Chapter Text
Etho had a secret.
A secret he has managed to keep hidden for years. A secret greater than any of his other secrets, one so significant that he’s had to take preventative measures in order to ensure no one would ever find out.
Etho…had a crush.
A big, intense, massive crush.
On a certain mischievous, red-sweater-wearing builder.
Yes.
Etho had a crush on Grian.
It took him a while to accept this fact. Up until two years ago, he still considered Grian to simply be a good friend.
But… looking back on everything, he was definitely in denial.
The thing is, Etho couldn’t exactly describe when he first took an interest in the builder. If he were to pinpoint it to one event..it would have to be their unofficial first meeting in the sixth world.
He had been restocking his shop when a flash of red caught his eye. Grian was walking around the shopping district. They were strangers at the time, Etho having only seen him once during the beginning of this world.
The builder perked up when he noticed him, staring back with a curious look.
The redstoner, in a playful mood, crouched down and started backing away slowly - not looking away from him once. Grian had blinked at that, before his eyes filled with a mirth that had Etho feeling warm inside.
The builder giggled as Etho hid behind a nearby ice structure, and full-on laughed when he peeked out suddenly.
Grian, much to his amusement, crouched down and crept towards the ice structure. Just as he rounded the corner, the smile on his face turned to confusion when he noticed Etho was no longer there.
Having surreptitiously thrown a ender pearl a few moments prior, he snuck behind him and tapped him on the shoulder. The builder let out a shrill shriek.
Etho laughed quietly. The builder turned around appearing slightly miffed. “You-”
“Me.” He smiled. Grian rolled his eyes, a small smile on his face.
That was the incident that sparked their friendship. A few weeks after that, Grian would ask him for help with his gold farm. As the two worked together on the project, they talked for hours on end. Etho found that him an easy person to talk to, like most of the other hermits. However, as he chatted with the builder, he realized a few things.
Firstly, Grian was a pretty private person. Like himself, he led conversations in a way that focused on the other persons and never actually shared anything about himself. He would talk animatedly about his builds, interactions with hermits, and plans for the future, but not about himself, really.
Not that Etho cared all too much. He also didn’t talk about himself all too often. Though, it was interesting to chat with someone who had such a similar conversational style.
To add, Etho also found that the two of them shared similar senses of humor. He found himself chuckling quite a bit while talking with the builder, not feeling forced at all. He felt pride in making Grian cackle as well.
After these exchanges, they hung out briefly throughout the remainder of the world; though, mainly in groups with other people. Grian and Etho would occasionally visit each other, but both seemed to have an unspoken consensus on their schedules. The two of them were always starting new projects and working, so Etho was glad his newfound friend was always cognizant of that and - despite enjoying each other's company - understood if he wanted to leave abruptly to work on something. He was understanding of Grian’s sporadic exits as well.
As the months progressed and Etho continued to interact with Grian, he found himself seeking the builder out more often. It was easy to talk to him and approach him at any time of day, no matter how brief the interaction. Subconsciously, he found himself listening more intently whenever Grian spoke and standing beside him more frequently than beside the others.
He was always aware of how much he liked Grian. The man was mischievous and playful yet hardworking and very considerate. He always ensured that any damaged cause by his pranks were personally repaired, checked in and apologized for jokes (though, it’s not at all necessary most of the time), and was highly intelligent and creative. Etho found himself attracted to that especially, as he rambled on about various subjects, gave incredibly helpful advice and feedback to others and himself, and provided unique ideas that he would likely not consider otherwise.
So yeah, Etho greatly admired Grian.
Over the years, he’d grown very fond of the man.
He.. doesn’t know when exactly his feelings for him changed from platonic to romantic. What he does recall is the pang in his chest as he watched Grian and Scar pair up and act like a married couple. He remembers the many occasions where he felt himself staring at Grian for longer than normal. He recalls the warmth that filled his system whenever the builder smiled at him.
And he remembers the exact moment he realized he had a crush on his friend.
