little shitheads.” 

They both like to act annoyed when they are on babysitting duty. But Steve knows that they both love the kids. And even though it’s technically an empty threat, because Steve knows he couldn’t keep the kids away from Eddie if he paid them to, not that he would actually want to keep them away, it’s still an effective threat. 

For a very long moment, Eddie stares back, holding Steve’s gaze fiercely, before sighing and finally looking at the form. 

“You drive a hard bargain, Harrington,” he mumbles. “Do you have a pen?” 

Before Steve can say or do anything, Eddie leans over the counter and takes a pen out of the chest pocket of Steve’s green Family Video vest. For a second he is so close to Steve that his curls tickle Steve’s face. The smell of leather, coffee and whatever shampoo Eddie is using hits Steve so hard he gets dizzy. 

Eddie doesn’t seem to notice. He pulls the cap of the pen off with his teeth and begins filling out the form. Steve’s eyes are glued to the cap in Eddie’s mouth. Not for the first time, Steve notices that Eddie has nice lips. They are wide and pink with a very prominent cupid’s bow that Steve would love to trace with his finger. Their skin is chapped because Eddie likes to chew on them when he gets nervous or taps his fingertips against them. It is really impossible not to notice Eddie’s lips given how often he touches them. 

Last night he had licked them after having a sip of beer and Steve had almost tripped and fallen into the pool. And during truth or dare, he had been, as so often, incapable of not staring at Eddie’s lips. For a brief moment last night, Steve had forgotten where he was and who he was with and had considered kissing Eddie. They had been so close and Eddie had had such a provocative glint in his eyes and it would have been so easy to say, “I dare you to kiss me.” 

And then he would have not only ruined his reluctant but still blossoming friendship with Eddie but possibly also lost Jonathan and Nancy as friends. Not that Steve actually thinks that Jonathan or Nancy would mind. Especially not Jonathan given the kind of not-so-subtle glances Mike and Will have exchanged since the Byers have moved back from California. But still, his mind had provided him with a most nightmarish scenario, in which even Robin turned on him. And so he had dared Eddie to get them new drinks. 

The panic from that moment still sits deep in his bones and Steve snaps out of his thoughts. He blinks quickly, trying to focus. He takes the thought about Eddie’s lips and shoves it into an overflowing box in the backmost part of his brain. The part that is called for later consideration and already filled to the brim with similar boxes that are labeled: Harrison Ford, Tim Curry, the guy who served Steve pizza during his last trip to Indianapolis and whatever the name of the lead singer of Bon Jovi is. 

He will open those boxes when he has time. Once their existence no longer makes cold sweat run down his back, drowning all the butterflies in his stomach.

Eddie meanwhile has finished filling out the form and puts the cap back on the pen. There is a tiny blue ink stain on his bottom lip and the Eddie box in Steve’s mind grows uncomfortably heavy. 

“Thanks,” Eddie says and holds the pen out for Steve to take. A tiny bite mark is ornamenting the cap. 

“Ugh, gross, man,” Robin groans. “I think you can keep the pen.” 

“Yeah, keep it,” Steve grimaces slightly looking at the pen. “I’ll be taking this.”

He reaches out and plucks the form from Eddie’s hands. For the briefest second their fingers brush and Steve might as well have pushed a fork into a socket. Steve knows there has always been something electric about Eddie, but the light touch of his skin feels like an actual live wire. 

“Sorry,” Eddie flinches slightly, he must have felt the electrical shock too. “Walked over too much carpet today.” 

Steve frowns, confused, and with no idea what Eddie is talking about. 

“You know, socks on carpet?” Eddie tries to explain. “When you rub two objects against each other and static electricity builds? Like a balloon against your hair?” 

With every word, Steve feels more and more out of the loop. He shakes his head. 

“No?” Eddie licks his lips nervously and god, today the universe just wants to test Steve. 

“You’re not the only one who army crawled himself to that high school diploma,” he jokes weakly. Behind him, Robin snickers. 

“Unless it’s admiring a girl’s physique , dear Steve doesn’t really have it with physics,” she teases and snatches Eddie’s form out of Steve’s hand. This time he doesn’t get an electric shock. “I’ll get this to Keith and he’ll call you about when your first shift is once he is done with the paperwork.” 

And with that she has gone to the back room that also functions as Keith’s office, leaving Eddie and Steve behind together. For a second, Steve worries that they are going to be trapped in awkward silence. But even if they don’t throw teasing comments at each other, hanging out with Eddie feels impossible to get awkward. Or silent. He rocks on his feet back and forth, his boots squeaking on the floor while his fingers drum out a quiet rhythm on the counter. 

Has he always been this fidgety or is this a new thing? Steve wonders, knowing how much he struggles to stay still ever since he had to face the first demo-monster. 

“So…got much planned for the rest of the day?” he asks eventually. 

“Just planning out the next campaign,” Eddie shrugs. “Promised the little bastards we would start next week. But we still gotta find a space. School's out for summer,” Eddie grins at his own words. “The Wheelers and Sinclairs aren’t really my biggest fans, Henderson doesn’t have the space, and the Byers are still settling into the new house.” 

“You could do it at my place,” Steve hears his own voice say, once again without his brain having given permission. Judging by Eddie’s face he caught both of them by surprise with that suggestion. 

“For real, dude?” Eddie asks and Steve has the chance to backtrack. But Eddie’s doe eyes beam at him and he smiles so widely a dimple appears on his cheek. Even if he wanted to, there is no way Steve can say no. Not when Eddie looks at him like that. 

“My parents aren’t back until September anyways,” he tries to play it cool. But the second he has said it Eddie truly beams at him and Steve forgets how to breathe. His entire face lights up and god, Steve would do anything to see Eddie smile like this all the time. It’s the kind of smile that Steve knows will get him into trouble eventually. 

“Honestly, thanks man,” Eddie says. “Henderson is gonna lose his shit.” 

“As long as I don’t have to play,” Steve mumbles and begins to sort through the tapes on the return card. Of course, half of them aren’t rewound. 

Eddie is about to reply something when Robin comes back. In her hands, she carries another obnoxiously green Family Video vest. 

“Here,” she hands it to Eddie with a little bow. “I hereby knight thee Sir Edward of the Family Video.”

Eddie too does a little bow. “Thank you, Milady.”

They are so freaking nerdy, and Steve is so freaking fond of them. 

“Speaking of ladies,” Eddie says as he musters the vest with the distaste it deserves, “how’d it go with Vickie last night?” 

Robin blushes and Steve drops the tape he was holding. Ironically it happens to be Victor/Victoria . Eddie and Robin give him a concerned look. 

“You alright, Steve?” Robin asks as he bends down to pick up the tape. 

“Yup, just clammy hands today.” 

“Delightful,” Robin deadpans before turning back to Eddie. “Nothing happened. We just…talked and then fell asleep.”

So Eddie definitely knows. It’s not like Steve would have pecked him for the homophobic type, Eddie knows all too well what it is like to be an outsider. But Steve is surprised that Robin told him. Maybe he hit on Robin too? The embarrassing memory makes Steve cringe and he is glad he still has his back to the other two. 

“What, not even morning snuggles?” 

“Nope,” Robin sighs, popping the p . 

“Well, she did tell Robin to call her tonight,” Steve joins their conversation and slings his arm around Robin. Carefully, he monitors Eddie’s reaction. If Eddie is surprised that Steve knows about Robin then he doesn’t show. “Told you the three-day rule was bullshit.” 

That gets a genuine chuckle out of Eddie. His dimple returns to his right cheek and another heavy box labeled Eddie drops in the back of Steve’s mind. 

“Well maybe Vickie doesn’t think that the three-day rule is bullshit, maybe she is a firm believer of it,” Robin says and pushes Steve’s arm off her shoulder. “In which case last night was definitely not a date…or something date-like since she told me to call her tonight and not in like three days.” 

“Well, only one way to find out,” Eddie leans in closer on the counter.“Take her on an actual date.”

“That’s what I said,” Steve says at the same time as Robin groans, “You know I can’t do that.”  

“Just call her tonight and suggest hanging out then,” Eddie shrugs. “And speaking of calling, I’ll better go. My last day of freedom from the capitalist hellscape that is working at Family Video calls. Better not waste it.” 

He waves them a quick goodbye and it takes all of Steve’s concentration not to watch him leave. He is already in a crisis about Eddie’s lips, he doesn’t need to throw fuel into the fire by staring at Eddie’s ass. 

“So Eddie knows ,” Steve says casually as he and Robin begin to stack the shelves. 

“Of course, Eddie knows. He’s…,” she suddenly stops and looks at Steve in a way that he can’t quite read. “A good friend.” 

“I thought I was your good friend.” 

Steve doesn’t mean to sound jealous, because he isn’t. It’s good that Robin has another adult friend, god knows Steve could do with more friends over the age of fifteen. He is just trying to figure out when it all happened. Sure, Robin and Eddie both still went to school, but they only had Spanish together. And Steve can’t imagine that conjugating verbs made them bond so much that Robin would come out to Eddie. Of course, they had their little moment in the upside down, but so did Nancy and Robin and as far as Steve knows, Robin never came out to Nancy. 

“You are the worse half of my disaster duo,” Robin shoves him lightly. “But Eddie is different. He is a different kind of good friend.”

“How is he different from me?” 

“He likes horror flicks,” Robin shrugs and puts the last tape back onto the shelf. Steve has the feeling she is not telling him everything, but if Robin doesn’t want to tell him everything, she doesn’t have to. It’s not like Steve does always tell her everything. Starting with the fact that he doesn’t really like the mixtape she made him for Christmas and ending with the ample number of boxes in his head.  

“I could like horror flicks,” he grumbles and refills the candy they sell at the counter. 

“Okay, prove it,” Robin chuckles. “Next Friday we pick a horror movie for movie night. And we invite Eddie.” 

Steve thinks about his small couch, all three of them squished on there, his thigh pressed against Eddie’s. He can already see himself jumping because of a scary scene, grabbing the hand of the closest person next to him for comfort and accidentally ending up with Eddie’s instead of Robin’s. This is a recipe for disaster. 

“Not sure he would be so keen to be a part of movie night.”

“Maybe not,” a dangerous grin grows on Robin’s face. “But I’m sure he won’t want to miss the opportunity to see you scream like a little girl.” 

“Oh ha ha, very funny,” Steve rolls his eyes. “As if you didn’t almost break my arm when we watched Alien .” 

“You mean when I watched Alien . You just had your eyes closed behind your hands the entire time.” 

Steve can’t argue with that. He snags a KitKat from the candy display and offers half of it to Robin. 

“Why do I put up with you again?”

“Because you love meeee,” Robin sings and takes the Kitkat. 

He does, he truly loves Robin. She is the best friend he’s ever had and he wants her to be happy. So he suggests, “You should bring Vickie too, let's have a double date.” 

It was meant as a joke, but by the way Robin’s eyes narrow for the briefest of seconds Steve can tell that the punchline didn’t land. 

“Sure, I’ll ask her tonight,” she says after a pause that was slightly too long. 

It’s not bad if she finds out, it’s not bad if she finds out, Steve reminds himself. It’s just that he himself is not ready to unpack all the boxes yet. Thankfully, Robin doesn’t enquire further. He’ll tell her soon. Just not today. 

The rest of their day is rather quiet as it is during most summer days. People are busy going to pools, having BBQs, or choosing the local drive-in cinema over rented tapes. 

Five minutes before their shift ends, Keith pops his head out of his office. 

“Here is the new schedule for this week,” he says and hands Steve a piece of paper. “Someone call the new guy and let him know when to come in, I’ve got more important things to do.” 

Before Steve can protest, Keith has already disappeared back into his office and locked the door. Fantastic. 

Steve looks at Robin, but she just shakes her head. 

“C’mon, Robin,” Steve tries to hand her the schedule but she refuses to take it. “ You were the one to make him the offer.”

“Yeah, and I am busy tonight calling Vickie,” she says and chucks off her vest. The clock on the wall says 5 pm and both of them are finally free. “And this way you can also invite Eddie for movie night.” 

“Sure,” Steve sighs, knowing there is no point in arguing with Robin. At this point, he just wants to make it out of the store and home. 

He drops Robin off, quickly stops at the gas station to get a six-pack of beer and then drives home. After last night the house seems even more empty than usual. Quickly, Steve pops a tape into his stereo and turns the volume up to muffle the echo of his feet on the ice-cold tiles. Elton John promises Steve that he would buy them a big house if he had the money as Steve shoves the beer into the fridge and examines the food he has left. He really should have done a grocery run today, but between getting no sleep last night and working at Family Video Steve just doesn’t have the energy. 

He grabs a granola bar and stares at his phone. He should get this over with, there is no point in procrastinating it. The call isn’t going to go away magically. 

Steve takes a bite of the granola bar and grimaces at how dry it is, before punching in Eddie’s number. It rings four times before Eddie picks up. 

“Hello?” is all he says. He sounds weary like he isn’t trusting whoever is on the other end of the line. Steve can’t blame him, he assumes Eddie has gotten his fair share of prank calls or worse since having been a person of interest in a murder case. 

“It’s Steve…Harrington?” Steve stutters and instantly flushes with embarrassment. As if Eddie wouldn’t know that it was him.

“I knew you were clingy, Harrington,” Steve can literally hear Eddie smirk through the phone. “But this is a bit much. It’s only been six hours since I last saw you.” 

“Oh, so you’ve been counting?” Steve throws back. Nervously he wraps the telephone cord around his fingers. 

“Of course, if I have too much exposure to you my brain might mutate and I’ll start liking Journey or worse, Tears for Fears. ” 

“Well lucky for you then, your first shift tomorrow at ten is with Robin and not me,” Steve says as he flips through Keith’s schedule. Fortunately, he won’t have to work together with Eddie until Thursday.  

“Alright,” Eddie hums. “Is that why you called? To tell me my shifts?” 

There is something in his voice that Steve can’t quite decipher. 

“Eh….and you’re invited to movie night this Friday,” Steve adds. “Robin’s idea. Vickie is coming too.” 

For a moment the line is quiet and Steve is worried Eddie might have hung up. Then he clears his throat. 

“What are we watching?” 

“Whatever horror flick Robin picks,” Steve says and unties the telephone cord from his fingers. It has left a glowing red mark. “Unless you want to fight her about it.” 

“Depends on what she picks,” Eddie chuckles. “Movie night happening at hers or yours?”

“Mine, 8 pm, don’t be late.” 

“Wouldn’t dream of it, Harrington. I’ll see you then.” 

Steve is about to point out that they will see each other on Thursday too, but Eddie has already hung up. Steve stares at the phone for a second as if it would magically put Eddie back through and then hangs it back on the handle. 

Friday night is going to be a disaster, he can feel it. 

Notes:

I hope you enjoyed this chapter, if you did feel free to leave comments/kudos they water my crops <33

Chapter 3: You don't have to be rich

Eddie knows that he is not a particularly brave man. Still, after facing Vecna, playing Metallica in a storm of demobats and almost dying, it seems ridiculous that a shift at a video store should have him so on edge. 

He smokes about 3 cigarettes a minute the morning before his shift and he does consider a joint, but he knows he can’t show up high to his first day of work. He doesn’t even care that much about getting something wrong or screwing up the register. He just isn’t looking forward to the customers and their dirty glances. Usually, when someone looks at him like he is a freak, Eddie leans into it. Pulling grimaces, starting to mumble Latin chants, anything to freak the other person out more. But he knows that wouldn’t fly at Family Video. And as much as he doesn’t really care about getting into trouble at the store, he does need the money. 

People have been buying less from him since the whole Chrissy thing and parties that he knows Jason goes to are off limits for Eddie. He still has most of his regulars and he has been expanding to college parties in neighboring towns, but the drive is almost never worth the effort. 

And so he is standing in front of Family Video, five minutes to ten trying to hide how much his hands are shaking. Thankfully, Robin shows up perfectly on time. Her bright smile and the quick hug she gives Eddie manage to calm him down slightly. 

“Happy that Steve managed to tell you the right times for your shift,” she grins and digs through her bag looking for the key. “He once told me all of Keith’s shifts instead of mine. Keith has atrocious handwriting and Steve…well he struggles with reading sometimes. Says the letters move around on the page.”

Eddie nods understandingly. He too sometimes struggles with reading. Not because he can’t make out the words, but because his mind loses all focus if he’s not interested. It sometimes feels impossible to concentrate, no matter how much he tries. 

“Well, maybe I should check the rest of them once we are inside,” he says and Robin hums in approval, hands still rummaging. 

“Aha,” she calls out and holds up the keys once she has found them. “Steve also told you about Friday?” 

“Yeah, I got the invitation for the double date,” Eddie snorts and Robin gives him a funny look suddenly. “What?”

“Did Steve call it a double date when he invited you?” She asks as she unlocks the front door. 

“What? No, I was joking,” Eddie clarifies, puzzled about Robin’s question.  “Why would Harrington call it a double date?” 

Robin’s frown deepens and Eddie can basically hear the gears spinning in her mind. 

“Well he called it a double date too,” she says, still half in thought and Eddie trips over the threshold of the front door. 

What? 

“You alright?”

Why would Harrington call it a double date?  Eddie can already feel his brain spiraling again. 

“Sorry, he called it what?” 

“As a joke .” Something about the way Robin says it, makes Eddie feel like there is more to it. Or at least that Robin thinks that there is more to it. 

He really shouldn’t get so worked up over this. So Harrington joked about it being a double date. Big deal.  Eddie literally just made the same joke. They share a sense of humor, shocker. 

The only reason Eddie feels weird about this is because of their stupid almost kiss at the party, which wasn’t even an almost kiss probably. Steve had no intention of kissing him. Though Eddie did notice Steve staring at his lips yesterday. It’s something Steve has been doing more and more recently, staring. Or maybe he has always had a staring problem and Eddie just hadn’t noticed because he and Steve had lived in two very different worlds before Vecna. 

Either way, he needs to stop thinking about Steve. Fortunately, his new job allows for ample distractions. 

“Can you check all the returned tapes and sort them in rewound and not rewound?” Robin asks him and points at the full cart behind her. “I’ll show you how the computer system works afterwards.”

It’s an easy, meaningless, dull task but at least it keeps Eddie busy. That is until he has to rewind Maurice and ends up staring at Hugh Grant’s huge shock of brown hair. That is where Hugh Grant’s similarities with Steve start and already end but it’s enough to put Steve back on his mind. 

It was just a joke Harrington made, he tells himself. Part of their little back and forth. The double date doesn’t mean anything. Just like their back and forth doesn’t mean anything. Eddie likes to rile Steve up and Steve likes to rile up Eddie in return. Though Steve obviously has no idea how much his little flirty remarks are getting to Eddie…..unless he does? 

“You didn’t tell Steve, did you?” he asks as he sorts the tapes back into the shelves with Robin, who is more busy reading the synopses of the tapes than actually putting them back.   

“Didn’t tell him what?” She asks and looks up from The Breakfast Club.

“That I’m queer?” Eddie lowers his voice even though no customer is in the store. 

“You know I would never!” Robin says so earnestly that Eddie feels almost a tad bad for asking. He trusts Robin and he knows that she would never out him. But Steve Harrington has weaseled himself into Eddie’s brain and he bought a mountain of paranoia-filled baggage with him. “You know he wouldn’t mind, right? If you told him?” Robin adds more softly. 

“I know he is cool with you,” Eddie sighs and pushes a strand of his hair against his lip. “But most straight guys get pretty uncomfortable when it’s about gay guys. Especially when it’s a gay guy that has been fake hitting on him to get him riled up.” 

“I really don’t think Steve would be uncomfortable,” Robin murmurs and takes the last tape off the cart. “But if you are so worried you could just stop fake hitting on him.” 

Eddie stops and stares at her while her fingers glide over the back of the tapes on the shelves, trying to find the right spot. Sure, he could stop hitting on Steve. But the thing is, he doesn’t really want to. Making a flirty comment and seeing a pink blush spreading over Steve Harrington’s pretty face like a teenage girl is one of the few delights Eddie currently has left in life. And so are the occasional moments when Steve does not succumb to the burning in his cheeks and he does give Eddie a flirty response. Eddie has no delusions that Harrington means what he says, but either way, his words settle warmly in the pit of Eddie’s stomach. 

It’s precisely for that reason that he should stop, that warm feeling. He knows the warm feeling can very easily grow until it has spread its vines to Eddie’s chest and blooms in his heart. It is already getting dangerously close. That moment at the party should have been Eddie’s warning shot, but he has always been excellent at ignoring warning signs and making bad decisions. And flirting with Steve Harrington when he knows it’s going to eventually bite him in the ass is an especially bad decision. 

“Now where would be the fun in that?”  

Robin finally puts the tape away and gives him yet another look. Maybe Steve doesn’t really have a staring problem, maybe it’s just everyone who works in Family Video. 

“Eddie, do you like Steve?” 

Fuck.

“Well, I don’t completely hate his guts,” Eddie attempts to say casually even though his lungs feel like he is diving for the bottom of Lovers Lake again. “And he has a pretty nice house.” 

“You know what I mean,” Robin says, unimpressed, and he knows he’ll have to tell her something. 

“I don’t fall for straight guys,” he answers curtly. Not anymore. He is aware that the whole situation with Steve is a balancing act on a tightrope slicked with oil, but Eddie means it. He is not going to fall for Steve. At least not any further. “He does look good covered in blood and with his shirt off though.” 

“Ugh gross,” Robin shivers. “And here I thought I would finally work with the only other person in Hawkins who doesn’t want to get into Steve Harrington’s pants.” 

“Hey, I might think he is attractive, after all, I have eyes,” Eddie smirks and Robin rolls her eyes. “But I have no intentions of getting into Harrington’s pants. As I said, I don’t do straight guys.” He pauses for a moment. “Literally.” 

Robin gives him an amused snort, but he can tell that she is once again thinking about something very hard that he isn’t privy to. Eddie wouldn’t mind, but ever since Chrissy he hates it when people get lost in thought, their eyes going all blank, their faces expressionless. 

“Robs?” he asks and she thankfully snaps out of it. 

“Right, let's get you worked into the computer,” she gives him a smile and drags him back behind the counter. 

The rest of Eddie’s first shift goes surprisingly well. No one stares or sneers at him, Robin is as always good company and at the end of the day he didn’t even screw up the register. 

His shift with Steve on Thursday on the other hand is a lot worse. Not because of Steve. Eddie can handle hanging out with Steve for 8 hours no problem. Even though every time Steve needs to get past him and touches his lower back, Eddie’s feet lose more and more hold on the tightrope. 

No, the Thursday shift is worse because on Thursdays Family Video has a deal with Enzo’s. Rent three videos, get one pizza at half price. The store is bustling like a bee hive. Never-ending queues in front of the counter, non-stop questions about where which tape is, and so many customers that their computer begins to smoke slightly. Of course, Thursday also has to be the hottest day of the summer. 

Eddie is drenched in sweat when he and Steve finally lock the store at 9 pm. His t-shirt and vest are sticking to his back, his jeans cling to his legs and Eddie regrets with every fiber of his being that he didn’t bring a hair tie. 

“I’m never moving again,” he groans as he leans against his van. His head is swimming slightly and his vision blurs for a moment. He is very glad that he decided to lean against the van for support.  It’s nothing unusual, he’s been dealing with dizzy spells on and off since Vecna. Almost getting torn to shreds by demobats leaves apparently more than a couple of scars on his abdomen. Steve is leaning against his own car which just happens to be parked right next to Eddie’s. 

“You have a movie night to attend tomorrow,” he points out with a tired smile and offers a water bottle he has fished out of the trunk of his car to Eddie. 

Right. The double date.  

Grateful, he takes the bottle from Steve and almost completely empties it in one go. He drinks it so greedily that some water is spilling over his lips and running down his throat. It’s a delightful feeling. The dizziness finally stops. 

“Shit, sorry,” he says once he has put the bottle down and notices that Steve is staring at him. “Didn’t mean to drink almost all of it.” 

Steve is still staring and Eddie is burning to say something along the lines of like what you see Harrington? But he does feel a little bit too guilty about the water. He does however raise one eyebrow pointedly. 

