Chapter Text
The night out with Ella was a turning point in the rekindling of their bond. Jennie had forgotten what it felt to have a younger sibling, particularly now that her little sister was no longer a child. The type of conversations they had changed, and Jennie couldn’t believe how easy it was to open up to Ella. Regardless of Jennie’s tumultuous past, it felt nice to have part of her family back into her life, especially when Ella was finally reciprocating the effort in letting Jennie back into hers.
And to think, it was yet another change that indirectly started with Lisa.
Ella had been nosy and asked her about her mystery photographer. Jennie needed more than one evening to tell her about Lisa, so she simply used it as an excuse to see her sister again. She also made Ella promise that she would answer her texts and calls, which was all that Jennie really needed for them to work things out. Not wanting to have awkward encounters with her parents, they parted ways just outside of Ella’s neighbourhood, but Jennie refused to move until she saw Ella enter the gates of her house.
Later in the evening, as she walked up the stairs of Chaeyoung’s building with a heavy bag in her hand, Jennie started to feel a little nervous about her impulsive purchase. She had not really planned to buy two cameras, but she had the money and the intention of getting Lisa what she needed to get back into photography, so the decision was made very quickly. Her only hope was that Lisa would accept it without reading too much into it.
After all, there wasn’t anything to read into.
When she stepped foot on the third floor, the distant, steady sound of glass tapping against the ground made Jennie come to a halt. She only had to make a right turn to reach the door of the apartment, but that was exactly where the noise was coming from. She held the bag with the camera box a little tighter in her hand.
Then, the tapping stopped, followed by one long sigh. With two cautious steps, Jennie poked her head out until she could get a glimpse of the door at the end of the faintly lit corridor. There, slumped on the floor with an almost empty bottle of soju, she saw a very defeated-looking Kim Jisoo.
Jennie furrowed her eyebrows and walked up to the other girl, her confusion evident. Jisoo’s eyes focused on Jennie’s shoes as she came closer, eventually travelling up her body until she could look at her face, glassy-eyed.
“What are you doing?”
Jisoo pursed her lips. She then started tapping the glass bottle against the floor again, making no attempt to stand up or move away from the door.
“She’s not answering me,” Jisoo said in almost a whine.
“Who?”
Jisoo chuckled at the question. “Who d’you think?”
Taking a quick glance around, Jennie became wary of the vicinity of her neighbours. The nearby doors could open at any moment to express a complaint. She looked back down at Jisoo as she reached into her purse to grab her keys. “You can’t stay here.”
“Why isn’t she answering?”
“I don’t know,” Jennie deadpanned, turning the key in the lock and pushing the door open. “You didn’t specify who, remember?”
Jisoo didn’t move an inch from her position. She still sat on the floor with her back to the apartment, now only partially supported by the doorframe.
“She said we can talk,” Jisoo said. “She told me that, but now she doesn’t answer. What else am I supposed to do?”
“Get up.”
“And I try, and I try, and I try, and I still get fucking nothing!”
“And you will continue to get fucking nothing if you don’t get up,” Jennie said with a tight-lipped smile. She squeezed past Jisoo and finally stepped inside, leaving her shopping on a table near the entrance. Then, she gave Jisoo an expectant look, a hand patiently resting on the door handle. “Now, you either come in, or go back home.”
Jisoo threw a dubious glance in her way. Eventually, with a heavy sigh, she pushed herself up with the help of the wall, missing a step when she tried to make a full turn. Jennie reached out to grab her arm, guiding the wobbly girl inside and shutting the door behind them.
Chaeyoung mentioned that she had spoken to Jisoo recently. Well, Jennie didn’t get all the details, but she knew that Jisoo’s number was outside her friend’s blocked list. She assumed Chaeyoung knew what she was doing, but the most likely drunk girl that she had to drag into their living room was suggesting otherwise.
As she lowered Jisoo’s body on the sofa, Jennie took extra care in removing the bottle of soju from the girl’s hand before she could spill the contents on Chaeyoung’s carpet. She then proceeded to grab her shopping bag again and head to her room, opting to change into her pyjamas and leave Jisoo to rest for a while.