It was during the second life games. He had formed an alliance with Tango, Skizz, and Bdubs, joining them as team BEST. While the men chatted about their plans to invade the southlands, he heard the distinct sound of blocks breaking. Sneaking off while Skizz and Bdubs argue vocally over plans, he crouched in the direction he heard the sound.
As he stood in front of the newfound hole in their wall, Grian stared right back at him - pickaxe in hand.
Etho stared at him with a blank expression, before sneaking towards him. The builder seemed amused by his actions.
As Etho moved closer, Grian didn’t move from his place.
Now, to this day, Etho didn’t know what compelled him to do it, but..he decided to keep walking towards him, stopping when their faces were but a few inches away.
Grian stared up with mirth in his eyes. The redstoner stared down at him, taking in his smile and expression as something bubbled in his chest.
Then Grian grinned at him, and Etho felt his entire body heat up.
Any thoughts in his head flew out immediately as blood rushed to his face - which his mask thankfully covered.
It was Bdubs’ yelling that broke him out of his stupor, and he continued on as usual. He and the others chased the southern landers out of their base and managed to complete a boogey attack in the process.
But that incident was on Etho’s mind the rest of the day.
After a few hours of this, he made the decision to go mining so he could think about this in private.
He honestly did intend on mining, but…ended up staring at an unbroken stone block as thoughts raced his mind.
What exactly was that? He had never experienced a sensation like that before.
It took him a while to come to terms with what he just experienced, thinking about how he actually feels towards his friend and every interaction he’s had with Grian prior.
A terrifying realization struck him.
He liked Grian.
He really liked Grian.
And…he can never tell him about it.
Because there’s absolutely no way he would like him back.
Not like that.
Grian treats him like everyone else. Like a friend.
He wasn’t about to risk losing someone he loves (Does he love him romantically too? Etho doesn’t know.) over something like this.
He loves his friends.
He loves this friend.
He wasn’t about to lose him.
It’s fine to keep this hidden. Etho reasoned, staring at the block seriously. I will not jeopardize my friendship with him.
Besides, this is probably just a temporary problem.
—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was not, in fact, a temporary problem.
The problem, much to Etho’s horror, was only becoming worse.
After his realization, Etho subconsciously started to avoid Grian. He would still act normally around him, thanking his younger self for making the decision to wear a mask, but it was much harder to do so now.
(Odin’s beard, once Etho realized how he felt about Grian, getting flustered around him only seemed to increase in frequency.)
Unfortunately (or fortunately) for him, avoiding Grian only caused the man to seek him out more.
And there they were during the tenth world.
Etho, rationalizing that he would get suspicious or be upset if he stopped hanging around with him (not at all relating to the pang in his chest at the thought of not seeing Grian as often as he used to), started visiting him a bit more frequently.
Grian seemed pleased with this, as the two often sat on his dock and chatted while he fished. Sometimes, they would simply sit in silence and bask in the environment around them.
It was nice. It was calm.
It was… terrible in it’s affect on Etho’s feelings, which only seemed to be growing.
That wasn’t the end of it, though.
Because the fourth life game happened.
And boy oh boy.
He was not prepared for the events of that.
Okay. Grian gave him a diamond sword.
(Etho definitely didn’t smile every time he looked at it)
Etho then used said diamond sword to form an alliance with Grian.
Just the two of them.
…
Yeah…
To add to his suffering, the two needed to wait through the night to make their counterattack against the remaining players.
And there was only one bed left on bread bridge.
…
He did not get a single wink of sleep that night.
Grian, on the other hand, slept perfectly fine. He didn’t seem at all perturbed with sharing a bed.
“…”
Moving on from this, he was getting off topic. The point is, his romantic feelings towards Grian have only increased over the last two years.
And it was becoming more difficult for Etho to hide them.
Granted, no one seems to suspect anything, especially not Grian (Thank God ).
However, he has been caught staring at the builder a few times - each time playing it off as though he was spacing out.
It didn’t seem like much, but for Etho, it’s only proof of how much his feelings for the man have affected him.
And, to his absolute, complete and utter horror,
the fifth life game has only made his feelings grow .