Steve blinks out of his stare. Eddie would love to know if it is just the oppressive summer heat that is making Steve flush like that. 

“It’s fine man,” Steve very deliberately avoids looking at Eddie. “I’ve got another one.” 

Demonstratively, he gets another one out of his car and takes a big sip. 

“Thanks, Harrington,” Eddie says before he gets an idea and an impish grin spreads on his lips. He looks at the last bit of water in the bottle and without hesitation lifts the bottle and pours the water over his head. 

He has his eyes closed as the cool water runs over his face, down his neck, and soaks his shirt. He parts his lips and sighs.  Next to him, he can hear Steve choke on his own water. It’s a very satisfying noise. One point for Eddie. 

When he opens his eyes Steve is of course back to staring at him again. He is so easy to play. 

“We can’t all have our own private pool, Stevie,” Eddie teases and crushes the empty water bottle in his hand. 

For some reason that is the wrong thing to say, because the expression on Steve’s face switches from stunned to sour. Maybe it’s some upper-middle-class guilt? 

“We really need to get the AC fixed in the store,” he changes the topic. “I’ll give Keith a call about it tonight. See ya, tomorrow.” 

With that, he rushes into his car, and before Eddie can say anything else Steve has driven off. 

“Alright, no more bringing up the stupid pool Munson,” he mutters to himself and bangs his hand against his van. 

The sour expression thankfully has vanished when Eddie shows up at Steve’s house the next day and he is greeted with a smile instead. 

“Come in, Robin’s in the kitchen,” Steve informs Eddie as he closes the door behind him. 

Steve’s house is not any less impressive the second time around. It’s modern, monochrome, and reeks of money. It’s also too tidy. Eddie’s trailer is filled with clutter and even though it's tiny it’s also cozy. And it feels like home. Steve’s house seems more like a museum than a place to live in. Maybe that’s why his parents are always gone. 

The kitchen is no different. Last time Eddie was panicking too much to take it really in. But now he feels like he walked into a showroom instead of an actual kitchen that gets cooked in. The counters are neatly filled with the newest kitchen appliances, but other than the microwave they seem completely unused. Maybe an alarm will go off if someone comes too close to the juicer. It doesn’t even smell like a kitchen. Instead of spices, oil, and coffee the only smell that hangs in the air is one of cleaning products. 

Robin lounges on one of the kitchen stools, flicking through the pizza take-out menu and giving Eddie a little wave when he comes in. 

“You want a beer?” Steve offers and walks past Eddie straight to the fridge. Of course, he briefly touches Eddie’s lower back as he walks past. 

“Sure,” Eddie says. “I do gotta drive home though.” 

“Dutifully noticed,” Steve gives a little salute before handing Eddie his beer. He is such a dork, Eddie smiles into his beer and takes a sip. How he got to be King Steve of Hawkins High is a mystery to Eddie. 

“So what’s the game plan for tonight?” he asks as Robin jumps off her chair, walks to Steve, and takes the beer out of his hand to have her own sip. Even though he knows that they are as thick as thieves, it still surprises Eddie sometimes just how close and comfortable Robin and Steve are. 

“We order pizza and watch Nightmare on Elm Street?” Steve says slowly, his voice implying that Eddie should know that that is the plan. Eddie rolls his eyes. 

“I mean what is the game plan for Vickie and Robin tonight?” 

Steve and Robin both look at each other helplessly, before Robin shrugs and turns back to Eddie. 

“There isn’t really one?” 

“So what you mean is it’s going to be another night of you two pining from afar? Giving each other yearning glances when the other isn’t looking, exchanging flirty quips loaded with subtext neither of you is willing to unpack, brushing your hands accidentally, and having a heart attack about it? Just to go your separate ways home still wondering if the other one is into you or not?” Eddie ends his dramatic speech with an unimpressed look. This way Robin and Vickie are never going to get together. 

“You sound very familiar with that kind of situation,” Robin says with a hint of smugness and Eddie is just going to ignore what she is trying to imply. “Any advice on how I get out of it?” 

“Outright ask her,” Eddie suggests, already knowing that Robin is never ever just going to ask Vickie if she likes girls. And just like expected Robin shakes her head.

“Ugh this is hopeless,” she groans and presses her cheek against the cool top of the kitchen island. Because of course, Steve’s kitchen has a kitchen island. “Steve?”

“Sneak your arm around her during the movie?” 

Eddie isn’t surprised that sneaking an arm around Vickie is Steve’s best idea. The move must have worked on countless girls in Hawkins for him. But this is different. Between two girls an arm around the shoulder could be considered just some platonic affection, nothing more. 

“Jesus, this isn’t middle school, Harrington,” Eddie huffs. “They shared a bed and nothing happened. Sneaking an arm around Vickie isn’t going to cut it.” 

“Make a better suggestion then,” Steve shrugs and takes his beer back from Robin. 

Eddie considers what he knows about Robin, Vickie, and communicating to someone of the same gender that you like them. 

“Have you ever shotgunned someone, Robs?” he asks, and next to Robin Steve chokes on his beer. Apparently, making Steve choke on drinks is becoming a habit. 

“Eh…no? I mean I’ve smoked weed before. You know that I’ve bought some from you. And I had the occasional joint at a party. Never shotgunned though. There was never really the opportunity. Well, it was offered once by Fred Myers, but I obviously wasn’t into him so I declined,” Robin rambles, and Steve, who has recovered from choking on his drink, tries to hide a smile behind his hand.

“Perfect,” Eddie interrupts Robin and gets out two joints he had rolled earlier that day. “Because Vickie is one of my semi-regular customers for weed and I’ve seen her at band parties. She definitely knows how to shotgun.” 

Robin’s eyes grow almost comically large as she realizes what Eddie is suggesting. 

“You think she’d go for that?” she asks unsure and keeps staring at the joints in Eddie’s hand. 

“Definitely,” Steve speaks before Eddie can say anything. “It’s a classic move.” 

“And as opposed to the whole sneaking the arm thing, it actually works foolproof,” Eddie adds and Steve flips him off. 

It’s that moment that the doorbell rings. Robin’s face quickly twists into panic, but Steve gives her a reassuring pat on the back. 

“It’s gonna be fine,” he tells her while walking to the door. “It’s just Vickie. Who likes you very much.” 

Vickie gives all of them a quick hug, but Eddie notices that she lingers with Robin. When she lets go her hands briefly brush over Robin’s. God, these two better get their shit together tonight. 

They all sit cramped together on Steve’s couch. As stylish as Eddie is sure it is, it’s quite uncomfortable. Eddie tries his best to ignore how much Steve’s thigh is pressed against his own and instead tries to focus on the movie and Glen Lantz in his very short crop top. 

They are halfway through the movie when Steve lets out a yawn and stretches his arms. In one smooth motion, one of his arms lands behind Eddie’s back. Bastard. 

But as always two can play this game. Eddie shifts and shimmies slightly until he is basically snuggled against Steve. Of course, Steve then has to one-up him and begins rubbing circles with his thumb into Eddie’s shoulder. Eddie prays that Steve is not noticing the goosebumps spreading across his arms. 

It’s a good thing Eddie has seen the movie several times before because he is very much distracted and misses most of the plot. It’s only when the movie ends that Steve removes his arm to lean forward and presses rewind on the remote. 

Eddie glances over to Robin and Vickie, who are basically sitting in each other's laps at this point. Time to give them the final push. Eddie clears his throat and three pairs of eyes stare at him. 

“Does anyone want dessert?” he asks and holds up the two joints. “One for the ladies, one for Harrington and I?” 

“Ohhhh, if you’re offering,” Vickie gives him an excited smile before turning to Robin. “Whatcha think, Robs?” 

Robin smiles shyly but nods, she is playing the part of the weed novice very convincingly, Eddie thinks as he drops one of the joints into Vickie’s hand. 

“Why don’t you two already go outside, and Munson here can help me clean up?” Steve suggests and begins grabbing plates and pizza boxes. 

“You sure?” Vickie asks and Eddie nods. 

“Oh yeah, we’ve got this, you two girls go have fun. We’ll join you later,” he says and puts his and Steve’s joint into the pocket of his vest. 

“Alright then,” Vickie grins and gets up. She holds out her hand for Robin to grab and pulls her up. “Let’s go smoke.” 

“You’re actually a halfway decent wingman,” Eddie says once they are out of ear shots and helps Steve to collect the rest of the trash. “Sending them outside alone.” 

“Well, they deserve some privacy for this.” Steve kicks up the kitchen door with his food and leans against it so Eddie can follow him inside. “And unless we are at a band party where everyone is already drunk and it’s just a silly game between friends I really don’t have to watch Robin and Vickie shotgun.” 

Huh, good to know that Steve Harrington doesn’t fetishize lesbians. It’s not surprising given how close he is with Robin. But it’s good to have it confirmed. 

“Isn’t that the dream of most str-.....most guys? Watching two girls kiss?” Eddie asks while Steve puts the pile of dishes onto the kitchen island. 

“If you’re a creep maybe,” he huffs and takes the pizza boxes from Eddie’s hands. “Why? Do you wanna watch them?” 

Eddie laughs quietly and leans against the kitchen counter next to the sink. 

“I’m here with you, aren’t I, Harrington.”

Steve throws the boxes in the trash and then leans against the kitchen island right across from Eddie. They didn’t bother turning on the light and only the dim moonlight from outside is illuminating the kitchen. It makes this whole moment feel like it is wrapped in cotton and Eddie thinks he might be floating a bit even before he’s had his first hit. Some of the light is falling directly onto Steve and he looks so unfairly pretty that Eddie has to do something before he does something stupid.  

“So will we have to smoke this one outside your front door then?” he asks and holds up the joint. Steve shakes his head. 

“We can just smoke it in here.”

“You sure?” Eddie puts the joint between his lips and gets his lighter out. “‘s gonna smell up your kitchen.” 

“Maybe it’ll get that stench of chlorine and picture-perfect plastic family out of it,” Steve adds bitterly. 

Eddie raises his eyebrows and flicks open the lighter. Every time he thinks he’s gotten an idea of who Steve Harrington is, Steve, reveals yet another layer. While Eddie sure would love to have Steve’s kind of money, King Steve’s golden palace turns out to be more of a golden cage. He lights the joint and inhales. 

Eddie knows it doesn’t work that fast but he instantly feels himself relax a bit more. He exhales and Steve steps closer to him right through the smoke, unfazed. He doesn’t even cough. 

“Now, I know you smoke Harrington, so I don’t have to shotgun you, do I” Eddie grins and holds out the joint for Steve to take. 

It is then that he makes the mistake of looking up and into Steve’s eyes. He bats his stupidly long lashes and Eddie drowns in golden honey and liquid amber. 

“I’m a bit rusty,” Steve licks his lips. Eddie’s mouth has gone dry. “A demonstration might help.” 

“Oh?” Eddie swallows. There is no way Steve is serious. Steve is straight, incredibly straight, and absolutely not interested in Eddie. Maybe for Steve, this is just part of the game they’ve been playing for weeks now. Eddie pushes one of Steve’s buttons and Steve pushes one of Eddie’s buttons in return. This could just be the grand finale after weeks of teasing, flirting, sneaky touches, and long stares. 

Despite his internal panic, Eddie whispers very smoothly, “Is that so?” 

He realizes how close they are standing. His vest is almost brushing against Steve’s arm. Steve bites his lip because apparently he really wants Eddie to die and nods slowly. 

“Well in that case,” Eddie rasps. Without breaking eye contact he taps the joint and lets some ash fall into the sink. He lifts it to his lips and inhales again. Steve is shifting ever so slightly closer. Eddie is insane for this and he knows it. He is going to shotgun Steve Harrington. Here goes nothing, he decides and leans forward.  

Before their lips can meet there is a loud crash behind them. Panicked, they both fly apart, hearts beating in their throats. Don’t let it be Vecna, Eddie pleads and hectically looks for the source of the noise. 

Steve is just as much on edge, holding a kitchen knife he grabbed god knows when. But other than the two of them no one else is in the kitchen. No demogorgons, no mindflayer, no Vecna. 

A pile of their broken plates and cutlery on the kitchen floor is all there is. Eddie stares at it in disbelief. 

“Is…w-was….was that the noise?” he asks, both his voice and his body shaking. He hates how something small like the sudden sound of plates smashing has him in such a huge panic. 

“I-I…think so?” Steve stutters and lowers his knife. They stand there for a second, still in shock before they simultaneously break out in half-relieved half-hysterical laughter. 

Seconds later Robin and Vickie come rushing into the kitchen. 

“Are you alright?” Robin asks before realizing that Steve and Eddie are shaking with laughter. 

“Fine,” Steve gasps and holds his side. “Just got jump scared by a bunch of plates.” 

He points his knife at the pile of porcelain shards in front of them and Eddie continues to laugh.

“Evil monster plates,” Eddie adds and gets another giggle out of Steve. 

“How much of that weed did you have already?” Vickie grins while Robin shakes her head in disapproval. 

Ironically that question manages to sober both Steve and Eddie right up. 

“Not that much,” Eddie says flatly and looks around for the joint he dropped in the panic. Unfortunately, he dropped it right into the garbage disposal of the sink. 

“Shame,” Steve hums and it makes Eddie’s skin itch because he has no idea if he should read into that or not. Is the lost joint a shame or the lost opportunity to shotgun? Eddie begins twisting his rings to keep his hands busy.

 “Anyone up for an actual dessert? We still have chocolate ice cream in the freezer?” Steve offers. 

“We…we actually thought about going home?” Robin says sheepishly. “Got suuuuper tired from the weed. Vickie said she can drop me off. No need to drive me.”  

Both Eddie and Steve know that that is a full-on lie. But based on how swollen Robin’s lips are and how she is basically leaning against Vickie, their plan must have worked. 

“Yes, I should leave too,” Eddie turns so he is no longer standing next to Steve and more between him and the girls. “Still exhausted after last night’s shift. I’m sure Harrington doesn’t mind kicking us all out. Don’t ya Stevie?” 

“Glad to have the house finally to myself,” Steve smiles but it doesn’t reach his eyes. Eddie has no time to think about that right now. In fact, he should stop thinking about Steve Harrington altogether as soon as he is out of his house. 

Steve brings the three of them to the door. Once again Eddie is slower at getting his shoes on than the other two. Though in his defense Robin and Vickie are basically sprinting out of the door. 

“Not so subtle those two,” Steve shakes his head amused as he watches Vickie’s car leave. “But good for them.” 

“Uh-hu,” Eddie hums and gets up. He too kind of wants to sprint out of Steve’s house. “See ya soon, Harrington,” he says and turns to leave but Steve pushes his hand against the door frame, blocking Eddie’s way out. 

“Call!” He says very, very calmly. “I mean it this time, Munson.” 

“I will,” Eddie tries not to think how close they are standing again. “I also mean it this time.” 

Steve doesn’t move his hand. Eddie forces himself not to look into the Venus fly traps that are Steve’s eyes. 

“Gotta get home first though, to call you,” he says and nods towards Steve’s hand. 

Reluctantly, Steve lowers his arm and lets Eddie pass. Eddie is having quite the sense of deja-vu. He turns around and dares to look at Steve. 

He seems out of place, standing in the door of that massive house. Like it’s about to swallow him whole as soon as the front door shuts. Part of Eddie wants to stay, march back into the living room, and make Harrington feel so alive that the gray furniture of the living room turns into technicolor. The other part of Eddie wants to run. Playing hero once does not change the fact that deep down Eddie is a coward. 

“I’ll call you!” he promises instead again. Steve just nods. 

“Night, Munson.”

Eddie gives him a small, awkward wave and then, calm and collected, walks to his van. He doesn’t look up to see if Steve is watching him or not. 

The ride home is a blur. Eddie is almost surprised that he’s reached home when he pulls into the trailer park. He turns off the van, rummages through the glove box, and pulls out another joint. He doesn’t leave the van until his legs feel like jelly. 

Wayne is working, so Eddie comes home to an empty trailer. Still, it feels less gapingly deserted than Steve’s house. With a sigh, Eddie lets himself fall on his moss green, very comfortable, wide couch. His eyes land on the phone. 

A promise is a promise. Even though he really doesn’t want to do this. But he can’t get away with not calling Steve again. He remains on the couch for a moment longer, trying his best not to stare at the ceiling. It’s a new trailer. An attempt from the government to buy his silence. There are no blood stains, no traces of interdimensional gates left. Still, the spot makes Eddie uneasy. 

He finally forces himself to get up and dials Steve’s number. It rings several times. He’s just decided that it’s stupid and is about to hang up when Steve picks up. 

“Harrington residence, Steve speaking.”

“Okay, this is the reason I didn’t call last week. The fact that you answer the phone like that is ridiculous,” Eddie aims for joking, expecting Steve to retort with something equally teasing. 

But Steve doesn’t. He is quiet for a moment, before asking with a low voice, “Why didn’t you?” 

Eddie wants to say, well, you see I was panicking over the fact that we almost kissed at your party and tonight we almost kissed again and I am technically panicking right now and you have no idea how much I have to force myself to call you. But he knows that it’s not a good answer, even though it is the truth. He swallows the hysteric laughter bubbling in the back of his throat.

“I’m sorry,” he says instead and he means it. “I honestly didn’t think you cared. And I now know you do. It’s just…takes some getting used to…that people care about me.” 

It’s a different truth, but nevertheless, it is the truth. Of course, his uncle has always cared about him, but it was never enough to completely drown out the deafening chorus of people calling Eddie names and slurs, telling him to go die or suspecting him to be a satanic murderer. Getting his band together and forming Hellfire had helped slightly. But if Eddie is honest this friendship with Steve and Robin is the first real friendship he’s had since kindergarten. 

“I know you said I’m part of the team and I want to be, I really do,” he continues because Steve still hasn’t said something and Eddie has the horrible need to fill the silence. He is a lot like Robin in that regard. “But if I’m pretending like I’m not part of the team, if I don’t believe that people care then….then it eventually will suck a lot less once the team decides to kick me out.” 

Eddie has no idea why he tells Steve all this. Maybe it’s because getting high makes Eddie easily melancholic. Maybe because it’s the middle of the night and emotions feel less real and heavy the closer it is to witching hour. Maybe because doing this over the phone is just easier. Or maybe Steve just makes Eddie want to open up about himself, unlock drawers inside himself that Eddie didn’t even know he still had the key to. 

“Eddie,” Steve says so softly and Eddie hates how it makes him feel as fragile as a porcelain doll. “You’ll always be part of the team.” 

It’s too much, it’s too kind, and it’s something that Eddie cannot handle. Because Steve might think he means this, but that’s only because he doesn’t know the truth about Eddie. Once he does it’s all going to be over. Eddie is already in far too deep and he can’t allow himself to be pulled in further. Right now the worst thing Steve Harrington can do is break Eddie’s jaw, in a couple of months, it will be Eddie’s heart. 

“I’m queer.” 

Eddie holds his breath. This sure was a stupid decision. But probably less stupid than coming out to Steve in person. Steve can’t punch him right now. If he gets angry about it and decides to show up at Eddie’s trailer, Eddie has time enough to run. Maybe, he should have just stayed quiet, the same way Steve is staying quiet on the other end of the line right now. 

Eddie has no idea if this is good silence or bad silence. His hands are shaking. He hopes Steve can’t hear the telephone cord banging against the wall. After what might have been five seconds or five minutes, Steve finally speaks. 

“Did you miss the part where we tried to set up Robin and Vickie for the majority of the night?” 

Eddie almost drops the phone. It’s not what he expected Steve to say. To be fair, he doesn’t really know what he had expected Steve to say. Hoping for Steve to be instantly accepting had felt naive, but as much as he was scared of Steve’s answer he also hadn’t pecked Steve for an aggressive homophobe. But Steve seems to be actually okay with this? 

“For most guys, it’s something different with two girls,” Eddie mumbles, still trying to process that Steve apparently isn’t bothered. 

“Well, I’m not most guys now, am I, Munson,” the teasing tone is back in Steve’s voice and Eddie feels like crying. 

“No, you’re truly something else, Harrington.” It’s a touch too honest but what is one more little truth after this plethora of confessions. 

“I’m glad you called,” Steve says, his voice equally raw. “And thank you for telling me.” 

Eddie hesitates for a moment. Steve literally just said it's alright, but all the build-up anxiety and worry that has been gnawing on Eddie doesn’t just evaporate like that. 

“Steve, this isn’t going to change things is it?” He can’t help but ask. 

“Only if you decide to bring a boyfriend to movie night because then I’ll have to buy a bigger couch,” Steve chuckles and Eddie can’t help but grin. 

“I wouldn’t worry about that,” he sighs melodramatically, before sinking down the wall with his back to sit on the floor. “Slim pickings in Hawkins. And believe it or not the murder charges don’t really make you appealing in the world’s smallest dating pool.” 

“Well the world's smallest dating pool is clearly missing out then,” Steve says and Eddie wants to grab a pillow, press it against his face, and scream. “But I guess I won’t get a new couch then.” 

“Not on my account, no. Though it’s uncomfortable as shit” Eddie mumbles before an unpleasant thought occurs to him. “Unless of course, you start bringing a girlfriend.” 

To his surprise, Steve lets out a laugh. 

“I don’t know why you think I’m some sort of Hawkins Casanova, but Robin really wasn’t wrong when she said I don’t have many second dates.” 

Eddie finds that really fucking hard to believe. It’s Steve Harrington after all. Attractive, funny, kind, good with kids, bit of a dumbass sometimes but in an endearing way. There is no way not all of Hawkins’ eligible bachelorettes are begging Steve to take them out. And Steve is good at flirting, whether it's fake flirting with Eddie or actual flirting with someone he is into. So a date with Steve Harrington can’t possibly be so horrible that not one girl in Hawkins wants to be his girlfriend. 

“Uhm…because all the single girls in Hawkins constantly make heart eyes at you? Personally, I’m already dreading having to put up with them when we work our next shift together.”

“Would you rather they make heart eyes at you?”

“Flattery works with me, even if I am not interested.” 

“Good to know,” Steve chuckles and once again Eddie wants to yell why is that good to know Harrington down the phone. “But it’s not that most girls don’t want to go out with me. It’s more that… I don’t want to.”  

“God, of course, you must have impossibly high standards, Harrington.”  

“Not really?” Steve hesitates. “I just don’t click with the girls I go on dates with? I don’t know why. I guess maybe the idea of dating someone…normal…someone who has no idea what’s going on after everything that happened just feels strange.” 

Eddie hums in agreement. He’s only been through it once and he already struggles to be around people who don’t know about the upside down. A lot of the time he wishes he could tell Wayne. He would probably understand if he believed Eddie. But he doesn’t want to burden his uncle with that. Or god forbid get him involved once the upside down has decided to no longer be idle again. 

“Last time I went on a date one of the lights in the restaurant flickered. I almost had a panic attack. Try to explain that to someone uninvolved,” Steve laughs bitterly and for the first time, Eddie wishes they wouldn’t have this conversation on the phone, so he could give Steve a pat on the back or even a hug. 

“I can’t even do hookups anymore,” Steve sighs and Eddie has to bite the inside of his cheeks to keep his mind from picturing things. 

“Last time I checked an emotional connection is rather counter-productive for casual sex,” he points out, getting another chuckle out of Steve, but a genuine one this time. 

“Yeah, but so is being littered with scars and waking up screaming in the middle of the night because of nightmares.” 

The sentence makes Eddie freeze. He hasn’t had a proper night's sleep since they killed Vecna so it shouldn’t surprise him that Steve isn’t sleeping well either. Steve seems so put together though like nothing is really ever fazing him. But apparently, Eddie once again has read Steve completely wrong. Because Cyrillic is easier to decipher than Steve Harrington. 

“You could call if you wanna?” Eddie hears himself say and briefly considers banging the telephone handle against his head. Instead, to his horror, he hears himself continue to speak, “Might help, talking with someone who knows what it is like. The upside down and...nightmares and stuff.” 

“I don’t want to wake your uncle by calling in the middle of the night,” Steve sounds like he is actually considering Eddie’s offer though. 

“He works night shifts so he isn’t in until 8 am.”