Given that she bought the camera on impulse, Jennie didn’t exactly know when it would be appropriate to give it to Lisa. She presumed that it wouldn’t be any time soon since the confession episode was still fresh on both of their minds. Considering this, Jennie simply placed it on a shelf inside her wardrobe, leaving it inside the plastic bag to keep the outer box clean, as well as to hide it from prying eyes.
Jennie had barely pulled up her pyjama’s trousers when the sound of footsteps reached her ears. She huffed in annoyance and rolled her eyes, grabbing her shirt and putting it on rather aggressively. Even without checking, Jennie knew exactly who was wandering around.
The sofa was unsurprisingly empty when Jennie exited her room. Looking around, she spotted Chaeyoung’s bedroom door wide open when it had been closed moments prior.
“Kim Jisoo,” she called as she approached the room with her phone in hand. “You can’t just walk into her bedroom like that.”
No answer followed.
Jennie knew she had no chance of getting the girl to leave.
Jisoo had dropped herself in the middle of Chaeyoung’s bed, both of her arms wrapped tightly around the pillow she was resting her head on. Chaeyoung’s pillow. Although her eyes were shut, Jennie could tell she wasn’t fully asleep.
With her patience running low, Jennie sighed in defeat. There really was no point in finding other ways to deal with her unplanned guest besides the very obvious solution.
Unlocking her phone, Jennie pulled up Chaeyoung’s contact and pressed the video call button. The time difference was of a mere hour, so her best friend was certainly awake. She received confirmation of that when Chaeyoung picked up the call in the comfort of her childhood home bedroom.
“Hey wifey, how’s it going? Everything good with Lisa?” was the first thing she said with a playful grin.
Jennie laughed and stepped inside Chaeyoung’s current bedroom. “You’ll have to wait to hear about that. There’s something else you should see, actually.”
“Yeah? What’s up?” Chaeyoung questioned with a curious glint in her eyes.
Standing right next to the bed, Jennie turned her back to Jisoo, lowering herself until the front camera of her phone had a clear view of who was behind. She could see the exact moment Chaeyoung noticed Jisoo on her bed, her eyes growing wide and a hand coming up to cover her mouth, stifling a surprised gasp.
Jennie raised her hand until it looked like she was holding up Jisoo’s head from the camera angle. “Ta-da!”
“No fucking way.”
“Your lover girl is a bit of a pain in the ass, you know? I’m like, ninety percent sure she is drunk.”
“Drunk?” Chaeyoung repeated in disbelief. “Jisoo drinks like—once a year.”
“Yeah, well,” Jennie glanced back to see Jisoo’s eyes opening slightly. “You might want to tell her why you’re not picking up the phone. I doubt she’s gonna leave your house otherwise.”
Chaeyoung’s eyes softened immediately when Jisoo greeted her with a sleepy smile. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
“You look… really pretty.”
“Thank you.” Chaeyoung smiled genuinely. “You look like shit, Chu.”
And for the first time, Jennie heard Kim Jisoo giggle.
Still holding the phone, Jennie patiently waited for Jisoo to continue the conversation, yet only silence ensued. In her drowsy and blank-minded state, Jisoo completely ignored Jennie’s existence. Anything Jisoo was desperate to say had suddenly gone out the window as soon as she laid eyes on the screen.
Chaeyoung had the patience of a saint and spoke to her drunk ex-girlfriend like she was a child getting ready for bed.
Clearly, Jennie was very much out of place. She would have loved to walk out and leave the ex-lovers to their late-night flirting, but she couldn’t leave her phone behind.
Not when she spotted a very familiar name flashing at the top of the screen in the middle of the call.
Jisoo was not really responding, her eyes half closed with a silly smile on her lips as she listened to Chaeyoung talk. Jennie was certain she caught her friend taking a screenshot of the video call at some point.
After the few minutes it took for Jisoo to fall asleep completely, Chaeyoung ensured to tell Jennie it was completely fine for her ex-girlfriend to sleep on her bed.
(She also kindly reminded her to remain civil during her absence.)
“Are you rejecting her calls?” Jennie eventually asked when she left the room.
“Nope,” Chaeyoung sighed. “She’s been calling me on the Korean number. The one I won’t be able to answer until I’m back.”
