aayjay
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"Hey, it's, uh, me..." And Dean sucks in a breath and sees stars from how badly he needs to breathe. He bites it back. As best as he can, and ends up hiccuping, gulping air like he’s dying from the need of it. "It's, I- I hate you and you hate me but there's- I need you." I need you. Dean's full of stuff he's never admitted before today- I loved you. I need you. God, he might as well just die here.
"Dean." Seth says, and he's not hanging up, and the music goes away and Seth's voice gets clearer. "Are you okay?" It's less a question, more of a confirmation, Dean thinks.
He feels at his weakest when he says, "No."- Set after Smackdown on August 1st. Trigger warnings for discussion of panic attacks and anxiety.
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all i've had today is, like, six gummy bears and some scotch by aayjay
Fandoms: Skyfall (2012) - Fandom
13 Nov 2012
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Bond hasn't been taking care of himself. It's up to Q to help; maybe just a little.
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Hail Mary Counter @hailmarytracker · 12 hrs
Days since last contact with Hail Mary: 9,716
🗨 1 ⇄ 2 ♡ 5It's been nearly 27 years since the Hail Mary departed. When the ISS detects a signal in the far off solar system, hope begins to grow, even as mysteries start to unravel and the universe becomes a little smaller.
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- English
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- 149,321
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- 25/31
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- 10
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Bookmarked by aayjay
24 May 2026
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everybody who reads PHM has BEEN saying this fic is G O O D and they were RIGHT. as someone who would rather walk into traffic than willingly look at any social media, it being described as "social media AU" put me off for a while - but it is a blend of epistolary, social media, articles, and prose as well. it's wonderful!!! i don't think Creator's Style (brilliantly done here) translates into an epub easily so I read it allll on the Computer which i almost never do for anything, so you know it's good!!!
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Megatron's new frame feels right in a way he's not entirely comfortable with. Luckily Starscream is here to
comfortharass him.Series
- Part 2 of Subharmonics
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"Experiencing Gore, Encountering Bill." Excerpts from the William F. Buckley Jr.-Gore Vidal Sex Letters by borevidal for sharkie
Fandoms: Political RPF - US 20th c., Historical RPF
19 Dec 2018
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“I never say no to sex or appearing on television,” Vidal groused, “but if I’d known it involved Bill Buckley I’d have made an exception.”
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- English
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- 10,996
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- 3/3
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Bookmarked by aayjay
08 Apr 2025
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i think about this fic SO much
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“Call me dad,” Jack clarifies, because well. If they’re gonna end up here, chest to chest, sizing each other up like God and his Only Son, choking on Fabuloso fumes and almost, almost touching, it’s Daniel who started it. Back there on that rain-doused planet, when he uttered that single word and wrecked Jack indelibly and forever.
Bookmarked by aayjay
18 Aug 2024
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deliciously fucked up, but in a lovely and consensual way that is, I think, necessary for good livin'. also, hot.
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An Open Window by hal_incandenza
Fandoms: Pacific Rim (Movies), His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
05 Jul 2018
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One day, the director of Oxford's tiny Dark Matter Research Unit receives a strange visitor. What follows will send him on an implausible journey to another world, an extraordinary research project, and a singular relationship.
Bookmarked by aayjay
21 Aug 2024
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absolutely ADORED this. Waaahhhh!!! that's the sound of me wailing. a more coherent note to be added later.