“Alright…thanks,” Steve mumbles. “You can call too when you have nightmares.”

He offers this with such tenderness in his voice, Eddie feels like he might dissolve in it. He’s worked so hard to build up the walls around him and to keep them up. And yet it takes one sentence, one nice gesture from Steve and Eddie’s walls begin to crumble like a house of cards. This is going to ruin him. 

“Not if you’re going to answer the phone with Harrington Residence, Steve speaking ,” Eddie jokes because one more emotionally heavy sentence just might be the end of him.  

“I do not have a fake British accent when I answer the phone,” Steve gasps indignantly, but Eddie can hear that Steve is struggling not to laugh. “But sure. For you Munson I can pick up the phone like a wild animal.” 

“Well since you already look like one with all that chest hair.”

“Shut up.” This time Steve laughs. “People dig the chest hair I have you know.”

“Hmmm, yes people also tend to lie, Stevie,” Eddie snickers, even though—and he of course would never admit that—Steve is right. The chest hair suits him very well and the mental image of Steve standing shirtless on that boat on Lovers Lake has snuck into Eddie’s mental nighttime catalog one too many nights. 

“Too far, Munson, too far,” Steve says with a low chuckle and Eddie can’t stop grinning into the phone. 

“My most humble apologies, Harrington.” 

They are quiet for a moment, both just sitting on other ends of the city, phones in hand, having never felt closer even though there are miles between them. 

“Speaking off, we should probably go to bed,” Steve yawns, and Eddie can feel the tiredness aching in his bones. 

He nods before he realizes that Steve can’t see him obviously. 

“Yeah, let’s do it,” he hurries to say. “Night, Harrington. 

“Night, Munson.”  

With that Steve hangs up and Eddie is left with silence. He continues to sit on the floor for a moment, considering just crashing here, but he knows both Wayne and his bones are gonna be mad at him for that in the morning. So with a deep sigh, he gets up and puts the phone back on the hook. 

Steve doesn’t mind, he thinks as he drags himself to his room. Steve knows and he doesn’t mind. Eddie lets out a little giggle. Now he just needs to make sure that he doesn’t do anything stupid that will screw up their friendship. Like getting a crush on Steve. 

Eddie grabs a pillow, presses it into his face, and groans, well knowing that that ship is leaving the harbor, ready to sail. 

Notes:

Hope you enjoyed this chapter, I sure went insane writing it. If you did feel free to leave comments/kudos, they always brighten my day and make me type so much faster <3

Chapter 4: You don′t have to be cool

Notes:

Okay, a few disclaimers:

- The word padawan did already exist in 1973 however it wasn't used until the Star Wars prequels, but I don't care my fic my rules
- Both The Princess Bride and Elvira were released in 1988, but once again my fic my rules
- If you have not seen The Princess Bride all you need to know is that the two main characters in it always say "as you wish" when they mean I love you

That's all, enjoy this one folks!

Steve can’t sleep. That’s nothing new. Steve can’t sleep because he is busy thinking about Eddie. That’s also nothing new. But for once it’s not worries and the threat of potential nightmares featuring Eddie’s grim demise in the eye of a demobat storm that keep Steve awake. 

Instead, Steve’s mind is occupied thinking about the red glow of the joint between Eddie’s lips in the blue hue of his kitchen, drawing Steve closer to Eddie like prey to an anglerfish.  And for the briefest second, it had felt like Eddie was about to devour him whole and Steve would have let him. Then the stupid pile of plates had to fall off the counter. 

And now Steve can’t stop thinking about what Eddie’s lips pressed against his own would have felt like. Eddie’s hot mouth on Steve’s neck, Steve’s fingers in Eddie’s long hair, Eddie’s hands gripping Steve’s hips so tightly it would leave marks. The cool metal of Eddie’s rings on Steve’s jaw, the sharpness of his teeth grazing over Steve’s skin. Would he push Steve roughly against a wall and nudge a leg between his thighs? Or would he tenderly place his index finger under Steve’s chin and lift it up gently to kiss him? Steve can’t remember the last time his imagination has been so vivid. 

His bedroom is unbearably hot. Sweat is running down his body, making his hair stick to his neck and the sheets cling to his back. The blanket feels like it’s choking him. But once he has kicked it off it’s his thoughts about Eddie that sit heavy on his chest, making it impossible to breathe. 

Maybe he could have dealt with it. Spend a sweaty night, hands buried in his boxers, face pressed into his pillow, muffling the sound of Eddie’s name on his lips, getting it all out of his system. In the morning he could have taken the memory of that night, wrapped it in bubble wrap made out of denial and shoved it between two of the Eddie boxes in his mind, letting it sit and sit and sit until it had gathered dust.

But then Eddie had called him and caused the boxes to explode. Now Steve’s mind looks like a winter wonderland, every inch covered in black-on-white incriminating evidence of how much he likes Eddie Munson. 

Eddie Munson, who could possibly like Steve back because apparently he too likes guys? The thought pulls another groan from Steve’s lips. He shouldn’t get his hopes up. They might be quite close now, but a couple of weeks ago Eddie didn’t even consider them friends yet. And with all that Steve knows about Eddie, he very much doubts that Eddie’s type is a polo shirt-wearing former popular douchebag now video store employee by day and babysitter by night. 

Eddie did almost kiss him though. 

“Nope, no, no, not fucking doing this,” Steve mutters at himself and crosses his arms in front of his chest. “Nope!” 

He just about managed to deal with having a sexuality crisis. He’s known for a while that he likes both guys and girls, admitting it to himself had been long overdue. But now having to deal with a liking Eddie Munson crisis is too much. Steve stares at his clock. 7:30 am. Neither he nor Robin are morning people. But fuck it, he needs to talk to her. 

He drags himself out of bed and under the shower, hoping to get some clarity under the cold stream of water. He still has no idea what to do, think, or feel when he emerges from the bathroom. But at least the icy water has gotten rid of the sweat and another slightly awkward problem. 

Still, just in case he puts on a pair of jeans instead of shorts, grabs a cream-coloured polo and rushes to the door to drag Robin out for breakfast. He opens his front door and lets out a startled little yell. Robin’s beaten him to it. She is standing at his front door, hand already raised to knock, looking equally as startled as Steve. 

“Where are you off to?” She asks at the same time as Steve goes, “How did you get here?”

“I walked.”

“Robin, you live at the other end of town!” 

“Yeah, but Vickie only lives a mile away from you,” a very wide grin spreads over Robin’s face. 

Steve blinks at her, confused for a second before realization hits him. She is still wearing the same clothes she left Steve’s place in last night. 

“Ohhh, you…you and her,” he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively and gets Robin to chuckle.

“Yes, I stayed the night,” she blushes but looks incredibly happy and it's infectious. 

“Took you two long enough,” he teases and she smacks him gently. “I’m happy for you Robin, I really am!” 

“Shush,” her face turns redder and redder every second. “Now where are you off to?” She changes the topic. 

“Oh, actually to get you,” Steve holds up his car keys. “Breakfast?” 

“God, yeah I’m starving,” she nods enthusiastically and follows Steve down to the driveway. 

“So? Tell me everything?” Steve prompts her while she goes through the tapes he keeps in his car and ends up picking ABBA. 

“I mean there isn’t that much to tell,” she shrugs. “I told her I had never smoked before, she told me how to do it. I played dumb and then asked her about shotgunning. And then we kissed. Quite a lot. Like a lot a lot actually. If you hadn’t broken those plates, Steve…” she trails off with a grin and it’s Steve's turn to blush. 

“I didn’t break them,” he mumbles quietly. “Really, could have done without them breaking actually.” 

He can feel Robin’s eyes on him, waiting for him to elaborate, but he is not ready for that yet. Not before he’s had a cup of coffee and a slice of toast in his twisting and turning stomach. 

 “Anyways,” Robin continues, “Vickie then told me her parents weren’t home and we went to hers. As for the rest of the night, a lady doesn’t kiss and tell.”  

They reach their favorite little diner at the edge of town. It’s always pretty empty even though it does the best-scrambled eggs and the crispiest bacon in all of Indiana. 

“Or well, a lady does kiss,” Robin grins as she gets out of the car. “She just doesn’t tell.” 

Steve shakes his head amused, it’s moments like this when he is so fond of his best friend, that his chest hurts a little. 

“So if a lady does kiss,” he asks as they fall into their usual booth. “Then why are you not still at Vickie’s place having…morning kisses?” 

Before Robin can answer, a waitress comes over and they order their usual: Robin chocolate chip pancakes, drenched in whip cream and Steve scrambled eggs, almost burned toast and an extra side of bacon. They are here so often that the waitress doesn’t even bother taking the coffeepot with her and just places it on the table between the two. 

“There would have been morning kisses,” Robin lowers her voice slightly. The jukebox is playing loudly and there is almost no one else in the diner to overhear them. “But Vickie volunteers at the vet clinic and had to go. And I obviously wanted to talk to you.” 

“So are there going to be more kisses?” 

“We are meeting up tonight again,” Robin blushes again and oh Steve is going to have so much fun with this. It’s usually quite hard to get Robin flustered. 

Their food arrives and Robin digs into her pancakes ravenously. Steve just pokes his scrambled eggs with his fork. His stomach still revolts at the idea of eating anything. Robin lifts her head from her pancakes and gives Steve a concerned look. 

“Okay as much as I want to gush about Vickie, Steve you look like you’ve committed a murder and can’t quite bring yourself to ask me to get rid of the body.” 

“Would you get rid of the body?” Steve asks to stall for some time. He isn’t sure he can do this. Killing demon monsters, going to alternative planes of existence, and fighting Vecna are all scary things, but somehow they seem easier to do than telling his best friend that he likes boys. 

“Of course, I would get rid of the body!” Robin steals a piece of bacon from his plate. “But that’s not what’s eating you is it?” 

Steve chews on his bottom lip trying to find a way of telling Robin. It shouldn’t be this hard. Five little words: I like guys and girls. But with every passing second, Steve feels like cement is slowly pouring down his throat and hardening in his chest. 

Robin’s eyes soften and she squeezes Steve’s hand gently. 

“Steve,” she whispers, “whatever it is you can tell me.” 

And she is right. Steve trusts her with his life. He can trust her with this. He takes one last deep breath. 

“I know about Eddie and I think you know too, it would make a lot of sense if you knew too. Like the different kind of good friend, you said he is? I know why he is a different kind of good friend,” Steve blurts. Robin’s eyes narrow and she takes her hand off Steve’s. 

“Do you think you know? Or do you know you know?” she asks enunciating very clearly. 

“No, I know know. Eddie told me,” Steve clarifies. “He just didn’t tell me if you knew.”  

“Well, we sure didn’t bond over band practice and Dnd,” Robin snorts and leans back against the booth. “Wait, why is that eating at you though? I swear to god if you have a problem with Eddie now—”

“No!” Steve almost yells. “No, no, no I don’t have a problem with it. Of course not,” he hisses. 

“Then what’s up?” 

There is no way back now. Steve swallows and tries to ground himself. It’s going to be alright. 

“You know how in Rocky Horror Dr Frank N’Furter has sex with both Brad and Janet?”  He tries and the piece of bacon Robin was holding falls out of her hand. 

“Oh my god, I knew you didn’t rent Raiders of the Lost Ark so much for the plot.”

Steve’s face grows hot. Robin knows him far too well sometimes. 

“It’s a good movie,” he mumbles sheepishly while part of his brain is jumping up and down screaming. He’s finally told someone. He’s finally told her. 

“Oh it’s a great movie,” Robin grins. “But that doesn’t mean I want to watch it five times in three days. Unless I wanted to ogle Harrison Ford.” 

Steve snorts and finally manages to have a bite of his bacon. The taste of salty grease and relief is heavenly. 

“So you’re not surprised?” He asks, mouth still half full.  

“I had my suspicions about you being bisexual,” she simply shrugs as if she was talking about the weather and it’s Steve's turn to drop the bacon. 

“Is…is that what I am?” 

He didn’t even know there was a word for that. 

“Well you don’t have to label your sexuality if you don’t want to,” Robin takes a sip from her coffee. “But most people who like both men and women call themselves bisexual.” 

“M-most people?” 

“Steve,” Robin says incredibly gently and puts her hand back on top of Steve’s. “Did you think you and Dr Frank N’Furter were the only ones who liked both?” 

“Well and David Bowie I guess,” he admits, abashed. It’s stupid and he knows it. But he has never met another bisexual person before. Hell, other than Eddie and Robin, he has never met another gay person before. And it’s not like movies, TV shows or books are filled with bisexual characters. So Steve had mentally already prepared for a very lonely existence.  “It’s…it’s not weird that I like both?” 

“Perfectly normal,” Robin smiles softly. Then something apparently occurs to her and her smile turns from soft to diabolic. “And you started this conversation with Eddie because…?” 

“Oh Christ, Robin, do I have to spell it out?” 

Steve had kind of hoped that she had forgotten the start of their conversation at this point, but he also knows that he will feel better once he has told her. 

“Steve, I’ve once caught you flirting with a houseplant,” she gives him an unimpressed look. “I’m not going to assume that you have a crush on every single person you’ve ever flirted with.” 

“Yeah, well in this case you would be assuming correctly.” He crosses his arms grumpily and shimmies further down the booth. 

“So? You’re bisexual, you have a crush on Eddie, why are you still looking like there is a corpse in your trunk.” 

“Because Eddie likes guys.”

“Isn’t that a good thing?” 

“No, it’s absolutely fucking not a good thing!” Steve exclaims and throws his hands dramatically in the air. “I was fine with slowly admitting to myself that I liked guys and that I liked Eddie. Because I knew there was no way of anything ever happening. But now that I know that he likes guys the stakes are fucking high Robin.” 

“Steve,” Robin lets out a very exasperated sigh. “Eddie is gay and has been flirting with you for weeks now. I would say those stakes are so low you would break your back if you tried to dance limbo with them.” 

“I’m not going to assume that just because he likes guys and occasionally flirts with me, Eddie actually likes me back.” 

“Occasionally,” Robin snorts. 

“Robin you literally just said you didn’t want to assume that I had a crush on Eddie just because I like guys and flirt with him.” 

“Yeah but that’s different,” she rolls her eyes and takes the last piece of bacon from Steve’s plate. “Eddie doesn’t flirt with everything that has legs.” 

“I’m still not gonna just assume,” Steve grumbles even though Robin has a point. But then again Eddie had said that the dating pool in Hawkins was slim so of course, Robin and Steve had never seen him flirt with anyone else. “He just likes to rile me up. That’s the only reason he is flirting with me. Fake flirting with me” 

“Well if you wanna be a dumbass about it, fine,” Robin sighs and taps her fingers on the table. She contemplates something for a moment before her eyes start to have a very dangerous glint. Steve doesn’t like the look on her face one bit. 

“What?” 

“Just because you think he isn’t into you—”

“He isn’t!” 

“Just because you think he isn’t into you,” Robin repeats and rolls her eyes, “doesn’t mean he will never be into you. You just gotta flirt more, let that old, infamous Harrington charm do the work.”

Steve can tell she is laying it on thick to fuck with him. Part of Steve wants to remind her how she questioned literally all the evidence that Vickie might like boobies, so it only makes sense that he is refusing to read anything into Eddie’s behavior. 

“Very funny, fuck you,” Steve says, emptying the coffeepot. He wonders if the waitress will get them a new one. After last night he really could do with more caffeine. 

“I’m serious!” Robin insists and steals his full cup of coffee. 

“Hey!” 

“Just you know, up the whole back and forth you guys have going on,” she says, ignoring Steve’s protests. “And woo him.” 

Steve watches Robin finish his cup of coffee and thinks about it. She does have a point. Eddie might not be into him, but he could be. If Steve can manage to become Eddie’s friend, then maybe he can manage to become Eddie’s crush too. It just leaves him with one question. 

How does one woo Eddie Munson? 

Steve has still not found an answer to the question when his next shift with Eddie comes around. However, by then he has a completely different problem. Something is off with Eddie. Steve is not the most perceptive, but even he can tell that. 

Eddie greets him with a tight smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. His hands are drumming a very fast rhythm on his legs and for the first time since the beginning of spring break Eddie is respecting Steve’s personal space. It’s so unnerving in a way that Steve wants to grab Eddie’s shirt and pull him closer. 

“You good?” he asks as they grab their vests from their lockers in the back room. 

“Peachy,” Eddie says flatly and closes his locker, not even bothering to look at Steve. 

Okay, Steve must have screwed something up massively somehow for Eddie to act this way. But what? Steve is wracking his brain having no idea what he could have done wrong. The last time he spoke to Eddie was on the phone and everything seemed fine then. 

“Hey you forgot your name tag,” Steve notices the tag sitting on the desk and grabs it to hand it to Eddie. 

Eddie instantly flinches away from Steve. His eyes are blown wide in panic and he looks like he is just about to run. Instantly Steve has to think back to Eddie in the boat house. Small, fragile and afraid. Afraid of Steve. 

Very slowly Steve lifts his hand, the name tag visible in it and holds it out for Eddie. Reluctantly, Eddie reaches out before snatching the tag away. He still looks like he is expecting Steve to slam him into their lockers at any moment and Steve finally realizes why Eddie is afraid. He takes a step back to give Eddie more space. 

“I really meant it,” Steve says softly. “It doesn’t change things.” 

Or at least not in the way Eddie might think. 

Eddie finally looks up at him and Steve feels like he is coaxing a wounded wild animal to come closer. 

“I’m sorry if I made you feel like it has,” he continues but Eddie suddenly steps forward and shakes his head.

“No, no,” he cuts Steve off. “You…you haven’t. Sorry. It’s just,” he lets out a sigh and looks back at the floor. “People can change their minds….have changed their minds. I guess I was just being cautious.” 

There is so much hurt in Eddie’s voice it breaks Steve’s heart. If he could, he would grab his bat, find every single person who’s hurt Eddie and give them a taste of their own medicine. 

“And I know you’re not like other people and all that, but I’m just used to the second shoe dropping eventually and shit,” Eddie continues 

Steve could tell him right here right now. Tell Eddie that it’s alright because Steve is bisexual. Steve likes boys too. Steve likes Eddie. It would get rid of all that worry instantly. But the words have turned into bulky squares in Steve’s mouth, refusing to budge. He isn’t ready to say it. He barely managed to tell Robin, he can’t tell Eddie just yet. 

So instead Steve moves very, very, very slowly towards Eddie and as gently as possible wraps Eddie into a hug. Eddie still freezes for a second, but then he hugs Steve back. Once they let go, Eddie finally looks less shaken. 

“You know if there ever was a second shoe to drop, Robin would have my head on a stake before that shoe could reach the ground,” Steve says and gets a small smile out of Eddie. 

“I can see her go full Vlad the Impaler,” Eddie chuckles as he follows Steve to the front of the store. They were supposed to open already 10 minutes ago, but Steve couldn’t give less of a damn. 

“Who?” he asks as he flips the sign at the front door from closed to open.

“Vlad the Impaler? The guy Dracula is based on?” Eddie tries but Steve just shakes his head apologetically, having no idea who Eddie is on about. “I swear to god Harrington, do you know anything of cultural value?” 

“Literally all your cultural references revolve around guys who have very strange relationships with bats,” Steve chuckles as he grabs the broom next to the door and starts sweeping the floor. He pauses for a second before adding, “I know all the Tears for Fears songs by heart?” 

Eddie buries his face in his hands and lets out a very loud groan. It’s exactly the reaction Steve had hoped for. 

“That’s worse. You get how that is worse?” 

He looks up from his hands and Steve has a horrible idea. He lifts up the broom like it’s a microphone, wiggles his eyebrows at Eddie and starts singing, “ I wanted to be with you alone and talk about the weather. ” 

“Oh god, what are you doing?” “Oh god, what are you doing?”
 
Steve ignores Eddie’s horrified face and keeps on singing. He lifts the broom up in front of him as if it was a mic and he was Freddie Mercury.

“Harrington, stop this!” Eddie hisses, trying to sound embarrassed, but Steve can tell he is struggling not to laugh. 

So of course, Steve doesn’t stop singing, points the broom at Eddie before doing a ridiculous turn. As he reaches the chorus he swings his hips, goes down on one knee, bends his back and throws his head back, basically shouting rather than singing about being head over heels. 

He is living out his pop star fantasies and all Eddie does is break out into laughter. Steve happily lets Eddie make fun of his singing and taste in music, as long as Eddie keeps laughing like that. A little breathless Steve gets up and leans over the counter, singing the last verse directly at Eddie. “Ah, don't take my heart, don't break my heart, Don't, don't, don't throw it away.” 

 

It’s maybe too on the nose and too much, but Eddie is too busy dying of laughter than reading anything into Steve’s performance. He ends it with a little bow. 

“If that was your attempt to make me appreciate Tears for Fears Harrington, you have failed miserably. That’s the worst thing I’ve ever seen,” Eddie says once he has calmed down. 

Steve would disagree. He managed to make Eddie shake with laughter, if anything that is a win in Steve’s book. Still, he shakes his head and says with mock-offense, “You’re just a pretentious music snob, Munson.” 

“And you’re a horrible singer,” Eddie shoots back. “Now come on, we have a huge stack of tapes to rewind.” 

And just like that everything is back to normal between them. Eddie invades Steve’s personal space, Steve pokes fun at Eddie and Eddie replies something flirty back. Maybe Steve is just imagining it, but today Eddie smiles wider than before. 

And it’s such a pretty smile. It’s broad and bright and lights up his whole face. The dimple that appears alongside it drives Steve insane. He just wants to let his fingers glide over Eddie’s jaw, brush his thumb over Eddie’s dimple and press his lips against Eddie’s smile just to find out what happiness tastes like. 

“Okay Harrington, I bite,” Eddie rips him out of his thoughts. “Do I have something on my face? Or why are you staring like that?” he asks with his smile so charming, it makes Steve want to bang his head against a wall. 

“Sorry, spaced out,” Steve forces himself to look away from Eddie and grabs a spray bottle and a cloth to wipe the counter. “Just thinking.”  

Eddie lets himself fall back against the counter and props himself up on his elbows right where Steve was about to clean. 

“Thinking about how pretty my face is?”  

Yes.

“No,” Steve rolls his eyes, steps over Eddie’s legs and ignores how close they are in the cramped space behind the counter. “Lost in thought, that’s all.” 

He sprays some water on the countertop and cleans its already spotless surface. Anything to keep his hands and mind busy.   

“Hmm, must be hard for that little brain of yours. It’s probably quite out of practice.” 

Steve turns around and sprays Eddie with the cleaning bottle right in the face. Eddie gasps, affronted. Slowly, he wipes the water off his face and his neck with his hands. He pulls down the neck of his shirt slightly, giving Steve a glimpse of the tattoo above his chest and Steve almost drops the spray bottle. He can’t decide if this was the best or the stupidest idea he ever had. 

Eddie opens his eyes and glares at Steve. Okay, the stupidest idea Steve ever had. 

“Oh, you’re dead, Harrington,” Eddie threatens, a mischievous smirk spreading over his face. “So dead.”

He moves towards Steve and Steve automatically steps back, his back hitting the counter. Quickly he raises the cleaning bottle, aiming the nozzle at Eddie as if it was a gun. 

“Don’t come any closer! I’m armed,” he says, finger on the trigger ready to spray Eddie again. Eddie does stop. For a second they stared at each other in anticipation. Steve knows that the water bottle isn’t going to stop Eddie at all. All of Steve’s muscles grow tense as Eddie’s smile grows wider. He looks like a tiger, ready to pounce on Steve any second. 

Before either of them can move though, the front door opens and someone steps into Family Video.  “The hell are you two doing?” Dustin’s voice comes from the front of the store. Saved by the bell, quite literally, Steve thinks as both he and Eddie turn around. 

“Working,” Eddie shrugs and Dustin, the little shit he is, just raises an eyebrow at the spray bottle Steve is still aiming at Eddie. Quickly, he lowers it. 

“What do you want, Henderson?” Steve sighs. He knows that Dustin’s VHS player is currently broken, so he sure isn’t here to rent out some tapes. So Dustin most likely wants a favor that requires Steve to play both babysitter and chauffeur. 