Right. Jennie recalled her friend forgetting her Korean SIM card at home the day she had to leave. No wonder Jisoo thought she was being ignored.
“You’re gone for a few days and her world falls apart, huh? Good thing she didn’t break down the front door.”
“It’s nice to know she was thinking of me, at least.”
“Do you want me to leave the phone in your room so you can watch her sleep?”
“Oh, shut up!”
After Chaeyoung recovered from her laughing fit, Jennie wished her goodnight, reminding her to call before boarding her plane the next day.
Jennie didn’t mean to be in such a rush to hang up, but the notification icon on the top of her screen had been screaming for her attention since it first appeared.
Instagram: lalalalisa_m started following you.
Jennie had the urge to click it as soon as it showed up on screen, but she had to let the call end before she could check it out.
When she saw that Lisa’s profile was private, she could only let out a small groan. Jennie was impatient. Only Lisa’s profile picture was visible, a black and white photo showing her side profile with her eyes almost entirely covered by her cap.
The follow request was sent right away.
Lisa had explicitly told her she did not have an Instagram account. Jennie insisted that she should make one given her talent in taking pictures, but Lisa had never seemed interested. And when the request was accepted in a matter of minutes, Jennie realised why Lisa had wanted to keep it a secret.
There were not many pictures posted; Jennie easily scrolled to the bottom with one swipe. The first few pictures must have been taken during high school. Jennie recognised the uniform immediately, which was probably what Lisa had feared when her account was brought up. Just like Lisa had mentioned before, her hair was dyed a very bright blonde. She totally looked like a K-pop idol, Jennie couldn’t deny it.
Then, another notification appeared on top of her screen.
lalalalisa_m:
I guess I should explain
jennierubyjane:
you said you weren’t hiding anything else
you promised!
lalalalisa_m:
I forgot!
both to tell you and also my password
jennierubyjane:
so you never looked through my account?
lalalalisa_m:
well I didn’t say that
jennierubyjane:
so you did
lalalalisa_m:
well yeah
only recently
your profile is public
jisoo follows chaeyoung and chaeyoung follows you
The smile on Jennie’s lips came so naturally. Lisa was starting to ramble in an attempt to explain her curiosity. Jennie couldn’t blame her; she would have done the same thing if the roles were reversed.
jennierubyjane:
it’s fine lisa
it’s kinda cute actually
The continuous appearance and disappearance of lalalalisa_m is typing… made Jennie squeal and laugh under her breath. She had a feeling that the girl was flustered behind the screen.
It was surprising how effortless it felt to be so playful after what happened. Jennie was sure that if it had been anyone else, there would have been some awkwardness. She recognised what the feeling was, there was no arguing that there was something there. All that was left was to ensure Lisa felt the same.
Besides, if Lisa used to have a crush on her in the past, there was a slight chance that she could have it once more.
lalalalisa_m:
can I call you?
Jennie didn’t have to read the message twice to dial Lisa’s number. In hindsight, she could have waited at least a few minutes to avoid seeming as desperate as she actually felt to hear Lisa’s voice.
“Hey.”
Lisa’s nervous sigh made a smile appear on Jennie’s lips almost instantly.
“Hey,” she responded.
“Hey,” Lisa laughed and repeated the greeting once again.
“Why did you call?”
“Technically, you did.”
Jennie couldn’t stop a subtle eye roll. “You asked.”
“Yeah. I did. I just wanted to… talk?”
“About?”
“I don’t know. I just thought that after this morning, I ought to check that everything’s okay. With, you know, us.”
“There’s an us?”
Lisa let out an exasperated breath. “Jennie.”
“Everything’s great,” she mused, twirling a lock of her hair around her index like she was fifteen again. “Perfect, even.”
And she didn’t know if it was the way Lisa started to lose the tension in her voice or the sudden blank state of mind that she found herself after her eventful evening, but Jennie just didn’t want to hang up.
Like Lisa mentioned before, Jennie asked her how her day was. Partly because Lisa liked to be asked, and party because Jennie felt like asking. Enthralled by Lisa’s voice, she paid attention to every word that came out of Lisa’s mouth. Hearing her talk felt so therapeutic after a long day.