Because of their bases’ close proximity and the interactive tasks, Etho and Grian have been seeing each other (along with the others) almost every day. The tasks themselves largely required socializing with the other members and, because of this, Etho would often have no choice but to interact with Grian, the exchanges often doing wonders for his progression in the game and terrible, terrible things to his heart.
It started small, the two of them only seeing each other during group hangouts and such. Grian would occasionally make a comment to him, and he would do the same.
Then Etho was tasked with jump scaring someone.
After several failed attempts (he was definitely surprising people, but none of them actually jumped), he decided to test his luck with scaring Grian. Noticing the builder’s keen gaze at his crafting table, Etho’s mouth curved upwards. Perfect.
Sneaking behind him, he suddenly chirped. “Hey Grian!”
Grian screamed, eye’s wide and panicked as he jumped away from him. It wasn’t until recognizing the culprit that the builder gave him a baffled look.
“Oh geez!”
Etho laughed quietly. Grian caught his breath and gave him an exasperated look.
“You don’t scare a man when he’s crafting!”
Etho chuckled, “I think that counts.”
Grian feigned an annoyed expression, crossing his arms. “You suck!”
“Sorry, sorry,” He gave the builder an apologetic look, which would be convincing were it not for the amused gleam in his eyes. “I had to do it.”
That caused Grian to perk up.
“Oh?” A sly smile made it’s way to the man’s face. He walked towards Etho, stopping when their faces were a few inches apart. Etho flushed as Grian smirked at him. “You had to do it, did you? What exactly did you have to do, Etho?”
Etho stammered at first, trying to regain his composure. “I can’t tell you!”
Grian leaned closer until their torsos’ were touching. Etho felt like he was suffocating.
“You sure you don’t want to share?” He teased.
Oh boy, this was dangerous.
Checking his imaginary watch with a panicked expression, Etho stepped away and rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. “Would you look at the time, I should get going.” Turning around suddenly, he sprinted away. “See ya!”
(If Etho had turned around once more, he would have seen the amused look on Grian’s face, eyes shining with fondness)
After that exchange, Etho literally malfunctioned. The moment he entered his base, he dropped to his knees, staring at the floor unblinkingly.
Cleo ended up finding him in that position an hour later, giving him a judgmental look but thankfully dropping the subject.
That was only the beginning of the most emotionally exhaustive days he’s ever experienced.
He heard Grian’s singing voice, which Etho found himself awfully fond of. It was slightly grainy (heh, ‘grian-y’), yet his charming enunciations and the unexpected timber in his voice were surprisingly soothing.
He was also able to make him laugh a few times with the ‘aha’ jokes, which made any embarrassment he felt seem worth it.
Oh, and Grian told Etho he loved him.
Yep.
That happened.
“Thank you?”
He said ‘thank you’.
He thanked him.
With a question mark.
…
Shortly after this, Etho would return to his base, bang his head on the wall hard enough to lose an entire heart, and flop to his knees like a wilted lettuce leaf.
Cleo stared at him for a moment when she returned, before sighing loudly and walking up the stairs. “Don’t stay up all night again.”
Etho gave a muffled response.
The next day, he tried to forget everything that happened.
Which was quite difficult considering Grian decided to pop in to visit and ask to join their alliance .
Etho, to his credit, managed to welcome him in casually, insisting that he didn’t need to do any to join upon the man’s inquiry.
Internally, he started to panic a bit.
It would be much more difficult to conceal this with Grian residing here.
Yet, any concern he had went straight out their non-existent window when the builder beamed at him.
The next few days were..something.
The tasks were getting harder.
More yellow names appeared on the server.
Heck, they even had a few reds.
Meanwhile, Etho, Grian, and Cleo continued to expand the base and gather resources. They were a great team, all three of them. Etho continued to act normally around him, the mask he’s created only breaking for one or two moments over the last few days.
Unfortunately for him, Cleo had been present for both those moments.
The first incident happened during Grian’s first night with them. Etho and Cleo had been sorting some of their chests to make room for Grian’s items.