“We have a problem,” Dustin says gravely and Steve feels like an ice-cold hand is grabbing his neck and digging its freezing nails through Steve’s skin. Not again. Not now. Not so soon. 

“Both Lucas and Erica have the flu and can’t make it to the campaign on Wednesday,” Dustin elaborates and Steve is going to kill him. Strangle him, shoot him, drown him. 

“Lead with that next time instead of we have a problem , asshole” he grumbles but Dustin just rolls his eyes. That kid really needs his attitude checked. 

“You know I don’t postpone campaigns,” Eddie says seemingly disinterested, but he too looks a bit paler than before. “Just find a sub.” 

“Yeah, I know. I’m not here for you,” Dustin turns away from Eddie and stares very pointedly at Steve. 

Steve stares back just as pointedly waiting for Dustin to spit it out before he realizes what Dustin is about to ask. 

“No,” he shakes his head. “No way, man. I told you you can play your nerdy little game at my house but I’m not playing with you!” 

“Just this once Steve!” 

“Ask El or Max, I thought they were coming over too?” 

“They are but they don’t play.”

“And neither do I.” 

Eddie who until then has watched Dustin and Steve’s back and forth bemused suddenly leans very close to Steve. If he was one-inch closer he could hook his chin over Steve’s shoulder. His lips are so close to Steve’s ear that Steve can hear Eddie slowly exhale and inhale. He briefly wonders if Eddie on the other hand is aware that Steve has stopped breathing. 

“C’mon Harrington,” he says with a low voice that causes goosebumps to spread all over Steve’s skin. “Be the kids’ knight in shining armor. I’ll help you with your character.” 

“See, Eddie is going to help you with your character,” Dustin repeats the sentence as if it’s already a done deal. And it kind of is. Steve doesn’t really have a choice. Eddie’s body heat is radiating against his back and he can feel Eddie’s warm breath ghost over his neck. In this position, Eddie could just as well ask Steve to hand out his credit card information and social security number and Steve would do it. 

“Okay, fine,” he snaps and steps away from Eddie before he completely loses it. Dustin does his little happy jump and Eddie gives him a triumphant wink. Steve hates how easily they both have played him. “But only until the Sinclairs have recovered again.”

“Dungeon Master’s promise,” Eddie holds up his left hand and draws a cross over his heart with his right. “We’ll only keep you hostage as long as necessary.” 

Somehow Steve doubts that. 

“Awesome! See you Wednesday!” Dustin beams before running back out of the store, almost pushing tapes off a display table with his backpack. 

“Watch the tapes,” Steve calls after him but Dustin is already gone. With a very long, very exasperated sigh he leans against the counter. Eddie is looking at him so smug Steve now only wants to wipe that stupid grin off his face, no matter how pretty it makes Eddie look. 

“You’re a menace and I hate you,” he grumbles and gets a chuckle out of Eddie. 

“I’m a delight and you know it.” 

Steve sprays Eddie again with the cleaning bottle. 

This is how Steve finds himself at his, in paper-covered, dining room table on Wednesday afternoon, trying to follow Eddie’s instructions. 

“So this padawan that I’m playing—”

“Paladin,” Eddie corrects him. 

“That’s what I said,” Steve chooses to ignore Eddie’s sigh. “So he is this really strong fighter who is all about justice, right?” 

“Yup.” 

“But if I’m a paladin then why am I also a…,” Steve squints at the character sheet in front of him. As always the letters begin to swim, turning the entire page into a word search. Eddie’s messy handwriting doesn’t make reading any easier. “Half-elf?” 

“Half-elf is your race, paladin is your class,” Eddie explains patiently. “An orc could also be a paladin. Meanwhile, a half-elf could also be a bard or a warlock.” 

Steve nods, trying to follow Eddie. But then Eddie goes on about different levels, and oaths and devotions to gods and Steve is lost. Still, it’s cute watching Eddie get all excited about this character and go on and on about different pros and cons. He is just such a god damn nerd. 

For a moment Steve has a deja-vu to Nancy, sitting on her bed, forcing Steve to go through her flash card. Her hair was just about as long as Eddie’s is right now and without a quiet groan Steve realizes that he has a type. 

Before he can dwell on the thought the doorbell rings. To Steve’s surprise, it’s Joyce who drops off the kids and not Jonathan. Turns out Erica and Lucas aren’t the only ones who got the flu. 

“You could have called, I would have picked them up,” Steve says as the kids dash inside, undoubtedly pouncing on the sandwiches Steve has prepared for them. 

“Oh, don’t worry, sweetie,” Joyce smiles and rubs her hand over Steve’s shoulder. “You are already doing so much by letting them play here.” 

As always Steve melts a little when Joyce calls him sweetie . He doesn’t think his own mother has called him ever anything else but Steven, even though he’s preferred Steve since he was about five. 

“I can drop them off on my way home,” Eddie offers, suddenly standing behind Steve, making him jump slightly. 

“Oh, Eddie, good to see you,” Joyce instantly pulls him into a hug. Eddie looks startled for a second. He is still getting used to all the affection Joyce hands out to them like candy on Halloween. Steve can’t blame him. His chest still tightens every time Joyce hugs him. He knows it’s just simply the way Joyce is but every time her arms are around Steve it feels like she is trying to take all the hurt away from him. Joyce has been through so much and yet she keeps on giving and giving. Steve might have adopted the six children, but Joyce essentially adopted him along with them. And Nancy, and Robin and now Eddie. Eddie still looks slightly perplexed when she lets go of him. 

“Before I forget it, we are having a little get-together for July 4th,” she says. “Nothing crazy. We just think nobody should be alone on that day.” 

Steve has almost forgotten that July 4th is right around the corner. The thought alone fills his stomach with dread and his mind with memories that already haunt him every night. Joyce is right, he really doesn’t want to be alone on that day. 

“I’ll bring Robin if that’s alright?” He asks and Joyce gives him a soft smile. 

“Of course, sweetie. Robin is always welcome!” She turns to Eddie. “And so are you. Unless you have plans with your Uncle of course. He is invited too.” 

Steve never really told Eddie what happened at Starcourt Mall and judging by the slightly confused look Eddie is giving them, neither did Robin. 

“Wayne usually picks up an extra shift, because no one else wants to work,” Eddie says. “So I’ll…I’ll be there.” 

“Great,” Joyce beams before giving both Steve and Eddie one last hug. “Don’t worry I’ll pick up the kids later.” 

Before Steve or Eddie can protest Joyce has left. 

There is a loud noise coming from inside the house and Steve lets out a loud groan. 

“They are going to be the death of me, I swear.” 

Eddie gives him a sympathetic smile and steps aside so that Steve can walk through the door. 

“Time to face the music, Harrington,” he says and follows Steve back into the dining room. 

The boys have gathered around the dining table and are already in a heated debate about their characters. Max and El have made themselves comfortable on one of the couches, trying to share Max’s headphones and listening to her walkman. 

Eddie takes the seat at the top of the table where usually Steve’s dad sits and knowing how mad this would make his dad fills Steve with glee. He sits down next to Eddie, and Will, who is already studying Steve’s character sheet intensely. 

“He helped you make a good one,” he says quietly. 

“If you say so,” Steve shrugs before bending down and whispering, “I have no idea what I’m doing.” 

“Don’t worry I’ll help you,” Will whispers back and god, he really is such a sweet kid. Steve is glad he is back from California. “Also I love the name.”

“The name?” Confused, Steve stares at his page. “You named my character Buttercup?” He yells at Eddie who seems completely unfazed. The boys break out into giggles. 

“If you had spent less time daydreaming and more time focused on building your character you could have named him yourself,” Eddie shrugs. “But also Buttercup is a great name for a character. You love The Princess Bride .” 

Eddie does have a point there, Steve does absolutely love The Princess Bride . It’s one of those movies Robin would always give him a curious look after because Steve spent just as much time staring at Buttercup as he did at Westley or Inigo Montoya. 

“Fine,” he sighs. “Buttercup it is.” He very pointedly ignores the little red heart Eddie has doodled next to the name. Now is not the time and place to lose his mind over it. He can do this once the kids have left his house again. 

Steve knew that there were a lot of dice involved in the game, but he is unprepared just for all the math he has to do. Also, almost everything needs a freaking dice roll. Steve is really glad that Will is helping him out otherwise he would be so lost. 

Still, all the confusion and math talk is worth it for Eddie. He is so in his element, doing different voices for all his characters, gesturing wildly and making every expression possible with his face. He truly loves doing it and Steve loves watching him doing it. And every time Eddie turns to Steve and with a sardonic smile purrs Buttercup Steve feels like his heart is taking a sledgehammer to his rib cage, trying to jump out of his chest. 

“So Buttercup, ” Eddie grins. “You stand in front of two tunnels. Which one do you choose? Left or right?” 

“Ehhh...can I…see anything?” Steve asks cautiously. Next to him, Will gives him a little thumbs up, apparently, that was a good question. 

“I don't know, can you? Give me a perception check.” 

Will nudges the d20 towards Steve and he picks it up. “So whatever number you roll, plus your wisdom stat,” Will tells Steve. 

Steve looks at his sheet and grows a bit uneasy. His wisdom is +0, he knows he needs to roll something high. With his breath held he lets go of the dice. It rolls and rolls and rolls across the table, only to stop on one. 

“Ughhhhhh, nat one,” Mike groans and Steve lets out a sigh before turning his head to Eddie. 

Eddie’s grin is almost stretching from one ear to the other. 

“Both tunnels seem completely normal to you.” 

“Great, I take the left one then I guess,” Steve rolls his eyes and sinks further down into his chair. Eddie’s face is not even giving away in the slightest bit if it was the wrong or the right decision. 

“You walk into the tunnel, your footsteps echo over the stone floor. It’s dark, you can barely see. But from what you can see the tunnel seems empty,” Eddie narrates and Steve exhales relieved. “When suddenly—” Eddie adds and swiftly kicks his chair back, leaps over the table, grabs Steve, rips him out of his chair and dips him as if they were dancing. Steve lets out a startled yelp, completely taken by surprise. 

“A vampire jumps down from the ceiling and snatches you,” Eddie towers above him with a predatory grin. There are fake vampire fangs on top of his teeth, god knows when he had the time to put them on. Steve is painfully aware of how close he and Eddie are. One of Eddie's hands is under Steve’s back for support, the other one is gripping Steve’s hip tightly. He lowers his face closer to Steve’s. 

“Ohhhh you smell delicious,” he murmurs with a deep voice. “I’ve not had half-elf in forever. I will truly enjoy sucking you dry, my dear Buttercup. Drop, for drop, for drop.” 

With every drop, Eddie leans further down and Steve’s head starts swimming. One more drop and Eddie’s lips would be pressed against Steve’s throat and the thought makes Steve shiver slightly. Those soft lips in combination with those sharp fangs on his skin, Steve is not quite sure he would survive that, both in and out of character. 

Eddie lifts his head just ever so slightly so that his face is right above Steve’s. He has the audacity to let his tongue glide over his teeth and Steve needs to instantly know what they feel like. He would just have to shift his head ever so slightly and then he could press his lips against Eddie’s, let his own tongue drift over Eddie’s teeth. The sting if Eddie would bite his bottom lip and pull on it gently would probably make Steve pass out.

Eddie must have noticed Steve staring, because he opens his mouth just a tad more, showing off his teeth. Steve’s eyes flicker up to Eddie’s only to find Eddie’s eyes focused on his own lips. It would be so easy. Steve tilts his chin up. Eddie bends further down. 

“Should we roll for initiative now?” Dustin pipes up behind them. 

Despite Eddie’s secure hold on Steve, Eddie’s hands slip and Steve falls onto the floor. This time, Steve is actually going to kill Dustin. 

“Shit sorry,” Eddie curses and kneels down next to Steve. “You good?” 

“Fine,” Steve grumbles. He didn’t fall very far. From his position on the floor, he can see Max and El upside down, giving him an amused look. Steve sits up and once again finds him far too close to Eddie’s face. Quickly, both boys scramble to their feet. 

“Yes…eh…roll…roll for initiative,” Eddie sputters and sinks back into his seat. It only takes one second for him to get back into his role as DM. “Unless you want dear Buttercup here to become dinner.” 

Steve sits back down too. The other three boys grin at him widely. He hopes it’s because of his fall and not of the moment that occurred seconds before the fall. Unlikely though. From where they are sitting, they wouldn’t really have been able to see either Steve or Eddie’s face. And even if they had, Wheeler and Henderson would probably never even get the idea. Will might, but Steve also knows that if he did, Baby Byers would never say anything. 

They all grab their dice and roll. In the end, they just about manage to defeat the vampire and Buttercup survives with two hit points. 

“You drag yourselves out of the tunnel and end up in the woods. In front of you is a friendly tavern. A room is already booked for every single one of you by a mysterious benefactor. Tonight you get to rest,” Eddie says and the party sighs in relief. 

At that exact moment, the doorbell rings. Perfect timing. There is a lot of dawdling and pleading to stay longer and of course, it takes forever for everyone to grab their stuff. But eventually, Steve manages to hand the little menaces back to Joyce, who gives him one last tight hug before leaving. And then it’s just Steve standing alone in the front door of his house. 

Somewhere behind him, he can hear Eddie move around, probably collecting the last bits and pieces of his DnD stuff. The sound of someone else in the house is deeply comforting. But when Steve reaches the dining room Eddie is nowhere to be seen. There is more noise coming from the kitchen though. 

Eddie apparently doesn’t hear Steve enter, too busy humming a song Steve has never heard. He is standing at the sink, cleaning and stacking the dishes the kids had used. It’s nothing special and yet it’s so stupidly domestic it makes Steve’s heart clench. 

“You know we do have a dishwasher,” Steve says, making Eddie jump. 

“Jesus, fuck! I should tie a bell around your neck, Harrington,” Eddie curses and nope Steve is not going to think too hard about that. Just how he isn’t going to think about his DnD character having silk ropes in his equipment and Eddie’s little note next to it reading multi-purpose. 

“You didn’t have to do the dishes,” he says instead. Eddie dries his hands on a towel, makes sure it hangs neatly on his hook and leans against the kitchen counter. 

“Yeah, well consider it a thank you for letting us play here,” he shrugs. “And for your most torturous sacrifice of being the kids’ knight in shining armor.” 

“Well you put my character into the shining armor,” Steve points out and steps closer. “And I did not…completely hate playing.” 

“Hear, hear, mighty King Harrington didn’t hate playing DnD,” Eddie announces loudly. “What a most gracious compliment for me, your humble Dungeon Master.”  

If this was Robin, Steve would gently smack her on the arm and tell her to shut up. But this is Eddie, and Steve knows that if he touches Eddie right now he would feel like his entire body was on fire. Still, he takes another step closer. Woo him, he can hear Robin’s voice in the back of his head. 

“The vampire teeth were a nice touch,” he admits and shoves his hands in the back pockets of his jeans. He has no idea where to look or what to do with his hands. If Eddie was a girl he would step right up into his personal space, very pointedly look at his lips while saying that line about the vampire teeth and then kiss Eddie. But Eddie isn’t a girl and Steve is so, so, so out of his depth. 

“Eh they look cool, but are very impractical for actual neck biting,” Eddie says casually and Steve’s head snaps up. 

“Oh?” he asks, his mouth dry. He has no idea if Eddie is just fucking with him, doing his typical theatre kid thing, or if this is a come-on. Why does Eddie have to be so fucking difficult to read? 

“Yeah for that you wanna use your natural canines,” Eddie flashes his teeth demonstratively and then has the audacity to let his tongue glide over them again. “Far better for biting.” 

Steve swallows and he can feel Eddie’s eyes rest on his throat. The words prove it sit on the tip of Steve’s tongue, ready to spill over his lips. But before he can even open his mouth, Eddie suddenly looks away and clears his throat. 

“Well, I should probably—,” Eddie points his thumb behind him. 

Stay, Steve thinks. Don’t leave. Stay. 

“Do you wanna watch a movie?” Steve blurts out before Eddie can say get going. He just stares at Steve, startled by the sudden outburst. 

Please stay. 

“I have leftover takeout and beer in the fridge?” he tries to sweeten the offer. The surprised look on Eddie’s face is replaced by something softer, that always makes Steve dizzy. A private little smile, that feels like it’s just reserved for Steve and for Steve alone. 

“Alright,” Eddie says quietly. “Even though your couch really is uncomfortable as fuck.” 

“Shut up,” Steve rolls his eyes and opens the fridge to get the beers and the takeout out. “Just go put on a movie.”

Snickering, Eddie leaves the kitchen while Steve heats up the food. He decides to grab several cans of beer and balances two plates with lukewarm noodles on his hands into the living room.

Eddie is still standing in front of their huge display of tapes, that could almost measure up against Family Video. His parents are never home to watch any and yet they of course need to have every newest movie out there on tape. 

“Made a choice yet?” Steve asks and puts down the plates and cans. 

“Hmm, not yet,” Eddie hums and continues studying Steve’s shelf. “Do you have Clue?”

“Top shelf, very far to the left,” Steve replies and walks back towards the kitchen to get some cutlery. Out of the corner of his eyes, he sees Eddie going onto his tiptoes to reach the top shelf. His shirt rides up slightly, revealing his in scars and ink covered hip bones. Steve misses the kitchen door by an inch and walks into the wall. 

The pain is dull and almost feels like a punch to the face. Even though he has taken far worse, it still hurts like a bitch.

“Fuck,” Steve curses and presses his hand against his forehead. This is going to leave a bruise.

“Jesus Christ Harrington,” Eddie shakes his head behind him. “You really are aiming for that concussion tonight.” 

“You dropped me in the first place!” 

“Well the good news is there is nothing precious in there that can be broken,” Eddie teases and twists whatever tape he has chosen in his hands. 

Steve just flips him off and marches to the freezer to get some ice out while Eddie goes to put on the movie. 

“How’s your head?” Eddie asks, already sprawled over the couch when Steve comes back to the living room. 

“Hadn’t had any complaints yet,” he says automatically and it’s Eddie’s turn to choke on his beer. Oh, what sweet, sweet justice. 

“Didn’t peck you for an Elvira fan,” Eddie coughs. 

“She’s alright,” Steve sinks deeper into the couch. Eddie is right, it really is uncomfortable. “But Robin and I just constantly kept quoting that bit back and forth. Now it’s stuck in my brain.” 

He turns to the TV to see what movie Eddie has picked and lets out a groan. 

“Dude, you gotta be kidding me? Fucking The Princess Bride?” 

Eddie snickers. “You said it yourself, you love this movie, Buttercup!” 

Steve throws a pillow at Eddie, which he dodges gracefully and with laughter. Steve just rolls his eyes and presses play. He knows he should use this opportunity to shift closer to Eddie, maybe subtly drop his arm around him again. But Steve is far too on edge already right now. So he just focuses on his food and the movie. 

“You know I think it’s quite surprising that Buttercup didn’t fall for Inigo,” Steve says once they’ve reached the dueling scene between Westley and Inigo. 

“Because Westley is her one true love?” Eddie looks at him like he’s lost it. 

“Yes, yes I know. But she also thought he was dead,” Steve argues. “And Inigo was right there with his rugged bandit charms, his fencing skills, the brown curls and doe eyes and—” and Steve really should stop talking about right fucking now. 

“No way, man,” Eddie shakes his head, apparently not reading into anything Steve just said. “All that rugged bandit charm would go poof with one single as you wish from Westley.” 

“Please, as you wish has nothing against Inigo,” Steve takes another sip of his beer. Eddie still gawks at him in disbelief. 

“You are telling me, you would not instantly swoon if someone said as you wish to you? Really Harrington?” 

“Nope, no chance,” Steve says and finishes his beer. “Can you pass me another one?” 

Eddie grabs one of the cans standing on the table next to his side of the couch. He turns back to Steve and just as Steve’s fingers close around the can Eddie bats his eyelashes, pins Steve down with his beautiful brown eyes and whispers, “As you wish.” 

Steve, to his credit, does not drop the can. It is good that he is sitting though because he is sure that if he was standing his legs would have buckled so severely he would have fallen onto the floor. Instead, he uses his last bit of willpower, stares Eddie directly into the eyes and lies, “See, nothing?”

“Really? Nothing?”

Eddie can clearly see that Steve is struggling. They once again are so god damn close. Eddie’s fingers are still brushing against Steve’s on the can. 

“Nope,” Steve licks his lips and just as expected Eddie’s eyes flicker down. “Nothing.”

Both of them lean in closer. Their knees bump against each other. 

“Shame,” Eddie whispers and Steve closes his eyes. 

For some reason the universe really, fucking, truly hates Steve. There is a loud bang coming from the TV, making both of them jump so much that half of the beer lands on Eddie. 

“Ugh,” he groans while Steve wonders how the fuck this keeps happening. “Fantastic, this soaked right through my shirt,” Eddie adds, with a disgusted face. 

“I could lend you some clothes?” Steve offers and before Eddie can say anything, he rushes upstairs. He grabs a simple, dark blue t-shirt (one of the few non-polo shirts he owns) and a pair of gray sweatpants. Eddie might not have gotten any beer on his jeans, but at this point, Steve might as well offer them, as well as his guest bedroom. 

“Here,” he says and hands them to Eddie while not trying to stare at Eddie’s wet shirt clinging to his chest. “Guest bathroom is the second door on the right.” 

“Of course, you have a guest bathroom,” Eddie mumbles and shakes his head as he gets up. 

“We also have a guest bedroom? If…if you wanna stay the night?” 

Smooth Harrington, very smooth . Steve can already see Robin dying of laughter when he tells her. 

Eddie stops halfway through the door and gives Steve an amused look. 

“Are you propositioning me again, Stevie?” 

Yes.  

“Just thought it’s late,” Steve tries to say as casually as possible. Eddie stares at him with an unreadable expression as always. 

“Yeah, not having to drive sounds nice,” he says and with that vanishes into the guest bathroom. 

When he reemerges, Steve realizes he has made a horrible mistake. Seeing Eddie in his clothes is…a lot. The shirt is hanging loose enough to once again reveal bits of Eddie’s chest tattoo and Steve tries his best not to stare. He’s put his hair up in a loose bun and he looks so good Steve has no idea how to cope. 

“Ready to get going?” He quickly asks and forces himself to look at the TV. “Because I don’t trust this Prince Humperdinck one bit.” 

Eddie sits back down on his side of the couch. There is far too much space between them now. Steve can’t decide if he is relieved or absolutely hates it. 

“More like Prince Humper- dick,” Eddie snorts and pulls his legs up to his chest. They remain relatively quiet for the rest of the movie. They don’t really talk much either once the movie is done and they walk upstairs. But it’s not uncomfortable silence at least. Cautious silence maybe. 

“Guest bedroom is here,” Steve lamely points at the door. “And I’m the last room down the hall. If you need me.”  

“Sure,” Eddie says and then they both just awkwardly stand there for a moment. Eddie chews on his lip like he is about to add something, but when he opens his mouth all he says is, “Night Harrington.” 

“Night Munson,” Steve gives him a little nod and then essentially flees into his own room. 

With a groan, Steve falls into bed. He doesn’t bother changing and just kicks off his jeans and gets out of his shirt. Whatever this weird tension between him and Eddie is, he has to do something about it. There are only so many moments and almost kisses Steve can deal with. Next time he really should just go for it. Swallow the anxiety, damn the consequences and kiss Eddie. Best case scenario Eddie kisses back. Worst case scenario Steve has managed to read all the signals very wrong and loses one of the best friends he’s probably ever had other than Robin. 

He really wishes he could call Robin right now, but it is close to 1 am already, so it will have to wait until tomorrow. Steve lets out a sigh and closes his eyes. 

He’s had enough alcohol to fall asleep pretty instantly, but as always Steve’s sleep is far from restful. Tonight it’s Vecna again, making the kids float around Steve, their bones slowly breaking, blood gushing from their eyes. He can’t save them all. He tries to reach Vecna and trips over a dead body. Robin’s broken corpse lies on the ground. Steve screams. 

“Steve! Steve!” Someone is shaking Steve quite violently. “Wake up!” 