And maybe Jennie started to feel a sudden moment of bravery in the hours after midnight, but when Lisa started to mumble her words out of sleepiness, Jennie had one last thing to say.
“Lisa.”
“Hmm?”
“I want to see you.”
She could sense the surprise in Lisa’s quiet, “Oh.”
A few seconds of silence later, Lisa hummed once again. “Me too.”
“When?”
“Tomorrow? I finish work early.”
The immediate yes was on the tip of Jennie’s tongue, but all that came out was a tired groan. “I can’t. Have to pack my things for the move.”
And Jennie really couldn’t have chosen a better day to do that.
“That’s okay. We can meet when you’re free.”
“No, no, I…” Jennie ran a hand through her hair in frustration. “Come over? After you’re done.”
“I could do that.”
“Okay.”
“Okay. See you tomorrow, Jennie.”
It had been years since Jennie felt so giddy while falling asleep.
----
Out of all the things Jennie looked forward to the following day, waking up under the same roof as Kim Jisoo wasn’t exactly on her list. And yet, as she fried two eggs on a pan, she didn’t feel the same resentment as she had months prior. Mostly, Chaeyoung’s big smile the night before made her realise just how much her friend loved that obnoxious woman.
Just as she pulled out two mugs from the cupboard, an awkward clearing of throat reached her ears. Turning around with an unbothered expression, Jennie eyed the clean appearance of the girl opposite her. Jisoo was not wearing the same clothes as yesterday, and her hair was slightly damp. Jennie could only assume she was familiar with Chaeyoung’s house enough to use her shower and clothes.
“Good morning,” she said hesitantly.
“Morning,” Jennie responded, placing the two mugs on the table and reaching for the coffee pot behind her. “Coffee?”
Jisoo looked around awkwardly and pulled at the hem of her (well, Chaeyoung’s) shirt. “I think it’s better if I get going.”
Yet somehow, Jisoo’s eyes were fixed on the dark liquid. The smell of fresh coffee in the morning was probably defeating her plan of escape.
Jennie couldn’t help but roll her eyes as she started pouring the hot drink. “I don’t bite. Sit down.”
Clearly, Jisoo was too hungover to argue. “Do you always wake up this early in the morning?”
“I should be asking you that.” Jennie placed a plate with buttered toast and a fried egg in front of her not-so-wanted guest. “Do you wake up at 6 a.m. after a night of drinking?”
Jisoo shrugged. “Yeah, somehow.”
A moment of awkward silence ensued.
Jennie tapped her fingers on the kitchen table repeatedly as she waited for the other girl to make any attempt at eye contact. Jisoo was too busy moving her egg around with a fork to notice.
“I don’t get it.”
Jisoo glanced up, startled. “Huh?”
“Your breakup. I don’t get it.”
“Just like you don’t get your own breakup?”
Touché.
“Fair enough. But Taeyang and I don’t have feelings for each other anymore,” Jennie pointed out as she sipped her coffee. It tasted more bitter than usual, which she wanted to blame on Jisoo’s presence. “Can you say the same for yourself?”
Jisoo pressed her lips together and pushed away her plate, opting to lean back on her chair and grab her own mug.
“No,” she said. “I love Chaeyoung. More than you think.”
“Then why did you say you weren’t gonna last?”
Jisoo narrowed her eyes slightly. If it had not been so early in the morning, Jennie was certain she would have received worse reactions. “Did she tell you that?”
“Yes. That’s what friends usually do,” Jennie replied with a hint of sarcasm. “But I guess you don’t really know that since you’ve been keeping Chaeyoung like a dirty little secret.”
“I have not done that,” Jisoo rebutted, now sitting up straighter with clear annoyance in her eyes.
“Lisa would have never even met her if it wasn’t for me.”
“That’s because—”
“Because you thought it wasn’t gonna last, I get that.” Jennie interrupted. “It’s just all very stupid to me. Chaeyoung has never done or said anything to make you think that.”
“I know, I know…” Jisoo ran a hand through her hair exasperated. “It’s just… It was too good to be true.”
“Are you being serious?”
