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INT. AZIRAPHALE'S BOOKSHOP - DAY
A long table sits in the front of the bookshop in disarray, reminiscent of a war room.
MURIEL is emptying out storage boxes labeled 'PROPERTY OF HEAVEN' on the side, lying their contents out in piles in front of SARAQUEL. She is halfway through a stack of thick scrolls already.
SARAQUEL
You’d think Heaven would notice if there were three dozen filing cabinets that suddenly went missing.
MURIEL
(nervously)
Yes, well. You would think that.
AZIRAPHALE sits idle in a chair at the head of the table. An impressive pile of manila folders and binders is placed in front of him.
It only slightly blocks his line of sight to the front door. Of which he has been intently watching, as though willing it to open with his eyes.
SARAQUEL (O.S.)
Accounting. Only useful to us now for the fact that it never was.
It takes Aziraphale a second to realize Saraquel is talking to him. He pulls a folder at random off the top of the stack, and attempts to find its contents very interesting.
AZIRAPHALE
Quite right.
(then)
Though I've certainly benefited from a miracle or two gone missing over the millennium.
Saraquel concedes with the wave of a hand. Muriel gives him a look, a timid thank you. They all turn back to their respective tasks.
The room returns to a silence of shuffled papers.
Aziraphale's gaze drifts back to the door. Still closed.
Back to the folder. He reads the title. MIRACLES. FILE: ANIMALS. SUBFILE: MARINE MAMMALS. SUBFILE: WHA—
DING-DING.
Aziraphale's head swings in the direction of the front door.
CROWLEY enters.
Hanging up his coat and throwing his glasses onto the table, he gives a deferential nod in the direction of the other angels, before turning his attention to Aziraphale.
CROWLEY
Angel. Back room.
He makes a gesture at the door with a nod of the head. Serious.
Aziraphale's eyes widen with slight alarm. Serious?
Crowley raises an eyebrow. Very.
He crosses the room, holding the door open.
Aziraphale shoots a glance at Saraquel and Muriel, none the wiser as they pour over the stack of scrolls.
He pushes out of his chair, slightly louder than he means to.
AZIRAPHALE
...Just a moment. There's, uh. I need to attend to a——um. In the back.
Muriel stands to attention.
MURIEL
Is it anything I can help with?
But he's already followed Crowley into the room. He calls over his shoulder——
AZIRAPHALE
Shouldn't take more than a moment!
INT. AZIRAPHALE'S BOOKSHOP - BACK ROOM - CONTINUOUS
Aziraphale closes the door behind them.
AZIRAPHALE
Now, what could possibly——
He is abruptly cut off by the press of lips, Crowley's body crowding his against the door with a small thud.
Aziraphale lets himself be kissed, before putting a hand on Crowley's chest to separate the two by a few inches.
AZIRAPHALE (CONT'D)
Now, what could possibly be so serious?
Crowley props himself up with an arm against the door. In the direction of Aziraphale's lips——
CROWLEY
Oh, you know. Just wanted to say hello.
He leans forward again. Aziraphale holds him in place.
AZIRAPHALE
You can't—— Crowley. Please do try to leave the signals for 'oh no, something drastic has happened' for when something well and truly drastic has happened. Or my nerves will never be settled again.
CROWLEY
Mhm. 'Something drastic' could happen right now, is sort of what I was thinking.
AZIRAPHALE
Ah. Yes. I see. You're a... smooth operator, my dear.
(then)
Only we're just a bit busy right now out there, figuring how we ought to save the world from the Second Coming. You remember.
Crowley is unperturbed. He is of a one track mind with one particular goal in mind.
CROWLEY
That old thing?
AZIRAPHALE
So you'll have to forgive me if I have to insist you don't try to scare me half to death the next time you'd like to get me alone?
He's chastising. But the words "get me alone" - new, charged with meaning - are like a bolt of electricity between the two all the same.
CROWLEY
I don't know. You seemed like the one who needed a bit of saving out there.
AZIRAPHALE
Oh, really?
CROWLEY
Papers. Files. Boring, isn't it?
A turn from feigned annoyance to real——
AZIRAPHALE
It would go entirely quicker if you would help us.
CROWLEY
Bleugh. No. You save the world, I save you. I'm doing my part.
AZIRAPHALE
You do love to save me.
CROWLEY
(I do)
Smooth operator.
Aziraphale feels himself being worn down.
AZIRAPHALE
There's truly nothing the matter, then?
CROWLEY
Angel. No.
Aziraphale's expression of stern indifference slides away into a small smile.
CROWLEY (CONT'D)
Not beyond the things we already know about, anyway——
Aziraphale uses the hand against Crowley's chest to gently pull him forward into another kiss. Soft, chaste. Hello.
Crowley's arm against the door falters. As does the rest of his body.
He loses his footing, the kiss interrupted as he falls sideways. He makes an attempt to catch himself, only——
SMACK. The side of his head collides against the door.
He rubs at the sore spot.
CROWLEY (CONT'D)
Ouch.
Aziraphale tries his best not to laugh openly.
On the other side of the door, they hear footsteps growing closer.
MURIEL (O.S.)
Is everything alright?
AZIRAPHALE
Oh, yes. It's all running very smoothly in here.
Crowley mouths smoothly, mockingly.
INT. AZIRAPHALE'S BOOKSHOP - LATER
There's another THUD against the back door.
Before Muriel can walk over there again, Saraquel holds out a hand to stop them.
SARAQUEL
Best not.
(then, elaborating)
They're a bit much, really.
Muriel looks in the direction of the door, confused. It didn't sound like things were going smoothly to them. But they stay back all the same.