Steve’s eyes fly open in a panic, he half expects Vecna to still be looming above him. But all there is, is the warmth of Eddie’s big, brown eyes, looking down at Steve concerned. Steve is panting so heavily, it takes him a moment to realize that one of Eddie’s hands is resting gently on his chest. 

“It’s alright, Steve,” Eddie says softly. “Just a nightmare.” 

Steve nods, still unable to calm his breathing or to say anything. His entire body is shivering. He tries to ground himself. Robin taught him this one technique and it barely helps, but right now he would do anything to stop shaking. 

Five things he can see: One, the worry on Eddie’s face. His eyes are wide, his brows furrowed and his lips twisted together tightly. Steve wishes he had the mental cohesiveness to sit up and kiss the worry away. But his mind is still spinning. Two, Eddie’s dark curls falling loosely over his shoulders. The bun must have come apart while he slept. Three, the light coming through his door from the hallway, giving Eddie a small halo. Four, the red pick Eddie wears around his neck, dangling in the air between them. Five, the in blood-covered denim vest hanging on the front door of his closet. He really needs to give it back to Eddie at some point. But not right now. 

Steve’s breath becomes more steady, so he continues. 

Four things he can feel: One, Eddie’s hand gently cupping his jaw. Two, Eddie’s thumb gingerly brushing over Steve’s cheek. Apparently, Eddie takes his rings off when he goes to bed. It’s just his callus fingers on Steve’s burning skin, no traces of cold metal to be felt. Three, the heat of Eddie’s knee pressing into Steve’s thigh. Four, the tickle of Eddie’s curls on Steve’s collar bones. 

Vecna is dead. They made sure of that. He isn’t going to come back. They are all safe. 

Three things he can hear: One, his own breath slowly calming down. Two, the creaking of his bed springs when Eddie leans closer. Three, Eddie very softly promising, “I’ve got you, Steve. It’s alright.” 

Two things he can smell: One, laundry detergent. Two, it’s incredible how in the middle of the night and while wearing Steve’s clothes, Eddie still manages to smell like freshly brewed coffee and used leather. And a very faint hint of roses? Maybe it’s his shampoo. 

Steve finally stops shivering. Despite the heat, goosebumps spread all over his body again. The concerned look on Eddie’s face becomes softer, but he still continues to caress Steve’s cheek. 

One thing he can taste: He knows what he would like to taste. But the only thing in his mouth is the aftertaste of stale beer. He should really have remembered to brush his teeth. With that, the panic has finally subsided. 

“Thanks,” he eventually manages to rasp. “Sorry for waking you.” Eddie gives him a sad, little smile. 

“No worries,” his voice is still incredibly tender. “Might as well have been me screaming my lungs out in my sleep tonight.” 

He sits up straighter and takes his hand off Steve’s face and Steve feels like Eddie might as well have cut off one of his limbs. Automatically, he reaches out and grabs Eddie’s wrist. 

“Could…could you stay?” Steve hates asking. He presses his face into the mattress to hide his embarrassment and to avoid looking at Eddie. “Not being alone helps.” 

He hears the rustling of fabric and then the mattress dips next to him. An arm wraps around his shoulder, pulling him against Eddie’s chest. Eddie’s thumb gently rubs over Steve’s shoulder and for the first time in a long time, Steve feels truly safe. 

Usually, this arrangement would have Steve shaking, painfully aware of every little point where his body is touching Eddie’s. He would overthink every single exhale and inhale, his brain steaming with what to say and what to do. But it’s been a long day and exhaustion and sleep deprivation drag Steve back into unconsciousness. 

He is gone so quickly again, he almost doesn’t hear Eddie whisper, “As you wish.” 

Notes:

Huge thanks to Marie, for helping me with the DnD section and making sure I am not making a total fool out of myself. They also made this incredible character sheet for Buttercup, I urge you to zoom in on the red little notes Eddie has written on it.

There now is incredible
art of the DnD almost kiss drawn by my friend Mossy, you should go check it out on tumblr!!!!
As always if you enjoyed this chapter feel free to leave comments/kudos <3

Chapter 5: I just want your extra time

Eddie has had his fair share of near-death experiences. He remembers them all more or less vividly. All the moments he has died a little inside have blurred together. The piercing humiliation and hurt he now can hide so well every time someone calls him a freak. The burning shame and hot anger mixed together into a blazing Molotov cocktail in the pit of his stomach when he was told that he would not be able to graduate summer of ‘84. And summer of ‘85. The acidic taste of panic when he realized he liked boys and the cold self-loathing he choked on for years because of it. These feelings have been so constant in Eddie’s life, so frequent that he doesn’t even feel little parts of him dying because of them anymore. Almost like skin cells decaying, completely unnoticed unless he stares too long into the mirror and sees all the cracks he is covered in. Like a chipped mug at a yard sale no one wants. 

But the times death has been more severe, Eddie can’t forget no matter how much he tries. The day his mother dropped him off at Wayne’s trailer. She had spent the afternoon teaching him how to play American Pie on the guitar, let him stay up to watch MASH and then brought him to bed and sat there until Eddie had fallen asleep. When he woke up later that night, hearing her and Wanye argue, followed by the engine of her car, he knew she wouldn’t come back. Running away from things apparently runs in the family. 

There was the time he got called into the principal's office, but instead of detention, he was given the news that Wayne had gotten into an accident at work and was in the hospital. He had prayed, pleaded, begged with any kind of higher power that might be out there to keep Wayne alive. And with every single word he had uttered under his breath a little bit of life had drained out of him. For a long time, this had been the scariest day of Eddie’s life. 

Until the night Vecna took Chrissy. He knows that it wasn’t his fault, that there was nothing he could have done. At least that’s what the kids tell him, and Robin and Steve and it’s what Eddie tries to tell himself. But in quiet moments he knows that if he had played Chrissy’s favorite song. Or if he had just taken the time to check if she was alright instead of giddily selling her Special K, thinking about all the records he would buy with the money. If he hadn’t run. Maybe then she would still be alive. There is more guilt and regret flowing through his veins than there is blood. 

And the little bit of blood he had left, had ended up on the in tendrils and bat corpses covered ground of the upside down. The one time, Eddie had truly thought he would die. He had been so cold. The only heat coming from the blood spilling over the corners of his mouth mixing on his skin with Dustin’s hot tears. And then Steve’s hands had been on him, his palms burning against Eddie’s chest. 

“I know it’s probably quite hard for you Munson, but I told you not to be cute,” Steve had growled and pressed a torn-up shirt against the gaping wounds in Eddie’s torso. “Nancy, take Dustin! Robin, I need you to put pressure on this.” 

Eddie still doesn’t know if it had been wishful thinking or a gracious hallucination on the brink of death, but getting called cute by Steve Harrington were nice last words to hear before dying. His vision had started to become blurry. 

“Hey, no, no, no, Eddie.” Two fingers were pressed against his neck while a hand gently cradled his face. “You’re not dying, do you hear me? Don’t you fucking dare! You’re not dying!” 

And then Steve’s hands had pressed down on his heart, held down the flaccid muscle and released it with a sob.  A second later, the pressure returned alongside Steve’s voice, half rasping half miserably singing, “Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive.” 

A horrible tune to die to. He tried to tell Steve as much, but most of the words coming out of Eddie’s mouth were garbled, stained sanguine and tasted like iron and ash. Still, Steve had heard him and let out a bitter snort that was closer to a sniff than to laughter. 

“Well, good thing you’re not going to die!” 

Steve’s face had been covered in pearls of sweat, blooming bruises, and grim determination. Like an angel of death, he had been looming above Eddie, only that he was trying to keep the life inside of Eddie’s body instead of gently taking it out of Eddie’s hands. It was obvious then, that if death wanted to have Eddie Munson, he would have to fist fight Steve Harrington first. And if Vecna was anything to go by, Eddie would happily place his money on Steve, no matter how much he wanted to close his eyes. Instead, he found Steve’s. He was beautiful, ragged and looking down at Eddie like he was something precious, something of value, something worth keeping alive. 

Fuck, why was the thought of Steve Harrington keeping his heart beating scarier than death?  If Eddie had been able to, he would have run. 

He does not really recall how they got him out of the upside down and into a hospital. But he will forever remember Steve’s fingers pressed against his pulse and the piercing gaze of his hazel eyes, stubbornly trying to stare Eddie’s life into staying inside of his chest. And somehow it had worked. Or at least Eddie had thought so until this morning. 

Maybe, he had died back then. Because saving the world apparently had been a good enough deed to get Eddie into the heavenly afterlife that is waking up with Steve Harrington in his arms. They are lying chest to chest, barely enough space for a hand to fit between them. Steve is loosely gripping Eddie’s shirt, or more accurately Steve’s shirt that Eddie has slept in, while Eddie’s arm is splayed over Steve’s naked hip. Both their heads are resting on the same pillow and if Eddie just shifted his face slightly he could nuzzle Steve’s nose with his own. 

He should leave right now. Try to untangle them, before Steve wakes up. But Eddie can’t bring himself to move. Instead, he allows himself to indulge for a moment. Steve’s hair is flat and a mess and flopping into his face. It’s a delightful sight. And a dangerous one. Eddie knows he shouldn’t, he really shouldn’t, but Eddie is a weak man and Steve is right there. Slowly, he reaches out and gingerly brushes a strand of hair out of Steve’s face. His hand lingers for a moment in Steve’s hair and Steve lets out a low hum. Quickly, Eddie pulls his hand away. 

It’s not that Eddie is worried that Steve will be mad if they wake up like this. By now Steve is invading Eddie’s personal space more frequently than Eddie is invading his. Plus, there are only so many times you can end up almost kissing someone, before realizing they most likely want to kiss you too. And isn’t that a world view shifting, impossible-seeming, downright preposterous thought? Steve Harrington wants to kiss him. 

It is as wonderful as it is life-ruining. Because Eddie wants to kiss Steve too. So fucking badly. But he can’t. He can’t be Steve’s queer experiment. 

A year ago he would have been ecstatic to satisfy Steve Harrington’s curiosity-driven lips. Make the King of Hawkins High meet him in dark corners and dodgy bars, getting him to ask nicely if guys taste the same as girls. Have his wicked way with Harrington, and be a dirty, little secret that burns on his mind. Eddie might have been the school’s freak, but King Steve would have come to him and oh, Eddie would have loved to get drunk on that power. 

But Steve Harrington is no longer a douchebag jock with a pretty face who Eddie could have left behind without the smallest hesitation, absolutely not giving a shit if he ever would get to kiss Steve again. King Steve is just Steve now. He is soft and kind and just a little bit broken underneath it all. Eddie traces the scar on Steve’s hip, its twin twinging on his own abdomen.  

Their friendship would probably survive a couple of hungry kisses and wandering hands, but Eddie’s heart would not. If they kissed, Steve would at some point realize that it’s not for him, tell Eddie thanks, and go back to normal. Eddie on the other hand knows he would not be able to recover. 

Good for Steve though on being curious. Eddie hopes he has fun and finds someone else who is safe to experiment with. Only that the idea of Steve kissing anyone else is just as unbearable as the idea of Steve kissing him and not meaning it.  It’s a horrible predicament, the catch-22 of heartbreak and part of Eddie knows he should have stayed away from Steve, listened to his instincts and run. 

But he didn’t. Instead, he just had to be cocky, and reckless and had let himself slowly be drawn to Steve like Icarus to the sun. Why are the prettiest things always the most fatal, Eddie wonders as dawn starts to creep over the walls, colouring Steve’s bedroom in bright, warm hues. Steve’s face is dipped in golden light, his hair glowing copper and he suddenly looks younger somehow. Peaceful. Like the weight of violently thrown punches and years of trauma doesn't sit heavy on top of his eyelids. The sunshine flickers over the bridge of Steve’s nose, kisses every bit of skin it can reach and swirls around every freckle it has already left. Eddie would love to trace them with his thumb, his lips, grab an eyeliner and connect them into tiny constellations. 

Steve blinks awake, his sleep-filled eyes find Eddie and a slow smile spreads on his lips. Oh, what a lovely way to burn. Steve’s hand in his shirt tightens ever so slightly. Eddie realizes he has not stopped caressing Steve’s hip yet. He doesn’t. 

“Morning,” Steve rasps and Eddie plummets to his death. They are going to kiss. 

“Morning,” he whispers back. There is an ever-so-gentle tug in Eddie’s chest and he can’t tell if it’s Steve or the fluttering panic of his own heart. Probably both. 

They are going to kiss. Basked in the soft morning glow, nestled into Steve’s bed, bodies pressed together so closely, Eddie no longer knows which is his and which is Steve’s, they are going to kiss. It’s going to ruin Eddie. It doesn’t matter anymore. Eddie is going to let himself be ruined, have his body and soul shattered hitting the waves and let the remains be washed to the Cretan shores. Steve is beautiful. They are going to kiss. 

The doorbell rings, loudly, followed by someone pounding their fists against the front door, breaking their moment like glass. With a groan, Steve rolls onto his back. His hand is still in Eddie’s shirt, he could very easily pull Eddie on top of him. But he doesn’t. The doorbell keeps on assaulting their ears. 

“One of the little gremlins?” Eddie asks, but Steve shakes his head. 

“It’s Robin, she always rings the bell like that.”

“Of course, she does,” Eddie grumbles and Steve lets go of his shirt. Eddie tells himself that he doesn’t mourn the loss. 

“Can you go let her in? She’ll never let me live it down if I open the front door in nothing but my boxers,” Steve sighs and turns his head so he is looking directly at Eddie.

Eddie really does not want to move. And he really does not want Steve to put on some actual clothes. He could spend an eternity like this, lying in bed with Steve, half-naked, legs entangled and faces only inches apart, looking at Steve and being looked at by Steve in return. But Robin keeps ringing the bell and banging her fists against the front door and knowing her she probably isn’t going to stop until someone opens the door. 

“Sure,” Eddie says and reluctantly leaves the warmth of Steve’s bed. As he stands up his head starts swimming suddenly and everything goes dark for a second. Instinctively, he reaches out for the wall to steady himself. As quickly as the dizziness has come, it is gone again. 

“You good?” Steve asks, concerned, standing halfway between his bed and his closet. 

“Just dizzy,” Eddie says and holds on a moment longer to the wall, in case he gets light-headed again. Steve shoots him a sympathetic smile. Eddie knows that ever since his first encounter with the upside down, Steve gets pretty bad migraines. It’s the reason he sometimes wears sunglasses inside, no matter how much they make him look like a douche. 

Eddie waits one more second before he lets go of the wall and moves downstairs. Robin has still not stopped ringing the doorbell. 

“Buckley, it’s eight fucking am,” he greets her at the door and Robin scrambles two steps back in surprise before her eyes grow large. 

“That’s Steve’s shirt,” she points out flatly, frowning at Eddie, not even bothering with a hello. He looks down at his chest as if he isn’t painfully aware that he is wearing Steve’s shirt and simply shrugs. 

“It’s also Steve’s house. Which you are trying to get into at once again eight fucking am!” 

Robin keeps staring as if Eddie’s torso was completely cut open showing off his organs, instead of him simply wearing Steve’s shirt. It is a very nice shirt, and Eddie does not plan on returning it any time soon. But it still is no reason for Robin to stare like that. Then Eddie realizes how this looks and feels himself smirk. Because he too, is at Steve’s house at eight fucking am, hair sleep tousled, and dressed in Steve’s clothes. 

“Oh my god, did you two?” Robin hisses and waves her finger at Eddie in a motion that apparently is meant to symbolize hooking up. 

“No,” he says, smirk growing wider and wider. If Robin has to disturb his morning like this, he gets to fuck with her a little bit at least. “But we would have if you hadn’t barged in here at—” 

“At eight fucking am, yes I know,” she interrupts him. “So he finally told you how he feels?” 

The smile falls off Eddie’s face. 

What? 

“Are you two gonna come in at some point?” Steve shouts from the kitchen. “I’m making coffee.” 

What? 

“I brought donuts,” Robin shouts back and pushes past Eddie into the house, a brown, greasy paper bag in her hands. 

Fucking what? 

Eddie still stands at the door for a moment, dumbstruck, before turning around and dashing after Robin. He tries to reach her before she enters the kitchen, take her arm, pull her away and demand what the fuck she meant with so he finally told you how he feels. 

But by the time he gets to her she is already halfway in the kitchen. 

“You’re up early,” Steve greets her as she throws the bag full of donuts on the kitchen island. Behind them, the coffee bubbles in the coffee maker, Steve’s kitchen for once smells like a home and not like a museum. 

“Yeah, it’s eight fucking am, I’ve been told,” she leans over the kitchen island and ruffles Steve’s flat hair. He bats her hand away and hands her a cup of coffee. 

Unwarranted jealousy stirs in Eddie’s chest and leaves a sour taste on his tongue. It’s absolutely stupid to be jealous of how close and domestic they are. They are Steve and Robin after all. Robin and Steve. Two halves of the disaster duo, best friends, and the closest thing this world probably will ever get to soulmates. And it’s not like he wants to measure up, he knows he could never. 

But he wants this. Slow mornings in Steve’s kitchen, hands in Steve’s hair and laughter on Steve’s lips. Fingers brushing, closed around a shared cup of coffee and shoulders bumping, no concept of personal space. Grains of sleep clinging to Steve’s lashes and stolen kisses that not even morning breath can keep them from having. Tired yawns and powdered sugar, hoarse voices and bacon frying. Cold hands on warm stomachs and faces pressed between shoulder blades. Fingers tracing over scars and lips kissing over bites. He wants lazy morning sex in Steve’s bed and to wash Steve’s hair in the shower afterwards. Shared clothes and mismatched socks. Burned toast and crinkly newspapers, Wham songs and fondly rolled eyes. Bread crumbs in butter and I love yous in the air. He wants, he wants, he wants. 

A warm cup of coffee is pressed into his hands and suddenly Steve’s smile is a lot closer than it was a moment ago. 

“Two sugars, no milk,” he says softly as Eddie rests the rim of the mug against his bottom lip and inhales the steam. He takes a sip. It’s absolutely average coffee, but it’s coffee just how Eddie likes it. He knows he never told Steve how he takes his coffee. 

So he finally told you how he feels?

Maybe he can have this? 

Steve turns back to Robin, grabs a donut and dunks it in his own coffee. “So what’s wrong, Buckley?” he asks and takes a bite. Robin tenses instantly. 

“I kinda screwed up,” she says, uncharacteristically quiet. “Vickie kept talking about going to Lovers Lake and how it was the perfect weather for swimming and I panicked because obviously I don’t want to go to Lovers Lake but I couldn’t tell her why and so I said that you are having a pool party.” 

Steve looks up very slowly from his coffee. His lips are pressed into a thin line and his shoulders slump. There is no anger or disappointment on his face. He just looks tired again, battered, exhausted. 

Eddie has still no idea what’s wrong with Steve’s pool, but he wants to drain it with all the bad memories inside and pour cement in it until the ghosts of Steve’s past are buried under heavy concrete. 

“I’m sorry, I panicked,” Robin looks like she is on the verge of panic again. “I can tell her you got sick. Or…or that your pool is getting cleaned. Maybe we can go swimming somewhere else. I just really don’t wanna go back to Lovers Lake and—”

“Did you tell her who else is going to be there?” Steve interrupts her. 

“What?” 

“Adult pool party or did you tell her the kids will be there too?” 

“A–adult?” she stutters. “Steve, you don’t have to—”

“It’s fine,” he waves her off, even though it’s obvious that it is not fine. “Can’t hide from the pool forever.”

All three of them are quiet for a moment. Eddie’s instinct is to crack a joke to break up the tension, but he presses his teeth together and keeps his jaw shut. He can tell that the subject is too touchy for a stupid joke and all he really wants is to pull Steve into his arms and hold him for a while. He bites the inside of his cheek instead. 

“And I’d rather everyone go swimming here than Lovers Lake,” Steve adds and musters a smile. Surprisingly enough, it does reach his eyes as he turns to Eddie. “So Munson, you got swimming trunks or do I need to lend you some?” 

“You know, Harrington, if you wanted to see me without a shirt you could have just asked,” Eddie teases and to his delight, Steve’s own smile grows. “No need to throw a pool party.” 

“Yeah, but this way I get you shirtless and wet and dripping.”

“You gonna offer to rub sun lotion on me too?” 

“Oh my god,” Robin groans next to them and right, ye s, she is also still in the kitchen. Eddie’s cheeks burn and Steve’s face looks equally as red. 

“I thought we could also invite Nancy and Jonathan?” Robin suggests to both Eddie’s and Steve’s surprise. It’s been so much of just Steve, Robin, and Vickie lately, that Eddie had almost forgotten that Nancy and Jonathan are also part of their little friendship group. Mainly, because some things are best kept only to the people involved. People who won't bat an eye at two girls kissing. 

“Do they know?” Steve asks the question that has been burning on Eddie’s tongue. Steve’s hands twist the chord of his sweatpants tightly. When Eddie gets nervous, he becomes bouncy, jumpy, buzzing with energy that needs to be released. Steve, he has realized, becomes stoic, stiff, unmoving. Fight vs. flight. It’s almost funny how different they are, Eddie thinks. Though right now he doesn’t want to run. He just wants to take Steve’s hands, intertwine their fingers and let his thumb soothingly rub over the back of Steve’s hand. Eddie tightens his grip around the cup of coffee.

“I told Nancy a couple of days ago,” Robin admits. “She kinda knew already. Ever since the graduation party.” 

“And she was alright with it?” 

“Yeah, she was. Be a bit hypocritical if she or Jonathan weren’t, you know with the whole Will stuff?” 

So Eddie’s not been the only one to have a feeling about Baby Byers. From what he can tell Jonathan absolutely loves his little brother and supports him no matter what. Still, maybe Eddie should start dropping some hints around Will that he isn’t the only one who likes boys. At that age, Eddie sure could have used an older queer person to help him make sense of it all. Maybe he and Robin can be that person for Will. 

Next to him, Steve exhales slowly. He has let go of the chords of his sweats, a red imprint wrapping around his fingers. Maybe he was just nervous about Nancy’s reaction for Robin’s sake, but Eddie feels like there is more to it. Part of him wants to take this entire morning and dissect it under a microscope, turn over every sentence said in his head twice until he can taste every individual word on his tongue. Scrutinize every little breath, every gesture, every touch, pin them on a wall and connect them with the red string of Steve’s polo shirt. But right now is not the time or place to overthink every fiber of Steve’s being. Not with Steve visibly shaken for a myriad of reasons that Eddie would love to know, but he isn’t going to pry. Maybe one day Steve will tell him, but until then Eddie is going to be what Steve needs in a situation like this: a friend. 

“You have to ask her if she is comfortable with the pool,” Steve says slowly. 

Apparently, Wheeler too is somehow involved in the reason Steve hates his pool so much. 

“Of course,” Robin nods. “And if she doesn’t want to come it can be just us four.” 

“Sure,” Steve picks up his mug again and takes a sip. “Pool party this afternoon then.” 

“Great, I’ll call Nancy,” Robin says and walks out of the kitchen towards Steve’s phone, leaving Eddie and Steve behind. Steve is very focused on the marble pattern of the kitchen island. 

“Are you really okay?” Eddie asks cautiously and steps closer. He can tell that Steve is about to lie again, so Eddie puts his hand right next to Steve’s. They’re not touching but they are close. “Steve,” he adds softly and Steve finally looks him in the eyes. 

He always takes on more than he should, worries more than he should. Pretends to be fine, not to keep up some pristine image of the knight in shining armor, but because he thinks that taking care of everybody is his job. Eddie’s hand shifts closer until their pinkies are lying right next to each other, skin gently pressed against skin.

If they were still kids Eddie would hook his finger around Steve’s, grin, showing off the gaps in his teeth and whisper, “You can tell me, I won’t snitch, pinky promise.” 

But they are so far removed from childhood and innocence. Hell, not even the kids get to be kids, and Steve is like a candle burning on both ends, shouldering the kids’ trauma while having the last years of his own adolescence ripped away. Other people their age get drunk, worry about college admission dates and get to make mistakes they’ll laugh about in ten years. If Steve makes a mistake there won’t be anything to laugh about. So all he gets is to not be okay. And Eddie is trying to tell him that it’s alright, that Steve doesn’t have to keep up the pretense all the time. Somehow, the gentle touch of pinkies gets the message across. 