“I’m almost thirty, okay? And I—”
“I can tell,” Jennie commented bluntly.
Jisoo glared at her, before continuing. “And I dedicated the last decade of my life entirely to my career. Every partner I’ve had got fed up and left because of it, so when Chaeyoung didn’t, I convinced myself it was only a matter of time before she, too, would get tired. When she broke up with me, I told myself it was expected. Over and over.”
“So, you just ruined something good for the sake of being right?” Jennie deadpanned at last.
“No. I ruined something good because I’m simply a dumbass,” Jisoo shrugged, returning to her drink with a disheartened look.
Jennie’s lips formed a slight smile. “At least you’re self-aware.”
“Thanks.”
Every complaint that Chaeyoung had about her relationship with Jisoo aligned with the girl’s reluctant explanation. Jennie understood that Jisoo’s issues with previous partners likely influenced her attitude, but ultimately, there was only one person who deserved to hear the full story.
Lack of communication was what got the couple to their current state. If Jisoo were to be completely honest with her, Chaeyoung would finally get the result she had hoped for.
And if Jennie knew her best friend well, she predicted that it wouldn’t be the end of the road for the two.
“What’s your plan?”
Now more comfortable and awake, Jisoo grabbed a slice of toast and took a generous bite. “Plan for what?”
“Winning Chaeyoung back. What are you gonna do next?”
Jisoo swallowed her food and chuckled under her breath as she rubbed crumbs off her hands. “We’re barely talking again. Nothing’s happening.”
“You’re a lost cause.”
“Fuck you.”
“I’m trying to help.”
“She’s not even in the country.”
Jennie crossed her arms and leaned on the table. “She’s back tomorrow.”
“When?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” she smirked teasingly, watching Jisoo try to act like the newfound information didn’t interest her.
“Yes, actually.” Jisoo cleared her throat. “Please.”
“I told her I’d pick her up from the airport.
“Well, when she’s back I’ll ask her to—”
“No, listen to me,” Jennie said firmly. “She’s expecting me to pick her up from the airport.”
“Okay?”
Jennie sighed heavily. She really had to spell it out.
“She’s expecting someone at the airport. That someone is not gonna be me.”
“You mean I can…?”
“Yes. That’s exactly what I mean.”
Uncertainty flashed across Jisoo’s features. But when she looked into her eyes, all Jennie saw was determination. “Okay. I’ll pick her up.”
“Lovely. My job is done here.”
As soon as the words left her mouth, Jennie stood up and collected her dirty dishes. Considering she still had work and a special someone to see later in the evening, she expected a long day ahead of her. Behind her, Jisoo remained in her seat as she finished eating.
“I’m gonna be leaving in about ten minutes. Feel free to stay as long as you need.”
“That’s weirdly kind of you.”
“That’s because Chaeyoung said so, and it’s her house,” Jennie said as she wiped her hands with a towel. “If it was up to me, you would have been out hours ago.”
“Good thing I’m not dating you.”
“You’re not dating Chaeyoung, either.”
“Again, fuck you.”
As Jennie walked out the kitchen, Jisoo turned and called out to her.
“What time is her plane landing?”
Jennie didn’t even try to hide her mischievous grin. “At 4 a.m.”
----
Packing sucked.
Having to gather all her things in limited boxes right after a day of work was not enough to test her patience. It turned out that Jennie also had no clue about how to fit things in boxes.
“Stupid fucking plates,” she gritted out as she played Tetris with her old plates and cups that had not been touched since she picked them up from her previous place. She had not even glanced at the cutlery yet.
The living room was a complete and utter mess. Jennie opted for a mix of cardboard boxes and plastic containers, which were now all scattered across the floor, coffee table, and sofa.
When she had picked up her belongings from Taeyang’s place, Jennie had been too annoyed to think about organising anything. She thought shoving everything in the boot of Yeri’s car would have been enough. Chaeyoung had made space for some of the items in her small storage room, while Yeri offered to keep the rest temporarily in her house.
Her cousin had conveniently dropped off everything at Chaeyoung’s place that afternoon to make it easier for the moving company to collect everything and deliver it to the new address.
