highfunctioningclotpole
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shot through the heart (and you're to blame) by highfunctioningclotpole
Fandoms: Merlin (TV)
23 Jul 2025
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Summary
merlin’s plan was simple: pine in silence forever and maybe die a little inside every time gwaine smiled at him. but then there was laser tag, a surprise kiss, and a whole lot of feelings. now he has to deal with the fact that his best friend might actually like him back. terrifying.
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Summary
Arthur spends his days working at his father's museum, leading tours, being bossed about by his sister and bored out of his brains.
Merlin spends his days working at Gaius' holistic pharmacy, stocking shelves and sneaking in breaks for his art work wherever he can.
When Gwen forces Merlin to accompany her on a tour of Pendragon Museum, everything changes.
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Summary
“Arthur. Stop.” Merlin didn't want to hear it. He couldn't. By saying the word it meant it was real and he was determined to pretend, for just a bit longer. “We're fine. C’mere.”
“You can't just keep avoiding the conversation! I'm serious.”
“I know you’re serious but I don’t want to hear it!”
Series
- Part 4 of Kinkalot 2023
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Summary
Gwaine wants a word with his boss, but Arthur is otherwise occupied. Gwaine can't help but stay and watch.
Series
- Part 11 of Merlin Bingo 2023
- Part 3 of Kinkalot 2023
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Summary
“I… I don’t normally do this.” Gwen managed between heavy breaths.
“I know, darling. But isn’t it fun?”
Series
- Part 10 of Merlin Bingo 2023
- Part 2 of Kinkalot 2023
Recent series
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
Percival and the knights like seeing Gwaine painted in white.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 0
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 23
- Kudos:
- 65
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- 2
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- 2,087
Bookmarked by highfunctioningclotpole
15 Aug 2023
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if you're looking for jesus (then get on your knees) by voxofthevoid
Fandoms: Captain America - All Media Types
19 Jun 2019
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Summary
Hot damn, is his first thought.
Threat assessment follows close on its heels because Bucky’s a goddamn professional.
Military, definitely. Male, built like a goddamn mountain. Bucky stares helplessly because shoulders that broad should be illegal. It’s the face that really fucks him up though. Hair as silver as the star on his chest, swept back from a face that’s all hard angles and deep lines. There’s a beard too, covering a jaw that looks strong enough to sit on, and its white is peppered with bits of dark blond, which should look ridiculous but doesn’t.
“You seem to know my name,” Bucky says, plastering on a charming smile. “Only polite to return the favor.”
“If you’re banking on politeness, you might be in the wrong business, son.”
Jesus, Mary, and motherfucking Joseph. This is how wet dreams and porn clips should start, not a goddamn interrogation.
Or,
S.H.I.E.L.D. Agent Bucky Barnes is captured on a mission and meets Commander Steve Rogers, the erstwhile Captain America.Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,171
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 7
- Comments:
- 500
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- 6,834
- Bookmarks:
- 1,440
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- 118,986
Bookmarked by highfunctioningclotpole
21 Apr 2023
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Summary
Arthur contemplates his son on the eve of his first Yule.
Series
- Part 1 of Merthur Family Series
Bookmarked by highfunctioningclotpole
03 Aug 2022
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Summary
Draco and Harry have rough sex. As punishment for being a brat (because of course he is), Harry makes Draco beg him to cum. Dirty talk in abundance!
Series
- Part 1 of Harry & Draco Fuck Rough
Bookmarked by highfunctioningclotpole
21 Jun 2022
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Summary
Teasing and banter have always been part of Merlin's friendship with the knights. But when a prank hits a sore spot for Merlin, the fallout is fiercer than anybody imagined.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,515
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 294
- Kudos:
- 5,924
- Bookmarks:
- 1,152
- Hits:
- 59,418
Bookmarked by highfunctioningclotpole
15 Apr 2022