“No,” Steve shakes his head slightly. “But I know I’d be worse if they actually went to Lovers Lake. At least there is no badly closed up hell gate at the bottom of my pool.” 

Eddie nods, understanding. Even though he has a new trailer thanks to the government’s hush money, he does live in a constant fear that the ceiling will open up again with demobats and demogorgons tumbling out of it. The idea of Vickie and Robin swimming at Lovers Lake makes him just as anxious. 

They finish their coffees in silence, the occasional noise from Robin on the phone carries through the door. From what it sounds like Nancy is willing to come over for the pool party. 

For some reason that makes Steve look more miserable, and Eddie decides he needs to distract Steve somehow. He puts his mug loudly down on the kitchen island and clears his throat. 

“I think I need to borrow another shirt,” he tells Steve. 

A range of emotions flickers over Steve’s face before he tries to sculpt his expression into something neutral and fails utterly. 

“Sure man, striped polo or Tears for Fears shirt?” 

“I hate you.”  

The smile on Steve’s face when he hands Eddie his Tears for Fears shirt is worth it though. 

“Ruining my cool and mysterious reputation, Harrington,” Eddie sighs as he holds up the shirt and shudders at the logo. 

“Oh please, you’ve never looked as cool as you do now,” Steve grins and leaves the room to give Eddie privacy to change. Because of course, Steve has to be so fucking decent. 

With a groan, Eddie puts on the Tears for Fears shirt. It smells like the laundry detergent Steve uses and therefore it smells delightfully like Steve. Eddie has to forcefully keep himself from pressing the fabric against his face and inhaling. He might be gone but not that far gone. 

If he doesn’t throw Steve’s other shirt into the hamper but pockets it secretly instead, then that’s nobody's business. It’s only fair, Steve after all still has his vest. 

Steve lets his eyes linger on Eddie when he comes back down into the kitchen, a very satisfied smile on his lips. Eddie can’t blame him, he probably would look a lot more smitten at Steve if Steve was wearing one of his Metallica shirts. 

“I’ll go grab my swimming stuff,” he says, trying to ignore the dangerous glint in Steve’s eyes and remembering where he’s left his trunks instead. “I’ll see you later.” 

“Don’t be late.” 

Automatically Eddie responds with, “A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to.” 

Steve stares at him as if Eddie had said the quote in Elvish. 

“Right, you've never read Lord of the Rings,” Eddie shakes his head. “Thank god you’re pretty, Harrington.” 

The crumbled-up paper bag flies against his head. 

“Thank god you’re pretty, you nerd.” 

“You think I’m pretty, Stevie?” Eddie leans against the kitchen door and bats his long lashes at Steve, imitating the giggling girls in the schoolyard every time Steve would walk by. He had never understood the obsession. Sure, Steve had always been easy on the eyes, but there had been no way Steve Harrington was that good a flirt and that smooth a gentleman that all the girls in school were swooning if he even just as much as looked at them. 

Finding himself at the receiving end of Steve’s look, Eddie, almost to his dismay, realizes that the rumors are true. He’s never felt quite so raw than when Steve looks at him like this. He wonders what else people might not have exaggerated about Steve. 

“Pretty annoying,” Steve rolls his eyes and the little spell between them is broken. “Now go get your swimming stuff.”

“Don’t miss me too much, Harrington,” Eddie winks at Steve and leaves the kitchen. In the hallway he gives Robin a little wave as he walks past her and she gives him the thumbs up in return, still talking to Nancy. He will have to grab her later and demand an explanation for what she said earlier. 

The trailer is quiet when Eddie arrives back home. Wayne must still be sleeping off his last shift. Fortunately for Eddie, because he knows Wayne would have taken one look at Eddie’s shirt and asked when Eddie was going to bring the Harrington boy around for dinner. And Eddie would have had another crisis, thinking so much about Steve until he would have gotten a migraine. 

They need to talk about the delicate, highly explosive, life-changing thing between them eventually. And they should do it soon because the longer Eddie allows himself to self-indulge in the feelings he has for Steve, the more it’s going to hurt when Steve rejects him. But as long as they don’t talk about it, Eddie can tell himself that Steve might actually feel the same. If they talk about it, Eddie might have a definite answer, but that answer is still very likely to be a rejection. He pushes the thought away and goes on the hunt for his trunks instead. 

It takes a lot of sorting through his shit before he finds them hidden in the back of one of his drawers and puts them on instantly, not wanting to change at Steve’s house. He decides to grab a towel, some shorts and another shirt, just in case Steve actually tries to put him into a polo shirt this time. He might be quite gone on Steve, but Eddie does draw the line at polo shirts. 

He is almost ready to leave when his eyes land on his battered copy of The Fellowship of the Ring on his desk . He takes it too, just in case Steve needs another distraction. And Eddie is definitely due another reread. His mother once told him that if one doesn’t reread Lord of the Rings at least once every three years, the dark forces win. It had been a stupid little joke, but it stuck with Eddie. 

He opens the front page of the book and stares at the in dark ink-written initials of his mom. They have, just like the memories he has of her, started to fade. He knows he should resent her for leaving him. But he can’t blame her for not wanting to raise him alone after his deadbeat father had gone to jail. Maybe she knew Eddie would become too much like him and ran. He wonders if she read his name in the papers and congratulated herself on being a smart woman. 

Eddie closes the book and puts it in his backpack. He eyes his bed. For a moment he considers changing again, lying down and just hiding from the world. But he tells himself that his friends want him at the pool party. Steve wants him at the pool party. Eddie does not see at all whatever Steve might see when he looks at Eddie. But maybe one day he can catch a glimpse of Steve’s vision in his own reflection. See the kind of man people run to, to keep him from bleeding out, instead of the boy to run away from as an act of self-preservation. 

He shakes his head, grabs his backpack and writes Wayne a quick note. It’s far too sunny to wallow, he decides and leaves the trailer. 

It’s early afternoon by the time Eddie gets back to Steve’s. The sun is still burning mercilessly down on them and cooling down at the pool sounds heavenly actually. 

It’s Robin who opens the door, wrapped in a towel and the smell of chlorine and sun lotion. 

“Took you long enough,” she greets him and steps aside so he can enter the house. The hallway of the Harrington residence is pleasantly cool. He can see goosebumps creeping over Robin’s skin. 

“Couldn’t find my swimming trunks,” he shrugs, before realizing that this is the perfect time to ask Robin about earlier. “Listen, Robin, can we ta—,” 

“Eddie!” He hears Vickie’s voice and suddenly two very wet arms are wrapped around him, soaking his shirt. 

“Hi, Vickie.” He had forgotten how enthusiastic she could be. Band geeks. He tries not to wince about his wet shirt. Still, it’s what he really likes about her. They weren’t friends, but she never called him a freak in school. She lent him a pencil in biology once and let him copy her English homework. It’s probably why he always let her rob him blind when he sold her weed. And it’s why he is allowing himself to enjoy her casual affection. Despite the wet arms. 

She grins at him once she lets go and grabs Robin’s hand.

“Sorry to whisk her away but Steve is about to put Journey on again and someone with authority and good taste in music needs to stop him. I know Jonathan will just put on The Smiths again.” 

“Oh god, no whisk away. That’s a national emergency,” Eddie says extremely seriously and Vickie giggles, before rushing Robin back out on the terrace. Eddie follows them slowly, he’ll have to talk to Robin later. 

He is almost sorry when he leaves the cool living room and steps back outside into the heat. Then he spots Steve across the terrace and considers turning around on his heels because nope, no, no, no, nope, Eddie cannot do this. 

It’s ridiculous really. This morning he had a half-naked Steve pressed against him, but somehow the sight of Steve in short shorts and a crop top is too much for Eddie. He should look away, he really should but his eyes linger. From Steve’s stomach down to the waistband of his shorts runs a thin happy trail that Eddie would love to follow with his mouth. The thin piece of fabric that doesn’t even really qualify as shorts anymore, reveals quite a lot of Steve’s thighs. They would look lovely with a hand wrapped around them, long fingers splayed over the toned muscles to hold them in place while Eddie’s lips and teeth press against them. Maybe even dig his nails into the tender skin, leaving matching bruises and hickeys. The backyard suddenly has gotten very hot. 

A loud splash from the pool makes Eddie look away and instead watch Vickie and Robin chase each other in the pool. Nancy and Jonathan are also already there. They are sitting on the edge of the pool, their legs dangling in the water. Nancy’s face is tense. Jonathan is soothingly rubbing his hand up and down Nancy’s arm, before taking her hand and pressing kisses to her knuckles. She begins to relax slightly and Eddie’s eyes are flickering back to Steve who is mixing together some sort of fruit punch. 

Eddie drops his backpack on one of the deck chairs and because he feels slightly overdressed takes off his shirt, leaving him in nothing but his swim trunks. He tries not to be self-conscious. All of them except Vickie have scars, even though he and Steve got the worst of it. Still, he holds his breath when he looks up and towards the others, but none of them are paying attention to him. Vickie and Robin are too busy splashing each other and Nancy is deep in conversation with Jonathan. There are no sneers of disgust or dirty glances aimed at him and Eddie feels himself relax. 

When he turns his head he catches Steve staring. He doesn’t mind that though. Steve can stare a little if he wants to. Feeling self-assured and just a little bit smug, Eddie walks over. Steve’s eyes keep following him. 

“My eyes are up here, Harrington,” Eddie teases and Steve’s eyes actually snap up from his chest to his face. 

“Punch?” he offers with a half-hearted smile. Steve is trying to be in full host mode, flashing his teeth and dishing out drinks to distract from what’s bothering him, but Eddie can tell that he is not doing well. The tension in his shoulders is almost visible and his eyes are constantly flickering back to the pool. 

“Sure,” Eddie shrugs and watches Steve carefully as Steve ladles some of the punch into a red plastic cup. “Quite lavish for a pool party though. Did you run out of beer?” 

“No cans or glass near the pool when swimming,” Steve says and hands the cup to Eddie. “Or knives or other sharp objects.” 

Eddie raises his eyebrows and swallows the question whether having fun is allowed or not. Steve for one definitely is not having fun right now. Eddie wishes he knew how to change it. 

He lifts the cup to his lips and takes a sip. It’s sweet, almost sickly so until a hint of lime and alcohol kicks in. Overall it’s a pretty decent punch. Eddie can feel it stick to his teeth and glue his mouth shut. 

“It’s good,” he says and takes another sip. “This isn’t a drink the kool-aid situation though is it?” 

It gets a snort out of Steve. A small victory at least. 

“You’re the cult leader man, I just mix the drinks,” he says and demonstratively stirs the punch. He then fills some in a cup for himself and walks over to the deck chairs. Eddie follows him. 

“We both know the little gremlins are ten times more likely to actually do what you say though,” Eddie points out as they both sit down on their respective chairs. “Not to mention you were the King of Hawkins High.” 

“That’s not a cult, that’s a constitutional monarchy.”

“Oh, big word, Stevie. Did Dustin teach you?”

Steve flips him off, but the small grin on his lips is real at least. His comparison is surprisingly apt though, Eddie realizes. High School with its unspoken rules and the King and Queen only as figureheads. Break the rules, go against the grain just one time and your oh-so-devoted subjects will dethrone you in a second. Like most things in High School status or power are an illusion. Eddie is glad that part of his life is fucking over. The sun continues to burn down on them. 

Sweat runs down Eddie’s neck, making his hair stick uncomfortably to his skin. He gathers his hair and in an attempt to keep it up twists it into a bun that of course falls apart. He groans. Maybe Steve has a pencil or something to hold Eddie’s hair together. 

Before he can ask, a hair tie is tapped against his arm. Surprised, Eddie looks at it and then at Steve holding it out for him. He isn’t even looking at Eddie, eyes focused on Robin dunking Vickie underwater with a giggle. Almost absentmindedly, he taps it again against Eddie’s arm and Eddie takes it. 

“Thanks?” he says and ties his hair up. Steve only hums, eyes still on the pool. It’s such a small gesture that makes Eddie feel so much. None of the girls have hair long enough for hair ties, so Steve must have just carried that one around for him, even though Eddie never verbally complained about his hair. 

Steve’s eyes flicker to him briefly, but instead of turning back to the pool, he keeps looking at Eddie. 

“You look good…with…with your hair up,” he says and it’s such an honest compliment, lacking their usual teasing or snark that Eddie doesn’t really know what to do with it. The same way he doesn’t really know what to do with Steve carrying a hair tie around just for him. Or knows how Eddie takes his coffee. It’s such fucking mundane things. Things that don’t even matter really, but Steve makes them feel like they do. Like Eddie’s likes and dislikes, habits and tendencies are important enough to pay attention to, to remember. 

Steve hates pineapple on pizza but loves it on his grilled cheese. He likes being up early but loathes waking up any time of day. He doesn’t chew on pencils but always taps them against his lips. Steve looks at Eddie and Eddie looks back at Steve. 

“Thanks?” he echoes his earlier words, still not knowing what to say. The tension between them is as fragile as it is thick. But today is not the day to cut it. He’ll tell Steve. All the things he wants to say, the mundane, the big, the secrets and the obvious facts. Soon, when the taste of sweat and cowardice doesn’t coat his tongue and the stench of chlorine and past memories no longer weighs heavy on Steve’s mind. Maybe tomorrow, or maybe next week. They have time, for once, sitting next to Steve, it feels like they have time. 

They are quiet after that, both drinking their punch, watching the others enjoy the afternoon. Nancy takes one deep breath and then lets herself fall into the pool. Jonathan remains on the edge, waiting for her to come up. 

Eddie can hear him softly say, “Are you alright?” when Nancy emerges. She nods, takes his hand and pulls him into the pool with her. At least one less traumatized person. Vickie and Robin are delighted and instantly drag Nancy and Jonathan into some sort of water polo. Steve watches them, more wistfully than anxious now. 

“You could just dip your feet in?” Eddie suggests, but Steve shakes his head. 

“I think for today, letting other people swim in the pool is enough exposure therapy,” he says. “Maybe one day though. If I absolutely have to.” 

“Well, I have a kiddie pool behind my trailer, if you ever want to practice?” Eddie offers and gets Steve to laugh. It’s a horrendously cheesy thought, but god, Eddie loves the sound of it. 

“What about you,” Steve asks once he’s finished laughing. “You’re not gonna go in?” 

Eddie shakes his head. He would like to. Dive into the cool water and see how long he can hold his breath. Close his eyes and float on his back. Splash water into Robin’s face and hear her squeal. Anything really to escape the heat. But he isn’t going to. 

“Do you have any idea what those chemicals would do to these curls?” 

The answer is absolutely nothing, but Steve doesn’t need to know that. 

“Plus, I have this,” he says and grabs the book from his backpack “Greatest piece of literature ever written.” 

“If you say so,” Steve shrugs and Eddie leans back, opens the book and pretends to read. He can feel Steve’s eyes rest on him. After a moment Eddie glances over the top of the book directly at Steve. 

“Want me to read it to you?” 

Steve’s eyes grow wide at the offer. He chews his lips, hesitant. Based on what Eddie knows about Steve, he suddenly wonders if anyone actually ever read to Steve.  It only makes him hope more that Steve says yes. 

“Eh…yeah…sure, read….read away, man,” he finally says in an awkward stammer and leans back in his chair. 

“Prepare to have your mind blown, Stevie,” Eddie grins, giddy, and turns back to the front page. He casts one last glance at Steve, who is looking back expectantly, clears his throat, and begins to read, “When Mr. Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday with a party of special magnificence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton.” 

The afternoon passes into evening. Eddie’s voice becomes slightly hoarse and Steve gets up to get him water. The summer heat goes from oppressive to bearable. Bearable enough that when Steve returns he doesn’t sit back in his own chair, but squeezes himself right next to Eddie. He gives Eddie a timid glance as if to ask is this okay?   Eddie just lifts his arm so Steve can rest his head on Eddie’s chest. They aren’t battling nightmares or just waking up like this, there is no excuse, no reason other than wanting to be close. 

Eddie continues to read and Steve’s fingers brush gently over Eddie’s ribcage. It tickles lightly, just like Steve’s hair on his chest, but Eddie relishes in it rather than letting the touch distract him.  Steve closes his eyes and the pool is gone, all there is is Eddie’s voice, the Shire and Samwise Gamgee hiding in Frodo’s garden. Eddie’s fingers flick through the pages until the light is too dim to properly make out the words. Steve seems half asleep. Eddie lowers the book and gingerly caresses one hand up and down Steve’s shoulder. 

“Baby,” he whispers. “We need to turn on your garden lights.” 

It takes him a second too long to realize what he just said, but the expected panic, tying itself around Eddie’s throat until he chokes on it, doesn’t happen. Steve doesn’t move. 

“Steve,” Eddie whispers again, this time a bit louder and Steve stirs. With a groan, he lifts his head and blinks up at Eddie. 

Eddie has a distinct sense of deja-vu, only that this time it’s the moonlight making Steve’s tired smile luminescent. 

“We should turn on your garden lights,” Eddie repeats and Steve grimaces. “C’mon sleeping beauty, up you go.” 

“Don’t wanna,” Steve groans, but nevertheless gets up. Maybe he does have a point. Eddie resists the urge to say screw the lights and pull Steve back down again. 

The other four have also cuddled up on the deck chairs. Vickie is dozing on Robin’s shoulder, who’s playing some sort of card game with Nancy and Jonathan. 

“Look, who’s finally awake,” Nancy whisper-shouts as they walk past them. Steve flips her off too. 

They reach the first light and Steve picks it up from the floor. “It’s very simple,” he says and turns it around so Eddie can see where the switch is. “Just flick it and on it goes.”

“Cool, I take this side of the pool, you the other?”

Steve nods and they both go their way, turning on lights, dipping the garden into a cool glow. Relatively quickly, Eddie reaches his last light, right next to the pool and bends down to turn it on. 

When he comes back up, he immediately knows he’s made a mistake. The dizziness is overwhelming for a short second and then everything is black and gone. 

He hears the splash of his body hitting the pool before he feels the water enter his lungs. The cold waves wake him up instantly. But before he can even move, an arm is wrapped around his waist and he is pulled up to the surface. He gasps for air as Steve drags him out of the pool onto the terrace. 

“Eddie?” Steve's hands are on him, cradling his face. Eddie has to cough and instantly two fingers are pressed against his pulse. Eddie tries to bat them away, he just blacked out and fell into the pool. He’s been through worse. The way Steve looks at him though, he apparently would disagree. He’s never seen Steve with such a stern expression on his face, his entire body rigid. Only his bottom lip is trembling slightly. Eddie gets an uneasy feeling. 

“I’m fine,” he says and sits up. Something warm and sticky drops directly into his eye. When he wipes it away his fingertips come back red. Oh. He lies back on the floor. 

Steve gets up, his hands clenched into fists. “We should go inside,” he says calm but insistent. His eyes are wandering over the backyard. “Get away from the pool.” The muscles in his back are tense, contracting with dread and apprehension. Eddie’s vision becomes blurry again, but he manages to remain conscious. 

Both Robin and Vickie bend over Eddie. Robin winces sympathetically. 

“Ouch, does it hurt much?” she asks quietly and pushes a strand of wet hair out of Eddie’s face. He tries to sit up again, to see what’s going on with Steve, but Robin’s hand presses him back down gently. A good idea, his head is still spinning. 

“Don’t really feel anything,” he admits and focuses on Robin’s face. “What’s the damage?” 

“Cut your eyebrow on the diving board,” Vickie informs him. “It’s bleeding a lot, but should be fine.” 

Steve is saying something, but Eddie can’t quite make it out. But he can tell from the tone of voice that Steve is a second away from losing it. Just because he is quiet, doesn’t mean he is calm. It’s anticipation, waiting for the inevitable bad thing to happen and getting ready to fight it before it even has a chance to attack. Eddie wishes he could get to him. Tell him that it’s alright. That it doesn’t even hurt. But of course, he has to lie on the stupid terrace floor unable to move without seeing stars. 

“Steve, it’s fine!” he hears Nancy’s strict voice. “The gates are closed!”  

“That’s what we thought the last time!” Steve hisses. Their entire conversation is hushed as if a predator circling the pool could hear them if they were too loud. 

“El would know! It’s fine, Steve,” Nancy repeats. “They aren’t going to get him!” 

Eddie manages to lift his head without getting more blood into his eye. Nancy is standing in front of Steve, hands clasped on his shoulders. He looks like a marble statue, pale and stiff. It’s the faintest shaking of his fists that still makes him seem human. Jonathan is standing next to Steve too, one hand cautiously put on his upper arm. 

“Why don’t you take Eddie inside to get him stitched up, we guard the pool,” he suggests. “You could also call El.” 

Steve looks as if he is about to throw up, but at least he finally unclenches his fists. Getting him away from the pool seems like a good move. Eddie clears his throat and all three instantly turn around to him. 

“I’m fine,” he repeats. “But a band-aid or something might be nice?” 

Steve bites his lip, like he doesn’t like the idea of leaving everyone outside, but then nods quickly. 

“I’ve got a kit inside,” he says as Vickie and Robin help Eddie sit up. More blood is dripping into his eye, but at least he doesn’t feel like blacking out again. 

“C’mon then Harrington,” he musters a weak grin that Steve doesn’t reciprocate. “Stitch me up and mend my wounds.” 

“It’s not funny,” Steve hisses as his hand closes around Eddie’s wrist tightly and he pulls him inside. “Nancy?”

“We’ll take care of the pool! Just go!” she tells them.

As soon as they are inside, Steve loses his composure. The rigid tension turns into adrenaline and he basically runs up the stairs. Eddie struggles to follow him.

“Would you slow down, Harrington,” he grumbles, but Steve ignores him. He grabs the nail-covered bat from his bedroom and drags Eddie into the upstairs bathroom. His grip on Eddie’s wrist remains tight. He slams the bathroom door behind them and twists the lock so hard that Eddie is surprised it doesn’t break. 

Steve finally lets go of him, just to swing his bat and hold it towards the door as if he expected the upside down to manifest right behind it. His entire body is shaking now and his breathing becomes so fast, that he is close to hyperventilating. 

Very cautiously Eddie steps closer and puts his hand on Steve’s upper arm. 

“Steve,” he whispers and gently tries to lower Steve’s arm. “It’s alright.” Steve trembles under the touch.  

He ignores Eddie for a moment but then lets his arm be pushed down. The bat clunks on the floor. Slowly, Eddie turns Steve around. He is still panting, his eyes twitching. Panic still clings to him. 

“I’m fine,” Eddie continues to whisper. “We are safe. Nancy said so.” 

He takes Steve’s hand and presses it against his own chest. 

“See, heart still beating,” he says and Steve stares at Eddie’s hand resting on top of his own. His breath finally slows. 

“That’s good, Steve, in and out,” Eddie says and inhales and exhales calmly. Steve mimics the rhythm. “You’re doing so well, sweetheart.” 

He’ll agonize about the pet name later, getting Steve to calm down has priority right now. And Steve finally does. He stops shivering and the sheer panic leaves his face.  

He keeps his hand and eyes on Eddie’s chest. 

“You remember Barbara Holland?” he says after they just stand like that for a while, breathing in and out. 

“I didn’t know her personally, but yeah?” 

“Last pool party I threw. She came here with Nancy. Shotgunned a beer to be cool and cut herself,” Steve takes another long inhale and exhale. “Nancy and I went upstairs and Barb…she stayed behind. Dropped some blood into the pool. Don’t know if demogorgons are like sharks, but he…he came and took her. Killed her on the bottom of the pool in the upside down.”

Steve shakes his head, panic replaced by guilt. 

“If I had been there if I had just fucking been there instead of being upstairs trying to get with Nancy like some stupid teenage boy.” 

“If I hadn’t sold Chrissy drugs, she’d still be alive too.” Steve looks up at him and opens his mouth to disagree, but Eddie continues. “If I had known her favorite song I could have saved her.” 

“That’s different!”