Jennie didn’t have a lot of stuff, but she certainly had enough to make her struggle. Her clothes were yet to be folded and placed neatly in her suitcases. Her work materials were still in her room. But the random junk that she had carried over from her old home was still lying around. Jennie had been very petty and taken anything she paid for with her own money. That included random books, CDs and vinyl, kitchen utensils, and of course, a printer (again, she paid for it).
In hindsight, sorting her stuff in containers ahead of time would have made her life so much easier.
Jennie’s hair was falling out of what used to be a neat bun, her knees hurt like a bitch after being on the floor for the past hour, and her outfit wasn’t the comfiest considering she had not changed out of her work blouse and trousers. Yeri just had to drop off her belongings right as she was back from work.
And yet, when the doorbell rang, all of her concerns vanished, and she was up on her feet in a matter of seconds.
While she was aware her appearance couldn’t be saved at that moment, Jennie still paused before the door to make sure her shirt was neatly tucked into her trousers, pushing loose strands of hair behind her ear and fixing her collar. Putting on her best smile, she pulled the door open.
It shouldn’t have been a surprise that Lisa looked so good. Jennie couldn’t help giving a quick look-over. Lisa had been waiting with her hands in the pockets of her oversized jacket, a grey hoodie underneath. A cap was on her head like usual, but Jennie met her eyes easily.
“Hello,” she greeted, hoping her voice sounded steady.
Lisa smiled timidly. “Hey. You look…”
“Like a mess?” Jennie laughed as she stepped aside, motioning for Lisa to come in.
“No, just… good.”
Jennie turned around before Lisa could see her blush, walking back to the living room with Lisa on her tail. “Thanks. So do you.”
Somehow, Jennie’s game was completely gone. She had no clue where the daring, confident girl from when she first started dating Taeyang went. It reminded her of the date with Sooyoung, where she was hyperaware of everything and clearly very weak around pretty girls.
“Do you have to pack everything today?” Lisa questioned as she took a glance around what used to be a clean living room. Jennie lifted a box from the sofa and stacked it on an empty one on the floor, making space for her guest.
“Ideally. The truck is coming to pick up everything in two days, but Chaeyoung is back tomorrow, and I’d rather not bother her by leaving it to the last minute.”
“How long have you been at it?” Lisa questioned, looking down at Jennie’s formal attire.
Jennie let out a tired sigh. “About an hour now. I got the stuff and the boxes. Just not… together.”
She then reached up to her bun and removed the claw clip holding it together, letting her hair fall down her shoulders. If Jennie had glanced up, she would have noticed Lisa’s eyes following the motion intently.
“It’s probably better to get into comfy clothes. Do you want anything to eat?”
Lisa pressed her lips together and shook her head, looking anywhere but at Jennie’s eyes. “No, uh, maybe later?”
“Sure. Sit down and make yourself at home, I’ll be right back.”
As soon as she was in her room, Jennie closed the door behind her and leaned her back on it. She took a deep breath to calm down, noticing her heart beating a little faster and her fingers trembling slightly. She hoped Lisa didn’t detect how nervous she truly felt. She didn’t want her to think anything had changed.
“Everything is fine,” Jennie whispered to herself as she started to unbutton her blouse. “Everything will be completely fine.”
Everything was NOT fine.
After changing into a more comfortable sweatshirt and leggings, Jennie felt like she had the time to compose herself. Behaving like she normally did should not have been a problem. But when she opened her door and saw Lisa on the floor arranging her plates neatly in a stack, every word of self-assurance left her mind.
Lisa had taken off her cap and jacket, but also got rid of her hoodie, revealing the sleeveless black shirt underneath. Jennie tried SO hard not to stare at how attractive the girl looked doing absolutely anything, but it turned out to be incredibly difficult.
“You don’t have to do that.”
Lisa merely shook her head with a small smile. “It’s no problem. Two people work faster than one, right?”
Jennie laughed as she sat herself on the carpet. “Yeah, except I didn’t get anywhere.”
“Hey. At least you have plenty of boxes and bubble wrap.”
To Jennie’s surprise, Lisa was actually extremely efficient in organising her stuff. The random clusters of items around the room were slowly decreasing, until all that was left were lined up boxes against the wall.