“Oh,” Cleo wiped her forehead before pulling something out of her inventory. A bed. Handing the item to him without glancing up from the chest, she spoke, “this is G’s bed. Go give it to him, yeah?”
“On it.” Etho took the item and walked upstairs.
As he reached the extra bedroom in their base, Etho - still contemplating on how to organize their storage system - entered the room without knocking as he stared at the item in his hand, deep in thought.
“Hey Grian, I have your…” Etho trailed off, finally looking up. His eyes widened comically.
Grian was in the process on removing his shirt, staring at Etho like a deer in the headlights. Realizing the situation, he quickly pulled his shirt back down, embarrassed. “Um, thanks, you can leave it there.”
He nodded, placed the bed down, and left the room.
Cleo perked up as he heard Etho walk down the stairs. Cracking her back as she stood from the ground, she turned to him with a smile. “Good, you’re back. I-,” She blinked.
Etho was staring at the ground, face beet red.
Cleo paused. “What happened to you?”
The redstoner didn’t answer for a moment, walking robotically to a nearby wall, smacking his head against it, and flopping to the ground.
She was very disturbed now.
He didn’t stay like that for long, hearing Grian’s footsteps down the stairs. Straightening up immediately, Etho started examining a nearby chest intently.
Cleo’s eyebrows rose at that. She turned to Grian, whose gaze lingered on Etho for a moment, cheeks reddened, before turning back to her and asking what he could do to help.
It was here that he was certain Cleo made the connection between Grian and Etho’s subsequent random floppings.
The second incident proved his assumption right.
It was the aftermath of their shared task. He and Grian had finally accomplished their goal, much to the displeasure of the rest of the members.
Once the meeting at the secret keeper was complete, Cleo, Grian, and Etho returned to their base absolutely exhausted. The three of them plopped on the ground outside their front door, staring at the sunset with tired eyes.
Cleo groaned, “I still can’t believe of all the bloody tasks, you two got that one.”
Etho sighed. “Yeah, it was something alright.”
“At least it’s over.” Grian yawned, before leaning against Etho as he stared at the sunset.
Cleo watched with amusement. “Well, don’t you look comfy, G.”
“Etho is very comfy.” He responded sleepily, blinking slowly.
“Is he?” Cleo teased, before turning to Etho with a smirk. “What do you think about that…Etho?”
Etho, though previously tensing at the builder’s bold action, was now staring at Grian with a fond expression, eyes sparkling.
At Cleo’s inquiry, he perked up and looked at her, before realizing he was staring. His face reddened slightly as he looked away from her.
“You..” She glanced between Grian, who was completely knocked out, and Etho, who was looking in the opposite direction. Cleo could still see his ears, however, and noted the newfound red color to them.
“Oh,” She blinked, “you’re blushing.”
He tensed slightly at her words, but didn’t turn to look at her. “No I’m not.”
“You definitely are.” Cleo squinted her eyes, leaning forward to get a better look at his face.
“...”
“Huh, this is new.”
“...”
A silence fell over them, Cleo periodically glancing between him and Grian with a newfound curiosity, and Etho mentally willing himself to be teleported to the other end of the server, far away from the oncoming trainwreck of a conversation.
Eventually, Cleo spoke up slowly. “Etho.”
Etho didn’t look at her.
“Yeah?”
“You… aren’t the blushing type, correct?”
“...I wouldn’t describe myself as such, no.”
“And yet you’re clearly flustered right now.”
“...”
“By the most minimum contact with G.”
“...”
“You, whose been in the same position with several other hermits and usually just radiate angsty teen awkwardness.” Etho blinked at that.
“What?” He turned to her, raising an eyebrow…only to see her smirking.
..wait-
“Can’t hide your face now, huh?” She snickered at him, “Now before you turn away, tell me Etho.”
“Why do you seem so flustered around Grian as of late?” Her smirk turned into a teasing grin. “Did the stoic redstoner get his first crush?”
.
.
.