“Is it Steve?” Eddie asks. “Even if you had been there, what would you have done? Tried to wrestle the demogorgon? Challenge him to a basketball game, see who can get the most hoops?” 

Steve stays quiet. Eddie knows it's a point they will always disagree about. The same way he will always think Chrissy’s death was his fault and Steve will always tell him otherwise. 

“We should get you cleaned up,” Steve says finally and gently pushes Eddie towards the bathtub. He sits down on the brink while Steve opens the bathroom cabinet to get a first aid kit out. 

Eddie has seen the violence that Steve is capable of, the force of his punches and the brutality with which he swings his bat. He can be vicious and tough, break an abusive jock’s nose or bite off a bat’s head. But when he touches Eddie, it’s gentle. 

His fingers are ever so faintly splayed over Eddie’s jaw when he takes a wet cloth and carefully cleans the blood off Eddie’s face. He stands between Eddie’s legs, their torsos almost touching and Eddie automatically puts his hands on Steve’s waist to keep himself steady. 

The fabric under his fingertips is damp and for the first time, Eddie truly realizes that Steve jumped into the pool for him. He hates that pool more than anything really, literally said earlier he would never want to get in it again. And yet without hesitation, he dove right after Eddie. He lifts his head and looks up at Steve. 

His hair is once again flat and dripping water down his neck. He’s concentrating on the cut on Eddie’s brow, a small frown on his face and Eddie wants to get up and kiss it away. Whisper against Steve’s skin what he means to him, thank Steve for making him feel alive. Tell Steve all the things he likes so much about him that on some days his chest physically hurts. But he doesn’t. He just watches Steve. 

“This might hurt a little,” Steve says apologetically when he takes the disinfectant and sprays it on Eddie’s wound. It does in fact burn and Eddie hisses. But the pain is nothing compared to the tender brush of Steve’s thumb over Eddie’s cheekbone. 

“I’m sorry,” he murmurs and his face is so close to Eddie’s. His right hand gingerly cups Eddie’s jaw, while his left is rummaging for the right kind of band-aid in the first aid kit. Eddie allows himself to lean into the touch.  

“I don’t think you’ll need stitches,” Steve says as he puts a thin band-aid on the cut. “But it’ll probably leave a scar.”

“What’s one more,” Eddie shrugs. Steve’s frown grows. With the faintest touch, he runs his finger over the band-aid, making sure it’s smooth. It twinges slightly, but it’s worth it. 

“You’ll look metal as fuck,” he says quietly and takes one last look at the wound. A second passes. Then another. Steve doesn’t lean back, doesn’t take his hands off Eddie’s face. 

It’s horrible timing. Steve is coming down from a panic attack, Eddie is bleeding. Neither of them cares as they stare into each other’s eyes. The aren’t you going to kiss it better, dies on Eddie’s lips alongside his principle that they should talk about this first. He raises his chin. Steve bends down. 

Then a pulsing pain erupts from Eddie’s temple and the vision of his right eye goes completely red. 

“Shit, maybe you do need stitches.” 

“Ya think?” 

They all pile into Eddie’s van, while Steve drives them to the hospital. It’s touching, even though Eddie assures all of them that he is fine. He has a rolled-up polo shirt pressed against his cut, soaking it with blood. Good riddance, he thinks. 

At the hospital, everything goes relatively quick. The emergency room is fairly empty and Eddie gets seen by a doctor almost immediately. No one else is allowed to come with him, no matter how much they protest. 

“It’s just stitches, Harrington,” he tells Steve, who stares more viciously at the doctor than he ever did at Vecna. “I’ll be in and out in a jiffy.” 

And it really doesn’t take long. He gets a local anesthetic, a whole of three stitches, some painkillers (the good stuff he does sometimes sell at parties) and is let back out in the waiting room. 

To his surprise, Wayne is sitting right next to Steve and the others. All of them look incredibly relieved when he comes out. 

“Thought I told you no more hospitals for a year,” Wayne greets him and pulls him in a hug. 

“Sorry,” Eddie whispers, honestly feeling bad. The last time Wayne got a call from Steve from inside a hospital, Eddie was almost dying. “It’s just a scratch this time.”  

“Yeah, Steve here told me,” Wayne says and lets go of Eddie. “Still good that he called me.”  

Steve steps closer, Eddie can see his hand twitch, but Steve doesn’t reach out. 

“You gonna be alright?” he asks. 

“They said it’s gonna be a struggle, but Eddie the Brow Bleeder will most likely live to fight another day,” Eddie grins and Steve rolls his eyes. 

“You’re so dramatic.” 

“You love me for it.” 

Wayne clears his throat. Both Eddie and Steve flush. It’s nice to see some color returning to Steve’s cheeks though, his earlier panic completely gone. 

“We should get you home,” Wayne says and gives Eddie a very pointed look and Eddie nods. 

He claps one hand on Steve’s shoulder, even though he would love to do a lot of other things right now. 

“Can’t keep the old man waiting,” he sighs. “I’ll see you around.” He looks over Steve’s shoulder. Behind him Robin, Vickie, Nancy and Jonathan are sitting, all watching their exchange as if it was the next Back to the Future movie. “Bye guys,” he says and waves. All of them wave back with a grin. He takes his hand off Steve’s shoulder. 

“Bye Eddie,” Steve says quietly. 

“Bye Steve,” Eddie echoes, and suddenly feels heavy. He takes a step back, gives Steve one last smile and then turns around and follows Wayne to the parking lot. His eyebrow throbs slightly. 

They are quiet for most of the drive. Wayne is focused on the road and Eddie can’t help but worry about Steve. He seemed more alright when they left the hospital, but he knows that just because Steve seems alright doesn’t mean he actually is. He considers asking Wayne to drop him off at Steve’s house instead. Make sure Steve is sleeping in his bed with a pillow in his arms and not his bat. But maybe Eddie being near Steve’s pool again would only agitate Steve more. He’ll call tomorrow to make sure Steve is alright. Or as alright as he can be. 

“So,” Wayne breaks the silence after a while. “When are you going to invite that Harrington boy around for dinner?” 

Eddie lets out a groan and Wanye chuckles. He knew this would come. Carefully, Eddie leans his head against the cool glass of the window and stares outside. Hawkins at night is as beautiful as it is terrifying. 

Soon, he hopes. Soon. 

Notes:

If I have to stop them from kissing one more time I am going to lose it. Who came up with this concept?? Can't wait to finally *finally* make them kiss next chapter.

Anyways, I hope you became just as unhinged about this chapter as I did when writing it, feel free to yell at me in the comments or leave kudos <3

Chapter 6: Kiss

Notes:

Hiiii, if you have not seen it yet my friend Mossy drew incredible, breathtaking art
of the DnD scene of chapter four and if you have a tumblr should go and give them all the love in the tags for it!!

The surface of the pool is still when the first rays of sun start to glisten on it. The quiet chirping of birds that has filled the air for a few hours now, grows louder. Dew is forming on the dried-out summer grass. Steve can hear a car driving by on the road. The smell of morning coffee wafts over from one of his neighbors. Suburban serenity. Steve’s fingers tighten around his bat. It’s peace made out of plastic, paid for with flashy credit cards, buying a false promise of safety. None of them have any idea that there is a monster in Steve’s pool.

He stares at his unmoving reflection in the turquoise water. The pink of the morning sky matches the purple under his eyes perfectly and clashes with the red of the dried blood under his fingernails. His knees are pressed against his chest, to hold in the sob that’s been wanting to escape his lungs for hours. Not yet. Dawn means he can get up. They don’t come out during the daylight. But he can’t get himself to move. He just sits, eyes on the water, waiting for it to ripple.

Another car drives by. Doors slam, steps come closer. If his parents have decided to come home early, today really isn’t the day for it. He doesn’t turn around. He keeps his eyes steady on the pool. His reflection is joined by El and Nancy.

“Steve?” Nancy says carefully and Steve finally turns his head around. He tries to get a read of her body language, see if imminent danger is around the corner. She does look concerned, but he can tell that he is the reason for that. Not the upside down.

El doesn’t approach Steve with the same caution, doesn’t see the bleeding animal that might bite even though you just want to help. She walks over, puts her hand on Steve’s shoulder and simply says, “The gates are closed. I checked.”

Steve nods. His fingers finally let go off the bat. The monster in Steve’s pool remains trapped underwater.

“Thank you,” he says quietly and looks at the terrace floor, feeling slightly ashamed at all the panic he has harbored inside his chest during the night. His eyes land on the orange sandals El is wearing. They are chunky, covered in neon pink flowers and would look horrendous on anyone but her.

“I watched Eddie sleep,” she adds and Steve’s eyes snap back up to her. “You were in his dream. Good dream. You laughed.”

Nancy fails to hide a very amused smile and Steve can feel his cheeks glow.

“Do you want breakfast?” He hurries to say before El can reveal more about Eddie’s dreams. Even though Steve has to admit, he is very curious. “I think I have eggos.”

Actually, all Steve wants is to collapse into bed and pass out from exhaustion. But the smile El gives him as she follows him inside is worth it. He pops the eggos into the toaster and puts on coffee for him and Nancy. El knows where Steve keeps his plates and cutlery and takes them out herself. Steve finds some strawberries that didn’t make it into the fruit punch the day before and puts them on the steaming eggos before topping them off with whipped cream. Exactly how El likes them.

She instantly digs in, shoving food in her mouth. “Good,” she says with her mouth still full and Steve is reminded that behind the superpowers, the buzz cut, and the nosebleeds she too is just a kid. She is sitting at the table right next to Steve and Nancy, who drink their coffee in silence. Nancy looks at Steve over the rim of her mug. It looks like they are playing happy little family. It’s odd rather than domestic.

It’s like the washed-out memory of a fantasy long gone. It doesn’t feel exactly wrong, but it isn’t right either. Neither of them wants this. Nancy not at all, and Steve not with her. He still likes the idea of a house filled with the sound of delighted screams and kids’ feet stomping. But now it’s accompanied by guitar strings being gently plucked and hearty laughter. Good night stories read in silly voices and jokes about paternity tests when the kids pick Duran Duran over Dio. Ballet performances that feature excessive head banging and dramatic reenactments of mundane days at school during dinner. The comfortable safety found in the embrace of strong arms and the overprotective, deadly glares of brown eyes at anyone who even dares to look at their kids funny.

It’s a silly little fantasy that maybe is a touch too much. But Steve allows himself to indulge in it if he feels naively optimistic enough to think about a future that doesn’t end with his body stuffed with cotton and a run-down obituary in the Hawkins Post about yet another life tragically lost that the whole town knows by heart now. It’s what he uses to calm himself lying in his empty bed after waking up screaming, thinking about how maybe someday he won’t have to wake up alone. He is aware that he is too attached to it, but he knows despair won’t win wars and so he thinks about the life he could maybe have. And who he could have it with.

The phone rings and rips him out of his thoughts. He gives El and Nancy an apologetic look and walks into the hallway.

“Hello,” he says as he answers it, too tired to longer give a shit about the proper etiquette of answering the phone his parents have drilled into him.

“Wow, you really have become a wild animal,” Eddie replies, amused. “Hearing you all improper and unhinged, not gonna lie it’s  kinda hot.”

El did literally just tell Steve that Eddie is alright, but the wave of relief Steve feels hearing his voice almost knocks him off his feet. He is surprised by his own composure when he deadpans, “You gonna ask me what I’m wearing next?”

“Depends, are you in one of those tiny pairs of shorts?”

Steve is in fact wearing tiny shorts. The same one from last night, still not fully dried despite the summer heat. He can already feel the cold coming. But of course, he isn’t going to tell Eddie that. He’ll never hear the end of it if Eddie found out that Steve sat by his pool all night.

“My scoops ahoy uniform ends mid-thigh,” Steve grins into the phone. On the other end of the line, there is a noise that sounds suspiciously like an object being dropped on the floor.

“Now you’re just fucking with me, Harrington.”

Steve sure would like to be.

“Because I know for a fact you threw that uniform out before the ashes of Star Court Mall had gone cold.”

Steve did, the blood wouldn’t wash out and the detergent couldn’t drown out the chemical smell of truth serum and vomit. And it’s not like he would have to wear it again, his job at Scoops gone alongside the mall. 

He clears his throat.

“Did you need anything?”

“Just letting you know Eddie the Brow Bleeder is still alive and kicking,” Eddie says. “And to let you know that Keith told me to take the week off. So be warned your next shift is with the Keithmeister instead of yours truly.”

Steve lets out a groan. Keith is not the worst boss to have but he is just painfully boring. The nerdiness that makes Eddie endearingly charming makes Keith unbearable. Eddie patiently bothers to explain his references if Steve doesn’t get them, reads him Lord of the Rings books, makes him metal-Steve-might-like mixtapes. When Keith makes a reference Steve doesn’t get Keith waves his in Cheeto dust-covered fingers through the air, pompously declaring that Steve wouldn’t be able to appreciate the original content anyways. His superiority complex is really starting to piss Steve off.

“Don’t miss me too much,” Eddie chuckles upon hearing Steve’s groan. He doesn’t like Keith much either, which does say a lot given that the two of them could easily bond.

  “In your dreams, Munson,” Steve says and then remembers what El had said earlier and promptly blushes.

“Oh, the things we do in my dreams, Stevie.”

Laugh apparently, Steve thinks. For some reason, that flusters him more than the flirty suggestion Eddie was probably aiming for.

“Yeah, yeah enjoy your lazy week on the couch while I have to suffer through my shifts with Keith,” Steff huffs, without meaning it. Even though Eddie had acted all fine last night, the cut had been deep and his brow quite swollen. He needs the recovery and Steve is glad that Keith is giving him the week off, even if it means working with Keith. 

“Oh, you’ll be able to handle Keith, you’re a big boy.”

Steve just rolls his eyes, pointedly ignoring the twisting in his stomach at the nickname.

“I’ll survive,” he sighs dramatically. Eddie snorts on the other end of the line.

“Great, then I can return to my dreams, unworried.”

“Have fun.”

“Dream you and me sure will,” Eddie says before hanging up and Steve lets out another sigh. 

When Steve returns to the kitchen, El is done with her eggos. She is standing next to Nancy at the sink, drying the wet dishes Nancy is handing her. It feels like another slightly off snapshot of a life that they could have had once upon a time.

Once they are done, he walks them to the front door. El gives him a hug before skipping down to Nancy’s car. Nancy lingers in the door.

“It wasn’t your fault, you know,” she says quietly. “I know I acted like it was, but you didn’t do anything.”

“Well maybe if I had done something—“ Steve starts but Nancy cuts him off.

“No,” she shakes her head. “I don’t blame you, so you shouldn’t blame yourself either.”

It takes Steve by surprise. Even with their friendship restored, he had always thought that Nancy did still blame him for Barb’s death. Knowing that she doesn’t, does take some of the weight off, but it still sits heavily on his chest.

“Do you blame yourself?”

“I blame Hawkins’ lab, Brenner,” Nancy’s eyes flicker to El in the car. “The government.”

Steve nods.

“I’ll try,” he says and tries to actually mean it. Part of him knows that the guilt of Barb’s death will always stick to him like a shadow. Nancy’s eyes rest heavily on him, knowing that Steve probably will always feel responsible. Then she takes a deep breath, smiles and gently claps Steve on the shoulder.

“We should go out for dinner soon,” she says. “You, me, Jonathan, Eddie.”

Steve freezes. Part of him wants to play dumb, say that he has no idea what she means. After all, Nancy technically isn’t supposed to be in the know about Eddie and him being queer. The other part of him has already accepted that she knows, but tries to argue that it’s not like that and that he and Eddie are just friends.

But Nancy Wheeler has always been excellent at seeing through bullshit. And the way Steve and Eddie had snuggled up at the pool is quite incriminating evidence. Especially if she overheard the baby, though Steve isn’t quite sure yet if that really happened or if it was just wishful thinking.

“Eh….sure?” He says, very unsure how to feel or what to think. As much as he and Nancy have made up, he never really thought about going on a double date with her. And he especially didn’t think his date would be Eddie Munson, but here they are. “We’re not…we don’t…not yet,” he adds, still blindsided by her offer. “How do you even?”

“You never carried a hair tie for me,” Nancy says. Not to accuse Steve but to explain.

“Because you always had your own and three spare ones.”

She laughs at that.

“He’s good for you,” she smiles. “I think you need someone you can carry a hair tie for.”

Steve blushes. She isn’t wrong though. He likes to be needed, to take care of people, to carry hair ties around for them. It’s why out of all the adults of the Party he is the designated babysitter, no matter how much he fake complains about it. Secretly he dreads the idea of the little gremlins learning how to drive and no longer needing him. A tiny voice in his mind whispers that as long as people need him they won’t leave him. He tries to ignore it.

“I’ll see you at Joyce’s?” he asks.

“You will,” Nancy says and waves goodbye. As she gets into the car, Steve retreats back into the house.

While he patched up Eddie in the bathroom the others had cleaned everything up from the pool party so there isn’t much for Steve to do. He sets an alarm for work and takes a nap.

When he wakes up the summer heat has been replaced by cold wind and drizzly rain. It’s a much-needed relief, but Steve still curses as the water ruins his hair on the way to his car.

His shift with Keith is as uneventful as it is annoying. Robin comes in at some point to rent Little Shop of Horrors and to check in on Steve.

“I can come over tonight,” she offers, having taken one look at the shadows under Steve’s eyes. It’s been a while since they’ve had a sleepover just the two of them. But given that Robin hates musicals yet holds Little Shop of Horrors in her hands and knowing that Vickie loves musicals Steve assumes she has plans and shakes his head.

“I’ll be fine,” he promises and checks out the tape for her.

“Okay, but give me one call if you need me and I’ll be there.”

“Yes, yes I will. Now go enjoy your movie night with Vickie.”

The rest of Steve’s day is mainly spent rewinding tapes, telling people that no, a movie they have seen last night in the cinema is not yet available on tape, and restocking their candy selection. Even though it’s all routine at this point he is still exhausted by the time he gets home. The rain continues and his car lock refuses to work, so when Steve has finally made it through his front door he is completely drenched. 

He turns on the TV in the living room for some background noise, walks into the kitchen to throw some ready meals into the microwave and chucks off his shirt while his food heats up. He is about to go upstairs to grab a new one when he spots some dark fabric, draped over one of the kitchen chairs. 

Steve walks over and picks it up. It’s a black Metallica shirt. Eddie must have left it in the chaos of the night before. It looks comfy, well worn and without thinking, Steve puts it on. It’s soft, a bit loose on Steve’s shoulders and it still smells like Eddie. Steve catches his reflection in the mirror and he looks good in it. He’ll definitely keep the shirt. After all, Eddie already has three of his, not counting the blood-soaked polo Steve disposed of at the hospital. 

The memory of the dark red soaking through the baby blue fabric tightens around Steve’s throat like a noose. Eddie is fine, Steve tells himself, he knows that Eddie is fine. It’s been less than 12 hours since they last spoke, yet dread crawls up Steve’s spine ready to seep into his muscles, forcing him to spend another night outside at the pool, bat ready for swinging. Almost on autopilot, Steve walks to the phone and dials Eddie’s number. It only rings twice before someone picks up. 

“I’m still alive, Stevie,” Eddie answers the phone casually and the sound of his voice breaks the tension in Steve’s body so instantly, that Steve almost feels like a twig being snapped in half. 

“How did you know it was me?” Steve asks, grabs the cable and drags the phone into the living room. He never understood why his parents insisted on such an extra long cable, given that they are never home to use the phone, but he sure is grateful for it now. He sits down on the couch and swallows a whine when the backrest digs harshly into his back.

“El isn’t the only one with superpowers.”

“What, you’re a mind reader now?” 

“God, I wish,” Eddie laughs and Steve wants to record it and put it on a mixtape. “Your shift ended an hour ago. Enough time to drive home, heat up leftovers, sit in your living room on that uncomfortable couch and start to worry your pretty head.”

“I don’t know if I should be impressed or creeped out.” It’s actually quite touching that Eddie knows his habits so well.

“Local satanic cult leader knows your schedule, I’d be shaking in my boots.”

“Clutching my pearls as we speak,” Steve deadpans and actually places his hand on his neck.

“Mmmnh you’re wearing the matching apron and heels?”

Steve has to grin. He wonders how Eddie would react if Steve told him that he was wearing his Metallica shirt right now. He is still very proud of himself for not spontaneously combusting when Eddie had walked into the kitchen in Steve’s Tears for Fears shirt. He decides not to mention it and to wait for Eddie’s reaction in person. 

“Are you gonna ask me what I’m wearing every time I’m gonna call from now on?” he asks and suppresses a yawn. His eyes are already burning slightly.

“Can’t a man, seriously injured, possibly on his death bed not have any entertainment?”

“Need me to come over and play nurse?” Steve’s voice is dripping with sarcasm, unimpressed by Eddie’s dramatics.

“As much as I would love to see that,” Eddie says and Steve rolls his eyes, “I think you should actually get some sleep tonight instead of worrying about other people.”

Steve opens his mouth to protest, but Eddie already cuts him off.

“And don’t try to talk yourself out of it or I’m calling Wheeler so she can come over and tuck you into bed!”

“And they call me mom,” Steve grumbles. “Fine, I’ll go sleep.”

“Good boy.”

This time, Steve almost does drop the phone. The earpiece burns against Steve’s ear like a piece of hot coal, or maybe it’s his flushed face that burns against the phone.  He can literally hear Eddie grin at the other end of the line.

“Yeah, yeah whatever, Night Munson,” his voice only shakes ever so slightly.

“Night, Night Stevie,” Eddie chuckles and then hangs up.

Steve stares at the phone a moment longer. God, he hates Eddie.

The rest of the week is a bit of a blur. The rain stays and the people return from the pools to the video stores.  Steve works long shifts almost every day and drives the kids to the arcade on his one afternoon off. He has lunch with Robin on his break and helps Mrs Henderson with her groceries before his shift. He gets home, orders takeout, lives his life, trying his best to ignore the quiet before the storm feeling.

He calls Eddie and Eddie calls him. It becomes a habit that week. Phone cords wrapped around fingers, hushed tones, and fond eye rolls so extreme they are almost audible. Steve complains about customers and Keith, Eddie talks about his campaign and ideas for songs he’s been working on.

Steve would love to hang out, but work is busy and Eddie suffers from dizzy spells almost every day now. The doctors at the hospital told him to just sleep them off. And so they stick to calls, talking until they’ve run out of stuff to say, or on most nights until one of them falls asleep. Steve has woken up several nights with the beeping phone in bed next to him. He'd feel bad about falling asleep on Eddie, but his voice is just so nice and calming, lulling Steve right into sleep. And Eddie doesn’t seem to mind.

One night when Steve is too exhausted to talk but still too on edge from his shift to fall asleep, Eddie continues reading The Fellowship of the Ring for him over the phone. For the first time, Steve truly regrets not having gone over to Eddie’s trailer after work. That night for once he doesn’t dream about demogorgons and underground Russian labs, but green shires and brown eyes. 

Robin comes over the night of the 3rd. They don’t even attempt to sleep in Steve’s bed. Instead, they drag blankets and pillows down into the living room and onto Steve’s couch. They put on a season of Golden Girls that Steve taped a couple of months ago and snack on some crackers, neither of them able to stomach the taste of popcorn since last summer.

They don’t say much, let Betty White’s snark and canned laughter echo through the empty house. All of the lights are turned on, making it seem like Christmas in July.

At some point, Steve does drift off. He wakes up at 4 am with a stiff neck and to an empty couch. The door to the terrace is open and cold night air wafts in. Steve rubs his eyes, pulls the blanket over his shoulders like a cloak and steps outside.

Robin sits on the terrace, legs crossed, staring into the woods behind Steve’s house. Wordlessly, he sits down next to her and drapes half of the blanket over her back. She shifts closer and rests her head on his shoulder. Robin’s knee presses against Steve’s, her skin cold. They take each other’s hands, intertwine their fingers and just sit there.

The monster in Steve’s pool is quiet, the monster in Steve and Robin’s mind is not. Steve wonders if it will ever stop. The sleepless nights, the panic because of flickering lights and the nausea whenever he steps into a mall. The twinge of guilt at the nape of his neck when Robin wakes up screaming and he can’t help but think how he dragged her into this. The heartbreak when one of the kids goes quiet and just stares into space. On nights like these Steve is afraid it will never end.