Jennie liked to think she helped, but sometimes she found herself too busy admiring Lisa’s arm muscles as she lifted stuff around. They could have easily lifted her, Jennie thought.
By the time they were done, Lisa had dropped herself on the carpet with her back against the sofa, stretching her legs out.
Jennie went to grab a bottle of water from the fridge, returning and holding it out for the seated girl.
“Thanks,” Lisa said a little out of breath.
“I feel like I should be paying you.”
Lisa took a swig of water before shaking her head repeatedly, “Not at all. It was kind of fun.”
Jennie just HAD to notice the drop of water that missed Lisa’s mouth and ran down her neck.
“Fun?” she finally replied.
Lisa shrugged, putting the cap back on the bottle. “I don’t mind it if it’s you.”
And there she went again, making Jennie feel like she was more special than it seemed. Lisa couldn’t possibly be flirting, but Jennie’s cheek started to warm up regardless.
“Only me?” she questioned slowly.
Jennie watched as Lisa started to panic, her eyes growing a little wide.
“I mean—yeah, like, I don’t mind helping you. I like helping. Anyone. But also, you. Especially you.”
“Especially me?”
Lisa let out the most defeated groan as she dropped her head back in shame. “I was trying so hard not to make it weird.”
Jennie laughed quietly. “Weird how?”
“Oh, you know,” Lisa gestured between them. “Pretending that you didn’t find out I had the biggest crush on you in high school.”
“No one said anything about it being big,” Jennie pointed out.
“I don’t give letters out to small crushes.”
“I suppose you have a point.”
Jennie climbed on the sofa and sat herself comfortably as Lisa remained on the floor.
“Does it really not bother you?” Lisa turned to face Jennie’s new position, lifting her arm to rest it alongside the sofa’s edge.
Her hand was just within reach, Jennie observed. And yet, she curled up her fingers and held her own hand firmly by her side to avoid following her impulses.
“Not in the slightest,” Jennie shook her head with a smile. “It’s been eight years, Lisa. Way past the statute of limitations on love confessions, I believe.”
“Right,” Lisa said as she averted her gaze. “It was a dumb confession either way.”
“Why do you say that?” Jennie questioned as she reached to her side, going unnoticed by Lisa who still kept her eyes on anything but Jennie.
“Oh, I don’t even remember.” Lisa laughed nervously. “I’m sure it’s just gonna remain a distant memory now.”
“Dear Jennie Kim,” Jennie started reading out loud, “if you’re reading this letter, it means that I finally got the courage to speak to you.”
Lisa’s head whipped around at the familiar words, eyes growing wide in shock as she spotted the yellow envelope that Jennie held between her fingers. Jennie had very subtly pulled it out of the nightstand beside the sofa as Lisa spoke, not resisting the urge to bring it up.
“That, or I was too much of a coward and left it on—”
Not wasting a single second, Lisa jumped up and desperately reached for the embarrassing piece of paper. Unfortunately for her, Jennie was quicker, moving the letter out of reach as she pushed against Lisa’s shoulder with her free hand.
“There’s no fucking way you still have that,” Lisa blurted out.
Jennie was pretty sure she could not stop smiling even if she tried. Fixing her eyes back on the paper, she quickly read a couple more lines while she could. “From the moment I first laid eyes on you, I have not been able to stop thinking about you.”
“PLEASE,” Lisa almost yelled in a high-pitched voice, finally able to grasp the corner of the yellow envelope.
Always one step ahead, Jennie took the chance to free herself and leave the sofa, safely taking the letter with her while abandoning the empty envelope in Lisa’s hands. “Sometimes I stay at the front gate and wait for your dad’s car to come by and drop you off—”
Jennie ran to the other side of the living room as Lisa chased after her. “—just so I can start my day by seeing how beautiful you are.”
By the time she finished the sentence, Jennie had made an entire lap around the living room. Her cheeks hurt from how wide her grin was.
Reaching the sofa again, she climbed back up on it, this time standing as high as her legs allowed her to. Lisa was immediately after her, holding her by the waist with one arm while the other was stretched straight above.