Cleo burst out laughing, tremors running through her shoulders. After a few moments, she wiped a tear from her eye, “Sorry, sorry. I couldn’t help myself. You make it so easy to tease you sometimes. I actually taught I was onto something for a..moment….there..”
Her smile slowly changed into a stunned expression.
Etho was blushing furiously .
“Oh.”
He quickly looked away, embarrassed.
Cleo’s mouth was agape.
“Oh my-”
“...”
“Wait-waitwaitwaitwait, do you actually like him?”
She could see his shoulders tense. “Um-”
Then, in an very uncharacteristic act, Cleo squealed. “Oh my God, you do!”
Grian shifted suddenly, causing both of them to freeze.
After he stopped moving, Cleo glanced at Etho and squealed quietly.
“You like like Grian.”
.
.
.
“Wow,” She let out a breath and leaned back against the wall. “That explains so much.”
Etho (finally) looked back at her and sighed. His cheeks still had a faint redness. “Please don’t tell anyone.”
“I won’t,” She turned to him with a smirk, “so long as you tell me everything.”
Etho stared at her for a moment before leaning forward and sighing dramatically. “If I must.” Glancing down at Grian, Etho looked up at Cleo again, sweat dropping. “Maybe somewhere a bit more private, though.”
“Oh, right. I’ll take him up.” In one swift motion, she lifted the builder up bridal style.
Etho felt another pang in his chest.
“Oh?” She stopped for a moment before smirking at Etho, who was staring at her intently. “Jealous, are we?”
Etho’s eyes widened before he looked away. “No.”
She rolled her eyes, “I’ll be back in a few seconds.”
And, true to her word, she was back in a matter of seconds.
Etho blinked as she reappeared just as soon as she left.
“Huh. Back already?”
Cleo shrugged, leaning back and smiling at him. “You, of all people, have a crush on someone and are actually willing to tell me about it. Of course I’m back already.” She grinned eagerly, a glint in her eye. “I wouldn’t miss this for the world.”
And that was how the learned about Etho’s one-sided, complicated relationship with Grian.
Her eyes grew soft as he told her everything.
“Oh, Etho. That’s..”
“I know.” The man sighed, leaning back as he rubbed his forehead. “Like I said, I’ve been trying to let this go, but-” He stared into the distance with an odd look. “-it’s more difficult than I thought.”
She was silent for a moment.
“Who said you needed to let this go?”
Etho blinked, before turning to her and tilting his head. “What else could I do? It’s inevitable that he would reject me.” He looked down, eyes conflicted. “As much as I’d like to tell him, he definitely only sees me as a friend. I don’t want to break our friendship.” I don’t want..to lose him.
Cleo stared at him.
“...”
“...”
He was pulled into a side hug. Etho’s eyes widened.
Glancing up, he was surprised to see Cleo smiling softly at him. “For someone so smart, you can be such an idiot sometimes.”
Etho just stared at her. Cleo continued, looking into dark sky.
“Feelings like this can’t just be forgotten so easily, especially not in this case. I know you’re just trying to look out for him, but your feelings matter to, you know.” She smiled sincerely at him. “G loves you, Etho. I-” She looked down. “I don't know if its in the same way you do, but…what I do know is this.” She stared at him directly in the eyes.
“Grian cares about you. Even if he didn’t feel the same way, he would never want you to stop being a part of his life.”
Etho stared at her for a while, taking in her words.
Eventually, she separated from him and stood up, stretching.
“Alright,” She sighed, rolling her arm. “I’m off to bed. Who would have thought fighting a warden and wither would be exhausting.” Glancing down at Etho, she grinned tiredly. “Think about what I said, yeah? And let me know if you ever want to talk about your cruuuuush~.” She sang out while walking inside.
Etho stared as she left. A few minutes passed before he sighed.
This conversation only left him more confused.
What exactly am I supposed to do now?
After a few minutes of fruitless thinking, he felt his eyes grow tired.
He should go to sleep soon. It’s getting pretty late anyways.
Etho closed his eyes for a moment.
Please let tomorrow’s task be simple.