Robin can tell, as always reads Steve’s mind like an open book and snuggles against him.

“I hate what happened last summer,” she says quietly. “But meeting you was one of the best things that’s happened to me.”

“Me too,” Steve shifts his head and presses a kiss on Robin’s forehead. “You’re my person.”

He doesn’t think he’s ever loved someone as much as he does her. It’s a miracle really, that he knows how to. His parents never taught him how to ride a bike or fry an egg, but they tried their best to teach him distance and disapproval. Make him value superiority over compassion, money over the waste that is affection.

But under the coat of hardened gold they had dipped him in the second the umbilical cord had been cut, Steve has always been too soft, too tender-hearted. And not even the extra layer of plastic people like Tommy H. and Carol had poured over him had been able to suffocate that little bit of warmth simmering at his core, wanting to burn.

He is glad he is not his father's son. Carries his parent’s disappointment like a badge on his chest, proof that he is human and his heart is beating. He looks at Robin. If he hadn’t been able to love, he would have learned just for her.

“You’re my person too,” she squeezes his hand. “Dingus.”

They hold each other until dawn. They get their usual from the diner and feel slightly more human after their third cup of coffee. Still, the day weighs on them.

When they reach the trailer park Robin climbs into the back seat while Steve gets out to get Eddie and Max. Max is already sitting outside her trailer, headphones blasting music so loud Steve can make out the song. It’s hard to hear the too familiar sound without the memory of Max floating in the air, her eyes turning white. Steve swallows his nausea. It makes sense that Max would need this song on a day like today.

When she sees him approach she gets up and wordlessly hugs him. He holds her tighter than usual.

“We don’t have to go, you know,” he says while petting her hair. “I could drive you anywhere you’d want.”

Max lets go and shakes her head.

“I wanna be with the others today.” She bends down and grabs the backpack sitting next to the stairs of her trailer. “Sleeping over at El’s tonight anyways.”

It’s good that Max won’t be alone tonight. As far as Steve knows all the kids are staying over at the Beyers’ house tonight. Or at least no one has requested him to drive them home yet. Robin too is later meeting up with Vickie and staying with her. She had first insisted that she’ll stay with Steve and keep him company but Steve wouldn’t have it. He had to basically force Robin to accept the invitation. He can manage this night alone.

He hears another trailer door fall shut and out of the corner of his eyes he spots Eddie. His heartbeat picks up ever so slightly at the idea that he might not actually have to spend the night alone.

“Alright,” Steve says and resists the urge to hold out his hand for Max to take. She is almost sixteen and even on a day like today, she would tease him relentlessly for it. Instead, he just puts his arm around her shoulder, which she does accept without the typical eye roll.

Eddie is leaning against the hood of the car, grin plastered on his face and chatting to Robin in the back seat. There is still a thin band-aid across his brow, but the swelling has gone down. He looks good, at ease, and as much as Steve wishes they had met sooner, he’s never been so glad that Eddie wasn’t part of their group last summer. He wonders what Eddie was up to last summer, briefly imagining him going through the record store at the mall, wearing make-shift shorts and sleeveless shirts showing off his tattoos, playing gigs in dodgy bars and planning day trips to Indianapolis.

“Do I have to fight him for riding shotgun?”  Max whispers as they get closer and Steve snorts.

“Just threaten him with that lawyer of yours.”

It gets the smallest of smiles out of her and Steve has to physically keep himself from wrapping her into another hug.

“I’m riding shotgun,” she declares loudly instead of a hello when they reach the car. Eddie lifts his hands in defeat.

“Wouldn’t dream of stealing it away from you, Red.”

“Good,” she says and walks around the car to the passenger door and gets in, leaving Eddie and Steve alone outside.

“You need to teach your gremlins better manners, Stevie,” Eddie smirks and Max flips him off from inside the car.

“How dare you, she is my proudest achievement,” Steve shoots back pretending to be offended, though he does actually mean it. Of course, he loves all the kids, but Max just became the little sister he never had. It was the fear in her eyes when Billy had shown up back then at the Beyers’ house, that had triggered something in Steve. He too knew what a shitty family was like, with guardians that were either absent or abusive. When his fist connected with Billy’s nose, he had decided that he would do everything he could to make her feel safe and like she belonged.

“Of course, you just had to be good with kids, didn’t you,” Eddie mumbles quietly, more to himself than to Steve. Then his impish grin turns into a softer smile.

“Thanks for picking me up.”

“Sure,” Steve smiles back equally as soft.

Max honks from inside the car, making both of them jump. Robin snickers in the back seat.  

“I think we should go,” Steve says and takes out his keys.

“Yup, good idea,” Eddie agrees and hurries to the back of the car.

The air already smells of BBQ and fireworks smoke when they arrive at the Beyers’ house. Joyce hugs each of them tightly, startling Robin and Eddie a bit, who still have to get used to her affection. Steve allows himself to sink into her arms.

“Glad you made it, sweetie,” she tells him. She looks as if she got just as much sleep as Steve and Robin did.

“Glad to be here,” Steve says and Joyce squeezes him a little harder.

Hopper is standing on the terrace, grilling burgers and hot dogs while the kids have gathered on the lawn playing frisbee with Jonathan and Nancy. Eddie, Robin and Max get instantly roped in too. It would almost look like a normal 4th of July gathering if it wasn’t for El constantly keeping an eye on Hopper as if he might be gone any second again and Lucas hugging Max for a very long time. Joyce too lingers around Hopper, occasionally carrying things in or out of the kitchen. Steve instantly offers to help her, so she can stay outside, chat to Hopper and watch the kids. 

“You don’t have to,” she says as Steve takes a couple of dirty plates out of her hand. 

“Yeah, but I want to,” he stubbornly carries them to the kitchen, not letting Joyce stop him. She has done more than enough for them all, she deserves to have some time off, and spend it with the man she thought for so long she had lost. 

The afternoon passes, the kids play, occasionally emerging from the lawn, covered in grass stains, demanding soda or food. After a while, Nancy and Robin tap out, grabbing a beer from the kitchen and sitting on the sidelines watching. Max too gets a drink and doesn’t join the game. Simply sits down at the terrace and sips her soda. Her left-hand rests on top of her walkman but she doesn’t put it on. Steve grabs a hot dog and walks over. 

“Offer still stands,” he says and sits down next to her. “Say the word and I’ll get the getaway car.”

“I’m good,” she grabs the hot dog and takes a bite. “But thank you.”  

She bumps her knee into his and he bumps his back into hers. Together they watch Jonathan and Eddie chasing the other kids through the garden. Nancy and Robin watch amused from the other side of the garden. Joyce leans against Hopper at the grill.

For a brief moment, everything is alright. For a brief moment, they are normal people, having a BBQ on the 4th of July. Max leans her head on Steve’s shoulder and for a brief moment, Steve truly believes that they are all going to be alright.

Then the fireworks start and nausea floods Steve’s stomach. He can feel the dried blood on his face and Max's face pressed against his chest, her tears soaking his scoops uniform. He can see the defeat and absolute hollowness on Joyce’s face as she has to tell Eleven that Hopper hasn’t made it. He can feel Robin’s shaking hands in his as it slowly sinks in what has happened to them. The memories of the past summer that have haunted his nightmares feel so vivid he might as well experience them right now.

He forces himself to focus on Hopper. He is here, he is alive, he is well, holding both Joyce and Eleven in his arms as they watch the sky light up in an array of colors. Lucas has sat down next to Max and is holding her hand, they too have their eyes peeled to the sky.

Robin walks across the garden and wraps an arm around Steve’s shoulder.

“It’s alright,” she whispers to him quietly. “It’s over. We’ve made it.”

They make it through the fireworks, standing huddled together, holding each other. Everyone is relieved once the last one has been shot into the sky.

“Vickie is gonna pick me up in a few minutes, but I can still cancel,” Robin starts but Steve shakes his head.

“Nope, you are gonna spend tonight with her! I’m gonna be alright.”

“I just don’t want you to be alone tonight.”

“I can stay with him,” Eddie’s voice comes from behind them and they turn around. “If you want me to, that is,” he adds a little bit sheepishly, but Steve just nods. The worried frown on Robin’s face turns into a grin and she raises one eyebrow subtly at Steve. He shoves her shoulder with his. 

“Gotta find out if they ever get that damn ring into Mordor,” he says quietly, but Dustin still hears him somehow from across the lawn.

“Oh my god, are you reading Lord of the Rings?” he pipes up, suddenly next to them.

“He sure is,” Eddie grins and throws his arm around Steve. “Reading Lord of the Rings, playing DnD. You’ve heard it here first folks, Steve Harrington is turning into a full-on nerd.”

“And there goes the last bit of my reputation,” Steve sighs melodramatically, trying not to overthink how close Eddie is standing right now.

“I can’t believe I told you to read it for months and you didn’t,” Dustin shakes his head. “And then Eddie comes around and you just go for it.”

“Well, Eddie was much less of a butthead about it.” And much more persuasive, Steve doesn’t add and instead just ruffles Dustin’s hair. Dustin bats his hand away. 

“Okay, but you owe me answers! Who is your favorite character? Would you rather be a hobbit, dwarf or elf? Have you met Aragorn yet?” Dustin babbles excited and Steve loves him but right now he really doesn’t want to discuss Lord of the Rings.  

“I’ll write you a damn book report, Henderson,” he promises with a sigh. “But some of us work for a living and have to get up early tomorrow.” 

Keith has a solo shift tomorrow morning actually, but Dustin doesn’t know that and so he relents. 

“Three pages minimum.” 

“Fine, can we leave now?” 

“No,” Dustin says and suddenly wraps his arms around Steve. It’s unexpected, Eddie with his general lack of personal space is usually the one who gets most of the kids’ hugs, but not unwelcome. Even though Steve tries to hide it as best as he can, he knows that Dustin can still tell that today is hard for him. “Now you can leave,” Dustin tells Steve once he has let go. Steve ruffles his hair one last time. 

“See you around, Henderson.” Then he waves to the rest of the Party in the garden and leaves together with Eddie and Robin. 

Vickie is already waiting in her car outside and Robin gives both Steve and Eddie a quick hug goodbye, before running over to Vickie. And then it’s just Steve and Eddie, standing outside of Joyce’s house. 

Steve digs his keys out of his pockets and nods towards his car. 

“Come on, your chariot awaits,” he says, regretting it instantly when he sees Eddie’s smirk. “Yes, I know, big word or whatever.” 

“I was actually going to comment on what a horribly nerdy influence I have on you,” Eddie says, amused, as he climbs into the passenger seat. “But big word too.” 

Steve just rolls his eyes and starts the car while Eddies starts to go through the tapes in Steve’s car. By the time they reach Steve’s house he has successfully ranked all of them, Tears for Fears of course coming last. 

They end up in Steve’s kitchen because they always seem to end up in Steve’s kitchen. Eddie is sitting on the kitchen island, letting his legs dangle while Steve puts the leftovers Joyce insisted they should take in the fridge. He glances over at Eddie. He looks good, sitting in Steve’s kitchen. He makes the place feel real and not like a room in a dollhouse kept behind a glass pane. Eddie catches him staring.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

Steve turns back to the fridge. Both of them are smiling. He loves coming home with Eddie. To Eddie.

“What do you wanna do now?” Eddie asks while Steve closes the fridge door, leaving them in the comfortable twilight they find themselves often in lately, with soft shadows and muddy lines that blur into each other. Steve knows exactly what he wants to do.

He navigates the quiet space between them, finding his way to Eddie through the dimly lit kitchen with ease. The hitch of Eddie’s breath when Steve places his hands on Eddie’s thighs is like a siren call. Steve can’t think of a time he wanted something so badly.

He is determined, this time it will happen. No interruptions, no hesitations, he is going to kiss Eddie. He takes one step closer and goes on his tiptoes. Eddie reaches his hand out and cups Steve’s face. Steve closes his eyes and leans forward. Suddenly, a hand is firmly placed on Steve’s chest, keeping him from closing the gap.

“Steve, wait,” Eddie says and gently pushes Steve back down. Confused, Steve opens his eyes and looks at Eddie. There is something bitter-sweet in his face and realization hits Steve.

“Oh,” he says. “I thought—” It clearly doesn’t matter what he thought, he just thought wrong. He tries to step back, but Eddie is still cupping his face, holding him in place.

“No, no, I-I want—,” Eddie swallows. “I want this.” His thumb brushes gently over Steve’s cheek. “I just…I need to know what this is Steve. What I am. To you.”

Everything, Steve thinks. Eddie is the reason Steve feels alive most days now, instead of the hollow emptiness inside his chest that he always feared would consume him one day. Eddie is the smitten smile that Steve no longer wants to hide when Eddie waves his hands over dramatically and drops his voice a couple of octaves just to make the kids laugh during DnD.

Eddie is the calm settling in the pit of Steve’s stomach, his hand gingerly resting on Steve’s arm as they watch everyone, huddled together in Joyce’s backyard, not feeling the weight of everything they went through for one afternoon. Eddie is the feeling of comfort and safety that seeps through Steve’s bones when he talks to Steve at night on the phone, keeping the nightmares at bay. He’s carved himself a space in Steve’s life, the odd piece that shouldn’t fit, but slotted right in. The one Steve never saw coming, but god how he wishes they would have met sooner. He looks at Steve and sees right through the brave face made out of plaster and held together by the pressure Steve puts himself under. He sees Steve and for some reason, it doesn’t make him run. He sees Steve and he chooses to stay.

Eddie is everything.

Eddie is looking at him sheepishly and Steve realizes he hasn’t said anything.

“Like do you just wanna make out for funsies? Fuck around and find out what it’s like to kiss boys?” His thumb stops stroking over Steve’s cheek. If Eddie lets go of his face, Steve worries he might fall apart and shatter. Eddie keeps his hand on Steve’s jaw, but he too looks fragile all of a sudden. His usually bright doe eyes filled with melancholy. “Because as much as I’d want to, I can’t do that with you.”

There are so many things Steve wants to say. Too many things, too intense things. Things he can’t say, at least not all at once, because feeling them is already overwhelming enough. Eddie has tilted Steve’s world by 90 degrees and Steve doesn’t even try to find purchase. He lets himself fall. Surges through the air, oxygen leaving his lungs and adrenaline rushing through his stomach. Catches fire like a comet, plummets through the stratosphere and keeps on falling. Those are the things Eddie makes Steve feel.

He’ll tell Eddie. All of it, bit by bit. He’ll tell him in the early hours of the morning. During long car rides and arguments about horror movies. He’ll tell him while they cook dinner and during the lazy weekends, they get high together. When the sight of cheer squads makes Eddie shake and during nights Steve would rather sleep with his bat in his hands than a pillow. He’ll tell him on birthdays, anniversaries, one second before the clock strikes twelve on New Year's Eve and he’ll tell him on a random Tuesday afternoon.  He’ll tell him for as long as Eddie is willing to listen to him.

“I don’t want to kiss you to find out what it feels like to kiss guys,” Steve manages to finally say. “I mean I do. Want to know what it feels like to kiss guys. But that’s not why I want to kiss you.”

“No?”

“I want to kiss you because I like you, Eddie,” he is whispering now. Eddie gently tilts his face up. They are so close. “You have no idea how much I like you.”

And then Eddie’s lips are pressed against Steve’s. It’s slow and tender, almost chaste. As if they are secretly worried that someone might come and rip them apart yet again. But then nothing happens and Steve melts against Eddie’s lips, deepening the kiss, but keeping the slow pace. He wants to savor this, remember exactly what Eddie’s lips against his feel like, take his time. When Eddie eventually pulls away Steve chases after his lips. Eddie gives him a short peck before resting his forehead against Steve’s. 

“I like you too,” Eddie whispers. “Just in case that wasn’t clear.”

“Like or like like,” Steve can’t help but ask with a giddy grin and Eddie rolls his eyes. Steve is so fucking happy. 

“I swear to god, Harrington,” and Eddie’s hand suddenly in his shirt is all the warning Steve gets before he is pulled into another, more heated kiss. Eddie glides off the table and uses the momentum to push Steve backwards against the fridge. Steve lets out a noise of surprise and feels Eddie grin against his mouth. He uses Steve’s slightly parted lips to take Steve’s bottom lip between his teeth and pulls gently. Steve tries to get as much of Eddie’s hair into his hands as he possibly can but it’s not enough. Steve has wanted this for so long, wanted Eddie for so long that now even though their chests are pressed together so closely that Steve can almost feel  Eddie’s heartbeat, Steve needs them to be closer. As if he could read Steve’s thoughts Eddie kisses him harder and science has been wrong all along. Steve doesn’t need air to breathe, all he needs is Eddie. 

They are both panting when they part. Eddie’s lips are swollen and red, his pupils blown wide. He looks at Steve with both marvel and hunger and Steve feels very much the same. He can’t believe he finally gets to have this.  Before he can go in for another kiss, Eddie very gently places his index finger under Steve’s chin and turns his head to the side. 

“I wanted to kiss you that night, covered in blood,” he says and kisses the corner of Steve’s mouth. “That morning in your bedroom, I thought I was going to die, Steve” he presses his lips against Steve’s jaw. “Wanted to kiss you on the couch,” he whispers into Steve’s ear before placing his mouth behind it. His breath is hot against Steve’s skin and Steve’s legs feel like they are about to give out. “Wanted to fucking bite you during DnD,” demonstratively Eddie lets his teeth graze over Steve’s neck. Steve’s hands tighten Eddie’s hair. “Shotgun you and then slam you against the fridge just like this.” Eddie presses a thigh between Steve’s legs and Steve lets out a gasp that turns into a whine when Eddie’s teeth sink into the slope of his neck. Steve groans and every cohesive thought leaves his head when Eddie seals his lips over Steve’s skin and sucks a love bite against his throat. All there is, is Eddie’s hot lips on his skin, his hands gripping Steve’s hips tightly, their bodies pressed together. It’s too much, and yet not enough. 

“Fuck, Eddie,” Steve moans and can’t help but grind against Eddie’s thigh between his legs. 

“Not yet, sweetheart.” 

Steve almost chokes on air at both the implication and the pet name and he has to swallow another whine. Eddie smirks at him while he circles his bite with his index finger and then lets it glide over Steve’s throat up to his chin. The touch leaves chills all over Steve’s body.

“Could have fooled around in Family Video,” Eddie traces over Steve’s bottom lip with his thumb. “Not sure if you could have kept quiet.”

Eddie is right, Steve probably wouldn’t have. Just the idea of making out with Eddie in the dark corners of the horror section has Steve delirious with want. Fortunately, this want goes both ways and feeling bold, Steve takes Eddie’s thumb into his mouth. It’s Eddie’s turn to gasp before his eyes grow dark and a dangerous expression that sends thrills down Steve’s spine flickers over his face. 

“See, that’s what I mean, you drive me insane,” Eddie drags his thumb over Steve’s bottom lip and pulls it down, his nail gently digging into the flesh. He leans in even closer until their noses are touching. “Like that first night, when I was sure you were going to dare me to kiss you.”

“I wanted to,” Steve admits, trying to lean forward to kiss Eddie again, but Eddie’s hand on his jaw is keeping him from doing it. Eddie gives him a crooked grin, his own lips so close that Steve can feel Eddie’s hot breath ghost over his own, but not close enough to touch.  

“And now?” he asks and ever so slightly leans in. Steve can basically taste Eddie, when he rasps, “Kiss me.”

Eddie obliges and kisses Steve until they are both lightheaded and out of breath. Somehow they manage to get into Steve’s bedroom and out of their clothes. Neither of them lasts very long, driven by the pent-up tension of the last two months that desperately needs to be released. It’s alright, they’ll take their time later when Steve maps Eddie’s scar with his mouth and traces Eddie’s tattoos with his fingers. Eddie will get to count every single one of Steve’s freckles, pressing tiny kisses to them before finally getting to break the skin on Steve’s inner thigh, leaving his own marks. 

Afterwards, they lie in Steve’s bed, snuggled together. Steve with his head resting on Eddie’s chest and Eddie with one arm draped around Steve. 

“I know you said you like me,” Eddie breaks the silence hesitantly after a while, “and I hate asking but you’re not gonna wake up tomorrow, have a sexuality crisis and freak on me are you?” 

Steve props himself up on one elbow and looks at Eddie. He is biting his lip and looking slightly nervous at having asked the question. It breaks Steve’s heart a little bit that something like that probably has happened to Eddie already. 

“No,” he says, nonchalant, and leans up to press a lazy kiss against Eddie’s lips, partially to reassure him, partially because Steve simply wants to and now he can. “Had that one like a month ago, coming to terms with being bi. After you came out to me and I realized there actually might be a chance that you could like me. And then, that I wanted you to like me.”

“I already did back then,” Eddie kisses him back slowly. “Still do.” 

“Thank god or this would be the most awkward pillow talk I ever had.”

“Oh, shut up.” 

“Make me.” 

To Steve’s delight, Eddie grabs his hips, flips him over so that Steve’s back is pressed into the mattress and towers above him. His long hair is falling off his shoulders and tickling Steve’s naked chest. For a moment he is just looking at Steve, taking him all in and Steve can feel the breath catching in the back of his throat. He isn’t used to being looked at like that, with so much affection it almost borders on devotion. Eddie means so much to him and right now he can exactly tell that he means just as much to Eddie. If Eddie continues to look at him like that Steve is afraid he might cry, so he raises an eyebrow and asks, “Well?” 

Eddie shakes his head with an amused smile. “Brat,” he says before bending down and shutting Steve up with a kiss. 

They make out for a while, exchanging slow kisses and talking about everything and nothing in between. It definitely is better in person than on the phone. Slowly, Steve drifts off to sleep, Eddie pleasantly wrapped around him. 

His dreams are less pleasant. They aren’t sit up screaming kind of bad, but at some point, Steve’s eyes fly open and he is unable to move, heart beating in his throat. He stares up at the dark ceiling, trying to calm his fast breathing before he hyperventilates. 

The arm that is loosely slung around him tightens and Steve is pulled closer against Eddie’s chest.

“I’ve got you, baby,” Eddie mumbles and presses a kiss on Steve’s shoulder. “S’ just a dream.”  

Snuggled together like this, Steve can feel Eddie’s chest lift and fall with every breath and he tries to breathe in and out at the same time. Eddie takes his hands, intertwines their fingers and gently presses them against Steve’s chest. 

“Just like that,” he whispers and rests his forehead against the nape of Steve’s neck. “You wanna talk about it?” 

Steve shakes his head. It had just been him and the demodog back in the junkyard, one of the milder nightmares. The kids hadn’t even been in it. 

“Just hold me,” he says and Eddie curls closer around him. He is warm and comfortable and safe. Steve wonders how he is ever supposed to sleep without being held by Eddie again. For a horrible second, he imagines waking up alone.

“Eddie,” he says quietly and turns his head to look at Eddie. The angle is slightly awkward. Eddie hums sleepily before opening his eyes, looking back at Steve. Whatever he sees in Steve’s face makes him squeeze Steve’s hand gently and easier for Steve to ask, “Be here in the morning?” 

Eddie presses another kiss on his shoulder. 

“I’ll stay as long as you want me to.” 

Eddie looks beautiful in the blue light of Steve’s bedroom. The expression on his face is so tender it makes Steve feel absolutely raw in that intense yet soft way emotions only feel at three am. It makes him want to be honest and vulnerable and a little bit cheesy even maybe. 

“That might be a long time,” he says and Eddie smiles at that.  

“I was kinda counting on that.” 

Steve twists his neck even more to give Eddie another kiss. Because he finally can. And knowing that there will be plenty more kisses in the future, Steve slowly falls back asleep. 

The rest of the night remains peaceful. 

Notes:

Well, that sure was long overdue. I can't believe this little idea that I had at 7 am on a random July morning turned into this whole fic, but I am so glad it did. I hope you had as much fun reading as I had writing, thank you for coming on this absolutely insane journey with me. If you enjoyed this fic feel free to leave kudos/comments they always brighten my day <33