Knowing her time was limited, Jennie skipped to the last paragraph.
“You have become the reason my heart feels happier these days. I know you have everyone’s eyes on you—”
Jennie shrieked as Lisa pulled her whole body down, making them both fall onto the carpet out of breath. Lisa had immobilised every part of her, trapping her waist between her legs. In that position, it was fairly easy to snatch the letter out of her hands.
But it didn’t really matter, because Jennie had read the words over and over the past night. So much that they seemed imprinted in her mind.
Lisa looked down at her with flushed cheeks and sheepish eyes. Jennie probably didn’t look any better with sweat making her hair stick to her forehead.
“And I’m just one of many others,” she continued to recite between breaths, “but I can’t live—”
“—with the regret of never telling you how much I like you.” Lisa finished off, much to Jennie’s surprise.
“And you said you didn’t remember, huh?”
Lisa couldn’t resist mirroring Jennie’s bright smile. “It’s hard to forget something you spent multiple nights pouring your heart out on.”
“I give it a ten out of ten.”
“Why do you still have it?”
“I don’t really have an answer for that.” Jennie sighed. “I’m just glad I do.”
“So that you can tease me until my dying breath?”
“So that I can imagine what it feels like to receive a love confession from you.”
Lisa finally moved away from Jennie’s body, dropping beside her to lay on her back as well. “You felt that eight years ago.”
“Turns out I didn’t,” Jennie pressed her lips together, slightly ashamed to admit it. “The letter was still sealed when I found it.”
“Well, maybe it was better that way.”
A strange silence hung in the air. Jennie thought it was the right time to move on completely before the situation got too uncomfortable, but Lisa soon continued.
“I was just wondering, you know, if you had read it.” Jennie turned her head at the hopeful tone, but Lisa refused to make eye contact. “If, hypothetically, you were open about liking girls even in high school, would you have considered it then?”
“Probably not,” Jennie replied immediately.
“Right,” Lisa laughed nervously, “of course, I mean, I was just wondering. That’s all. Of course not.”
“I was months away from graduating,” Jennie explained calmly. “I was never going to start a relationship at that time. Besides, if I were to date any girl during high school, I would have picked Park Jihyo.”
Lisa paused, trying to remember. “The student council president?”
“She was totally my type.”
Lisa rolled her eyes and elbowed Jennie’s arm gently as the other girl started laughing. “Yeah, yeah. Didn’t she get the top athlete suspended for drinking or something?”
“Yes, my ex-boyfriend. And it was for smoking on the rooftop after school.”
“You found that attractive?”
“I found bad boys attractive, and I found Jihyo telling off bad boys attractive.”
“Huh,” Lisa mused, still looking up at the ceiling. “I knew my chances were close to zero, but this just confirms it.”
Jennie turned her body towards Lisa, propped up on her elbow and resting the side of her head on her hand. Her eyes scanned Lisa’s soft features, attempting to decipher if her statement was made out of disappointment.
“What was your type?”
“You,” Lisa responded almost too quickly. She shut her eyes and brought her hands up to her face in embarrassment soon after.
Jennie felt a little evil with her moderately loud snort. “Thanks. I figured.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.” Lisa mumbled, moving her hands back to her stomach. “I just, well, I only really liked you in high school. I didn’t really look at anyone else, so… I guess that made you my type.”
The longer she looked at her, the harder Jennie found it to not lean over and just press her lips to that pretty little mouth. Listening to Lisa talk always brought out an unconscious smile from her.
“Are you not gonna ask me?”
Lisa finally dared to glance towards Jennie’s kind gaze. “What?”
“What my type is now?”
“Gym guys with a model’s face?”
Jennie winced. “Yeah, right. That didn’t work for me.”
“So, what does?”
“Having a type is pretty limiting, don’t you think?”
Lisa rolled her eyes playfully. “You’re the one that asked.”
“You were dying to know.”
“I was not!” Lisa said in protest. “And you’re the one going on dates. You should have an idea of what to look for.”
“I simply don’t anymore. I figured that once someone’s right for me, I’ll just feel it.”
“What if no one makes you feel like that?”
Jennie smiled. “I’m sure someone will.”
Someone already has.
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